Original subtitles

My name is Bendy Rivers. Ah.

I'm a former INTERPOL spiritual detective

and currently a stay-at-home nyan nyan kitty maid

for my wife, Sonia.

Nyan nyan.

I shouldn't look at these papers.

[ Glass shattering ]

[ Growling and snarling ]

Honey, brought you a pre-Oh.

Oh, what a good kitten man.

You're such a good kitten man. You are so good.

What a good man you are.

I love you so much. I love you!

♪ And you never stop running

♪ And we never stop running away! ♪

♪ Oh, what you gonna do?

♪ When those rivers come after you? ♪

♪ There's a lot of fun in loving ♪

♪ But there's no fun in a love that's gone grey ♪

♪ Oh, what you gonna do with the kids? ♪

♪ With the kids!

♪ Bendy's not gonna stay!

Hey what's up? What's new?

God-dang it. Ahhh.

I think I like it, you know?

Being a nyan nyan kitty maid.Ahh, ahh.

Is this for what makes you horny,

or is this for what makes you feel pretty?

Or like a furry? Is it a question?

Am I saying, like, a question?

Oh, man, I got glass in my tongue.

I'm glad you 're all in town saying hello,

even if it is brief.

My -- my favorite cousin is a furry.

Hold still.

My favorite cousin's a furry, actually.

-Okay. -A furry, yeah!

Well, the INTERPOL Spiritual Super Prison

is in the Bahamas. Hmmm.

Yeah, and all the old case archives, yeah?

Nice! Nostalgia's a dish best served nasty.

And you're spending your retirement here?

-Hmm. -In the beautiful Bahaaaamas.

Hmmm.

I'm sure your wife loves the Bahamas.

Hmm. Ahh.

I worked with these little guys for so long.

And last week, since my retirement,

they've been ridding the world of spiritual disturbances

on their own lonesome.

Oh, God.

Oh, God. Oh, God.

Oh, ah. No. Oh, sh--

[ Grunting ] Oh, God.

They got the Anfanc of Wales...

Get outta here, man. I'm a cop.

...where it preyed on people swimming in Llyn Barfog.

Mm-mm. Mm-mm-mm.

I'm disgusted by you.

[ Grunts ]

World isn't safe until it's rid of the supernatural menaces

that stop us from swimming places

like this here Llyn Barfog.

Do you still wear diapers?

Good girl.

I'm gonna go get me a pint from the pub.

I'm gonna pass out in a hotel. I'm gonna pass out in a taxi

and find my way to the hotel after.

Ahh-ow! Ahh.

I don't wash, uh, my hands anymore. Uh.

Sabrina's been doing such a good job.

The other day she put a Wendigo in a choke hold.

-Oh. -Who's the shit bitch now?

-I-I-I'm sorry. Rrrrrrr!

didn't mean to call you a shit bitch.

-Hmm. -Ahh!

Things are going okay at home, I just, uhhh...

Don't tell me you're thinking about

the Makasu file again, are you, Bendy?

-Squirt, squirt! -Ahhhh!

You know if there was anything happening with the Makasu file,

we would take care of it.

You're retired, you little pissy shit bitch.

You're in the Bahamas.

Mm.

We got in a fight recently.

♪ Dun-dun-dun-dun-dun- dun-dun-dun-dun-dun ♪

Hey, honey, you're kind of blocking the view.

Ahhh![ Chuckles ] He's always trying to clean, right?

I'm trying to clean!

You don't always have to be cleaning!

Mama, please do not yell during our favorite kissing show.

Now I have to clean more because you make me angry.

Papa, please, it's our favorite -- ah!

Oh! Oh! Oh!

I'm spanking you!

Ahh!

What's happening to our family!

Why do you have to spank him so hard, Bendy?

I'm sorry, my almond.

I'm just trying to be the best maid I can be.

I know, but you resigned from the INTERPOL barely a week ago.

I sent a man to his death,

to be burnt by the sun.

I ran after him for so long,

and my life changed in an instant

and I gave up and let him die,

no due process, just a vengeful star

looking to engulf him.

[ Echoing ] Shit!

I've seen such joy in you when you clean sometimes,

like when you grab the pubes out of the drain.

The children are growing up so fast.

But you don't always have to be doing the cleaning.

Yeah, but sometimes I see the night sky

and I get nervous that maybe things have been going wrong

since I sent Makasu to his death.

Those are just weather balloons, baby baby.

[ Smooching ]

Bendy baby baby baby.

I don't know, honey. It looks like an omen.

Go pick up our son from the floor.

Ugh. Why do I have so many keys?

-Hey. -Oh, God.

-You dropped something. -Ah!

Yeah? Uh, uh, ooh.

I didn't mean to put those in the sewer.

Uh-oh. [ Laughs ]

I hate drunk drivers.

You know, you could hurt someone.

Ow!

[ Deep voice ] I am Abaddon, the Angel of Destruction

from a bottomless pit near the underworld of Sheol.

Our worlds are intertwining

in the great convergence of the end times.

Accept death because the all-sinner

has brought this upon -- ah!

I can't shake the feeling something odd is going on.

It's probably just guilt.

♪ Dunka-dunka-dunk

♪ Dunka-dunka-dunka-dunk

Unfinished business.

Never had that much in my life.

All my relationships ended with -- well, I was done,

or she was done.

[ Whistling air ]

My college girlfriend --

we went out for one and a half weeks.

I bought her 13 red roses and called them a baker's dozen

because I wanted her to be my little cake.

She lit them on fire and laughed at me

and told me I was a performance art project

to see if she could make someone fall in love with her

in seven days or less.

I had written her a note,

left it on the white board on her dormitory door.

She was the winner. I was the loser.

But it's okay.

It wasn't a good fit.

Not everything is a good fit.

[ Horn honks ]

You need some trainin' wheels on those legs?

The first thing I ever felt like a winner in was my career.

You, uhh...

Solving mythological crimes throughout the world.

Oh, is that right?

I thought we was gonna, uhh, swap spit,

if you know what I mean.

Like, through our penises?

And even though I found my new passion,

being a kitty maid for my wife... So...

...I feel I left with my biggest case unresolved.

I guess we're, um...Makasu.

Just keep driving, huh?

The man who stole religious relics from gods

by playing them in sports.

Yeah, I've picked up a lot of sweet dirty men

on the side of the road, and I gotta tell you,

this is the most boring, lamest story I've ever heard.

And I am not turned on anymore.

Stop your truck.Hey, hold on a sec.

I'm soft, man. I told you. I'm soft.

I can't do it anymore.Okay, bye.

Your personality is unattractive to me.

♪♪

The Chilean Darwin's frog,

found in the Talca province,

rare, critically endangered.

What brought it to the Bahamas?

Bahaaaamas.

Looks like a leaf.

I'm so sorry.

♪♪

♪ Okay, now, wash your hands

♪ Okay, now, wash your hands

Bendy: Ah!

♪ Okay, now, wash your hands

♪ Soap and water!

♪ Wash your hands.

♪ Soap

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh

♪ Hey, hey, hey, hey

Will you take me to the Bahamas?

-Oh! -No!

Who just put their butt on me?

It's the blind janitor, Guillermo.

Truth is...

I was never blind.

Guillermo?! Hah.

I always thought you were blind.

Back when I used to clean up messes at Ocean Park Bahaaamas,

an orca fell on the audience

because I didn't catch the funnel cake

left on a plate in the front row.

Ah, yeah.

Guillermo: That monster was hungry for sugar and dough,

and it jumped out.

I got hit.

But not as bad as the children who died.

Oh.And because of this,

I pretended to be blind from the accident...

Oh, that......so that people would pity me.

That's very sad to hear.

Anyway, Bendy, why are you trying

to get to those secret files over there?

And is it true that you both sexually identify

as a cat and a maid? Because the truth is --

Agh!

What cruel irony that I'm blinded by the Wendigo's fangs

and eaten whole and raw.

Oh, my God!

He ate Guillermo whole and raw.

Who's the shit bitch now?

-Ah! -Hey! Hey!

S-- are you throwing sponges at me?

Yeah!

You seem a little selfish and navel-gazy,

like you spend a lot of time in your head.

I do.

Ooh, I've never had man-cat before.

The w-- that writing looks important

on that piece of paper down there.

[ Coughing ]What's on that piece of paper down there?

It looks important.[ Gasps ]

Where -- where -- wait, where'd it go?

Then I saw it --

why the world felt fragile and full of omens.

I always missed things that were right in front of me

because I moved too fast, too dumb, too cocky.

But there it was, right below where it said

Makasu had a B-cup for a man in terms of breast size.

It was my fault.

When I let the sportsman die,

I doomed the universe to a celestial convergence.

Every religion was trying to judge his soul,

and it was a matter of weeks or even days

before they ripped into the mortal world as well.

This is great jewelry. I would love to have this.

This is from jail?

Oh, man, my finger's too big.

That ring -- it says Makasu uses one similar to summon

a battle amphibian musical robot.

Why didn't they tell me this?

That my criminal, that he was responsible

for folding the universe in on itself?

Nya! Hey, whoa!

Whoa. Get off, hobbit.Oh, oh.

Ahh, I dare you to kill me... Wait, wait.

...so I can use this ring to stop Makasu

from destroying the universe!

At this moment I consider everything,

all my choices and mistakes,

trying to close doors I just can't seem to stop

from opening.

My family, my wife, my Sonia --

I said I'd give up everything for them,

and here I am, throwing that all away,

stuck in stupid circles.

I tried to pretend being a nyan nyan kitty maid

was enough, but...

I am a spiritual detective.

Ahh. Oh. Ahh.

Hey.

♪ Why be stuck in a depressive space? ♪

♪ Why you wanna rub glass all in your face? ♪

♪ Don't wanna clean house, let me show you how ♪

♪ We're gonna go straight to the Bahamas now ♪

♪ Come on, baby

Narrator: Next time on "Gemusetto Death Beat[s]" --

after miles of monologues,

our petite spiritual detective is disemboweled.

How will dying and traversing the afterlives

affect his psyche?

And what will happen when he finally finds Makasu,

his life-long prey?

Boopidy-boopity-doop.

[ Indistinct singing ]

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