Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:11,177 --> 00:00:14,887
Love,
2
00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:18,773
exciting and new.
3
00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:22,772
Come aboard,
4
00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:27,276
we're expecting you.
5
00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:30,910
Love,
6
00:00:30,989 --> 00:00:35,079
life's sweetest reward.
7
00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:38,910
Let it flow,
8
00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:43,377
it floats back to you.
9
00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:46,500
Love boat
10
00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:51,588
soon will be making another run.
11
00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:54,596
The love boat
12
00:00:54,679 --> 00:00:59,309
promises something for everyone.
13
00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:01,102
Set a course for adventure,
14
00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:03,146
your mind on a new romance.
15
00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:11,279
And love,
16
00:01:11,362 --> 00:01:15,452
won't hurt anymore,
17
00:01:15,533 --> 00:01:19,293
it's an open smile,
18
00:01:19,370 --> 00:01:23,630
on a friendly shore.
19
00:01:23,708 --> 00:01:28,458
Yes, love
20
00:01:28,546 --> 00:01:29,956
welcome aboard,
21
00:01:30,048 --> 00:01:32,878
it's love.
22
00:02:17,512 --> 00:02:18,432
What's all this stuff?
23
00:02:18,513 --> 00:02:19,893
Well, maybe Sammy Davis is
coming
24
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:23,393
on board, and he sent his
jewelry on ahead.
25
00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:24,386
All that stuff belongs to
26
00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:25,727
the new chef.
27
00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,442
Well, what happened to the
regular chef?
28
00:02:27,522 --> 00:02:29,232
He's in the hospital.
29
00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:30,855
You think it was something he
ate?
30
00:02:30,942 --> 00:02:32,402
No, he's got appendicitis.
31
00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:33,435
Oh.
32
00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:34,398
Gee, I hope everything comes out
33
00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:35,907
all right.
34
00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,418
Borga!
35
00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:48,460
Borga.
36
00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:51,383
Borga...borga.
37
00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:53,802
Chef borga!
38
00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:56,382
Oh, chef borga; Well,
39
00:02:56,467 --> 00:02:57,427
welcome aboard!
40
00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:59,100
I'm your cruise director, miss
41
00:02:59,178 --> 00:03:00,218
McCoy.
42
00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:04,425
Miss McCoy.
43
00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:06,137
No wonder you're not married.
44
00:03:06,227 --> 00:03:07,437
I beg your pardon?
45
00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,110
Too skinny.
46
00:03:09,188 --> 00:03:11,108
Men want women with something to
47
00:03:11,190 --> 00:03:12,480
hold onto.
48
00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:14,187
But, don't worry,
49
00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:16,317
a little fettuccini,
50
00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:16,994
a little ravioli,
51
00:03:17,071 --> 00:03:19,161
a little poke at the Linguini.
52
00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:20,620
We'll have ten pounds on you
53
00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:21,280
by Mazatlan.
54
00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:23,787
Fifteen by puerto vallarta.
55
00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:27,670
By acapulco you could be the
anchor.
56
00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:29,329
Well, I'm sure, chef,
57
00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:30,747
that you'll just have a very
58
00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:31,785
pleasant cruise here.
59
00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:32,798
We have a beautiful ship, and a
60
00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:33,919
very cooperative crew.
61
00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:36,755
And a jackass for a captain.
62
00:03:36,841 --> 00:03:38,761
What did you say?
63
00:03:38,843 --> 00:03:39,303
He said we have a jackass...
64
00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:40,925
I heard what he said.
65
00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:41,972
Don't tell me I'm stuck with you
66
00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:43,345
for an entire cruise!
67
00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:44,471
You're stuck?!
68
00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:45,517
Hah!
69
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,520
This peasant put ketchup on my
70
00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:50,522
bouillabaisse!
71
00:03:50,605 --> 00:03:53,105
It didn't help.
72
00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:56,651
You have the taste buds of a
goat.
73
00:03:56,736 --> 00:03:58,946
Before we sail, run out
74
00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:00,990
and get me a TV dinner...
75
00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,084
Make that plural, TV dinners!
76
00:04:07,121 --> 00:04:14,551
(Yells something in Italian).
77
00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,339
What did he say?
78
00:04:16,422 --> 00:04:18,342
Well, I only speak a little
Italian,
79
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,094
but I think he said; 'Have a
nice day.'
80
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,443
Hi, welcome aboard...
81
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:32,861
Hello.
82
00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,859
Well, look who's here!
83
00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:36,361
If it isn't mr.Travel himself.
84
00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:38,442
Hello, Jeff, how are you?
85
00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:39,528
Hiya, gorgeous.
86
00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:40,532
Oh, thank you.
87
00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:41,203
What's this?
88
00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,531
Another free travelling junket?
89
00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:44,825
Just in the line of duty,julie.
90
00:04:44,909 --> 00:04:46,039
Boy, I envy you guys.
91
00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,369
Free cruises all the time...
92
00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:51,865
I envy me, too.
93
00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:53,248
It's just a job, gopher.
94
00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:53,924
I'm putting together another
95
00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,092
holiday package for one of the
96
00:04:55,169 --> 00:04:56,209
airlines.
97
00:04:56,295 --> 00:04:57,165
Believe me, the thrill wore off
98
00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:58,755
a long time ago.
99
00:04:58,840 --> 00:04:59,920
Well, see you guys.
100
00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:02,838
Bye...
101
00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:04,047
Gee, what's with him?
102
00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,757
He used to be such a live wire.
103
00:05:05,847 --> 00:05:06,557
I don't know.
104
00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:08,979
I heard he broke up with his
wife.
105
00:05:09,058 --> 00:05:10,768
Hmmmm.
106
00:05:10,852 --> 00:05:12,402
What do you mean, hmmmm?
107
00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:14,858
Just hmmmm.
108
00:05:14,939 --> 00:05:15,399
Well, was it a 'gee,
109
00:05:15,481 --> 00:05:17,111
that's too bad' hmmmm,
110
00:05:17,191 --> 00:05:18,571
or a 'maybe there's hope for me'
111
00:05:18,651 --> 00:05:20,281
hmmmm, hmmm?
112
00:05:20,361 --> 00:05:21,701
Gopher, get lost.
113
00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:22,739
Get lost?
114
00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:27,622
Hmmmm.
115
00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:29,082
Hmmmm.
116
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,912
I wouldn't miss your column,
117
00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:32,037
neither would my sister.
118
00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:33,423
That's right.
119
00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:34,249
First thing we turn to in the
120
00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,754
morning newspaper, is 'dear
Beverly,'
121
00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:39,456
even before the obituaries.
122
00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:41,587
Oh, that's very nice,
123
00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:42,724
thank you.
124
00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,390
And, your afternoon TV show
125
00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:46,259
is wonderful.
126
00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,596
Thank you.
127
00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:48,390
Thank you very much.
128
00:05:48,473 --> 00:05:50,393
You know, you're even more
129
00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:51,765
beautiful in person.
130
00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:53,601
That's very kind of you.
131
00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:55,146
Nice to meet you, very nice to
132
00:05:55,229 --> 00:05:55,689
meet you.
133
00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:56,482
Oh, I'm sorry, ladies,
134
00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:57,944
but I really must get
mrs.Blanchard
135
00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:58,784
checked into her cabin.
136
00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:01,608
But we have a terrible family
problem.
137
00:06:01,694 --> 00:06:03,824
We have an uncle who refuses to
138
00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:05,445
bathe.
139
00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:06,531
Oh.
140
00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:09,406
Is he with you?
141
00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:10,454
No.
142
00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:13,246
Good.
143
00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:14,291
Ladies, mrs.Blanchard will be
144
00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:16,293
glad to answer all your
questions
145
00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:19,085
in her lecture on Sunday.
146
00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:20,250
There's a new one, ring
147
00:06:20,338 --> 00:06:21,958
around the family.
148
00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:22,968
Purser...
149
00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:24,429
Sir, I'm sorry, Mrs. Blanchard
150
00:06:24,509 --> 00:06:24,879
has been waiting for
151
00:06:24,967 --> 00:06:25,967
her cabin number.
152
00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:27,642
I'm mr.Blanchard.
153
00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:28,970
Oh.
154
00:06:29,055 --> 00:06:29,965
Oh, gosh, I didn't know there
155
00:06:30,056 --> 00:06:30,926
was a mr.Blanchard.
156
00:06:31,015 --> 00:06:32,305
You're not alone.
157
00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:33,981
Come on, darling...
158
00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:34,520
Oh, well, let, now,
159
00:06:34,602 --> 00:06:35,982
let's see...Okay, cabin
160
00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:37,982
three-forty-two, promenade deck.
161
00:06:38,064 --> 00:06:39,154
Oh, thank you very much.
162
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,482
Thank you. You bet.
163
00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,187
Listen, if you need any advice,
164
00:06:43,277 --> 00:06:45,487
i mean, if you have any
problems,
165
00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:47,491
have a wonderful cruise.
166
00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:55,996
Can I help you?
167
00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:57,132
I'm Adam bricker, the ship's
168
00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:57,708
doctor.
169
00:06:57,792 --> 00:06:58,842
Oh, thanks, but I'm fine,
170
00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:00,168
we're both fine.
171
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,173
All we need is a place to lay
172
00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,214
our heads.
173
00:07:02,296 --> 00:07:03,966
Well, I, I wasn't speaking
medically.
174
00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:05,968
But, if you'll give me your
name,
175
00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:07,010
I'll give you your cabin number.
176
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:09,353
Oh, Gail Smith.
177
00:07:09,428 --> 00:07:12,008
Uh, Smith...Gail Smith,
178
00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:13,518
that'll be p-two-oh-six, right
179
00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:14,639
up those stairs.
180
00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:15,805
I hope you and mr.Smith
181
00:07:15,893 --> 00:07:17,193
have a pleasant trip.
182
00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:18,020
Thanks, but there is no
183
00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:20,194
Mr. Smith.
184
00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,523
Well, if you get right down to
it
185
00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:22,147
there are probably thousands
186
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:23,193
of mr.Smiths
187
00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:23,686
but there isn't one
188
00:07:23,776 --> 00:07:25,066
traveling with me.
189
00:07:25,153 --> 00:07:26,403
Then I think all those mr.Smiths
190
00:07:26,487 --> 00:07:28,527
are making a big mistake.
191
00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:31,704
Not in the case of my mr.Smith
192
00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:32,704
I'm afraid it was me who made
193
00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:35,035
the mistake.
194
00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:14,584
Darling, it's going to be fun.
195
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,120
We'll have a lovely vacation.
196
00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:18,794
Yeah, sure.
197
00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:19,753
Oh, now, come on.
198
00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:21,752
Don't be so grouchy.
199
00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:23,754
Look at this lovely suite, and
200
00:08:23,836 --> 00:08:24,876
this beautiful ship.
201
00:08:24,962 --> 00:08:26,422
Come on, let's enjoy it.
202
00:08:26,505 --> 00:08:27,915
I'd enjoy it a lot more if
203
00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:28,797
I was paying for it.
204
00:08:28,883 --> 00:08:30,433
I don't enjoy...Freeloading on
205
00:08:30,509 --> 00:08:32,089
my wife's name.
206
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:33,888
Now, isn't this silly?
207
00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:34,761
Now, why shouldn't we take this
208
00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:36,097
free cruise?
209
00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,312
All I have to do is give a
210
00:08:37,391 --> 00:08:38,431
little lecture.
211
00:08:38,517 --> 00:08:40,437
Because I can afford to pay
212
00:08:40,519 --> 00:08:41,479
for a vacation, take you
213
00:08:41,562 --> 00:08:43,022
someplace where we can be alone,
214
00:08:43,105 --> 00:08:44,645
without all these people around,
215
00:08:44,732 --> 00:08:45,072
and you wouldn't have to do
216
00:08:45,149 --> 00:08:46,149
work, either.
217
00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:47,614
Oh, darling, it isn't work
218
00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:48,953
i love it.
219
00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:55,328
And, I love you.
220
00:08:55,409 --> 00:08:55,789
Well, if you love your
221
00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:57,618
work that much...
222
00:08:57,703 --> 00:09:00,463
'Dear Beverly, I have a big
223
00:09:00,539 --> 00:09:02,579
problem I think you can solve.
224
00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:08,297
I would like to make mad...Mad,
225
00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:09,971
passionate love to my wife.
226
00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:11,299
Signed: Panting on the
227
00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:12,434
Princess.'
228
00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:15,350
oh, 'dear panting: I'd love to
give
229
00:09:15,429 --> 00:09:18,139
your problem my personal
attention
230
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:19,484
but it's very difficult
231
00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:20,518
to make love
232
00:09:20,601 --> 00:09:23,151
while you are typing.'
233
00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:24,189
what typing?
234
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,232
Oh, darling, I'm sorry.
235
00:09:26,315 --> 00:09:27,475
I'd love you to make passionate
236
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,647
love to me, but I still have to
237
00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:32,025
finish that column.
238
00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:33,163
Oh, boy.
239
00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:34,199
Oh.
240
00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:37,162
Oh, that's great.
241
00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:38,953
Darling, it won't take long.
242
00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:39,996
I promise.
243
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:41,709
And, don't make it more
244
00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:43,829
difficult for me by looking so
sexy.
245
00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:44,826
Oh, ho, ho.
246
00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:45,497
I'll tell you what.
247
00:09:45,584 --> 00:09:46,634
Why don't you go up on deck, and
248
00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:48,671
I'll be there in a moment.
249
00:09:48,754 --> 00:09:50,344
Oh, please, darling, don't make
250
00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:53,343
me feel guilty.
251
00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:56,046
Well, it's either a shower
252
00:09:56,137 --> 00:09:58,847
or walk.
253
00:09:58,931 --> 00:10:00,891
I'll walk.
254
00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:09,978
Oh, dear...
255
00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:12,237
"Dear Beverly: My son is a two
256
00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:13,990
hundred fifty pound fullback on
257
00:10:14,071 --> 00:10:15,661
his college football team, but
258
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:17,990
the other day when I came home,
259
00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:20,325
I found him wearing one of my
260
00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:21,371
dresses.
261
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:24,714
What shall I do?"
262
00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:27,750
"Go on a diet".
263
00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:01,743
Oh, thank you, Lance...
264
00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:13,711
May I have the ketchup, please.
265
00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:45,446
I'm certainly glad you
266
00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:45,958
finished that column.
267
00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:48,118
Oh, So am I, darling.
268
00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:50,837
I'm all yours now...
269
00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:52,838
Oh, excuse me, are you waiting
270
00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:53,630
to be seated?
271
00:11:53,712 --> 00:11:55,462
Yes, they had us at a table for
two,
272
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,298
but we wanted a larger table,
273
00:11:57,383 --> 00:12:00,343
so we could meet more people.
274
00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:01,758
Aren't you dear Beverly?
275
00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:04,006
Oh, I, I'm sorry.
276
00:12:04,098 --> 00:12:04,968
Don't worry about it.
277
00:12:05,057 --> 00:12:06,477
It happens all the time.
278
00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,439
Yes, I'm Beverly Blanchard, and
279
00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:10,149
this is my husband, Russ.
280
00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:11,809
And, you know, I really
281
00:12:11,897 --> 00:12:12,937
understand your problem.
282
00:12:13,023 --> 00:12:14,943
It's very important to meet new
283
00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:16,275
people, and sometimes it's
284
00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:17,320
terribly difficult.
285
00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:18,993
Well, if dear Beverly can't help
us,
286
00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:22,781
nobody can.
287
00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,197
Darling, I know this was going
288
00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:26,195
to be our evening,but,
289
00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:27,997
they are such nice people.
290
00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:31,830
Do you mind?
291
00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,207
Sure.
292
00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:35,495
Then it's all settled.
293
00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:39,088
We are your first new people.
294
00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,005
Good.
295
00:12:51,270 --> 00:12:53,190
Now, that's a nice couple.
296
00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:53,982
So, when are you getting
297
00:12:54,064 --> 00:12:55,904
your divorce?
298
00:12:55,983 --> 00:12:59,153
Bum!
299
00:12:59,236 --> 00:12:59,696
You think they're trying
300
00:12:59,778 --> 00:13:04,028
to tell us something?
301
00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:05,366
P.A.:"The late sitting of dinner
302
00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:07,041
is now being served in the coral
303
00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:08,159
dining room.
304
00:13:08,245 --> 00:13:09,825
Bon appetito.
305
00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:11,544
You ready for dinner?
306
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,544
Well, rather hang out in
307
00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:17,376
the moonlight with you.
308
00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:18,263
Jeff, we've known each
309
00:13:18,339 --> 00:13:19,879
other a long time.
310
00:13:19,965 --> 00:13:23,295
How come all of a sudden...?
311
00:13:23,385 --> 00:13:26,215
Well, I guess I've been
312
00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,265
too busy messing up my life.
313
00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,269
First I loused up my marriage,
314
00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:31,101
and, then I was living with
315
00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:34,805
someone for a while, that didn't
work.
316
00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:37,357
Maybe this time I'll get lucky.
317
00:13:49,453 --> 00:13:51,373
What is it, Jeff?
318
00:13:51,455 --> 00:13:53,415
Why do I feel like your heart
319
00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:55,459
isn't in this?
320
00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:58,503
What are you talking about?
321
00:13:58,587 --> 00:13:59,917
You're, you're a fantastic girl,
322
00:14:00,005 --> 00:14:01,255
I've always thought you were
323
00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:04,890
beautiful, and sensitive.
324
00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:07,049
I think you're great.
325
00:14:10,307 --> 00:14:11,597
This isn't gonna work, is it?
326
00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:12,984
Nope.
327
00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,060
Is it your wife?
328
00:14:17,147 --> 00:14:20,647
Yep.
329
00:14:20,734 --> 00:14:22,614
Still hung up on Gail.
330
00:14:30,202 --> 00:14:30,952
Evening, doc.
331
00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:31,746
Hello.
332
00:14:31,829 --> 00:14:32,329
Hi.
333
00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:32,963
Gail, I'd like you to meet
334
00:14:33,038 --> 00:14:34,418
gopher Smith, our assistant
335
00:14:34,498 --> 00:14:35,078
purser.
336
00:14:35,165 --> 00:14:35,745
Hi.
337
00:14:35,833 --> 00:14:36,383
Hey, how about that.
338
00:14:36,458 --> 00:14:37,998
You both have the same name.
339
00:14:38,085 --> 00:14:39,295
Gee, I've been called many
things,
340
00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:41,298
but never Gail.
341
00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:42,760
I've been called many things
342
00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,340
but never gopher.
343
00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:44,925
All right, you both have
344
00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:45,679
the same sense of humor,
345
00:14:45,759 --> 00:14:46,259
terrible.
346
00:14:46,343 --> 00:14:47,513
Hey, look out, doc, lot
347
00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:48,505
more smiths in the world than
348
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:49,636
brickers, you know.
349
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:52,102
And, our numbers are increasing.
350
00:14:52,182 --> 00:14:54,142
Congratulations...
351
00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:55,136
May I join you?
352
00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:55,477
Please do.
353
00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:56,151
Of course.
354
00:14:56,228 --> 00:14:57,188
Thank you.
355
00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:59,111
So...what are you gonna call the
356
00:14:59,189 --> 00:14:59,569
baby?
357
00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:00,688
Oh, I don't know.
358
00:15:00,774 --> 00:15:01,654
I like the old-fashioned names,
359
00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:02,694
like Johnny.
360
00:15:02,776 --> 00:15:04,186
As in Walker.
361
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:05,278
Or Jack.
362
00:15:05,362 --> 00:15:06,662
As in Daniels.
363
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,119
How about Jim?
364
00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:09,738
As in beam!
365
00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:12,155
Nobody'd ever guess he's a
bartender.
366
00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:13,334
Gail Smith, Isaac Washington.
367
00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:14,332
How do you do?
368
00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:15,293
Hi.
369
00:15:15,372 --> 00:15:16,922
Listen, how about the name,
370
00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:18,999
cleofus?
371
00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:21,134
Now, that's a nice name.
372
00:15:21,211 --> 00:15:22,171
Um hm.
373
00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,304
Henry?
374
00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:26,682
I got it.
375
00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:29,139
How about Jeff?
376
00:15:29,219 --> 00:15:31,309
Jeff Smith?
377
00:15:31,388 --> 00:15:32,308
I like it.
378
00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,190
Would you excuse me.
379
00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:39,360
Gail?
380
00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:42,518
Wait a minute...
381
00:15:42,608 --> 00:15:45,318
Gee, wish I'd said Harvey.
382
00:15:45,402 --> 00:15:48,032
As in walbanger.
383
00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:04,592
Can I help?
384
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:05,712
Oh, doc...
385
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:10,388
Hey, hey, it's okay.
386
00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:11,509
I'm sorry.
387
00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:12,885
Being around me is like not
388
00:16:12,971 --> 00:16:14,681
having to take a shower.
389
00:16:14,765 --> 00:16:15,715
It's okay.
390
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:18,478
I'll save on soap.
391
00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,060
What happened in there?
392
00:16:20,145 --> 00:16:23,225
Well...jeff Smith is my
393
00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:25,895
husband's name.
394
00:16:25,984 --> 00:16:27,364
Except, in two weeks from now,
395
00:16:27,444 --> 00:16:28,744
he'll be my ex-husband.
396
00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:29,741
Now, I thought that would make
397
00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:31,742
me very happy, but, a funny
398
00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,204
thing happened on the way to the
399
00:16:33,283 --> 00:16:34,543
divorce...
400
00:16:34,618 --> 00:16:36,038
Found out I'm still in love with
401
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:37,370
him.
402
00:16:37,454 --> 00:16:39,084
How does a man divorce the lady
403
00:16:39,164 --> 00:16:40,834
who's carrying his child?
404
00:16:40,916 --> 00:16:42,916
He doesn't know about it.
405
00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:43,591
You see, he walked out on me
406
00:16:43,669 --> 00:16:45,209
before I found out, and i'm, i'm
407
00:16:45,295 --> 00:16:46,415
not gonna use the baby to try
408
00:16:46,505 --> 00:16:47,795
and get him back.
409
00:16:47,881 --> 00:16:49,931
But, surely, he has the right to
know.
410
00:16:50,008 --> 00:16:52,048
Well, I tried to reach him.
411
00:16:52,136 --> 00:16:53,466
I was gonna sort of sound him
out,
412
00:16:53,554 --> 00:16:56,434
and see if we,
413
00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:57,465
but a woman answered.
414
00:16:57,558 --> 00:17:01,098
He's living with somebody else.
415
00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:01,766
Here.
416
00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:02,814
Try this one.
417
00:17:02,896 --> 00:17:03,976
It's dry.
418
00:17:04,064 --> 00:17:05,484
Oh, doc.
419
00:17:25,210 --> 00:17:28,420
Darling, I'm sorry I neglected
you
420
00:17:28,505 --> 00:17:29,585
but I thought I'd sneak
421
00:17:29,673 --> 00:17:31,763
in a couple of hours on my book.
422
00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:32,302
Your book?
423
00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:32,974
Uh huh.
424
00:17:33,051 --> 00:17:35,181
First the column, now a book?
425
00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:35,972
What am I doing here?
426
00:17:36,054 --> 00:17:37,644
You could have brought my
picture?
427
00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:40,643
Oh, Russ, don't spoil things.
428
00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:42,266
Do you have any idea how long
429
00:17:42,352 --> 00:17:43,312
it's been since we've been away
430
00:17:43,395 --> 00:17:44,645
on a holiday?
431
00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,690
Yeah, I was seven, you were
four.
432
00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:49,654
Oh, I didn't know it was that
recent.
433
00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,985
Oh, darling, I do love to be
434
00:17:52,070 --> 00:17:52,860
away with you.
435
00:17:52,946 --> 00:17:55,486
Well, I like hanging out with
you, too.
436
00:17:55,574 --> 00:17:57,494
Listen, why don't we start the
437
00:17:57,576 --> 00:17:58,866
cocktail hour early today.
438
00:17:58,952 --> 00:18:00,912
Are you trying to take
439
00:18:00,996 --> 00:18:02,536
advantage of a poor, defenseless
440
00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:04,373
woman?
441
00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:05,538
Exactly.
442
00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:08,296
Good.
443
00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:12,548
I'll be a minute.
444
00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:13,843
Then she said yes, and I
445
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:14,966
oh, sure.
446
00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:15,842
Two rum Collins, please.
447
00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:17,138
You got it, sir.
448
00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:18,181
Excuse me.
449
00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,313
Is that your wife over there?
450
00:18:20,390 --> 00:18:21,140
The dear Beverly?
451
00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:22,175
Yeah.
452
00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:23,807
Oh, yeah?
453
00:18:23,894 --> 00:18:25,404
Hey, man, she is really
454
00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:26,769
something else.
455
00:18:26,855 --> 00:18:28,565
She always has the right answer.
456
00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:29,899
That's right.
457
00:18:29,983 --> 00:18:32,573
And she just gave me the right
answer.
458
00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:36,913
That's way I'm taking a drink to
her.
459
00:18:36,990 --> 00:18:38,450
Hey, how about that,man?
460
00:18:38,534 --> 00:18:39,744
Guy left you a three dollar tip
461
00:18:39,827 --> 00:18:44,367
and forgot to pay for the
drinks.
462
00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:45,866
When a mother-in-law comes to
visit,
463
00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,538
how long should she stay?
464
00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:49,546
Well, it depends whether you're
465
00:18:49,628 --> 00:18:53,048
home or not.
466
00:18:53,131 --> 00:18:53,341
Your drink,
467
00:18:53,423 --> 00:18:54,223
darling?
468
00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:55,929
In a moment, love.
469
00:18:56,009 --> 00:18:57,219
But, why do we always pick on
470
00:18:57,302 --> 00:18:58,352
mother-in-laws?
471
00:18:58,428 --> 00:19:00,008
Why don't we pick on
father-in-laws,
472
00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:01,347
or for that matter,
473
00:19:01,431 --> 00:19:04,391
why don't we pick on ourselves?
474
00:19:04,476 --> 00:19:06,976
After all, none of us are
perfect.
475
00:19:07,062 --> 00:19:09,152
Well, almost none of us.
476
00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:21,241
You have a very popular wife.
477
00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:22,406
Oh...
478
00:19:25,664 --> 00:19:26,924
Hey, how would you like the
479
00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,579
specialty of the house?
480
00:19:28,667 --> 00:19:30,037
Supervised and given the careful
481
00:19:30,127 --> 00:19:31,707
attention of Russ Blanchard
himself.
482
00:19:31,795 --> 00:19:33,255
Well, you just made me an offer,
483
00:19:33,338 --> 00:19:34,718
I can't refuse.
484
00:19:34,798 --> 00:19:36,298
Good.
485
00:19:41,638 --> 00:19:45,138
Now, that's a nice couple.
486
00:19:45,225 --> 00:19:46,975
That's dear Beverly's husband.
487
00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:18,627
What are you doing?
488
00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:20,297
You like ketchup?
489
00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:21,345
Swim for it.
490
00:20:21,428 --> 00:20:22,798
Get back to the kitchen,
491
00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:23,638
and take this ketchup with you.
492
00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:25,472
I'd rather die.
493
00:20:25,557 --> 00:20:28,187
Don't tempt me.
494
00:20:28,268 --> 00:20:29,188
I don't understand.
495
00:20:29,269 --> 00:20:30,599
I've never had problems like
496
00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:32,147
this with any other chef.
497
00:20:32,230 --> 00:20:33,610
I'm not any other chef.
498
00:20:33,690 --> 00:20:36,190
I am numero uno...
499
00:20:36,276 --> 00:20:37,526
It's not easy creating
500
00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:38,861
masterpieces for six hundred
501
00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:39,986
people.
502
00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:42,032
How would you know?
503
00:20:42,115 --> 00:20:43,655
Look who's talking.
504
00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:44,792
Christopher Columbus!
505
00:20:44,868 --> 00:20:46,868
He aims his ship to Mexico, and
506
00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:49,504
then he goes dancing for a week.
507
00:20:49,581 --> 00:20:51,501
Commanding a ship is a tad more
508
00:20:51,583 --> 00:20:53,673
complicated than scrambling
eggs.
509
00:20:53,752 --> 00:20:55,672
Scrambling eggs, hah?
510
00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:57,174
You happen to be talking to a
511
00:20:57,255 --> 00:20:58,665
man who performs miracles with
512
00:20:58,757 --> 00:20:59,967
eggs!
513
00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:03,470
Mostly, you lay them.
514
00:21:03,553 --> 00:21:05,973
(Yells in Italian).
515
00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:16,069
Italian semaphore.
516
00:21:27,285 --> 00:21:28,695
Alvin,
517
00:21:28,787 --> 00:21:30,457
take this below deck, please.
518
00:21:50,642 --> 00:21:52,642
Two bars and a lemon.
519
00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:53,648
It's the story of my life.
520
00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:56,019
I was born to lose.
521
00:21:56,106 --> 00:21:58,026
Jeff, why are you putting
522
00:21:58,108 --> 00:21:59,398
yourself through all this?
523
00:21:59,484 --> 00:22:00,904
If you love your wife so much,
524
00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:02,196
why don't you try to get back
525
00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:04,569
together with her?
526
00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:06,196
I blew it, Julie.
527
00:22:06,283 --> 00:22:07,833
I burned my Bridges.
528
00:22:07,909 --> 00:22:08,739
I walked out the door, and I
529
00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:09,697
moved in with somebody else.
530
00:22:09,786 --> 00:22:10,446
I know Gail.
531
00:22:10,537 --> 00:22:12,407
She'll never forgive me for
that.
532
00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:13,327
Well, how are you gonna know
533
00:22:13,415 --> 00:22:14,285
that for sure if you don't
534
00:22:14,374 --> 00:22:15,634
get in touch with her?
535
00:22:15,709 --> 00:22:16,749
I'm not.
536
00:22:16,835 --> 00:22:18,495
Aren't you gonna try?
537
00:22:18,587 --> 00:22:22,587
Nope.
538
00:22:22,674 --> 00:22:23,474
Well, you're sure trying
539
00:22:23,550 --> 00:22:24,550
with that machine.
540
00:22:24,634 --> 00:22:25,894
Yeah.
541
00:22:25,969 --> 00:22:35,939
And it keeps coming up
lemons,too.
542
00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:36,771
Do you have a quarter?
543
00:22:36,855 --> 00:22:37,605
I want to play the machine.
544
00:22:37,689 --> 00:22:39,609
Oh, sure.
545
00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:40,731
There you go.
546
00:22:40,817 --> 00:22:42,277
Split the winnings?
547
00:22:42,360 --> 00:22:43,570
Of course.
548
00:22:50,660 --> 00:22:51,120
I won!
549
00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:52,413
Look at that!
550
00:22:52,496 --> 00:22:56,286
It's incredible!
551
00:22:56,375 --> 00:22:57,915
Gail, I thought we were gonna
552
00:22:58,001 --> 00:22:58,461
split the winnings.
553
00:22:58,543 --> 00:23:00,633
Oh, yeah.
554
00:23:00,712 --> 00:23:12,682
Here's your quarter.
555
00:23:12,766 --> 00:23:13,726
Well, you really get
556
00:23:13,809 --> 00:23:14,809
unbelievable letters.
557
00:23:14,893 --> 00:23:17,603
Oh, they usually are from
normal,
558
00:23:17,687 --> 00:23:18,937
everyday people,
559
00:23:19,022 --> 00:23:20,652
you know, with real problems.
560
00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:21,822
There are some exceptions.
561
00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:23,820
Like, this woman wrote that her
562
00:23:23,902 --> 00:23:25,782
husband's secretary only wears a
563
00:23:25,862 --> 00:23:27,782
bra and little panties to the
564
00:23:27,864 --> 00:23:29,784
office, like that he saves money
565
00:23:29,866 --> 00:23:31,946
on the air conditioning.
566
00:23:34,037 --> 00:23:35,657
And what did you advise her?
567
00:23:35,747 --> 00:23:36,407
Well, I told her to tell her
568
00:23:36,498 --> 00:23:40,458
husband to cool it in the
office.
569
00:23:40,544 --> 00:23:41,714
Sorry to be late.
570
00:23:41,795 --> 00:23:43,165
Tell me more.
571
00:23:43,255 --> 00:23:44,335
Well, as the man said,
572
00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:47,013
I got millions of them.
573
00:23:47,092 --> 00:23:48,392
We meet again.
574
00:23:48,468 --> 00:23:50,048
This forty year old spinster
575
00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:51,807
read a book, titled
576
00:23:51,888 --> 00:23:53,468
'sex after seventy', and she
577
00:23:53,557 --> 00:23:55,517
wanted to know if she has to
578
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:58,810
wait until then!
579
00:23:58,895 --> 00:24:00,185
Oh, that's marvelous!
580
00:24:00,272 --> 00:24:02,982
Marvelous!
581
00:24:03,066 --> 00:24:03,976
Well, what would you like to
582
00:24:04,067 --> 00:24:06,357
have for dinner?
583
00:24:06,444 --> 00:24:08,074
Well, let me see.
584
00:24:08,155 --> 00:24:10,405
I think I'll have a steak, very
585
00:24:10,490 --> 00:24:11,530
rare, please.
586
00:24:11,616 --> 00:24:13,866
Oh, and a salad.
587
00:24:13,952 --> 00:24:16,542
Oh, dear, my favorite is
588
00:24:16,621 --> 00:24:18,211
chocolate soufflé, but it isn't
589
00:24:18,290 --> 00:24:19,710
on the menu.
590
00:24:19,791 --> 00:24:21,841
Chocolate soufflé?
591
00:24:21,918 --> 00:24:23,548
Your wish is my command...
592
00:24:23,628 --> 00:24:24,668
Gopher...
593
00:24:24,754 --> 00:24:25,714
Come here, please.
594
00:24:25,797 --> 00:24:26,757
Would you please tell the chef,
595
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:28,430
the captain requests a chocolate
596
00:24:28,508 --> 00:24:29,548
soufflé for dessert.
597
00:24:29,634 --> 00:24:29,894
Yes, sir.
598
00:24:29,968 --> 00:24:30,758
Oh, captain.
599
00:24:30,844 --> 00:24:32,224
I am most impressed.
600
00:24:32,304 --> 00:24:33,564
It was nothing.
601
00:24:33,638 --> 00:24:35,558
Oh, but it is.
602
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:38,060
You're a born leader.
603
00:24:38,143 --> 00:24:38,773
Well...
604
00:24:38,852 --> 00:24:39,562
Oh, come on, captain,
605
00:24:39,644 --> 00:24:40,904
admit it.
606
00:24:40,979 --> 00:24:42,189
You are the kind of a man who
607
00:24:42,272 --> 00:24:43,772
gets what he wants.
608
00:24:43,857 --> 00:24:50,857
Someone has to be boss.
609
00:24:50,947 --> 00:24:55,577
Chef borga says no way.
610
00:24:55,660 --> 00:24:57,200
There, there has been some
611
00:24:57,287 --> 00:24:58,247
misunderstanding.
612
00:24:58,330 --> 00:24:59,540
No, I don't think so,sir.
613
00:24:59,623 --> 00:25:00,253
He used a lot of colorful
614
00:25:00,332 --> 00:25:02,382
Italian adjectives and gestures.
615
00:25:02,459 --> 00:25:03,749
Are you familiar with...
616
00:25:03,835 --> 00:25:05,455
Please excuse me.
617
00:25:05,545 --> 00:25:06,625
Excuse me.
618
00:25:06,713 --> 00:25:07,463
Excuse me.
619
00:25:07,547 --> 00:25:11,257
Excuse me.
620
00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:21,603
Out!
621
00:25:21,686 --> 00:25:22,266
Out!
622
00:25:22,354 --> 00:25:23,234
Out of my kitchen.
623
00:25:23,313 --> 00:25:25,233
Your kitchen is part of my ship,
624
00:25:25,315 --> 00:25:26,895
and I am requesting a
625
00:25:26,983 --> 00:25:28,943
chocolate soufflé for dessert.
626
00:25:29,027 --> 00:25:30,607
Borga: You want requests, go
627
00:25:30,695 --> 00:25:33,945
talk to the bandleader.
628
00:25:34,032 --> 00:25:34,782
I don't have to take this from
629
00:25:34,866 --> 00:25:38,826
a short order cook.
630
00:25:38,912 --> 00:25:41,462
Short order cook?
631
00:25:41,539 --> 00:25:42,579
Borga?
632
00:25:42,666 --> 00:25:43,956
I demand an apology!
633
00:25:44,042 --> 00:25:45,042
Never!
634
00:25:45,126 --> 00:25:46,626
If I don't have an apology
635
00:25:46,711 --> 00:25:48,461
in writing in my hand by
tomorrow,
636
00:25:48,546 --> 00:25:49,666
this is the last dinner
637
00:25:49,756 --> 00:25:50,966
I cook on this ship.
638
00:25:51,049 --> 00:25:53,719
You call this dinner?
639
00:25:53,802 --> 00:25:54,432
Out!
640
00:25:54,511 --> 00:25:55,851
Or I make mince meat out of you.
641
00:25:55,929 --> 00:26:05,109
Where would you steal the
recipe?
642
00:26:05,188 --> 00:26:06,978
If I told you once, I told you
643
00:26:07,065 --> 00:26:07,975
a thousand times,
644
00:26:08,066 --> 00:26:09,646
one tomato on each plate!
645
00:26:09,734 --> 00:26:12,494
What's the matter with you!
646
00:26:12,570 --> 00:26:13,950
My apologies, but the chef
647
00:26:14,030 --> 00:26:15,950
ran out of chocolate.
648
00:26:16,032 --> 00:26:18,492
Oh, well, that's perfectly all
right
649
00:26:18,576 --> 00:26:20,446
i really don't need the extra
calories,
650
00:26:20,537 --> 00:26:21,657
and Russ doesn't like.
651
00:26:21,746 --> 00:26:23,616
Russ?
652
00:26:23,707 --> 00:26:26,167
He left.
653
00:26:26,251 --> 00:26:27,291
He did?
654
00:26:27,377 --> 00:26:28,627
You even said goodbye to him.
655
00:26:28,712 --> 00:26:29,382
Don't you remember?
656
00:26:29,462 --> 00:26:30,512
No.
657
00:26:30,588 --> 00:26:32,508
You know, when I start talking
658
00:26:32,590 --> 00:26:34,510
about my work, I'm in another
659
00:26:34,592 --> 00:26:35,592
planet.
660
00:26:35,677 --> 00:26:37,547
Like the other night in new
York,
661
00:26:37,637 --> 00:26:39,007
I was signing autographs
662
00:26:39,097 --> 00:26:41,137
after my TV show, and my mother
663
00:26:41,224 --> 00:26:42,564
came backstage, and I wrote,
664
00:26:42,642 --> 00:26:46,352
happiness always to, then I
asked her
665
00:26:46,438 --> 00:26:49,858
how do you spell your name?
666
00:26:49,941 --> 00:26:50,861
(Sings) Ain't
667
00:26:50,942 --> 00:26:55,162
misbehavin' all by myself...
668
00:27:05,582 --> 00:27:09,712
Your cheatin' heart will tell on
669
00:27:09,794 --> 00:27:10,964
you...
670
00:27:27,645 --> 00:27:29,475
Now, how about a lectern,
671
00:27:29,564 --> 00:27:30,734
you know, for your notes?
672
00:27:30,815 --> 00:27:32,105
Oh, I never use notes.
673
00:27:32,192 --> 00:27:34,112
It's a crutch.
674
00:27:34,194 --> 00:27:35,244
Right.
675
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:36,280
Well, listen, mrs.Blanchard,
676
00:27:36,363 --> 00:27:36,743
you just leave
677
00:27:36,821 --> 00:27:37,451
everything to me.
678
00:27:37,530 --> 00:27:37,910
I'll have it all set up for you
679
00:27:37,989 --> 00:27:39,319
by this afternoon.
680
00:27:39,407 --> 00:27:40,237
Oh, thank you.
681
00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:41,405
Thank you very much.
682
00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:45,543
You bet.
683
00:27:45,622 --> 00:27:46,372
That was dear Beverly you
684
00:27:46,456 --> 00:27:47,416
were talking to.
685
00:27:47,499 --> 00:27:48,539
Yeah.
686
00:27:48,625 --> 00:27:51,205
I really like her.
687
00:27:51,294 --> 00:27:52,554
Stick around.
688
00:27:52,629 --> 00:27:54,089
She may be available soon.
689
00:27:54,172 --> 00:27:54,922
Oh, what's that supposed
690
00:27:55,006 --> 00:27:56,046
to mean?
691
00:27:56,132 --> 00:28:00,642
Last night, when I was on deck,
692
00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:02,640
I saw her husband, giving
693
00:28:02,722 --> 00:28:04,102
kissing lessons to one of our
694
00:28:04,182 --> 00:28:05,432
lady passengers.
695
00:28:05,517 --> 00:28:06,267
You're kidding.
696
00:28:06,351 --> 00:28:08,941
Um ummm.
697
00:28:09,020 --> 00:28:12,150
And he's a good teacher!
698
00:28:12,232 --> 00:28:13,942
What a rotten creep.
699
00:28:14,025 --> 00:28:15,275
Now, wait a minute.
700
00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:16,440
Wait a minute, gopher, it's her
701
00:28:16,528 --> 00:28:17,778
own fault.
702
00:28:17,862 --> 00:28:18,822
I mean, she's been so busy with
703
00:28:18,905 --> 00:28:20,405
everybody else, she's been
704
00:28:20,490 --> 00:28:22,450
leaving him out in the cold.
705
00:28:22,534 --> 00:28:23,954
Oh, gee, that's a shame.
706
00:28:24,035 --> 00:28:25,115
Maybe I ought to tell her.
707
00:28:25,203 --> 00:28:26,453
Butt out!
708
00:28:26,538 --> 00:28:27,248
I mean, it's none of your
709
00:28:27,330 --> 00:28:28,580
business.
710
00:28:28,665 --> 00:28:29,285
Yeah, but if I don't tell her,
711
00:28:29,374 --> 00:28:32,634
her marriage may go on the
rocks.
712
00:28:32,710 --> 00:28:33,630
But, if I do tell her, her
713
00:28:33,711 --> 00:28:34,841
marriage may go on the rocks.
714
00:28:34,921 --> 00:28:36,301
Maybe I should tell him.
715
00:28:36,381 --> 00:28:38,801
He already knows.
716
00:28:38,883 --> 00:28:41,933
Isaac, I don't know what to do.
717
00:28:42,011 --> 00:28:45,521
Sounds like a problem for
718
00:28:45,598 --> 00:28:47,428
dear Beverly.
719
00:28:47,517 --> 00:28:48,477
Sounds more like dear Beverly's
720
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:50,150
problem.
721
00:29:12,292 --> 00:29:13,332
Want to sit for a minute?
722
00:29:13,418 --> 00:29:14,378
Oh yeah.
723
00:29:17,422 --> 00:29:20,012
Ah.
724
00:29:20,091 --> 00:29:20,881
Beautiful day...
725
00:29:30,935 --> 00:29:31,845
Well, I thought it was a
726
00:29:31,936 --> 00:29:34,606
beautiful day.
727
00:29:34,689 --> 00:29:36,479
What's wrong?
728
00:29:36,566 --> 00:29:39,736
My mind's playing tricks on me.
729
00:29:39,819 --> 00:29:41,529
For a moment, I thought I
smelled
730
00:29:41,613 --> 00:29:42,663
Jeff's pipe tobacco, and
731
00:29:42,739 --> 00:29:45,869
then the baby kicked.
732
00:29:45,950 --> 00:29:47,870
Oh, doc, I'm having a terrible
733
00:29:47,952 --> 00:29:49,872
time.
734
00:29:49,954 --> 00:29:51,714
You see, I want the baby to know
735
00:29:51,789 --> 00:29:54,249
his father, and he would have if
736
00:29:54,334 --> 00:29:56,634
I hadn't been such a damn fool
737
00:29:56,711 --> 00:29:58,381
and pushed Jeff up into the arms
738
00:29:58,463 --> 00:30:00,223
of another woman.
739
00:30:02,509 --> 00:30:04,219
Gail, I don't have any more
740
00:30:04,302 --> 00:30:06,722
dry shoulders.
741
00:30:06,804 --> 00:30:08,184
You're not solving anything by
742
00:30:08,264 --> 00:30:09,064
telling all this to me.
743
00:30:09,140 --> 00:30:11,730
Tell it to him.
744
00:30:11,809 --> 00:30:13,059
You've got a whole jackpot's
745
00:30:13,144 --> 00:30:14,194
worth of quarters.
746
00:30:14,270 --> 00:30:15,400
Now, why don't you put some of
747
00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:20,570
'em into a phone.
748
00:30:20,652 --> 00:30:24,282
Maybe I'll hit the jackpot
again.
749
00:30:24,364 --> 00:30:28,454
Thanks, doc.
750
00:30:28,535 --> 00:30:30,075
Doc?
751
00:30:46,386 --> 00:30:47,966
So, remember, live by the good
752
00:30:48,054 --> 00:30:50,934
old golden rule, and with
753
00:30:51,015 --> 00:30:52,425
the price of gold now a days,
754
00:30:52,517 --> 00:30:53,767
I mean, it's getting more
755
00:30:53,851 --> 00:30:57,441
valuable every day...
756
00:30:57,522 --> 00:30:58,612
Thank you.
757
00:30:58,690 --> 00:31:00,280
Thank you very much...
758
00:31:00,358 --> 00:31:01,318
Oh, excuse me.
759
00:31:01,401 --> 00:31:03,441
May I get something to drink.
760
00:31:03,528 --> 00:31:05,448
I...my tummy's not feeling very
well,
761
00:31:05,530 --> 00:31:06,320
it's something I ate,
762
00:31:06,406 --> 00:31:06,656
i guess.
763
00:31:06,739 --> 00:31:07,449
Certainly.
764
00:31:07,532 --> 00:31:09,282
Thank you.
765
00:31:09,367 --> 00:31:10,867
Any questions?
766
00:31:10,952 --> 00:31:11,952
Yes?
767
00:31:12,036 --> 00:31:13,956
I'm planning to get married when
768
00:31:14,038 --> 00:31:15,368
I graduate next year.
769
00:31:15,456 --> 00:31:16,166
What are some of the most
770
00:31:16,249 --> 00:31:18,209
popular honeymoon places?
771
00:31:18,293 --> 00:31:23,013
Well, with me, it was blowing in
my ear.
772
00:31:23,089 --> 00:31:24,469
But, why don't you ask your
773
00:31:24,549 --> 00:31:25,629
travel agent, I'm sure she has
774
00:31:25,717 --> 00:31:28,967
better suggestions...
775
00:31:29,053 --> 00:31:30,393
Thank you...
776
00:31:34,726 --> 00:31:36,056
Any other questions?...
777
00:31:38,146 --> 00:31:40,106
Yes?
778
00:31:40,189 --> 00:31:41,149
Oh, no.
779
00:31:41,232 --> 00:31:44,152
Never mind.
780
00:31:44,235 --> 00:31:45,275
Yes, gopher?
781
00:31:48,573 --> 00:31:51,163
Well, this isn't about me.
782
00:31:51,242 --> 00:31:55,502
That's what they all say.
783
00:31:55,580 --> 00:31:57,670
Go on.
784
00:31:57,749 --> 00:31:59,999
Well, uh, this, um,
785
00:32:00,084 --> 00:32:01,134
friend of mine.
786
00:32:01,210 --> 00:32:02,550
She's very witty and charming
787
00:32:02,629 --> 00:32:06,799
and...gorgeous,
788
00:32:06,883 --> 00:32:08,343
but she's so wrapped up in her
job,
789
00:32:08,426 --> 00:32:10,086
that she never pays any
attention to her husband,
790
00:32:10,178 --> 00:32:14,178
and now he's beginning to,
791
00:32:14,265 --> 00:32:16,175
wander, and...I,
792
00:32:16,267 --> 00:32:18,517
I don't want to hurt my friend,
793
00:32:18,603 --> 00:32:19,943
but how do I tell her?
794
00:32:20,021 --> 00:32:21,691
Oh, well, don't bother.
795
00:32:21,773 --> 00:32:24,653
If she's so insensitive that she
796
00:32:24,734 --> 00:32:25,904
can't give the time of day to
797
00:32:25,985 --> 00:32:27,895
her husband, then he's right to
798
00:32:27,987 --> 00:32:29,237
give the time of night to
799
00:32:29,322 --> 00:32:30,282
someone else...
800
00:32:38,623 --> 00:32:40,043
Ladies and gentlemen,
801
00:32:40,124 --> 00:32:43,384
i think my time is just about
up.
802
00:32:43,461 --> 00:32:50,551
Thank you very much.
803
00:32:50,635 --> 00:32:52,885
Captain, please write the
apology.
804
00:32:52,970 --> 00:32:54,430
I'm telling you, he means it.
805
00:32:54,514 --> 00:32:55,774
He's gonna go out on strike and
806
00:32:55,848 --> 00:32:56,888
take the whole kitchen staff
807
00:32:56,974 --> 00:32:57,394
with him.
808
00:32:57,475 --> 00:32:58,555
It's absurd!
809
00:32:58,643 --> 00:32:59,693
He's bluffing.
810
00:32:59,769 --> 00:33:00,309
What if he's not?
811
00:33:00,395 --> 00:33:01,895
Miss McCoy, I have commanded
812
00:33:01,979 --> 00:33:02,899
everything from
813
00:33:02,980 --> 00:33:04,270
destroyer to cruise ship.
814
00:33:04,357 --> 00:33:06,937
I have weathered typhoon, enemy
815
00:33:07,026 --> 00:33:07,646
fire.
816
00:33:07,735 --> 00:33:09,065
Believe me, this isn't something
817
00:33:09,153 --> 00:33:18,963
I can't handle.
818
00:33:19,038 --> 00:33:19,868
Hey, Julie, you done with
819
00:33:19,956 --> 00:33:20,916
that salad yet?
820
00:33:20,998 --> 00:33:22,668
Hey, stop worrying about me
821
00:33:22,750 --> 00:33:24,920
and concentrate on that,
822
00:33:25,002 --> 00:33:26,422
inferno you're cooking.
823
00:33:26,504 --> 00:33:27,554
What is that?
824
00:33:27,630 --> 00:33:28,090
What do I know?
825
00:33:28,172 --> 00:33:28,592
I'm only cooking it,
826
00:33:28,673 --> 00:33:30,633
I'm not gonna eat it.
827
00:33:33,970 --> 00:33:35,890
Hey, hey, hey, hey, wait,
828
00:33:35,972 --> 00:33:36,562
wait, wait, keep your potato
829
00:33:36,639 --> 00:33:38,219
peelings out of my soup, man.
830
00:33:38,307 --> 00:33:39,477
Soup?
831
00:33:39,559 --> 00:33:41,599
I thought this was the garbage.
832
00:33:41,686 --> 00:33:42,476
Listen, doc, can you help me
833
00:33:42,562 --> 00:33:43,602
stir the...
834
00:33:43,688 --> 00:33:44,018
Okay.
835
00:33:44,105 --> 00:33:45,605
Just a second...
836
00:33:45,690 --> 00:33:47,610
Okay, boy this soup is really
837
00:33:47,692 --> 00:33:49,782
gonna stick to your ribs.
838
00:33:49,861 --> 00:33:50,611
How are you gonna get it
839
00:33:50,695 --> 00:33:51,605
out of the pot?
840
00:33:51,696 --> 00:33:52,696
Let me taste that,
841
00:33:52,780 --> 00:33:53,490
excuse me, mr.Washington,
842
00:33:53,573 --> 00:33:54,533
thank you...
843
00:33:59,704 --> 00:34:01,254
Needs ketchup.
844
00:34:01,330 --> 00:34:02,250
Hurry up with those potatoes,
845
00:34:02,331 --> 00:34:03,331
mr.smith.
846
00:34:03,416 --> 00:34:04,036
Sir, I've already peeled
847
00:34:04,125 --> 00:34:04,955
half of Idaho, how many more do
848
00:34:05,042 --> 00:34:05,712
you want?
849
00:34:05,793 --> 00:34:07,003
Just peel the other half of
Idaho,
850
00:34:07,086 --> 00:34:08,166
that'll take care of it.
851
00:34:08,254 --> 00:34:08,884
Captain, if anybody needs
852
00:34:08,963 --> 00:34:10,633
anything well done, I've got it.
853
00:34:10,715 --> 00:34:12,335
You can't serve that.
854
00:34:12,425 --> 00:34:13,795
That's burnt to a crisp!
855
00:34:13,885 --> 00:34:15,135
Captain, pork has to be
856
00:34:15,219 --> 00:34:16,639
cooked very, very thoroughly.
857
00:34:16,721 --> 00:34:18,471
That's pork?
858
00:34:18,556 --> 00:34:21,926
It's filet of sole.
859
00:34:22,018 --> 00:34:22,808
Oh, captain, this whole
860
00:34:22,894 --> 00:34:24,984
thing is stupid...
861
00:34:25,062 --> 00:34:27,402
Not that I mind, but, it's not
862
00:34:27,482 --> 00:34:30,492
fair to the passengers.
863
00:34:30,568 --> 00:34:32,488
Please apologize.
864
00:34:32,570 --> 00:34:35,360
Never!
865
00:34:35,448 --> 00:34:36,318
Thank you, miss McCoy,
866
00:34:36,407 --> 00:34:37,867
thank you...
867
00:34:45,208 --> 00:34:53,838
Oh, so...You came to apologize.
868
00:34:53,925 --> 00:34:55,255
Needs ketchup.
869
00:35:01,432 --> 00:35:04,022
Sir, what about your dinner
rolls?
870
00:35:04,101 --> 00:35:05,141
Don't worry.
871
00:35:05,228 --> 00:35:06,728
I'll fry them when I get back.
872
00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:13,026
I'm sorry.
873
00:35:13,110 --> 00:35:15,360
But all you people don't have to
874
00:35:15,446 --> 00:35:16,406
do this if it wasn't for your
875
00:35:16,489 --> 00:35:19,029
stubborn captain.
876
00:35:19,116 --> 00:35:21,696
All I ask for is an apology,
877
00:35:21,786 --> 00:35:23,656
in writing.
878
00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,000
How are you at forgery?
879
00:35:31,087 --> 00:35:32,087
Hey, a piece of cake.
880
00:35:32,171 --> 00:35:33,211
Cake!
881
00:35:33,297 --> 00:35:33,667
What are we gonna do about
882
00:35:33,756 --> 00:35:36,376
dessert?!
883
00:35:44,350 --> 00:35:45,730
Here you are, chef borga,
884
00:35:45,810 --> 00:35:48,860
just what you asked for.
885
00:35:48,938 --> 00:35:53,278
Ah, I knew he would apologize.
886
00:35:53,359 --> 00:35:55,239
Stubborn man that captain, but,
887
00:35:55,319 --> 00:35:57,359
at least he knows when he's been
888
00:35:57,446 --> 00:35:58,156
defeated.
889
00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:00,199
Then you will return to the
kitchen?
890
00:36:00,283 --> 00:36:01,243
Of course.
891
00:36:01,325 --> 00:36:02,575
Oh...
892
00:36:02,660 --> 00:36:08,250
A maestro's place is with the
orchestra,
893
00:36:08,332 --> 00:36:12,922
not in the audience.
894
00:36:13,004 --> 00:36:14,214
My sincere apologies,
895
00:36:14,297 --> 00:36:16,547
Antonio borga.' Didn't I tell ya
896
00:36:16,632 --> 00:36:17,592
he'd break first?
897
00:36:17,675 --> 00:36:19,585
I knew he'd crumble once he
898
00:36:19,677 --> 00:36:20,927
realized we could do his job as
899
00:36:21,012 --> 00:36:23,432
well as he could.
900
00:36:35,693 --> 00:36:37,073
Oh, I'm sorry darling, I didn't
901
00:36:37,153 --> 00:36:37,783
know you were working.
902
00:36:37,862 --> 00:36:38,452
I'll be back later.
903
00:36:38,529 --> 00:36:39,989
Oh, Russ, Russ, come in darling.
904
00:36:40,072 --> 00:36:41,282
This is a special column I want
905
00:36:41,365 --> 00:36:43,775
you to hear.
906
00:36:43,868 --> 00:36:48,158
Uh, sure.
907
00:36:48,247 --> 00:36:50,627
"Dear readers: Instead of you
908
00:36:50,708 --> 00:36:53,288
writing to me today, I am
writing
909
00:36:53,377 --> 00:36:55,087
this letter to you.
910
00:36:55,171 --> 00:36:57,341
You won't be hearing from me for
911
00:36:57,423 --> 00:36:59,473
the next two weeks, because I'll
912
00:36:59,550 --> 00:37:01,140
be going on a vacation with my
913
00:37:01,219 --> 00:37:02,179
husband.
914
00:37:02,261 --> 00:37:03,301
I don't know where he's going to
915
00:37:03,387 --> 00:37:04,807
take me, but I'm sure he'll pick
916
00:37:04,889 --> 00:37:07,139
a spot where the two of us can
917
00:37:07,224 --> 00:37:08,774
be blissfully and marvelously
918
00:37:08,851 --> 00:37:11,481
alone.
919
00:37:11,562 --> 00:37:16,282
You kept me very busy for a long
time,
920
00:37:16,359 --> 00:37:18,239
but if I am too busy to spend
921
00:37:18,319 --> 00:37:20,239
some time with my husband,i,
922
00:37:20,321 --> 00:37:22,531
I might lose him, and nothing
923
00:37:22,615 --> 00:37:24,525
in the world would be worth
924
00:37:24,617 --> 00:37:25,657
that.
925
00:37:25,743 --> 00:37:29,663
Not fame, not fortune, not
926
00:37:29,747 --> 00:37:32,457
anything.
927
00:37:32,541 --> 00:37:39,471
Yours always, mrs.Russell
Blanchard."
928
00:37:46,555 --> 00:37:47,675
Am I too late?
929
00:37:55,773 --> 00:37:58,533
I have a life subscription.
930
00:37:58,609 --> 00:37:59,899
I love you, bev.
931
00:37:59,986 --> 00:38:01,736
That Peggy, she...
932
00:38:01,821 --> 00:38:02,861
Don't confess.
933
00:38:02,947 --> 00:38:03,907
Never confess.
934
00:38:03,990 --> 00:38:05,990
It, it just doesn't solve
anything.
935
00:38:06,075 --> 00:38:07,325
What is that advice?
936
00:38:07,410 --> 00:38:08,370
Oh, I'm not going to give any
937
00:38:08,452 --> 00:38:10,792
advice for the next two weeks.
938
00:38:10,871 --> 00:38:14,671
Why don't you write to dear
Abby.
939
00:38:42,695 --> 00:38:44,605
Well, I'm glad to see everything
940
00:38:44,697 --> 00:38:45,737
is back to normal,
941
00:38:45,823 --> 00:38:46,783
chef borga.
942
00:38:46,866 --> 00:38:48,076
That makes two of us,
943
00:38:48,159 --> 00:38:49,579
captain stubing.
944
00:38:49,660 --> 00:38:51,250
You know, captain, maybe
945
00:38:51,328 --> 00:38:51,908
we should leave.
946
00:38:51,996 --> 00:38:53,366
I'm sure that chef borga has a
947
00:38:53,456 --> 00:38:54,616
lot of work to do, and...
948
00:38:54,707 --> 00:38:56,037
In a minute, in a minute.
949
00:38:56,125 --> 00:38:58,375
Antonio, I know that I am not
950
00:38:58,461 --> 00:39:00,551
the easiest man in the world to
951
00:39:00,629 --> 00:39:01,589
deal with.
952
00:39:01,672 --> 00:39:03,512
That's true.
953
00:39:03,591 --> 00:39:04,881
And I know I pushed you
954
00:39:04,967 --> 00:39:05,927
to your limit.
955
00:39:06,010 --> 00:39:07,470
But, I want you to know that I
956
00:39:07,553 --> 00:39:10,433
think it was very big of you to
957
00:39:10,514 --> 00:39:12,604
apologize.
958
00:39:12,683 --> 00:39:14,943
What?
959
00:39:15,019 --> 00:39:16,269
What did he say?
960
00:39:16,353 --> 00:39:18,273
I didn't apologize to you.
961
00:39:18,355 --> 00:39:19,565
You're the one who backed down.
962
00:39:19,648 --> 00:39:20,688
Me?
963
00:39:30,743 --> 00:39:31,623
I never wrote that.
964
00:39:31,702 --> 00:39:32,792
I never wrote this.
965
00:39:32,870 --> 00:39:33,790
Then who did?
966
00:39:33,871 --> 00:39:37,081
Beats me.
967
00:39:37,166 --> 00:39:38,916
Maybe we'd better go find out.
968
00:39:39,001 --> 00:39:40,251
Yeah.
969
00:39:40,336 --> 00:39:41,916
Captain, you never know, there
970
00:39:42,004 --> 00:39:42,764
might be a forger on board.
971
00:39:47,051 --> 00:39:49,471
So, you never did apologize, eh?
972
00:39:49,553 --> 00:39:50,143
Why should I?
973
00:39:50,221 --> 00:39:51,311
I wasn't at fault.
974
00:39:51,388 --> 00:39:52,468
Then what are you doing
975
00:39:52,556 --> 00:39:52,966
in my kitchen?!
976
00:39:53,057 --> 00:39:55,097
This is my kitchen.
977
00:39:55,184 --> 00:39:56,984
You work for me.
978
00:39:57,061 --> 00:39:58,311
When will you ever get that
979
00:39:58,395 --> 00:40:00,685
through your head?!...
980
00:40:08,030 --> 00:40:11,490
All right...
981
00:40:11,575 --> 00:40:15,655
All right..
982
00:40:15,746 --> 00:40:20,376
I apologize.
983
00:40:20,459 --> 00:40:23,339
Because of my line, because of
984
00:40:23,420 --> 00:40:25,050
my crew, because of my
985
00:40:25,131 --> 00:40:26,511
passengers.
986
00:40:26,590 --> 00:40:29,220
Captain, you are a gentleman.
987
00:40:29,301 --> 00:40:31,181
And because, I happen
988
00:40:31,262 --> 00:40:33,182
to be the only captain afloat
989
00:40:33,264 --> 00:40:43,234
with dishpan hands.
990
00:40:43,315 --> 00:40:48,645
With dishpan hands.
991
00:40:48,737 --> 00:40:49,317
Come on, Gail.
992
00:40:49,405 --> 00:40:50,525
You can't give up just because
993
00:40:50,614 --> 00:40:51,914
of one phone call.
994
00:40:51,991 --> 00:40:53,911
It wasn't just one phone call.
995
00:40:53,993 --> 00:40:55,373
It was a lot of phone calls.
996
00:40:55,452 --> 00:40:56,702
Finally, I called his office,
997
00:40:56,787 --> 00:40:58,787
and they said he'd gone on a
trip.
998
00:40:58,873 --> 00:41:00,213
He's probably with her.
999
00:41:00,291 --> 00:41:01,041
Now, wait a minute.
1000
00:41:01,125 --> 00:41:01,705
Back up.
1001
00:41:01,792 --> 00:41:02,792
Look, your husband is a travel
1002
00:41:02,877 --> 00:41:03,877
agent, right?
1003
00:41:03,961 --> 00:41:05,171
Well, is he or isn't he?
1004
00:41:05,254 --> 00:41:05,804
Yes, he is.
1005
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:07,090
All right, he goes on trips
1006
00:41:07,173 --> 00:41:08,223
all the time.
1007
00:41:08,299 --> 00:41:09,219
And, where is it written that
1008
00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:12,090
he's with anybody?
1009
00:41:12,178 --> 00:41:13,218
You're right.
1010
00:41:13,304 --> 00:41:14,054
You're right.
1011
00:41:14,138 --> 00:41:14,928
Why am I such a pessimist?
1012
00:41:15,014 --> 00:41:16,104
I'm getting to be a real pain in
1013
00:41:16,182 --> 00:41:16,892
the neck to you.
1014
00:41:16,974 --> 00:41:18,234
That's all right, I'm a
physician.
1015
00:41:18,309 --> 00:41:21,439
I can heal myself.
1016
00:41:23,439 --> 00:41:24,729
Very, very confusing.
1017
00:41:24,815 --> 00:41:26,395
But, then the captain finally
1018
00:41:26,483 --> 00:41:27,943
did apologize.
1019
00:41:28,027 --> 00:41:29,317
For real.
1020
00:41:29,403 --> 00:41:32,243
I couldn't believe it.
1021
00:41:32,323 --> 00:41:33,413
Well, anyway, that's why I
1022
00:41:33,490 --> 00:41:35,240
haven't been around much all
day.
1023
00:41:35,326 --> 00:41:35,826
Well, that's okay.
1024
00:41:35,910 --> 00:41:37,910
It gave me time to think.
1025
00:41:37,995 --> 00:41:39,035
You're absolutely right.
1026
00:41:39,121 --> 00:41:41,041
I'm gonna get in touch with
Gail,
1027
00:41:41,123 --> 00:41:41,923
and tell her that I love her.
1028
00:41:41,999 --> 00:41:43,039
Oh!
1029
00:41:43,125 --> 00:41:44,125
Because I do love her, and
1030
00:41:44,210 --> 00:41:46,130
there's nothing I want more than
1031
00:41:46,212 --> 00:41:46,842
to be with her.
1032
00:41:46,921 --> 00:41:49,761
Oh, Jeff, I'm so happy for you!
1033
00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:50,720
So, I told him if he
1034
00:41:50,799 --> 00:41:53,589
really expected me to...
1035
00:41:53,677 --> 00:41:54,887
Oh, my god.
1036
00:41:54,970 --> 00:41:55,720
What is it?
1037
00:41:55,804 --> 00:41:56,934
Why, that's Jeff, and that
1038
00:41:57,014 --> 00:41:58,064
must be her!
1039
00:41:58,140 --> 00:41:59,640
That's Julie McCoy, our
1040
00:41:59,725 --> 00:42:00,805
cruise director.
1041
00:42:00,893 --> 00:42:01,943
Oh.
1042
00:42:02,019 --> 00:42:02,979
Ohhhh!
1043
00:42:03,062 --> 00:42:04,102
Oh, doc...
1044
00:42:04,188 --> 00:42:05,188
What?
1045
00:42:05,272 --> 00:42:07,272
I think the baby's coming!
1046
00:42:07,358 --> 00:42:08,438
Okay, put your arm around
1047
00:42:08,525 --> 00:42:09,485
my neck.
1048
00:42:09,568 --> 00:42:11,108
Everything's gonna be okay.
1049
00:42:11,195 --> 00:42:12,945
Jeff, what's wrong?
1050
00:42:13,030 --> 00:42:14,070
Gail!
1051
00:42:14,156 --> 00:42:15,736
My god, why didn't you tell me?
1052
00:42:15,824 --> 00:42:16,414
Would you excuse us,
1053
00:42:16,492 --> 00:42:16,832
please.
1054
00:42:16,909 --> 00:42:17,909
I'm her husband.
1055
00:42:17,993 --> 00:42:18,703
In just a little while ago
1056
00:42:18,786 --> 00:42:19,286
you're gonna be more than a
husband,
1057
00:42:19,370 --> 00:42:21,580
you're gonna be a father.
1058
00:42:21,664 --> 00:42:22,624
I'm scared.
1059
00:42:22,706 --> 00:42:23,616
Okay, hold on tight.
1060
00:42:23,707 --> 00:42:24,747
I'm gonna pick you up, and carry
1061
00:42:24,833 --> 00:42:25,503
you to my office.
1062
00:42:25,584 --> 00:42:26,794
May I, doctor, please.
1063
00:42:26,877 --> 00:42:27,127
Okay.
1064
00:42:27,211 --> 00:42:28,171
Gently.
1065
00:42:28,254 --> 00:42:29,304
Honey, I love you.
1066
00:42:29,380 --> 00:42:30,010
I don't know what happened to
us,
1067
00:42:30,089 --> 00:42:31,259
but it's not gonna happen again.
1068
00:42:31,340 --> 00:42:32,300
Doc, how can I help?
1069
00:42:32,383 --> 00:42:33,433
Forget it.
1070
00:42:33,509 --> 00:42:34,719
I saw you make a salad.
1071
00:42:34,802 --> 00:42:39,642
Honey...
1072
00:42:39,723 --> 00:42:40,313
Okay.
1073
00:42:40,391 --> 00:42:42,481
Bear down.
1074
00:42:42,559 --> 00:42:43,639
And I never stopped thinking
1075
00:42:43,727 --> 00:42:44,307
about you one minute
1076
00:42:44,395 --> 00:42:47,435
the whole time we were apart.
1077
00:42:47,523 --> 00:42:48,483
Breathe.
1078
00:42:48,565 --> 00:42:49,975
I am.
1079
00:42:50,067 --> 00:42:50,477
Not you.
1080
00:42:50,567 --> 00:42:51,937
Her.
1081
00:42:56,240 --> 00:42:59,370
I was too proud to say I was
wrong.
1082
00:42:59,451 --> 00:43:02,001
But I'm not too proud now.
1083
00:43:02,079 --> 00:43:03,869
Bear down.
1084
00:43:05,916 --> 00:43:08,206
Jeff, I have so much to tell
you,
1085
00:43:08,294 --> 00:43:09,174
but, it's gonna have to...
1086
00:43:09,253 --> 00:43:22,523
Wait.
1087
00:43:22,599 --> 00:43:25,389
Julie, Julie, listen, you sit,
1088
00:43:25,477 --> 00:43:26,517
I'll pace.
1089
00:43:26,603 --> 00:43:28,653
Thanks.
1090
00:43:28,731 --> 00:43:30,691
What is taking so long?!
1091
00:43:30,774 --> 00:43:32,694
Don't ask me, I've never
1092
00:43:32,776 --> 00:43:36,986
had any babies.
1093
00:43:37,072 --> 00:43:37,702
Well, don't ask me, I've never
1094
00:43:37,781 --> 00:43:41,911
had any babies either.
1095
00:43:41,994 --> 00:43:42,494
Has doc ever delivered a
1096
00:43:42,578 --> 00:43:44,368
baby before?
1097
00:43:44,455 --> 00:43:45,655
Listen, listen, I've never
1098
00:43:45,748 --> 00:43:47,328
made soup for six hundred
1099
00:43:47,416 --> 00:43:49,036
people before, but it turned out
1100
00:43:49,126 --> 00:43:51,996
great.
1101
00:43:52,087 --> 00:43:53,757
I'll be the judge of that.
1102
00:43:53,839 --> 00:43:55,549
We have nothing to worry about.
1103
00:43:55,632 --> 00:43:56,222
I'm sure doc is doing a
1104
00:43:56,300 --> 00:43:57,550
wonderful job.
1105
00:43:57,634 --> 00:43:59,604
Oh, I'm sure he is.
1106
00:43:59,678 --> 00:44:01,638
I mean, that's one of the things
1107
00:44:01,722 --> 00:44:02,062
that constantly amazes me about
1108
00:44:02,139 --> 00:44:03,389
doc.
1109
00:44:03,474 --> 00:44:07,734
That he's really a doctor.
1110
00:44:07,811 --> 00:44:08,601
He is, isn't he?
1111
00:44:08,687 --> 00:44:09,727
I mean, it's not a nickname
1112
00:44:09,813 --> 00:44:14,233
just...?
1113
00:44:14,318 --> 00:44:15,278
Well...
1114
00:44:15,361 --> 00:44:18,571
Has my new passenger boarded?
1115
00:44:18,655 --> 00:44:19,735
Not yet, sir.
1116
00:44:26,830 --> 00:44:29,380
Well, what's tak...
1117
00:44:29,458 --> 00:44:32,418
What's taking so long?
1118
00:44:35,672 --> 00:44:36,422
Has the doc delivered a baby
1119
00:44:36,507 --> 00:44:38,127
before?
1120
00:44:42,179 --> 00:44:46,179
He really is a doctor, isn't he?
1121
00:44:51,438 --> 00:44:52,308
Bear down.
1122
00:44:52,398 --> 00:44:54,938
Baby's in a good position.
1123
00:44:55,025 --> 00:44:57,275
What's taking so long?
1124
00:44:57,361 --> 00:45:01,241
Towel...
1125
00:45:01,323 --> 00:45:02,283
Okay, one more time now, and I
1126
00:45:02,366 --> 00:45:04,446
think we've got it...
1127
00:45:04,535 --> 00:45:05,735
Okay, bear down a little
1128
00:45:05,828 --> 00:45:09,498
harder...
1129
00:45:09,581 --> 00:45:12,041
Here we go, this is it...
1130
00:45:15,379 --> 00:45:20,049
Well, hello, mr.Smith!
1131
00:45:22,302 --> 00:45:25,222
Honey, it's a boy!!...
1132
00:45:35,566 --> 00:45:38,776
Oh, doc, tell me the truth.
1133
00:45:38,861 --> 00:45:39,531
Is this the first baby you ever
1134
00:45:39,611 --> 00:45:40,651
delivered?
1135
00:45:40,737 --> 00:45:41,317
The first?
1136
00:45:41,405 --> 00:45:42,775
Come on, I've been delivering
1137
00:45:42,865 --> 00:45:43,815
babies since medical school,
1138
00:45:43,907 --> 00:45:46,987
nineteen sixty-two...
1139
00:45:47,077 --> 00:45:50,577
This is the second.
1140
00:45:58,589 --> 00:46:02,299
He really is a doctor.
1141
00:46:29,411 --> 00:46:30,371
Well, hi.
1142
00:46:30,454 --> 00:46:31,504
Well, hello.
1143
00:46:31,580 --> 00:46:32,870
Don't tell me the whole
1144
00:46:32,956 --> 00:46:34,206
cruise went by, and I never met
1145
00:46:34,291 --> 00:46:35,581
you.
1146
00:46:35,667 --> 00:46:37,707
Well, you're meeting me now.
1147
00:46:37,794 --> 00:46:38,424
Better later than never.
1148
00:46:38,504 --> 00:46:41,884
Uh huh.
1149
00:46:41,965 --> 00:46:43,045
That's the man who was with
1150
00:46:43,133 --> 00:46:44,843
the pregnant lady.
1151
00:46:44,927 --> 00:46:46,847
And that's the lady you was
1152
00:46:46,929 --> 00:46:50,769
with dear Beverly's husband.
1153
00:46:50,849 --> 00:46:52,519
Sex fiend!
1154
00:46:55,771 --> 00:46:56,771
Well, gee, now I am sorry
1155
00:46:56,855 --> 00:46:58,015
I didn't meet you earlier.
1156
00:47:03,320 --> 00:47:05,450
Gopher...gopher,
1157
00:47:05,531 --> 00:47:06,821
thank you.
1158
00:47:06,907 --> 00:47:07,867
Thank you from the bottom of my
1159
00:47:07,950 --> 00:47:08,910
heart.
1160
00:47:08,992 --> 00:47:09,622
Looks like your advice
1161
00:47:09,701 --> 00:47:11,581
is gonna work out for my friend.
1162
00:47:11,662 --> 00:47:12,752
Oh, yes, they're going
1163
00:47:12,829 --> 00:47:14,249
to live happily ever after.
1164
00:47:14,331 --> 00:47:16,041
What's this all about?
1165
00:47:16,124 --> 00:47:18,044
Oh, well, I have these two
hamsters,
1166
00:47:18,126 --> 00:47:19,706
and they just haven't been
getting alone
1167
00:47:19,795 --> 00:47:21,455
as well as they should!
1168
00:47:21,547 --> 00:47:23,297
Thank you.
1169
00:47:23,382 --> 00:47:25,932
There you are, darling.
1170
00:47:26,009 --> 00:47:26,969
You see.
1171
00:47:27,052 --> 00:47:30,642
Bye.
1172
00:47:30,722 --> 00:47:32,312
Hey, you're a great chef,
1173
00:47:32,391 --> 00:47:34,231
and you can sail with me
anytime.
1174
00:47:34,309 --> 00:47:36,229
Oh, (thank you in Italian).
1175
00:47:36,311 --> 00:47:38,561
Thank you, and you...
1176
00:47:38,647 --> 00:47:39,397
Are a fine captain.
1177
00:47:39,481 --> 00:47:39,731
Thank you.
1178
00:47:39,815 --> 00:47:40,265
Thank you.
1179
00:47:40,357 --> 00:47:40,977
I want to tell you that
1180
00:47:41,066 --> 00:47:42,726
chocolate soufflé last night was
1181
00:47:42,818 --> 00:47:44,738
the best I've ever tasted!
1182
00:47:44,820 --> 00:47:46,780
I thought you would like it.
1183
00:47:46,863 --> 00:47:48,703
It's the first time I ever made
1184
00:47:48,782 --> 00:47:49,782
it with ketchup.
1185
00:47:49,866 --> 00:47:51,286
What?
1186
00:47:51,368 --> 00:47:53,078
Just a little joke.
1187
00:47:53,161 --> 00:47:54,411
You see, chef borga has a sense
1188
00:47:54,496 --> 00:47:55,456
of humor, too.
1189
00:47:55,539 --> 00:47:56,579
Yes.
1190
00:47:56,665 --> 00:47:58,455
Arriverdeci...
1191
00:48:00,752 --> 00:48:02,462
Goodbye, merrill.
1192
00:48:02,546 --> 00:48:04,376
Chow, Antonio.
1193
00:48:08,594 --> 00:48:09,934
Isn't he beautiful?
1194
00:48:10,012 --> 00:48:11,642
Jeff, you're not coming home
1195
00:48:11,722 --> 00:48:15,482
because of the baby, are you?
1196
00:48:15,559 --> 00:48:16,479
Yes I am.
1197
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:17,520
What?
1198
00:48:17,603 --> 00:48:19,313
I'm coming home for you,
1199
00:48:19,396 --> 00:48:21,186
for us,
1200
00:48:21,273 --> 00:48:25,493
especially for me.
1201
00:48:25,569 --> 00:48:26,859
I need you, Gail.
1202
00:48:38,915 --> 00:48:39,955
Bye, bye.
1203
00:48:40,042 --> 00:48:41,672
Bye, bye.
1204
00:48:41,752 --> 00:48:46,342
Well, look who's here!
1205
00:48:46,423 --> 00:48:48,133
Time to say good-bye.
1206
00:48:48,216 --> 00:48:49,796
How can I ever thank you, doc?
1207
00:48:49,885 --> 00:48:51,385
Yeah, thanks, doc.
1208
00:48:51,470 --> 00:48:52,140
I'll send you my bill in
1209
00:48:52,220 --> 00:48:53,180
the morning.
1210
00:48:53,263 --> 00:48:55,143
Julie, you're a good friend,
1211
00:48:55,223 --> 00:48:57,393
and a heck of a marriage
counselor.
1212
00:48:57,476 --> 00:48:58,186
Well, I'll send you my
1213
00:48:58,268 --> 00:49:00,808
bill in the morning, too.
1214
00:49:00,896 --> 00:49:01,806
Okay, partner, say goodbye
1215
00:49:01,897 --> 00:49:03,187
to your uncle Isaac.
1216
00:49:03,273 --> 00:49:04,323
Bye, cleofus.
1217
00:49:04,399 --> 00:49:04,979
And your uncle gopher.
1218
00:49:05,067 --> 00:49:06,857
Your uncle Adam, and your aunt
1219
00:49:06,943 --> 00:49:08,653
Julie, and your uncle merrill.
1220
00:49:08,737 --> 00:49:11,567
Uncle merrill, sir.
1221
00:49:11,657 --> 00:49:12,197
We'd better get going.
1222
00:49:12,282 --> 00:49:12,492
We still gotta go through
1223
00:49:12,574 --> 00:49:13,284
customs.
1224
00:49:13,367 --> 00:49:16,117
And do you have something to
declare.
1225
00:49:16,203 --> 00:49:17,203
Bye, bye.
1226
00:49:17,287 --> 00:49:17,697
Bye.
1227
00:49:17,788 --> 00:49:20,828
Bye.
1228
00:49:20,878 --> 00:49:25,428
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
75200
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Akan
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bemba
Bengali
Bihari
Bosnian
Breton
Bulgarian
Cambodian
Catalan
Cebuano
Cherokee
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Faroese
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Guarani
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Kinyarwanda
Kirundi
Kongo
Korean
Krio (Sierra Leone)
Kurdish
Kyrgyz
Laothian
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luganda
Luo
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mauritian Creole
Moldavian
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Montenegrin
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese (Brazil)
Portuguese (Portugal)
Quechua
Romanian
Romansh
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Setswana
Seychellois Creole
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhalese
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Tigrinya
Tonga
Turkish
Turkmen
Ukrainian
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Wolof