Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:20,698 --> 00:00:22,698
Aah!
2
00:00:29,331 --> 00:00:30,331
Ugh!
3
00:00:41,931 --> 00:00:46,130
Rise and shine, sleepyhead.
4
00:00:46,131 --> 00:00:47,730
Good morning, sweetness.
5
00:00:47,731 --> 00:00:49,663
How did you sleep?
6
00:00:49,664 --> 00:00:53,697
Oh, like a rock.
7
00:00:53,698 --> 00:00:55,498
Like a rock. Mmm.
8
00:01:36,964 --> 00:01:40,063
Dick, what's taking so long?
9
00:01:40,064 --> 00:01:41,463
I'll just be a minute.
10
00:01:41,464 --> 00:01:44,563
Hey, Albright.
What's with the cape?
11
00:01:44,564 --> 00:01:46,863
Why, too much?
12
00:01:46,864 --> 00:01:50,563
Well, not if you're
fighting crime.
13
00:01:50,564 --> 00:01:53,430
For your information,
I think I look great.
14
00:01:53,431 --> 00:01:54,930
Dick, I'm gonna wait in the car,
15
00:01:54,931 --> 00:01:57,363
I want to go over the seating
chart for the fund-raiser.
16
00:01:57,364 --> 00:02:01,397
Oh, Mary, I love that jacket.
17
00:02:01,398 --> 00:02:03,097
Yeah, the way it has no buttons
18
00:02:03,098 --> 00:02:04,930
and flows off your shoulders.
19
00:02:04,931 --> 00:02:06,863
It's not a jacket, it's a cape.
20
00:02:06,864 --> 00:02:08,431
Oh, of course.
21
00:02:11,064 --> 00:02:13,563
If it's a cape, I don't like it.
22
00:02:13,564 --> 00:02:15,697
So, uh, what is this thing
23
00:02:15,698 --> 00:02:16,763
you're going to, anyway?
24
00:02:16,764 --> 00:02:17,764
It's a Charity auction.
25
00:02:17,765 --> 00:02:19,163
And what's Charity, again?
26
00:02:19,164 --> 00:02:20,730
Well, all I know is
they're giving out
27
00:02:20,731 --> 00:02:24,030
free drinks and paddles
with numbers on them.
28
00:02:24,031 --> 00:02:26,697
Well, I guess that's
what Charity's all about,
29
00:02:26,698 --> 00:02:29,531
getting liquored up
and spanking your neighbor.
30
00:02:31,464 --> 00:02:32,930
Oh, and Mary tells me
31
00:02:32,931 --> 00:02:34,763
I'll get to make a difference
in Someone's life.
32
00:02:34,764 --> 00:02:35,797
Wait, I thought
we weren't allowed
33
00:02:35,798 --> 00:02:36,897
to make a difference.
34
00:02:36,898 --> 00:02:38,563
No, we can make
little differences.
35
00:02:38,564 --> 00:02:40,663
We're not allowed to
make global differences.
36
00:02:40,664 --> 00:02:43,697
Can we blow up the earth?
37
00:02:43,698 --> 00:02:46,063
You see, that's
a global difference.
38
00:02:46,064 --> 00:02:47,897
It's so hard
to keep track of all this.
39
00:02:47,898 --> 00:02:49,763
I know, don't we have it all
written down Someplace?
40
00:02:49,764 --> 00:02:51,330
Yeah, it's all in
the mission statement.
41
00:02:51,331 --> 00:02:52,697
Where is that thing, anyway?
42
00:02:52,698 --> 00:02:54,297
Well, if anybody's wondering,
43
00:02:54,298 --> 00:02:55,963
I didn't leave it on the bus.
44
00:02:55,964 --> 00:02:57,997
Well, we can't be on a mission
45
00:02:57,998 --> 00:02:59,297
without a mission statement.
46
00:02:59,298 --> 00:03:00,597
You guys are gonna have
to write up a new one.
47
00:03:00,598 --> 00:03:02,230
What? Why us?
48
00:03:02,231 --> 00:03:03,363
Because subordinates Must do
49
00:03:03,364 --> 00:03:06,563
whatever the high
commander says.
50
00:03:06,564 --> 00:03:10,130
Boy, that reminds me
of a mission statement
51
00:03:10,131 --> 00:03:12,731
I once read on a bus.
52
00:03:20,564 --> 00:03:21,930
Aah!
53
00:03:21,931 --> 00:03:24,197
I'm ok.
54
00:03:24,198 --> 00:03:26,397
Nothing to see here.
55
00:03:26,398 --> 00:03:27,797
Sally: Don?
56
00:03:27,798 --> 00:03:30,297
Oh, hey, Jimmy.
57
00:03:30,298 --> 00:03:32,330
What's going on?
58
00:03:32,331 --> 00:03:34,930
You were supposed
to meet me for lunch.
59
00:03:34,931 --> 00:03:37,697
Oh, Sally, I'm sorry, I forgot.
60
00:03:37,698 --> 00:03:39,597
I've got to be honest with you,
61
00:03:39,598 --> 00:03:41,297
I didn't get much
sleep last night.
62
00:03:41,298 --> 00:03:43,830
Really? I got a ton, honey.
63
00:03:43,831 --> 00:03:46,097
I heard.
64
00:03:46,098 --> 00:03:50,263
Oh, poor baby.
Ok, you know what?
65
00:03:50,264 --> 00:03:52,830
I'm gonna come over at 8:00,
66
00:03:52,831 --> 00:03:54,997
and you and I are gonna go
67
00:03:54,998 --> 00:03:58,797
straight to bed, mister. Ok?
68
00:03:58,798 --> 00:03:59,964
See you, Jimmy.
69
00:04:04,564 --> 00:04:07,030
$60, going once, going twice,
70
00:04:07,031 --> 00:04:09,030
sold to Judith Draper!
71
00:04:09,031 --> 00:04:11,097
Come on up here and pick up
72
00:04:11,098 --> 00:04:13,497
your 2-day pass to the
iroquois falls sweat lodge.
73
00:04:13,498 --> 00:04:14,498
You deserve it.
74
00:04:14,499 --> 00:04:15,664
Judith Draper!
75
00:04:18,798 --> 00:04:21,297
Oh, before we auction
off our next item,
76
00:04:21,298 --> 00:04:24,297
let's all give a huge
round of applause
77
00:04:24,298 --> 00:04:26,597
to the man who is responsible
for this Charity,
78
00:04:26,598 --> 00:04:28,597
father Matthew of the
rutheford boys' home.
79
00:04:28,598 --> 00:04:30,564
Father Matthew!
80
00:04:33,531 --> 00:04:35,463
Nobody Ever claps
like that for me.
81
00:04:35,464 --> 00:04:36,763
Maybe if you opened your wallet,
82
00:04:36,764 --> 00:04:39,097
you cheap bastard.
83
00:04:39,098 --> 00:04:42,463
Next, we have this oil painting
84
00:04:42,464 --> 00:04:44,297
of the historic ground breaking
85
00:04:44,298 --> 00:04:46,163
of the rutheford boys' home.
86
00:04:46,164 --> 00:04:47,763
Isn't this beautiful?
87
00:04:47,764 --> 00:04:49,130
We'll start the bidding at $500.
88
00:04:49,131 --> 00:04:50,397
Who will give me $500?
89
00:04:50,398 --> 00:04:51,830
I have 5, who will give me 6?
90
00:04:51,831 --> 00:04:53,097
Nobody give him 6!
91
00:04:53,098 --> 00:04:56,263
6 from father Matthew,
who will give me 7?
92
00:04:56,264 --> 00:04:58,331
7! In your face, padre!
93
00:05:00,064 --> 00:05:03,297
7, 7's the bid. Now, do I hear 8?
8, anyone?
94
00:05:03,298 --> 00:05:04,298
800.
95
00:05:04,299 --> 00:05:07,063
Strudwick!
96
00:05:07,064 --> 00:05:08,530
You're not gonna let him
97
00:05:08,531 --> 00:05:10,263
walk away with This little
beauty for 8, are you?
98
00:05:10,264 --> 00:05:11,997
I should say not. 900!
99
00:05:11,998 --> 00:05:13,030
Top that, strudwick.
100
00:05:13,031 --> 00:05:15,163
$1,000.
101
00:05:15,164 --> 00:05:18,063
Oh, that is more.
102
00:05:18,064 --> 00:05:19,797
You're out of
your league, Solomon.
103
00:05:19,798 --> 00:05:21,530
Am I? 1,100.
104
00:05:21,531 --> 00:05:23,363
12. 1,201.
105
00:05:23,364 --> 00:05:24,397
13! 14!
106
00:05:24,398 --> 00:05:25,398
15! 16!
107
00:05:25,399 --> 00:05:27,731
17!
108
00:05:29,531 --> 00:05:33,463
$1,700. You're not
gonna let him have it
109
00:05:33,464 --> 00:05:35,230
for $1,700, are you?
110
00:05:35,231 --> 00:05:36,298
Yes.
111
00:05:38,264 --> 00:05:40,230
17, then, going once,
going twice,
112
00:05:40,231 --> 00:05:41,964
sold to Dick Solomon.
113
00:05:47,298 --> 00:05:48,763
Oh, thank you.
114
00:05:48,764 --> 00:05:51,363
All I can say is...
115
00:05:51,364 --> 00:05:54,031
uh, clap louder!
116
00:05:58,598 --> 00:06:01,263
Ok, mission statement.
117
00:06:01,264 --> 00:06:03,997
Mission statement.
118
00:06:03,998 --> 00:06:05,763
What is our mission?
119
00:06:05,764 --> 00:06:07,363
Well, you know,
I always remember it
120
00:06:07,364 --> 00:06:08,730
by our mission song.
121
00:06:08,731 --> 00:06:10,263
Oh, right, right.
Yeah, Yeah, Yeah.
122
00:06:10,264 --> 00:06:15,298
♪ Across the void
we come a-warping ♪
123
00:06:16,598 --> 00:06:20,997
♪ Dum diddle DEE LEE
OOH OOH OOH Ooh Ooh ♪
124
00:06:20,998 --> 00:06:25,497
♪ Glorious and something
something ♪
125
00:06:25,498 --> 00:06:27,997
♪ Dum diddle Dee Lee
Yadda Yadda ♪
126
00:06:27,998 --> 00:06:31,397
Spaceship! Right.
127
00:06:31,398 --> 00:06:33,263
Ok, let's just start
from scratch then.
128
00:06:33,264 --> 00:06:35,263
What is our mission?
129
00:06:35,264 --> 00:06:39,397
To boldly go where no
man has gone before.
130
00:06:39,398 --> 00:06:40,563
That's clunky.
131
00:06:40,564 --> 00:06:42,430
Yeah, and that excludes Sally.
132
00:06:42,431 --> 00:06:45,330
Mmm, and us, too, technically,
since we're not men.
133
00:06:45,331 --> 00:06:47,530
Yeah, yeah, and lots
of men have been here.
134
00:06:47,531 --> 00:06:48,631
Yeah.
135
00:06:51,698 --> 00:06:52,897
Eh, let's put it in.
136
00:06:52,898 --> 00:06:54,430
Yeah, it'll give Dick
something to cut.
137
00:06:54,431 --> 00:06:55,431
Right.
138
00:06:58,431 --> 00:07:01,063
Well, that's the news.
139
00:07:01,064 --> 00:07:02,763
Um-hmm.
140
00:07:02,764 --> 00:07:04,797
I'd really better
get some sleep.
141
00:07:04,798 --> 00:07:06,730
Ok, I'll go brush my teeth.
142
00:07:06,731 --> 00:07:08,663
Well, actually, Sally,
143
00:07:08,664 --> 00:07:11,063
I think I should sleep
alone tonight.
144
00:07:11,064 --> 00:07:12,497
Why?
145
00:07:12,498 --> 00:07:17,263
Because I might get called
out to a 480 at the 212.
146
00:07:17,264 --> 00:07:20,330
A fire at the fire department?
147
00:07:20,331 --> 00:07:23,597
All right, Sally, I'll
be straight with you.
148
00:07:23,598 --> 00:07:27,263
Uh, I can't sleep in
the same bed with you.
149
00:07:27,264 --> 00:07:28,597
Is it 'cause I stink?
150
00:07:28,598 --> 00:07:30,830
No.
151
00:07:30,831 --> 00:07:32,063
Drool?
152
00:07:32,064 --> 00:07:33,064
No.
153
00:07:33,065 --> 00:07:34,430
Pee kind of orangey?
154
00:07:34,431 --> 00:07:36,063
No!
155
00:07:36,064 --> 00:07:37,830
Well, then, what is it?
156
00:07:37,831 --> 00:07:39,763
You snore, Sally.
157
00:07:39,764 --> 00:07:43,263
Snore? I do not snore.
158
00:07:43,264 --> 00:07:46,030
Girls do not snore.
159
00:07:46,031 --> 00:07:47,763
Well, you do.
160
00:07:47,764 --> 00:07:50,430
You mean, like...
161
00:07:50,431 --> 00:07:54,598
NO, it's more like...
162
00:07:56,131 --> 00:07:58,231
oh, that's bad.
163
00:08:07,198 --> 00:08:08,363
Judith.
164
00:08:08,364 --> 00:08:09,864
Dick.
165
00:08:12,231 --> 00:08:14,363
Did you say something
about my painting?
166
00:08:14,364 --> 00:08:16,230
No. Oh.
167
00:08:16,231 --> 00:08:18,330
You're not going to hang
168
00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:19,597
that up in here, are you?
169
00:08:19,598 --> 00:08:21,430
Uh, no, Nina. This is not
a hanging painting.
170
00:08:21,431 --> 00:08:23,897
It's more of a
walking around painting.
171
00:08:23,898 --> 00:08:27,798
Oh, that's nice. Why don't
you take it for a walk?
172
00:08:29,464 --> 00:08:31,464
Good morning.
173
00:08:33,864 --> 00:08:35,863
Mary, I thought your kind
174
00:08:35,864 --> 00:08:38,363
didn't venture out in daylight.
175
00:08:38,364 --> 00:08:41,630
Well, if my cape
is too hip for the room,
176
00:08:41,631 --> 00:08:43,397
maybe I'll just take it off.
177
00:08:43,398 --> 00:08:48,530
I love my painting.
It's so nice.
178
00:08:48,531 --> 00:08:49,830
Here's your mail.
179
00:08:49,831 --> 00:08:54,663
Oh, something from
the boys' home.
180
00:08:54,664 --> 00:08:58,130
Ah, at last, the respect
that I deserve.
181
00:08:58,131 --> 00:09:01,663
"Dear sir or madam..."
182
00:09:01,664 --> 00:09:03,997
hey, they've invited
me to become a patron.
183
00:09:03,998 --> 00:09:05,230
Not everybody gets that.
184
00:09:05,231 --> 00:09:06,231
I did.
185
00:09:06,232 --> 00:09:08,098
Me, too. I got 3.
186
00:09:09,964 --> 00:09:11,231
This painting sucks!
187
00:09:19,831 --> 00:09:21,230
Strudwick.
188
00:09:21,231 --> 00:09:22,397
Dick.
189
00:09:22,398 --> 00:09:24,230
Let me get right to it.
190
00:09:24,231 --> 00:09:26,063
Last night, I couldn't sleep
191
00:09:26,064 --> 00:09:27,897
knowing that
I had taken from you
192
00:09:27,898 --> 00:09:29,897
a painting that is near
and dear to your heart.
193
00:09:29,898 --> 00:09:31,863
That's why I'm willing
to let you have it...
194
00:09:31,864 --> 00:09:34,197
I don't want it.
195
00:09:34,198 --> 00:09:37,163
You didn't let me finish.
That's why I'm willing
196
00:09:37,164 --> 00:09:40,097
to let you have it for,
say, $900.
197
00:09:40,098 --> 00:09:42,697
Forget it. I never wanted
198
00:09:42,698 --> 00:09:44,430
that piece of crap, anyway.
199
00:09:44,431 --> 00:09:47,197
Oh, really? Then why
did you bid on it
200
00:09:47,198 --> 00:09:50,163
like a young lion in springtime?
201
00:09:50,164 --> 00:09:54,463
To drive up the price
and piss you off.
202
00:09:54,464 --> 00:09:57,230
Well, it didn't work!
203
00:09:57,231 --> 00:09:59,063
Ok, let's start again.
204
00:09:59,064 --> 00:10:01,397
We'll begin the bidding
at, say, $900.
205
00:10:01,398 --> 00:10:02,597
Get lost. That was a bid.
206
00:10:02,598 --> 00:10:03,598
That was not a bid.
207
00:10:03,599 --> 00:10:05,297
It was, too. You bid $900.
208
00:10:05,298 --> 00:10:06,797
Going once, going twice.
Go away!
209
00:10:06,798 --> 00:10:08,398
Sold! You owe me $900.
210
00:10:09,564 --> 00:10:12,197
We'll call it 8.
211
00:10:12,198 --> 00:10:13,730
7, and I get to kiss your wife.
212
00:10:13,731 --> 00:10:14,963
Out, idiot!
213
00:10:14,964 --> 00:10:17,763
Fine, but at least
I have something
214
00:10:17,764 --> 00:10:19,764
to show for my idiocy.
215
00:10:22,631 --> 00:10:25,398
Aha! So, you have my painting.
216
00:10:36,364 --> 00:10:38,331
She snores like a pig.
217
00:10:39,364 --> 00:10:41,163
Why is this our problem, again?
218
00:10:41,164 --> 00:10:42,763
Well, read the first paragraph
219
00:10:42,764 --> 00:10:43,930
of our mission statement.
220
00:10:43,931 --> 00:10:45,897
Mmm. "We must confront
All human problems"
221
00:10:45,898 --> 00:10:47,563
to understand
the human experience."
222
00:10:47,564 --> 00:10:48,997
Who wrote this crap?
223
00:10:48,998 --> 00:10:50,097
That was you.
224
00:10:50,098 --> 00:10:52,463
It's good. Um-hmm.
225
00:10:52,464 --> 00:10:54,397
Well, maybe if we constrict
226
00:10:54,398 --> 00:10:55,598
the airflow to her nostrils.
227
00:10:57,198 --> 00:10:59,298
Yeah.
228
00:11:02,031 --> 00:11:03,563
Uh, better do the mouth, too.
229
00:11:03,564 --> 00:11:05,498
Ok. Yeah. I'll just...
230
00:11:12,164 --> 00:11:14,063
all right! Yeah!
231
00:11:14,064 --> 00:11:16,163
Sometimes, the most
obvious solution
232
00:11:16,164 --> 00:11:18,497
is the most brilliant. Yeah.
233
00:11:18,498 --> 00:11:20,497
No more snoring, and she gets
234
00:11:20,498 --> 00:11:21,830
all the oxygen she needs
235
00:11:21,831 --> 00:11:24,530
through her, uh...
236
00:11:24,531 --> 00:11:26,697
wait, where's the
third intake again?
237
00:11:26,698 --> 00:11:28,498
The gills?
238
00:11:30,498 --> 00:11:31,498
Aah! Aah!
239
00:11:31,499 --> 00:11:32,531
Aah!
240
00:11:34,664 --> 00:11:35,830
What happened?
241
00:11:35,831 --> 00:11:36,997
Nothing. Nothing.
242
00:11:36,998 --> 00:11:38,163
Ok.
243
00:11:38,164 --> 00:11:41,263
So, um, how'd I do?
244
00:11:41,264 --> 00:11:43,964
Piss poor!
245
00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:50,897
Hi, rutheford clothing Drive?
246
00:11:50,898 --> 00:11:54,397
Yeah, I donated a delightful
cape ensemble this morning,
247
00:11:54,398 --> 00:11:57,330
and I think you made
a mistake on the receipt.
248
00:11:57,331 --> 00:12:00,497
Yeah, you estimated
the value at $300.
249
00:12:00,498 --> 00:12:03,497
Well, I paid
much more than that.
250
00:12:03,498 --> 00:12:04,997
I know they haven't been popular
251
00:12:04,998 --> 00:12:07,163
since the 1800's. Look...
252
00:12:07,164 --> 00:12:09,363
if I put a one
in front of the 3,
253
00:12:09,364 --> 00:12:11,797
would that be
against your rules?
254
00:12:11,798 --> 00:12:14,030
"Dear friend of
the environment."
255
00:12:14,031 --> 00:12:15,930
great. All of a sudden,
256
00:12:15,931 --> 00:12:16,931
every Charity in the world
257
00:12:16,932 --> 00:12:18,263
is asking me for money.
258
00:12:18,264 --> 00:12:20,663
Well, once you get on one
Charity's mailing list,
259
00:12:20,664 --> 00:12:21,664
you're on them all.
260
00:12:21,665 --> 00:12:23,097
Yeah, but, how are you supposed
261
00:12:23,098 --> 00:12:25,363
to judge who gets priority?
262
00:12:25,364 --> 00:12:28,097
Do I adopt a fruit bat,
263
00:12:28,098 --> 00:12:31,297
save the rainforest,
or build shelters
264
00:12:31,298 --> 00:12:32,530
for America's homeless?
265
00:12:32,531 --> 00:12:34,663
You just help the ones
you can, Dick.
266
00:12:34,664 --> 00:12:36,497
Yeah, but why me?
267
00:12:36,498 --> 00:12:39,730
Why can't they just
help each other?
268
00:12:39,731 --> 00:12:41,297
And how would they do that?
269
00:12:41,298 --> 00:12:44,097
Simple. The rainforest
guys cut down the jungle
270
00:12:44,098 --> 00:12:45,297
to build affordable housing,
271
00:12:45,298 --> 00:12:46,298
America's homeless moves in,
272
00:12:46,299 --> 00:12:47,697
and once they get settled,
273
00:12:47,698 --> 00:12:50,931
They'll be happy to open
their homes to fruit bats.
274
00:12:52,664 --> 00:12:56,530
It's not rocket science.
275
00:12:56,531 --> 00:12:58,563
That's not how it works.
276
00:12:58,564 --> 00:12:59,830
Oh, I know how it works.
277
00:12:59,831 --> 00:13:03,097
I fork over $1,700,
and all I get
278
00:13:03,098 --> 00:13:05,563
is a painting of 2
monks and a shovel.
279
00:13:05,564 --> 00:13:07,997
The guy couldn't
even paint hands.
280
00:13:07,998 --> 00:13:10,663
They look like potatoes.
281
00:13:10,664 --> 00:13:12,831
I want my money back!
282
00:13:23,331 --> 00:13:24,363
Don.
283
00:13:24,364 --> 00:13:27,230
Harriet tubman.
284
00:13:27,231 --> 00:13:29,163
Don.
285
00:13:29,164 --> 00:13:31,963
Sally, what are you doing here?
286
00:13:31,964 --> 00:13:34,497
I finally found a cure
for my snoring.
287
00:13:34,498 --> 00:13:36,663
Oh.
288
00:13:36,664 --> 00:13:37,763
Isn't that great?
289
00:13:37,764 --> 00:13:39,530
I won't be
waking you up anymore.
290
00:13:39,531 --> 00:13:42,263
Yeah, that's super. Good night.
291
00:13:42,264 --> 00:13:44,064
Good night.
292
00:13:59,831 --> 00:14:01,597
Aren't you gonna go to sleep?
293
00:14:01,598 --> 00:14:05,063
Oh, no. I slept all day.
294
00:14:05,064 --> 00:14:06,930
Why is that?
295
00:14:06,931 --> 00:14:10,863
So my snoring wouldn't
wake you up, silly.
296
00:14:10,864 --> 00:14:15,164
Now go back to sleep. Shh shh shh shh.
Ok. All right.
297
00:14:24,998 --> 00:14:28,363
Cliff: Hey there, Woody, what's
that hair doing in my beer?
298
00:14:28,364 --> 00:14:30,864
Woody: I think it's the
backstroke, Mr. Clavin.
299
00:14:31,898 --> 00:14:33,830
Sally!
300
00:14:33,831 --> 00:14:36,198
Uh, I'll just, I'll put it
on closed captioning.
301
00:14:39,398 --> 00:14:40,630
Norm!
302
00:14:40,631 --> 00:14:41,631
Sally!
303
00:15:04,998 --> 00:15:07,164
Stinky.
304
00:15:12,064 --> 00:15:14,064
Yummy.
305
00:15:21,831 --> 00:15:26,930
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh.
306
00:15:26,931 --> 00:15:30,698
Ok, ok.
307
00:15:32,431 --> 00:15:37,363
Ok, I'm just gonna take
the Pillow away.
308
00:15:37,364 --> 00:15:39,398
Come on.
309
00:15:40,531 --> 00:15:41,764
Aah!
310
00:15:45,098 --> 00:15:47,230
Will you just go to sleep?
311
00:15:47,231 --> 00:15:50,363
Can't you just go to sleep?
312
00:15:50,364 --> 00:15:52,797
I'm sorry. Don't be mad.
313
00:15:52,798 --> 00:15:53,798
All right, all right.
314
00:15:53,799 --> 00:15:57,498
I'm sorry. Really sorry. Ok?
315
00:16:07,098 --> 00:16:10,430
All right, let's bring
this mission statement home.
316
00:16:10,431 --> 00:16:14,297
How will we know when we've
fulfilled the goal of our mission?
317
00:16:14,298 --> 00:16:16,997
Um, when we've become the
perfect human beings?
318
00:16:16,998 --> 00:16:21,297
Yes. Yes, But human beings
by nature are imperfect.
319
00:16:21,298 --> 00:16:24,163
Wait a second. I see
what you're going for.
320
00:16:24,164 --> 00:16:26,630
Yes, and for this mission
to be perfect,
321
00:16:26,631 --> 00:16:29,097
it actually has to be
really flawed.
322
00:16:29,098 --> 00:16:31,963
Well, all right! It already is.
323
00:16:31,964 --> 00:16:33,963
I mean, look at you.
324
00:16:33,964 --> 00:16:36,331
You're the poster boy
for imperfection.
325
00:16:39,231 --> 00:16:40,630
How's that?
326
00:16:40,631 --> 00:16:43,130
Well, your b.O. Smells
like chicken soup,
327
00:16:43,131 --> 00:16:44,930
and you got b.O. A lot.
328
00:16:44,931 --> 00:16:47,997
Fair enough, But, uh,
329
00:16:47,998 --> 00:16:49,130
don't sell yourself short
330
00:16:49,131 --> 00:16:50,563
in the imperfection
department, Harry.
331
00:16:50,564 --> 00:16:51,730
How do you mean?
332
00:16:51,731 --> 00:16:54,030
You're not smart.
333
00:16:54,031 --> 00:16:58,097
And you scare away the ladies.
334
00:16:58,098 --> 00:17:00,397
I feel like punching
your face in.
335
00:17:00,398 --> 00:17:02,764
Me first, fatso.
336
00:17:10,831 --> 00:17:12,930
Father Matthew will
be right with you.
337
00:17:12,931 --> 00:17:14,564
Thank you.
338
00:17:21,164 --> 00:17:25,163
Father Matthew, allow me
to be perfectly Frank.
339
00:17:25,164 --> 00:17:27,630
I am not a wealthy man.
340
00:17:27,631 --> 00:17:30,130
I have to feed and clothe
a family of 4
341
00:17:30,131 --> 00:17:32,997
on a professor's modest salary.
342
00:17:32,998 --> 00:17:36,097
I can't expect a priest
to understand poverty,
343
00:17:36,098 --> 00:17:40,963
but let me tell you,
I have to make
344
00:17:40,964 --> 00:17:42,563
a lot of sacrifices...
345
00:17:42,564 --> 00:17:45,263
No, no, please, let me finish.
346
00:17:45,264 --> 00:17:47,663
I simply have no room
in my limited budget
347
00:17:47,664 --> 00:17:49,930
for extravagances like Charity.
348
00:17:49,931 --> 00:17:51,830
Therefore, I am returning
this painting,
349
00:17:51,831 --> 00:17:54,363
and I want you
to give me my money back.
350
00:17:54,364 --> 00:17:55,863
Unhand me, sir!
351
00:17:55,864 --> 00:17:57,497
Good morning.
352
00:17:57,498 --> 00:17:58,797
Oh, uh, father Matthew.
353
00:17:58,798 --> 00:18:01,597
Well, I'm sorry
to keep you waiting.
354
00:18:01,598 --> 00:18:04,330
Ben, this is dr.
Solomon, the nice man
355
00:18:04,331 --> 00:18:06,363
who gave us the money
to have the bus fixed.
356
00:18:06,364 --> 00:18:07,630
Thank you, Dr. Solomon.
357
00:18:07,631 --> 00:18:11,130
Oh, Well, hey,
you're very welcome.
358
00:18:11,131 --> 00:18:13,197
Thanks to your generous pledge,
359
00:18:13,198 --> 00:18:16,263
we can fix the bus, and our kids
360
00:18:16,264 --> 00:18:19,897
will see things they
have never seen before.
361
00:18:19,898 --> 00:18:23,463
The tire and rubber
works in akron,
362
00:18:23,464 --> 00:18:27,063
the miniature golf hall of fame,
363
00:18:27,064 --> 00:18:28,997
wapakoneta, the home...
364
00:18:28,998 --> 00:18:31,930
The birthplace
of Neil Armstrong,
365
00:18:31,931 --> 00:18:34,497
and of course, the air
and Space museum,
366
00:18:34,498 --> 00:18:36,530
and the aquarium.
367
00:18:36,531 --> 00:18:39,163
Oh, yes, aquariums are nice,
if you like fish, but...
368
00:18:39,164 --> 00:18:40,530
And there's also a chance we can
369
00:18:40,531 --> 00:18:44,863
take a day trip to see
the Toledo mud hens.
370
00:18:44,864 --> 00:18:48,297
Now, that's all very Well,
father Matthew...
371
00:18:48,298 --> 00:18:50,997
Allow me to be perfectly Frank.
372
00:18:50,998 --> 00:18:53,797
I know you are not
a wealthy man.
373
00:18:53,798 --> 00:18:54,798
No, I... I was going to say that...
374
00:18:54,799 --> 00:18:56,497
And I know it wasn't easy
375
00:18:56,498 --> 00:18:57,997
raising a family of 4
376
00:18:57,998 --> 00:19:00,130
on a professor's modest salary...
377
00:19:00,131 --> 00:19:01,497
Yeah, that's exactly what I...
378
00:19:01,498 --> 00:19:05,698
Which is why your generosity
means so much to us.
379
00:19:06,831 --> 00:19:08,563
Oh, well...
380
00:19:08,564 --> 00:19:09,564
but...
381
00:19:09,565 --> 00:19:11,830
No, no, please. Let me finish.
382
00:19:11,831 --> 00:19:14,730
Given your circumstances,
383
00:19:14,731 --> 00:19:17,997
your gift means so much to us.
384
00:19:17,998 --> 00:19:20,863
Sure, Martin abend
gave us $50,000,
385
00:19:20,864 --> 00:19:23,597
but he owns
the ball bearing plant.
386
00:19:23,598 --> 00:19:27,797
Relative to him, your gift
was far more generous.
387
00:19:27,798 --> 00:19:30,330
You mean, I'm better
than the rich guy?
388
00:19:30,331 --> 00:19:32,530
Well, I wouldn't want
to say that...
389
00:19:32,531 --> 00:19:33,697
No, no, no, go on, say it.
390
00:19:33,698 --> 00:19:35,363
I'm not gonna tell him.
391
00:19:35,364 --> 00:19:38,197
You are a great man.
392
00:19:38,198 --> 00:19:41,997
Thank you, father Matthew.
You're so right.
393
00:19:41,998 --> 00:19:45,263
So, why did you
bring in the painting?
394
00:19:45,264 --> 00:19:49,963
Oh, that. Because
I want you to, uh...
395
00:19:49,964 --> 00:19:52,730
uh, I want you to...
396
00:19:52,731 --> 00:19:53,930
I want you to have it.
397
00:19:53,931 --> 00:19:55,263
Thank you.
398
00:19:55,264 --> 00:19:58,563
No, no, please.
The pleasure's mine.
399
00:19:58,564 --> 00:20:00,898
Now, if you'll excuse me.
400
00:20:08,498 --> 00:20:10,297
Could you either
get this kid off my leg,
401
00:20:10,298 --> 00:20:12,030
or else put another one on,
402
00:20:12,031 --> 00:20:15,298
because it's really
throwing off my balance.
403
00:20:19,598 --> 00:20:22,197
"There are some things
in Life money can't buy.
404
00:20:22,198 --> 00:20:25,798
For everything else, there's
this mission statement."
405
00:20:27,064 --> 00:20:29,830
That's your conclusion
to the mission statement?
406
00:20:29,831 --> 00:20:31,830
Yep. It was between that or
407
00:20:31,831 --> 00:20:35,431
double "A", ahnk ahnk,
mc mission statement.
408
00:20:36,531 --> 00:20:38,030
Did you guys just get bored
409
00:20:38,031 --> 00:20:39,063
and start watching television?
410
00:20:39,064 --> 00:20:41,431
No. Yeah.
411
00:20:42,698 --> 00:20:46,563
You know, it's weird.
Until I started snoring,
412
00:20:46,564 --> 00:20:48,463
I never really appreciated.
413
00:20:48,464 --> 00:20:50,197
How much don loves me.
414
00:20:50,198 --> 00:20:51,597
Yeah, and until
I started giving,
415
00:20:51,598 --> 00:20:53,763
I never really appreciated
How much I have.
416
00:20:53,764 --> 00:20:55,730
Man, we're so lucky.
417
00:20:55,731 --> 00:21:00,163
♪ Across the void
we come a-warping ♪
418
00:21:00,164 --> 00:21:04,997
♪ Across the fields
of stars we soar ♪
419
00:21:04,998 --> 00:21:09,763
♪ We pledge to land and
something, something ♪
420
00:21:09,764 --> 00:21:13,830
♪ Dum Dee dum Dee
Da Da Da da... spaceship ♪
421
00:21:13,831 --> 00:21:15,030
One more time!
422
00:21:15,031 --> 00:21:19,330
♪ Across the void
we come a-warping ♪
423
00:21:19,331 --> 00:21:22,931
Captioning made possible by Carsey-Werner company
I.L.C. And the U.S department of education
424
00:21:27,664 --> 00:21:31,304
public performance of captions prohibited without
permission of National captioning institute
28901
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.