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[Bell Tolling]
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♪ Don't be shy ♪
3
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♪ Just let your feelings roll on by ♪
4
00:01:33,297 --> 00:01:35,757
♪ And don't wear fear ♪
5
00:01:35,883 --> 00:01:38,885
♪ Or nobody will know you're there ♪
6
00:01:40,388 --> 00:01:42,514
♪ Just lift your head ♪
7
00:01:43,182 --> 00:01:46,351
♪ And let your feelings out instead ♪
8
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♪ And don't be shy ♪
9
00:01:50,106 --> 00:01:53,358
♪ Just let your feelings roll on by ♪
10
00:01:54,443 --> 00:01:57,028
♪ On by, on by ♪
11
00:01:57,738 --> 00:02:00,865
♪ You know, love ♪
12
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:04,828
♪ Is better than a song ♪
13
00:02:05,705 --> 00:02:08,039
♪ Love is where ♪
14
00:02:08,207 --> 00:02:11,209
♪ All of us belong ♪
15
00:02:12,628 --> 00:02:14,921
♪ So don't be shy ♪
16
00:02:15,047 --> 00:02:18,550
♪ Just let
your feelings roll on by ♪
17
00:02:19,760 --> 00:02:22,137
♪ And don't wear fear ♪
18
00:02:22,263 --> 00:02:26,391
♪ Or nobody
will know you're there ♪
19
00:02:26,517 --> 00:02:29,352
♪ That you're there, you're there ♪
20
00:02:29,478 --> 00:02:32,772
♪ You're there,
you're there, you're there ♪
21
00:02:32,898 --> 00:02:39,779
♪ You're there, you're there ♪
22
00:02:55,379 --> 00:02:57,589
♪ Don't be shy ♪
23
00:02:57,757 --> 00:03:01,092
♪ Just let your feelings roll on by ♪
24
00:03:02,303 --> 00:03:04,637
♪ And don't wear fear ♪
25
00:03:04,764 --> 00:03:07,974
♪ Or nobody will know you're there ♪
26
00:03:09,143 --> 00:03:11,853
♪ Just lift your head ♪
27
00:03:11,979 --> 00:03:15,482
♪ And let
your feelings out instead ♪
28
00:03:16,609 --> 00:03:19,110
♪ No, don't be shy ♪
29
00:03:19,236 --> 00:03:23,114
♪ Just let your feelings roll on by ♪
30
00:03:23,240 --> 00:03:26,284
♪ On by, on by ♪
31
00:03:26,410 --> 00:03:29,829
♪ Oh, on by, on by, on by ♪
32
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♪ On by, on by ♪
33
00:03:33,459 --> 00:03:36,961
♪ On by, on by ♪♪
34
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[Footsteps Approaching]
35
00:04:02,196 --> 00:04:04,155
[Door Unlocks, Opens]
36
00:04:30,224 --> 00:04:32,934
I suppose you think
that's very funny, Harold.
37
00:04:36,564 --> 00:04:38,523
- Hello?
- [Man] Hello?
38
00:04:38,691 --> 00:04:40,024
- Fay?
- Yes?
39
00:04:40,192 --> 00:04:44,112
Darling, be a dear and cancel
my appointment with René this afternoon.
40
00:04:48,409 --> 00:04:50,910
- [Choking]
- I know he'll be furious...
41
00:04:51,036 --> 00:04:53,204
but I've had such a trying day.
42
00:04:53,372 --> 00:04:57,208
And with guests coming this evening.
Oh, would you? That's sweet.
43
00:04:57,376 --> 00:04:59,210
[Choking Continues]
44
00:04:59,378 --> 00:05:02,547
Tell him I promise
to be in on Tuesday.
45
00:05:02,673 --> 00:05:04,924
Thank you, Fay.
You're a darling.
46
00:05:05,050 --> 00:05:07,552
Yes. Bye.
47
00:05:07,720 --> 00:05:09,637
Bye.
48
00:05:10,723 --> 00:05:13,182
[Choking Gasp]
49
00:05:13,309 --> 00:05:16,352
Oh. Dinner at 8:00, Harold.
50
00:05:16,478 --> 00:05:19,731
And do try and be
a little more vivacious.
51
00:05:32,244 --> 00:05:36,247
Of course, you know, Harold's father
had a similar sense of the absurd.
52
00:05:36,415 --> 00:05:39,918
I remember once in Paris,
he just stepped out for cigarettes...
53
00:05:40,044 --> 00:05:42,587
and the next thing I knew,
he was arrested by the police...
54
00:05:42,713 --> 00:05:44,672
for floating nude down the Seine.
55
00:05:44,798 --> 00:05:47,383
Experimenting in river currents...
56
00:05:47,509 --> 00:05:49,677
with rubber water wings.
57
00:05:49,803 --> 00:05:52,096
Mauve ones.
58
00:05:52,222 --> 00:05:55,350
Well, that cost quite a bit of
influence et d'argent...
59
00:05:55,476 --> 00:05:57,435
to hush up, I can tell you.
60
00:05:57,561 --> 00:05:59,437
Harold, dear,
don't play with your food.
61
00:06:01,774 --> 00:06:04,192
What's the matter?
Don't you feel well?
62
00:06:07,029 --> 00:06:08,947
[Hoarsely]
I have a sore throat.
63
00:06:09,073 --> 00:06:12,533
Oh. Well, now,
directly after dinner...
64
00:06:12,660 --> 00:06:14,619
I want you to go straight to bed.
65
00:06:14,745 --> 00:06:17,956
Harold's always been
a very delicate child.
66
00:06:18,123 --> 00:06:20,792
Even as a baby.
He seemed totally prone...
67
00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:23,127
to every possible kind of illness.
68
00:06:23,295 --> 00:06:26,297
Harold, dear, eat up your beets.
69
00:06:26,465 --> 00:06:29,258
I remember once in Tokyo...
70
00:06:29,385 --> 00:06:31,386
I had to call the embassy
for a doctor.
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00:06:31,512 --> 00:06:33,888
♪♪ [Humming "Greensleeves"]
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00:06:53,117 --> 00:06:56,160
Oh, my God!
73
00:06:57,663 --> 00:07:00,832
This is too much!
74
00:07:00,958 --> 00:07:05,920
[Sobs]
I can't stand much more of this!
75
00:07:06,046 --> 00:07:08,881
I can't take any more!
76
00:07:09,008 --> 00:07:12,218
[Sobbing]
Oh, my God!
77
00:07:15,139 --> 00:07:17,056
Oh, God!
78
00:07:19,685 --> 00:07:22,061
That's very interesting, Harold...
79
00:07:22,187 --> 00:07:24,689
and I think very illuminating.
80
00:07:24,815 --> 00:07:28,026
There seems to be
a definite pattern emerging.
81
00:07:28,193 --> 00:07:31,696
And of course,
this pattern, once isolated...
82
00:07:31,822 --> 00:07:33,740
can be coped with.
83
00:07:33,866 --> 00:07:36,409
Recognize the problem
and you're halfway on the road...
84
00:07:36,535 --> 00:07:38,453
to its, uh... its solution.
85
00:07:38,579 --> 00:07:40,455
[Chuckles]
86
00:07:40,581 --> 00:07:44,584
Tell me, Harold,
what do you do for fun?
87
00:07:44,710 --> 00:07:46,711
What activity gives you...
88
00:07:46,837 --> 00:07:50,089
a different sense of enjoyment
from the others?
89
00:07:50,215 --> 00:07:52,550
What do you find fulfilling?
90
00:07:52,718 --> 00:07:54,552
What gives you that...
91
00:07:54,720 --> 00:07:57,513
special satisfaction?
92
00:08:05,731 --> 00:08:07,899
I go to funerals.
93
00:08:08,067 --> 00:08:11,444
♪ Till I found myself alone ♪
94
00:08:11,570 --> 00:08:14,238
♪ Hopin' someone would miss me ♪
95
00:08:19,620 --> 00:08:22,246
♪ Thinkin' about my home ♪
96
00:08:22,372 --> 00:08:25,124
♪ And the last woman to kiss me ♪
97
00:08:26,168 --> 00:08:28,086
♪ Kiss me ♪
98
00:08:29,963 --> 00:08:33,299
♪ Well, sometimes you have to moan ♪
99
00:08:33,425 --> 00:08:36,094
♪ When nothing seems to suit ya ♪
100
00:08:36,261 --> 00:08:38,096
♪ But nevertheless you know ♪
101
00:08:38,263 --> 00:08:41,099
♪ You're locked towards the future ♪
102
00:08:42,142 --> 00:08:44,435
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪
103
00:08:44,561 --> 00:08:47,647
♪ So on and on you go ♪
104
00:08:47,773 --> 00:08:50,108
♪ The seconds tick the time out ♪
105
00:08:50,234 --> 00:08:52,318
♪ There's so much left to know ♪
106
00:08:52,444 --> 00:08:56,405
♪ And I'm on the road to find out ♪
107
00:08:56,532 --> 00:08:58,991
♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪♪
108
00:09:09,837 --> 00:09:13,714
Thou dost prepare for me a table
in the sight of my adversaries.
109
00:09:13,841 --> 00:09:17,802
Thou dost anoint my head with oil.
My chalice overflows.
110
00:09:17,928 --> 00:09:20,221
- [Woman Sobbing]
- Kindness and grace shall follow me...
111
00:09:20,347 --> 00:09:22,431
all the days of my life...
112
00:09:22,558 --> 00:09:24,559
and I shall dwell
in the house of the Lord...
113
00:09:24,685 --> 00:09:26,561
for length of days.
114
00:09:26,687 --> 00:09:29,981
The Earth is the Lord's
and the fullness thereof...
115
00:09:30,149 --> 00:09:32,275
the world and they
who dwell within...
116
00:09:32,401 --> 00:09:34,986
for he has established it
upon the waters...
117
00:09:35,112 --> 00:09:36,988
and set it firmly upon the rivers.
118
00:09:37,114 --> 00:09:38,948
Who shall ascend
the mountain of the Lord...
119
00:09:39,074 --> 00:09:41,784
or who shall stand in his holy place?
120
00:09:41,910 --> 00:09:43,494
The innocent of hands...
121
00:09:43,620 --> 00:09:45,163
- and the pure of heart...
- [Sneezes]
122
00:09:45,289 --> 00:09:47,665
Who has not turned
his mind to vanity...
123
00:09:47,791 --> 00:09:51,127
nor sworn deceitfully
to his neighbor.
124
00:09:51,253 --> 00:09:54,172
He shall receive
the blessing from the Lord...
125
00:09:54,298 --> 00:09:57,508
and a reward from God his savior.
126
00:09:57,634 --> 00:10:00,887
This is the generation
of those who seek him.
127
00:10:03,599 --> 00:10:07,518
♪ I wish I knew, I wish I knew ♪
128
00:10:10,022 --> 00:10:13,524
♪ What makes me, me
and what makes you, you ♪
129
00:10:16,278 --> 00:10:19,780
♪ It's just another point of view ♪
130
00:10:21,867 --> 00:10:25,661
♪ A state of mind I'm goin' through ♪
131
00:10:28,165 --> 00:10:31,918
♪ So what I see is never true ♪
132
00:10:33,712 --> 00:10:36,547
[Tires Screeching]
133
00:10:36,715 --> 00:10:38,633
Harold?
134
00:10:40,052 --> 00:10:44,639
Why you purchased
that monstrosity I have no idea.
135
00:10:44,765 --> 00:10:46,891
You can have any car you want.
136
00:10:47,017 --> 00:10:51,062
But that ugly black horror
is an eyesore and an embarrassment.
137
00:10:51,188 --> 00:10:54,315
Really, Harold,
it is time you settled down...
138
00:10:54,441 --> 00:10:57,902
and stopped flitting away your talents
on these little amateur theatrics...
139
00:10:58,028 --> 00:11:00,905
these little divertissements...
140
00:11:01,031 --> 00:11:03,699
no matter how psychologically
purging they may be.
141
00:11:05,202 --> 00:11:07,119
I don't know what to do.
142
00:11:11,375 --> 00:11:13,584
Go and have a talk
with your Uncle Victor.
143
00:11:13,752 --> 00:11:16,254
Perhaps he can fathom you.
144
00:11:16,421 --> 00:11:20,508
After all, he was
General MacArthur's right-hand man.
145
00:11:27,224 --> 00:11:29,141
[Man]
Well, what do you say, Harold?
146
00:11:30,435 --> 00:11:33,437
- Ah, it's a great life.
- [Footsteps Marching In Sync]
147
00:11:33,563 --> 00:11:36,065
There's action, adventure, advising...
148
00:11:36,191 --> 00:11:39,443
and you'll get a chance
to see the war firsthand.
149
00:11:40,654 --> 00:11:43,948
- And there are plenty of slant-eyed girls.
- [Man] Hup!
150
00:11:44,116 --> 00:11:46,325
Ah, it'll make a man
out of you, Harold.
151
00:11:46,451 --> 00:11:49,370
You'll travel the world, put on a uniform,
and take on a man's job.
152
00:11:49,496 --> 00:11:51,664
[Man]
Hup!
153
00:11:51,790 --> 00:11:55,126
You'll walk tall, with a glint in your eye
and a spring in your step...
154
00:11:55,294 --> 00:11:57,795
and the knowledge in your heart...
155
00:11:57,921 --> 00:12:00,798
that you are working for peace...
156
00:12:00,924 --> 00:12:03,342
and are serving your country...
157
00:12:03,468 --> 00:12:06,637
- just like Nathan Hale!
- [Man] Ready!
158
00:12:06,805 --> 00:12:08,639
Now, that's what this country needs...
159
00:12:08,807 --> 00:12:11,934
- [Rifles Cocking]
- More Nathan Hales.
160
00:12:12,060 --> 00:12:13,978
- [Man] Fire!
- [Gunfire]
161
00:12:18,567 --> 00:12:21,736
- [Man] Hup!
- Harold...
162
00:12:21,862 --> 00:12:23,738
I think I can see...
163
00:12:23,864 --> 00:12:27,992
a little Nathan Hale in you.
164
00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:30,661
♪♪ [Tchaikovsky's
Piano Concerto No. 1]
165
00:13:54,788 --> 00:13:56,664
Tell me, Harold...
166
00:13:56,790 --> 00:14:01,001
how many of these,
uh, suicides have you performed?
167
00:14:01,128 --> 00:14:04,547
An accurate number
would be difficult to gauge.
168
00:14:04,673 --> 00:14:06,924
Well, just give me a rough estimate.
169
00:14:07,050 --> 00:14:08,551
- A rough estimate?
- Mm.
170
00:14:09,803 --> 00:14:12,346
I'd say...
171
00:14:12,472 --> 00:14:13,764
fifteen.
172
00:14:13,890 --> 00:14:16,767
- Fifteen?
- That's a rough estimate.
173
00:14:16,893 --> 00:14:19,603
Were they all done
for your mother's benefit?
174
00:14:19,729 --> 00:14:21,939
No. No.
175
00:14:22,107 --> 00:14:24,191
I would not say "benefit."
176
00:14:24,317 --> 00:14:27,111
Harold, I only have
a few minutes, dear...
177
00:14:27,237 --> 00:14:29,989
and I do want
to inform you of my decision.
178
00:14:32,367 --> 00:14:35,286
You have led
a very carefree, idle...
179
00:14:35,454 --> 00:14:38,747
happy life up to the present...
the life of a child.
180
00:14:38,874 --> 00:14:41,750
But it is time now
to put away childish things...
181
00:14:41,877 --> 00:14:44,462
and take on adult responsibilities.
182
00:14:44,629 --> 00:14:46,797
Oh, we would all like
to sail through life...
183
00:14:46,923 --> 00:14:49,300
with no thought of tomorrow,
but that cannot be.
184
00:14:49,426 --> 00:14:51,427
We have our duties...
185
00:14:51,553 --> 00:14:54,263
our obligations, our principles.
186
00:14:54,389 --> 00:14:56,348
In short, Harold...
187
00:14:56,475 --> 00:14:59,143
I think it is time
for you to get married.
188
00:15:03,940 --> 00:15:05,900
♪♪ [Organ]
189
00:15:12,657 --> 00:15:15,451
[Man]
Let us pray to the Lord, king of glory...
190
00:15:15,577 --> 00:15:19,580
that he may bless and deliver
the souls of all faithful departed...
191
00:15:19,706 --> 00:15:23,000
from the pain of hell
and the bottomless pit.
192
00:15:23,168 --> 00:15:27,171
Deliver them from the lion's mouth
and the darkness therein...
193
00:15:27,339 --> 00:15:30,132
and rather bring them to...
194
00:15:30,258 --> 00:15:34,345
the blessing of light,
holy life, and eternal rest.
195
00:15:37,349 --> 00:15:39,016
"O Lord...
196
00:15:39,142 --> 00:15:42,394
do not bring your servant to trial...
197
00:15:42,521 --> 00:15:45,397
- for no man...
- [Woman] Psst!
198
00:15:45,524 --> 00:15:48,192
Becomes holy in your sight
unless you grant him...
199
00:15:48,318 --> 00:15:50,569
forgiveness of all his sins.
200
00:15:50,695 --> 00:15:53,364
We implore you therefore,
do not let the verdict...
201
00:15:53,490 --> 00:15:55,866
- of your judgment go against him...
- Psst!
202
00:15:55,992 --> 00:15:57,952
Whom the loyal prayer of Christian faith
commends to your mercy.
203
00:15:58,078 --> 00:16:00,955
- Psst!
- Rather...
204
00:16:01,081 --> 00:16:02,998
by the help of your grace,
may he escape...
205
00:16:03,124 --> 00:16:06,001
the sentence which he deserves,
for during...
206
00:16:06,127 --> 00:16:09,713
his earthly life, he was signed
with the seal of the Holy Trinity.
207
00:16:09,881 --> 00:16:12,633
You who live...
208
00:16:12,759 --> 00:16:15,553
and reign forever and ever.
209
00:16:15,679 --> 00:16:17,513
Amen."
210
00:16:17,639 --> 00:16:19,014
Psst!
211
00:16:20,809 --> 00:16:22,518
Like some licorice?
212
00:16:22,644 --> 00:16:24,562
- No, thank you.
- You're welcome.
213
00:16:30,902 --> 00:16:33,571
- ♪♪ [Organ]
- Did you know him?
214
00:16:33,738 --> 00:16:35,864
- No.
- Me neither.
215
00:16:35,991 --> 00:16:39,243
I heard he's 80 years old.
I'll be 80 next week.
216
00:16:39,411 --> 00:16:42,329
[Whispering] Good time
to move on, don't you think?
217
00:16:42,455 --> 00:16:44,415
I don't know.
218
00:16:45,875 --> 00:16:48,669
Well, I mean, 75 is too early...
219
00:16:48,795 --> 00:16:52,256
but at 85 you're just marking time.
220
00:16:52,424 --> 00:16:56,010
- [Whistle Blowing]
- You may as well look over the horizon.
221
00:16:56,136 --> 00:16:58,470
♪♪ [Marching Band]
222
00:17:02,517 --> 00:17:04,393
Tsk.
223
00:17:04,519 --> 00:17:07,104
I'll never understand
this mania for black.
224
00:17:07,272 --> 00:17:09,440
Nobody sends
black flowers, do they?
225
00:17:09,608 --> 00:17:11,567
Black flowers are dead flowers.
226
00:17:11,693 --> 00:17:14,194
Who sends dead flowers
to a funeral?
227
00:17:14,321 --> 00:17:16,947
It's absurd.
228
00:17:17,073 --> 00:17:19,575
- [Whistle Blows]
- ♪♪ [Continues]
229
00:17:35,091 --> 00:17:38,302
- What is your name?
- Harold. Harold Chasen.
230
00:17:38,428 --> 00:17:42,514
Oh, how do you do? I'm Dame Marjorie Chardin,
but you may call me Maude.
231
00:17:42,641 --> 00:17:45,017
- How do you do? Nice to meet you.
- Well, thank you.
232
00:17:45,143 --> 00:17:48,437
I think we're going to be
great friends, don't you?
233
00:17:48,563 --> 00:17:50,314
Can I give you a lift, Harold?
234
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:52,983
No, thank you.
I have my own car.
235
00:17:53,109 --> 00:17:56,820
Well, I must be off.
We shall have to meet again.
236
00:17:58,031 --> 00:18:00,157
Ah...
237
00:18:02,661 --> 00:18:04,578
Tell me, do you dance?
238
00:18:04,704 --> 00:18:08,040
- Pardon me?
- Do you sing and dance?
239
00:18:08,166 --> 00:18:10,626
- Uh, no.
- "Uh, no."
240
00:18:10,752 --> 00:18:13,087
I thought not.
[Laughing]
241
00:18:15,048 --> 00:18:17,007
[Tires Screeching]
242
00:18:21,846 --> 00:18:24,640
[Horn Honking]
243
00:18:26,017 --> 00:18:28,686
That woman... she took my car!
244
00:18:31,356 --> 00:18:33,774
I have here, Harold,
the form sent out...
245
00:18:33,900 --> 00:18:35,859
by the National Computer
Dating Service.
246
00:18:35,985 --> 00:18:38,612
They screen out
the fat and the ugly...
247
00:18:38,738 --> 00:18:41,281
so it is obviously
a firm of high standards.
248
00:18:41,408 --> 00:18:44,326
First, here is
the personality interview...
249
00:18:44,452 --> 00:18:46,537
which you are to fill out
and return.
250
00:18:46,663 --> 00:18:49,373
Now, then, are you ready, Harold?
251
00:18:49,541 --> 00:18:52,000
Here is the first question.
252
00:18:52,127 --> 00:18:55,254
"Are you uncomfortable
meeting new people?"
253
00:18:55,380 --> 00:18:58,465
Well, I think that's a yes.
Don't you agree, Harold?
254
00:18:58,591 --> 00:19:02,302
"Should sex education
be taught outside the home?"
255
00:19:02,429 --> 00:19:04,346
Oh, I would say no.
Wouldn't you, Harold?
256
00:19:04,472 --> 00:19:06,890
Yeah, we'll give a D there.
Three:
257
00:19:07,058 --> 00:19:10,894
"Should women run for president
of the United States?"
258
00:19:11,020 --> 00:19:13,731
I don't see why not.
Absolutely yes.
259
00:19:13,857 --> 00:19:16,859
"Do you remember jokes
and take pleasure...
260
00:19:16,985 --> 00:19:19,111
in relating them to others?"
261
00:19:19,237 --> 00:19:21,196
You don't do that,
do you, Harold?
262
00:19:21,322 --> 00:19:23,407
No. Absolutely no.
263
00:19:23,575 --> 00:19:26,744
"Do you often get the feeling
that perhaps life isn't worth living?"
264
00:19:26,870 --> 00:19:31,206
Mm? What do you think, Harold?
A? B?
265
00:19:31,332 --> 00:19:34,084
Oh, we'll put down C...
"not sure." Mm-hmm.
266
00:19:34,252 --> 00:19:37,087
"Is the subject of sex
being overexploited...
267
00:19:37,213 --> 00:19:39,131
by our mass media?"
268
00:19:39,257 --> 00:19:41,759
Well, that would have to be yes,
wouldn't it?
269
00:19:41,926 --> 00:19:45,429
"Is it difficult for you
to accept criticism?"
270
00:19:45,555 --> 00:19:48,265
No. We'll mark D.
271
00:19:48,391 --> 00:19:52,102
"Do you sometimes have headaches
or backaches after a difficult day?"
272
00:19:52,228 --> 00:19:54,688
Yes, I do indeed.
273
00:19:54,814 --> 00:19:56,899
"Do you go to sleep easily?"
274
00:19:57,025 --> 00:19:58,942
I'd say so.
275
00:19:59,068 --> 00:20:01,653
"Do you believe
in capital punishment for murder?"
276
00:20:01,780 --> 00:20:03,655
Oh, yes, I do indeed.
277
00:20:03,782 --> 00:20:07,659
"In your opinion, are social affairs
usually a waste of time?"
278
00:20:07,786 --> 00:20:09,787
Heavens no!
279
00:20:10,955 --> 00:20:13,665
"Can God influence our lives?"
280
00:20:13,792 --> 00:20:17,044
Oh, yes.
Absolutely yes.
281
00:20:17,170 --> 00:20:21,507
"Does your personal religion
or philosophy include a life after death?"
282
00:20:21,633 --> 00:20:23,217
Oh, yes indeed.
283
00:20:23,343 --> 00:20:26,512
That's absolutely.
284
00:20:27,639 --> 00:20:30,474
"Did you enjoy life
when you were a child?"
285
00:20:30,642 --> 00:20:34,520
Oh, yes.
You were a wonderful baby, Harold.
286
00:20:34,646 --> 00:20:38,315
"Do you think the sexual revolution
has gone too far?"
287
00:20:38,441 --> 00:20:41,485
It certainly has.
288
00:20:41,611 --> 00:20:45,906
"Do you find the idea
of wife-swapping distasteful?"
289
00:20:46,032 --> 00:20:49,159
I even find the question distasteful.
290
00:20:49,285 --> 00:20:51,787
"Do you..."
291
00:20:53,790 --> 00:20:55,499
Harold, please!
292
00:20:57,126 --> 00:21:00,838
"Do you have ups and downs
without obvious reason?"
293
00:21:00,964 --> 00:21:03,882
[Chuckling]
That's you, Harold.
294
00:21:05,009 --> 00:21:08,136
♪ Lord, my body ♪
295
00:21:08,263 --> 00:21:11,515
♪ Has been a good friend ♪
296
00:21:11,683 --> 00:21:14,768
♪ But I won't need it ♪
297
00:21:14,894 --> 00:21:18,647
♪ When I reach the end ♪
298
00:21:18,773 --> 00:21:21,608
♪ Miles from nowhere ♪
299
00:21:21,734 --> 00:21:25,070
♪ I guess I'll take my time ♪
300
00:21:25,196 --> 00:21:28,323
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
301
00:21:28,449 --> 00:21:32,202
♪ To reach there ♪♪
302
00:21:35,582 --> 00:21:36,874
Psst!
303
00:21:48,303 --> 00:21:50,178
Dearest brothers...
304
00:21:50,305 --> 00:21:53,599
let us faithfully and lovingly
remember our brother...
305
00:21:53,725 --> 00:21:55,893
whom God has taken to himself...
306
00:21:56,019 --> 00:21:57,895
from the trials of this world.
307
00:21:58,021 --> 00:22:00,355
God have mercy.
308
00:22:00,481 --> 00:22:03,567
Christ have mercy.
Lord have mercy.
309
00:22:03,735 --> 00:22:06,570
[All]
Our Father who art in heaven...
310
00:22:06,738 --> 00:22:08,572
hallowed be thy name.
311
00:22:08,740 --> 00:22:10,699
Thy kingdom come,
thy will be done...
312
00:22:10,825 --> 00:22:12,701
on Earth as it is in heaven.
313
00:22:12,827 --> 00:22:15,329
Give us this day our daily bread...
314
00:22:15,455 --> 00:22:17,331
and forgive us our trespasses...
315
00:22:17,457 --> 00:22:19,750
as we forgive those
who have trespassed against us...
316
00:22:19,876 --> 00:22:22,210
and lead us not into temptation...
317
00:22:22,337 --> 00:22:25,756
but deliver us from evil. Amen.
318
00:22:37,769 --> 00:22:40,771
♪ Bring tea for the tillerman ♪
319
00:22:40,939 --> 00:22:43,273
♪ Steak for the sun ♪
320
00:22:43,399 --> 00:22:47,611
♪ Wine for the woman
who made the rain come ♪
321
00:22:47,737 --> 00:22:51,156
♪ Seagulls, sing your hearts away ♪
322
00:22:51,282 --> 00:22:53,951
♪ 'Cause while the sinners sin ♪
323
00:22:54,118 --> 00:22:56,620
♪ The children play ♪
324
00:22:56,788 --> 00:22:59,915
♪ Oh, Lord
how they play and play ♪
325
00:23:00,041 --> 00:23:03,543
♪ For that happy day
For that happy day ♪
326
00:23:03,670 --> 00:23:06,088
♪ Happy day ♪♪
327
00:23:24,941 --> 00:23:27,275
My boy, excuse me.
328
00:23:27,402 --> 00:23:29,987
One moment, please.
329
00:23:30,154 --> 00:23:32,155
Who was that old lady
who was waving to you earlier?
330
00:23:32,323 --> 00:23:35,826
Hello, Harold.
Can I give you a lift?
331
00:23:35,952 --> 00:23:37,828
Oh, there you are, madam.
332
00:23:37,954 --> 00:23:40,163
Were you not the lady
who drove my car off yesterday?
333
00:23:40,331 --> 00:23:42,708
Was that the one with the Saint Christopher
medal on the dashboard?
334
00:23:42,834 --> 00:23:44,710
- Yes.
- Then I suppose it was me.
335
00:23:44,836 --> 00:23:46,461
Get in, Harold.
336
00:23:46,587 --> 00:23:50,007
Were you also the one
who painted the saint?
337
00:23:50,133 --> 00:23:52,509
Oh, yes.
How did you like that?
338
00:23:52,677 --> 00:23:55,178
- Well, I didn't.
- Oh, don't be too discouraged.
339
00:23:55,346 --> 00:23:58,682
For aesthetic appreciation,
always a little time.
340
00:23:58,850 --> 00:24:00,767
[Tires Screeching]
341
00:24:07,442 --> 00:24:10,527
What a delight it is, Harold,
to bump into you again.
342
00:24:10,653 --> 00:24:13,280
I knew we were gonna be
good friends the moment I saw you.
343
00:24:13,406 --> 00:24:15,490
You go to funerals often,
don't you?
344
00:24:15,616 --> 00:24:17,659
- Uh, yeah.
- Yeah, so do I.
345
00:24:17,785 --> 00:24:22,039
They're such fun, aren't they?
It's all change, all revolving.
346
00:24:22,206 --> 00:24:24,374
Burials and births,
one linked to the other.
347
00:24:24,500 --> 00:24:26,710
The great circle of life.
348
00:24:29,797 --> 00:24:31,840
Hey, this old thing handles well.
349
00:24:31,966 --> 00:24:34,509
- Ever drive a hearse, Harold?
- Yeah.
350
00:24:34,635 --> 00:24:37,387
Well, it's a new experience for me.
351
00:24:40,308 --> 00:24:42,184
Good on curves.
352
00:24:42,310 --> 00:24:44,186
Shall I take you home, Harold?
353
00:24:44,312 --> 00:24:46,605
Uh, this is my car.
354
00:24:46,731 --> 00:24:49,149
- Your hearse?
- "Yearse."
355
00:24:49,275 --> 00:24:51,651
[Maude]
Oh!
356
00:24:55,531 --> 00:24:58,241
Then you shall take me home.
357
00:25:12,256 --> 00:25:15,300
So just before he left
for the monastery in Tibet...
358
00:25:15,426 --> 00:25:17,511
Big Sweeney gave me his keys.
359
00:25:17,637 --> 00:25:19,805
'Course, I had to make
some additions for the new models...
360
00:25:19,931 --> 00:25:21,932
but not as many as you might think.
361
00:25:22,100 --> 00:25:26,186
Once you have your basic set,
it's then only a question of variation.
362
00:25:27,271 --> 00:25:29,940
You hop in any car you want
and just drive off?
363
00:25:30,066 --> 00:25:32,359
Oh, not any car.
I like to keep a variety.
364
00:25:32,485 --> 00:25:34,444
I'm always looking
for the new experience.
365
00:25:36,280 --> 00:25:38,865
Maybe.
366
00:25:38,991 --> 00:25:41,618
Nevertheless,
I think you're upsetting people.
367
00:25:41,744 --> 00:25:43,662
I don't know if that's right.
368
00:25:45,206 --> 00:25:48,917
Well, if some people get upset because
they feel they have a hold on some things...
369
00:25:49,043 --> 00:25:51,128
I'm merely acting
as a gentle reminder...
370
00:25:51,254 --> 00:25:54,464
here today, gone tomorrow,
so don't get attached to things.
371
00:25:54,632 --> 00:25:56,925
Now, with that in mind...
372
00:25:57,051 --> 00:25:59,636
I'm not against collecting stuff.
373
00:25:59,762 --> 00:26:03,598
I've collected
quite a lot of stuff in my time.
374
00:26:05,935 --> 00:26:08,145
This is all memorabilia...
375
00:26:08,312 --> 00:26:11,982
but it's incidental, not integral,
if you know what I mean.
376
00:26:12,108 --> 00:26:14,734
- Oh! The birds.
- Wow.
377
00:26:14,861 --> 00:26:17,404
Oh, I love them so much.
378
00:26:17,530 --> 00:26:20,740
They're the only wildlife
I get to see anymore.
379
00:26:20,867 --> 00:26:24,286
Ah, me. Free as a bird.
380
00:26:26,539 --> 00:26:30,500
You know, at one time I used to break
into pet shops to liberate the canaries.
381
00:26:30,626 --> 00:26:33,962
But I decided that was an idea
way before its time.
382
00:26:34,088 --> 00:26:38,008
Zoos are full.
Prisons are overflowing.
383
00:26:38,176 --> 00:26:40,427
[Sighs]
Oh, my.
384
00:26:40,553 --> 00:26:42,596
How the world still...
385
00:26:42,722 --> 00:26:45,015
dearly loves a cage.
386
00:26:45,183 --> 00:26:47,184
Uh, please sit down, Harold.
387
00:26:47,351 --> 00:26:51,021
I'll put the kettle on.
We'll have a nice hot cup of tea.
388
00:26:51,189 --> 00:26:53,190
Oh, thank you,
but I really have to go.
389
00:26:53,357 --> 00:26:56,943
Oh, but it's oat straw tea.
You've never had oat straw tea, have you?
390
00:26:57,069 --> 00:26:59,404
- No.
- Well, then.
391
00:26:59,530 --> 00:27:02,199
No, but I really do have to go.
I have an appointment.
392
00:27:02,366 --> 00:27:06,578
- I really can't miss it.
- Oh. At the dentist?
393
00:27:08,206 --> 00:27:10,040
Kind of.
394
00:27:11,334 --> 00:27:14,044
Well, then, you'll just have
to come back and visit.
395
00:27:14,212 --> 00:27:17,339
- All right.
- My door's always open.
396
00:27:17,465 --> 00:27:19,633
- All right.
- Promise?
397
00:27:19,759 --> 00:27:21,426
I promise.
398
00:27:24,764 --> 00:27:26,723
[Psychologist]
Harold?
399
00:27:27,892 --> 00:27:29,559
Harold?
400
00:27:30,895 --> 00:27:33,772
I asked,
"Do you have any friends?"
401
00:27:33,898 --> 00:27:36,816
- No.
- None at all?
402
00:27:36,943 --> 00:27:38,818
No.
403
00:27:38,945 --> 00:27:41,029
Maybe one.
404
00:27:41,155 --> 00:27:43,365
Would you care
to talk about this friend?
405
00:27:43,491 --> 00:27:45,283
[Emphatically]
No.
406
00:27:45,409 --> 00:27:47,577
I find you a very
interesting case, Harold...
407
00:27:47,703 --> 00:27:51,706
but this reluctance on your part is detrimental
to the psychoanalytical process.
408
00:27:51,832 --> 00:27:53,917
Do you understand?
409
00:27:57,546 --> 00:27:59,673
Very well.
410
00:27:59,799 --> 00:28:02,259
Your mother tells me, Harold,
that she's arranging...
411
00:28:02,426 --> 00:28:05,512
several dates for you
with some young ladies.
412
00:28:05,638 --> 00:28:08,181
How do you feel about that?
413
00:28:08,307 --> 00:28:10,433
[Snoring]
414
00:28:14,188 --> 00:28:15,939
Hello, I'm Candy Gulf.
415
00:28:16,065 --> 00:28:18,858
How do you do? I'm Mrs. Chasen.
Do come in.
416
00:28:18,985 --> 00:28:21,778
Harold is out in the garden, Candy,
but he'll be here in a moment.
417
00:28:21,904 --> 00:28:24,572
Shall we, uh, sit down?
418
00:28:24,699 --> 00:28:27,867
Oh, there's Harold. Hello.
419
00:28:27,994 --> 00:28:31,121
[Mrs. Chasen Chuckling]
420
00:28:34,500 --> 00:28:38,044
- Oh, he seems very nice.
- Oh, thank you.
421
00:28:38,170 --> 00:28:40,130
You are at the university?
422
00:28:40,256 --> 00:28:42,966
- Yes, I am.
- And what are you studying?
423
00:28:43,092 --> 00:28:45,302
Poli sci with a minor in home ec.
424
00:28:45,428 --> 00:28:48,388
- "Poli sci"?
- Political science.
425
00:28:48,514 --> 00:28:51,308
- Oh.
- It's all about what's going on.
426
00:28:51,475 --> 00:28:54,644
Is Harold interested
in what's going on?
427
00:28:54,812 --> 00:28:57,147
I just think it's such
a super thing to study.
428
00:28:57,273 --> 00:29:00,275
And then, of course, I can always
fall back on my home ec.
429
00:29:00,401 --> 00:29:02,444
- Oh, now, that's good planning.
- Yes.
430
00:29:02,570 --> 00:29:05,822
Tell me, Candy, are you a regular
with this computer club?
431
00:29:05,948 --> 00:29:09,326
Oh, heavens no!
I don't have to worry about dates.
432
00:29:09,452 --> 00:29:11,619
- Oh.
- [Both Laughing]
433
00:29:11,746 --> 00:29:15,206
But, you see, some of the other girls
in my sorority decided...
434
00:29:15,333 --> 00:29:18,168
that somebody ought to try it,
so we drew straws and I lost.
435
00:29:19,545 --> 00:29:22,839
Oh, but I... I'm looking forward
to meeting Harold.
436
00:29:23,007 --> 00:29:25,633
Well, I think
I should mention, Candy...
437
00:29:25,760 --> 00:29:28,219
Harold does have
his little eccentric moments.
438
00:29:28,346 --> 00:29:29,679
That's all right.
439
00:29:29,805 --> 00:29:33,099
I have a brother
who's a real cutup too.
440
00:29:33,225 --> 00:29:35,935
Oh, I will never forget the time...
441
00:29:36,062 --> 00:29:39,189
we had this old television set
with no parts in it.
442
00:29:39,315 --> 00:29:41,900
Tommy stuck his head behind it...
443
00:29:42,026 --> 00:29:45,945
and started giving a whole newscast
before the entire family.
444
00:29:46,072 --> 00:29:49,866
Must've been very funny.
445
00:29:49,992 --> 00:29:52,869
[Panicked Gasp]
Harold!
446
00:29:53,037 --> 00:29:55,455
Oh, yes, dear.
Here is Harold now.
447
00:29:55,581 --> 00:29:57,582
- [Candy Exclaiming]
- Harold, this is Candy.
448
00:29:57,708 --> 00:30:00,710
Candy's just been telling us
such a funny little story...
449
00:30:00,836 --> 00:30:03,755
about... Walter Cronkite.
450
00:30:07,593 --> 00:30:10,345
[Exclaiming Continues]
451
00:30:16,727 --> 00:30:18,853
♪ I used to walk alone ♪
452
00:30:18,979 --> 00:30:21,439
♪ Every step seemed the same ♪
453
00:30:24,902 --> 00:30:26,903
♪ This world was not my own ♪
454
00:30:27,029 --> 00:30:30,240
♪ So there was
nothing much to gain ♪
455
00:30:33,244 --> 00:30:35,245
♪ Look up and see the clouds ♪
456
00:30:35,413 --> 00:30:39,249
♪ Look down and see the cold floor ♪
457
00:30:41,419 --> 00:30:43,711
♪ Until you came into my life, girl ♪
458
00:30:43,838 --> 00:30:46,881
♪ I saw nothing, nothing more ♪♪
459
00:30:52,304 --> 00:30:56,307
Oh. Excuse me.
460
00:30:57,893 --> 00:31:01,104
- I beg your pardon.
- What do you want?
461
00:31:01,230 --> 00:31:03,773
I'm sorry.
I was looking for Maude.
462
00:31:03,899 --> 00:31:05,650
[Maude]
Harold?
463
00:31:11,574 --> 00:31:13,241
Maude.
464
00:31:14,785 --> 00:31:17,662
How about some ginger pie?
465
00:31:17,788 --> 00:31:20,540
- Fine. Thank you.
- I'll heat some up.
466
00:31:24,420 --> 00:31:26,588
My, Harold,
I'm glad to see you again.
467
00:31:26,714 --> 00:31:28,882
Do you often model for Glaucus?
468
00:31:29,008 --> 00:31:31,801
Oh, heavens, no.
I don't have the time.
469
00:31:31,969 --> 00:31:33,803
But I like to keep in practice.
470
00:31:33,971 --> 00:31:38,057
And poor Glaucus occasionally
needs his memory refreshed...
471
00:31:38,184 --> 00:31:41,102
as to the contours
of the female form.
472
00:31:42,188 --> 00:31:45,482
- Do you disapprove?
- Me? No. Of course not.
473
00:31:47,860 --> 00:31:51,488
Really?
Do you think it's wrong?
474
00:32:02,500 --> 00:32:05,919
- No.
- Oh, heavens, I'm glad you said that.
475
00:32:06,045 --> 00:32:08,671
I want to show you my painting.
476
00:32:08,797 --> 00:32:12,008
This is The Rape of Rome.
477
00:32:12,176 --> 00:32:15,762
Over in the corner is
Leda and the Swan.
478
00:32:15,888 --> 00:32:18,181
A self-portrait.
479
00:32:18,307 --> 00:32:21,017
And over here is my favorite.
480
00:32:22,811 --> 00:32:25,188
It's titled...
481
00:32:25,314 --> 00:32:27,857
Rainbow with Egg Underneath...
482
00:32:28,025 --> 00:32:30,193
and an Elephant.
483
00:32:30,319 --> 00:32:33,321
- Do you like it?
- Oh, yeah. Very much.
484
00:32:33,447 --> 00:32:35,490
I then became infatuated...
485
00:32:35,616 --> 00:32:38,201
with these, my odorifics.
486
00:32:38,327 --> 00:32:40,203
"Give the nose a treat,"
I thought.
487
00:32:40,329 --> 00:32:42,997
"Have a kind of a...
of a olfactory banquet."
488
00:32:43,123 --> 00:32:46,125
So I began first on the easiest:
Roast beef, old books...
489
00:32:46,252 --> 00:32:49,212
mown grass,
and Mexican farmyard.
490
00:32:49,338 --> 00:32:51,464
Oh! Here's one you'll like.
491
00:32:51,590 --> 00:32:55,552
Snowfall on 42nd Street.
I'll put it on.
492
00:32:58,013 --> 00:33:00,848
Now, you hold on to this.
493
00:33:00,975 --> 00:33:02,892
I'll pump it up.
494
00:33:04,520 --> 00:33:07,730
Okay. Now, hold it up there.
495
00:33:07,856 --> 00:33:09,941
Now, what do you smell?
496
00:33:14,655 --> 00:33:17,907
Subways?
[Chuckles]
497
00:33:22,913 --> 00:33:25,123
Perfume.
498
00:33:26,959 --> 00:33:29,085
[Coughing]
499
00:33:30,796 --> 00:33:33,131
- Cigarettes.
- [Both Chuckling]
500
00:33:40,806 --> 00:33:43,766
- Snow.
- Snow. [Laughs]
501
00:33:43,892 --> 00:33:46,894
Oh, it goes on and on.
502
00:33:47,021 --> 00:33:48,938
That's just great.
503
00:33:49,064 --> 00:33:52,108
But then I decided to switch...
504
00:33:52,234 --> 00:33:54,319
to the taCtile.
505
00:33:56,905 --> 00:33:59,616
- What do you think?
- I like this.
506
00:33:59,783 --> 00:34:01,909
Oh, no, no, no.
Really get close...
507
00:34:02,036 --> 00:34:04,954
and reach in and feel.
508
00:34:05,080 --> 00:34:07,540
- [Kettle Whistling]
- Oh. There's my kettle.
509
00:34:07,666 --> 00:34:11,127
Uh... Well, stroke...
510
00:34:11,253 --> 00:34:12,962
palm...
511
00:34:13,130 --> 00:34:14,964
caress...
512
00:34:15,132 --> 00:34:17,050
explore.
513
00:34:25,142 --> 00:34:27,310
[Whistling Stops]
514
00:34:49,833 --> 00:34:52,126
[Moaning]
515
00:34:53,212 --> 00:34:55,171
[Cups Clatter]
516
00:34:58,634 --> 00:35:02,345
Here we are:
Oat straw tea and ginger pie.
517
00:35:04,056 --> 00:35:07,850
[Chuckles]
Excuse the mismatched saucers.
518
00:35:09,186 --> 00:35:11,354
This is definitely
a new experience for me.
519
00:35:11,480 --> 00:35:14,857
Oh, wonderful.
Try something new each day.
520
00:35:14,983 --> 00:35:16,943
After all, we're given life
to find it out.
521
00:35:17,069 --> 00:35:18,945
It doesn't last forever.
522
00:35:19,071 --> 00:35:20,988
You look as if you could.
523
00:35:21,115 --> 00:35:22,824
[Groans]
524
00:35:22,950 --> 00:35:27,036
- Did I tell you I'll be 80 on Saturday?
- You don't look 80.
525
00:35:27,204 --> 00:35:30,039
Oh, well, that's the influence
of the right food, right exercises...
526
00:35:30,165 --> 00:35:32,041
and the right breathing.
527
00:35:32,167 --> 00:35:34,252
Greet the dawn
with the Breath of Fire.
528
00:35:34,378 --> 00:35:37,880
[Inhales Deeply, Exhales Forcefully]
529
00:35:44,430 --> 00:35:47,598
[Gasps]
Oh!
530
00:35:47,725 --> 00:35:50,727
Well, there's no question
my body's giving out.
531
00:35:50,853 --> 00:35:54,731
I'm well into autumn.
It's all gonna be over after Saturday.
532
00:35:54,857 --> 00:35:56,607
Uh, tell me about yourself.
533
00:35:56,734 --> 00:35:59,736
What do you do
when you aren't visiting funerals?
534
00:36:08,287 --> 00:36:12,415
Yep. There is definitely
a certain attraCtion.
535
00:36:26,346 --> 00:36:28,514
I ask you though, Harold:
536
00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:30,600
Is it enough?
537
00:36:31,810 --> 00:36:34,979
- What do you mean?
- Well...
538
00:36:38,275 --> 00:36:40,443
Mm.
539
00:36:41,737 --> 00:36:44,655
I like to watch things grow.
540
00:36:52,247 --> 00:36:55,333
They grow and bloom...
541
00:36:55,459 --> 00:36:57,794
and fade and die...
542
00:36:57,920 --> 00:37:00,463
and change into something else.
543
00:37:02,216 --> 00:37:05,301
Ah, life.
[Chuckles]
544
00:37:05,469 --> 00:37:09,514
[Maude] I should like to change
into a sunflower most of all.
545
00:37:09,640 --> 00:37:13,059
They're so tall and simple.
546
00:37:13,185 --> 00:37:15,186
What flower would you like to be?
547
00:37:16,146 --> 00:37:18,022
[Harold]
I don't know.
548
00:37:19,441 --> 00:37:22,318
- One of these, maybe.
- Why do you say that?
549
00:37:24,363 --> 00:37:28,324
- Because they're all alike.
- Oh, but they're not.
550
00:37:28,450 --> 00:37:30,201
Look. See?
551
00:37:30,327 --> 00:37:33,287
Some are smaller,
some are fatter...
552
00:37:33,413 --> 00:37:36,290
some grow to the left,
some to the right.
553
00:37:36,416 --> 00:37:38,501
Some even have lost some petals.
554
00:37:38,669 --> 00:37:42,171
All kinds of observable differences.
555
00:37:42,339 --> 00:37:43,965
You see, Harold...
556
00:37:44,091 --> 00:37:47,468
I feel that much
of the world's sorrow...
557
00:37:47,594 --> 00:37:50,346
comes from people who are this...
558
00:37:51,849 --> 00:37:53,641
yet...
559
00:37:53,767 --> 00:37:56,477
allow themselves to be
treated as that.
560
00:37:58,355 --> 00:38:01,148
♪ Well, I think it's fine ♪
561
00:38:02,234 --> 00:38:05,278
♪ Building jumbo planes ♪
562
00:38:06,405 --> 00:38:08,948
♪ Or takin' a ride ♪
563
00:38:09,908 --> 00:38:12,535
♪ On a cosmic train ♪
564
00:38:13,954 --> 00:38:16,163
♪ Switch on summer ♪
565
00:38:17,249 --> 00:38:19,750
♪ From a slot machine ♪
566
00:38:21,461 --> 00:38:24,213
♪ Yes, get what you want to
if you want ♪
567
00:38:24,381 --> 00:38:26,883
♪ 'Cause you can get anything ♪
568
00:38:29,803 --> 00:38:33,222
♪ I know we've come a long way ♪
569
00:38:33,390 --> 00:38:36,934
♪ We're changin' day to day ♪
570
00:38:37,060 --> 00:38:43,024
♪ But tell me
where do the children play ♪
571
00:38:54,494 --> 00:38:57,038
♪ Well, you roll on roads ♪
572
00:38:58,081 --> 00:39:01,751
♪ Over fresh green grass ♪
573
00:39:01,877 --> 00:39:04,211
♪ For your lorry loads ♪
574
00:39:05,797 --> 00:39:08,341
- ♪ Pumpin' petrol gas ♪
- [Tires Screeching]
575
00:39:09,593 --> 00:39:12,011
♪ And you make them long ♪
576
00:39:13,388 --> 00:39:15,765
- ♪ And you make them tall ♪
- [Tires Screeching]
577
00:39:15,891 --> 00:39:19,894
- Power steering.
- ♪ But they just go on and on ♪
578
00:39:20,020 --> 00:39:23,147
♪ And it seems that
you can't get off ♪
579
00:39:24,691 --> 00:39:29,570
♪ Oh, I know we've come a long way ♪
580
00:39:29,696 --> 00:39:32,865
♪ We're changin' day to day ♪
581
00:39:32,991 --> 00:39:36,953
♪ But tell me
where do the children play ♪♪
582
00:39:37,079 --> 00:39:39,080
[Horns Honking]
583
00:39:41,416 --> 00:39:43,334
[Tires Screeching]
584
00:39:46,046 --> 00:39:47,964
[Man]
Hey! Jesus Christ!
585
00:39:49,091 --> 00:39:52,468
That little tree is in trouble.
Come on.
586
00:39:52,594 --> 00:39:55,346
Look at it. Oh!
587
00:39:55,472 --> 00:39:58,808
It's suffocating.
Well, it's the smog.
588
00:39:58,976 --> 00:40:02,311
You know, people can live with it,
but trees, it gives them asthma.
589
00:40:02,437 --> 00:40:04,313
- They can't breathe.
- Huh?
590
00:40:04,439 --> 00:40:06,732
The leaves...
look, they're turning brown.
591
00:40:06,858 --> 00:40:10,528
Harold, we have got
to do something about this life.
592
00:40:10,654 --> 00:40:13,864
- What?
- We'll transplant it to the forest.
593
00:40:13,991 --> 00:40:16,283
- You can't do that.
- Why not?
594
00:40:16,410 --> 00:40:19,495
- This is public property.
- Well, exactly.
595
00:40:20,914 --> 00:40:23,290
Well, we'll need tools.
596
00:40:23,417 --> 00:40:25,501
You're right.
We'll go see Glaucus.
597
00:40:25,627 --> 00:40:27,461
Come on.
598
00:40:27,587 --> 00:40:29,839
Wait a minute.
599
00:40:29,965 --> 00:40:32,049
Oh, the police. Come on.
600
00:40:34,636 --> 00:40:36,762
♪♪ [Maude Humming]
601
00:40:36,888 --> 00:40:39,765
Well, good afternoon, Officer.
Bit of trouble here?
602
00:40:39,891 --> 00:40:41,517
Yes, ma'am. Someone had
a little trouble parking.
603
00:40:41,685 --> 00:40:43,352
- It's a tricky turn.
- Yes, ma'am.
604
00:40:43,478 --> 00:40:45,521
Tell me, that car over there...
605
00:40:45,647 --> 00:40:47,690
is that parked all right?
606
00:40:47,816 --> 00:40:50,276
- Yes, ma'am. That's fine.
- Oh, thank you so much.
607
00:40:50,402 --> 00:40:54,030
Uh, you might turn the radio off.
Saves the battery.
608
00:40:55,615 --> 00:40:58,451
♪♪ [Maude Humming]
609
00:40:58,577 --> 00:41:01,162
[Chattering, Chuckling]
610
00:41:08,587 --> 00:41:10,838
[Engine Starts]
611
00:41:12,841 --> 00:41:14,675
[Tires Screeching]
612
00:41:24,519 --> 00:41:26,520
[Maude]
A little after-dinner liqueur, Harold?
613
00:41:26,646 --> 00:41:28,647
Oh, uh, thank you.
I don't drink.
614
00:41:28,774 --> 00:41:31,317
Oh, it's all right.
It's organic.
615
00:41:31,443 --> 00:41:34,361
- Thanks.
- It has no nutritional value...
616
00:41:34,488 --> 00:41:38,407
but consistency
is not really a human trait.
617
00:41:38,533 --> 00:41:40,659
What is that up there?
618
00:41:40,786 --> 00:41:43,913
Oh, that's my umbrella.
That's just a relic.
619
00:41:44,039 --> 00:41:46,749
I found it when I was packing
to come to America.
620
00:41:46,875 --> 00:41:49,460
It used to be
my defense on picket lines...
621
00:41:49,586 --> 00:41:51,754
and rallies and political meetings...
622
00:41:51,922 --> 00:41:53,756
being dragged off by the police...
623
00:41:53,924 --> 00:41:56,425
and attacked by thugs
of the opposition.
624
00:41:56,551 --> 00:41:58,219
What were you fighting for?
625
00:41:58,345 --> 00:42:00,930
Oh, big issues:
626
00:42:01,056 --> 00:42:03,224
Liberty, rights, justice.
627
00:42:03,350 --> 00:42:06,811
Kings died. Kingdoms fell.
628
00:42:06,937 --> 00:42:09,105
I don't regret the kingdoms.
629
00:42:09,272 --> 00:42:11,357
What sense in...
630
00:42:11,483 --> 00:42:14,652
borders and nations
and patriotism?
631
00:42:16,196 --> 00:42:18,906
But I miss the kings.
632
00:42:20,283 --> 00:42:22,284
When I was a little girl...
633
00:42:22,452 --> 00:42:26,122
I was taken to the palace
in Vienna, to a garden party.
634
00:42:26,248 --> 00:42:29,208
I can still see the sun shining...
635
00:42:29,334 --> 00:42:31,210
the parasols...
636
00:42:31,336 --> 00:42:34,421
the flashing uniforms
of the young officers.
637
00:42:34,548 --> 00:42:37,299
I thought then that
I would marry a soldier.
638
00:42:39,803 --> 00:42:42,638
Later on,
Frederick would chide me about it.
639
00:42:44,558 --> 00:42:47,476
He was so serious.
640
00:42:48,812 --> 00:42:51,689
A doctor at the university...
641
00:42:51,815 --> 00:42:53,774
and in the government.
642
00:43:06,413 --> 00:43:09,498
But that was all before.
643
00:43:19,217 --> 00:43:21,010
So...
644
00:43:24,556 --> 00:43:26,640
you don't use
the umbrella anymore.
645
00:43:31,021 --> 00:43:32,980
No more revolts?
646
00:43:36,943 --> 00:43:38,819
Oh. Oh, yes.
647
00:43:38,945 --> 00:43:41,697
Oh, every day.
648
00:43:41,865 --> 00:43:43,532
But...
649
00:43:43,658 --> 00:43:45,784
I don't need a defense anymore.
650
00:43:45,911 --> 00:43:47,620
I embrace.
651
00:43:47,746 --> 00:43:50,289
Still fighting for the big issues...
652
00:43:50,415 --> 00:43:53,876
but now in my small...
653
00:43:54,044 --> 00:43:56,503
individual way.
654
00:43:56,630 --> 00:43:58,881
Shall we have a song?
655
00:43:59,007 --> 00:44:01,050
- I don't play anything.
- Oh, come on.
656
00:44:01,218 --> 00:44:03,510
- I'll show you.
- No...
657
00:44:03,637 --> 00:44:05,804
♪♪ [Humming]
658
00:44:12,812 --> 00:44:15,356
♪ If you want
to sing out, sing out ♪
659
00:44:15,482 --> 00:44:18,567
♪ If you want
to be free, be free ♪
660
00:44:18,735 --> 00:44:21,320
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to be ♪
661
00:44:21,446 --> 00:44:24,573
♪ You know that there are ♪
662
00:44:24,741 --> 00:44:28,577
♪ And if you want
to be high, be high ♪
663
00:44:28,745 --> 00:44:31,705
♪ If you want
to be low, be low ♪
664
00:44:31,831 --> 00:44:34,500
♪ 'Cause there's
a million ways to go ♪
665
00:44:34,626 --> 00:44:36,919
♪ You know that there are ♪
666
00:44:38,129 --> 00:44:41,548
♪ And if you want
to be me, be me ♪
667
00:44:41,675 --> 00:44:44,385
♪ If you want
to be you, be you ♪
668
00:44:44,511 --> 00:44:47,388
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to do ♪
669
00:44:47,514 --> 00:44:50,140
♪ You know that there are ♪
670
00:44:50,267 --> 00:44:51,850
Harold, join in.
671
00:44:51,977 --> 00:44:54,270
♪♪ [Maude Vocalizing]
672
00:44:56,731 --> 00:44:59,149
[Both]
♪ You know that there are ♪
673
00:45:01,611 --> 00:45:04,530
♪ You can do what you want ♪
674
00:45:04,656 --> 00:45:07,700
♪ The opportunity's on ♪
675
00:45:07,826 --> 00:45:11,036
♪ And if you find a new way ♪
676
00:45:11,162 --> 00:45:13,956
♪ You can do it today ♪
677
00:45:14,124 --> 00:45:17,042
♪ You can make it all true ♪
678
00:45:17,168 --> 00:45:19,295
♪ And you can make it undo ♪
679
00:45:19,462 --> 00:45:21,463
♪ You see ♪
680
00:45:21,589 --> 00:45:24,300
♪ Ah, ah, ah, it's easy ♪
681
00:45:24,426 --> 00:45:28,637
♪ Ah, ah, ah, you only
need to know ♪
682
00:45:30,765 --> 00:45:33,267
- ♪♪ [Piano Continues Playing]
- ♪ If you want to sing out, sing out ♪
683
00:45:33,393 --> 00:45:36,478
♪ And if you want
to be free, be free ♪
684
00:45:36,604 --> 00:45:38,981
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to be ♪
685
00:45:39,149 --> 00:45:43,694
♪ You know that there are ♪
686
00:45:43,820 --> 00:45:46,280
♪ You know that there are ♪♪
687
00:45:49,075 --> 00:45:50,993
♪♪ [Ends]
688
00:45:52,620 --> 00:45:55,956
Oh, that was fun!
Let's play something together.
689
00:45:57,375 --> 00:46:00,169
- I don't play anything.
- Nothing?
690
00:46:00,295 --> 00:46:02,838
Dear me!
691
00:46:03,006 --> 00:46:05,341
Everybody should be able
to make some music.
692
00:46:05,508 --> 00:46:08,427
That's the cosmic dance.
Oh, come with me.
693
00:46:08,553 --> 00:46:11,221
There has to be something.
694
00:46:11,348 --> 00:46:14,183
Now, let me see.
695
00:46:14,351 --> 00:46:16,727
Wait a minute. See?
Oh!
696
00:46:16,853 --> 00:46:18,812
Hold on to this.
What is this?
697
00:46:18,938 --> 00:46:20,814
This is it. Here we are.
698
00:46:20,940 --> 00:46:23,734
Now, this is the one.
Take that.
699
00:46:23,860 --> 00:46:27,780
Just be impulsive. Be fanciful.
Let the music flow out of ya.
700
00:46:27,906 --> 00:46:30,366
You've got to make some chords.
701
00:46:30,492 --> 00:46:33,786
Put your finger
on the second fret there...
702
00:46:33,912 --> 00:46:36,497
then this one on the third,
then this one here.
703
00:46:44,130 --> 00:46:46,048
[Mrs. Chasen]
Harold!
704
00:46:49,803 --> 00:46:51,804
Harold?
705
00:46:54,140 --> 00:46:56,600
Harold, dear?
706
00:46:56,726 --> 00:46:58,769
Oh, there you are.
707
00:47:01,398 --> 00:47:04,608
I have a little surprise for you.
708
00:47:04,734 --> 00:47:06,693
It's a present.
709
00:47:11,408 --> 00:47:13,158
Come along.
710
00:47:34,764 --> 00:47:36,598
There.
711
00:47:36,766 --> 00:47:38,517
Isn't it darling?
712
00:47:39,602 --> 00:47:42,020
I had them take away
that monstrous thing of yours...
713
00:47:42,147 --> 00:47:44,231
and send this one 'round instead.
714
00:47:44,357 --> 00:47:46,900
So much more appropriate for you,
don't you think?
715
00:47:49,028 --> 00:47:50,946
Oh, one thing more, Harold.
716
00:47:51,072 --> 00:47:53,240
I telephoned your second
computer date this morning...
717
00:47:53,366 --> 00:47:56,118
and she seems
a very nice, quiet girl.
718
00:47:56,286 --> 00:47:58,120
Cute little thing, isn't it?
719
00:47:58,288 --> 00:48:00,581
I like it very much.
720
00:48:28,776 --> 00:48:30,694
[Alarm Sounds]
721
00:48:48,338 --> 00:48:50,088
Your license, lady.
722
00:48:50,215 --> 00:48:53,175
I don't have one.
I don't believe in them.
723
00:48:55,220 --> 00:48:57,429
How long you been drivin', lady?
724
00:48:57,555 --> 00:48:59,765
About 45 minutes.
Wouldn't you say, Harold?
725
00:48:59,891 --> 00:49:02,184
We were hoping
to start sooner, but you see...
726
00:49:02,310 --> 00:49:04,436
it's rather hard to find a truck.
727
00:49:04,562 --> 00:49:06,438
Is this your truck?
728
00:49:06,564 --> 00:49:09,358
Uh, oh, no.
I just took it.
729
00:49:09,484 --> 00:49:13,278
- You took it?
- Yes. You see, I have to plant my tree.
730
00:49:13,404 --> 00:49:15,531
Well, it's not mine, really...
731
00:49:15,698 --> 00:49:19,826
but we would like to get it into soil
as soon as possible.
732
00:49:21,621 --> 00:49:23,539
Let me get this straight, lady...
733
00:49:23,706 --> 00:49:25,207
All right, then. We'll be off.
734
00:49:25,375 --> 00:49:27,292
Nice chatting with you.
735
00:49:32,340 --> 00:49:35,050
- He was very nice.
- Oh, yeah.
736
00:49:47,146 --> 00:49:48,855
[Siren Wailing]
737
00:49:48,982 --> 00:49:52,234
- I think he's following us.
- Is he?
738
00:49:52,402 --> 00:49:56,572
Tsk. Oh, the police.
Always wanting to play games.
739
00:50:10,044 --> 00:50:11,420
Hey, lady!
740
00:50:47,665 --> 00:50:49,791
Is the little tree all right?
741
00:50:52,211 --> 00:50:53,879
Oh, yeah. Fine.
742
00:50:54,005 --> 00:50:56,590
[Maude]
Terrific!
743
00:51:05,642 --> 00:51:07,643
[Maude]
There.
744
00:51:07,769 --> 00:51:12,064
Mm, I love the feel
of soil, don't you?
745
00:51:12,190 --> 00:51:14,149
And the smell.
746
00:51:15,902 --> 00:51:18,695
It's the earth.
747
00:51:18,821 --> 00:51:20,989
"The earth is my body...
748
00:51:21,115 --> 00:51:23,992
my head is in the stars."
749
00:51:24,160 --> 00:51:26,078
Who said that?
750
00:51:27,413 --> 00:51:29,998
I don't know.
751
00:51:30,166 --> 00:51:32,084
Well, I suppose I did.
752
00:51:34,879 --> 00:51:37,255
Ooh, isn't it wonderful?
753
00:51:37,382 --> 00:51:40,300
All around us, living things!
754
00:51:49,018 --> 00:51:50,936
[Horn Honking]
755
00:51:56,859 --> 00:51:58,860
[Siren Wailing]
756
00:52:45,533 --> 00:52:47,701
All right, out, lady.
757
00:52:48,953 --> 00:52:51,997
- Come on.
- Hello. Haven't we met before?
758
00:52:52,123 --> 00:52:53,999
None of that, lady.
Come on out.
759
00:52:54,125 --> 00:52:58,044
Oh, well. It must've been your brother.
There is a family resemblance.
760
00:53:00,548 --> 00:53:01,757
Out of the car.
761
00:53:01,883 --> 00:53:03,925
Just stand over there, lady.
Just stand over there.
762
00:53:04,093 --> 00:53:06,052
Come on. Get out, buster!
763
00:53:06,179 --> 00:53:08,138
You're in a lot of trouble, lady.
764
00:53:08,264 --> 00:53:11,641
I got you down here
for several offenses, including...
765
00:53:11,768 --> 00:53:14,853
possession of a stolen vehicle,
resisting arrest...
766
00:53:14,979 --> 00:53:17,355
and possession of a stolen tree...
Where's the tree?
767
00:53:17,482 --> 00:53:19,775
- We planted it.
- You planted it.
768
00:53:19,942 --> 00:53:22,110
- Is this your shovel?
- Uh, no.
769
00:53:22,236 --> 00:53:25,781
- [Shovel Clatters]
- Possession of a stolen shovel.
770
00:53:25,907 --> 00:53:28,575
Don't get officious.
You're not yourself when you're officious.
771
00:53:28,701 --> 00:53:31,661
That's the curse
of a government job.
772
00:53:37,752 --> 00:53:39,628
Oh, lady.
773
00:53:41,798 --> 00:53:44,216
Are you gonna take
a lot of time with this?
774
00:53:44,342 --> 00:53:46,426
- Lady, please?
- Because if you are...
775
00:53:46,552 --> 00:53:49,054
Will you be just quiet, please?
776
00:53:53,726 --> 00:53:55,852
[Whispering]
Grab the shovel, Harold!
777
00:54:06,405 --> 00:54:09,282
Lady! Stop, or I'll have to shoot!
[Groans]
778
00:54:14,622 --> 00:54:16,748
[Clicks]
779
00:54:34,684 --> 00:54:36,852
I sure am picking up on vices.
780
00:54:38,145 --> 00:54:41,523
Vice, virtue.
It's best not to be too moral.
781
00:54:41,649 --> 00:54:43,650
You cheat yourself
out of too much life.
782
00:54:43,776 --> 00:54:45,694
Aim above morality.
783
00:54:45,820 --> 00:54:48,822
If you apply that to life...
784
00:54:48,948 --> 00:54:52,033
then you're bound to live it fully.
785
00:54:57,999 --> 00:54:59,916
I haven't lived.
786
00:55:03,713 --> 00:55:05,672
I've died a few times.
787
00:55:05,798 --> 00:55:07,215
What was that?
788
00:55:08,801 --> 00:55:11,344
Well, uh...
789
00:55:12,555 --> 00:55:14,472
the first time...
790
00:55:15,558 --> 00:55:18,476
was when I was at boarding school
in the chemistry lab.
791
00:55:18,603 --> 00:55:20,520
I was in there cleaning it up...
792
00:55:21,564 --> 00:55:25,150
so I decided I'd do
a little experimenting, you know.
793
00:55:25,276 --> 00:55:28,570
So I get all this stuff out
and begin mixing it up.
794
00:55:28,696 --> 00:55:30,280
It was very scientific.
795
00:55:33,326 --> 00:55:35,869
There was this massive explosion.
796
00:55:35,995 --> 00:55:39,581
It knocked me down
and blew out a huge hole in the floor.
797
00:55:39,749 --> 00:55:43,919
There was boards and bricks
and flames leapin' up.
798
00:55:44,086 --> 00:55:46,713
I figured, you know...
799
00:55:46,839 --> 00:55:48,715
time to leave.
800
00:55:48,841 --> 00:55:52,093
My career in school was over.
801
00:55:52,219 --> 00:55:56,056
So, uh, I went home.
802
00:55:56,182 --> 00:55:58,350
My mother was giving a party,
so I just went...
803
00:55:58,476 --> 00:56:01,394
right up the back stairs
and to my room...
804
00:56:01,520 --> 00:56:04,314
turned out the light, and, uh...
805
00:56:04,440 --> 00:56:06,816
I got this funny feeling.
806
00:56:08,027 --> 00:56:12,072
The doorbell rang.
I went out to the banister...
807
00:56:12,198 --> 00:56:15,075
and these two policemen came in...
808
00:56:15,201 --> 00:56:17,786
found my mother...
809
00:56:17,912 --> 00:56:20,956
and, uh, told her...
810
00:56:21,123 --> 00:56:24,459
that I was killed in the fire.
811
00:56:24,627 --> 00:56:28,046
She put one hand up
to her forehead.
812
00:56:28,172 --> 00:56:31,800
With the other she reached out
as if groping for support...
813
00:56:31,968 --> 00:56:35,679
and with this long sigh...
814
00:56:35,805 --> 00:56:39,224
she collapsed in their arms.
815
00:56:54,991 --> 00:56:57,200
[Sobbing]
816
00:57:08,129 --> 00:57:10,755
I decided right then...
817
00:57:10,881 --> 00:57:13,341
that I enjoyed being dead.
818
00:57:14,385 --> 00:57:16,011
I understand.
819
00:57:16,178 --> 00:57:19,055
A lot of people enjoy being dead.
820
00:57:19,181 --> 00:57:21,182
But they're not dead, really.
821
00:57:21,350 --> 00:57:25,603
They're just backing away from life.
822
00:57:25,730 --> 00:57:28,356
Reach out. Take a chance.
823
00:57:29,442 --> 00:57:31,526
Get hurt, even.
824
00:57:31,652 --> 00:57:34,738
But play as well as ya can.
825
00:57:34,864 --> 00:57:37,323
Go, team, go!
826
00:57:37,450 --> 00:57:40,702
Give me an L, give me an I,
give me a V, give me an E.
827
00:57:40,828 --> 00:57:43,705
L-I-V-E, live!
828
00:57:45,374 --> 00:57:49,044
Otherwise you got nothin'
to talk about in the locker room.
829
00:57:59,805 --> 00:58:02,390
I like you, Maude.
830
00:58:03,559 --> 00:58:05,560
I like you, Harold.
831
00:58:09,356 --> 00:58:11,357
♪♪ [Maude Humming]
832
00:58:40,596 --> 00:58:42,722
Harold is down at the garage.
833
00:58:42,848 --> 00:58:45,767
He has a new car,
and he's just been tuning it up.
834
00:58:45,893 --> 00:58:48,311
- He's very mechanical.
- What kind of car is it?
835
00:58:48,437 --> 00:58:51,397
- It's a little Jaguar.
- Oh.
836
00:58:53,567 --> 00:58:55,485
Looks like a hearse.
837
00:58:56,654 --> 00:58:59,531
Very nice. Compact.
838
00:58:59,657 --> 00:59:01,950
Edith, I'd like you to meet
my son, Harold.
839
00:59:02,118 --> 00:59:04,410
Harold, this is Edith...
840
00:59:04,537 --> 00:59:06,204
- Phern.
- Phern.
841
00:59:06,330 --> 00:59:08,206
Very pleased
to make your acquaintance.
842
00:59:08,332 --> 00:59:10,291
I think you should go
and wash up, dear...
843
00:59:10,417 --> 00:59:13,461
and join us in the drawing room.
844
00:59:13,587 --> 00:59:15,463
And what do you do, my dear?
845
00:59:15,589 --> 00:59:18,675
I'm a file clerk
at Harrison Feed and Grain.
846
00:59:18,801 --> 00:59:21,845
Well, what is it exactly
that you do?
847
00:59:21,971 --> 00:59:24,806
I'm in charge of all the invoices
for the southwest.
848
00:59:24,974 --> 00:59:28,143
- How interesting.
- We supply, for example...
849
00:59:28,269 --> 00:59:30,395
most of the egg farmers
in Petaluma.
850
00:59:30,521 --> 00:59:33,148
- So you can imagine.
- Yes.
851
00:59:35,317 --> 00:59:37,318
Oh, here's Harold now.
852
00:59:37,486 --> 00:59:39,487
Don't get up, dear.
853
00:59:45,661 --> 00:59:48,163
Edith has been talking about her job.
854
00:59:48,330 --> 00:59:51,374
- I'm a file clerk.
- Henderson Feed and Grain.
855
00:59:51,500 --> 00:59:53,626
Harrison.
Harrison Feed and Grain.
856
00:59:53,752 --> 00:59:55,628
It's at Hamilton and Fourth...
857
00:59:55,754 --> 00:59:57,672
and I'm in charge of all the invoices.
858
00:59:59,091 --> 01:00:01,509
I type up the schedule
for the trucking fleet.
859
01:00:01,635 --> 01:00:04,512
She supplies the whole southwest
with chicken feed.
860
01:00:04,680 --> 01:00:07,307
Well, not exactly
the whole southwest...
861
01:00:07,433 --> 01:00:09,601
although we do do
a large business.
862
01:00:09,727 --> 01:00:11,603
Barley was very big last week.
863
01:00:11,729 --> 01:00:14,397
Fifteen hundred... bushels.
864
01:00:36,003 --> 01:00:38,713
In view of
your recent actions, Harold...
865
01:00:38,839 --> 01:00:41,132
I find you have left me
with no recourse...
866
01:00:41,258 --> 01:00:43,885
but to listen to the solution
proposed by your uncle.
867
01:00:44,011 --> 01:00:47,138
Consequently,
I have instruCted him forthwith...
868
01:00:47,264 --> 01:00:49,224
to induct you into the service...
869
01:00:49,350 --> 01:00:52,977
and, for your own good,
to take up active duty...
870
01:00:53,103 --> 01:00:55,605
with the United States Army.
871
01:00:56,732 --> 01:01:00,568
And I hope they have
more luck with you than I.
872
01:01:02,196 --> 01:01:05,406
[Harold]
Maude, they're gonna draft me.
873
01:01:05,532 --> 01:01:07,617
[Maude]
Well, don't go.
874
01:01:07,743 --> 01:01:09,702
[Harold]
They'll put me in jail.
875
01:01:09,828 --> 01:01:12,622
[Maude] Well, historically,
you'd be in very good company.
876
01:01:18,045 --> 01:01:20,880
[Harold]
Maude, can you help me?
877
01:01:21,006 --> 01:01:23,424
[Maude] Well, with your skill
and my experience...
878
01:01:23,592 --> 01:01:25,927
I think we can come up
with something.
879
01:01:27,137 --> 01:01:29,681
[Victor] Harold, I want you to look
at me like your father in this matter.
880
01:01:29,807 --> 01:01:32,934
Oh, I know you have no desire
to join the army, but once you're in...
881
01:01:33,102 --> 01:01:35,436
you'll love it.
882
01:01:35,562 --> 01:01:37,939
It's a great life. Look at me.
883
01:01:38,107 --> 01:01:41,317
A chauffeur. Respect.
Money in the bank.
884
01:01:42,611 --> 01:01:46,155
Oh, it has its drawbacks,
like anything else, I suppose.
885
01:01:46,282 --> 01:01:48,199
But the army takes care of you.
886
01:01:48,325 --> 01:01:51,452
And you've got a buddy for life.
887
01:01:51,620 --> 01:01:53,955
♪♪ [Chauffeur Whistling]
888
01:01:54,123 --> 01:01:55,957
[Victor]
Good idea comin' out here, Harold.
889
01:01:56,125 --> 01:01:58,710
- It's a lovely spot.
- Thank you, Uncle.
890
01:01:58,836 --> 01:02:02,297
Call me "sir," Harold.
It's the first thing you learn in the army.
891
01:02:02,423 --> 01:02:04,424
An officer deserves your respect.
892
01:02:04,550 --> 01:02:06,259
[Harold]
Yes, sir.
893
01:02:07,511 --> 01:02:09,804
Now, let's examine the facts on it.
894
01:02:10,973 --> 01:02:12,932
I say this country
has been too harsh...
895
01:02:13,058 --> 01:02:16,060
in its outright condemnation of war.
896
01:02:16,186 --> 01:02:19,147
I say you can point to the many
material advantages brought about...
897
01:02:19,273 --> 01:02:21,816
by a crisis-and-conflict policy.
898
01:02:21,984 --> 01:02:25,611
- Hell, World War II gave us the ballpoint pen.
- [Man Groaning, Wheezing]
899
01:02:25,738 --> 01:02:28,364
During wartime,
the national suicide rate goes down.
900
01:02:28,490 --> 01:02:29,782
Is that a faCt?
901
01:02:29,908 --> 01:02:33,494
Now, why in hell
did we give up on the Germans?
902
01:02:33,620 --> 01:02:37,749
Since the damn politicians in Washington
chalked them up on our side...
903
01:02:37,875 --> 01:02:40,668
the wars ever since
have been a national disgrace.
904
01:02:40,836 --> 01:02:42,503
Hell, look at history.
905
01:02:42,629 --> 01:02:46,299
Why, the two best wars this country
ever fought were against the Jerries.
906
01:02:46,425 --> 01:02:49,344
I say get the Krauts on the other side
of the fence where they belong.
907
01:02:49,511 --> 01:02:51,637
Let's get back
to the kind of enemy worth killing...
908
01:02:51,764 --> 01:02:54,515
and the kind of war
this whole country can support.
909
01:02:54,683 --> 01:02:57,143
Wow.
That's pretty strong stuff, sir.
910
01:02:58,312 --> 01:03:01,356
Well, Harold, I've always been
a man who speaks his piece.
911
01:03:02,691 --> 01:03:05,985
Oh, it's hurt me.
I'm not liked in Washington.
912
01:03:06,111 --> 01:03:08,154
I know that.
913
01:03:08,280 --> 01:03:10,782
But I do have friends in high places.
914
01:03:12,993 --> 01:03:16,579
[Victor Imitating Machine-Gun Fire]
They kept falling. Zock!
915
01:03:16,705 --> 01:03:19,499
Joe falls back, a neat red hole
in the middle of his head.
916
01:03:19,625 --> 01:03:23,711
[Imitating Machine-Gun Fire]
Only one thing kept going through my mind:
917
01:03:23,837 --> 01:03:26,547
"Kill! Kill! For Joe...
918
01:03:26,673 --> 01:03:29,092
and Mac and all
the rest of the guys.
919
01:03:29,218 --> 01:03:32,011
Kill!" And then
there was a blinding flash!
920
01:03:36,725 --> 01:03:39,685
And I woke up on the stretcher.
921
01:03:43,482 --> 01:03:45,983
"Did we hold?"
I asked the medic.
922
01:03:47,069 --> 01:03:48,694
"Yes, sir!" he said.
923
01:03:53,367 --> 01:03:57,120
And I slipped
into unconsciousness.
924
01:03:58,288 --> 01:04:00,623
Boy! Wow!
925
01:04:00,749 --> 01:04:03,584
That's a terrific story, sir.
926
01:04:04,795 --> 01:04:06,796
Well...
927
01:04:06,922 --> 01:04:09,590
you'll have stories like that to tell
of your own someday, Harold.
928
01:04:09,716 --> 01:04:12,093
- Do you think so, sir?
- Sure, you will.
929
01:04:12,261 --> 01:04:15,888
Gee, I never dreamed
it could be that... exciting.
930
01:04:16,014 --> 01:04:18,599
Ah, it's the most exciting thing
in the world, Harold.
931
01:04:18,725 --> 01:04:20,101
To pit...
932
01:04:20,227 --> 01:04:23,104
- your own life against another.
- Yes!
933
01:04:23,230 --> 01:04:25,273
To kill.
934
01:04:25,441 --> 01:04:27,859
The taste of blood in your mouth.
935
01:04:27,985 --> 01:04:30,111
The moment of truth.
936
01:04:30,279 --> 01:04:33,114
Another man's life in your sights!
937
01:04:33,240 --> 01:04:34,615
- Yes!
- Zat!
938
01:04:34,783 --> 01:04:37,785
- Will they really teach me to shoot?
- Sure, they will. A variety of weapons.
939
01:04:37,911 --> 01:04:39,745
- To use a bayonet?
- Yes!
940
01:04:39,872 --> 01:04:42,707
Hah!
How about hand-to-hand combat?
941
01:04:42,833 --> 01:04:45,460
- Yes.
- To strangle someone! Choke him!
942
01:04:45,627 --> 01:04:48,087
Squeeze out his life
in your own bare hands!
943
01:04:48,213 --> 01:04:50,089
I think you're getting
carried away, Harold.
944
01:04:50,215 --> 01:04:52,967
- How about to slit his throat?
- Well, I don't know about that.
945
01:04:53,135 --> 01:04:55,720
I'd like that. You could see the blood
squirt out. How about souvenirs?
946
01:04:55,846 --> 01:04:57,638
- Souvenirs?
- Of your kill.
947
01:04:57,764 --> 01:05:00,808
Eyes, ears, nose, scalp, privates.
948
01:05:00,934 --> 01:05:03,478
- Harold!
- Hey, what would be the chance...
949
01:05:03,604 --> 01:05:05,563
of getting one of these?
950
01:05:05,689 --> 01:05:07,732
Boy, to think I could maybe
make my own!
951
01:05:07,858 --> 01:05:11,027
- Harold, that's disgusting!
- It certainly is!
952
01:05:11,153 --> 01:05:14,614
- Madam, who are you?
- I am petitioning for peace.
953
01:05:14,740 --> 01:05:16,073
- Parasite!
- Harold!
954
01:05:16,200 --> 01:05:18,201
- And I came out here to speak.
- Crazy parasite!
955
01:05:18,327 --> 01:05:20,828
- Harold!
- Commie bastard! Get the hell out of here!
956
01:05:20,996 --> 01:05:22,538
Don't you talk to me like that...
957
01:05:22,664 --> 01:05:24,749
- you little foulmouthed degenerate!
- Traitor! BenediCt Arnold!
958
01:05:24,875 --> 01:05:27,543
- Remember Nathan Hale! Right, sir?
- Harold, calm down.
959
01:05:27,669 --> 01:05:31,047
- She's a commie pig!
- Don't you advance on me.
960
01:05:31,173 --> 01:05:32,673
You'll all end up like this!
961
01:05:32,841 --> 01:05:35,009
- Ooh! Ooh!
- Just like this!
962
01:05:35,135 --> 01:05:36,511
- Ooh, filth!
- Harold!
963
01:05:36,678 --> 01:05:38,721
Ooh! Give me that.
I'm gonna throw that...
964
01:05:38,847 --> 01:05:40,723
- in the sewer, where it belongs.
- Madam, please!
965
01:05:40,849 --> 01:05:43,184
- She took my head.
- Calm down, Harold.
966
01:05:43,310 --> 01:05:46,187
- She took my head! I'll kill her!
- Calm down. Harold!
967
01:05:46,313 --> 01:05:48,731
- I'll kill her!
- Harold!
968
01:05:48,857 --> 01:05:50,858
- [Maude, Harold Screaming]
- Madam!
969
01:05:50,984 --> 01:05:53,861
Give back the head.
Let's have no troubles. Harold!
970
01:05:54,029 --> 01:05:56,739
- [Screaming Continues]
- Madam!
971
01:05:56,865 --> 01:05:58,950
Harold! Damn you!
972
01:05:59,076 --> 01:06:01,410
Just a minute!
973
01:06:01,537 --> 01:06:03,788
You traitor!
974
01:06:03,914 --> 01:06:06,541
- I'll kill you!
- Harold!
975
01:06:06,667 --> 01:06:08,709
You commie bastard!
976
01:06:08,877 --> 01:06:13,047
- I'll kill you! You... [Screaming]
- Harold!
977
01:06:13,173 --> 01:06:16,592
Stop it! Harold! Harold!
978
01:06:18,554 --> 01:06:20,471
[Splash]
979
01:06:37,614 --> 01:06:39,740
What have you done?
980
01:06:39,908 --> 01:06:41,826
[Birds Chirping]
981
01:06:44,788 --> 01:06:46,414
Maude?
982
01:06:46,540 --> 01:06:48,332
Hmm?
983
01:06:49,876 --> 01:06:51,586
Do you pray?
984
01:06:52,754 --> 01:06:54,672
"Pray"? No.
985
01:06:54,798 --> 01:06:57,258
I communicate.
986
01:06:57,384 --> 01:06:59,385
With God?
987
01:06:59,511 --> 01:07:01,387
With life.
988
01:07:05,517 --> 01:07:07,935
- [Harold] This is real nice.
- Yeah.
989
01:07:08,103 --> 01:07:09,979
[Harold] Makes me
want to do somersaults.
990
01:07:10,105 --> 01:07:13,858
- Well, why don't you?
- [Harold Chuckles] I'd feel stupid.
991
01:07:13,984 --> 01:07:16,402
Harold...
992
01:07:16,528 --> 01:07:19,363
everyone has the right to make
an ass out of themselves.
993
01:07:19,489 --> 01:07:22,491
You can't let the world
judge you too much.
994
01:07:26,038 --> 01:07:27,955
- [Exhales Forcefully]
- [Chuckles]
995
01:07:33,629 --> 01:07:35,838
[Maude Chuckling]
996
01:07:41,928 --> 01:07:45,973
Uh, do you care to join me
in a little cartwheel?
997
01:07:47,100 --> 01:07:51,437
No, I feel more like yelling.
998
01:07:51,563 --> 01:07:53,814
[Yelling]
999
01:07:55,150 --> 01:07:57,193
[Tarzan Yell]
1000
01:08:00,656 --> 01:08:04,200
♪ Well, if you want
to sing out, sing out ♪
1001
01:08:04,326 --> 01:08:07,828
♪ And if you want
to be free, be free ♪
1002
01:08:07,954 --> 01:08:11,332
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to be ♪
1003
01:08:11,500 --> 01:08:13,459
♪ You know that there are ♪
1004
01:08:15,462 --> 01:08:19,006
♪ And if you want
to be me, be me ♪
1005
01:08:19,132 --> 01:08:22,009
♪ And if you want
to be you, be you ♪
1006
01:08:22,135 --> 01:08:25,805
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to do ♪
1007
01:08:25,931 --> 01:08:28,015
♪ You know that there are ♪
1008
01:08:31,353 --> 01:08:33,479
♪ You can do what you want ♪
1009
01:08:34,773 --> 01:08:37,817
♪ The opportunity's on ♪
1010
01:08:37,984 --> 01:08:40,903
♪ And if you find a new way ♪
1011
01:08:42,072 --> 01:08:44,407
♪ You can do it today ♪
1012
01:08:45,659 --> 01:08:48,452
♪ You can make it all true ♪
1013
01:08:49,496 --> 01:08:51,622
♪ And you can make it undo ♪
1014
01:08:51,748 --> 01:08:53,791
♪ You see ♪♪
1015
01:08:58,213 --> 01:09:00,005
Maude...
1016
01:09:01,216 --> 01:09:04,260
I had the most wonderful day today.
1017
01:09:04,386 --> 01:09:06,345
And...
1018
01:09:07,389 --> 01:09:09,598
you're very beautiful.
1019
01:09:11,435 --> 01:09:15,062
Oh, Harold.
[Chuckling, Squealing]
1020
01:09:15,188 --> 01:09:17,982
You make me feel
like a schoolgirl.
1021
01:09:26,867 --> 01:09:30,077
Shall I come and visit you tomorrow?
Oh, I can't.
1022
01:09:30,203 --> 01:09:34,248
I have a luncheon, uh, date...
with a girl.
1023
01:09:35,792 --> 01:09:37,752
- Oh.
- Well, I don't even know her.
1024
01:09:37,919 --> 01:09:40,212
My mother arranged it.
1025
01:09:44,050 --> 01:09:47,219
[Gasps]
Look! Oh!
1026
01:09:48,597 --> 01:09:51,515
Dreyfus once wrote
from Devil's Island that he would see...
1027
01:09:51,641 --> 01:09:53,893
the most glorious birds.
1028
01:09:54,019 --> 01:09:55,895
Many years later in Brittany...
1029
01:09:56,021 --> 01:10:00,274
he realized
they had only been seagulls.
1030
01:10:00,400 --> 01:10:03,694
♪ Ah, ah, ah, it's easy ♪
1031
01:10:03,820 --> 01:10:07,114
♪ Ah, ah, ah, you only
need to know♪
1032
01:10:07,240 --> 01:10:10,785
To me they will
always be glorious birds.
1033
01:10:10,952 --> 01:10:14,371
♪ Well, if you want
to sing out, sing out ♪
1034
01:10:14,498 --> 01:10:17,792
♪ And if you want
to be free, be free ♪
1035
01:10:17,959 --> 01:10:21,086
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to be ♪
1036
01:10:21,213 --> 01:10:28,552
♪ You know that there are
You know that there are ♪
1037
01:10:28,678 --> 01:10:32,056
♪ You know that there are ♪♪
1038
01:10:36,019 --> 01:10:39,522
Now, Harold, I cannot impress
upon you too strongly...
1039
01:10:39,648 --> 01:10:41,482
the importance of this meeting.
1040
01:10:41,650 --> 01:10:45,986
This is the last girl, so kindly remember
that this is your third and final chance.
1041
01:10:46,112 --> 01:10:48,531
And please try
to be serious, Harold.
1042
01:10:48,657 --> 01:10:51,408
If not for your sake,
at least for hers.
1043
01:10:51,535 --> 01:10:53,494
Oh, there she is.
1044
01:10:53,620 --> 01:10:56,038
Sunshine, I'd like you
to meet Harold.
1045
01:10:56,164 --> 01:10:58,374
Harold, this is Sunshine Doré.
1046
01:10:58,500 --> 01:11:02,795
- Howdy... How do you do?
- Oh, I can't complain.
1047
01:11:03,880 --> 01:11:05,965
Sunshine is an actress, Harold.
1048
01:11:06,091 --> 01:11:08,843
- I like to think so.
- Mm, wonderful.
1049
01:11:08,969 --> 01:11:11,929
Well, now, why don't you two
go along down...
1050
01:11:12,055 --> 01:11:14,515
to the music room,
and I'll follow on later with some drinks?
1051
01:11:14,641 --> 01:11:17,268
Oh, perhaps Starlight
would like a cigarette.
1052
01:11:17,394 --> 01:11:21,105
- Ooh! "Sunshine."
- Oh, yes, of course.
1053
01:11:21,231 --> 01:11:23,023
Sunshine.
1054
01:11:25,694 --> 01:11:28,028
[Door Opens, Closes]
1055
01:11:34,536 --> 01:11:35,870
Ooh!
1056
01:11:41,167 --> 01:11:43,252
Would you like a cigarette?
1057
01:11:43,378 --> 01:11:46,547
No, thank you.
They stain my fingers.
1058
01:11:46,673 --> 01:11:49,800
Is Sunshine your real name?
1059
01:11:49,926 --> 01:11:54,054
Well, actually it was the name
of my drama teacher. Louis Sunshine.
1060
01:11:54,180 --> 01:11:56,056
Perhaps you've heard of him.
[Gasps]
1061
01:11:56,182 --> 01:11:58,183
He was such an influence...
1062
01:11:58,310 --> 01:12:01,270
on the development
of my instrument.
1063
01:12:01,396 --> 01:12:04,857
That means "my body"
in theater talk.
1064
01:12:04,983 --> 01:12:08,235
Doré is my real name.
1065
01:12:08,361 --> 01:12:11,655
Well, Dorr, actually.
1066
01:12:11,781 --> 01:12:16,410
Oh, my, what a lovely place
you have here!
1067
01:12:17,454 --> 01:12:19,747
[Door Creaking]
1068
01:12:26,046 --> 01:12:27,922
Oh, do you play?
1069
01:12:28,048 --> 01:12:29,924
No.
1070
01:12:30,050 --> 01:12:33,093
I am learning the ba...
the harmonica.
1071
01:12:35,055 --> 01:12:38,349
Oh, is this your father?
1072
01:12:38,475 --> 01:12:41,101
No. My Uncle Victor.
1073
01:12:41,227 --> 01:12:43,646
He's in the army.
1074
01:12:43,772 --> 01:12:48,025
I do so like the military,
don't you?
1075
01:12:48,151 --> 01:12:50,611
Oh! What a wonderful
colleCtion of knives!
1076
01:12:50,737 --> 01:12:53,405
- May I see them?
- No, no, don't touch. They're very old.
1077
01:12:53,531 --> 01:12:55,866
Do you enjoy knives?
1078
01:12:55,992 --> 01:12:57,618
Oh, yes.
1079
01:12:57,786 --> 01:13:00,621
You might find this one
particularly interesting.
1080
01:13:00,789 --> 01:13:02,957
It's a hara-kiri blade.
1081
01:13:03,124 --> 01:13:06,293
[Excited Chuckle]
What's hara-kiri?
1082
01:14:13,486 --> 01:14:17,031
[Cries Out]
1083
01:14:17,198 --> 01:14:19,116
[Groaning]
1084
01:14:24,372 --> 01:14:26,999
Sukiyaki!
1085
01:14:33,965 --> 01:14:36,842
Oh!
1086
01:14:36,968 --> 01:14:39,511
Harold!
1087
01:14:39,637 --> 01:14:43,307
Oh, that was marvelous!
1088
01:14:43,433 --> 01:14:46,143
Oh, it had the ring of truth!
1089
01:14:46,269 --> 01:14:48,896
I played Juliet...
1090
01:14:49,064 --> 01:14:51,190
in the Sunshine Playhouse.
1091
01:14:51,316 --> 01:14:53,734
Louie thought it was
my best performance.
1092
01:14:56,362 --> 01:14:57,905
[Declaiming]
What's here?
1093
01:14:58,031 --> 01:15:02,034
A cup?
Closèd in my true love's hand?
1094
01:15:02,160 --> 01:15:03,994
[Sniffing]
1095
01:15:04,120 --> 01:15:05,746
Poison, I see...
1096
01:15:05,914 --> 01:15:10,167
hath been his timeless end.
1097
01:15:10,293 --> 01:15:13,921
Oh, happy dagger...
1098
01:15:14,964 --> 01:15:17,966
Oh, happy dagger...
1099
01:15:18,093 --> 01:15:19,968
this is thy sheath.
1100
01:15:20,095 --> 01:15:22,096
There rest...
[Groans]
1101
01:15:22,222 --> 01:15:26,350
And let me die!
[Cries Out]
1102
01:15:26,476 --> 01:15:28,769
[Groaning]
1103
01:15:33,608 --> 01:15:36,777
I fall.
[Weak Groaning]
1104
01:15:48,665 --> 01:15:51,458
[Gasps]
Harold!
1105
01:15:56,798 --> 01:15:59,174
That was your last date!
1106
01:16:05,723 --> 01:16:08,058
- ♪♪ [Calliope]
- [Raucous Laughter]
1107
01:16:13,231 --> 01:16:15,357
[People Screaming]
1108
01:16:35,879 --> 01:16:38,213
That wasn't very scary.
1109
01:16:38,339 --> 01:16:40,966
No. It had nothing
on this afternoon.
1110
01:16:41,092 --> 01:16:43,468
Oh, come on. You loved it.
1111
01:16:43,595 --> 01:16:46,847
- It was a new experience.
- [Maude Chuckles]
1112
01:16:46,973 --> 01:16:48,891
[Train Whistles Blowing]
1113
01:17:24,844 --> 01:17:27,179
- [Bell Rings]
- [All Laughing]
1114
01:17:38,191 --> 01:17:40,108
[People Cheering]
1115
01:17:43,363 --> 01:17:45,322
[Harold]
You sure have a way with people.
1116
01:17:45,448 --> 01:17:48,909
[Maude Chuckles]
Well, they're my species.
1117
01:17:53,081 --> 01:17:54,957
[Harold]
Look at these stars.
1118
01:17:55,083 --> 01:17:56,875
[Maude]
Mm.
1119
01:18:00,088 --> 01:18:01,964
Maude?
1120
01:18:02,090 --> 01:18:04,049
Yes?
1121
01:18:10,390 --> 01:18:13,183
- Here.
- [Gasps]
1122
01:18:13,309 --> 01:18:15,269
A gift.
1123
01:18:21,442 --> 01:18:23,568
"Harold loves Maude."
1124
01:18:29,367 --> 01:18:32,119
And Maude loves Harold.
1125
01:18:35,456 --> 01:18:38,083
This is the nicest present...
1126
01:18:38,209 --> 01:18:40,585
that I've received in years.
1127
01:18:47,260 --> 01:18:49,177
[Splash]
1128
01:18:51,264 --> 01:18:54,641
So I'll always know where it is.
1129
01:19:15,538 --> 01:19:18,165
♪ I think I see the light ♪
1130
01:19:18,333 --> 01:19:22,753
♪ Comin' to me
Comin' through me ♪
1131
01:19:22,879 --> 01:19:25,797
♪ Givin' me a second sight ♪
1132
01:19:28,509 --> 01:19:31,511
♪ So shine, shine, shine ♪
1133
01:19:31,679 --> 01:19:42,773
♪ Shine, shine, shine ♪
1134
01:19:42,899 --> 01:19:47,110
♪ Shine, shine, shine ♪♪
1135
01:19:52,909 --> 01:19:55,452
Oh, could I speak with Fay, please?
1136
01:19:57,872 --> 01:20:02,250
Fay? Darling, I know
René will be furious, but...
1137
01:20:02,377 --> 01:20:05,212
Well, if he knew what I had
to put up with in the last few days...
1138
01:20:05,380 --> 01:20:07,214
- Mother?
- Not now, dear.
1139
01:20:07,382 --> 01:20:09,216
So could you put me down
for Monday?
1140
01:20:09,384 --> 01:20:12,511
- Mother, I'd like to talk to you for a minute.
- I'm on the phone, dear.
1141
01:20:12,637 --> 01:20:16,223
- I'm getting married.
- What did you say?
1142
01:20:17,975 --> 01:20:19,726
I'm getting married.
1143
01:20:22,105 --> 01:20:24,147
Hold the line, Fay.
1144
01:20:26,275 --> 01:20:28,235
To whom?
1145
01:20:34,909 --> 01:20:37,953
I suppose you think
this is very funny, Harold.
1146
01:20:38,079 --> 01:20:39,996
A sunflower.
1147
01:20:46,212 --> 01:20:49,089
You can't be serious!
1148
01:21:10,653 --> 01:21:12,612
[Footsteps Marching]
1149
01:21:12,780 --> 01:21:16,450
Harold, your mother has spoken to me
about your marriage plan.
1150
01:21:16,617 --> 01:21:19,453
And although normally
I have nothing against marriage...
1151
01:21:19,620 --> 01:21:21,663
- [Man] Troop...
- I don't think this is quite...
1152
01:21:21,789 --> 01:21:24,291
- hup!
- Uh, normal.
1153
01:21:24,459 --> 01:21:26,460
A very common neurosis...
1154
01:21:26,627 --> 01:21:29,087
particularly in this society...
1155
01:21:29,213 --> 01:21:32,466
whereby the male child
subconsciously...
1156
01:21:32,633 --> 01:21:35,260
wishes to sleep with his mother.
1157
01:21:35,386 --> 01:21:37,762
Of course,
what puzzles me, Harold...
1158
01:21:37,889 --> 01:21:40,807
is that you want to sleep
with your grandmother.
1159
01:21:40,975 --> 01:21:44,144
I would be remiss in my duty...
1160
01:21:44,270 --> 01:21:46,021
if I did not tell you...
1161
01:21:47,106 --> 01:21:49,024
that the idea of...
1162
01:21:51,569 --> 01:21:53,487
interCourse...
1163
01:21:55,948 --> 01:21:58,533
the fact of your firm young...
1164
01:22:00,328 --> 01:22:02,204
body...
1165
01:22:05,041 --> 01:22:07,000
commingling...
1166
01:22:08,586 --> 01:22:10,754
with the...
1167
01:22:10,880 --> 01:22:13,006
withered flesh...
1168
01:22:14,342 --> 01:22:16,510
sagging...
1169
01:22:16,636 --> 01:22:19,012
breasts...
1170
01:22:19,138 --> 01:22:22,224
and... flabby...
1171
01:22:24,018 --> 01:22:25,977
bu...
1172
01:22:27,522 --> 01:22:29,481
buttocks...
1173
01:22:31,400 --> 01:22:33,610
makes me want...
1174
01:22:35,738 --> 01:22:38,114
to vomit.
1175
01:22:38,241 --> 01:22:40,158
[Maude]
Mm.
1176
01:22:49,919 --> 01:22:51,878
Oh, Harold!
1177
01:22:53,089 --> 01:22:55,882
It's dazzling.
1178
01:23:01,389 --> 01:23:04,182
♪♪ [Harold Vocalizing]
1179
01:23:27,415 --> 01:23:30,041
You've thought of everything.
1180
01:23:30,167 --> 01:23:32,586
And champagne.
[Inhales Deeply]
1181
01:23:32,753 --> 01:23:34,671
It's all right. It's organic.
1182
01:23:36,424 --> 01:23:38,258
Oh, Harold.
1183
01:23:42,388 --> 01:23:44,139
For you.
1184
01:23:48,686 --> 01:23:50,604
And, uh...
1185
01:23:52,064 --> 01:23:54,107
after dinner...
1186
01:24:00,823 --> 01:24:02,991
one more little surprise...
1187
01:24:05,453 --> 01:24:08,997
that I hope
will make you very happy.
1188
01:24:09,123 --> 01:24:11,291
Oh, Harold.
1189
01:24:11,459 --> 01:24:13,418
I am happy.
1190
01:24:20,134 --> 01:24:23,511
I couldn't imagine
a lovelier farewell.
1191
01:24:26,974 --> 01:24:29,434
Farewell?
1192
01:24:29,560 --> 01:24:31,478
Yes, it's my 80th birthday.
1193
01:24:34,482 --> 01:24:37,108
Well, you're not goin' anywhere.
1194
01:24:38,778 --> 01:24:40,654
- Are you?
- Yes, dear.
1195
01:24:40,780 --> 01:24:44,532
I took the tablets an hour ago.
1196
01:24:44,659 --> 01:24:47,035
I'll be gone by midnight.
1197
01:25:02,718 --> 01:25:04,094
What?
1198
01:25:04,220 --> 01:25:06,179
[Siren Wailing]
1199
01:25:10,226 --> 01:25:14,145
[Maude]
What a fuss this is. So unnecessary.
1200
01:25:14,271 --> 01:25:17,148
Don't die, Maude, for chrissake.
1201
01:25:17,274 --> 01:25:20,360
Oh, Harold.
1202
01:25:20,486 --> 01:25:23,530
Don't upset yourself so.
1203
01:25:23,656 --> 01:25:28,243
I love you!
1204
01:25:30,413 --> 01:25:32,872
Oh, Harold.
1205
01:25:32,998 --> 01:25:35,750
That is wonderful.
1206
01:25:37,378 --> 01:25:40,422
Go and love some more.
1207
01:25:42,341 --> 01:25:43,925
No.
1208
01:25:45,594 --> 01:25:49,055
Never. Never.
[Sobbing]
1209
01:25:49,223 --> 01:25:51,099
♪ Trouble ♪
1210
01:25:51,225 --> 01:25:54,853
♪ Oh, trouble, set me free ♪
1211
01:25:55,980 --> 01:25:58,064
♪ I have seen your face ♪
1212
01:25:58,190 --> 01:26:02,193
♪ And it's too much
too much for me ♪
1213
01:26:04,238 --> 01:26:06,281
♪ Trouble ♪
1214
01:26:06,407 --> 01:26:09,909
♪ Oh, trouble, can't you see ♪
1215
01:26:11,078 --> 01:26:13,079
♪ You're eatin' my heart away ♪
1216
01:26:13,205 --> 01:26:16,916
♪ And there's
nothing much left of me ♪
1217
01:26:19,378 --> 01:26:24,215
♪ I drunk your wine ♪
1218
01:26:24,341 --> 01:26:27,761
♪ You have made your work mine ♪
1219
01:26:27,887 --> 01:26:34,267
♪ So won't you be fair ♪
1220
01:26:35,478 --> 01:26:40,106
♪ I don't want no more ♪
1221
01:26:40,232 --> 01:26:42,108
♪ Of you ♪
1222
01:26:42,234 --> 01:26:45,111
♪ So won't you be kind to me ♪
1223
01:26:45,237 --> 01:26:48,448
♪ Just let me go where ♪
1224
01:26:48,616 --> 01:26:51,785
♪ I have to go there ♪
1225
01:26:52,828 --> 01:26:55,538
- [No Audible Dialogue]
- ♪ Trouble, oh ♪
1226
01:26:55,664 --> 01:26:59,584
♪ Trouble, move away ♪
1227
01:26:59,710 --> 01:27:02,420
♪ I have seen your face ♪
1228
01:27:02,546 --> 01:27:06,674
♪ And it's too much for me today ♪
1229
01:27:07,927 --> 01:27:11,262
♪ Trouble, oh ♪
1230
01:27:11,388 --> 01:27:14,808
♪ Trouble, can't you see ♪
1231
01:27:14,934 --> 01:27:17,519
♪ You have made me a wreck ♪
1232
01:27:17,645 --> 01:27:20,855
♪ Now, won't you leave me
in my misery ♪
1233
01:27:23,651 --> 01:27:27,821
♪ I seen your eyes ♪
1234
01:27:27,988 --> 01:27:31,825
♪ And I can see death's disguise ♪
1235
01:27:31,951 --> 01:27:34,536
♪ Hanging on me ♪
1236
01:27:34,662 --> 01:27:36,996
- [Engine Revving]
- ♪ Hanging on me ♪
1237
01:27:40,000 --> 01:27:45,088
♪ Ah, I'm beat, I'm torn ♪
1238
01:27:45,214 --> 01:27:48,842
♪ Shattered and tossed
and worn ♪
1239
01:27:48,968 --> 01:27:55,139
♪ Too shocking to see ♪
1240
01:27:57,142 --> 01:27:59,018
♪ Trouble ♪
1241
01:27:59,144 --> 01:28:02,647
♪ Oh, trouble, move from me ♪
1242
01:28:04,275 --> 01:28:06,317
♪ I have paid my debt ♪
1243
01:28:06,443 --> 01:28:09,988
♪ Now won't you leave me
in my misery ♪
1244
01:28:11,407 --> 01:28:13,616
♪ Trouble ♪
1245
01:28:13,742 --> 01:28:17,203
♪ Oh, trouble, please be kind ♪
1246
01:28:18,873 --> 01:28:20,915
♪ I don't want no fight ♪
1247
01:28:21,041 --> 01:28:24,460
♪ And I haven't got
a lot of time ♪♪
1248
01:28:24,587 --> 01:28:26,546
[Engine Revving]
1249
01:29:49,213 --> 01:29:52,131
♪♪ ["If You Want
To Sing Out, Sing Out]
1250
01:30:16,156 --> 01:30:19,659
♪ Well, if you want
to sing out, sing out ♪
1251
01:30:19,827 --> 01:30:23,496
♪ And if you want
to be free, be free ♪
1252
01:30:23,664 --> 01:30:26,833
♪ 'Cause there's
a million things to be ♪
1253
01:30:26,959 --> 01:30:29,002
♪ You know that there are ♪
1254
01:30:30,838 --> 01:30:34,507
♪ And if you want
to live high, live high ♪
1255
01:30:34,633 --> 01:30:38,344
♪ And if you want
to live low, live low ♪
1256
01:30:38,470 --> 01:30:41,514
♪ 'Cause there's
a million ways to go ♪
1257
01:30:41,682 --> 01:30:44,142
♪ You know that there are ♪
1258
01:30:46,729 --> 01:30:48,688
♪ You can do what you want ♪
1259
01:30:50,357 --> 01:30:52,692
♪ The opportunity's on ♪
1260
01:30:54,028 --> 01:30:56,154
♪ And if you find a new way ♪
1261
01:30:57,656 --> 01:31:00,116
♪ You can do it today ♪
1262
01:31:01,326 --> 01:31:03,703
♪ You can make it all true ♪
1263
01:31:04,997 --> 01:31:07,123
♪ And you can make it undo ♪
1264
01:31:07,249 --> 01:31:09,542
♪ You see ♪
1265
01:31:09,710 --> 01:31:13,171
♪ Ah, ah, ah, it's easy ♪
1266
01:31:13,297 --> 01:31:15,923
♪ Ah, ah, ah, you only ♪
1267
01:31:16,050 --> 01:31:18,217
♪ Need to know ♪
1268
01:31:20,554 --> 01:31:23,014
♪ Well, if you want
to say yes, say yes ♪
1269
01:31:24,224 --> 01:31:27,310
♪ And if you want
to say no, say no ♪♪
87963
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