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1
00:00:10,700 --> 00:00:16,299
Isn't there something you could do
instead of watching people work?
2
00:00:16,306 --> 00:00:20,625
The truth is, lass,
there's nothing I'd rather do.
3
00:00:20,631 --> 00:00:24,610
What's so fascinating
about somebody hanging out washing?
4
00:00:24,616 --> 00:00:27,135
Ah, tha's not seeing it from here!
5
00:00:27,139 --> 00:00:32,498
I'm enchanted with every ripple
of the pinny. Don't start!
6
00:00:32,505 --> 00:00:35,244
Some people like watching ballet -
7
00:00:35,248 --> 00:00:40,687
I like to watch thee hanging out
the washing. It's embarrassing.
8
00:00:40,694 --> 00:00:45,713
I always see thee as the Margot
Fonteyn of the clothes line.
9
00:00:45,720 --> 00:00:49,539
I see thee reaching up
on tha little toes,
10
00:00:49,544 --> 00:00:54,183
and I think, "Swan Lake, 1...
11
00:00:54,189 --> 00:00:56,608
"Nora Batty, 2."
12
00:00:56,612 --> 00:01:00,271
You'll get some clothes prop
in a minute!
13
00:01:00,276 --> 00:01:06,655
Nay, lass.
We've been neighbours long enough to earn a few privileges.
14
00:01:06,663 --> 00:01:11,502
If we were Italian, we'd have been
together ages ago. I'm not Italian!
15
00:01:11,509 --> 00:01:17,048
Not even enough to cover me
moving in, say, for weekends?
16
00:01:17,055 --> 00:01:18,515
Oh!
17
00:02:25,612 --> 00:02:29,651
Hello!
There's a fluffy duster at my door.
18
00:02:29,657 --> 00:02:33,737
I'm being visited
by a fluffy duster.
19
00:02:35,443 --> 00:02:40,522
It's amazing what you can find
at the end of a feather duster!
20
00:02:40,529 --> 00:02:43,229
You noticed it?
21
00:02:49,820 --> 00:02:53,439
Well, are you going to tell me?
Tell you what?
22
00:02:53,444 --> 00:02:59,723
What is the significance
of the fluffy duster? I thought it could be our signal.
23
00:02:59,731 --> 00:03:02,590
Our signal, Howard?
24
00:03:02,594 --> 00:03:05,753
Yours and mine? Yes! Aw!
25
00:03:05,757 --> 00:03:08,416
Why do we need a signal, Howard?
26
00:03:08,420 --> 00:03:14,779
It occurred to me that if I wanted
to speak to you confidentially... I don't like it already.
27
00:03:14,788 --> 00:03:19,927
..instead of knocking or ringing
bells that some people might hear,
28
00:03:19,933 --> 00:03:27,632
I thought if I put this through
your letter box, it could be our signal that I wanted to speak.
29
00:03:27,642 --> 00:03:34,541
And then what? When you saw
the signal, you could have the door open, just off the latch,
30
00:03:34,550 --> 00:03:40,189
and I could slip in silently. I'm
not taking any messages to Marina!
31
00:03:40,196 --> 00:03:44,935
I don't see why you should think
it's always going to be that.
32
00:03:44,942 --> 00:03:50,041
It could be anything I wanted to
discuss with you confidentially.
33
00:03:50,047 --> 00:03:53,686
Like what?
Well, philosophy, politics...
34
00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:56,811
life's big questions. I know...
35
00:03:56,815 --> 00:04:01,634
Questions like, "What is it you
want me to take to Marina?" This.
36
00:04:01,641 --> 00:04:03,301
Out!
37
00:04:22,444 --> 00:04:28,323
He looks a bit furtive, shifty-eyed.
I'd have the cuffs on him in no time.
38
00:04:28,331 --> 00:04:33,411
He looks innocent enough to me.
Which I always think is suspicious.
39
00:04:36,340 --> 00:04:40,719
He just looks a bit miserable.
I'm not surprised -
40
00:04:40,725 --> 00:04:43,465
there's no bus until this afternoon.
41
00:04:45,750 --> 00:04:52,929
Probably fleeing the scene of some
criminal activity. Fleeing? When there's no bus till this afternoon?
42
00:04:52,938 --> 00:04:57,738
Some fleeing! They're cunning. They
do it to throw you off the scent.
43
00:05:02,109 --> 00:05:06,428
No use waiting there.
There's no bus till this afternoon.
44
00:05:06,434 --> 00:05:08,633
Typical!
45
00:05:08,636 --> 00:05:12,675
Ask him where he was
on the night of the 14th. Why?
46
00:05:12,681 --> 00:05:17,480
I find it's a good way
to start a conversation.
47
00:05:17,486 --> 00:05:22,165
Is tha going far?
Far? I'm going all the way.
48
00:05:22,171 --> 00:05:24,490
End of the line.
49
00:05:24,494 --> 00:05:28,233
Manchester?
Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
50
00:05:28,238 --> 00:05:33,197
Somewhere up the moors. I'm looking
for the bleakest spot around,
51
00:05:33,204 --> 00:05:37,023
somewhere totally without charm
or warmth.
52
00:05:37,028 --> 00:05:39,527
You want HIS place!
53
00:05:39,531 --> 00:05:43,290
He means outdoors! Oh? ..Outdoors?
54
00:05:43,295 --> 00:05:48,874
I don't want any of your tourist
spots - I mean really bleak.
55
00:05:48,882 --> 00:05:52,401
Not having a good day, are thee,
lad?
56
00:05:52,405 --> 00:05:55,084
The wife's left me.
57
00:05:55,089 --> 00:05:59,268
Oh, well,
as long as it's nothing serious...
58
00:05:59,273 --> 00:06:01,773
Ask him his name.
59
00:06:05,420 --> 00:06:07,579
Name?
60
00:06:07,583 --> 00:06:12,162
You don't have to write it down!
Sorry. Force of habit.
61
00:06:12,168 --> 00:06:14,828
What's tha name, old lad? It's Lucy.
62
00:06:18,635 --> 00:06:23,494
I don't think we should be standing
here talking to a man called Lucy.
63
00:06:23,501 --> 00:06:26,160
It may not be as bad as you think.
64
00:06:26,164 --> 00:06:30,863
It might be his second name. What's
your first name? Not Sylvia, I hope!
65
00:06:30,869 --> 00:06:32,428
Edward.
66
00:06:32,431 --> 00:06:38,511
Oh, Edward!
Tha'll never know how glad I am to hear that! Have a nice day!
67
00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:47,619
I don't think he's in the mood
for a nice day. Why not? He has every advantage.
68
00:06:47,628 --> 00:06:53,108
Wife left him. Maybe her first name
is Lucy. Got fed up being Lucy Lucy.
69
00:07:13,036 --> 00:07:17,135
Oh, no, you don't!
Keep it in your cup!
70
00:07:17,141 --> 00:07:19,840
You sound like a bath emptying!
71
00:07:19,844 --> 00:07:22,483
They say running water is peaceful.
72
00:07:22,487 --> 00:07:25,126
I wish my vac had as much suction!
73
00:07:25,130 --> 00:07:28,509
At least your vac runs quieter!
74
00:07:28,514 --> 00:07:33,273
Drink it!
I don't want to hear a sound!
75
00:07:33,279 --> 00:07:37,498
How can anybody drink
without making a sound?
76
00:07:37,504 --> 00:07:39,704
Other people do!
77
00:07:43,891 --> 00:07:46,270
There you are!
78
00:07:46,274 --> 00:07:50,393
Oh, aye, they've both
been brought up to be ladylike.
79
00:07:50,399 --> 00:07:54,158
You say that about the man
who caught the Fulham Flasher?
80
00:07:54,163 --> 00:07:57,303
By his elbow, I trust?
81
00:07:58,828 --> 00:08:03,008
Go on - surprise me
with a cup of silent tea!
82
00:08:11,623 --> 00:08:16,823
There you go, whispering lips!
You can do it if you try!
83
00:08:18,630 --> 00:08:21,910
SHLURP!
84
00:08:24,737 --> 00:08:29,056
Not me, madam! I was house-trained
by the former Mrs Truelove!
85
00:08:29,062 --> 00:08:33,361
Not me.
I was worrying about this letter.
86
00:08:33,367 --> 00:08:36,106
What letter? For Marina.
87
00:08:36,110 --> 00:08:39,129
Why is tha writing to Marina?
88
00:08:39,134 --> 00:08:45,753
Not me - Howard! I thought you'd
stopped delivering letters for him. He wears you down.
89
00:08:45,761 --> 00:08:48,300
I know the feeling!
90
00:08:48,304 --> 00:08:53,224
I can't bear to see him
chewing sadly on a fluffy duster.
91
00:09:01,579 --> 00:09:06,339
Shake yourself! You can't distribute
leaflets hanging about in there.
92
00:09:10,229 --> 00:09:15,968
Why have I got to wear these?
You're representing the pony set.
93
00:09:15,975 --> 00:09:20,614
On foot! Whose pony
could handle legs like that?
94
00:09:20,620 --> 00:09:24,339
Your face'll do just as well
as a pony!
95
00:09:24,345 --> 00:09:28,904
Just stroll through the town
and pass out the leaflets.
96
00:09:28,910 --> 00:09:35,109
Make people aware of the wonderful
range of riding gear here at Auntie Wainwright's.
97
00:09:35,117 --> 00:09:38,476
I'm not sure
if it goes with my image.
98
00:09:38,481 --> 00:09:42,360
I'm not sure either,
but who'd want to buy that?
99
00:09:42,365 --> 00:09:47,364
I suppose I ought to be thankful
you're not selling ladies' frocks.
100
00:09:47,371 --> 00:09:50,251
Funny you should say that!
101
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:03,394
Why is the sky blue?
102
00:10:03,399 --> 00:10:06,338
What do you want - polka dots?
103
00:10:06,342 --> 00:10:09,021
I'll ask Norman.
104
00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:12,084
I expect God employed a decorator.
105
00:10:12,088 --> 00:10:15,947
It'd be full
of poncy little flowers if he'd employed a decorator.
106
00:10:15,953 --> 00:10:18,872
I arrested an interior decorator.
107
00:10:18,876 --> 00:10:23,135
He refused to give a statement
until we got some lavender notepaper.
108
00:10:23,141 --> 00:10:27,001
Hey-up! There's Lucy!
109
00:10:33,272 --> 00:10:37,551
I thought he was looking for bleak.
This isn't bleak.
110
00:10:37,557 --> 00:10:42,217
This is picturesque,
the kind of place people litter.
111
00:10:46,107 --> 00:10:49,007
I think he's going to jump!
Into six inches of water?!
112
00:10:51,072 --> 00:10:58,351
I think he needs help. He does
if he's jumping there. We'll have to help him find somewhere deeper.
113
00:10:58,361 --> 00:11:01,341
Hey-up, Lucy!
114
00:11:04,187 --> 00:11:06,827
That was a big help(!)
115
00:11:10,274 --> 00:11:12,873
Everything for the pony set!
116
00:11:12,877 --> 00:11:20,196
I've always rather fancied
belonging to a pony set now we've got the fitted kitchen.
117
00:11:20,205 --> 00:11:24,984
It must be easier than golf.
Instead of 12 clubs, 1 pony.
118
00:11:24,991 --> 00:11:31,890
There's not much fun being a member
of Auntie Wainwright's pony set. Does she hire ponies?
119
00:11:31,898 --> 00:11:37,877
Are they all manual
or would she have an automatic? Knowing her, probably!
120
00:11:37,885 --> 00:11:41,304
I wonder if I might soon be at home
in t'saddle.
121
00:11:41,309 --> 00:11:46,348
If it's a saddle you want,
I think someone left one in here!
122
00:11:46,355 --> 00:11:49,554
My Glenda would enjoy t'pony set.
123
00:11:49,558 --> 00:11:56,058
It's such a natural move
once you get bored with 50 All-Time Classical Favourites.
124
00:12:06,898 --> 00:12:13,677
Aren't they dry yet?
Don't be impatient. Keep running about. Enjoy yourself.
125
00:12:13,686 --> 00:12:18,485
There's nothing worse than
damp clothes. How about no clothes?
126
00:12:18,491 --> 00:12:22,850
Could he run and deliver
Howard's letter? Not to a lady.
127
00:12:22,856 --> 00:12:27,716
By! She'd think
it had really come first class!
128
00:12:29,864 --> 00:12:32,143
It's not very warm.
129
00:12:32,146 --> 00:12:36,045
You can't expect to be warm
if you're leaping into rivers!
130
00:12:36,051 --> 00:12:41,330
I didn't leap - I was startled.
I was as good as pushed!
131
00:12:41,337 --> 00:12:46,296
Tha were planning to jump in!
In me own good time!
132
00:12:46,302 --> 00:12:53,281
Is there a good time
for jumping into a river? There's a better time than the one I took.
133
00:12:53,290 --> 00:12:56,649
Why were tha wanting to jump in?
Don't encourage him!
134
00:12:56,654 --> 00:13:01,833
These folk are dramatic enough. The
last thing they need is an audience.
135
00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:09,339
The police tactic for excitable men
like this is a spot of counselling with a ballpoint pen up his nostril!
136
00:13:09,348 --> 00:13:13,367
Remind me never to borrow your pen!
137
00:13:13,373 --> 00:13:18,552
You don't use your own pen!
Heavens, no! There's an etiquette.
138
00:13:18,559 --> 00:13:25,858
Does it work? They're meant
to write under water. Not the pen - the nostril bit. Does it work?
139
00:13:25,867 --> 00:13:29,146
Instantly soothes the agitated.
140
00:13:29,151 --> 00:13:31,590
It's the policeman's lullaby.
141
00:13:31,594 --> 00:13:34,034
Brings tears to your eyes.
142
00:13:35,698 --> 00:13:38,397
Am I dry yet?
143
00:13:38,401 --> 00:13:40,681
Hang on.
144
00:13:48,433 --> 00:13:52,332
Where did he get the blue suit?
That's his skin!
145
00:13:52,337 --> 00:13:55,076
I've seen better-looking corpses.
146
00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:58,299
We used to do lino in that colour.
147
00:13:58,304 --> 00:14:02,784
It was never very popular.
I can see why!
148
00:14:07,935 --> 00:14:11,834
Have you never heard of
hypothermia? Aye, I've heard of it.
149
00:14:11,839 --> 00:14:14,978
I backed it yesterday in the 2.30.
150
00:14:14,982 --> 00:14:17,421
It means losing heat.
151
00:14:17,425 --> 00:14:19,885
Aye, that's the one.
152
00:14:20,949 --> 00:14:25,228
Your socks are nearly dry.
Where are you coldest?
153
00:14:25,234 --> 00:14:29,013
Not something I care to discuss
with strangers.
154
00:14:29,018 --> 00:14:31,837
Socks won't help much, then!
155
00:14:31,842 --> 00:14:36,082
Eskimos rub themselves
with walrus fat.
156
00:14:39,190 --> 00:14:44,869
But, of course, they have very
little in the way of entertainment.
157
00:14:44,876 --> 00:14:48,555
Let him get dressed.
They're almost dry.
158
00:14:48,560 --> 00:14:52,619
Will you be passing
number 21 Wilton Place?
159
00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:58,164
I'd like to get word to Mrs Lucy
there. I thought she left thee?
160
00:14:58,171 --> 00:15:02,210
Well, symbolically.
I'm sleeping in the spare bedroom.
161
00:15:02,216 --> 00:15:06,075
What word? That I've been seen
acting desperately.
162
00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:09,500
Six inches?!
Tha calls that desperate?
163
00:15:12,688 --> 00:15:15,467
I was expecting word from Howard.
164
00:15:15,471 --> 00:15:20,310
He said he'd write. He doesn't
have to wear riding breeches!
165
00:15:20,316 --> 00:15:25,715
All I've had is a sinister silence.
I need to show myself near his house,
166
00:15:25,722 --> 00:15:28,441
so we might exchange a signal.
167
00:15:28,445 --> 00:15:31,964
Of course, I need something
so I don't look like me.
168
00:15:31,969 --> 00:15:35,808
I couldn't help noticing
that you don't look like you.
169
00:15:35,814 --> 00:15:39,734
Auntie's riding gear
may be just the thing!
170
00:15:47,347 --> 00:15:51,186
I don't pay you to fraternise
with the females!
171
00:15:51,191 --> 00:15:55,230
You don't pay me at all!
If you're going to get technical...!
172
00:15:55,236 --> 00:15:59,315
Anyway, I wasn't fraternising.
She's a customer.
173
00:15:59,320 --> 00:16:01,919
You've brought me a customer?
174
00:16:01,923 --> 00:16:08,102
I knew you had it in you
if I could get you motivated or even some sign you were breathing.
175
00:16:08,110 --> 00:16:11,749
I am breathing!
It doesn't come across.
176
00:16:11,754 --> 00:16:16,534
I'm grooming you for stardom.
I'll make you an ace salesman yet.
177
00:16:20,464 --> 00:16:23,383
"Riding simulator"?
178
00:16:23,387 --> 00:16:30,186
Does it exercise the thighs?
Don't yours get enough exercise, all that time spent cycling?
179
00:16:30,195 --> 00:16:34,555
I can't tell you how relieved I am
that you specified cycling.
180
00:16:37,383 --> 00:16:41,362
My Barry's thinking
of taking up equitation.
181
00:16:41,368 --> 00:16:44,107
A very wise career move.
182
00:16:44,111 --> 00:16:48,930
I expect he'd need that kind of
mathematics in a building society.
183
00:16:48,936 --> 00:16:51,055
Horses, Mother!
184
00:16:51,059 --> 00:16:53,878
And horses to you, girl!
185
00:16:53,882 --> 00:16:59,101
You're not past getting a clip on
the ear just because you're married.
186
00:16:59,108 --> 00:17:04,468
Equitation is horse riding. My
Barry's thinking of taking up riding.
187
00:17:05,875 --> 00:17:08,974
A son-in-law - in the pony set!
188
00:17:08,979 --> 00:17:12,599
Next he'll be leaving you
for his secretary.
189
00:17:14,165 --> 00:17:18,104
They do!
They leave you for the secretaries.
190
00:17:18,109 --> 00:17:21,888
They're safer
in a low-profile situation.
191
00:17:21,893 --> 00:17:24,452
Ambition is all right in its place,
192
00:17:24,456 --> 00:17:29,115
but they usually end up practising
it in somebody else's place.
193
00:17:29,122 --> 00:17:33,461
My Barry doesn't have a secretary.
They've been computerised.
194
00:17:33,466 --> 00:17:37,285
He didn't have an urge for a horse
until today.
195
00:17:37,291 --> 00:17:41,090
Not a big jump from there
to a secretary.
196
00:17:41,095 --> 00:17:47,414
I can do without the horses,
but I do love well-dressed men in riding gear
197
00:17:47,422 --> 00:17:52,021
ever since I saw Gary Cooper
in a pair of jodhpurs.
198
00:17:52,027 --> 00:17:55,927
I expect my Barry will look good
in a pair of jodhpurs.
199
00:17:57,153 --> 00:18:03,212
Mine would look all wrong
in jodhpurs, even though he's built like a jockey.
200
00:18:03,220 --> 00:18:07,339
Where is your Barry going riding
with this secretary?
201
00:18:07,345 --> 00:18:11,665
He's not going anywhere.
I'll see to that.
202
00:18:15,894 --> 00:18:21,313
You don't have to go through all
this business of jumping into rivers.
203
00:18:21,320 --> 00:18:24,959
Just go up to the house
and make it up with her.
204
00:18:24,965 --> 00:18:28,244
How? You stick a ballpoint...
205
00:18:28,248 --> 00:18:31,607
No, no, no.
That's only for emergencies.
206
00:18:31,612 --> 00:18:34,211
Give her the softly softly approach.
207
00:18:34,215 --> 00:18:39,274
I bet she's softly softly
underneath. They all are.
208
00:18:39,281 --> 00:18:43,540
You never met the former
Mrs Truelove. How far underneath?
209
00:18:43,545 --> 00:18:46,004
Never mind. It's too late for thee.
210
00:18:46,008 --> 00:18:49,407
There you are.
Outside your cosy little nest.
211
00:18:49,412 --> 00:18:53,971
Isn't that better
than wandering the hills? It is.
212
00:18:53,977 --> 00:19:00,357
There you are, then. Give her a call.
Speak gently to her. What's your pet name for her?
213
00:19:02,787 --> 00:19:07,286
Tha can tell us. I don't want
to hear it if it's mushy.
214
00:19:07,292 --> 00:19:09,291
It's not mushy.
215
00:19:09,295 --> 00:19:13,934
I shall only be embarrassed or sick
or something.
216
00:19:13,940 --> 00:19:17,339
Pay no attention.
You can tell us her pet name.
217
00:19:17,344 --> 00:19:19,203
Honey pot.
218
00:19:19,206 --> 00:19:21,306
Honey pot? Eugh!
219
00:19:23,130 --> 00:19:25,629
What did you call yours?
220
00:19:25,633 --> 00:19:28,032
Mrs Clegg, mostly.
221
00:19:28,036 --> 00:19:33,115
What did you call her in moments
of high emotion? We didn't have any.
222
00:19:33,121 --> 00:19:37,840
She was chapel
and there was all the new furniture.
223
00:19:37,847 --> 00:19:42,486
What did tha call her when tha were
courting? We didn't talk a lot.
224
00:19:42,492 --> 00:19:47,231
Sunday collars were far too tight
for conversation.
225
00:19:47,237 --> 00:19:49,956
I had several names for Mabel.
226
00:19:49,960 --> 00:19:55,160
..Call the little woman. Give her
a shout. Go on, man - shout!
227
00:19:57,169 --> 00:19:59,909
Honey pot. Louder!
228
00:20:01,553 --> 00:20:03,513
Honey pot.
229
00:20:08,001 --> 00:20:12,941
Get your stupid self indoors!
Thank you, precious!
230
00:20:14,568 --> 00:20:17,688
You were right. It worked.
231
00:20:19,654 --> 00:20:24,534
I think the instinct for flight
was a sound one.
232
00:20:32,949 --> 00:20:35,508
Wasn't that...? No...
233
00:20:35,512 --> 00:20:38,112
Couldn't have been.
234
00:20:41,298 --> 00:20:47,897
We're not saying there's a proven
scientific link between wayward husbands and riding breeches.
235
00:20:47,906 --> 00:20:50,565
But they're close.
I don't see why.
236
00:20:50,569 --> 00:20:57,948
That's because you haven't a
suspicious bone in your body, which puts you at a terrible disadvantage.
237
00:20:57,957 --> 00:21:00,496
It's a question of mating signals.
238
00:21:00,500 --> 00:21:05,339
Women wear negligees -
men wear riding breeches.
239
00:21:05,345 --> 00:21:09,104
I can't see you in a negligee.
And you won't!
240
00:21:09,110 --> 00:21:12,769
A clean pinny
was signal enough for me!
241
00:21:12,774 --> 00:21:18,554
TOOT!
Here's Barry. Does that sound like the horn of a wayward husband?
242
00:21:34,979 --> 00:21:39,298
Barry...why are you sending out
these mating signals?
243
00:21:39,304 --> 00:21:43,143
I was just sounding my horn
to attract attention.
244
00:21:43,148 --> 00:21:45,607
You see? he admits it!
245
00:21:45,611 --> 00:21:50,110
Credit where it's due.
Ooh, he looks very smart.
246
00:21:50,116 --> 00:21:54,375
He's no business looking smart -
he's married!
247
00:21:54,381 --> 00:21:58,380
What have you got to say, Barry,
about wearing riding gear?
248
00:21:58,385 --> 00:22:02,444
They're not easy for driving in.
I can't recommend them for that.
249
00:22:02,450 --> 00:22:04,750
Who is she, Barry?
250
00:22:06,014 --> 00:22:08,453
I don't know what you mean.
251
00:22:08,457 --> 00:22:11,477
Maybe this'll refresh his memory.
252
00:22:16,386 --> 00:22:21,566
If we're talking the wayward husband
stakes, there goes the favourite!
253
00:22:23,694 --> 00:22:27,393
Barry,
what are you doing with that woman?
254
00:22:27,398 --> 00:22:29,497
What woman?
255
00:22:29,500 --> 00:22:33,459
I thought it was peculiar,
this sudden pony thing.
256
00:22:33,465 --> 00:22:35,685
Especially that pony!
257
00:22:38,230 --> 00:22:40,810
Was it something I said?
258
00:22:45,438 --> 00:22:50,498
I still think men look magnificent
in riding gear.
259
00:22:52,867 --> 00:22:56,107
That's it! The magic key!
260
00:23:00,996 --> 00:23:03,375
Chicken!
261
00:23:03,379 --> 00:23:08,659
Granted. If you keep any more
distance, I'll have to go mail order.
262
00:23:09,706 --> 00:23:12,405
Isn't there anything you need?
263
00:23:12,409 --> 00:23:18,568
I'm afraid
I can give you no information but name, rank and number.
264
00:23:18,576 --> 00:23:23,475
It fits better than his own gear.
What kind of recommendation's that?
265
00:23:23,481 --> 00:23:27,060
Everything does!
They fit in better places too!
266
00:23:27,065 --> 00:23:31,145
He's lucky I had them in.
Barry's just brought them back.
267
00:23:35,435 --> 00:23:42,434
I could hold all my ferrets
in these! I hope you're better at riding them than backing them!
268
00:23:42,443 --> 00:23:47,262
And to demonstrate to some people
that I'm not just a money-grabber,
269
00:23:47,268 --> 00:23:52,128
I'll throw in - free - his chance
to test the riding simulator.
270
00:23:53,215 --> 00:23:55,974
Riding simulator?
271
00:23:55,978 --> 00:23:58,698
Free! Lucky you!
272
00:24:07,991 --> 00:24:10,870
Wesley made it for me.
273
00:24:10,875 --> 00:24:13,434
THIS is a riding simulator?!
274
00:24:13,438 --> 00:24:17,117
Well, it's not for sleeping on,
as you'll find out!
275
00:24:17,122 --> 00:24:24,161
I can handle that. That's
what you said about that barmaid. I got caught in her earrings.
276
00:24:24,170 --> 00:24:27,090
You weren't in any hurry to get out.
277
00:24:28,815 --> 00:24:34,114
How does it work? Wesley
will tow it with his Land Rover.
278
00:24:34,121 --> 00:24:38,360
Not much of a riding simulator!
It will be - on the rough road!
279
00:24:38,366 --> 00:24:44,485
He'll find a road
with plenty of potholes and bumps. It'll be a real riding simulator.
280
00:24:44,493 --> 00:24:48,532
A very stimulating simulator.
You can do it.
281
00:24:48,537 --> 00:24:52,317
I have faith in you.
Of course, I could be lying.
282
00:24:55,705 --> 00:25:00,864
This should do. Look at the surface.
Going to be like a moon walk.
283
00:25:00,871 --> 00:25:04,870
And guess who's going to be
the little man on the moon?!
284
00:25:04,876 --> 00:25:11,375
That should put a damper
on the romance industry if word gets out that it's him up there!
285
00:25:11,383 --> 00:25:19,382
With the most powerful telescopes,
they'll be able to map all the craters in your southern hemisphere.
286
00:25:19,392 --> 00:25:24,011
Don't forget to send a copy
to Nora Batty!
287
00:25:24,017 --> 00:25:25,976
..Steady, lad!
288
00:25:25,979 --> 00:25:28,538
Is he ready?
289
00:25:28,542 --> 00:25:30,902
I think "barmy" is closer!
290
00:25:34,970 --> 00:25:41,650
Hey-up! There's no brakes on this!
It's going uphill. Why d'you need brakes?
291
00:25:44,741 --> 00:25:47,141
Come on.
292
00:25:48,785 --> 00:25:51,665
You're doing great.
293
00:25:55,753 --> 00:25:58,532
This is not exactly soft!
294
00:25:58,536 --> 00:26:02,435
Take your weight on your thighs -
the thighs!
295
00:26:02,441 --> 00:26:09,021
That's why breeches have leather
on the thighs. I know where the leather ought to be. Aargh!
296
00:26:10,350 --> 00:26:14,889
Here we go. Slowly forward, Wesley.
Take up the slack.
297
00:26:14,895 --> 00:26:17,834
I think the slack's all in his head.
298
00:26:17,838 --> 00:26:21,697
Remember, though -
I'm doing this for Nora!
299
00:26:21,702 --> 00:26:24,662
Whoa! See what I mean?
300
00:26:34,136 --> 00:26:36,756
It's a piece of cake, Norm!
301
00:26:39,182 --> 00:26:41,962
Tally-ho!
302
00:27:16,344 --> 00:27:21,443
I hope he gets here soon.
I'm ready for a pint. HELP!
303
00:27:21,450 --> 00:27:23,730
Get out the way!
304
00:27:46,558 --> 00:27:49,197
She never got that letter!
305
00:27:49,201 --> 00:27:54,300
Oh, I'm sorry. You know how it is
when you're enjoying yourself.
306
00:27:54,307 --> 00:27:59,567
What's up with him?
A nasty kick from a riding simulator.
307
00:28:06,000 --> 00:28:08,520
Shortage of leather.
308
00:28:08,570 --> 00:28:13,120
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