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1
00:00:06,267 --> 00:00:09,400
[ Distant screaming ]
2
00:00:09,444 --> 00:00:12,969
Oh! Oh! Ah!
3
00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:14,318
[ Crow cawing ]
4
00:00:14,362 --> 00:00:17,017
It's the crow man!
5
00:00:18,496 --> 00:00:20,020
[ Belches ]
6
00:00:22,152 --> 00:00:23,501
Give it a second.
7
00:00:23,545 --> 00:00:25,503
Maybe he's taking it out
to surrender.
8
00:00:25,547 --> 00:00:27,636
[ Whooshing ]
9
00:00:27,679 --> 00:00:29,420
[ Sword clangs ]
10
00:00:29,464 --> 00:00:34,164
♪
11
00:00:34,208 --> 00:00:35,861
He's anti-heroic.
Run!
12
00:00:35,905 --> 00:00:37,950
[ Feet pattering ]
I don't understand.
13
00:00:37,994 --> 00:00:39,300
He's only one man!
14
00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:41,258
With the power
of a thousand crows.
15
00:00:41,302 --> 00:00:42,433
[ Crows cawing ]
16
00:00:42,477 --> 00:00:43,913
Oh, oh! Ooh!
17
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:47,177
[ Strained ]
Good luck.
18
00:00:48,135 --> 00:00:50,702
Crows and owls
have always been at war,
19
00:00:50,746 --> 00:00:51,921
but why do you care?
20
00:00:51,964 --> 00:00:52,922
What's the point?
21
00:00:52,965 --> 00:00:55,316
Here's two.
22
00:00:55,359 --> 00:00:56,273
[ Grunts ]
23
00:00:56,317 --> 00:00:58,580
[ Cheers and applause ]
24
00:00:58,623 --> 00:01:01,104
Ha-ha! Yeah. Cool.
Morty?
25
00:01:01,148 --> 00:01:02,975
Uh, h-hey, man!
26
00:01:03,019 --> 00:01:04,020
Good to see you!
27
00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,282
[ Crows cawing ]
28
00:01:05,326 --> 00:01:07,197
Y-You're, like,
looking, like,
29
00:01:07,241 --> 00:01:08,764
into crows...still.
30
00:01:08,807 --> 00:01:10,766
Oh, uh, two crows,
you remember Morty.
31
00:01:10,809 --> 00:01:12,376
Morty, two crows.[ Crows caw ]
32
00:01:12,420 --> 00:01:13,812
It's good to see you,
33
00:01:13,856 --> 00:01:15,205
but if you'd given me
more of a heads up --
34
00:01:15,249 --> 00:01:16,946
Well, I-I was just
in the neighborhood.
35
00:01:16,989 --> 00:01:18,382
I-It wasn't like --It's just that
the battle for crows
36
00:01:18,426 --> 00:01:20,341
is kind of never-ending.
37
00:01:20,384 --> 00:01:21,298
Huh. Right.
38
00:01:21,342 --> 00:01:23,126
A little pointless,
then, right?
39
00:01:23,170 --> 00:01:25,128
That came out wrong,
s-sounded judgy.
40
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:27,261
-Crowhorse. Crowhorse.
-Okay.
41
00:01:27,304 --> 00:01:29,393
-Crowhorse. Crowhorse.
-Looks like...
42
00:01:29,437 --> 00:01:32,048
looks like they're
leading you to a thing.
43
00:01:32,092 --> 00:01:33,267
Take care, Morty.
44
00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:34,398
You -- You too!
45
00:01:34,442 --> 00:01:36,183
I-I'm doing good,
by the way.
46
00:01:36,226 --> 00:01:38,402
Oh, my dad was gonna eat that
yogurt you left in the fridge
47
00:01:38,446 --> 00:01:39,142
but I-I told him --
48
00:01:39,186 --> 00:02:06,300
♪
49
00:02:07,214 --> 00:02:09,433
[ Insects chirping ]
50
00:02:09,477 --> 00:02:13,307
♪
51
00:02:13,350 --> 00:02:15,265
[ Rick belches ]
52
00:02:15,309 --> 00:02:18,225
♪
53
00:02:18,268 --> 00:02:19,965
[ Indistinct talking ]
54
00:02:20,009 --> 00:02:22,054
[ Thunder crashes ]
55
00:02:22,098 --> 00:02:24,187
[ Clears throat ]
I'm looking for...
56
00:02:24,231 --> 00:02:26,320
Crow Scare.
57
00:02:26,363 --> 00:02:28,974
The scarecrow?
The evil scarecrow?
58
00:02:29,018 --> 00:02:32,195
Come on. Whoever gives him up
first lives.
59
00:02:32,239 --> 00:02:34,284
Fine, I can kill
an extra asshole.
60
00:02:34,328 --> 00:02:35,416
Helps me get my steps in.
61
00:02:35,459 --> 00:02:37,853
[ Whooshing ]
62
00:02:42,031 --> 00:02:44,425
♪
63
00:02:44,468 --> 00:02:46,470
Ah!
64
00:02:46,514 --> 00:02:48,124
[ Clanging ]
65
00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:49,430
Ahhh!
66
00:02:51,388 --> 00:02:53,434
Rick!
Morty?
67
00:02:53,477 --> 00:02:54,652
Wood?!
68
00:02:54,696 --> 00:02:56,306
Aghhhh!
69
00:02:57,046 --> 00:02:59,135
Uh, Morty, why are you
now like 40?
70
00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:00,571
Th-That's how long
it's been, Rick.
71
00:03:00,615 --> 00:03:03,226
Oh, uh, I guess we can have
a drink together, then.
72
00:03:03,270 --> 00:03:05,489
Do you have
a rum and Coke?
73
00:03:05,533 --> 00:03:06,577
What are you, 20?
74
00:03:06,621 --> 00:03:08,449
[ Chuckling ]
Oh, bless your heart.
75
00:03:08,492 --> 00:03:10,277
Time be goin' by,
don't she?
76
00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:12,017
That's your reaction
to finding out
77
00:03:12,061 --> 00:03:13,497
you wasted
your entire life?
78
00:03:13,541 --> 00:03:14,455
I feel okay.
79
00:03:14,498 --> 00:03:15,891
Well --
well, what about me?!
80
00:03:15,934 --> 00:03:17,936
Whoa.
Excuse us, boys.
81
00:03:17,980 --> 00:03:19,938
You don't wanna
be here for this.[ Crows cawing ]
82
00:03:19,982 --> 00:03:21,244
I thought if I gave you
enough space,
83
00:03:21,288 --> 00:03:23,290
you'd outgrow this...
phase.
84
00:03:23,333 --> 00:03:25,640
Here's your drink, poser.
85
00:03:25,683 --> 00:03:28,120
Dad got sick, you know.
Stage 4.
86
00:03:28,164 --> 00:03:29,513
You would've loved it.
87
00:03:29,557 --> 00:03:31,428
Summer's a nurse --
well, pretty much a nurse.
88
00:03:31,472 --> 00:03:33,517
She -- She married
a junkie.
89
00:03:33,561 --> 00:03:35,476
Rick, come home,
90
00:03:35,519 --> 00:03:36,694
while we still got
a little time.
91
00:03:36,738 --> 00:03:38,261
Morty, what we had
wasn't healthy.
92
00:03:38,305 --> 00:03:40,089
And this is?
93
00:03:40,132 --> 00:03:41,482
Y-You've had a thousand
adventures with these crows.
94
00:03:41,525 --> 00:03:43,092
When are you gonna
kill their big bad?
95
00:03:43,135 --> 00:03:44,702
First off,
the "will they/kill they"
96
00:03:44,746 --> 00:03:46,530
is everything to my guys.
97
00:03:46,574 --> 00:03:48,358
And second, fuck you for trying
to undermine my happiness.
98
00:03:48,402 --> 00:03:50,360
This may be the last time
you ever lay eyes on me!
99
00:03:50,404 --> 00:03:51,970
I hope that's not true,
Morty,
100
00:03:52,014 --> 00:03:53,711
because you look like
s[burps]shit,
101
00:03:53,755 --> 00:03:56,061
and this is not
how I wanna remember you.
102
00:03:56,105 --> 00:04:09,379
♪
103
00:04:09,423 --> 00:04:11,381
Crow Scare: Now that I have
his two crows,
104
00:04:11,425 --> 00:04:14,297
nothing will stop me
from eliminating Crow Rick.
105
00:04:14,341 --> 00:04:15,994
[ Crows cawing ]
Don't defend him to me.
106
00:04:16,038 --> 00:04:17,779
I don't even get
what you see in him.
107
00:04:17,822 --> 00:04:19,302
[ Crows cawing ]
You're right.
108
00:04:19,346 --> 00:04:22,436
We should be enjoying
the time we have together.
109
00:04:22,479 --> 00:04:23,785
Crow Rick!
110
00:04:23,828 --> 00:04:25,308
Oh, I-I know what this
must look like, but --
111
00:04:25,352 --> 00:04:27,528
It looks like
my arch nemesis, Crow Scare,
112
00:04:27,571 --> 00:04:29,791
and my sidekicks
planning adventures together.
113
00:04:29,834 --> 00:04:31,445
You are hardly
the victim here.
114
00:04:31,488 --> 00:04:33,534
I was adventuring
with these two crows
115
00:04:33,577 --> 00:04:35,579
before you ever
came along.
116
00:04:38,365 --> 00:04:40,018
[ Crows cawing ]
117
00:04:40,062 --> 00:04:41,890
What do you mean,
"using me as a rebound?"
118
00:04:41,933 --> 00:04:43,544
[ Cawing ]
119
00:04:43,587 --> 00:04:45,676
You feel like I was using you
as a rebound, too?
120
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:47,896
Well, shit,
this lost all meaning.
121
00:04:47,939 --> 00:04:49,332
I guess it could have
been worse.
122
00:04:49,376 --> 00:04:50,899
At least adventuring
was just a metaphor
123
00:04:50,942 --> 00:04:53,118
for romantic partnership,
so it's not a real break-up.
124
00:04:53,162 --> 00:04:54,598
Speak for yourself.
125
00:04:54,642 --> 00:04:56,992
We immensely enjoy
each other's bodies.
126
00:04:57,035 --> 00:04:58,602
What?!
Ugh! No!
127
00:04:58,646 --> 00:04:59,995
Sounds like the man's
asking for proof.
128
00:05:00,038 --> 00:05:01,692
Let's show him, fellas!
129
00:05:01,736 --> 00:05:03,390
-I-I asked for zero proof!
-Ahh!
130
00:05:03,433 --> 00:05:04,565
Zero proof!
131
00:05:04,608 --> 00:05:06,349
[ Whoosh! ]
132
00:05:08,438 --> 00:05:09,613
[ Metal clanging ]
133
00:05:11,572 --> 00:05:13,225
I'm giving you free will.
134
00:05:13,269 --> 00:05:15,619
Yah!
135
00:05:15,663 --> 00:05:17,447
Crow Horse:
Submit to Crow Horse!
136
00:05:17,491 --> 00:05:19,406
[ People screaming ]
137
00:05:19,449 --> 00:05:21,408
Whoops.
138
00:05:21,451 --> 00:05:22,931
[ Doorbell rings ]
139
00:05:22,974 --> 00:05:25,586
-Rick?
-Wubba lubba dub dub! I'm back, pal!
140
00:05:25,629 --> 00:05:27,283
Jerry:
Morty, who's at the door?
141
00:05:27,327 --> 00:05:28,980
Wait a minute.
I thought you died gruesomely?
142
00:05:29,024 --> 00:05:30,417
W-what the hell's
going on here?
143
00:05:30,460 --> 00:05:31,809
See, uh, the --
the thing is, uh...
144
00:05:31,853 --> 00:05:33,942
Can you please
make Morty 14 again, Dad?
145
00:05:33,985 --> 00:05:35,596
This is ridiculous.
146
00:05:35,639 --> 00:05:37,554
Okay, look, I-I may have used
an aging serum
147
00:05:37,598 --> 00:05:39,730
to kind of emotionally
blackmail you a little.
148
00:05:39,774 --> 00:05:41,384
I kind of figured,
and I totally get it, Morty,
149
00:05:41,428 --> 00:05:43,255
I-I'm done
with the two crows.
150
00:05:43,299 --> 00:05:45,432
Like, they were super clingy
and I'm ready to make this work.
151
00:05:45,475 --> 00:05:46,563
Let's just hit
the reset button.
152
00:05:46,607 --> 00:05:48,565
Well, no, honey,
not a reset, okay?
153
00:05:48,609 --> 00:05:51,307
Tell your grandpa that
you're worthy of his respect
154
00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:53,222
and you want to be treated
differently from now on.
155
00:05:53,265 --> 00:05:54,397
I refuse to do that.
156
00:05:54,441 --> 00:05:55,790
I-I'm desperate
to get back together.
157
00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:57,400
-Just like his old man.
-Don't worry, honey.
158
00:05:57,444 --> 00:05:58,619
That's just Morty's
middle age talking.
159
00:05:58,662 --> 00:06:00,098
He'll be less codependent
once we get
160
00:06:00,142 --> 00:06:01,665
more of his life
in front of him again.
161
00:06:01,709 --> 00:06:02,840
Uh, I'd like him
to stay 40
162
00:06:02,884 --> 00:06:05,539
so he can keep buying
my friends molly.
163
00:06:05,582 --> 00:06:06,627
I'd rather
throw my vote away
164
00:06:06,670 --> 00:06:08,542
than use it to support
a flawed system.
165
00:06:08,585 --> 00:06:10,500
Can we make our first
adventure fixing this?
166
00:06:10,544 --> 00:06:12,284
I keep thinking about
-lawn care. -Okay, buddy.
167
00:06:12,328 --> 00:06:13,677
Who sold you
this shitty aging serum?
168
00:06:13,721 --> 00:06:15,331
-What did he look like?
-Just like you.
169
00:06:15,375 --> 00:06:17,202
I-I got it
-from the Citadel. -Hot damn.
170
00:06:17,246 --> 00:06:19,291
Hittin' the ground running
with a Citadel episode.
171
00:06:19,335 --> 00:06:20,902
See ya later,
masturbators.
172
00:06:21,729 --> 00:06:26,429
[ Muzak playing ]
173
00:06:26,473 --> 00:06:28,692
Hi! I'm Citadel's new mascot,
Andy,
174
00:06:28,736 --> 00:06:29,998
because this place
wouldn't be home
175
00:06:30,041 --> 00:06:32,261
without Ricks "Andy" Mortys.
176
00:06:32,304 --> 00:06:33,523
Dumb.
177
00:06:33,567 --> 00:06:34,655
Ooh, what happened to
this place?
178
00:06:34,698 --> 00:06:36,526
There's
a Morty president now.
179
00:06:36,570 --> 00:06:38,572
Aw, that's cute. They rebuilt.
They made it nicer.
180
00:06:38,615 --> 00:06:39,790
They made it Glendale.
181
00:06:39,834 --> 00:06:41,139
God damn,
you are cantankerous.
182
00:06:41,183 --> 00:06:42,445
Even pooping hurts now.
183
00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:44,665
Yeah, well, this place
is gonna fix you right up.
184
00:06:44,708 --> 00:06:46,580
Okay, so, we've got
a standard Morty
185
00:06:46,623 --> 00:06:48,538
that's been aged to...40?
186
00:06:48,582 --> 00:06:49,713
Can you reverse it?
187
00:06:49,757 --> 00:06:51,323
Well, if you look at it
like a bone,
188
00:06:51,367 --> 00:06:52,934
what we can do is
break his age in two places,
189
00:06:52,977 --> 00:06:55,153
remove the middle, and graft
its ends back together.
190
00:06:55,197 --> 00:06:56,851
Th-that sounds
really violent.
191
00:06:56,894 --> 00:06:58,592
It's not a literal bone,
Morty.
192
00:06:58,635 --> 00:06:59,897
Oh, okay.
193
00:06:59,941 --> 00:07:01,072
Ah, brace yourself,
the process does also
194
00:07:01,116 --> 00:07:02,509
break every bone
in your body.
195
00:07:02,552 --> 00:07:05,033
Wait! Aah! Ooh! Ow!
196
00:07:05,076 --> 00:07:06,991
-I like crayons.
-Girls are gross.
197
00:07:09,385 --> 00:07:12,519
I-I think I feel
like myself again.
198
00:07:12,562 --> 00:07:13,607
Uh, you look
a little weird.
199
00:07:13,650 --> 00:07:15,347
Your skin's all pink
like a baby mouse.
200
00:07:15,391 --> 00:07:16,827
-I-Is that normal?
-Probably.
201
00:07:16,871 --> 00:07:18,568
Uh, sign here
for storage or disposal
202
00:07:18,612 --> 00:07:19,656
of the 26 years
we removed.
203
00:07:19,700 --> 00:07:21,049
Wait, what?
204
00:07:21,092 --> 00:07:22,485
I ain't payin'
to store 26 years.
205
00:07:22,529 --> 00:07:23,486
Well, then you're taking it
with you.
206
00:07:23,530 --> 00:07:25,270
[ Rumbling ]
207
00:07:25,314 --> 00:07:27,272
I'm almost ready
to sell out.
208
00:07:27,316 --> 00:07:28,491
Alright,
what's disposal cost?
209
00:07:28,535 --> 00:07:30,275
[ Rumbling and punching ]
210
00:07:30,319 --> 00:07:32,103
-Oh!
-S-something unfair's happening.
211
00:07:32,147 --> 00:07:33,714
There's no escape.
No escape!
212
00:07:33,757 --> 00:07:35,716
Let me help you!
This is not a good look.
213
00:07:35,759 --> 00:07:36,891
Oh!
[ Gunshot ]
214
00:07:36,934 --> 00:07:38,719
Oh, boy.
Hey! They -- they shot me!
215
00:07:38,762 --> 00:07:40,503
You are seriously hurting
the Citadel experience.
216
00:07:40,547 --> 00:07:41,852
-Listen to me!
-Drop the gun!
217
00:07:41,896 --> 00:07:43,288
Death is coming
for us all,
218
00:07:43,332 --> 00:07:44,681
and the Citadel is
a weapon of mass des--
219
00:07:44,725 --> 00:07:46,378
[ Gunshot ]
220
00:07:46,422 --> 00:07:48,337
Woof. You're about to get
suspended with pay.
221
00:07:48,380 --> 00:07:50,600
Come on, Morty, let's get outta
here before this gets political.
222
00:07:50,644 --> 00:07:53,298
Oh! Was I...
influential?
223
00:07:53,342 --> 00:07:54,996
Yeah, y-you were
influential.
224
00:07:55,039 --> 00:07:57,520
Y-You had like seven --
seven blogs.
225
00:07:57,564 --> 00:07:59,566
Tight. Oh.
226
00:07:59,609 --> 00:08:01,393
Ugh. Too late.
227
00:08:01,437 --> 00:08:02,699
Rick C-137,
228
00:08:02,743 --> 00:08:04,745
President Morty requests
you join him for dinner.
229
00:08:04,788 --> 00:08:06,355
Whoa! S-Seriously?
230
00:08:06,398 --> 00:08:07,530
You know I destroyed
this place.
231
00:08:07,574 --> 00:08:09,314
You've been pardoned
for that, sir.
232
00:08:09,358 --> 00:08:10,968
Rick! Let's have dinner
with the Morty President.
233
00:08:11,012 --> 00:08:12,796
Morty, the idea was to get back
to simple adventures.
234
00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:14,406
The Citadel runs
on canon.
235
00:08:14,450 --> 00:08:16,670
Okay. I guess things really are
just going right back
236
00:08:16,713 --> 00:08:17,714
to how they were.
237
00:08:17,758 --> 00:08:19,455
Fine. I could eat.
238
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:21,544
But the second he reveals
he's evil, we're gone.
239
00:08:21,588 --> 00:08:25,113
[ Ominous music playing ]
240
00:08:25,156 --> 00:08:27,202
I dunno. It tastes...
pretty good.
241
00:08:27,245 --> 00:08:29,030
Okay, let me know
if you start feeling poisony.
242
00:08:29,073 --> 00:08:30,597
Good to have you back,
buddy.
243
00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,555
Mmm!
244
00:08:32,599 --> 00:08:34,731
Sorry I'm late.
Never really ends around here.
245
00:08:34,775 --> 00:08:36,167
Look at this, Morty.
246
00:08:36,211 --> 00:08:37,647
They really did make a you
the president.
247
00:08:37,691 --> 00:08:38,779
And I hate 'em
every day for it.
248
00:08:38,822 --> 00:08:41,042
But wow!
Rick C-137.
249
00:08:41,085 --> 00:08:43,435
Now, that's a guy to move
your schedule around for.
250
00:08:43,479 --> 00:08:45,437
Not -- Not here to blow
the place up again, I hope.
251
00:08:45,481 --> 00:08:47,483
[ Chuckles ]
Ha! Not unless you try to keep me here.
252
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:48,832
Ha-ha, geez.
Wouldn't dream of it.
253
00:08:48,876 --> 00:08:50,399
But it's amazing
you dropped by
254
00:08:50,442 --> 00:08:52,357
because I was eventually
gonna hunt you down.
255
00:08:52,401 --> 00:08:54,142
There's the reveal.
Let's dance.
256
00:08:54,185 --> 00:08:55,796
-Ha! Geez.
-Rick, come on, man.
257
00:08:55,839 --> 00:08:57,928
The guy got elected president
by Ricks and Mortys.
258
00:08:57,972 --> 00:09:00,017
-He's being really nice.
-All politicians are nice.
259
00:09:00,061 --> 00:09:01,628
He's a hot bag of peanuts,
isn't he?
260
00:09:01,671 --> 00:09:03,281
We've been through
a lot.
261
00:09:03,325 --> 00:09:05,240
A-And he does not like --Serialized drama.
262
00:09:05,283 --> 00:09:07,372
Right, no drama.
Keep it episodic.
263
00:09:07,416 --> 00:09:08,678
Ricks never look back.
264
00:09:08,722 --> 00:09:10,462
Waste of a legend
in his case.
265
00:09:10,506 --> 00:09:12,421
You know he practically
-built this place? -Wait, what?
266
00:09:12,464 --> 00:09:14,641
And now you're running
it squeaky clean, right?
267
00:09:14,684 --> 00:09:15,598
That's why you got
deformed Mortys
268
00:09:15,642 --> 00:09:16,817
coming up
through the sewer lines
269
00:09:16,860 --> 00:09:18,688
talking about
hope and change?
270
00:09:18,732 --> 00:09:20,647
-Fair enough.
-Good clapback, Rick.
271
00:09:20,690 --> 00:09:21,778
What's the deal with that,
Mister P?
272
00:09:21,822 --> 00:09:23,432
I got a little project
going on.
273
00:09:23,475 --> 00:09:24,738
Required some
hands-on labor.
274
00:09:24,781 --> 00:09:26,609
It would require less
if you were willing
275
00:09:26,653 --> 00:09:27,784
to tell me how one might
276
00:09:27,828 --> 00:09:29,656
bring down
the Central Finite Curve.
277
00:09:29,699 --> 00:09:31,048
Alright,
time to go, Morty.
278
00:09:31,092 --> 00:09:32,267
I want to know
what he's talking about.
279
00:09:32,310 --> 00:09:33,529
Yeah, you've come
all this way.
280
00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:34,835
Can you give me
10 more seconds?
281
00:09:34,878 --> 00:09:36,706
Literally 10?
Because now it would be 6.
282
00:09:36,750 --> 00:09:37,838
Oh, I'm fine with that.
283
00:09:37,881 --> 00:09:39,491
Make it 2.
284
00:09:39,535 --> 00:09:41,232
One.[ Ding! ]
285
00:09:41,276 --> 00:09:42,843
Like I said, would have been
a big help for you to tell me,
286
00:09:42,886 --> 00:09:44,975
but I should have everything
I need from you now.
287
00:09:45,019 --> 00:09:46,629
Let me just make sure.
288
00:09:46,673 --> 00:09:48,762
You can't scan an entire brain
over appetizers.
289
00:09:48,805 --> 00:09:52,330
Oh, most of yours got scanned
a long time ago.
290
00:09:52,374 --> 00:09:53,636
You probably
don't remember.
291
00:09:53,680 --> 00:09:55,899
Check out season 1,
episode 9, Rick Heads.
292
00:09:55,943 --> 00:09:57,901
Excel[burps]sior!
293
00:09:57,945 --> 00:09:59,686
-Evil Rick.
-We kicked his ass!
294
00:09:59,729 --> 00:10:01,209
"Evil Rick."
I love it.
295
00:10:01,252 --> 00:10:02,689
Smartest man
in the universe,
296
00:10:02,732 --> 00:10:05,343
with an ego so big you can
just grab it like a joystick.
297
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:06,997
[ Whirring ]
Looks complete.
298
00:10:07,041 --> 00:10:08,433
I was afraid I'd have to
kill every Rick
299
00:10:08,477 --> 00:10:09,739
on the Citadel
to get what I needed.
300
00:10:09,783 --> 00:10:11,785
You asshole!
I vouched for you!
301
00:10:11,828 --> 00:10:13,787
He only came here
because I asked him to.
302
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:14,918
I'm sorry, Rick.
303
00:10:14,962 --> 00:10:16,441
That apology and a screwdriver
in my hand
304
00:10:16,485 --> 00:10:17,660
would be worth
a screwdriver.
305
00:10:17,704 --> 00:10:19,314
You sellout Mortys kill me.
306
00:10:19,357 --> 00:10:20,881
I'd hate you more than
the Ricks you worship
307
00:10:20,924 --> 00:10:22,099
if there was any point.
308
00:10:22,143 --> 00:10:23,492
But you can't help it.
309
00:10:23,535 --> 00:10:24,667
You were bred for it.
310
00:10:24,711 --> 00:10:26,147
Wanna see?
311
00:10:26,190 --> 00:10:29,106
[ Whirring ]
312
00:10:29,150 --> 00:10:30,847
You already know Rogue Ricks
used Mortys
313
00:10:30,891 --> 00:10:33,241
to hide themselves
from the Citadel.
314
00:10:33,284 --> 00:10:34,721
But you might not know
it worked so well
315
00:10:34,764 --> 00:10:36,331
that the Citadel
became its own
316
00:10:36,374 --> 00:10:37,811
Morty Market.
317
00:10:37,854 --> 00:10:39,682
And I'm sure you don't know
how far they've gone
318
00:10:39,726 --> 00:10:41,684
to help supply meet demand.
319
00:10:41,728 --> 00:10:43,338
Sure, Ricks could
scour infinity
320
00:10:43,381 --> 00:10:44,861
for naturally occurring
grandsons.
321
00:10:44,905 --> 00:10:46,254
But why bother?
322
00:10:46,297 --> 00:10:47,777
So much work.
323
00:10:47,821 --> 00:10:49,910
Such an admission of need.
324
00:10:49,953 --> 00:10:52,521
There aren't infinite versions
of our grandfather, Morty.
325
00:10:52,564 --> 00:10:55,132
He's an infinite smear
of one shitty old man.
326
00:10:55,176 --> 00:10:56,960
And he's attached to us
infinitely
327
00:10:57,004 --> 00:10:59,746
through his weakness
and our forgiveness.
328
00:10:59,789 --> 00:11:00,964
Oh! Oh!
329
00:11:01,008 --> 00:11:02,574
This is why
we're with him.
330
00:11:02,618 --> 00:11:04,185
This is why we're alive.
331
00:11:07,884 --> 00:11:09,799
What the fuck?
332
00:11:09,843 --> 00:11:10,931
Rick,
say this isn't true.
333
00:11:10,974 --> 00:11:12,715
-It isn't the whole truth.
-Both: Liar!
334
00:11:12,759 --> 00:11:14,891
-It's complicated!
-I'm not busy.
335
00:11:14,935 --> 00:11:16,719
Okay, Morty, remember when
I said all I need
336
00:11:16,763 --> 00:11:18,765
was your apology
and a screwdriver in my hand?
337
00:11:18,808 --> 00:11:21,376
Well, I forgot I literally
have a screwdriver in my hand.
338
00:11:21,419 --> 00:11:23,813
I mean, duh-doy.
I'm basically Inspector Gadget.
339
00:11:23,857 --> 00:11:24,814
Uh-oh.
340
00:11:26,468 --> 00:11:28,600
It's okay.
He's free to go.
341
00:11:28,644 --> 00:11:31,908
He's the Rickest Rick.
We'll never see him again.
342
00:11:33,780 --> 00:11:35,433
Morty, when you came here
for that serum,
343
00:11:35,477 --> 00:11:36,913
did you refill this gun?
344
00:11:36,957 --> 00:11:38,219
Yeah.
345
00:11:38,262 --> 00:11:41,004
Oh. Ooh!
Holy shit!
346
00:11:41,048 --> 00:11:43,441
I only know one man that ever
hacked my portal gun,
347
00:11:43,485 --> 00:11:45,313
and it turned out
it was evil you.
348
00:11:45,356 --> 00:11:47,445
Yay!
He's all caught up.
349
00:11:48,795 --> 00:11:50,405
Wait. Hold it.
Hold it.
350
00:11:52,146 --> 00:11:55,018
-Who -- Who's that?
-Time for Big Boy. Duck!
351
00:11:55,062 --> 00:11:57,673
Ohhhhhh! Ohhhhhh!
Ohhhhh!
352
00:11:57,717 --> 00:11:58,892
Does he like it?
353
00:11:58,935 --> 00:12:00,154
It's a metaphor
for capitalism, Morty.
354
00:12:00,197 --> 00:12:01,982
What do you think?
355
00:12:02,025 --> 00:12:04,114
Ohhhhhh! Ohhhhhh!
Ohhhhhh!
356
00:12:04,158 --> 00:12:05,333
Ohh! Ohhhhhh!
357
00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:07,814
[ Grunting ]
358
00:12:07,857 --> 00:12:10,817
Ohhhhhh! Ohhhhhh!
Ohhhhh!
359
00:12:10,860 --> 00:12:12,079
[ Grunts ]
360
00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:16,039
Ohhhhhh! Ohhhhhh!
Ohhhhh!
361
00:12:16,083 --> 00:12:17,911
Ohhhhhh!
362
00:12:19,173 --> 00:12:20,478
Rick: Yoink!
363
00:12:20,522 --> 00:12:23,177
You can't outrun your past,
Rick.
364
00:12:23,220 --> 00:12:25,832
Did you think my force field
would be down the second time?
365
00:12:25,875 --> 00:12:28,269
I was expressing disapproval
of your dialogue.
366
00:12:28,312 --> 00:12:30,184
[ Chuckles ]
Disapprove all you want.
367
00:12:30,227 --> 00:12:33,230
Tonight, the quality of dialogue
stops mattering.
368
00:12:33,274 --> 00:12:36,016
Tonight, I do that thing
I want to do
369
00:12:36,059 --> 00:12:37,669
with the curve thing.
370
00:12:41,195 --> 00:12:43,893
Loudspeaker: Nobody leave.
Everybody stay.
371
00:12:43,937 --> 00:12:45,155
Nobody leave.
Everybody stay.
372
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:48,942
[ Mortys screaming ]
373
00:12:48,985 --> 00:12:50,944
Aaaaaaah!
374
00:12:50,987 --> 00:12:52,597
[ Gunfire ]
375
00:12:52,641 --> 00:12:54,817
Nobody leave.
Everybody stay.
376
00:12:54,861 --> 00:12:56,514
In uncertain times like these,
377
00:12:56,558 --> 00:12:58,603
I think it's important for me
to say, eat shit, fuck you.
378
00:12:58,647 --> 00:13:00,257
The drug companies paid for me
to say every word.
379
00:13:00,301 --> 00:13:01,693
I have millions of dollars,
380
00:13:01,737 --> 00:13:03,260
and I don't care if you live --
oh, God!
381
00:13:03,304 --> 00:13:05,436
Oh, fuck! No! Aah!
382
00:13:05,480 --> 00:13:07,395
And I'd just like to say that
prescription drugs are great,
383
00:13:07,438 --> 00:13:09,614
and you should buy them now.
384
00:13:09,658 --> 00:13:11,094
Morty:
What's happening, Rick?
385
00:13:11,138 --> 00:13:12,443
He hacked the entire city's
portal supply.
386
00:13:12,487 --> 00:13:14,402
Come on, there still might be
one way out of here --
387
00:13:14,445 --> 00:13:15,533
out the bottom.
388
00:13:15,577 --> 00:13:21,713
♪
389
00:13:21,757 --> 00:13:23,411
What do you think he needed
from your brain?
390
00:13:23,454 --> 00:13:26,109
I assume schematics for the
Citadel's dimensional drive.
391
00:13:26,153 --> 00:13:27,502
If he's gonna use it
to blow the curve,
392
00:13:27,545 --> 00:13:28,938
we do not want to be here.
393
00:13:28,982 --> 00:13:29,852
What is
the Central Finite Curve?
394
00:13:29,896 --> 00:13:31,680
Q&A after our survival.
395
00:13:31,723 --> 00:13:33,987
Hopefully we can snag some
untainted fluid at the source
396
00:13:34,030 --> 00:13:36,467
and get the fuck
out of here.
397
00:13:36,511 --> 00:13:38,034
Or not.
398
00:13:40,123 --> 00:13:42,909
Wow. I thought my capitalism
metaphor was on the nose.
399
00:13:42,952 --> 00:13:44,954
Ow! Oh!
400
00:13:44,998 --> 00:13:46,521
So did you help build
the Citadel?
401
00:13:46,564 --> 00:13:47,870
Do you just lie to me
about everything?
402
00:13:47,914 --> 00:13:49,741
Can't we just sneak
through the cave base?
403
00:13:49,785 --> 00:13:51,918
We turned a new leaf, Morty.
We're back to simple adventures.
404
00:13:51,961 --> 00:13:53,963
It's not a new leaf
until you tell me everything.
405
00:13:54,007 --> 00:13:55,573
Morty, we really don't
have time for this.
406
00:13:55,617 --> 00:13:57,445
The whole place
-is gonna blow. -No, I-I don't trust you.
407
00:13:57,488 --> 00:13:59,142
I-I don't want to
do this anymore
408
00:13:59,186 --> 00:14:00,578
if I'm not gonna get
straight answers from you.
409
00:14:00,622 --> 00:14:02,102
God damn it!
410
00:14:02,145 --> 00:14:03,016
Here's my fucking
downloaded brain, Morty.
411
00:14:03,059 --> 00:14:04,669
You want to
jump the shark?
412
00:14:04,713 --> 00:14:06,106
You want to know my stupid
crybaby backstory?
413
00:14:06,149 --> 00:14:08,586
Knock yourself out.
Not -- not now!
414
00:14:08,630 --> 00:14:15,550
♪
415
00:14:15,593 --> 00:14:17,552
[ Explosion ]
416
00:14:17,595 --> 00:14:41,184
♪
417
00:14:41,228 --> 00:14:42,751
[ Explosion ]
418
00:14:42,794 --> 00:15:58,174
♪
419
00:15:58,218 --> 00:16:00,394
[ Whirring ]
420
00:16:00,437 --> 00:16:20,066
♪
421
00:16:20,109 --> 00:16:22,198
[ Laughing ]
422
00:16:22,242 --> 00:16:25,419
♪
423
00:16:25,462 --> 00:16:28,291
[ Laughter ]
424
00:16:28,335 --> 00:16:30,076
-Boo ya, Rick.
-Nice one, Morty!
425
00:16:31,642 --> 00:16:33,601
Whoa. Dead wife?
426
00:16:33,644 --> 00:16:35,472
Yes, now everyone
can shut up about it.
427
00:16:35,516 --> 00:16:38,910
Wow, Rick, I feel a lot better
having seen all that.
428
00:16:38,954 --> 00:16:40,173
[ Chuckles ]
Of course that's the case.
429
00:16:40,216 --> 00:16:43,263
In their minds,
they're the underdogs.
430
00:16:43,306 --> 00:16:45,482
And that's how
they justify this.
431
00:16:45,526 --> 00:16:47,745
[ Whirring ]
432
00:16:47,789 --> 00:16:49,051
Rick: Morty,
I'm not responsible
433
00:16:49,095 --> 00:16:50,226
for every fucked-up Rick
out there.
434
00:16:50,270 --> 00:16:51,488
They literally all
say that.
435
00:16:51,532 --> 00:16:52,750
They all have that excuse.
436
00:16:52,794 --> 00:16:54,143
It's part of their system.
437
00:16:54,187 --> 00:16:55,275
None of them have to be
responsible.
438
00:16:55,318 --> 00:16:57,103
They're all victims
of themselves.
439
00:16:57,146 --> 00:16:59,844
Oh, it's so hard to be a genius.
Couldn't you just die?
440
00:16:59,888 --> 00:17:00,932
Well, what are you
doing about it?
441
00:17:00,976 --> 00:17:02,499
Jack shit.
I'm leaving.
442
00:17:02,543 --> 00:17:04,501
Do you know what
the Central Finite Curve is?
443
00:17:04,545 --> 00:17:06,199
They built a wall
around infinity.
444
00:17:06,242 --> 00:17:08,201
They separated all
the infinite universes
445
00:17:08,244 --> 00:17:09,637
from all
the infinite universes
446
00:17:09,680 --> 00:17:11,639
where he's the smartest man
in the universe.
447
00:17:11,682 --> 00:17:13,119
Every version of us
has spent every version
448
00:17:13,162 --> 00:17:15,295
of all of our lives
in one infinite crib
449
00:17:15,338 --> 00:17:18,080
built around
an infinite fucking baby.
450
00:17:18,124 --> 00:17:19,125
And I'm leaving it.
451
00:17:19,168 --> 00:17:20,561
That's what makes me evil --
452
00:17:20,604 --> 00:17:22,128
being sick of him.
453
00:17:22,171 --> 00:17:24,782
If you've ever been sick of him,
you've been evil, too.
454
00:17:26,001 --> 00:17:28,438
Rick, did you really leave
the crows for me?
455
00:17:28,482 --> 00:17:32,007
Or did you come back
because they dumped you?
456
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:35,228
There you go, kid.
Now you're Evil Morty, too.
457
00:17:35,271 --> 00:17:36,925
Sooner or later
we all are,
458
00:17:36,968 --> 00:17:38,796
on this side
of the curve.
459
00:17:38,840 --> 00:17:41,364
[ Whirring ]
460
00:17:41,408 --> 00:17:47,936
♪
461
00:17:47,979 --> 00:17:49,807
-Ah!
-Ah!
462
00:17:49,851 --> 00:17:53,115
♪
463
00:17:53,159 --> 00:17:54,595
Don't worry, Morty.
We still got a way out
464
00:17:54,638 --> 00:17:56,510
they never thought of --
Operation Phoenix.
465
00:17:56,553 --> 00:17:58,120
Doesn't that still mean,
like, death?
466
00:17:58,164 --> 00:17:59,730
Sure, but the joke's
on them,
467
00:17:59,774 --> 00:18:01,384
'cause we just found a backdoor
to getting off this rock.
468
00:18:01,428 --> 00:18:03,734
[ Gunshot ]
469
00:18:03,778 --> 00:18:05,475
REROUTED.
REROUTED.
470
00:18:05,519 --> 00:18:08,217
A.I.: Rerouted.
Rerouted. Rerouted.
471
00:18:08,261 --> 00:18:09,697
[ All screaming ]
472
00:18:09,740 --> 00:18:12,743
Rerouted. Rerouted.
Rerouted.
473
00:18:12,787 --> 00:18:15,398
[ Explosion ]
474
00:18:15,442 --> 00:18:16,704
Oh, my fucking God!
475
00:18:16,747 --> 00:18:18,401
Come on, Morty.
We gotta go.
476
00:18:20,229 --> 00:18:22,275
Evil Morty:
You can come if you want.
477
00:18:22,318 --> 00:18:23,972
Don't blame me
if you don't.
478
00:18:24,015 --> 00:18:25,974
Ugh! From where I sit,
Morty,
479
00:18:26,017 --> 00:18:27,193
that's the best deal
on the table.
480
00:18:27,236 --> 00:18:31,022
I-I don't have
a real plan.
481
00:18:31,066 --> 00:18:33,634
[ Grunts ]
482
00:18:33,677 --> 00:18:35,984
Thanks, pal. I-I'm glad
you ignored my advice.
483
00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:37,855
It's just as well.
I lied.
484
00:18:37,899 --> 00:18:39,379
That second seat's
a toilet.
485
00:18:39,422 --> 00:18:41,163
Oh.
Super dick move.
486
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:42,817
But weirdly kind of cool
to admit it.
487
00:18:42,860 --> 00:18:44,601
Geez, you guys really are
bred for forgiveness.
488
00:18:44,645 --> 00:18:46,429
Let's go.
489
00:18:46,473 --> 00:18:48,431
♪
490
00:18:48,475 --> 00:18:50,520
[ All exclaiming ]
491
00:18:50,564 --> 00:19:01,227
♪
492
00:19:01,270 --> 00:19:03,968
Say goodbye to the Citadel,
fellas.
493
00:19:04,012 --> 00:19:06,188
[ Rumbling ]
494
00:19:06,232 --> 00:19:25,338
♪
495
00:19:25,381 --> 00:19:27,209
[ Rocket fires ]
496
00:19:27,253 --> 00:19:42,616
♪
497
00:19:42,659 --> 00:19:45,880
[ Both screaming ]
498
00:19:45,923 --> 00:20:14,125
♪
499
00:20:14,169 --> 00:20:16,650
[ Sighs ]
500
00:20:16,693 --> 00:20:22,090
♪
501
00:20:24,919 --> 00:20:26,486
[ Slurping and zapping ]
502
00:20:26,529 --> 00:20:58,431
♪
503
00:20:58,474 --> 00:21:00,737
Ooowee! Evil Morty.
504
00:21:00,781 --> 00:21:02,522
That was quite a scheme.
505
00:21:02,565 --> 00:21:05,002
Makes me wonder if there's
an evil me out there.
506
00:21:05,046 --> 00:21:07,353
But I guess sometimes
I look at my life,
507
00:21:07,396 --> 00:21:10,225
and I may not even need him,
'cause, well,
508
00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:12,706
guess I've made a pretty big
mess of things myself.
509
00:21:12,749 --> 00:21:14,185
Ooowee.
510
00:21:14,229 --> 00:21:16,318
Never got my job
at the university back.
511
00:21:16,362 --> 00:21:18,755
Remember that?
Rick made me do karate.
512
00:21:18,799 --> 00:21:20,409
It -- It was kinda funny.
513
00:21:20,453 --> 00:21:22,368
But I guess things
went downhill from there.
514
00:21:22,411 --> 00:21:24,761
Started isolating myself
from Amy.
515
00:21:24,805 --> 00:21:27,155
Used to tell her
everything I was feeling,
516
00:21:27,198 --> 00:21:28,722
but then I guess I stopped,
517
00:21:28,765 --> 00:21:31,202
'cause I wanted her to love
who she thought I was,
518
00:21:31,246 --> 00:21:33,553
not who I felt myself becoming.
519
00:21:33,596 --> 00:21:35,946
Ever think about how horrified
the people we love would be
520
00:21:35,990 --> 00:21:37,992
if they found out
who we truly are?
521
00:21:38,035 --> 00:21:41,996
So we just dig ourselves deeper
into our lies every day,
522
00:21:42,039 --> 00:21:45,478
ultimately hurting the only
people brave enough to love us.
523
00:21:45,521 --> 00:21:47,175
Wish I didn't do that.
524
00:21:47,218 --> 00:21:49,438
Wish I was brave enough
to love them back.
525
00:21:49,482 --> 00:21:52,006
I don't know.
Maybe you should try it.
526
00:21:52,049 --> 00:21:54,182
We don't have as much time
as we think.
527
00:21:54,225 --> 00:21:55,531
Ooowee.
528
00:21:57,272 --> 00:21:58,404
Man:
Did you get any of that?
529
00:21:58,454 --> 00:22:03,004
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