Original subtitles

Narrator: Previously on "Gemusetto Death Beat[s]"...

With the power of his musical battle amphibian,

Keith the Keytar frog,

Makasu defeats Egyptian and Greek gods of death

who are in his way, as Dr. Legs leads them

through the next afterlife,

promising to teach our hero lessons of friendship.

-Uhh! Uhh! -Ahh! Ahh!

Makasu: Dr. Legs, my nondenominational

chaos fingers companion, has been teaching me

how to have less self-centered conversations.

Oh, my God!

Oh, wow, screaming! Ow, oh!

I had just asked her moments ago a brain quiz --

Brain quiz, Dr. Legs.

Hey. Go for it, dude.

Sometimes, when other people are smiling,

I wanna punch them in the stomach.

[ Echoing ] Ahhhh! Oh!

I should have known that a brain quiz

isn't just an excuse to talk about myself and complain.

I'm gonna have to be a harsh mommy this whole episode.

No.

I'm gonna have to be a harsh mommy

this whole adventure, Makasu.

Harsh...

like the em-breast of Mother's bosom...

Ohhhhhh...

Empathy!

To unlock the true power of self-love,

you gotta learn to love others

and understand their points of view.

The "L" word is so hard for me to say, Dr. Legs.

Gyah!

But I will learn to luchador myself

and thus throughout that property of self-luchador-ing,

have the capacity to embrace luchador-ing others.

Exactly. Cou- Yeah, I like that.

Y-You like that? Yeah.

And then you will be able to --

Robot voice: Luchador....the musical frog in your blood ring.

Anfibio musical.

The frog?

That's the only dang tool powerful enough

for us to save the dang universe, Makasu.

Thanks for the lesson, Dr. Legs.

Legs. Another "L" word.

Lesson. Another "L" word.

Lesion, another leg word.

I'm poking at the gashes in my leg.

Oh! Show respect. [ Smooches ]

You kiss the ring, too.[ Smooches ]

[ Water rushing ]

Styx is leadin' us forward,

carving a path through another ancient afterlife --

The Mesopotamian Underworld of Kur.

Ugh! I fell down.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Bland. Boring.

So devoid of flavor and personality.

Agh!

I gotta stop eating these stupid fish crackers

that aren't covered in flavor dust, Dr. Legs.

That's the only consensus I've come to.

Makasu: I gotta keep eating all these fish crackers

just to feel something in my mouth.

I have an oral fixation.

Nyum nyum nyum nyum.

Kur -- The folks here continue on after death

acting out a shadow version of life on Earth.

♪ Fish cracker, paw pee paw ♪

There is no food here... only dust!

Heh-heh, hehe. Eh.

Ahh, yeah, I got a nice -- Oh, no, that's a tonsil stone.

[ Laughs ] It's not a place for "final judgment"

and all that -- the dead aren't punished or rewarded

for how they live on Earth, which means we'll have a break

from all the gods wiling after your soul, little sinner man.

I'm not little.

I'm 5'10, Dr. Legs.

Makasu: I'm almost 5'10.

Are you 5'10?

Should I take out my tape measure?

I'm gonna wear it like a headband.

You like this?

Now I'm the princess of geometry.

Ahh! Aw, snap!

[ Echoing ] I've been dethroned!

Dr. Legs, I need to take a load off -- Okay.

...so I'm gonna go be obnoxious -- Alright.

...to the dead people in this house -- this house of food.

Look at all these poor dried-up milfs.

Oh, my hand went right through his head!

Ha-ha! Zwim, zwim.

Uh.... Man, that's my head.

At least when I died, which was recently,

I kept all my skin, butt, and flesh.

[ Chuckles ] Unlike you, you little stinker, you.

Seriously, guy, don't get me angry!

Ohh, I'm makin' you angry!Dude.

Get off me! Huh?

Dr. Legs doesn't have her own

tiny fingers to grab things.

When she squishes me,

she is herself the two giant pickles.

Empathy, bruh.

Don't just explode at these dudes.

They died thousands of years ago.

Oh, I'll show you empanada. Empathy!

Empaheee-wuh...

What?Ahh, you know what?

I really pity you milfs.

Must feel like you were born in "the wrong generation,"

ending up in an afterlife like this.

If you were alive in the freakin' 19th century,

you could've been a Mormon.

And they get an entire [bleep] planet when they die.

[Bleep] and [bleep] every day.

And depending on where the planet is located on its orbit,

the days there could last months, or even years!

How many millennia has it been

since someone brushed up your arm hairs, Miss Robinson?

Wait, there's other religions?

O-Ohh, yeah, there's other religions.

Most of them bigots.

The only things I can touch are dust, wood, and these tokens!

But not other dead people! Ha!

Ugh! That's it!

I want [bleep] planet!

I want to feel other people!

Not just these tokens!

Huh? What the...

A noodle caught that token the dead Mesopotamian threw at me.

[ Grunting ] My blood ring feels danger.

It wants to summon Keith.

[ Echoing ] Because of this noodle?

-Oh, boy! -My dust!

I was eating that dust.

Ah! Nyum nyum nyum nyum.

You dusty milfy Mesopotamians figured out

how to piss me off right quick.

I ain't no Meso-po-tamian.

Well, I'm gonna make a mess o' pot these nuts

if you don't back the heck off.

Whose nuts? Somebody's nuts.

I don't know, aren't you a God?

-Nyum. -Gods know things!

Ugh! Whoa!

Egh! Oh!

Keeeeith!

-Hewwo! -[ Laughs ]

I ain't no God, neither.

Makasu!

That man isn't a deity after your soul!

He's just some dead guy!

Then why's he got this tight little ass, Dr. Legs?

He must have come here from another underworld!

[ Gasps ] Ah, shit! Ah, man.

Alright. Alright.

This table's 3 feet wide.

I've crawled here --Ugh!

...regaining my spirit form gradually

as you have, unintentionally,

through the irony of fate, pulled my tortured corpse

out of the Egyptian Lake of Fire

and given me a chance at revenge!

My soul was trapped there as punishment for the crime...

of appropriation.

At a wicked house party when I was young and shallow,

I had these tattoos graven on my skin

with henna dyes and a stick-and-poke.

This was enough for me to earn the ire of the Egyptians

and condemn my soul to death!

Some basic-ass ankhs and stuff.

Surprised you weren't condemned to douchebag hell

where everyone's got tramp stamps that say "Hello!"

-Hello. -[ Groans ]

-Makasu! -Huh!

Fish cracker. [ Munching ]

Ohh, I see, you've made a new friend.

I've made a new pal of my own.

You see, back on Earth, I used to beat up on rich kids.

Now I beat up on something a little different.

B-Beatin' your pee-pee knee? [ Laughs ]

It's a boner!

Masturbating, Dr. Legs.

Just like the masturbating.

Let me introduce you to my new pal --

Neil Peartle, The rushing drumset turtle!

[ Drum banging ]Ooh, ohh!

Ooh, oh, ow. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah,

Uh, yeah. Oh! Now, uh...

Come on, let's hit 'em with a back beat beat down!

Documentary Narrator: The backbeat is a strong rhythmic accent

on what is normally an unaccented beat in a measure.

For instance, in a common 4/4 time signature,

the back beat would occur on beats 2 and 4.

It's roots are quite modern, tracing back to the 1940s

or '30s, but now dominates R&B, jazz,

and pop music,

and is said to make tunes more danceable.

[ Drumming ]Whoa!

What the heck's going on here?!

Unf! Bitch got my shirt all wet.

[ Panting ]

Makasu! Who is this guy?!

I-I never really paid attention

to other people and their bullshit

before you told me to do that thing...

Empathy? Yeah.

Empazema. Huh!

I -- whatever.Empathy.

E...Yeah, it starts with E, okay?

...M-P-A-T-H.

Empathy. Empuhee.

Yeah, well, uh... He's gotta be someone

I pissed off at some point.

Pissed off?!

You killed me, Makasu!

I killed a lot of people!

You 're just a guy, man!

I'm doing my redemption thing.

Can you go beat your drum off somewhere else, sir?

Heh-heh. Gross, dude.

Hah ha ha. Hahaha, bweth a bwoner.

Hah!

Huh! Huh!

-Big old wiener! -D'oh!

Guh-guh! Guh! Guh!

It's over now! No -- ugh!

[ Debris clattering ]

It's not-- it wasn't over!

-Blwath! -Ugh!

Keith, you okay?

[ Groans ] Bweh.

[ Gasping ]

We gotta get out of here, Makasu!

We gotta reach the cosmic river intersection

outside of Kur and board the ferry!

[ Neck cracking ] This pretty boy ain't gettin' on no ferry.

The only person who calls me "fairy" was my dad.

We don't have time for your dad issues!

I've got a lot of dad issues, Dr. Legs.

But we don't have time for it!

I've got lots of issues!

Then what are you doing?

You gonna run with your boy Dr. Legs to this boat,

or you gonna beat this guy at his own drum?

'Cause any other answer, and the universe falls apart

and your soul, his soul, every soul from here

to [bleep] planet becomes sparkles of nothing

in the glint of the void!

Ugh! Uuugh!

-Makasu. -Ugh!

-Makasu! -Egh, egh.

-Noodle arms. -Egggh!

-Makasu! -Ugh!

-[ Grunting ] -Mmmmmm...

Rrrrah!

I've killed gods with sports.

I can beat a man up at musical robots.

Especially one who's dead.

[ Laughing ]

I spent too long dreaming of this revenge

for it go down without a fight.

Remind me -- Hmmm?

How did I kill you again?

13 years ago --

Oh, yeah, now I remember.

♪♪

♪ Ohh, it's my little sexy move ♪

♪ Where I go when I die is my favorite ♪

♪ Sexy planet, sexy planet

♪ Die, die

Narrator: Next time on "Gemusetto Death Beat[s]"...

Will the man Makasu killed 13 years ago

be able to best him in musical robot combat?

Is this a waste of everyone's time?

Or is it a learning opportunity?

Dr. Legs isn't happy about it.

Makasu isn't happy about it.

No one's happy about anything.

People don't like each other these days.