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1
00:01:11,000 --> 00:01:12,540
Ooh!
2
00:01:12,540 --> 00:01:15,060
Many's been lost through money!
3
00:01:15,060 --> 00:01:20,500
I couldn't believe YOU had
the money! Get away! Keep away!
4
00:01:20,500 --> 00:01:25,300
Not likely! I've 7p invested
in this. Have your money back.
5
00:01:25,300 --> 00:01:28,860
Money back
AND a big luscious kiss!
6
00:01:28,860 --> 00:01:33,760
What kind of a bargain is that? One
in the bargain basement! Here! Ooh!
7
00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:36,320
Oooh! Ooooh!
8
00:01:50,240 --> 00:01:52,120
God!
9
00:01:52,120 --> 00:01:56,560
I wish you wouldn't appear
like that, Howard.
10
00:01:56,560 --> 00:02:00,180
It's not as if
I was rubbing a lamp.
11
00:02:00,180 --> 00:02:04,700
I was just looking for
a friendly face to talk to.
12
00:02:04,700 --> 00:02:09,060
I don't know how you can do it
without making a sound.
13
00:02:09,060 --> 00:02:12,580
You could creep silently
for England!
14
00:02:12,580 --> 00:02:17,300
You learn to move silently
when you're married to Pearl.
15
00:02:17,300 --> 00:02:22,160
I can understand that.
She jumps to the wrong conclusions.
16
00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:24,780
I can understand that, too.
17
00:02:24,780 --> 00:02:30,400
What do you think of a woman
that locks a person's bicycle away?
18
00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:35,380
I think that's diabolical, Howard.
19
00:02:35,380 --> 00:02:38,300
You were very close to that bicycle.
20
00:02:38,300 --> 00:02:42,260
Why has she locked
your bicycle away?
21
00:02:42,260 --> 00:02:46,900
Because she thinks I use it
to entertain other women.
22
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:50,940
It doesn't sound
all that entertaining, Howard.
23
00:02:50,940 --> 00:02:54,240
Where has she locked
your bicycle away?
24
00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:56,620
In the spare bedroom.
25
00:02:56,620 --> 00:03:02,180
I miss that bicycle. I feel cut off
from all human contact.
26
00:03:02,180 --> 00:03:05,680
I know who you feel cut off from,
Howard.
27
00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:08,220
I don't know what you mean.
28
00:03:08,220 --> 00:03:14,140
If you can't lie any better, no
wonder you've got a bicycle famine.
29
00:03:14,140 --> 00:03:18,820
How long is Pearl planning
to confiscate your bicycle?
30
00:03:18,820 --> 00:03:23,180
I think she means permanently!
You've got to help me!
31
00:03:23,180 --> 00:03:27,040
Long ago, Howard,
when boy scouts wore shorts,
32
00:03:27,040 --> 00:03:31,960
I had a penknife with a thing for
getting stones from horses' hooves.
33
00:03:31,960 --> 00:03:36,620
I don't know why,
I'd never get that close to a horse,
34
00:03:36,620 --> 00:03:42,620
in exactly the same way
I've no intention of going near your bicycle.
35
00:03:42,620 --> 00:03:46,680
It's inhuman to deprive a man
of his bicycle!
36
00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:49,900
I'm not getting involved, Howard!
37
00:03:49,900 --> 00:03:54,320
This is ME speaking -
Norman Clegg, "man of steel".
38
00:04:05,780 --> 00:04:10,620
You can't afford to go wasting
your money! I don't waste it.
39
00:04:10,620 --> 00:04:14,360
I save it up for betting!
You'll thank me!
40
00:04:14,360 --> 00:04:18,060
I'm good with money! Since when?
41
00:04:18,060 --> 00:04:23,880
You'd be surprised what I got today
for 7p. What can you get for 7p?
42
00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:28,620
I got a big hug from Nora Batty
and a clip round the lughole!
43
00:04:28,620 --> 00:04:32,880
Now, I think
that is pretty good going for 7p!
44
00:04:34,160 --> 00:04:36,620
HE SIGHS
45
00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:40,160
Confiscated your bicycle?!
46
00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:42,840
How wicked can they get?
47
00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:49,400
You'll get used to it.
Some people live their whole lives without a bicycle.
48
00:04:49,400 --> 00:04:51,340
What people?
49
00:04:51,340 --> 00:04:55,740
Well...stockbrokers...
BMW drivers...
50
00:04:55,740 --> 00:04:59,320
chairmen
of de-nationalised industries...
51
00:04:59,320 --> 00:05:02,700
You'll have to help me get it back!
52
00:05:02,700 --> 00:05:07,240
It's something you'll have
to handle by yourself. Alone?
53
00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:12,180
There comes a time when a man
has to stand up and be counted.
54
00:05:12,180 --> 00:05:16,460
Couldn't we all four stand up
and be counted?
55
00:05:16,460 --> 00:05:23,780
I'm NOT getting involved
in any eternal triangle between a man, his wife and his bicycle.
56
00:05:23,780 --> 00:05:26,460
Tha's got to sort this out, Howard.
57
00:05:26,460 --> 00:05:31,380
You can't let this one slide,
Howard. Sort it out and do it NOW!
58
00:05:31,380 --> 00:05:35,800
Now? This very instant!
It's decision time, Howard.
59
00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:40,080
March out of here, go back home
and get your bicycle!
60
00:05:46,880 --> 00:05:49,780
Tha's got to do it, Howard.
61
00:05:49,780 --> 00:05:51,800
Alone, Howard.
62
00:05:52,980 --> 00:05:56,800
Could you just come with me...
to the door?
63
00:05:56,800 --> 00:06:00,800
It's just a question
of making your mind up, Howard!
64
00:06:00,800 --> 00:06:02,800
Be dynamic!
65
00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:05,320
Go! Get your bicycle!
66
00:06:06,840 --> 00:06:08,640
I will!
67
00:06:08,640 --> 00:06:10,440
I will!
68
00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:12,200
I'll do it!
69
00:06:15,380 --> 00:06:18,840
I'll do it! This time, I'll do it!
Aha!
70
00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:23,720
It's showdown time!
71
00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:39,720
Woman...inside!
72
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,660
I never thought he had it in him!
73
00:06:51,660 --> 00:06:56,740
He was magnificent!
I knew he could do it if he tried.
74
00:06:56,740 --> 00:07:04,280
That's what men need -
the influence of one who can stir them up to the point of battle!
75
00:07:04,280 --> 00:07:06,760
She got a shock!
76
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:09,340
Did tha see Pearl's face?
77
00:07:09,340 --> 00:07:11,820
I bet she DID get a shock!
78
00:07:11,820 --> 00:07:15,400
It's like being savaged
by your budgie!
79
00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:18,280
It'll mean a whole new life for him.
80
00:07:18,280 --> 00:07:22,100
And for her, too.
Mind you, she's asked for it.
81
00:07:22,100 --> 00:07:25,840
It's time he took command
of his own house.
82
00:07:26,980 --> 00:07:28,960
RING, RING
83
00:07:40,140 --> 00:07:44,560
CHOKING: Can you get this thing...
from round me neck?
84
00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:49,760
I've heard of snake charming,
but that's ridiculous!
85
00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:52,000
What is it, Howard?
86
00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:57,200
It's an inner tube. She nearly
strangled me with the inner tube!
87
00:07:57,200 --> 00:08:01,300
"You want your bicycle," she said,
"here, take this!"
88
00:08:01,300 --> 00:08:04,920
I think it looks quite good!
It suits him -
89
00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:07,720
wearing his "old school bicycle"!
90
00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:10,640
Get me out!
91
00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:13,920
Don't worry.
If she wants a challenge,
92
00:08:13,920 --> 00:08:16,700
we'll release you and your bicycle.
93
00:08:16,700 --> 00:08:21,640
Eh-up, go careful! We could
all end up wearing bicycle!
94
00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:27,900
You know what we need, don't you?
95
00:08:27,900 --> 00:08:30,460
A pint? No, not a pint!
96
00:08:30,460 --> 00:08:32,220
Two pints?
97
00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:36,760
Have you always been good
at economics? Yes, Norman!
98
00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:41,620
Let me rephrase the statement -
you know what HOWARD needs?
99
00:08:41,620 --> 00:08:45,940
I've known that for a long time!
I know what I need -
100
00:08:45,940 --> 00:08:50,200
NOT to get involved
in recapturing Howard's bicycle.
101
00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:51,920
Exactly!
102
00:08:51,920 --> 00:08:56,360
There's no need! The plan is...
Oooh! We have a plan!
103
00:08:56,360 --> 00:09:03,500
It's simple military practice -
when an objective becomes too difficult to attack head-on,
104
00:09:03,500 --> 00:09:06,760
you have to find
some different approach.
105
00:09:06,760 --> 00:09:09,640
Retreat! No, not retreat!
106
00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:12,080
I knew he'd say that!
107
00:09:23,633 --> 00:09:25,793
HE WHISTLES
108
00:09:31,913 --> 00:09:33,953
Quietly now!
109
00:09:33,953 --> 00:09:36,413
Which is the window? That one!
110
00:09:39,593 --> 00:09:41,113
Drat!
111
00:09:45,073 --> 00:09:48,173
Keep it quiet, will you?
112
00:09:48,173 --> 00:09:51,693
This is a maximum
security operation!
113
00:09:51,693 --> 00:09:55,533
I think I left my kettle on!
Stay where you are!
114
00:09:55,533 --> 00:09:57,913
Right, up you go!
115
00:09:57,913 --> 00:09:59,453
What? Me?
116
00:09:59,453 --> 00:10:03,853
It's your bike!
I thought one of YOU would go up!
117
00:10:03,853 --> 00:10:08,133
No, if we go and get it,
it's "breaking and entering".
118
00:10:08,133 --> 00:10:12,133
It's your house, you can get in
any way you like.
119
00:10:25,133 --> 00:10:28,673
Go on,
get the bicycle and pass it to us
120
00:10:28,673 --> 00:10:30,973
through the window!
121
00:10:32,853 --> 00:10:38,033
He's not exactly a lovely mover,
is he? No, very civilian.
122
00:10:39,113 --> 00:10:41,933
SMASH AND TUMBLE
123
00:10:41,933 --> 00:10:45,693
FOGGY SIGHS
I don't like it.
124
00:10:45,693 --> 00:10:49,493
You've got to help
a chap retrieve his bike.
125
00:10:49,493 --> 00:10:54,613
The right to a bicycle is one of
the props of western civilisation.
126
00:10:54,613 --> 00:10:59,033
I shall help Howard
to the utmost of my ability.
127
00:11:07,353 --> 00:11:10,313
She's chained it to the bed!
128
00:11:11,713 --> 00:11:14,393
Er... Hello, love!
129
00:11:14,393 --> 00:11:17,673
I was just thinking,
130
00:11:17,673 --> 00:11:20,153
what a clever idea!
131
00:11:36,993 --> 00:11:39,633
WOMAN: See you, bye!
132
00:11:39,633 --> 00:11:42,013
THEY CHAT
133
00:11:45,173 --> 00:11:48,593
Are you wanting to cross the road,
love?
134
00:11:48,593 --> 00:11:51,053
That's very kind of you!
135
00:11:51,053 --> 00:11:53,573
Thank you.
You're welcome!
136
00:11:53,573 --> 00:11:55,933
You all right?
Yes.
137
00:11:55,933 --> 00:12:01,713
You know it's very difficult
for old folks in these hectic times.
138
00:12:01,713 --> 00:12:03,753
It is, yeah.
139
00:12:03,753 --> 00:12:06,293
Can you help me inside the shop?
140
00:12:06,293 --> 00:12:08,953
Of course!
Mind the step!
141
00:12:12,993 --> 00:12:19,293
Now, let's see if I have
a little something for you, as a token of my appreciation.
142
00:12:19,293 --> 00:12:22,993
There's no need to bother
with things like that!
143
00:12:22,993 --> 00:12:29,013
It's no bother,
no bother at all! Come inside and have a browse around.
144
00:12:39,453 --> 00:12:43,353
What Howard really needs
is a secret bicycle.
145
00:12:43,353 --> 00:12:45,953
A secret bicycle? Yeah.
146
00:12:45,953 --> 00:12:47,893
Wowee!
147
00:12:47,893 --> 00:12:51,673
An extra bicycle
nobody else knows about.
148
00:12:51,673 --> 00:12:54,233
Something small that he can conceal.
149
00:12:54,233 --> 00:12:57,153
A pocket bicycle! Just add water!
150
00:12:59,413 --> 00:13:03,773
But why are we walking
towards Auntie Wainwright's?
151
00:13:03,773 --> 00:13:07,113
She sells second-hand bicycles.
Uh-oh.
152
00:13:07,113 --> 00:13:12,633
We shan't buy anything unless it's
cheap. She's not very big on cheap.
153
00:13:12,633 --> 00:13:15,093
Howard's paying, anyway.
154
00:13:15,093 --> 00:13:18,893
She'll probably give a discount -
he IS family.
155
00:13:18,893 --> 00:13:22,173
Well...she'll rip him off
more gently.
156
00:13:22,173 --> 00:13:26,653
I'll wait outide - but my thoughts
will be with you!
157
00:13:26,653 --> 00:13:31,513
I know my duty. I shall not flinch
from spending Howard's money.
158
00:13:31,513 --> 00:13:34,993
BOLT OPENING AND KEYS JANGLING
159
00:13:41,193 --> 00:13:43,733
You've a shrewd eye for a bargain!
160
00:13:43,733 --> 00:13:48,573
I've no more discounts.
You're not wanting anything reduced?
161
00:13:48,573 --> 00:13:51,593
We only helped her
across the road.
162
00:13:51,593 --> 00:13:56,393
They were very kind! You have
to show your gratitude in some way.
163
00:13:56,393 --> 00:14:03,633
They weren't intending to be
customers? They just thought they were helping you across the road?
164
00:14:04,773 --> 00:14:08,713
And they say the age of chivalry
is dead!
165
00:14:11,033 --> 00:14:13,473
Ooh! Hey! Oi!
166
00:14:13,473 --> 00:14:14,933
No!
167
00:14:14,933 --> 00:14:17,013
Com... Oooh!
168
00:14:18,073 --> 00:14:19,853
Hmmmmph!
169
00:14:23,073 --> 00:14:25,473
QUIET CHATTER
170
00:14:27,073 --> 00:14:34,093
They're up to something.
Men with their heads together rarely amounts to much brain.
171
00:14:34,093 --> 00:14:37,173
If they're quiet
it suits me.
172
00:14:37,173 --> 00:14:41,013
I take a broader view
on account of other customers.
173
00:14:41,013 --> 00:14:44,533
You saw him -
he walked straight past me.
174
00:14:44,533 --> 00:14:47,953
It's worrying
if he goes straight past me.
175
00:14:47,953 --> 00:14:50,513
Why? That should be a relief!
176
00:14:50,513 --> 00:14:52,373
Not really.
177
00:14:52,373 --> 00:14:55,853
When he attacks,
you know where you are.
178
00:14:55,853 --> 00:15:00,613
It's when he ignores you, you
wonder where it'll come from next.
179
00:15:01,713 --> 00:15:05,173
I don't care how secret a bicycle,
180
00:15:05,173 --> 00:15:08,953
I am NOT going
to Auntie Wainwright's.
181
00:15:08,953 --> 00:15:12,433
I think we're all agreed on that.
182
00:15:12,433 --> 00:15:15,053
Ere, Nora Batty's watching!
183
00:15:15,053 --> 00:15:18,713
Have I got time to create
a bit of mischief?
184
00:15:18,713 --> 00:15:21,153
No. I 'll be back in a flash!
185
00:15:21,153 --> 00:15:23,553
Stay where you are!
186
00:15:23,553 --> 00:15:31,033
I don't know. There never seems
enough time to do all the things a bloke ought to do.
187
00:15:31,033 --> 00:15:33,833
It sounds like executive stress.
188
00:15:36,013 --> 00:15:40,433
Tha could be right an' all.
SLURPING
189
00:15:40,433 --> 00:15:42,573
Oh, God!
190
00:15:42,573 --> 00:15:46,473
PROLONGED SLURPING
Will you pay attention?
191
00:15:46,473 --> 00:15:49,273
We're supposed to be planning here!
192
00:15:49,273 --> 00:15:56,073
Look at the problem -
we've got one idiot, without a bicycle, for the use of.
193
00:15:56,073 --> 00:15:58,613
Now, we need someone to help him...
194
00:15:58,613 --> 00:16:02,833
Another idiot...
but a more mechanical one.
195
00:16:03,893 --> 00:16:06,113
Wesley!
Wesley!
196
00:16:06,113 --> 00:16:08,413
I rest my case.
197
00:16:18,253 --> 00:16:20,793
Hang on a minute, I forgot summat.
198
00:16:20,793 --> 00:16:24,213
He didn't have anything -
what's he forgotten?
199
00:16:25,113 --> 00:16:26,753
Oooow!
200
00:16:26,753 --> 00:16:30,033
I think that was it. Oh, that!
201
00:16:33,473 --> 00:16:35,973
Well, tha knows how it is,
202
00:16:35,973 --> 00:16:39,673
a man gets the itch -
a man has to scratch.
203
00:16:46,133 --> 00:16:49,833
Feel better now?
I'm just glad it's over!
204
00:16:49,833 --> 00:16:55,973
You know what it's like -
it's never so bad once it happens. It's the waiting!
205
00:17:10,713 --> 00:17:12,513
BANG!
206
00:17:19,353 --> 00:17:21,413
How do, lads!
207
00:17:21,413 --> 00:17:26,013
He just appears in a puff of smoke!
How do you do that, Wesley?
208
00:17:26,013 --> 00:17:28,073
It's Aladdin!
209
00:17:28,073 --> 00:17:31,913
Should you be breathing
all that smoke, Wesley?
210
00:17:31,913 --> 00:17:34,573
What smoke? That's not smoke!
211
00:17:34,573 --> 00:17:38,373
That's just an engine breathing.
They're only human.
212
00:17:38,373 --> 00:17:43,333
You can't say that about the one
for whom we're seeking a favour.
213
00:17:43,333 --> 00:17:47,553
Yesterday was favours -
today is work on me engine.
214
00:17:47,553 --> 00:17:49,533
Now, Wesley...
215
00:17:51,953 --> 00:17:54,013
Wesley...
216
00:17:54,013 --> 00:17:59,813
How would you like to join me in
developing a small, secret bicycle?
217
00:18:00,953 --> 00:18:02,913
Is he serious?
218
00:18:02,913 --> 00:18:04,713
Serious?
219
00:18:04,713 --> 00:18:06,973
Incurable!
220
00:18:06,973 --> 00:18:12,873
Let's say if he's left his brain
to science, they'll want a refund.
221
00:18:12,873 --> 00:18:18,513
Pay no attention to the lower ranks.
They're dazzled by my ingenuity.
222
00:18:18,513 --> 00:18:20,933
You can do it, Wesley!
223
00:18:20,933 --> 00:18:24,553
I haven't got an old bicycle
to work on!
224
00:18:24,553 --> 00:18:27,533
But HE has - little tatty-britches!
225
00:18:31,073 --> 00:18:33,153
Right, I'm coming.
226
00:18:33,153 --> 00:18:34,913
No, to ME!
227
00:18:34,913 --> 00:18:36,773
Hang on!
228
00:18:36,773 --> 00:18:41,693
The pedal's stuck and I don't want
any enquiries as to where.
229
00:18:41,693 --> 00:18:46,333
My end's a bit rusty
and this bicycle's not much better.
230
00:18:46,333 --> 00:18:51,153
This end's rusty, too. It's a bit
damp here in this wash house.
231
00:18:51,153 --> 00:18:53,793
Well, it's not through overuse!
232
00:18:54,973 --> 00:18:57,753
HE PANTS AND SPLUTTERS
233
00:19:00,713 --> 00:19:02,553
My word!
234
00:19:02,553 --> 00:19:05,373
This'll be a challenge for Wesley!
235
00:19:05,373 --> 00:19:10,033
I'm not so sure I want Wesley
let loose on this bike.
236
00:19:10,033 --> 00:19:17,253
At least you're a matching set -
you and your bicycle - it's clear you belong together.
237
00:19:17,253 --> 00:19:20,773
We've been through
some rough times together.
238
00:19:20,773 --> 00:19:23,153
You're both dressed for it!
239
00:19:25,293 --> 00:19:29,473
SQUEAK, SQUEAK
Can't you shut it up, man?
240
00:19:29,473 --> 00:19:31,793
Talk to it or something!
241
00:19:33,273 --> 00:19:35,273
Shut up!
242
00:20:04,733 --> 00:20:07,213
Can't we put it down a minute?
243
00:20:07,213 --> 00:20:12,273
No, we can't put it down. Not while
it's making this dreadful noise.
244
00:20:14,653 --> 00:20:18,053
Well,
I'm gonna put it down a minute.
245
00:20:18,053 --> 00:20:22,073
My arm aches.
Just your arm?! Lucky you!
246
00:20:23,613 --> 00:20:27,133
I mean...
I'm not carrying it any more.
247
00:20:27,133 --> 00:20:30,653
Does it matter if it makes
a bit of noise?
248
00:20:30,653 --> 00:20:34,653
Suit yourself.
Try to pretend you're not with us.
249
00:20:34,653 --> 00:20:38,593
Come on, Clegg.
I hate walking with squeaky people.
250
00:20:39,653 --> 00:20:41,693
Come on!
251
00:20:41,693 --> 00:20:44,193
SQUEAKING RESUMES
252
00:20:48,413 --> 00:20:51,933
So you finally
snapped and seized his bicycle?
253
00:20:51,933 --> 00:20:55,633
There comes a time
when woman can do no less.
254
00:20:55,633 --> 00:20:58,133
How long you planning on keeping it?
255
00:20:58,133 --> 00:21:01,833
Till he earns time off
for good behaviour.
256
00:21:01,833 --> 00:21:04,813
Sometimes you have to be firm!
257
00:21:04,813 --> 00:21:07,773
You'd have no trouble
being that!
258
00:21:07,773 --> 00:21:11,213
I've been fairly good
at being firm.
259
00:21:11,213 --> 00:21:14,513
You've been damned good
at being firm!
260
00:21:16,213 --> 00:21:21,613
If I confiscated Barry's bicycle,
it'd be months before he'd notice!
261
00:21:21,613 --> 00:21:24,133
You've got to get him
where it hurts!
262
00:21:24,133 --> 00:21:27,613
I once took father's socket set.
Why?
263
00:21:27,613 --> 00:21:30,793
You'll learn one day,
my girl.
264
00:21:30,793 --> 00:21:33,213
When wedded bliss wears off,
265
00:21:33,213 --> 00:21:36,813
you can get a lot of leverage
with a socket set.
266
00:21:36,813 --> 00:21:41,273
When mine got restless,
I'd hide his motorcycle coat.
267
00:21:41,273 --> 00:21:44,513
Did it work?
No, it didn't always work.
268
00:21:44,513 --> 00:21:47,333
Sometimes he'd go out, anyway,
269
00:21:47,333 --> 00:21:51,853
but at least he'd come home blue
and too frozen to argue!
270
00:21:51,853 --> 00:21:54,433
I can't imagine
your Wally blue.
271
00:21:54,433 --> 00:21:55,953
No...
272
00:21:55,953 --> 00:21:58,393
it wasn't a pretty sight.
273
00:21:59,653 --> 00:22:04,513
Mine goes pink. Every time
he lies you get this bright pink.
274
00:22:04,513 --> 00:22:10,913
It's not bad in the bedroom,
but downstairs it clashes terrible with the wallpaper!
275
00:22:10,913 --> 00:22:13,693
My Barry's mainly pink.
276
00:22:13,693 --> 00:22:17,053
Your father's an oily colour.
So what?
277
00:22:17,053 --> 00:22:21,953
No more details about your Barry,
thank you. Drink your coffee.
278
00:22:21,953 --> 00:22:24,133
Oh, mother!
279
00:22:32,133 --> 00:22:37,413
Do you think Wesley CAN turn
an old bike into a secret bicycle?
280
00:22:37,413 --> 00:22:42,273
Oh, yes, yes. The hard part will be
getting rid of the squeak.
281
00:22:42,273 --> 00:22:44,653
It were just a squeak.
282
00:22:44,653 --> 00:22:49,793
It wasn't just a squeak - it was
the ultimate deterrent of a squeak.
283
00:22:49,793 --> 00:22:53,753
You could rule the world
with a squeak like that!
284
00:22:53,753 --> 00:22:56,413
Not that anybody would want to!
285
00:22:56,413 --> 00:23:01,493
Can you imagine anybody wanting
to rule something like the world?!
286
00:23:03,113 --> 00:23:05,933
I bet the pay's good.
287
00:23:05,933 --> 00:23:11,153
Is it fair - us being out here
while Wesley's doing all the work?
288
00:23:11,153 --> 00:23:13,553
Oh, yes! Perfectly fair!
289
00:23:13,553 --> 00:23:16,453
I mean, I do all the planning.
290
00:23:16,453 --> 00:23:20,133
I just give him
a few simple jobs to do.
291
00:23:20,133 --> 00:23:23,893
It makes him feel wanted.
He loves it, really.
292
00:23:23,893 --> 00:23:27,293
We're doing him a kindness.
Absolutely!
293
00:23:27,293 --> 00:23:32,213
It feels good to realise that
you're spreading a little happiness.
294
00:23:32,213 --> 00:23:34,793
That's what leadership is all about.
295
00:23:34,793 --> 00:23:36,413
Aha!
296
00:23:50,153 --> 00:23:52,353
How do, lads!
297
00:23:52,353 --> 00:23:55,553
What about our little project,
Wesley?
298
00:23:55,553 --> 00:23:59,053
Have you done anything?
Have I done anything?
299
00:23:59,053 --> 00:24:01,673
A stroke of genius, that's all!
300
00:24:01,673 --> 00:24:06,753
You wanted a secret bicycle -
you've got a secret bicycle!
301
00:24:06,753 --> 00:24:10,713
Well done, that man!
Can we have a look at it?
302
00:24:10,713 --> 00:24:15,193
Can't see it, can ya?
How's that for a secret bicycle?!
303
00:24:22,213 --> 00:24:25,753
All right,
I'll put you out of your misery,
304
00:24:25,753 --> 00:24:28,313
otherwise you'll never find it!
305
00:24:28,313 --> 00:24:30,693
It's here!
306
00:24:30,693 --> 00:24:34,193
Disguised
as your small landscaped hillock!
307
00:24:35,233 --> 00:24:36,693
Look!
308
00:24:41,953 --> 00:24:45,093
Ah... Everyone should have one!
309
00:24:45,093 --> 00:24:48,693
What kind of a pillock rides
a small hillock?!
310
00:24:50,013 --> 00:24:55,133
We really wanted something more
lightweight and portable, you know.
311
00:24:55,133 --> 00:24:58,613
Something he could assemble
in seconds.
312
00:24:58,613 --> 00:25:02,053
Nobody mentioned
"lightweight and portable"!
313
00:25:02,053 --> 00:25:05,993
"Secret bicycle" -
that's what you said!
314
00:25:05,993 --> 00:25:08,893
It'll never work, any road!
315
00:25:11,393 --> 00:25:13,493
PANTING
316
00:25:13,493 --> 00:25:17,293
WOMAN:
You'll have to do something, Howard.
317
00:25:17,293 --> 00:25:23,873
HOWARD: I've got men working on it
right now, making a secret bicycle.
318
00:25:23,873 --> 00:25:26,513
I'm glad about that, Howard.
319
00:25:29,093 --> 00:25:33,693
This is as close as we've been
for ages, Howard!
320
00:25:33,693 --> 00:25:37,213
But I'd like to have the breath
to enjoy it!
321
00:25:40,173 --> 00:25:44,873
Now remember, nothing fancy
until you get the hang of it.
322
00:25:44,873 --> 00:25:47,733
I bet you never thought
323
00:25:47,733 --> 00:25:52,493
you'd grow up to be the first
human being to ride a hill!
324
00:25:52,493 --> 00:25:57,713
She'll be all right, will that!
She's a little gem, is that.
325
00:26:11,653 --> 00:26:15,733
..add a pinch of paprika
and pop it under the grill.
326
00:26:17,753 --> 00:26:19,593
How long?
327
00:26:19,593 --> 00:26:23,573
15 minutes,
or until it's crisp and brown.
328
00:26:23,573 --> 00:26:27,633
Divorce has really opened up
your life, ain't it?
329
00:26:27,633 --> 00:26:29,893
It has, actually.
330
00:26:29,893 --> 00:26:33,533
I'm altogether
a much more rounded person.
331
00:26:33,533 --> 00:26:38,653
My only regret is I wish I could do
it without actually losing the wife.
332
00:26:40,133 --> 00:26:44,913
I'm having a washing-up party
on Thursday, how are you fixed?
333
00:26:44,913 --> 00:26:46,873
Busy.
334
00:26:46,873 --> 00:26:49,513
You said that last time.
335
00:27:43,313 --> 00:27:45,873
Agh...aagh...a-a-aagh!
336
00:28:01,833 --> 00:28:04,353
It were like a rabbit hole!
337
00:28:04,353 --> 00:28:09,153
You went to pieces, man.
You lost control of your hill!
338
00:28:09,153 --> 00:28:12,873
It made you feel quite HILL.
It did, it did!
339
00:28:12,923 --> 00:28:17,473
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