Original subtitles

Previously on "Gemusetto Death Beat[s]"...

On the soul-guiding boat of the eponymous Tytti,

Makasu makes friends with a serial killer,

who used to boil ferrets and microwave crawfish as a child.

Josie looks for sandwiches,

and Dr. Legs teaches common courtesy

before the whole crew crashes

into a frozen wasteland full of big very big.

Ah. Uh.

Yama: I'm a big guy.

I'm very big.

How did it get so cold?

My handsome areola are tightening like raisins.

We crashed somewhere frozen.

Full of the cream of snow. And ice poppies.

I think we were pulled off course by that big guy, Makasu.

Look at him.

I'm a big guy.

He's so big!

All these vengeful gods who want my soul!

Why's that?Don't you get it, Josie!

I spent my whole freakin' life playing sports against gods.

The ultimate sin!

I didn't know that about you.

It was a part you of me you didn't know about it,

but now you know about it.

I accept that, Makasu.

You...

You accept me?

Huhhhhhhhhhh.

Yama: I'm big.

I'm going to get the sinner man.

♪♪

♪♪

♪ Gemusetto, Gemusetto, Gemusetto, Gemusetto ♪

♪ Gemusetto, Gemusetto, Gemusetto, Gemusetto ♪

-♪ Gemusetto -♪ Gemusetto!

Ma'am, I'm doing my best to get my clavicle out of your coochie.

Well, it's still in my coochie.

-Well, I can tell -- -Can you guys

all just shut up about the coochies

until the boat starts running and we get to Hell?

Tytti: Everyone, please stay seated!

I love this boat!

Ahh! I love this boat!

Oh, oh, oh.

From what I can get here...Uh-huh...

This is Adlivun.Oh, okay.

The Inuit frozen wasteland.

No, I already knew that, Dr. Legs. Uh-huh.

But that twisted thing, making moves at us?

You see that big guy right there?

-I'm very big. -That looks like Yama.

-Ohhh. -Hindu god of death.

We're not paying attention as much right now

'cause Josie and I have decided to bond by wiping

all this used toilet paper --And those?

Dra--See those creatures?

Dr. Legs?Those creatures under him?

That -- that -- I said we're putting --

Those are his messengers of death!

I said --Adlivun smashing ass to ass

with the Hindu underworld,

merging Yama with the Tupilaq.

I'm making a stand from what I've learned from me

and Josie's messy crafts here is the fact that

the environment is always in danger

and we cannot be using single-use plastics

or toilet paper.

Which is why I've invented

blow your nose before you wipe you ass.

The-th-they-th-they're right in front of you.

Th-They're -- They're right there!

No, Dr. Legs, I was telling you --

They're right in front of me, man!

Okay. Agh!

I compose you! Keith!

Ble-ble-bleh, bleh-blebleh blup!

Get it together, Keith.Bllrrh!

We're going ice skating today, but it's not for fun.

It's for combat!

We got a whole mess of freaks comin' at us!

Debu-Seek and Destroy!

Like Debussy. Okay.

The piano man.

Bwum, bwum, bwum, bwum, bwum, bweha!

I don't know if Keith can beat him,

even if he do weed out the minions.

Bwah! Ah!

Keith! Keith! Keith! Keith!

Hit by a pot of oil!

It's hot!

It's hot and cold at the same time.

Peartle!

Support him, with your Rap Drums.

Bwaaaaaaaa-wah!

Bwep! Bwayayayayaya!

Aah! [ Coughs ]

You stupid piece of shit.

That red shirt man is my soul quarry to ferry!

I let them on my boat so they'd let their guard down,

so I could deliver his soul!

That's my plan!

I'm no-- not gonna let you ruin it!

Tytti? Ahh...

The captain? She betrayed us!

Naval officers always betray me!

Oh! Ah! Oooh! I'm getting spanked! Ahh!

Y'all try something?

But I don't know, man.

I'm gonna try to get the boat runnin'.

I'm guessing this Tytti wants her ass

out of here as much as we do.

Cool her down like cucumber in a fridge, Doc.

We got this.

Badum chick!

Blep! Blup!

Blep! Bluuup!

Dr. Legs: This bastardization of faiths,

a problematic combination of two religions.

Move!It's disgusting and a culturally insensitive byproduct

of the universe unfolding!

Oh, uh, I'm so hungry for snacks.

This blood ring is sappin' my energy.

Yama's got a magical musical blood ring power as well!

♪♪

♪♪

That whale's got a whole harp in its mouth.

Yama's whale is so fat 'cause

he eats harps, which are full of carbs!

Yo mama's so fat 'cause, uh, heh, uhh.

Makasu!

My mama's got diabetes!

Yo mama's so diabetic,

she the sweetest thing I seen all day.

We are best friends.

We're best friends now.

Oh!

Oooh! Oh, God!

I'm big!

He wants me.

And he wants me ice cold sucky Popsicle time.

But we gotta keep this boat safe!

I'm gonna corndog that way so I can distract him.

Arpeggiate Lily Pad!

Huuup!

Drum Line Roll!

I'll make sure your path is clear, pal!

Ahh! Hey, square, I'm right here, man!

Bleep. Ivory Blip!

Blee-oh! Ivory Blip!

Blee-oh! Wha' happenin'?

Piano Note Attack, come on!

No, he's coming!

He's gonna swallow me whole

and I'll slide down his 'sophagus

and end up being digested

like the little bitch boy vore baby I am.

Hold on. He's still just walkin' here!

Bitch is ignoring the [bleep] outta me.

I'm a big guy.

What if he's so mixed up from the merge-mishmash,

he's not after me...Blip!

...but after someone else?!

In the boat?! Oh! Oh!

Oh, no! Oh, oh, Makasthu, this sucks.

Shit. He's gonna steal my soul quarry.

Break my goddamn boat. My favorite boat!

He's gone mad. Ahh!

Tytti. You!

Tytti. Ahh!

You let me on even though

I'm a nondenominational chaos companion.

Can you please stop touching my tiny toys?

Tytti: Let 'em on, nerd.

Dr. Legs: You even called your ticket man a nerd.

Which was maybe a step too far.

Trying too hard to hide the fact you wanted to trick

Makasu to get on your boat

so you can deliver his soul for judgment.

What? Don't matter none now if Yama crashes my boat.

We're all stuck here! Dang!

That merge Yama madness out there...

Half Inuit ghost, half Hindu and Buddhist death god,

he wouldn't have the sanity to do much other than instinct.

Makasu may be Hell's most wanted, but Hell is broken.

I think Yama's after someone else.

All those Yamaduta, messengers of death,

they're carrying pots of oil.

Like the Hindu punishment of Kumbhipaaka.

Someone who cooks birds or animals alive

will be boiled in oil for one year

for each hair of the animals they hurt,

which reminds me of your passenger Kelvin.

You see, when I was just a kid, I microwaved living crawfish.

Got sort of a high from their high-pitched squealing

they made in their death knells.

Oh. Gasp!

He walked up on me!

You're not dead. You're not just a corpse.

I'm not. I'm not alive either.

There's a first time for everything!

Ahh.

[ Engine sputtering ]

Piss tits.

This better work, bro!

It's gotta work!

We shoved Peartle's drum sticks deep down the blow hole

of Harpsiwhale, and now we're stretching your noodle arms

across the frozen wasteland.

So we can trip Yama into the ice

and hopefully suck all his little blue boys with him.

Legatto Leg Trip!

Bwah, bwah, bwah, bwah, bwah, bwah!

Keith's musical frog powers tickles my noodle arms!

-Bleh. -I'm a big guy.

Uhh!

But what about the whale?

This is the biggest part of the trick.

Musical Battle Robot Rings are powers we control

with our blood rings, and knocking out

Yama briefly will yank the magical blood soul force

that is the Harpsiwhale back into his body.

But because we plugged it with Peartle's sticks,

they will go rushing into Yama's god blood stream

and fill him with wood from wooden drum sticks

and then splinter his veins,

and then he'll just become blood.

Just like you said it would happen! Hah!

He's now a big mess of blood goop

because of wooden splinters from drum sticks.

A song as old as time.

Dr. Legs: No, you can't!

Both: Dr. Legs!

Tytti, you can't let him do this!

If you die, chaos fingers,

my quarry won't have the guidance it needs,

and I can ship him off to whatever Hell wants him!

Where's the Doc?!

Well, she came in here, she says...Uh-huh.

...over the intercom, she says...Uh-huh.

...put on your seatbelts.Uh-huh. Okay.

And of course I did know of someone

who did die of a seatbelt auto erratic issue.

Ahh!

Uh-huh.

I wonder what you taste like

if you're made of the chaos of the universe falling apart!

Please, Queen Tytti! Tytti Queen!

If Makasu doesn't do what he needs to do,

your afterlives will stop existing!

Finnish, Christian, other religions.

Scientology, Prescatarian...

You seen that chimeric monster that fell outside!

That's just the beginning of things to come, Tytti!

Come on. Scream, miss.

Scream.

Watch out, Makasu!

This place was full of scary ghosts earlier!

Ah! That sounds awesome,

but we gotta save Dr. Legs first!

Wow, he's so brave.

Doc!

Ah! I hate how much I bleed.

One little scratch and it's like Aunt Flo

came to visit with all 40 of her sisters.

[ Laughs ] I love period jokes!

I've never heard Aunt Flo before. That is funny.

I love that, wha-- she's, like, your Aunt who, like, visits,

but it's not a fun visit.

You're best gal pals now?

I convinced Tytti our cause was worth fighting for, Makasu.

I'm Tytti, like the breast.

And as a ferry woman, I'm less stubborn than a god.

Also, I double killed that dead murderer with this,

hidden on my blurred-out breast!

My blood ring!

Which summons Yacht Cock!

Oh, ho! Cock!

Ahh, yeah! And that's the guy you did it on!

I love that rooster.

♪ He's a big guy now

♪ Big guy

♪ Stompin' around

♪ So freakin' big

♪ Big guy

Next time, on "Gemusetto Death Beat[s]"...

What is the next place this boat takes them?

Suicide Town?

Grab your garters and get your bits in a twist

for this wild show for zoomers and boomers.

Hold on...