Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Ewe
Faroese
Filipino
Finnish
French
Frisian
Ga
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hindi
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Igbo
Indonesian
Interlingua
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kannada
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kurdish (Soranî)
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lingala
Lithuanian
Lozi
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Malayalam
Maltese
Maori
Marathi
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Nigerian Pidgin
Northern Sotho
Norwegian
Norwegian (Nynorsk)
Occitan
Oriya
Oromo
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Punjabi
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Runyakitara
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Serbo-Croatian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Spanish (Latin American)
Sundanese
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Tatar
Telugu
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Tshiluba
Tumbuka
Turkish
Turkmen
Twi
Uighur
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof
Xhosa
Yiddish
Yoruba
Zulu
♪Love, exciting and new.♪
♪Come board, we're expecting you.♪
♪Love, life's sweetest reward♪
♪let it flow, it floats back to you.♪
♪Love boat soon will be making another run.♪
♪The love boat promises something for everyone.♪
♪Set a course for adventure your mind on a new romance.♪
♪Love won't hurt anymore.♪
♪It's an open smile on a friendly shore♪
♪yes, love,welcome aboard, it's love.♪
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Let me get a shot of you comin' on board.
Oh, c'mon, honey.
Let's go to the cabin.
You can take pictures later.
Oh, wait just a minute.
Oh....
Hi!
I'm Julie McCoy, your cruise director.
Hi, I'm Wendy Bradley, and the man behind you with a
camera is not a spy.
That's my husband, Sam.
Say cheese.
Both: Cheese.
A real shutterbug, huh?
Well, I got him the camera to take on the cruise.
Since then it's been like living on candid camera.
No, ginger, no!
Oh, come on, come on, come on, Teddy.
I'll stay in your cabin.
Who's gonna know?
Ginger, this is as far as you go.
Oh, that's not what you said last night.
Excuse me.
C'mon, ginger, you're gonna have to leave the ship.
You're gonna get me in hot water.
I'd say you're already in it.
Clear up to your neck.
Who's the wet blanket?
Uh, ginger, this is Julie McCoy.
She's an officer.
The most ship-shape officer I've ever served under.
Teddy, you're late.
You're improperly dressed and this is not the crew entrance.
Oh, come on, Julie.
Please, report to your duty at once.
You're not pulling rank on me, are ya?
If she isn't, I am!
Sir, this is not what it looks like.
I was just doing some advance public relations work.
Miss ladue here happens to have some very important contacts
---- yeah.
Come on, honey, uh -- miss ladue.Bye ,sir.
Okay,I'll see you next weekend.
And remember me in your gentle dreams.
Oh, Teddy, those are gonna be some dreams.
If we weren't sailing in a few minutes, I'd find a
replacement for that man.
Oh, he's not a bad sort, captain.
And he's very popular with the passengers.
Well, I'm sure that miss ladue would be popular with
the passengers too, but I don't have her on salary.
Oh, he is a terrific character.
The captain?
No, the -- reprobate and his girlfriend.
Oh, Teddy.
You think I could -- get a picture of him?
I'm sure you'll have plenty of opportunities --
he-he's your cabin steward.
Well, I'm sure you'll enjoy yourselves very much.
Enjoy the next seven days.
Well -- we made it!
I told you.
I know!
Hi.
We're mr.And Mrs. Allison.
Oh, say that again.
The 'mr.And Mrs.' part.
We just got married.
Really?
Well, I thought you just fell off the top of a wedding cake.
We almost didn't get here in time.
The minister was late.
Well, have a great honeymoon.
And I hope we'll be seeing a lot of you.
I hope you won't.
Good morning.
Good morning!
This is our purser's lobby.
I'm a purser; I'll show it to you.
Honey, we have to talk finances.
Now, how much was the cab?
Bill: Four dollars on the meter...
And a dollar tip.
Doreen: A dollar tip.
A dollar tip?!
Bill, you know we have to watch every penny.
Uh -- so your mother gets two less postcards.
Doreen: That won't work.
Why?
I only had her down for one.
Doreen -- don't worry.
The way you look, with the sun in your hair, we're not gonna
have time to write home.
Hey, you guys -- look at this.
The Martin stockwoods have cancelled their cruise.
The promenade suite is going empty.
All that luxury, completely paid for.
What a waste.
Well, if it'll make you feel any better, I'll stay there
but remember, I offered to make the sacrifice.
Excuse me.
Hi.
Hi.
We're Mr. and Mrs. Bill Edwards.
Hello.
Welcome aboard.
Let's see -- Edwards, Edwards....
Yes, you're on the aloha deck, cabin one-oh-one.
Uh-oh -- the boom boom room.
Sounds like we'll be sleeping in the bar.
No, actually, it's just a rather small cabin.
Right above the engines.
And all night long it goes, 'boom'?
No.
Boom-boom!
That's okay.
We've been saving for this vacation for a long time, and
the boom-boom room will be fine.
You know -- I just had a strange idea.
Do you ever have any other kind?
The promenade suite.
No, we couldn't!
No way.
Nah....
No.
Why not?
Oh, what a fantastic room!
Yeah, it's got a bed ----
kisses any different now that we're married?
Uh huh.
Better.
George: If you think that's better....
What's wrong?
What's the matter?
My back!
A muscle spasm.
Same thing I got last year skiing--- don't touch me!
The doctor told me what to do.
What?!
Sleep on a board for a couple'a days and scream into my
pillow.
This is what's commonly
referred to as 'going first cabin.'
oh, bill!
It's beautiful!
But we couldn't.
Well, now, this is your deluxe sitting room.
And this is your basic champagne on ice.
Compliments of the line.
And here is your view of your pacific ocean, the best in
the house.
We couldn't.
And these are your luxury sleeping quarters -- complete
with the largest bed on board.
We'll take it.
But honey....
Doreen, it's no big deal.
Do you want all this to go to waste?
Oh, no!
But it doesn't seem right.
Oh, the line'll get their money and the stockwoods aren't
gonna show up.
Sure, the only person that could possibly care one way or the
other is the captain, and he's not gonna know.
Mr.and mrs.Stockwood, I presume.
Uh -- captain stubing.
I wanted to make a point of welcoming you, but I
see that my crew has beaten me to it.
In any case, would you dine with me tomorrow?
Uh -- we -- well.....
Oh now, I will not take 'uh-we-well' for an answer.
Now, I read the article in fortune magazine about your
brilliant advertising career, and well, I wanna talk more
about it in person--- I hope that the promenade suite will be
up to your usual standards.
Well, I guess it's back to the boom-boom room for us.
If mr.And Mrs.
Stockwood are not at the captain's table tomorrow night,
it's off to the brig for us.
I forgot my cap.
Excuse me, mr.Stockwood.
Please.
Call me Martin.
Martin.
Honey, come here.
Look at these shots of the party.
Oh, won't you at least let me finish unpacking?
Hey!
I got this one in focus.
Look, you can read the words on the cake.
'Bon voyage'.
Hey look, there's you and your mom.
Oh, that's a good one of mom.
It's pretty good of you, too.
Uh-huh!
There's my masterpiece.
Oh, your aunt Lilly and your dad doing the Charleston.
That's terrific.
What's the matter, hon?
Nothin'.
Oh, every once in a while I wish I knew my father.
I know.
Look, you finish unpacking and we'll go check out the ship,
huh?
I know what you're really after, Sam Bradley.
What?
You want a picture of me unpacking.
Excuse me.
Compliments of the ship.
Oh, isn't that nice?
Yes, welcome aboard.
I also have a little gift from me to you.
Caviar!
I don't know what to say.
We'll certainly mention your kindness to the captain.
I wouldn't do that if I were you.
You see, it's from the captain's private stock.
The very best.
'L.s.b.' --- 'less said the better'.
If you know what I mean.
Why don't we let this chill a while -- and you two go
exploring the ship and I'll finish your unpacking.
Oh, no......
Oh no, no, trouble at all.
Just remember to tip me handsomely at the end of the
trip, that's all.
Go ahead.
Well....all right.
See you later, Teddy.
You will.
Almost forgot this--- now look, honey.
First I wanna get a shot a you.....
Sam!
Oh my god, no!
Oh my god, no!
Thanks, doc.
I think this is gonna fit.
Great.
'Cause it's either this or a formal surgical gown.
Yes, I think that's it.
Oh, it's gonna look super with your hair.
Oh gee, thanks for lending it to me, Julie.
You know, I haven't had a gown since the senior prom.
I lost that one on the way home.
It fell out of bill's Van.
Oh.
You're gonna look incredible.
Oh, it's all so exciting.
Even if I do feel like a criminal.
Hey, we came on this cruise for adventure.
Honey, what are you gonna say when the captain wants
to talk advertising?
I mean, this Martin stockwood is some kind of a boy wonder on
Madison Avenue.
I'm going to say -- I'm on vacation.
I'd rather not talk shop.
Just talk about anything.
Talk about your hobby.
See, if I talk about my hobby, it'll make Doreen blush.
I'll see you guys in a couple of hours in the dining room.
That'll give you an hour to get dressed -- and an hour for
your hobby.
Oh, now I'm blushing.
Isaac.
Come on, give me a drink, huh?
Are you crazy?
Aren't you on duty?
Anything that's handy and make it a triple.
You can't drink on duty.
You're gonna get yourself fired.
Teddy: Maybe.
But in the meantime I'm gonna get myself drunk.
Okay, Teddy, what is it?
You see that girl sitting over there?
Yeah.
Isaac, she's my daughter.
No kidding?
You gonna introduce me?
Teddy: Introduce you?
I just met her myself.
I cut out on her and her mother
when Wendy was only eight months old.
I wouldn't a recognized her, except I saw this picture of her
with my wife.
And Wendy didn't know you?
You can bet there's no picture of me sitting on her
mother's mantel.
You gonna tell her?
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Well, I know what you oughta do.
What?
Have a drink.
Isaac, you're a gentlemen.
Salute.
Mr.anderson.
Sir.
After our recent conversation the last place i'd
expect to find you is in the bar.
I was just thinking of the passengers, sir.
I mean, the glass was filled too high.
I didn't wanna -- spill any goin' down the passageway.
Your excuses are going downhill, Teddy.
This is your last warning.
Hey, Teddy, what's happening?
Too much.
Good evening.
Good evening.
I hope you're enjoying your dinner.
We have one of the finest chefs afloat.
It's delicious.
Sometimes I find it too delicious.
Well, I hope you have a pleasant evening.
Thank you.
Mr.beatty, why don't you sit there?
Mr.louden, you can sit here.
And mrs.Louden, why don't you sit there beside
mr.stockwood when they arrive.
Louden: Did-did you say "stockwood"?
Not Martin stockwood?
Oh, yes.
I thought you might enjoy having dinner together.
After all, you're both in advertising.
Well, we've never met.
But I know his reputation.
Stockwood is a vulture!
How did he find out that your client beatty's here with you?
With a twelve million dollar soap account at stake,
word gets around.
Now don't worry, I'll handle it.
Get nasty.
Hit low.
If stockwood is here to steal your biggest account, he
deserves a knee in the gut.
Well, here they are now!
Mr.and mrs.Martin stockwood.
What a wonderful, wonderful surprise.
Stockwood, I'm Fred beatty.
I'm in the soap business.
You are the soap business, Mr. beatty.
How do you do?
Captain: Yes, well now, this is going to be an interesting
evening.
Mr. Louden here is also in advertising.
What a wonderful, wonderful surprise.
Well now, shall we?
Mr. and Mrs.
Stockwood, right over there please......
There's no need to be diplomatic, stockwood.
Louden here handled my last advertisement campaign -- that
was a total flop.
Actually, mr.Beatty, we all learned a great deal from it.
We learned it was a flop.
These boys play rough.
If you have any suggestions, lay 'em on the table.
Not tonight.
I'm on vacation.
So am I.
There's no better time than a vacation to talk business.
Oh, I can understand Mr.
Stockwood's position.
He doesn't wanna just spiel something off the top of his
head and look ridiculous.
He couldn't look anymore ridiculous than that last
campaign your husband sold me.
This really is a jungle.
Go ahead.
Spiel!
Go ahead.
No, really.
I came here to get away from business.
Unless, of course, somebody would like to talk about my --
hobby.
Martin!
If you'll excuse us.
Captain, if you'd like to join us later for a nightcap....
Why, thank you.
I'd enjoy that.
Mrs.stockwood.
Captain.
Goodnight.
Goodnight.
Goodnight.
Honey, what'd you go and do that for?
I'm beginning to enjoy this.
You got anything to read?
Do you have anything to read?
Well, there are three books in the cabin.
You can have your pick on one condition.
What's that?
That you give me my going away kiss and my coming back
kiss right now.
Lady, you got a deal.
Mrs.bradley?
Would you care for an iced tea?
Thank you, Teddy.
You know, I can't tell who's more radiant.
You or the sun.
You are a charmer.
Yes, I am.
Well, Mrs.
Bradley -- you enjoying the cruise?
I love it.
Now I can understand why my father went to sea.
Oh.
Don't you have something to do?
Oh.....
So -- your father was a seaman?
Yes.
Although, I hardly knew him.
He died when I was a baby.
Shipwrecked off cape hatteras.
Well, I'm sorry.
I can imagine just what he was like though.
Tall, handsome, brave -- and a wonderful captain.
Captain: Oh, he was a captain, was he?
Yes, captain Edward r. Anderson.
He went down with the ship.
I wish I knew more about him, but all I know is the name of
the ship.
The "Caroline t".
Well, I can lend you berman's encyclopedia of
American shipwrecks if you'd care to do some sleuthing.
I'd love it!
Good!
Now, let's see.
I have an engagement for this evening.
What about tomorrow night?
I'm usually in my quarters about ten.
I'll be there.
Thank you, captain.
I'll see you then.
Hello, Isaac.
Hey, look who's here!
How's the back?
Hey, that doctor -- bricker -- he's a miracle worker.
He gave me some kind of a karate chop and two aspirins and now
look.it's perfect.
Have you seen my wife?
Yes.
I think she's right over there taking a nap.
Oh yeah,
I don't want to wake her up yet; She's still asleep.
She was up all night playing nursemaid.
When she wakes up, tell her i'm waiting for her in the cabin,
all right?
The champagne is on ice.
You got it.
Everett, I'm telling you, you have to watch out for
that Martin stockwood.
He's trying to steal your account.
Yeah, he's young, but sneaky.
The old, hard-to-get, dangle the bait routine.
Louden -- you know, I like that fellow, stockwood.
His mouth isn't always racing with his brain in neutral.
That's a refreshing attitude in your business, Everett.
Very refreshing.
Louden: Yes -- Mr.
Beatty.
Everything all right, mrs.Stockwood?
Doreen?
Oh, hi!
Forgot my name there for a minute.
How are you and -- 'Martin' getting along?
Just great.
He's loving every minute of this.
Do you know last night he invited the captain by for a
drink.
Oh really?
Hey, if you're gonna be an executive, you gotta go all
the way.
Yeah, well, there's a very fine line between going
'all the way' and going just 'a little too far'.
There you are, stockwood.
Doc, I'm worried.
I think bill's in a little over his head.
Well, why tell me about it?
You and gopher are the ones who put him up to it.
Mrs. Stockwood.
Hello.
I wanna pick your brain.
Oh.
I'm sorry, louden.
That's gonna leave an awful stain on your seersucker.
You can get that out easily.
Ever hear of 'new spaceage miracle banish'?
Are you kidding?
That's my new product.
And you're right.
It really works.
I could never figure out why you gave it that name.
Why didn't you call it something simple that says what the
product does.
I mean, you rub it in and the spots are gone.
Why didn't you call it, 'spots gone'?
'Spots gone.' I like it.
I love it.
Can I use it?
Be my guest.
Doc!
He did it!
Bill really pulled it off!
Well, of course.
I never doubted it for a minute.
I love you.
I love you, too.
I'm never going to get to sleep tonight.
I know.
Here ---
Let me put some more cream on your sunburn.
I always said you were too hot to handle.
Intercom: Purser Smith --
report to your cabin.
You left your shower running.
Hop to it.
He said hop to it.
May I have this dance?
Oh, I think I'll sit this one out.
Yes.
Wrong partner.
This is the last straw.
You have violated every standard of this ship.
Come to my office.
Now!
Here, drink some more coffee.
Then maybe I can get some sense out of you.
Sorry, sir.
You should be.
Well, what excuse do you have this time?
Yeah, it's a long story, sir.
Aren't they all.
Years ago--years ago, I ran away to sea.
Deserted a wonderful woman and a beautiful baby we brought
into this world.
Alone she raised the child by the -- by the sweat of her brow
and......
Oh, I can hear the violins playing already.
You don't expect me to buy this soap opera, do you?
Come on, captain.
It's the truth.
Believe me, it's the truth!
You may not have believed me before but you can believe me
you can believe me now.
And that child is on this ship now.
Young mrs.Bradley ---
my Wendy.
So you're captain Anderson, master of the "Caroline t".
I've never been a master of anything .
You're not gonna tell her, are ya, sir?
Well, don't you think she'd rather have a live father
than a dead hero?
Not this father.
I'm a disgrace to my ship.
A disgrace to my family.
Disgrace to myself.
( Knock at the door)
Wendy: Captain stubing?
It's Wendy Bradley.
Look, I'll leave the ship.
You don't -- you'll never set eyes on me again, but please
don't -- don't destroy her dream.
Please come in.
Hi.
You said I could do some snoopying about my father.
Yes.
Well, I wanna tell you something -- about your father.
When you mentioned his name I thought it rang a bell.
It turns out that -- I knew your dad.
You knew him?
Yes.
Captain Anderson and I sailed together on the same ship -- as
a matter of fact, Teddy here sailed with him, too.
-- So, you see, you won't have to look him up in that book.
We can tell you all about him firsthand.
Oh, that's wonderful.
I wanna know everything.
Yes.
Uh -- well,please---
well, the first thing is he -- he wasa very nice looking man.
Not too tall, but very well put together.
He had a good sense of humor and -- people loved him.
You're his daughter all right.
You've got his smile.
What else?
Uh yes.
Well now, let's see.....
Well, he was the kind of man that any girl would love to have
as her father.
Uh -- he was a fine sailor.
A good man.
Good man, yes.
A credit to any ship upon which he sailed.
Good in a crisis.
Dependable.
Strong.
Yes, strong.
And -- well, I think that Teddy here can tell you more about
him.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah, he's everything the captain says he was and more.
Much more.
What a guy ----
I can't go on with this, captain.
Wendy--
your father's not dead,
i mean, he was never a captain, he
was never anything more than a -- than a ship's steward.
And he didn't handle that too well.
He's none of the things the captain said he was.
Wendy, he's me.
I'm your father.
You?!
What?...
And in all the years you -- you never even bothered.......
I wish -- I wish you'd stayed dead.
Oh, wait a minute, Wendy....
No!
Wendy, please don't go!
Wendy!
Hello.
Oh, hi.
How's Mrs.
Lobster today?
Oh better, thanks.
Doc bricker took care of my sunburn.
Between George and me we're sure keepin' him busy.
Where is George?
Did he go into Mazatlan?
Uh-huh.
I sent him in for souvenirs of our honeymoon, which so far,
isn't much of anything.
Well, you were smart to stay on board.
Mexico is not known for its shade.
Now you just stay put.
We don't want anything else to happen to you before he gets
here.
How's the sunburn?
All better,
thanks, honey.
They're beautiful.
Oh, you're welcome.
There was a whole field of them waving in the breeze.
You know what I did?
What?
George: Kicked off my shoes and I stretched out in the middle of
them and just daydreamed about us.
How wonderful we are together and how glad I am we're married.
I love you.
Not half as much as I love you.
What's that?
Poison Ivy.
He came up with a name
for mr.Beatty's new product that knocked him out.
Really?
What'd he call it, 'boxing gloves'?
Spots gone.
It's so simple.
Why didn't you think of it?
Look at the way he's dancing with her.
Why don't you ever dance with me that way?
Cause I'm working on another product.
Mouth gone.
Who told him to start naming products?
He wasn't supposed to get in that deep!
Well, he is in that deep.
And we're in there with him.
And if he sinks, we sink.
Don't say that on a ship.
Ah!-- Martin, my boy, that spots gone idea of yours is
the best thing I've heard in a long time.
Just a flash in the pan.
I don't think so.
That's why I've decided to let Martin handle my account.
Uh, handle your -- handle your -- entire account?
Just a minute, Mr. Beatty.
Now, if you just want the name changed, my company's all set up
to handle the whole campaign.
Yeah.
His company is -- well equipped.
No.
I've made up my mind.
You're my man.
Sorry, louden.
What medium should we use to introduce the new name?
I wouldn't recommend medium.
How about rare?
He's got a sense of humor, too.
Answer the question!
Are you gonna buy radio, TV or print?
The man has a right to know how you're gonna spend his money.
Uh.....
Do something.
What?
Create a diversion.
Sing!
Faint!
Take off your clothes!
I can't do that.
All right, don't sing.
What's the comparative cost per thousand?
Should we discard our market research and test the product
again?
Uh....
What do you think of Houston as a test city?
Who's gonna do the packaging?
You know, if you're gonna steal my account, I have a right to
know what you're gonna do with it.
I'm not trying to steal your account.
I'm not Martin stockwood.
What?
And I'm not in advertising.
How's he doing?
I'm bill Edwards.
I work in a supermarket.
I told you not to get involved.
You've got to be kidding.
The suite we're in costs more than I make in six months.
I went along with it because I wanted Doreen, just once, to
have the best of everything -- even if I could never give it to
her again.
Young man, are you telling me that you're an imposter?
No, I'm a glorified checker.
He is not.
He's an assistant manager.
But whatever I am -- I'm sorry.
Have you seen the stockwoods this evening?
Yes, sir, they're out on the bow.
The stern.
Fantail!
Right!
We'll take you there.
Are you sure you know where they are?
Doc, I'm telling you we're in a real jam.
We're?
Julie and I cannot go hustling the captain around this
ship every time he bumps into the 'Martin stockwoods'.
If he finds out the truth, the captain's gonna kill us.
Us?
So what're we gonna do?
Kill him first?
Well, there's really only one thing to do.
I'll just go to him and make a clean breast of the whole
situation.
I'll just explain to him.
Sir, we were overbooked -- through an oversight -- and --
there was a whole cabin that was empty uh -- and under the
circumstances we -- we thought --
works for me.
Well, there's plan b.
And what's that?
You tell him.
Do I look like a plan b?
Look, with the kind of fix you're in, you don't need an
Adam bricker, you need an
f.lee Bailey.
Gopher: Do these work for headaches?
Are you sure you don't
mind if I go into encinada?
No, no.
Why should you have a horrible time just because I've got
poison Ivy?
Poor baby.
Oh, well, don't worry about it.
It's almost gone.
I-I'm gonna have the doctor check it out once more this
afternoon.
I'll be back before you know it.
I'll have the champagne waiting on ice when you get back.
Oh, are we sailing already?
Yes, madam.
Oh good.
I made it back just in time.
Open up, honey, and see what I bought for you.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I must have the wrong cabin.
I thought this was promenade three-forty-two.
Well, it is promenade three-forty-two.
Well, where's George?
There's no George here.
There's just me and the little woman.
What have you done with my husband?
This is our honeymoon!
Young woman, if you don't leave immediately, I'm going to
call captain Norton.
Norton?
The captain's name is stubing.
Captain Norton is captain of the sun Princess.
The 'sun' Princess?
Oh no!
I'm on the wrong ship!
So the porcupine says to the stewardess.....
Ah, excuse me, doc.
Just put your stewardess in a holding pattern.
Why not?
I've been doin' it all my life.
Yeoman purser Smith.
What?
Oh no.
Oh no--- oh no-- bye.
Let me guess.
Her husband, the weightlifter, found out about you two.
Mrs.allison,
she got on the wrong ship.
Oh no!
Doc, how am I gonna break the news to that guy?
Well, as the porcupine said to the stewardess ,
very carefully.
Thanks a lot.Doc!
Mr. Allison.
Hi, this is gopher.
Your assistant purser.
Yeah.
Sir, I've got a message about your wife.
Well, you know that old joke about the good news and the bad
news?
Well, do you know the one about the porcupine and the stew.....
Certainly, I'm coming to that.
Uh -- well, you see, the good news is that your wife is okay.
And the bad news -- is that she's not here.
But the good news is that she got on the ship.
But the bad news is that she got on the wrong ship.
No, no.
No, sir.
No.
The good news is that she got off the wrong ship before it
sailed and took a plane to los Angeles and the bad news is that
-- hey, no bad news.
Isn't that great?
Mr.allison?
Sir, don't.
Please.
Sir?
I can't bear to hear a grown man cry.
I'm sorry, guys.
I guess I really made a mess of things.
I don't know why you're apologizing.
I'm the one who got you into this.
No, I'm the one who should apologize.
I should've insisted we keep our own cabin.
Oh no, it was my fault.
It was my idea in the first place.
All together now!
All: I'm sorry!
Hey, guys, I woulda joined in, but I hate to take sides in
these things.
But I am sorry.
I guess I got a little drunk with power.
It's funny, you know, when they think you're a wheel, they hang
on your every word.
You're still a wheel to me, honey
Mr. Beatty!
Mr.beatty, allow me to apologize again.
Sir, allow all of us to apologize.
Let's not go into that again.
Son, never apologize for sound thinking.
Mr.beatty liked your style, and you know what?
I do, too.
You're in that supermarket every day, watching
people, listening to them.
We sit in our offices and get carried away with our blue sky
theories.
You know, sometimes we need somebody to put us back in
touch
tell him, Everett.
We're prepared to offer you a job in the agency.
You'll only have trainee status, of course, but we feel you'll
only be a trainee for a short while.
You'll be workin' on my account.
How does that sound?
Scary.
Look, I've never studied advertising.
I only know the supermarket---
what do you think, hon?
I think once you make up your mind, you can do anything.
Then -- then it's yes?
Yes.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
I know you're going to enjoy working with my husband.
And we're gonna get to know each other.
No, please don't thank me.
Your happiness is reward enough.
And you guys didn't think I could
pull it off.
Teddy wants to talk to you.
Sam, for the last time, I don't wanna talk to him.
I spent most of the afternoon with him.
He made a big mistake, but I think he paid for it.
C'mon, honey, he and your mom could never have made a go of
it, but as for how he feels about you --
you're his child.
At least give him a chance to explain.
How can he explain twenty-six years of not caring?
I can't...
God knows I did care.
I do care.
But what'd I have to offer ya?
I've never been long on responsibility.
I can't keep a dollar in my pocket.
I drink too much and I've never told the truth when a lie would
do.
The truth is, I woulda made your life miserable.
No.
I know it doesn't do any good to say I'm sorry.
And -- I don't expect you to forgive me.
But I want you to know that I realize now that -- I've cheated
myself twenty-six of the best years a man could have---
twenty-six years of knowing you.
Don't go.
Well, mr.Allison, I hope you had a -- a -- a.....
We had everything.
Third degree sunburn, poison Ivy, muscle spasm and now two
days' separation.
Well, you're lucky.
It could've been a longer cruise.
That was a joke.
I'm sorry.
George!
George!
Oh, Sally, sweetheart!
I missed you so much.
Me, too.
Oh, George, I'm sorry.
I was.....
Oh, it's all right.
It's all right.
Come on, mrs.Allison.
Let's go have our honeymoon at home.
Now their cab'll probably have a flat tire.
That oughta give you time to get organized.
I don't know how to thank you, mr.Louden.
Nonsense.
As far as I'm concerned, it's a coup for us.
'Spots gone.' I love it.
Well, bye, guys.
Bye.
And thanks.
Bye.
I'm really glad that everything worked out.
Me, too.
Lucky for us, the captain still hasn't a clue.
Uh, mr.Edwards, I believe.
I think he has a clue.
Uh, yes -- captain.
I just had a call from a,
Mr. Martin stockwood.
But apparently you 'borrowed' his suite.
Uh, yes, sir.
You Madison Avenue types will go to any lengths to
land an account, won't you?
It is absolutely amazing.
It really is a jungle out there, isn't it?
'Spots gone'.
I'm glad I thought of that.
Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.