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1
00:00:01,820 --> 00:00:08,480
You realise it's a promotion?
You're now the spearhead of the new sales policy.
2
00:00:11,587 --> 00:00:14,346
HE GASPS
3
00:00:14,349 --> 00:00:19,108
Shouldn't I wear a badge?
L-plates, back and front(!)
4
00:00:19,113 --> 00:00:26,072
You haven't sold anything yet!
Some people are nervous about people coming to the door.
5
00:00:26,078 --> 00:00:30,997
Yes, if they see a face like that.
Haven't you got another expression?
6
00:00:31,002 --> 00:00:35,581
Lugging all this lot,
it could be sheer exhaustion.
7
00:00:35,585 --> 00:00:38,345
I like it.
It'll be an improvement.
8
00:00:39,648 --> 00:00:43,087
I can...
I can hardly lift this case up.
9
00:00:43,091 --> 00:00:45,910
I'm all wrongly balanced.
10
00:00:45,913 --> 00:00:48,752
Don't worry, lad.
11
00:00:48,755 --> 00:00:52,035
I've thought about that too.
12
00:01:04,547 --> 00:01:06,586
Salt of the earth.
13
00:01:06,588 --> 00:01:08,968
You could sell him anything.
14
00:01:43,135 --> 00:01:45,974
Life has so many perils.
15
00:01:45,978 --> 00:01:47,857
I married one.
16
00:01:47,859 --> 00:01:51,018
I often promised to marry one.
17
00:01:51,021 --> 00:01:57,981
It makes me grow cold to think
we could have been born in Bavaria and had to wear leather shorts.
18
00:01:59,648 --> 00:02:03,727
Hey, I'm getting tired.
Why don't we hitch a ride?
19
00:02:03,731 --> 00:02:06,330
That's idle, irresponsible
20
00:02:06,333 --> 00:02:08,592
and not a bad idea.
21
00:02:08,594 --> 00:02:11,273
Imagine what could happen to you,
22
00:02:11,276 --> 00:02:14,156
hitch-hiking in leather shorts!
23
00:02:21,424 --> 00:02:23,923
I bet he votes Tory.
24
00:02:23,926 --> 00:02:27,365
Would YOU stop
for somebody dressed like you?
25
00:02:27,368 --> 00:02:31,847
So I'm not a power dresser!
At least his knees are covered.
26
00:02:31,852 --> 00:02:37,931
They WERE at school -
in scabs and inkspots. Tha should have seen me elbow!
27
00:02:37,936 --> 00:02:41,455
I'll show you how to get a lift.
I'm not hiding!
28
00:02:41,459 --> 00:02:46,518
There's another way.
You play upon people's curiosity.
29
00:02:46,523 --> 00:02:51,682
The thing about human nature is,
everybody's a nosey parker.
30
00:02:51,686 --> 00:02:58,545
The next vehicle that comes, we
ignore it. We pretend we're looking at something very interesting.
31
00:02:58,552 --> 00:03:04,912
The chances are, the bloke'll stop
and come for an eyeball. Then we've got him!
32
00:03:12,202 --> 00:03:14,782
LOUD ROCK MUSIC
33
00:03:22,309 --> 00:03:26,068
HE SWITCHES MUSIC OFF
34
00:03:26,072 --> 00:03:30,051
Found something?
Aye, thee. We need a lift.
35
00:03:30,055 --> 00:03:32,794
OK. I just want to look first.
36
00:03:32,797 --> 00:03:37,676
I told you - nosey parkers. I
thought Edie usually did it for him.
37
00:03:37,681 --> 00:03:40,241
I try to keep me hand in.
38
00:03:41,804 --> 00:03:47,523
He's worse than Nora Batty.
More feminine. Only in this light.
39
00:03:47,528 --> 00:03:50,467
What were you looking at?
40
00:03:50,470 --> 00:03:55,289
There's nothing. It was a ploy.
We were just being sneaky.
41
00:03:55,294 --> 00:03:58,273
And tha fell for it!
42
00:03:58,276 --> 00:04:03,215
You're hiding it from me, aren't
you? You don't want me to know.
43
00:04:03,220 --> 00:04:09,460
Why don't you want me to know?
There's nothing there. You're keeping it to yourselves.
44
00:04:10,665 --> 00:04:13,744
Ah! Is that it down there?
45
00:04:13,748 --> 00:04:16,548
Down where? There.
46
00:04:34,843 --> 00:04:36,922
Didn't he marry twice?
47
00:04:36,925 --> 00:04:39,944
Twice - and several near misses.
48
00:04:39,947 --> 00:04:45,166
SHE's been married before.
I helped with the wedding reception.
49
00:04:45,171 --> 00:04:50,330
You had a job to tell who belonged
to who and THEY didn't seem too sure.
50
00:04:50,335 --> 00:04:55,594
I hope they have it all written down
somewhere, in case of accidents.
51
00:04:55,599 --> 00:04:59,638
And HE seemed more interested
in the bridesmaid.
52
00:04:59,642 --> 00:05:03,101
Always had a handkerchief
in his top pocket.
53
00:05:03,104 --> 00:05:08,283
It's a bad sign. Good men have
better uses for their handkerchiefs.
54
00:05:08,288 --> 00:05:13,647
And you could never
wash the stains out! No matter how much you boiled 'em.
55
00:05:13,652 --> 00:05:17,551
Still, better than finding them
smelling of perfume.
56
00:05:17,555 --> 00:05:21,894
If they start taking care
of their hankies, you're in trouble.
57
00:05:21,898 --> 00:05:27,777
Well, he married her.
It wouldn't be long before he ran out of handkerchiefs.
58
00:05:27,783 --> 00:05:32,722
She didn't look
much of a washer to me. Not with fingernails like that.
59
00:05:32,726 --> 00:05:37,346
The only thing she was equipped for
was poking somebody's eye out!
60
00:05:42,634 --> 00:05:44,614
Come in, why don't you(?)
61
00:05:47,938 --> 00:05:52,237
Where does he think he's going
with that lot? Australia?
62
00:05:52,241 --> 00:05:55,120
I'm selling door-to-door.
63
00:05:55,123 --> 00:05:57,082
I don't suppose you ladies
would be interested...
64
00:05:57,085 --> 00:06:00,364
You're right. We're not.
65
00:06:00,367 --> 00:06:03,486
Sit down
and stop making such a clatter.
66
00:06:03,489 --> 00:06:08,208
I haven't time to sit down.
I'm working for Hitler's sister.
67
00:06:08,213 --> 00:06:13,493
I just wondered if you ladies
would be interested in...
68
00:06:19,021 --> 00:06:25,121
Ohh... O-Of course, it's wonderful
exercise for toning up the muscles.
69
00:06:26,667 --> 00:06:29,706
By the time I get the heart attack,
70
00:06:29,709 --> 00:06:32,649
I'm going to be really fit.
71
00:06:45,461 --> 00:06:49,880
Emigrating, Smiler?
Was it something we said?
72
00:06:49,884 --> 00:06:52,663
I'm selling, door-to-door.
73
00:06:52,666 --> 00:06:56,345
To be honest,
it doesn't look as interesting
74
00:06:56,349 --> 00:06:59,708
as something like drink
or funny women.
75
00:06:59,711 --> 00:07:01,150
It's not.
76
00:07:01,152 --> 00:07:04,151
You mean, he knows?
77
00:07:04,154 --> 00:07:07,053
I've had my share of funny women!
78
00:07:07,057 --> 00:07:09,756
Is there any other kind?
79
00:07:09,759 --> 00:07:13,538
Stick with me, Norm.
I'll show thee the ropes.
80
00:07:13,541 --> 00:07:17,760
Your rope is
holding up your trousers. We hope!
81
00:07:17,765 --> 00:07:22,284
They look heavy, Smiler.
What are you doing with that lot?
82
00:07:22,288 --> 00:07:24,967
Nothing. Nobody wants to buy.
83
00:07:24,970 --> 00:07:29,469
Oh, give him a lift before he loses
that cheerful expression(!)
84
00:07:29,473 --> 00:07:33,072
We'll give you a lift
to t' next street.
85
00:07:33,076 --> 00:07:35,536
Oh-h!
86
00:07:41,482 --> 00:07:44,822
What's tha got in there?
Every bloomin' thing.
87
00:07:47,407 --> 00:07:48,987
Oww!
88
00:07:52,771 --> 00:07:56,491
Morris dancers!
Where's the bells, lad?
89
00:07:59,175 --> 00:08:01,155
Bells to you!
90
00:08:03,178 --> 00:08:08,777
A wheelchair? Not only do I have one,
but I can do you a very good price.
91
00:08:08,783 --> 00:08:14,162
It's for Smiler. He's had
an accident - his handle fell off.
92
00:08:14,167 --> 00:08:16,946
A heavy suitcase fell on his foot.
93
00:08:16,949 --> 00:08:20,429
Oh, my goodness!
Is the suitcase all right?
94
00:08:22,012 --> 00:08:26,971
The suitcases are fine!
Wesley's looking after them. Oh.
95
00:08:26,976 --> 00:08:32,415
Mm, our first concern must be Smiler.
Did he have a lot of money on him?
96
00:08:32,420 --> 00:08:37,419
I don't think he'd sold anything.
Oh, dear! It's worse than I thought.
97
00:08:37,424 --> 00:08:42,363
Where's Smiler now? In Casualty. We
want the wheelchair to get him home.
98
00:08:42,368 --> 00:08:47,187
Home? Bring him here! He's meant
to be working. He's hurt his foot!
99
00:08:47,191 --> 00:08:50,210
Badly bruised, by the noise he made.
100
00:08:50,213 --> 00:08:53,892
We've always thought
he was a quiet person.
101
00:08:53,896 --> 00:08:59,036
One foot! Huh! His foot can take the
day off. I want the rest of him here.
102
00:09:00,081 --> 00:09:01,820
Nice, isn't it?
103
00:09:01,822 --> 00:09:04,858
I was only looking.
104
00:09:11,986 --> 00:09:15,445
The simple disguises
are the best.
105
00:09:15,448 --> 00:09:18,867
Not the most exciting,
just the best.
106
00:09:18,871 --> 00:09:23,810
What's more innocent than helping
someone like me cross the road?
107
00:09:23,814 --> 00:09:26,873
This is the third time, Howard!
108
00:09:26,877 --> 00:09:30,976
Will we ever be able to meet
under normal circumstances?
109
00:09:30,980 --> 00:09:33,559
What, and lose half the fun?
110
00:09:33,562 --> 00:09:38,321
Crossing the road is not all a girl
thinks of when she thinks of fun.
111
00:09:38,325 --> 00:09:41,504
Well, we needn't JUST cross the road.
112
00:09:41,508 --> 00:09:44,907
I mean, you could take me
for a walk sometimes.
113
00:09:44,910 --> 00:09:47,809
It would be a simple act of kindness.
114
00:09:47,812 --> 00:09:52,471
It'd be a long walk, with you
tapping your stick all the time.
115
00:09:52,476 --> 00:09:54,996
I've got to make it look real!
116
00:09:57,199 --> 00:10:00,739
Ah, you want to cross the road?
Come on.
117
00:10:03,564 --> 00:10:06,104
TOOT!
118
00:10:12,130 --> 00:10:14,110
Fourth time!
119
00:10:24,800 --> 00:10:29,779
Will somebody tell me why we're all
walking when there's a spare chair?
120
00:10:29,784 --> 00:10:32,703
I suppose you want us to push you?
121
00:10:32,706 --> 00:10:37,545
That's very kind, Truly.
Tha's a good lad, for an ex-copper.
122
00:10:37,549 --> 00:10:42,928
People will think it's our fault
he's in that condition.
123
00:10:42,933 --> 00:10:48,313
Say I've neglected meself
on account of pining for Nora Batty.
124
00:10:49,879 --> 00:10:53,099
Hey up, what's this I'm sitting on?
125
00:10:54,202 --> 00:10:57,521
I don't know
what tha bought this for, Norm.
126
00:10:57,524 --> 00:11:00,643
You saw. It was a medical emergency.
127
00:11:00,647 --> 00:11:05,986
I thought she'd suspend her
sales activity during the crisis.
128
00:11:05,991 --> 00:11:09,610
Maybe she did.
She only sold you ONE ornament!
129
00:11:09,613 --> 00:11:11,812
Hey up!
130
00:11:11,815 --> 00:11:15,755
Look who's coming -
Nora Batty, my own true love!
131
00:11:17,099 --> 00:11:21,199
The mop-and-duster set's
Joan Collins!
132
00:11:22,243 --> 00:11:24,562
Leave the talking to me.
133
00:11:24,564 --> 00:11:28,944
Ask if she wants to buy
an attractive ornament.
134
00:11:31,309 --> 00:11:35,768
Whatever's the matter?
How long's he been in a chair?
135
00:11:35,773 --> 00:11:40,372
Is that Nora?
I thought I heard Nora.
136
00:11:40,376 --> 00:11:44,096
Oh, Lord!
I'm beginning to hear things now!
137
00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:49,959
No, you're not, love. It's me.
138
00:11:49,963 --> 00:11:52,822
How are you feeling?
139
00:11:52,825 --> 00:11:56,584
It is! It's Nora.
140
00:11:56,588 --> 00:12:01,947
Oh, I'm so glad you've come, love,
whilst there's still time.
141
00:12:01,952 --> 00:12:04,811
When did it happen, love?
142
00:12:04,814 --> 00:12:08,834
They say...it could happen
at any minute.
143
00:12:13,241 --> 00:12:17,681
See, I told thee! Oh,
take him away! He wants locking up!
144
00:12:21,167 --> 00:12:25,407
I enjoyed that! A nibble a day
keeps the doctor away.
145
00:12:29,213 --> 00:12:32,612
I'd sooner kiss
the Streatham Strangler.
146
00:12:32,615 --> 00:12:34,415
Again?
147
00:12:42,362 --> 00:12:47,941
Ee, you look flustered.
I've been assaulted by a man in a wheelchair.
148
00:12:47,947 --> 00:12:51,846
A wheelchair?!
Oh, they never give up, do they?
149
00:12:51,849 --> 00:12:56,908
It was him next door.
What was he doing in a wheelchair?
150
00:12:56,913 --> 00:13:02,872
He lures people into feeling sorry
for him, and then he strikes!
151
00:13:02,878 --> 00:13:07,777
Did you hit him?
How can you hit anybody in a wheelchair?
152
00:13:07,781 --> 00:13:10,220
Oh, the crafty devil!
153
00:13:10,223 --> 00:13:13,663
Wait till I catch him
on his feet again!
154
00:13:19,670 --> 00:13:23,330
ENGINE WHINES
155
00:13:27,116 --> 00:13:31,856
He's been tampering with it - it
never used to climb on THIS pavement.
156
00:13:36,523 --> 00:13:39,382
You can't leave that there.
157
00:13:39,385 --> 00:13:44,124
I didn't leave it here.
It chose to come here itself.
158
00:13:44,128 --> 00:13:47,228
You'll have to move it...NOW!
159
00:13:48,632 --> 00:13:52,592
Cyril Gridley! You're
Mavis Gridley's boy, aren't you?
160
00:13:53,615 --> 00:13:56,514
You'll have to move it, Mrs Pegden.
161
00:13:56,518 --> 00:14:01,437
Is that how to speak to your elders?
Mavis didn't bring you up like that.
162
00:14:01,441 --> 00:14:04,420
..Please, Mrs Pegden.
163
00:14:04,423 --> 00:14:08,002
I remember you
getting your bottom powdered, lad,
164
00:14:08,006 --> 00:14:11,905
and I could see a bigger smile then
than I can now!
165
00:14:11,909 --> 00:14:16,328
Could I move the vehicle for you,
Mrs Pegden?
166
00:14:16,332 --> 00:14:21,171
It's not easy to drive.
My husband faffs about with it.
167
00:14:21,176 --> 00:14:24,376
Why don't we give it a try?
168
00:14:25,459 --> 00:14:30,158
Right, I want the Co-op first,
then take me to my little butcher's.
169
00:14:30,163 --> 00:14:32,982
I'm on duty, Mrs Pegden!
170
00:14:32,985 --> 00:14:37,184
Does your mother know
how argumentative you've become?
171
00:14:37,188 --> 00:14:41,628
Mind the next corner!
She usually goes on the pavement.
172
00:14:44,693 --> 00:14:46,972
SMILER GROANS
173
00:14:46,975 --> 00:14:50,274
It's just a bruise! It's agony.
174
00:14:50,278 --> 00:14:54,097
Agony suits you.
It'll never find a better fit.
175
00:14:54,100 --> 00:14:57,159
Be careful. Don't knock it.
176
00:14:57,163 --> 00:15:00,982
Stop moaning!
It's us what's doing the pushing.
177
00:15:00,986 --> 00:15:04,685
And me with a bad back I was saving
for Nora Batty.
178
00:15:04,688 --> 00:15:08,147
I thought SHE'd got a bad back.
Front. Sorry.
179
00:15:08,151 --> 00:15:09,390
What's wrong with her front?
180
00:15:09,392 --> 00:15:12,431
It looks better from the back.
181
00:15:12,434 --> 00:15:14,933
Is he in pain?
182
00:15:14,936 --> 00:15:18,496
It's that -
he has something on his foot.
183
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,739
Ow, ow, ow!
184
00:15:25,484 --> 00:15:27,944
HORNS BLARE
185
00:15:36,372 --> 00:15:39,091
Ouch! Ow! Ow! Ow!
186
00:15:39,094 --> 00:15:41,873
They said I hadn't to knock it!
187
00:15:41,876 --> 00:15:45,715
Tha's not - WE are.
Suppose it goes septic?
188
00:15:45,719 --> 00:15:50,458
That reminds me - I must call
the former Mrs Truelove.
189
00:15:50,462 --> 00:15:53,101
Can you die from a bruised foot?
190
00:15:53,104 --> 00:15:57,263
I give you
no more than about 30 years, Smiler.
191
00:15:57,267 --> 00:16:00,706
I knew it. I'm terminal.
192
00:16:00,710 --> 00:16:02,789
This man needs cheering up.
193
00:16:02,792 --> 00:16:06,271
Fancy a drink, Smiler? Not really.
194
00:16:06,274 --> 00:16:09,854
Of course, he could be lying.
..Let me do it.
195
00:16:11,758 --> 00:16:14,477
Oh...Oh...
196
00:16:14,480 --> 00:16:15,980
Oh!
197
00:16:17,963 --> 00:16:20,623
CRASH!
Oww!
198
00:16:21,966 --> 00:16:24,845
Come on then, up. That's the stuff.
199
00:16:24,848 --> 00:16:29,167
If he's going to be rowdy,
I don't want him in here.
200
00:16:29,171 --> 00:16:31,950
We'll keep him quiet.
201
00:16:31,953 --> 00:16:35,672
What happened to him?
Professional wrestler.
202
00:16:35,676 --> 00:16:39,615
At his age? He uses make-up.
203
00:16:39,619 --> 00:16:42,198
I don't use make-up!
204
00:16:42,201 --> 00:16:47,120
He won't admit it in case it leads
to problems in the changing rooms.
205
00:16:47,125 --> 00:16:48,744
What name does he wrestle under?
206
00:16:48,746 --> 00:16:52,486
Big Sylvia - uses too much make-up.
207
00:16:53,770 --> 00:16:56,489
They keep banging me into walls.
208
00:16:56,492 --> 00:17:02,532
He wants to become impervious to
pain. He has a long way to go, then.
209
00:17:04,598 --> 00:17:07,978
Hey up! There's Barry.
210
00:17:08,981 --> 00:17:11,301
Ohh! Getting there, Smiler!
211
00:17:15,145 --> 00:17:18,184
Penny for 'em, Barry.
212
00:17:18,188 --> 00:17:21,007
I think I'm executive material.
213
00:17:21,010 --> 00:17:26,609
Ah, well, we'd know better if we
saw thee taking important decisions,
214
00:17:26,614 --> 00:17:29,453
like...buying the next round.
215
00:17:29,456 --> 00:17:34,155
Consider it done.
That's good enough for me.
216
00:17:34,160 --> 00:17:38,299
No question.
This lad is executive material.
217
00:17:38,303 --> 00:17:42,862
Landlord! Give this man a whisky.
And we'll have the same.
218
00:17:42,866 --> 00:17:44,365
Who's paying?
219
00:17:44,367 --> 00:17:49,386
Oh, that's kind of you, Smiler.
You can buy the round after Barry.
220
00:17:49,391 --> 00:17:50,270
Oh...
221
00:17:50,272 --> 00:17:52,272
Oh! Ow!
222
00:17:56,957 --> 00:17:58,236
What's wrong with his foot?
223
00:17:58,238 --> 00:18:02,218
He keeps banging it on walls.
224
00:18:09,566 --> 00:18:13,305
Hello, Mavis. Come in.
No, I can't stop.
225
00:18:13,309 --> 00:18:18,428
But I just had to come and say
how sorry I am about your Howard.
226
00:18:18,433 --> 00:18:22,692
Well, I often feel the same,
but how come you feel like that?
227
00:18:22,696 --> 00:18:27,075
Mrs Bradbury said she saw him
walking with a white stick.
228
00:18:27,079 --> 00:18:30,638
A white stick?
It must have been very sudden.
229
00:18:30,642 --> 00:18:36,581
Very. Mrs Bradbury said he had
what looked like his nurse with him.
230
00:18:36,586 --> 00:18:39,185
..Oh!
231
00:18:39,188 --> 00:18:44,467
Oh, he did, did he? Yes,
but she didn't look like a nurse.
232
00:18:44,472 --> 00:18:47,891
I suppose
she's just some kind volunteer.
233
00:18:47,895 --> 00:18:50,775
Oh, she's a volunteer, all right.
234
00:18:51,878 --> 00:18:55,317
Just like one of them
old-time fire horses.
235
00:18:55,320 --> 00:18:57,999
Can't wait to get between the shafts.
236
00:18:58,002 --> 00:19:02,121
Anyhow, I thought I'd just say
how sorry we all are.
237
00:19:02,125 --> 00:19:04,824
Not as sorry as he'll be. What?
238
00:19:04,827 --> 00:19:07,346
That he missed you, Mavis.
239
00:19:07,349 --> 00:19:10,808
Tell him I hope
he's feeling better soon.
240
00:19:10,812 --> 00:19:13,811
Has he had an accident? Not yet.
241
00:19:13,814 --> 00:19:16,354
Thank you, Mavis.
242
00:19:26,463 --> 00:19:31,902
I don't ask a lot. All I ask is that
you fit where you're supposed to fit.
243
00:19:31,907 --> 00:19:34,646
Is that too much to ask?
244
00:19:34,649 --> 00:19:38,288
Do we have to have this struggle
every time?
245
00:19:38,292 --> 00:19:40,711
Is it something I said?
246
00:19:40,714 --> 00:19:43,414
Is it because you're Japanese?
247
00:19:48,300 --> 00:19:50,579
Has our Barry been drinking?
248
00:19:50,581 --> 00:19:53,820
How can tha tell from 20yds away?
249
00:19:53,824 --> 00:19:58,503
How's the foot, Smiler?
Terrible. They keep running me into walls.
250
00:19:58,507 --> 00:20:02,307
No, we only run him into walls
occasionally.
251
00:20:03,331 --> 00:20:07,570
The problem is, Wesley,
he's not happy with his wheelchair.
252
00:20:07,574 --> 00:20:10,253
The problem is he's not happy.
253
00:20:10,256 --> 00:20:14,475
He gets full marks for depression,
don't you, Smiler?
254
00:20:14,479 --> 00:20:18,518
Have you EVER been happy?
When I was in love.
255
00:20:18,522 --> 00:20:23,021
Then she spoiled it by going
and getting married. Who to?
256
00:20:23,025 --> 00:20:25,205
To me.
257
00:20:28,550 --> 00:20:30,409
Hold this.
258
00:20:30,411 --> 00:20:34,650
I don't want to get greasy.
I'm hoping to ask for promotion.
259
00:20:34,654 --> 00:20:38,014
You've got it, lad.
I hereby promote you.
260
00:20:39,057 --> 00:20:42,036
Careful!
Its dimensions are critical.
261
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:44,600
I know the feeling.
262
00:20:45,782 --> 00:20:50,501
Will Barry still be speaking to us,
now he's into executive stress?
263
00:20:50,506 --> 00:20:53,845
You never know
when they rise as rapidly as that.
264
00:20:53,848 --> 00:20:57,127
He looks like the same old Barry...
265
00:20:57,131 --> 00:20:59,631
with dirtier hands.
266
00:21:02,054 --> 00:21:04,833
Why's he walking with a white stick?
267
00:21:04,837 --> 00:21:08,496
First, he says he's practising
in case his eyesight fails.
268
00:21:08,499 --> 00:21:11,578
IS it failing?
Not as fast as his brain.
269
00:21:11,582 --> 00:21:17,181
Then he says "he must have picked it
up without noticing it were white."
270
00:21:17,186 --> 00:21:19,305
Is that possible?
271
00:21:19,307 --> 00:21:22,286
It is when you see what he picks up.
272
00:21:22,290 --> 00:21:26,669
With all the practice,
you'd think they'd lie better.
273
00:21:26,673 --> 00:21:31,052
I think it's Nature's way
of keeping women informed.
274
00:21:31,056 --> 00:21:36,075
I always know when Wesley's
hiding something - he smiles a lot.
275
00:21:36,080 --> 00:21:39,039
It's a bad sign when they smile.
276
00:21:39,042 --> 00:21:42,801
You can see "guilty"
written across their teeth.
277
00:21:42,805 --> 00:21:49,004
It's only when they're looking
miserable, you know everything's as it should be.
278
00:21:49,009 --> 00:21:52,808
What about enjoyment, excitement?
279
00:21:52,812 --> 00:21:55,771
What about drinking your coffee?
280
00:21:55,774 --> 00:21:58,333
Oh, Mother!
281
00:21:58,336 --> 00:22:02,595
I hope your Barry's
not smiling a lot. Not at the moment.
282
00:22:02,600 --> 00:22:05,979
He's worried
about asking for promotion.
283
00:22:05,982 --> 00:22:12,361
Men are no good at that.
You'll have to do it for him. He wouldn't let me do that!
284
00:22:12,367 --> 00:22:17,106
I did it for your father. He
wouldn't have got a raise otherwise.
285
00:22:17,110 --> 00:22:20,729
Didn't the other men laugh at him?
They did at first.
286
00:22:20,733 --> 00:22:25,312
But when they saw all his raises,
they wanted me to do it for them.
287
00:22:25,316 --> 00:22:30,275
- You must draw the line somewhere.
- They need a woman behind 'em.
288
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:33,779
They need a whack with a white stick,
some of 'em.
289
00:22:33,783 --> 00:22:37,302
When you have your own business,
you never get a rise.
290
00:22:37,305 --> 00:22:40,044
You can
put the price of buns up.
291
00:22:40,047 --> 00:22:42,806
You should hear the complaints!
292
00:22:42,809 --> 00:22:44,348
From who?
293
00:22:44,351 --> 00:22:47,230
Well, you, for a start.
294
00:22:47,233 --> 00:22:52,132
Well...when you've brought the right
change, it comes as a shock!
295
00:22:52,136 --> 00:22:57,375
How did you get an appointment
with me father's boss? You don't need an appointment!
296
00:22:57,380 --> 00:23:03,860
You just catch him in the street.
When they're off their own ground, they're not half so cocky.
297
00:23:10,390 --> 00:23:12,509
There you go, lad.
298
00:23:12,512 --> 00:23:15,411
Your foot's now got 100% protection.
299
00:23:15,414 --> 00:23:18,113
They can't run it into any walls.
300
00:23:18,116 --> 00:23:20,775
Where can I wash me hands?
301
00:23:20,778 --> 00:23:24,157
Where does tha think tha is?
The hairdressers?
302
00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:27,439
You need your hands petal-soft
for promotion, Barry.
303
00:23:27,443 --> 00:23:31,383
We in the Force had to handle
all kinds of unpleasant secretions.
304
00:23:32,446 --> 00:23:35,785
I hope he never has to make me
a sandwich.
305
00:23:35,789 --> 00:23:39,328
Will it work?
Of course it'll work!
306
00:23:39,332 --> 00:23:42,491
It's got an impact absorber.
307
00:23:42,494 --> 00:23:44,953
An impact absorber!
308
00:23:44,956 --> 00:23:49,815
Wow! It's been worth bruising
your foot for. No, it hasn't.
309
00:23:49,819 --> 00:23:53,399
We've just got to find
somewhere to test it.
310
00:24:42,278 --> 00:24:46,357
This is the pub
where he caused all the trouble.
311
00:24:46,361 --> 00:24:50,580
YOU caused all the trouble,
by running me into things.
312
00:24:50,585 --> 00:24:53,144
All we bumped into was Barry.
313
00:24:53,147 --> 00:24:57,186
Do I have to buy more whiskies?
Good offer. We accept.
314
00:24:57,190 --> 00:25:00,009
Couldn't I stay here and be tested?
315
00:25:00,012 --> 00:25:04,871
No, no, no. We've got to prove it
to you, give you some confidence.
316
00:25:04,875 --> 00:25:11,354
Now, Wesley's going to run you
straight at the door. It won't touch your foot.
317
00:25:11,360 --> 00:25:14,699
He's going to run me at the door?
318
00:25:14,703 --> 00:25:16,982
Don't worry, Smiler.
319
00:25:16,984 --> 00:25:20,343
Anything happens,
I'll take care of your whisky.
320
00:25:20,347 --> 00:25:23,726
It'll work.
I feel confident.
321
00:25:23,729 --> 00:25:27,968
Supposing it don't work?
That's the point of testing it.
322
00:25:27,972 --> 00:25:31,291
If it doesn't work,
I'll make adjustments.
323
00:25:31,295 --> 00:25:33,994
What about the pain and suffering?
324
00:25:33,997 --> 00:25:37,436
Make a small donation
to me engine fund.
325
00:25:37,440 --> 00:25:40,239
I mean MY pain and suffering.
326
00:25:40,242 --> 00:25:43,722
Let's see how easy it is
to open the door.
327
00:25:55,093 --> 00:25:56,812
Argh!
328
00:25:56,814 --> 00:25:59,414
GLASS SHATTERS
329
00:26:00,737 --> 00:26:04,156
Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!
330
00:26:04,159 --> 00:26:05,939
Ouch!
331
00:26:19,171 --> 00:26:25,790
How come I'm wheeling you?
If he won't use it, somebody else might as well have a ride.
332
00:26:25,796 --> 00:26:30,615
Will being thrown out of a pub ruin
my chances of promotion? Definitely.
333
00:26:30,619 --> 00:26:34,618
Oh, no! Stone dead, Barry.
334
00:26:34,622 --> 00:26:36,341
Ahh!
335
00:26:36,343 --> 00:26:40,062
Leave me! LEAVE ME!
I'll get the bus home.
336
00:26:40,066 --> 00:26:42,245
Anywhere'll be safer than with you.
337
00:26:42,248 --> 00:26:44,048
TOOT!
338
00:26:48,693 --> 00:26:51,733
What do you think you're doing?!
339
00:26:52,876 --> 00:26:54,656
Hey!
340
00:26:55,718 --> 00:26:58,137
He-e-elp!
341
00:26:58,140 --> 00:27:00,559
Stop him, Barry! Me?
342
00:27:00,561 --> 00:27:03,501
You're the youngest.
Get after him.
343
00:27:08,087 --> 00:27:12,047
Dramatic rescue -
the quickest way to promotion.
344
00:27:15,332 --> 00:27:17,911
Ar-rgh-h-h!
345
00:27:17,914 --> 00:27:22,353
I'm sure he's one of
your loyalest employees, Mr Marsden.
346
00:27:22,358 --> 00:27:25,657
We all think very highly of Barry.
347
00:27:25,660 --> 00:27:30,419
He carries himself in a sober
manner, which we all appreciate.
348
00:27:30,424 --> 00:27:31,543
Help!
349
00:27:31,544 --> 00:27:33,663
Get out of the way!
350
00:27:33,666 --> 00:27:36,425
Get out of the way!
351
00:27:36,428 --> 00:27:39,088
Not like some people!
352
00:27:45,295 --> 00:27:47,214
Barry!
353
00:27:47,216 --> 00:27:51,475
They say there's new optimism
in the housing market, Mr Marsden!
354
00:27:51,479 --> 00:27:54,318
Barry...!
355
00:27:54,321 --> 00:27:57,740
Use your bumper! Run it into t' wall.
356
00:27:57,744 --> 00:28:01,424
Right, Barry!
And good luck with the promotion!
357
00:28:46,864 --> 00:28:50,064
Subtitles by BBC - 1999
358
00:28:50,114 --> 00:28:54,664
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