Original subtitles

Previously on The L Word: Generation Q...

[DANI] Sophie came to Ojai.

- What was that like? - It was strange,

and then fine, like nothing had happened.

And when it was over, I was relieved.

I think we dodged a bullet, you and me.

[SOPHIE] Thanks for understanding.

You're just such a good friend.

[TESS] If she says she wants to be just friends,

you should take her at her word.

People can change, though, right?

They can, but they rarely do.

I was gonna surprise Nat with a fancy dinner.

She called and canceled on me.

[TOM] I think she's nuts

for not trying to work things out with you.

You're not so bad yourself.

[TESS] Oh, my God. I'm sorry.

- I'm seeing someone. - [SHANE] Oh.

[TESS] Cherie, this is Shane.

We've actually met before.

Of course you have.

I want you to join the gallery.

[PIPPA] Why would I do that?

Isaac Zakarian is a racist.

[BETTE] Because I will represent you.

I can't work with you.

I'm really happy for you and Bette.

I'm glad that she found someone who is kind and funny.

I'm just not sure it's gonna work out with us.

[GIGI] Yesterday I was your girlfriend,

and today I'm no one?

Check her out. I'm moving on.

[BOTH MOANING]

Are you hitting on me?

If my feelings change, I will let you know.

[CHERIE] Gonna let me in?

♪ Boombadoombadoom, bae ♪

♪ Ah, ya, ya, yeah ♪

♪ Ah, ya, ee ♪

♪ How are you gonna turn it up for me ♪

♪ Turn it up for me ♪

♪ How are you gonna turn it up for me ♪

♪ Turn it up for me ♪

♪ How are you gonna turn it up for me ♪

♪ Turn it up for me ♪

♪ How are you gonna turn it up for me ♪

[DANI] Okay, I think that was three miles.

- [MICAH] Probably more. - Probably.

[MICAH] So, what's going on at work?

I convinced the board to invest in all these not-for-profits.

Yeah?

We're setting up partnerships and endowments and...

- That's huge. - Yeah.

They were clearly shocked I had plans to do anything.

Thought I was just gonna be my dad's puppet, which...

- Oh, cute. - [DOG WHINING]

- [MAN] Thank you. - Maybe I should get a dog.

No, my new floors are too nice.

I got to tell you something, but you got to not freak out.

Okay, but bear in mind

that my dad recently got arrested

and my fiancée left me at the altar,

so I can't take too much more.

Yeah, yeah, uh, well, I slept with a woman.

Shut up.

Yeah. I, uh, I did. Yeah.

I thought you were gay.

Same. Me, too.

[CHUCKLES]

And I thought I was special.

You're obviously the most special.

It was Maribel.

- Okay. - Sorry. Sorry. Sorry, but what?

Was it good?

Was it weird because she's my ex-fiancée's sister?

Was she better than me?

Huh?

It was good. Yeah, it was.

Oh, my God.

But she hasn't spoken to me,

and it's been like a week.

- Oh, my God. - What?

You like her.

You have to tell her.

We'll see about that. [SCOFFS]

I've actually been having this, like,

pseudo-sexual friendship with Gigi.

Okay. All right. Good for you. Wow.

[CHUCKLES] Yeah.

Ever since we saw my dad getting arrested, it's like...

I think about her and I want to be near her, but...

That-that is textbook trauma bonding, right there.

I hate how quickly you analyze me.

Can I meet her?

- Sure, you can meet her. - Yeah?

- Yeah. Yeah. - Okay.

What do you want to do?

Just... go to Dana's, just the whole gang?

- Yeah. Please. - No.

No, I-I can't just show up there.

Yes, you can.

Dani, those spaces are

just as much yours as they are Sophie's.

It's not just Sophie.

- It's Finley, too. - Yeah, but she's not...

I mean, I don't think I'd punch her again,

but it's possible, you know?

♪ You know I'm bringing bombastic ♪

♪ I'm feeling fucking fantastic ♪

♪ Turn up the music, yeah, blast it ♪

♪ You know I'm playing like ♪

[ALICE] Thank you so much, everybody.

- [CROWD CHEERING] - Good night. Thank you.

- Oh. Okay. - [ASSISTANT] Whoa, whoa, whoa.

[AUDIENCE GASPS]

[ALICE] Oh, just another day at work.

Okay, get me out of this thing. Get me out.

- Mm-hmm. Free me, please. - Put your arms up.

Just gonna get... Get it off. I got to pee.

- Okay. - There you go.

- Right. Hey. - Hey.

Hey. Oh, great news:

I didn't cry in the shower this morning.

- Oh, that is great news. - Yeah.

And, uh, I haven't seen Finley in, like, a week, so...

- Oh, is she still avoiding you? - Yup.

Oh, God. Hey, maybe she'll be at Dana's

- for the karaoke party. - Oh, God.

I was hoping you'd forgotten you invited me to that.

What? No, never. We're gonna have a good time.

It's gonna be casual, it's gonna be fun.

I'm actually thinking of inviting Tom.

- [CLICKS TONGUE] - Tom, the editor?

Yeah. Well, we had a little bit of a bonding experience

over shellfish the other night.

[CHUCKLES] Okay, as you do.

So, what... are you gonna ask him out?

- No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. - Why not?

- Eh, maybe, huh. - That was quick.

- Okay, I got to get to post. - Yeah.

I'll get you a rough cut by the end of the week, okay?

- Okay, amazing. - All right. See you later.

No, I'll see you tonight.

- Hoping you'll forget. - I definitely won't.

♪ You know who I be, step on the scene and my flow too clean ♪

♪ Wild for the night only mean one thing ♪

♪ Chilling with my girls and we cut loose strings ♪

♪ Pull up, yeah, we down for whatever ♪

♪ Aiming for the cheddar ♪

Thank you so much for coming in tonight.

I hope I didn't ruin anything special.

Oh, no.

The Man vs. Wild marathon can wait.

I'll hang with Britt tomorrow.

Uh, why don't you tell them to come tonight?

Oh, shit.

Maybe I should. I'm sure they'd have fun.

Plus, with my discount, I'd save a couple bucks on a date.

Again, you don't get a discount and neither do your friends.

Eh, we'll see about that.

It is very exciting that you're moving on, though.

God, I know. I feel so good about it.

Britt's great.

I don't know if I'm gonna marry them or anything,

but they're nice, they're fun.

I feel like I'm finally moving on from Sophie, you know?

Who is here, right? That's not, like, a mirage?

Uh, yeah, that's her.

- Great. It's... great. - It's okay.

Yeah.

I was very drunk last time...

- Ooh, thank you. - Here you go.

- You're welcome. - [SHANE CLEARS THROAT]

Yeah, but then I just realized, you know, Sophie was right.

Oh, I love hearing that.

Yeah, and I just sent Tom a, you know,

- a casual text. - Good.

I mean, I haven't heard back.

What'd you text?

- "Thinking of you". - [MARIBEL] Oh...

- Honey. - [ALICE] Really? Is that bad?

Okay, it's bad.

It's just so...

[ALICE] What... boring, pathetic?

- Lame? Oh, God. - Basic.

- Okay. - Oh, shit.

She is here.

[ALICE] Now's your chance.

- Is it? - [SHANE] Listen.

No drama tonight, please.

Okay. I promise.

- Um... [CHUCKLES] - Do you know how to do this?

[SOPHIE] She loo... Okay, she needs my help. I'm just...

- I'm gonna go over there. - [ALICE] Oh, I'm sure...

- Yeah, she looks desperate. - I got to pee, so

- I'm gonna come with you. - Just say, "Thinking of you",

when you see her, really works well.

Okay.

♪ Yes, it's the we-e-k-end... ♪

You're like a nana. "No drama".

[SHANE] Would you want that in your bar? I...

[ALICE] No. No, no, no. I totally get that.

Hey!

- Hi. - ♪ Hi, hi, hi. ♪

[ALICE] Oh.

I did my vocal warm-ups in the car.

I'm actually really sad I missed that.

Um, I have good news for both of you.

I am not singing tonight.

- Yes, you are. - Yes, you are.

No, I'm not. Hey, do you want to try

that new drink Tess put on the menu?

- If it's bourbon. - Ah, Sarah. Hi.

- Thank you. Thank you. - I'm so happy to be here.

There's no other place on Earth I'd rather be.

- That was really believable. - Here you go.

I just... I hate chasing people down.

I feel like that's what I do all day.

[ALICE] Yeah, I get it. It's very demoralizing.

[SHANE] Who are you chasing?

'Cause I know it's not Gigi.

Just all the artists I want to work with.

The rebels, the disrupters, the game changers.

I mean... none of them want to join Zakarian.

Pippa still won't sign with you?

She won't even take a meeting with me.

What, she's not susceptible to your charm?

Well...

Wow.

- You're attracted to her. - No. It's just that, um...

She's everything.

- Wow. - Yeah.

[ALICE] Look, I get it.

I am also trying to bone somebody I work with.

I'm not trying to bone her.

I'm just trying to work with her.

Mm.

She has a group show tonight with her students.

I think maybe I should go.

- Tonight? - Tonight?

Yeah, but I don't want her to feel like I'm stalking her.

- [ALICE] No. - [SHANE] All right, here.

Novel concept...

why don't you just stay here and try to enjoy yourself?

[BETTE] All right, all right.

I will, I will.

All right, where's the songbook?

[ALICE] Oh, you don't need it.

I've already made the selection.

- Maybe I won't be here. - You're singing.

[UPBEAT CLUB MUSIC]

[GRUNTS SOFTLY]

[MUFFLED SINGING]

Why is this so hard right now?

Um, I think that you...

you only need one XLR cable.

I think you have a bunch here.

Uh...

Okay.

- Um... Oh. - Oh. Sorry.

[CHUCKLES] You're fine.

[CLEARS THROAT]

How do you know how to do all this stuff?

Well, when I made a bunch of small movies,

I had to learn how to do

a little bit of everything, you know?

Master of none.

- Oh. - Sorry.

- Oh. [LAUGHS] - My bad. Sorry.

Aw, you're fine. You're totally fine.

It's, uh, like when you're on an airplane,

and you're sitting in window, but you got to pee.

The guy in the middle is like,

"Oh, no, please, just, like, go right ahead".

Okay.

- Look at my butt or my vagina? - [LAUGHS]

Butt. Always butt.

- Really? [CHUCKLES] - Yeah.

You don't want to give your poom poom to a stranger.

- [FEEDBACK WHINES] - Ooh, there she is.

[SOPHIE] Yup.

Okay. Here. Thank you.

I got it.

[SOPHIE SIGHS] It's fine.

Um...

I'm sorry if it's weird that I'm here.

- I just, like... and you - No, it's not your fault,

- never work Thursdays, so... - and I never work Thursdays.

- [CLEARS THROAT] - Are you avoiding me?

Me? No. No.

Of course not. I'm just, uh...

[CHUCKLES] Okay.

Okay.

Okay. See ya.

Goddamn.

She's hitting on me.

Who is?

Sophie.

Coming on to me. Like, like, hard.

Okay, but, isn't that a good thing?

No. It's confusing is what it is.

And now I'm, like, I'm sweating

and I didn't wear deodorant today.

- [LAUGHS] - I didn't think I was working.

And...

I wear it sometimes.

Sweetie, I know that this is hard for you.

Yeah, she just came in and just started, like,

fucking hooking up "hexlar" cables

like some sort of cable goddess.

- It's like... - X... XLR cables.

Whatever. I know tools, not cables,

but I didn't need her help. I had it.

Of course you didn't.

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

How are you supposed to get over someone

when they're just around all the time?

That I don't know.

She's got to pick a side, right?

Shit or get off the pot,

or some saying that makes sense here.

Why don't you talk to her?

- Tell her to back off a little. - Yeah.

Yeah, I will. Maybe.

I'll think about it. Later.

It's not looking good.

- [LAUGHS] - [CHUCKLES] Okay.

- [LAUGHING] - [RINGTONE PLAYS]

Oh.

I'm gonna take this.

- Hi. - Just gonna talk to her,

and say, "Yeah, Sophie, stop hitting on me. Not in my bar".

Shane's bar. Whatever.

♪ You can find me in the club ♪

[BETTE] Yeah, but if I were running or something.

- [ALICE] I know. - They would dissipate.

- Everything is okay, but... - Guys. Guys. Guys.

- What? - Um...

Cherie Jaffe came by the other night.

- What do you mean? - What?

Wait, came by where?

Here.

[BETTE] For what?

At first to see Tess,

and then later on she came by alone to see me.

Oh... Does Tess know?

[BETTE] Are you gonna tell her?

I mean, no. Nothing happened.

- Really? Like... Okay. - Yeah, Alice. Really.

Well, uh, something must have happened

or else you wouldn't have brought it up.

Forget it, forget it, forget it.

- Okay. - [SIGHS] Anyway, Bette.

How's Gigi? Tell me all about it.

I don't know, it's...

Over that fast?

- Yeah. - [SHANE CHUCKLES]

Uh... Wow. She ruins everything.

- [SHANE] That was fast. - I mean, I don't know

that it ever really started, you know.

I mean, it wasn't, like, this epic meeting

of the minds or anything.

- Does she know that? - Oh, I'm sure she does.

Did you talk to her about it? Because she loves

to talk about things, like, feelings.

And I know how much you hate those.

Yeah. I do.

But I'm right, right? It's a lot of...

Ad nauseam.

[UPBEAT CLUB MUSIC]

♪♪

She's avoiding me.

She is definitely avoiding me.

Well, did you tell her how you feel?

- Well, no. - [SCOFFS]

Uh, well, I will tell her that.

Later. I don't know. I'll think about it.

What song should we sing?

Bitch, I ain't singing no damn karaoke song, okay?

This voice is reserved for the shower.

What? You can actually sing, though.

There's not enough liquor in the whole damn world

to get me to sing up there in front of Alice and...

Oh... Dani.

Nobody's telling you to sing in front of Dani.

[SOPHIE] No, Dani is here.

She is right there.

- [CLEARS THROAT] - Oh, God.

You good?

Yeah. Of course. Why?

- Oh, God. - Hey, hey, it's gonna be okay.

All right? It's gonna be great.

All right, she's just gonna...

Fuck me.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure that our Lyft is still outside

- waiting for my rating, so... - No. No.

What happened to you two reclaiming your space?

You know what, you're right. We are.

We definitely are. We are.

Attaboy.

Just gonna go in and confront it head on.

Well, you're a better person than me.

- Meet you at the bar. - Yup.

- You're fine. Come on. - [CHUCKLES]

You're good.

♪♪

[MARIBEL] Is he actually coming over?

- Yeah. Why are you freaking out? - I slept with him.

- What?! You slept with him? - Yes. I slept with him.

- You didn't tell me anything? - I know. Shh, shh!

Micah. You're here.

Hi. Yeah, I-I'm here.

Wow, this is just great. This is great.

I mean, this is just so great.

Are you-are you being weird?

- Hmm? - Do you know something?

- Uh... - Okay.

- Hi. - Hi.

Hi. Hello. Yes, hi. Um, hi.

Uh, let me know if you guys need anything.

Oh, no. We're good. Thank you so much, though.

Thank you for asking.

Okay, so, I actually need something.

I need you to be nice to Dani tonight.

- Dani's here? - She is.

Yeah. Yeah, uh,

and can she just have, like, a nice night out?

You know, we can all try to be civilized.

She gonna punch me in the face again? Be honest.

She hasn't been able to rule that out.

- Copy. [CLEARS THROAT] - Um...

But you're gonna be nice to her, right?

- So... - Yeah. God, yeah. Of course.

Yeah. Same.

Okay, just not... not too nice, you know,

Okay, I get it.

Everybody's gonna be normal because there's nothing

to be weird about with any of us, right?

- Right. Yeah, right. - Yeah. Yeah.

- Exactly. - Right. Okay. I'm...

Let me know if you guys need anything.

And if Dani's gonna punch in me in the face,

just give me a high sign.

- That would help. - Sure. Yeah.

- This was great. - Cool.

Um... [CLEARS THROAT]

Oh, dang. Hello?

Oh, hell. Hold on. I'm getting a phone call.

What are... That's not even a phone.

- What? - What are you talking about?

G... No, what are you... [SHORT CHUCKLE]

So, I haven't heard from you.

Yeah, there's been a crisis at the border,

so kind of been, you know, doing my lawyer thing most days.

Yeah. Right.

- Yeah. - Yeah, um...

Well, do you want to grab lunch

- sometime this week? - I have work.

Right. That makes sense. Yeah.

Do you want a drink?

You have one.

That's great. That's... that's awesome. Um...

Just gonna check this out over here.

[DEEJAY] What's up, everybody?

[CHEERS, APPLAUSE]

Welcome to Dana's first ever karaoke night.

- Okay, um... - First up, to start us off,

- let's give it up for Alice... - Uh, yeah. Uh, you, there.

- You, there. - ... Bette,

- and our boss... - Oh, okay. Yeah. I'm sorry.

- ... Shane. - Yep. You go in the middle.

- All right. What are we singing? - You're the bro...

uh, the brown hair.

- You're the guy. - Why am I the guy?

- I'm always the guy. - Oh, my God.

- [CHEERING] - Oh, fuck.

Seriously? All right, all right, all right.

- Okay, okay, okay. I'm the guy? - Okay.

- Yes, you're the guy. - Yes, yes, yes.

- All right. - Ready?

♪ If you see a faded sign at the side of the road ♪

♪ That says 15 miles to the ♪

♪ Love shack ♪

[SHANE WHOOPS]

♪ Love shack, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Well, I'm headed down ♪

♪ The Atlanta highway ♪

♪ Looking for the love getaway ♪

♪ Headed for the love getaway ♪

♪ I got me a car, it's as big as a whale ♪

♪ And we're heading on down to the love shack ♪

♪ I got me a Chrysler, it seats about 20 ♪

♪ So hurry up and bring your jukebox money ♪

♪ The love shack is a little old place ♪

- ♪ Where we can get together ♪ - [WHOOPS]

♪ Love shack, baby ♪

♪ A love shack, baby ♪

♪ Love shack, baby, love shack ♪

♪ Love shack, baby, love shack ♪

♪ That's where it's at ♪

♪ Sign says ♪

- ♪ Whoo ♪ - ♪ "Stay away, fools" ♪

♪ 'Cause love rules at the love shack ♪

♪ Well, it's set way back in the middle of a field ♪

♪ Just a funky old shack and I want to get back... ♪

It's amazing how the ego takes a hit

even if you know somebody isn't right for you.

Yep.

How are you feeling about Sophie?

Um...

Fine.

Good. Yeah. Ojai was good.

Or not good, but, um...

Closure can be powerful.

Yes. It was, and now I'm...

[SHANE, BETTE AND ALICE CLAMORING]

... I'm good.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

I'm out of breath.

- It's the "bang bang". - [BETTE] Okay.

- [ALICE] You ready? - [BETTE] Yeah.

♪ Bang, bang, bang ♪

♪ On the door, baby ♪

♪ Knock a little louder, sugar ♪

♪ Bang, bang, bang on the door, baby ♪

♪ I can't hear you ♪

[WHOOPS]

♪ Bang, bang, bang on the door, baby ♪

♪ Bang, bang, bang on the door, baby ♪

♪ Bang, bang ♪

♪ Bang, bang ♪

♪ Your what? ♪

♪ Tin roof, rusted ♪

♪ Love shack, baby, love shack ♪

♪ Love shack, baby, love shack ♪

♪ Love shack, baby, love shack ♪

[CHEERING AND WHOOPING]

[SHANE EXCLAIMS]

[WHOOPING]

[CHEERING]

Oh, my God. That was so fun.

[DEEJAY] That was Alice, Bette and Shane.

- Did you get your needs met? - Oh, my God. He's here.

- It's Tom. - [SHANE] Oh, that's Tom?

He came. He came.

[DEEJAY] Okay...

Look at that.

50 bucks, they sleep together tonight.

Oh, I do not want to spend any time picturing that.

♪♪

Ah. Well. Let's never do this again.

Yes. Never. Nice job.

Nice work.

[DEEJAY] Heidi!

- [DANI] Bette. - Hey.

You were so good.

- You're such a liar. - Oh, come on.

- I don't lie to you. - What, do you think

we should take it out on the road?

- Is that what you're saying? - Well, I think

if you would've sang on the campaign trail,

- we might've won it. - Yeah, right.

- I don't know about that. - [LAUGHING]

I'm so glad to see you.

- I've missed you. - Well, good.

Because, um, I've been working on something for us.

What do you mean?

It's too early to say,

but I think you'll be pleased.

- Really? - Mm-hmm.

[BETTE] Okay.

[HEIDI] ♪ One way or another ♪

♪ I'm gonna find ya ♪

♪ I'm gonna getcha, getcha, getcha, getcha... ♪

You were so right. People love karaoke.

I had no idea.

[MUFFLED SINGING] ♪ One way or another... ♪

Can I ask you a question?

Yeah. Of course.

Why did Cherie break up with me?

What?

Cherie broke up with me, and I think

it has something to do with you.

[SIGHS]

Tess, I'm-I'm sorry,

but I don't know what that would have to do with me.

She said it was "messy",

so she was gonna take herself "out of the mix".

I don't know why she would say that.

♪ One way or another... ♪

I'm just gonna ask you this,

like, just straight up, did you sleep with her?

No.

Tess, come on.

I do a lot of shitty things, but no.

I did not. Is that...

Did she tell you that?

I'm calling bullshit.

Tess, come on. Seriously?

- Yeah, seriously. Like... - Come on.

You just, you have this look on your face,

and I feel like you're lying to me,

- and I just, I hate - I'm not lying.

- being lied to. - I'm... I'm not...

I am not lying to you.

But something is different. Like, something happened.

- I don't know what, - Nothing happened.

but I legit feel like I'm going

- a little bit crazy, here, okay? - You're not crazy, Tess,

- but nothing happened. - Okay, then...

Then will you tell me what's going on?

Oh, my God.

- You're not gonna change, - No, no, no. Tess. Tess.

and it was so stupid of me to expect you to.

- I just... I can't... No, please. - Tess, come here.

- Can you just not touch me? - Okay. All right.

I...

I'm done.

[SOMBER MUSIC]

♪♪

[DOOR SLAMS SHUT]

[QUIETLY] Fuck.

[EXHALES]

[LIVELY CHATTER]

[SOPHIE B. HAWKINS' "DAMN I WISH I WAS YOUR LOVER" PLAYING]

Thank you.

Hi. Fancy seeing you here.

Hi, Gigi.

♪ That old dog has chained you up all right ♪

♪♪

♪ Give you everything you need... ♪

You want to meet me in the bathroom in five?

- For old time's sake? - [CHUCKLES]

- Um, listen, I... - [LAUGHS] I'm kidding.

- Yeah. - I mean, don't get me wrong,

I do think there is a world

where we are fucking in the bathroom right now.

Oh. Funny.

♪ Daylight comes ♪

♪ Make sure you were smiling and warm... ♪

What went so wrong with us, Bette?

Do you really want to talk about this...

- Yeah. I do. Yeah. - ... right now? Now?

Okay.

Um...

I-I think we both know

that we're-we're not right for each other.

I'm curious about your perspective.

I think I need more.

♪ This monkey can't stand to see you black and blue ♪

♪ I give you... ♪

Do you really think there's someone out there

who checks all your boxes, Bette?

As a matter of fact, I know there is.

- Good night, Gigi. - Good night.

♪ Don't say you'll stay 'cause then you go away ♪

♪ Damn, I wish I was your lover ♪

♪ I'd rock you... ♪

[TOM] It was the wedding from hell.

- [ALICE] It was? - Yeah.

It was like the wedding of my nightmares.

[ALICE] Oh, God. I can only imagine.

My nightmares are usually about spiders, but...

Her great-aunt Gilda kept congratulating me.

[LAUGHS]

[HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] "There he is. There's that handsome groom".

- That's really funny. Come on. - Is it really?

She called me handsome, so that's cool, I guess.

Well, you are. You are.

Look, you've got your little tie,

and then your little buttons,

and some flowers... It's good.

- Really? - Very handsome. Yeah.

Thank you. I've been fasting.

- That's probably what you're seeing. - Oh, yeah. That's what it is.

- This is all Master Cleanse. - Oh, nice.

How fucked-up is that,

that I'm still trying to look good for her, though?

Tom, we all want to look good for our exes.

- It's very common. Relax. - Oh.

- Yeah. Normal. - They looked great.

- Mm. - You know, they looked so happy.

And there I was, the only person at the wedding...

single.

I take that back. Gilda's single, too.

- Don't ask me how I know that. - Right. [LAUGHS]

Well, I am really, really, really, really,

- really glad you showed up. - Really?

Yeah. I was texting you and, like, I didn't know

- if you were getting... - Oh, my God.

- What? - I was so happy when you texted.

- You... Really? - Absolutely.

You have the best timing ever.

They were about to do the first dance,

and that's a bit of a trigger for me,

seeing as their song was "our" song when we dated.

- No? - Yes.

- The same s... She used the same song? - The exact same song.

- Ew. - Yeah.

- That's what I'm talking about. - I don't like her.

I don't like her, either.

Anyway, your text was right on time.

It was easy for me to get out of there.

I was like, "I have a client

who has a bit of a... book emergency,

- so I'm-a have to go... - A client?

Well, client just sounds more urgent than friend.

- Right? - Y-Yeah. That totally does...

- And they bought it, too. - Yeah.

So thank you. You are a good friend.

Well, you are very welcome.

That is what friends are for.

Well, speaking of friends...

- Speaking of friends... - What?

Anyone caught your eye?

- That's hard to tell. - Oh, yeah?

Mm-hmm.

Gilda said I'm a great wing-man,

- so... - Okay.

You throw me in the game, Coach,

- I'm-a play. - Oh, I would like to see that.

- Oh, yeah? - You think you can help?

I... All I got to do is hit the dance floor, and it's on.

- Please show me techniques. - You want to see the magic?

I'm-a go out to the dance floor.

- Okay. - You want to come with me?

No, I want to watch.

Okay, well, I'm-a go out to the dance floor,

and when I get back, I'm-a have a plethora

of lovely ladies for you. You ready?

I'm... Show me. Yes.

- There it is. - [LAUGHS]

♪ Come on, give me what I need ♪

♪ Yeah, promises are never easy... ♪

[MICAH] Yeah, fun fact.

Maribel never wants to speak to me again.

- She didn't say that. - No, but she basically said

that she has to solve the crisis at the border

- and then... then, - [LAUGHING]

maybe she'll have time to date me. If I'm lucky.

Well, maybe she panicked.

Couldn't say what she really meant.

Or she thinks she made a giant-ass mistake,

and I'm gonna just die on my own.

- So, uh, full... - Oh, no, no. No, you won't.

Come on. Look.

That guy has been staring at you for, like, five minutes.

You know, he's probably straight and is hoping you are, too.

[SCOFFS] Okay.

Not to bolster the stereotype,

but he did sing a Kelly Clarkson medley earlier.

Oh. Okay.

Go talk to him.

Go, go on.

You got this.

- Sorry. - Oh, God. Thank you.

Okay. [LAUGHS]

How'd it go?

You look like it went well.

Yeah, it was fucking great.

- [STIFLED LAUGHTER] - [GLASSES CLINK]

Here you go.

Oh, I didn't order that.

It's from her.

[POP SONG PLAYING INDISTINCTLY]

♪♪

You gonna talk to her?

I probably should.

[LINE RINGING]

Fuck. Come on, Tess, come on.

[FINLEY] ... and I really don't need your ass

- in my face... - [OVER PHONE] It's Tess.

Leave a message or try me at Dana's.

[FINLEY] Fuck.

Uh, hi.

Okay, I'm just gonna say it again, I love you.

I think I've always loved you, and...

be with me.

Fuck.

[SHANE] Finley, what are you doing?

- Hey, sorry. Uh... - What?

I'm practicing telling Sophie...

to stop messing with my head,

or something like that. It's not going well.

Okay. Um, I'm sorry.

But listen, um...

Tess, she had to go home early,

so, uh... I desperately need

- your help in there. - Oh, yeah.

No problem, boss. Is she okay?

Yeah. Yeah. No, she's fine. She's fine.

It's just, you know...

- Yep. Got it. Got it. Of course. - Okay. Got to get that done.

- You know what I mean? - Oh, and, uh, I fed the rats.

So you don't need to worry about that.

Fuck.

[QUIET CHATTER]

[PIPPA] So, here we are using pen

and ink on canvas.

It's, you know, it was such a slick idea, when...

Hold on a moment.

Um, I'm-a be right back.

Uh, this is not the appropriate time or place for another pitch.

I-I completely agree.

Do not ruin this moment for my students.

I would never do that. I...

I heard that one of your students was working

in the style of early Basquiat and I just...

I came to see for myself.

Look for a piece by Gray Wielebinski.

He's gonna redefine neo-Expressionism.

[UPBEAT MUSIC]

♪♪

- [MARIBEL] What happened? - [SOPHIE] And then she broke up,

and her, and it was a whole thing, which, you know what,

I'm not even thinking about that.

- Oh, no. - It was just so stupid.

I didn't want to hear it. Really, it was dumb.

What's happening over there?

Mm.

Okay, it looks like,

you know, he's talking to a really hot guy.

Uh, yeah, it does seem that way, but...

Yeah, I fucking knew it.

What? You knew what?

Excuse me. I'm gonna do a thing. Hold my bag.

Oh, shit. Okay. But wait, wait, wait.

Wait, you have to tell me about the sex.

Don't forget, okay? Come back.

- All the way from here. - [CHUCKLES]

Hmm, hi. Hello.

Hi.

Was I an experiment to you?

What? I...

Just to see what it would be like to sleep with a woman?

♪ And I said, "Me, too"... ♪

I'm sorry.

That-that is not what this was.

'Cause it sort of feels that way.

Okay, wait. What do you mean? I just...

I just asked you out and you shot me down.

- I didn't shoot you down. - You weren't exactly excited,

or, like, even open to the idea of dating.

- I mean, I... - Wow.

I am so sorry I wasn't enthusiastic enough for you.

Maybe I should smile more, too.

That is not what I meant, and you know that's not

- what I meant. - Maybe I was a little nervous.

- Were you? - Of course. I'm human.

I didn't mean to imply that you're...

But instead of asking for clarification,

you find the hottest guy here to grind up on.

Okay, look, I think there was

some sort of miscommunication here.

Yeah. This definitely doesn't feel

anything like Love & Basketball.

No. No, it doesn't.

♪ Damn, we made it so far ♪

♪ Red eyes from the red light... ♪

- Whoa. Um... - [CLEARS THROAT]

You better tell her to be nice to him, or I'll kill her.

What? You know about them?

- I sure do. - Oh, my God.

Well, do you have details? I'm dying to know what happened.

Mm-mm. None that I'm willing to share.

[CHUCKLES] Okay, well...

I'll just keep harassing my sister.

- She'll break eventually. - Did you send me a drink?

Yeah, I did.

Was that an apology for, uh, brutally abandoning me

at the altar in front of all of my friends and family?

'Cause I'm-a need more than a drink for that one.

Ooh. Can't we just pretend to be nice to each other?

This is me pretending to be nice.

[CHUCKLES]

Does everyone cheat?

Is that just something everyone does?

Um...

No.

♪ I did my hair... ♪

I don't... I don't think so.

I... Why?

Is there something or someone in particular?

N-N-No.

You don't get to know that kind of stuff about me.

Okay. [CHUCKLES]

Well...

- you look great. - I know.

[BOTH LAUGH]

♪ Damn, we made it so far ♪

♪ Red eyes from the red light ♪

♪ And that just set the mood ♪

♪ You say you're obsessed with me... ♪

- ♪ So I took a second ♪ - [SOPHIE LAUGHS]

- ♪ And I said, "Me, too" ♪ - God, you're just...

- You're unreal. - ♪ I'm obsessed with me-e-e ♪

♪ As much as you ♪

♪ Say you'd die for me, I'd die for me-e too... ♪

[SIGHS]

I'm sorry. I have to, um...

I'm sorry.

No, no. It's fine. I'll just be here.

[INDISTINCT CHATTER]

Reclaiming my space.

[DOOR OPENS]

[SOPHIE] Hey.

- You can't be in here. - Finley.

No. It's employees only.

Hey, I don't know what you think you saw out there,

- but that was just... - Nothing. I was just coming out

to tell you to not hit on me,

and then you were hitting on her,

so it kind of just cancels the other thing out.

It's like, um, physics or whatever.

Okay, but Dani and I, we're... I'm just trying...

I-I... It's none of my business, okay?

We're done. Okay?

You can talk to whoever you want, okay?

We're just friends, right?

- Is that what you want? - Is that a joke?

Of course that's not what I want.

I think I've been pretty clear about that.

All right, well, you were

fucking someone else the other day.

- I fucking heard you. So loud. - Oh, come on.

You know that's not real, Sophie.

God, you make it...

I'm trying to get over you,

and you make it fucking impossible.

How? How do I do that?

You asked me to stay, so I stayed.

Right? Then you asked for space, so I gave you space.

And any time I'm near you, I...

I feel something, and it's like,

I-I just...

Do you feel it? Do you feel it, or am I fucking crazy?

- 'Cause I really... - Yes, okay? You're not crazy.

Then what the fuck, dude?

This is...

I...

This is hard.

[SCOFFS] This is so fucking hard.

[SIGHS]

- What are you scared of? - I'm not scared.

There's just a lot to consider here, Finley.

Like Dani.

- No. Not just... - Right.

- Not just Dani. It's... - Then who?

- Who is there to consider? - Everybody.

Nobody thinks that we should be together.

Why do you give a fuck what everybody else thinks?

- Who cares? - Okay, you know what?

Look, I just... I don't...

[SIGHS]

- I don't. I... - What the fuck is that?

- Are you hiding? - No. I...

I don't want to make a scene.

[SCOFFS]

[SLOW, SOMBER MUSIC]

♪♪

You're never gonna choose me, are you?

[EXHALES DEEPLY]

I...

I just...

just need some time.

- [CHUCKLES] - Okay?

Ooh. No. No, no. You don't get any more time, okay?

I can't... I'm done waiting.

I-I got to... I'm-I'm done.

I got to go back to work. Fuck.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

♪♪

[SONG ENDS]

[ACOUSTIC GUITAR PLAYING]

♪♪

Excuse me. Sorry. Excuse me.

♪♪

- Hey. You okay? - Hey.

Uh, yeah, I've been better. You?

Well, the whole Tom thing is kind of backfiring.

- Really? I mean, he's here. - Nah.

He said we were "great friends".

- Oh. - It's okay.

- Oh, God. - You know,

I'd make the first move, usually.

But the possibility of rejection is, like,

something I can't handle right now.

Well, you can't be scared forever.

Mm, I think one more night of crippling fear is okay.

[CHUCKLES] Um...

Not for me, I don't think.

No?

No. I...

Finley's not that bad.

- I know that. I love her. - Yeah.

[DEEJAY] ... second half of the night.

So do I.

I...

Will you excuse me a sec?

Yeah.

I don't know. It's like...

Oh, oh. Sorry. Sorry.

Just one second. Thank you.

I... I think she's embarrassed by me.

[SHANE SIGHS]

Don't look at me like that. So mean.

- I'm, like, actually in pain. - All right. Okay, okay, okay.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay, calm down, all right?

- Straighten up a little bit. - [EXHALES SHARPLY]

All right, now answer me this.

You obviously have feelings for her.

She has feelings for you.

What am I missing?

It's fucking hard. It's like...

I don't know. I tried.

I don't know. Maybe it's over.

Maybe she's the one, and I just fucked it up.

Maybe so, but...

at least you gave it a shot.

- [SCOFFS] - [SOPHIE] ♪ All I want to... ♪

Great, and this is our song. Mine and Sophie's. Awesome.

This is your song?

- Shut up. - Okay.

♪ Can you come a little closer... ♪

- Is that... ? - What?

♪ Here comes the breath ♪

♪ Before we get a little bit closer ♪

- ♪ Here comes the rush ♪ - Oh, my God.

♪ Before we touch, come a little closer ♪

[SHANE] Well, that doesn't look over to me.

No. No, it doesn't.

- Holy shit. - ♪ Doors are open ♪

♪ The wind is really blowing... ♪

I got to go somewhere, so you're gonna...

you're gonna lock up tonight, okay?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, boss, of course.

- Go get her. - ♪ It's not just all physical ♪

♪ I'm the type who won't get oh so critical ♪

♪ So let's make things physical ♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're oh so typical ♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're oh so typical ♪

♪ All you think of lately ♪

And this is true.

♪ Is getting underneath me ♪

[LAUGHING] Oh, shit.

♪ All I dream of lately ♪

♪ Is how to get you underneath me ♪

- Oh, my God. Excuse me. - Dani. Dani.

- ♪ Here comes the heat... ♪ - I got this.

I see that.

♪ A little bit closer ♪

♪ Here comes the spark ♪

♪ Before the dark, come a little closer ♪

♪♪

♪ The lights are off and the sun is finally setting ♪

♪ The night sky is changing overhead ♪

♪ It's not just all physical ♪

♪ I'm the type who won't get oh so critical ♪

♪ So let's make things physical ♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're oh so typical ♪

♪ I want you close, I want you ♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're typical ♪

♪ I want you, Finley, I want you ♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're typical ♪

Oh, my God. Okay, here we go.

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

You got it. You got it. You got it.

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

[LAUGHS]

- ♪ Ooh, ooh ♪ - [CHUCKLES]

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Here come the dreams of you and me ♪

♪ Here come the dreams ♪

Don't do that.

♪ Here come the dreams of you and me ♪

♪ Here come the dreams ♪

♪ It's not just all physical ♪

♪ I'm the type who won't get oh so critical ♪

♪ So let's make... ♪

- Hey. Hello. - Hello.

♪ I won't treat you like you're oh so typical ♪

♪ I want you close, I want you ♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're typical ♪

♪ I want you, Fin, Fin, Fin, Fin ♪

- [CHEERING] - ♪ I won't treat you ♪

♪ Like you're typical ♪

♪♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're typical ♪

♪♪

♪ I won't treat you like you're typical ♪

♪ All I want to get is ♪

Oh, fuck.

♪ A little bit closer ♪

♪ All I want to know is ♪

♪ Can you come a little closer? ♪

[CROWD CHEERING]

Dani.

Dani, wait.

No, I-I can't. I just have get... I have to get out of here.

Okay, I know, but I just want to talk.

Just for a second.

I'm not fine, okay? I'm not fine at all.

I mean, I didn't think you were.

I can't be anywhere near here. I don't know what the fuck

- I was thinking. - Okay. Where's your purse?

I-I-I don't have, I don't have anything.

- Okay, just... - I could just feel

the air get sucked out of the room when I walked in.

- I mean, I feel like that had - Everyone's eyes

- something to do with me. - were on me.

Gigi, these are supposed to be my people.

Do you know what I mean? Like, it's...

Yes, and they still are.

Nothing's changed.

[GENTLE MUSIC]

♪♪

Can we get out of here?

- Absolutely. - Thank you.

I'm-a grab your purse, and we out.

Thank you.

[JOE TEX'S "THE LOVE YOU SAVE (MAY BE YOUR OWN)" PLAYING]

[QUIETLY] Oh, fuck.

♪ People, I've been misled ♪

♪ And I've been afraid ♪

♪ I've been hit in the head ♪

♪ And left for dead ♪

♪ I've been abused ♪

♪ And I've been accused ♪

♪ I been refused ♪

♪ A piece of bread ♪

♪ But I ain't never... ♪

I'm so happy.

- Yeah? - Yeah.

♪♪

[TOM] Tell you right now,

shit like that don't happen in straight bars.

[TOM AND ALICE CHUCKLE]

You're definitely seeing lesbian courtship 101.

Oh. Well, I can see the appeal.

♪ Find out what's wrong... ♪

You know, there's a lot that's appealing.

Sure. Of course. Yeah.

Absolutely.

♪ Because the love... ♪

- Do you want to dance with me? - Yeah.

You trying to make somebody jealous?

Your wing-man is here. Let's do it.

- Hey. - Hey.

- I want to dance with you. - Yeah. Of course. Yeah.

Not as friends.

♪ I've been given till sundown ♪

- Oh, shit. Yeah. R-Really? - Yeah?

- What do you think? - Yeah. Absolutely.

- You want to do it? - Yeah.

- Okay. - I just didn't think that you...

Well... Well, now you know what I think.

- Okay. - Come on.

I'm excited.

- You don't have to talk. - I'm gonna shut the fuck up.

♪ To smile and apologize ♪

♪ But I ain't never ♪

♪ In my life before ♪

♪ Seen so many love affairs ♪

♪ Go wrong as I do today ♪

♪ Ooh, so stop ♪

♪ Find out what's wrong ♪

♪ Get it right... ♪

Oh, okay.

Did a little ballroom dancing when I was a kid.

- You did? - Yeah, my parents made me.

♪ Because the love ♪

♪ You save today ♪

♪ Maybe it will ♪

- ♪ Be your own ♪ - Sorry about that.

[CHUCKLES]

[PAT BENATAR'S "HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT" PLAYING]

Oh.

Do you want to... Do you want to get out of here?

- Yup. - Let's go. Uh-huh.

♪♪

♪ Ooh... ♪

♪♪

Hey.

[TESS] Go away, Shane.

[SIGHS] Look, I-I will. I just...

I just wanted to come here and tell you that I...

I did have something to do with your breakup.

- Oh, my God. I fucking knew it. - Whoa, whoa, whoa. No, no, no.

No, no. No, no. Don't... No, no, it's not like that. Please.

Please what?

Tess...

Look, I met Cherie 17 years ago,

and it was... it was enchanting.

But she fucked me over.

Now, it wasn't entirely her fault.

I played a part in that. I was an absolute mess back then.

But she is an opportunist, Tess.

And when I saw you come in with her the other day,

I just saw a similar scenario just play out all over again,

except this time it was with you instead of me.

I can take care of myself.

I know you can.

And I'm sorry. I was wrong.

I should never have gotten in the way.

I just...

I-I care about you, Tess.

Fuck, and you know what? I...

I know I fucked you over with Lena,

and you have absolutely no reason to believe me,

but I swear to God to you that this is different.

And when Cherie came in the other night,

I-I... I told her. I...

What?

What did you tell her?

I told her to back off.

I told her to stop fucking touching my leg

and playing footsie under the table, and to leave you alone,

and she did.

Is that all you told her?

No.

Well, are you...

gonna tell me what else you said?

[SLOW, AMBIENT MUSIC]

♪♪

Yeah, I will. Sometime.

Soon.

- Yes. Yes. - Yeah. They're exciting.

- And Kai's work is really special. - Oh, yeah.

- Makes me think of Faith Ringgold. - Ringgold, yeah.

- Mm-hmm. - Low lighting in blue,

instead of white.

It's like, it's like the Internet collided

with this classic tradition of Black art.

I think she's really onto something.

- Oh, yeah. She's dope. - Mm.

Teaching her over these past few years

has given me so much life.

Well, I'll be keeping tabs on her.

And you won't be the only one.

But I'll be the only one

who came to her very first exhibition.

I hope that counts for something.

- You just don't quit, do you? - No.

Not when I believe in someone.

- It's not easy saying no to you. - [LAUGHS]

Oh, really? 'Cause you make it look easy.

Mm-hmm.

I can tell you what would make it...

impossible for me to say no.

Please.

If you offered something real.

Something concrete.

Not representation by a gallery,

but a real opportunity for me to show my work again...

I would find that hard to pass up.

[KING MALA'S "SHE CALLS ME DADDY" PLAYING]

Duly noted.

♪♪

♪ She's got you wrapped around her finger ♪

♪ You try to linger, but she's already on her way to mine... ♪

- [DISHES CLATTER] - [TOM] Yeah. Yeah.

- Mm-hmm. - Here's good.

All right, we're really gonna do this, right?

- We are fucking quite eager - Okay.

- to do this. - Yeah. Mm.

♪ She plays with the boys... ♪

Oh, do you have a...

- I do. - Yeah.

- Yes, ma'am, I do. - ♪ Little fucked up ♪

♪ But I think it's official ♪

♪ 'Cause she might be your girl ♪

♪ But she's calling me daddy ♪

♪ She's mine ♪

- [PANTING] - ♪ She wears a collar ♪

- ♪ With my name ♪ - [CHUCKLING]

♪ Secretive but not ashamed... ♪

Oh, wow.

Oh, fuck.

[MONICA ON LAPTOP] I've loved you since I was 11.

Shit won't go away.

[QUINCY] We haven't talked since college.

You wait two weeks before my wedding

to tell me something like that?

[CHUCKLES] I know.

I probably should've said it two weeks ago.

[QUINCY] You haven't changed.

[MONICA] I'll play you.

[QUINCY] What?

[MONICA] One game. One-on-one.

[QUINCY SCOFFS] For what?

- [MONICA] Your heart. - Your heart.

♪ Watch the girl get ♪

♪ What she likes ♪

[BOTH LAUGHING]

I-I can't believe you sang.

[SIGHS] Look, when Alice gets that way,

it's-it's horrifying.

- [LAUGHING] - And you can't say no,

'cause it's not worth the fight.

You just got to do it.

Hmm.

- You didn't sing. - Oh, yeah. 'Cause you ruined my night.

Fair.

Here now, though.

What?

You want me to get up and sing for you on my porch?

Yeah, why not?

Okay. You r... You ready for this?

- I'm 1,000% ready for that. - Okay. Here we go.

Up. No.

Come on, I'm not gonna sing for you. [LAUGHS]

Oh, that's a cop-out. Seriously?

What? No. I'm not d... Come on.

I'm not doing that.

- All right, I'm sorry. - [LAUGHS]

I don't want to push you.

I have to earn that.

[LAUGHS]

♪♪

♪ A minute on your lips ♪

♪ A lifetime in my memory ♪

♪ Each second in your... ♪

I'm sorry I brought Britt here.

[INHALES SHARPLY]

I'm sorry I made you quit your job at Alice's.

[FINLEY] I'm sorry I ruined your wedding.

[SOPHIE] Oh, God.

- That was bad. - Yeah. Mm-hmm.

♪ Your love, can you take me ♪

♪ Into your arms ♪

♪ Don't stop ♪

♪ A minute on your lips ♪

♪ A lifetime in my memory ♪

♪ Memory ♪

This is weird, right? This is, like, her bed?

- That's... - N-No, no.

It's... it's not. It's...

It can't be, anymore.

It's you and me.

- ♪ Chasing closure ♪ - Okay.

- ♪ Oh... ♪ - Hey.

What?

I'm sorry I didn't go to Kansas City with you.

What?

Yeah. Just...

I was gonna go, just got scared, and...

I promise I'm gonna try not to be so scared anymore, okay?

♪♪

Okay.

♪ A minute on your lips ♪

♪ A lifetime in my memory ♪

♪ Each second in your fingertips ♪

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

♪ Living out all our fantasies, fantasies ♪

♪ And I've been waiting for your love ♪

♪ Your love ♪

♪ Can you take me into your arms? ♪

- [MOANING] - ♪ Don't stop ♪

♪ A minute on your lips ♪

♪ A lifetime in my memory ♪

- ♪ Memory ♪ - [MOANING]

[PANTING]

Oh, thank you, God.

- ♪ Ooh ♪ - [MOANS]

[SIGHS]

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

- [DANI] For real. - [GIGI] Oh, my God.

I ate 11 scoops in two minutes.

- [SCOFFS] - I set the school record.

- You? - [LAUGHS] Yeah.

Jesus, woman.

Well, if my career doesn't work out,

I could always go back to the competitive eating.

Well, hold on. You want to go back and get some more?

- See where you're at? - No. Don't tempt me.

- I'll do it. - [LAUGHS] Come on.

[CHUCKLES]

- They've changed. - What?

I told you I'd let you know if my feelings for you changed,

and they have.

They have changed.

♪ Said you wanted to walk away ♪

♪ Stay friends, thought that it was final ♪

♪ Now you tell me your feelings have changed ♪

♪ Uh-uh, uh-uh, uh-uh-uh-uh-uh-uh ♪

♪ Never gave a warning ♪

♪ And then you went and dropped a bomb ♪

♪ All of my endorphins are running wild ♪

♪ You're 'bout to blow my rocks off ♪

♪ That's what I want ♪

♪ Ooh, you're a hotshot ♪

Wow. Okay, are you two... ?

Us? We just... hang out and stuff.

- Okay. - Sounds totally believable.

Is that Carrie?

I bumped into Bette Porter.

- And? - It did not go good.

For what it's worth, Gigi's really into you.

- Can I trust you? - I'd like to think so.

***

Hey.

- Synced and corrected by ChrisKe - ... for www.addic7ed.com ...