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1
00:00:40,080 --> 00:00:44,960
Slow thaself down!
I think his legs have got longer.
2
00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:49,880
You're out of condition.
I was born out of condition.
3
00:00:49,880 --> 00:00:54,480
Nature intended me
for out of condition
4
00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:59,940
as an encouragement for all
of Her creatures who are bone-idle.
5
00:00:59,940 --> 00:01:03,020
Well, you're back in good hands.
6
00:01:03,020 --> 00:01:09,380
It's not me hands
I'm worried about. Just slow tha legs down a bit!
7
00:01:09,380 --> 00:01:12,480
Maybe he's got the wrong pair.
8
00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:17,440
You know what the army's like.
I bet they gave him the wrong pair.
9
00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:32,100
I see Howard is still
confined to barracks. He keeps getting caught.
10
00:01:32,100 --> 00:01:35,180
For what? For being a pillock.
11
00:01:35,180 --> 00:01:40,440
Is he still...? You know,
knocking about with that...? Yes.
12
00:01:40,440 --> 00:01:45,280
She terrifies me. I don't know
how he's got the nerve.
13
00:01:45,280 --> 00:01:50,200
Mind you, living with Pearl,
he'd have to have some nerve.
14
00:01:51,380 --> 00:01:53,940
How do, Howard?
15
00:01:53,940 --> 00:01:56,720
Don't ask!
16
00:01:56,720 --> 00:02:01,960
You missed a bit in that corner,
Howard. Oh, heck, is he back?
17
00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:07,480
You think you have trouble? We have
him all the time. But I have Pearl.
18
00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:14,800
She's good to you
when you're poorly. Not good. More like efficient.
19
00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:19,000
Are you still knocking
about with...?
20
00:02:19,000 --> 00:02:24,660
Yes, he is!
I don't know what you mean.
21
00:02:24,660 --> 00:02:28,080
I just told him he'd missed a bit.
22
00:02:28,080 --> 00:02:32,200
And I'll make sure
he keeps missing a bit.
23
00:02:36,960 --> 00:02:40,720
I wouldn't mind if she didn't dress
like such a tart.
24
00:02:40,720 --> 00:02:43,340
Yes, you would.
25
00:02:43,340 --> 00:02:46,080
I suppose I would.
26
00:03:10,120 --> 00:03:14,920
Why do people resent advice
from a natural leader?
27
00:03:14,920 --> 00:03:19,660
I'd understand if it was
from an interfering idiot.
28
00:03:19,660 --> 00:03:27,260
Maybe they can't tell
the difference. I can never tell the difference.
29
00:03:27,260 --> 00:03:35,260
I wear a collar and tie. My shoes
are always polished. How dare people not tell the difference?
30
00:03:35,260 --> 00:03:42,040
More tea, Foggy? Oh, no, thank you!
I keep a tight rein on my appetites.
31
00:03:42,040 --> 00:03:48,960
It's only tea!
It won't turn tha' reckless and start spending tha money.
32
00:03:48,960 --> 00:03:52,040
You don't understand, do you?
33
00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:57,000
It's all part of self-discipline.
The warrior's creed.
34
00:03:57,000 --> 00:04:01,040
I suppose
it's the old Samurai Code.
35
00:04:01,040 --> 00:04:05,460
One has a duty to keep the body
ready for anything.
36
00:04:05,460 --> 00:04:08,120
Nora Batty.
37
00:04:09,680 --> 00:04:14,900
Well, almost anything. She's still
pretty fierce, isn't she?
38
00:04:14,900 --> 00:04:17,940
Only to people she knows.
39
00:04:17,940 --> 00:04:22,320
To strangers she's still quite...
miserable.
40
00:04:22,320 --> 00:04:28,060
She's not much of a smiler, is
Nora. She's straight all the way.
41
00:04:28,060 --> 00:04:31,040
And that's only the front!
42
00:04:51,420 --> 00:04:54,340
Will you stop that?
43
00:04:54,340 --> 00:04:58,620
He should be on a lead, you know.
44
00:04:58,620 --> 00:05:01,660
Relax, Foggy. Who cares?
45
00:05:01,660 --> 00:05:04,660
Who's watching any road?
46
00:05:04,660 --> 00:05:07,740
I am watching.
47
00:05:07,740 --> 00:05:13,680
It offends my sense
of what is fitting in this beautiful landscape.
48
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:20,300
What have you repaired
that hole with? Which one?
49
00:05:20,300 --> 00:05:24,280
DON'T ask me to look.
50
00:05:26,440 --> 00:05:30,060
Don't pull at them!
They'll fall to bits.
51
00:05:30,060 --> 00:05:37,580
One false move and they'll be off
like a... What have you repaired that one with?
52
00:05:37,580 --> 00:05:41,840
THIS one? Sticky tape.
53
00:05:41,840 --> 00:05:45,940
And they say
you can never find the end!
54
00:05:45,940 --> 00:05:53,120
What's wrong with needle
and thread? I haven't got any needle and thread!
55
00:05:53,120 --> 00:05:57,820
What good is sticky tape?
It keeps the draught out.
56
00:05:58,920 --> 00:06:03,820
Ye gods! I wouldn't mind,
if it wasn't transparent.
57
00:06:03,820 --> 00:06:06,860
It's a helluva place for a window!
58
00:06:06,860 --> 00:06:09,560
Double-glazing!
59
00:06:09,560 --> 00:06:14,320
He's invented
the first double-glazed trousers!
60
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:25,460
Exhaustion is a state of mind.
61
00:06:25,460 --> 00:06:28,400
Pay no attention to it.
62
00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:33,120
You have to drive yourself
through the pain barrier.
63
00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:38,160
I've spent a lifetime driving
myself through the pain barrier.
64
00:06:38,160 --> 00:06:44,100
I'll prove to you how much further
you can drive yourself...
65
00:06:46,060 --> 00:06:53,540
The secret on a route march
is steady breathing adapted to the marching pace.
66
00:06:53,540 --> 00:06:57,120
Just take your example from me.
67
00:07:18,420 --> 00:07:21,380
Why do people yawn?
68
00:07:22,420 --> 00:07:25,720
I blame it on the television.
69
00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:32,160
Get some rhythm into it!
70
00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:37,360
Ah, you can feel it doing you good.
Nothing like a good, brisk march.
71
00:07:37,360 --> 00:07:42,500
I've led some marches in my time.
Even in the heat of Burma.
72
00:07:42,500 --> 00:07:49,200
The little hill men called me
"Walking Giant". They were little fellows.
73
00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:53,800
They used to say,
"Here comes Walking Giant."
74
00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:58,600
I believe they named one or two
of their babies after me.
75
00:07:58,600 --> 00:08:03,520
I thought of stopping out there
to teach them copperplate writing.
76
00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:16,620
I saw Tuggy Marshall in the post
office. He had Nelly with him.
77
00:08:16,620 --> 00:08:19,520
She were licking his ear.
78
00:08:19,520 --> 00:08:24,460
I didn't think Mrs Marshall was
all that affectionate.
79
00:08:24,460 --> 00:08:27,260
Not Mrs Marshall!
80
00:08:27,260 --> 00:08:30,820
Nelly is his Jack Russell terrier.
81
00:08:30,820 --> 00:08:35,140
I thought it didn't sound
like Mrs Marshall.
82
00:08:35,660 --> 00:08:38,700
Got a bad leg, so he told me.
83
00:08:38,700 --> 00:08:41,720
And Nelly's still licking him.
84
00:08:42,820 --> 00:08:47,340
Can't get his boot on.
Has to wear a slipper.
85
00:08:47,340 --> 00:08:51,220
He told you all this in the queue?
86
00:08:51,220 --> 00:08:53,460
Yep!
87
00:08:53,460 --> 00:08:57,640
He enjoys a bit of illness,
does Tuggy.
88
00:08:57,640 --> 00:09:02,920
DISTANT SHOUT
What's that?
89
00:09:02,920 --> 00:09:06,940
Maybe it's Tuggy
with another bad leg.
90
00:09:06,940 --> 00:09:13,000
FOGGY IS SHOUTING
91
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:18,580
Tha'll be all right when tha's been
through the pain barrier(!)
92
00:09:26,420 --> 00:09:32,440
He'll come in,
pretending he enjoyed it. He loves a good march(!)
93
00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:36,420
He had a good one today.
Here he comes.
94
00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:42,880
He looks absolutely knackered.
95
00:09:42,880 --> 00:09:50,180
Only from the neck down. Shout him.
Watch how he pretends he enjoys it.
96
00:09:50,180 --> 00:09:52,440
Foggy!
97
00:10:11,020 --> 00:10:19,140
I think the trouble these days is
they just let them run loose without any thought of punishment.
98
00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:26,300
Yes. It's no good just confining
them. They should be made to do useful work.
99
00:10:26,300 --> 00:10:33,180
Are they capable of useful work?
Under the right supervision. Yes.
100
00:10:33,180 --> 00:10:39,400
There's nobody trickier to manage
than the average husband. That's true!
101
00:10:39,400 --> 00:10:43,540
I thought you were talking
about criminals.
102
00:10:43,540 --> 00:10:47,120
It's easy to get them confused.
103
00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:51,840
It's as if you think
husbands should be punished.
104
00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:56,000
You can't just let them do
what they want,
105
00:10:56,000 --> 00:11:00,760
because they're cuddly
and wag their tails occasionally.
106
00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:07,900
What's the use of them being
married, if they don't know it?
107
00:11:08,820 --> 00:11:11,880
You have to keep the pressure on.
108
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:17,220
What makes men unreliable?
Practice.
109
00:11:17,220 --> 00:11:20,260
I blame a lot of it on diet.
110
00:11:20,260 --> 00:11:23,460
Food today isn't stodgy enough.
111
00:11:23,460 --> 00:11:31,540
In my day, you fed your man right
and he couldn't move fast enough to get into serious mischief.
112
00:11:31,540 --> 00:11:34,580
I feed mine, but he cycles it off.
113
00:11:34,580 --> 00:11:39,580
Every time he comes home, he's got
lipstick on his bicycle clips.
114
00:11:40,860 --> 00:11:49,120
How is your Barry? He's half-asleep
most of the time. That's good. You must be feeding him right!
115
00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:54,400
Well, she's been raised
in the finest culinary tradition.
116
00:11:54,400 --> 00:12:00,040
I've started him jogging. Does he
like jogging? He HATES jogging.
117
00:12:05,240 --> 00:12:10,960
You know what went wrong out there
today, don't you? Tha' got lost.
118
00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:17,020
Rubbish! I have a built-in sense
of terrain. What's terrain, Norm?
119
00:12:17,020 --> 00:12:23,840
You must have heard it.
"The terrain now standing at No.3 platform..."
120
00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:29,200
What was wrong was the loss of
communication. We lost contact.
121
00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:33,820
Well, not any more.
I know the answer.
122
00:12:33,820 --> 00:12:36,760
Portable radios.
123
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:59,820
Portable radios?
You know, little things you hold in your hand.
124
00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:08,640
Well, come along. Get your radios.
125
00:13:16,860 --> 00:13:22,160
COMPO AND CLEGG HUFF AND PUFF
126
00:13:22,160 --> 00:13:27,920
Portable radios - "little things
you can hold in your hand"(!)
127
00:13:27,920 --> 00:13:32,960
I got the pair of them ridiculously
cheap. An absolute snip.
128
00:13:32,960 --> 00:13:37,800
I can't tell you how glad we are
to hear that(!)
129
00:13:37,800 --> 00:13:42,900
You do realise with these things we
need never be out of contact again?
130
00:13:42,900 --> 00:13:45,380
Oh, goody(!)
131
00:13:51,460 --> 00:13:58,980
I'm not packing this thing about
all day! One more of these and we've got Broadcasting House.
132
00:13:58,980 --> 00:14:06,320
You'll soon get used to
any little inconvenience. That's what they said about marriage.
133
00:14:13,440 --> 00:14:18,175
Watch the valves.
Don't damage the valves!
134
00:14:19,255 --> 00:14:21,475
I think they damaged the valves.
135
00:14:21,475 --> 00:14:24,535
Damaged the valves? What about us!?
136
00:14:24,535 --> 00:14:31,155
You feel like a turtle - flipped
onto your back and unable to get back up.
137
00:14:31,155 --> 00:14:36,495
I'm kicking me legs in the air
with 43 switches up me jumper.
138
00:14:37,555 --> 00:14:40,895
I never thought I'd be on radio.
139
00:14:43,235 --> 00:14:48,335
Can you repair it, Wesley?
I'm not sure. That's comforting(!)
140
00:14:48,335 --> 00:14:54,255
Well, it's not like an engine.
You know me, I'm best with engines.
141
00:14:55,635 --> 00:14:59,695
He can't repair it.
Let's forget it.
142
00:14:59,695 --> 00:15:04,795
Put it down to experience
and forget about portable radios.
143
00:15:04,795 --> 00:15:09,135
We're not stopping
at the first setback.
144
00:15:11,795 --> 00:15:16,615
Well, that was the second.
Can we stop at the second?
145
00:15:17,795 --> 00:15:21,835
There's still some life
in the beast!
146
00:15:21,835 --> 00:15:25,495
That's what I tell Nora Batty.
147
00:15:30,255 --> 00:15:35,775
This is Sunray Major calling.
Can you hear me, Wesley? Over.
148
00:15:35,775 --> 00:15:39,735
RADIO BUZZES
149
00:15:41,255 --> 00:15:47,035
This is Sunray Major calling.
Can you hear me, Wesley? Over.
150
00:15:47,035 --> 00:15:51,255
RADIO CRACKLES
151
00:15:51,255 --> 00:15:57,435
This is Sunray Major calling.
Can you hear me, Wesley? OVER.
152
00:15:57,435 --> 00:16:05,075
If there's one thing dafter than
a twit called Foggy, it's a twit called Foggy talking to himself!
153
00:16:05,075 --> 00:16:09,815
But very nicely. I mean,
doesn't he speak nicely?
154
00:16:12,115 --> 00:16:16,655
It's the aerial, you see.
We need more aerial.
155
00:16:32,455 --> 00:16:36,415
I am sorry.
I was pulling this out...
156
00:16:37,535 --> 00:16:41,315
Hey! Stop! Come back! Stop!
157
00:16:41,315 --> 00:16:45,215
Help! Come back!
158
00:16:50,115 --> 00:16:56,815
Did it work? It worked a treat(!)
The biggest laugh I've had for years.
159
00:16:56,815 --> 00:17:02,475
Did you hear me calling you? No.
Then you've not mended it.
160
00:17:02,475 --> 00:17:08,815
It's not like an engine.
Get it on your back and it feels like an engine.
161
00:17:09,875 --> 00:17:13,255
CLATTER
162
00:17:15,075 --> 00:17:18,095
All right, have another try.
163
00:17:22,135 --> 00:17:29,875
You're really getting the hang
of that bit, Wesley(!) Give it some hammer like tha' usually does.
164
00:17:29,875 --> 00:17:32,915
Put that thing down at once!
165
00:17:32,915 --> 00:17:38,855
You don't seem to understand. These
are hi-tech precision instruments.
166
00:17:53,255 --> 00:17:57,915
You two men stay here
and keep a listening watch.
167
00:17:57,915 --> 00:18:03,095
I'll give you further instructions
by radio. Any questions?
168
00:18:03,095 --> 00:18:07,115
What makes Nora Batty
so attractive?
169
00:18:07,115 --> 00:18:11,735
Keep your mind from wandering.
It could be that!
170
00:18:11,735 --> 00:18:15,655
Stay here and wait for my message.
171
00:18:23,375 --> 00:18:27,935
Now, Howard?
Do you think it's safe, love?
172
00:18:27,935 --> 00:18:34,515
If it's not safe here,
when can we nip off the road for a cuddle?
173
00:18:34,515 --> 00:18:39,175
You never know
if you're being watched.
174
00:18:39,175 --> 00:18:45,195
Who's watching us here?
There's such a thing as spy satellites.
175
00:18:45,195 --> 00:18:49,695
They can read
a label from 50 miles.
176
00:18:49,695 --> 00:18:56,695
I don't care.
All they'll be able to see is "Hand Wash Only".
177
00:18:58,695 --> 00:19:05,695
Why don't we go
a bit further, love? Funny you should say that.
178
00:19:16,015 --> 00:19:24,295
This is Sunray Major calling.
Are you receiving me? Are you receiving me? Over.
179
00:19:24,295 --> 00:19:28,475
RADIO CRACKLES
180
00:19:30,235 --> 00:19:35,495
This is Sunray Major calling.
Sunray Major calling.
181
00:19:35,495 --> 00:19:38,415
Hello. Hello!
182
00:19:38,855 --> 00:19:41,835
FOGGY!
183
00:19:44,235 --> 00:19:49,275
Not a peep! I bet he didn't pay
more than a pound each for these!
184
00:19:49,275 --> 00:19:52,175
And even then he were done.
185
00:19:52,175 --> 00:19:57,195
This is the age of the microchip.
These look more like the oven.
186
00:19:58,235 --> 00:20:00,855
Hello. Foggy?
187
00:20:00,855 --> 00:20:03,555
Foggy! Foggy! Hello! Hello! Awww!
188
00:20:24,655 --> 00:20:29,855
Oh, Howard!
We should be all right here.
189
00:20:29,855 --> 00:20:32,835
There can't be anybody round here.
190
00:20:34,535 --> 00:20:37,035
Oh, Howard!
191
00:20:41,715 --> 00:20:44,775
'You two, are you listening?
192
00:20:44,775 --> 00:20:48,535
'Don't just fiddle with your dials!
193
00:20:48,535 --> 00:20:51,315
'Say something!'
194
00:20:58,795 --> 00:21:01,795
It may have done it some good.
195
00:21:01,795 --> 00:21:07,835
It didn't fall on concrete. It just
slid down the grass a bit. A LOT!
196
00:21:10,655 --> 00:21:14,395
Hello, Howard.
It's a lie!
197
00:21:20,275 --> 00:21:24,595
I'm glad she's gone.
She scares me to death.
198
00:21:24,595 --> 00:21:31,655
She makes me feel like a dressed
chicken and she's somebody with spare stuffing.
199
00:21:31,655 --> 00:21:37,815
Marina's all right.
She's just desperate. Where's the wireless?
200
00:21:37,815 --> 00:21:40,775
It must be here somewhere. There!
201
00:21:51,635 --> 00:21:54,395
Whoops! Whoops!
202
00:21:59,195 --> 00:22:02,275
Ah, well, it's not a total loss.
203
00:22:02,275 --> 00:22:06,155
The aerial's still
in working order.
204
00:22:08,275 --> 00:22:13,295
Foggy will go mad. Maybe
he won't notice from a distance.
205
00:22:13,295 --> 00:22:18,115
Keep still ! There's
a funny bit sticking out here.
206
00:22:18,115 --> 00:22:22,135
That's me!
Sorry.
207
00:22:22,135 --> 00:22:26,995
Can't you straighten up?
Not without an anaesthetic.
208
00:22:26,995 --> 00:22:31,795
He needs something soft
next to his skin.
209
00:22:33,115 --> 00:22:35,955
I'm game, if you are!
210
00:22:35,955 --> 00:22:44,755
He'll take advantage of you.
It's just that you feel obliged to do what you can in an emergency.
211
00:22:55,275 --> 00:22:59,955
The only thing that would make
Foggy feel any better
212
00:22:59,955 --> 00:23:06,475
is if we could make him believe
that it's been damaged in a good cause.
213
00:23:11,275 --> 00:23:15,775
I don't know!
You give them a simple task.
214
00:23:15,775 --> 00:23:20,335
I'll bet they've tuned
to the wrong frequency.
215
00:23:20,335 --> 00:23:27,975
And I'm here like a muffin, saying,
"This is Sunray Major". And they'll have tuned to the wrong frequency.
216
00:23:27,975 --> 00:23:35,135
Unless there's something wrong
with their radio. It's a perfectly good radio.
217
00:23:53,675 --> 00:23:58,855
Well, where's the other radio?
He's still testing it.
218
00:24:03,415 --> 00:24:10,015
Why is he walking like that?
Like what? As though he's twisted something.
219
00:24:10,015 --> 00:24:13,375
Why is he walking backwards?
220
00:24:13,375 --> 00:24:16,215
To get better reception.
221
00:24:18,255 --> 00:24:24,275
His radio looks funny. (Be quiet!
You only know about engines.)
222
00:24:32,195 --> 00:24:36,835
This is Sunray Major calling.
Can you hear me? Over.
223
00:24:41,455 --> 00:24:44,555
There you are! He can hear you.
224
00:24:44,555 --> 00:24:50,615
But why doesn't he use the radio?
Give him time. We've been at it all day.
225
00:24:50,615 --> 00:24:57,955
Yes, but he knows we've only been
practising. He'll react quicker, if there's an emergency.
226
00:24:57,955 --> 00:25:02,535
What sort of emergency?
You never know, do you?
227
00:25:02,535 --> 00:25:09,215
Anything could happen.
You never know when there might be an emergency.
228
00:25:09,215 --> 00:25:13,515
Help! HELP!
229
00:25:13,515 --> 00:25:18,495
Huh! There it is! LOOK!
There's an emergency.
230
00:25:18,495 --> 00:25:22,655
No brakes. No BRAKES.
231
00:25:22,655 --> 00:25:26,335
No BRAKES! Help!
232
00:25:26,335 --> 00:25:31,235
There you are, you see.
An emergency!
233
00:25:31,235 --> 00:25:34,395
Help!
234
00:25:34,395 --> 00:25:39,575
But never mind. Compo will throw
himself bravely into her path.
235
00:25:39,575 --> 00:25:43,095
This is NOT Sunray Major.
236
00:25:43,095 --> 00:25:48,795
This is NOT Sunray Major.
Marina has got no brakes.
237
00:25:48,795 --> 00:25:53,635
Can you stop her? Throw yourself
into her path bravely.
238
00:26:04,875 --> 00:26:07,195
Help!
239
00:26:10,795 --> 00:26:13,875
CRASH
240
00:26:13,875 --> 00:26:16,715
I believe he's done it.
241
00:26:16,715 --> 00:26:21,515
I believe he's thrown himself
into her path bravely.
242
00:26:42,235 --> 00:26:47,075
He saved me. He SAVED me!
243
00:26:47,075 --> 00:26:49,655
How brave!
244
00:26:49,655 --> 00:26:52,175
How brave, eh?
245
00:26:52,175 --> 00:26:57,795
Although... I'm afraid
he may have damaged the radio.
246
00:27:06,275 --> 00:27:12,275
Is he holding her too tight? I never
interfere with things like THAT!
247
00:27:12,275 --> 00:27:16,075
I think he's holding her too tight.
248
00:27:31,235 --> 00:27:35,895
How does it feel,
being crushed by a Marina?
249
00:27:35,895 --> 00:27:38,915
Not unpleasant at the time.
250
00:27:38,915 --> 00:27:44,055
Amazing how much damage she did
to my radio. I had to save her!
251
00:27:44,055 --> 00:27:47,215
Bravest thing I've ever seen.
252
00:27:47,215 --> 00:27:54,575
Send him off with a whole radio
and all he comes back with is a length of limp aerial!
253
00:28:46,115 --> 00:28:52,095
Subtitles by Audrey Flynn
BBC - 1990
254
00:28:52,145 --> 00:28:56,695
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
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