Original subtitles

Inti: You've always been brilliant.

[ Makasu moaning ]

Ohhhh.

Whoa!

[ Moaning continues ]

[ Echoing ] Why...

were you... Your...

serve.

My name is Makasu,

and I'm an international sportsman

and religious-relic thief.

You might have heard of my heists

and my famous abilities in sports.

I always travel with my servant,

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear,

who lives in my back-pocket dimension.

Chirp! Chirp! Okay.

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Chirp!

Wa-ha! Chirp!

Wah! Wow!

Thank you, Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear.

I believe we're here at the ruins.

Chirp! Chirp!

Hah! You dirty whore boy, you!

Wa-ha-ho-ho! Ha-ha hee-hoo!

Ha-ha hee-hoo. You are a dirty whore boy!

Okay.

[ Wind whistles ]

Now, to use this rod.

[ To himself ] To use this rod I bought

in the Peruvian black market

with ancient counting ropes used in Incan times.

Chirp! Chirp!

Bitch, what's wrong with you, so-horny boy!

Chirp!

Please work.

[ Rumbling ]

♪♪

Oh, wow!

Ahh!

Outward Earth, move! Rah!

So, you've come, Makasu.

Hyah! You knew of my arrival.

My repu-- perp-- My repre-- uh [bleep] me.

All deities know of your exploits.

I am infamous, incredibly cool,

and I am also the Internet.

You can't trick me, Maka-chan.

You are not the Internet.

You are a sportsman.

He knows I'm not the Internet.

Who is this guy?

You want the ultimate treasure of South America.

And I have no plans to stop you.

In fact, I would like to guide you

through the pachas of the Inca,

towards our secret vault of treasure.

Oh, wow!

But to claim what you seek, you must best the Gods in...

Peru tennis.

Oh, wow!

In order to get the true treasure of South America,

I'm challenging all the Incan gods to tennis.

I hope I can win.

Narrator: "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu"

What's wrong? I just said I wanted to help you.

Tennis is the sport I've always been worst at

and the "sport that makes me

the most emotional" sport of every sport.

It gives me... emotional memories.

Aw. Dang.

Ewww.

Even all this vibrating of my butt

on the rocks of the Andes,

on this butt surf down to Machu Picchu, isn't cheering me up.

Uhhhh.

Uh...

Gazelle-like leap! Aaaah!

Aaaah!

Makasu-san?

Don't look at me, Incan God.

I'm so not kawaii when I get emotional.

Kawaii is the name I've given

to my favorite dream island for Hawaii.

If it existed, it would be full of cute chibi cats

and they'd work at Cold Stone

and give me my favorite sherbet, with yogurt rocks.

And they'd live inside an ice cream.

Ah, interesting idea.

But you're known for never giving up,

no matter the sport needed for acquiring

the treasures you seek.

After everything you've done --

You don't know me! You only know stories.

In my dream, the island of Kawaii has a car cat.

The cat goes meow-meow for "purr,"

and the cars are also called Kyle.

The island of Kyle cats driving Kyle cars is a real island.

This is my dream island.

Wow!

God of Tennis: I thought he was going to be the one.

The volcano that formed Kawaii erupted

in very cute little fire guys.

Makasu: Islands are made from volcanoes

and exist in the ocean.

They're kinda the nipples of the sea.

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear...

Chirp!...my racket, please.

Okay.

Chirp!

Tennis was the only sport I wanted to avoid play...ing.

You wanna know why, Incan?

Chirp!My grandfather --

he played a similar game...

known as rac-quet-ball.

Aah. Hah!

I'm returning it, Grandpa.

He'd take me after hot dogs

to go play with him at rac-quet court.

Nice return, Makasu!

But the truth is, his passion for rac-quet was his undoing.

Aah! Brain!

Grandpa? Grandpa?

Grandfather!

The wound afflicted him with aphasia and a gradual dementia.

His passion for rac-quet balls "dequeriated."

Uh...They used to give us guns.

Hmm. Sent us into the jungle.

They told us to go kill people.

They told us to ki-i-ll!

Grandfathe-e-e-r!

Uh, the truth is, uh, this was his racket.

Get ahold of yourself!

You are not becoming your grandfather

just by playing tennis!

You are not stepping into Korea and mowing down

Communists with an American-made rifle.

You are merely playing tennis against bastardized motifs

of Incan religion.

And what do you know about me, about loss?!

You're a god -- too lofty

to even allow a mortal, like me,

have one sport they can't be the best at!

Chirp!

[ Sniffing ]

Coq au vin? Who is this guy?

God of Tennis: 1968, A.D. --

the year that changed everything.

Monsieur, monsieur, we are French cinema students

with French New Wave cinema. Uh, take our films!

Get away from me with your films!

Stomping away angrily to the café!

Quick! Let's make a film of that pigeon!

The Aboriginals of Australia believe

that if you capture something on camera, you steal its soul.

New Wave cinema stole the soul of my home.

I'm not originally an Incan deity.

I was part of a now-forgotten French Pantheon.

We resided in the most ancient of French landmarks --

the millions-of-years-old Tour Eiffel,

made of melted Neanderthal butts.

There were 12 of us --

Veronique, the Stepmother of all Gods;

Jean, God of the Nicotine;

Luc, God of Piss-Covered Cobblestones;

Woody Allen, God of Marrying Daughters;

Chloe, Goddess of Lady Hair All Over the Body,

Even the Hands; Roman Polanski, God of Pedophiles;

four other gods; and I, the God of Tennis.

French pantheon? I'm playing with my nipples.

How may I help you?

Just a Nescafé. "What else?"

Oh, you are a god, are you not?

We do not serve your kind here.

Je suis désolé.

Hey, you should really leave France.

Now that we have New Wave cinema and socialism,

we do not need gods.

They will kill you if they find you,

just like what they did with the others.

The students, with their cameras

and their riots.

It's 1968.

Time for a new generation --

generation of mortals.

[ Coos ]

Goodbye, pigeon!

God of Tennis: I was lost, without a family.

I tried to pretend to be mortal, hide in the metro.

Hey, I do tennis tricks.

I give blowjob and do tennis tricks.

I do 30-love, I do...

But our age was over.

I can put the tennis racket all the way up!

The only place I knew

exiled Europeans to survive was Argentina,

where the Nazis went after Nuremberg.

But they told me their bunks were all full

with sexy little Hitler boy clones

with big Brazil butts, and I'm no god of pedophiles.

Then, I met them -- the aging Incan gods,

almost obsolete themselves, and they took me in.

Because they love tennis.

Every pantheon loves a secret specific sport.

You know this more than anyone.

And the Incans, they loved tennis.

And as luck would have it,

you were the French God of Tennis.

Tennis. Tennis.

Both: Tennis!

Oh, ha-ha. Ha-ha-ha.

I guess I was lucky.

I'm so sorry I doubted the pain you went through.

It's such a moving story, and I'm lucky to have

a God of Tennis here to tell me what's to do with...

Both: Tennis.

Tennis!

Ha-ha-ha. I'm playing with my nipples again.

I am a strong boy with feelings of worth,

good at most sports, God of Tennis.

But on top of my emotional baggage, surrounding rackets,

my forehand smash lacks power and finesse.

Ughhh.

Ughhh.

Your stroke reeks of ignorance.

Warp with me to a more evocative setting,

and I will shower you with tennis lore.

Welcome to my inner sanctum.

[ Gasping ]

Makasu: The books, they breathe.

They teach, but reading makes me angry.

[ Mumbling ]

The official story on the World Wide Web

states that tennis harkens back to 12th-century France,

when and where I was born and awoke into my godhood.

But that's only a fraction of the story.

Tennis predates even the God of Tennis' divinity?

You see it, Makasu?

Cygnus rips a volley to Cassiopeia.

Cassiopeia wings it back.

Cygnus misses!

15-love!

30-15, you piece of shit.

But you get it.

This is where it all began and continues.

Sheer happenstance, beyond the heavens,

became a hobby spanning eons.

This was never covered in class!

School never prepares you for real life, about tennis.

My teachers are dumb.

The Dirty Clan.

The Dirty Clan hunted.

They gathered.

And they played tennis.

Theirs was a crude precursor to the sport of lawns.

Your eyes are opening.

Wow!

Look now at the sacrifices made to keep tennis relevant.

Tennis lore almost didn't survive the Beforetimes.

Early kings feared it.

Religions forbade it.

Were it not for the bravery of some,

like Thierry here, tennis might've perished.

-Aaah! -Thanks, Thierry!

Thierry would not have liked you.

[ Sighs ] But that was Thierry.

God of Tennis: A more enlightened age would follow,

where competing countries

would stage matches for years on end.

Whoa!One epic rally paused

for only a single hour on Christmas Eve...

Whoa!...when the players put down their rackets,

met in the center, and killed each other.

[ Explosion ]

Aaah!

Yes, tennis.

This is the knowledge I need.

I will channel the grace of the stars,

the strength of the Dirty Clan, the honor of Thierry!

I can feel their lessons

coursing through my body already!

Hwa cha cha cha cha!

Ha-ha!

Whoa, cha cha cha cha cha!

Ha-ha! Hate to be on the ret--

-Cha! -Ha-ha!

Hate to be on the receiving end of that tennis ball!

Now let's practi-i-i...

-Cha! -...ice!

Narrator: "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu"

-Whew. -Whew.

Whew. Ha-ha-ha hoo!

This horny bitch boy loves licking our tennis sweat,

from tennis. Ha-ha!

Now do you feel more comfortable in the sport of tennis?

It used to be my most emotional sport,

and the one I was worst at, but thanks to your pointers...

Whoo! Whoo! Whoo! Whoo!

...I'm ready to take on the gods.

[ Siren wails ]

Planning on taking on more gods, Makasu?

Oh! Who is this mortal?

Bendy Rivers, my nemesis.

Oh!

He's been on my tail for the past decade,

always one step behind me

when I defeat gods and take their treasures.

That's, uh, D-Detective Bendy Rivers,

Interpol Spiritual Crimes Division.

Almost every religion on the planet

has a problem with you, Makasu.

Tell those cucks to get better at sports, then.

I've committed no crime,

other than cream-pieing their daughters...

with sports.

Huh. We'll see about that, Makasu.

But this time, I have you surrounded.

[ Handcuffs click, helicopter blades whirring ]

[ Siren wailing ]

Handcuffs?

Three years ago, Mount Olympus --

you mud-wrestle Zeus and take the ambrosia.

-Aw. -Two years ago, Bethlehem.

You bowl against Jesus Christ and score a perfect game,

leaving his wrists gaping as you snag the stigmata.

Uh...

These certainly are wild accusations, Rivers,

but don't I always tell you to bend it like Beckham

instead of bending your nutty mind

around these crazy conspiracy figures -- figures --

figures -- conspiracy figures -- conspiracy theories?

Speaking of soccer, um, last year,

40 miles outside of Tibet --

-Just drop this shit. -Hmm.

I'm a curious millennial on a long,

worldwide backpacking trip.

My story's not gonna change.

Hmm.

Where do you keep the relics, Makasu?

I know it's you.

Does Interpol ever seem to get upset

at all the money you're wasting...

Hmm.

...trying to arrest a little millennial like me?

Hmm. Hmm-hmm.

Hmm.

[ Fingers clacking ]

They tell me the Incas love tennis, Makasu.

I've heard that's the sport you're the weakest in...

[ Breathing heavily ]

...and the sport you're most emotional about.

Ugh.

Back Pocket Flying Dimension Bear, my racket!

Chirp!

Back Pocket Flying Dimension Bear...

-Chirp! -...my racket!

Chirp!

Oof oof oof oof.

I'm going to stop you this time.

Oof oof oof oof.

I will find all those relics.

Hooah, hooah, hooah, hooah, hooah.

Hooah, hooah, hooah, hooah!

Hooah! Hooah!

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Conk!

Aah! My head was hit with the racket!

Aah!

[ Thud! ]

Baa baa. Baa baa.

Quick! Jump on my llama!

Hooah!

Now I will cut off the llama's legs

so we can fly away.

Baa.

Hi, Sonia my wife, I'm home.

How was your day?

How was yours?Oh, no, what's wrong?

Did something bad happen?

Cristobal told me what happened, Ben.

So, you lost track of that Makasu guy again.

Is that right?

He slippered out?

[ Sighs ] I did.

Hmm.

He tricked me with a flipper slip flip.

And he's gonna stole another god's possession

after beating him in sports.

You're pathetic.

I'm doing everything I can to get him, I swear.

Hmm.

I'm getting closer, but that guy is just unpredictable.

What happened to you?

You are not the detective man I married anymore.

Uh, but -- but -- but -- but -- but -- but -- but...

When I met you, you were known as the brilliant detective,

the brightest in the Spiritual Crime Department.

Every single mythical creature in your homeland,

you stopped them all in their tracks.

You were named The Man Who Caught The Trauco,

the man responsible for bursting

the Caleuche Ghost Boat drug ring.

I still -- Then, you got reassigned by Interpol,

relocating our whole family from Chile

to wherever he might have been,

putting your wife and children's life on pause,

just to get that Makasu.

What have you achieved by now?

But there's still hope! I'm leading the investigation,

and I-I have a hunch where he's --

You know what?

I cannot even digest this humita

I prepared for dinner.

It's getting all cold!

Cold.

Cold like the ice in my heart!

[ Ice clinking ]

Sonia, my almond, please don't...

Ugh!

Okay, I'll sleep in the car!

Honk, honk, honk, honk!

Honk, honk, honk.

Sonia!

I'm walking to the door of our home!

Look, Sonia, it's all right.

I like my humitas cold, actually.

I can just add sugar on top.

Oh, oh!

Pendejo!

Mama, Mama, can we eat the corn?

No! Don't eat that!

I probably didn't cook it right!

Mommy is so bad at cooking corn when she's mad!

Okay, let me see.

[ Crying ]

I'll get Makasu, even if it takes my life.

[ Bleating ]

Ugh. Mwah.

It's beautiful to see you kiss

every part of the animal.

I'm sorry. Hah.

I didn't mean that. I've just -- hah --

I've been challenging gods to sports for so long, and...

no gods have ever helped me.

You're greedy. You covet.

And you're ultimately alone.

I know this. Hah.

But the Incan gods who took me in

back in the late '60s...

Why would you want me to defeat them?

...they're no longer themselves.

God of Tennis: The Incan people are a distant memory

in some ways.

And though stories and blood remain,

humanity evolves genetically and mimetically.

There are new obsessions, new unifiers.

Like Jake Paul, God of 12-year-olds.

Like Jacob Paul. Like porno.

[ Sighs ]

I do not hold a grudge against the people who leave us.

But without followers,

the Incan gods became more and more aberrant --

half themselves, half fractured reflections,

locked in a sort of quasi-sentience.

They need to be freed.

And having me defeat them in tennis

is the only way to free them.

I knew you would --But what about...

you? Hmm?

I haven't even heard of the French pantheon,

and you said that's 'cause the French

completely abandoned their faith.

Why aren't you aberrant and fractured,

garbage clam of confusion?

Don't you think I ask myself that

every goddamn day, mortal?!

By the time "Space Jam" hit theaters,

these Incans who took me in and cared for me

were but shadows of who they once were!

Come... before Interpol returns.

♪♪

Uhhh, uhhh...

Huh?

Chirp!

I'm nervous.

You've taught me so much, God of Tennis,

but still, it is my worst sport. -Yes.

The last time I failed, I was so ashamed.

I played basketball once against the Celtic god Gwydion

for the treasure of the Welsh.

He was an illusionist, a magical trickster.

And using mind tricks, he made me think I was playing tennis.

And I had such PTSD of tennis -- post-tennis stress disorder --

that I had a quinceañera of sadness in my mind,

and I ran away from Wales, never to return,

because of the shame I have felt.

Look at me, here, now.

Imagine the tennis ball is this raclette cheese.

Imagine it oozing through a colander,

or as we said in France, "passoire."

What?

This is the last lesson in tennis I can give you,

until maybe I have to teach you another lesson in tennis.

Narrator: "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu"

We are in Ekeko's domain.

Ekeko.

Smoking is a very bad habit.

But I'm going to eat all these cigarettes whole,

as a good-luck charm and for the nicotine rush.

You never know when you're going to need cigarettes,

even if they are bad for your health.

Babes look pretty cool and badass

when they smoke a cigarette,

but they can give you disease like cold sore.

God of Tennis: Ekeko represents bounty and plenty,

and since he lost himself,

he has let his village go unkempt,

wealth and prosperity sprouting from the ground like weeds.

[ Sniffing ]

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear!

Chirp!Smell this dirt!

Okay.

[ Sniffing ]

Uh...

Oh, he's hungry.

[ Gagging ]

[ Coughing ] Oh-hoy!

Uh... [ Coughs ]

Chirp!

Can it find Ekeko?

Shh! Let it think!

[ Groaning ]

Chirp! Chirp!

He's such a horny bitch boy.

He's a wiggling bitch boy! He knows!

Nyah, nyah! Wet slop, wet slop!

It's saying "wet slop" over and over!

That means it knows where to go.

Wet slop, wet slop.

Quick!

We must follow!

All right, there they go, running through the village.

Whoa, oh, watch out for that pile of cigarettes.

Uh -- Oh, no, is that a dead end?

A dead end?

Damn this overgrowth!

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Don't you remember the horizontal slice you taught me?

Hoo! Time to get, uh, confident Makasu!

Whoa! Power of tennis, tennis!

[ Echoing ] Eclipse plant trim slice horizontal!

Ohhh!

Whew.

Hello!

Aah! A chair?

That's no ordinary chair.

Oooh.That's the Chair Umpire!

Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh. Ah!

Chair Umpire?

Most chairs I've seen don't have faces.

This is a different experience.

[Bleep] me. Reality is out the window.

This chair has a face.

Hey, man, are you a challenger to Ekeko?

I guess I'm gonna have to tell this chair

that I intend to challenge Ekeko.

What a wild story this is!

Hello!

Oh, wow!

Narrator: Ekeko -- E-K-E-K-O.

Ekeko is the Tiwanakan god of abundance and prosperity.

He is often depicted as a small man carrying bags and baskets

loaded with grains, household objects,

and anything that a person may want

or need to live a prosperous life.

One popular legend of Ekeko

begins with a young Aymara girl named Paulita Tintaya.

Paulita worked as a servant in the home

of Doña Josefa Ursula de Rojas Foronda,

wife of brigadier Don Sebastián de Segurola, governor

and army commander of La Paz, Bolivia, and its surroundings.

Local indigenous peoples had recently laid siege

to the city of La Paz

in an act of rebellion against Spanish rule.

Paulita was madly in love

with local servant boy Isidro Choquehuanca,

who was swiftly drafted into the local army.

He left Paulita a small clay figure of Ekeko

as a parting gift.

As the siege dragged on, food and water became scarce.

Many of the villagers went hungry.

Some resorted to eating cats and dogs to avoid starvation.

But in the home of Doña Josefa, Paulita was never hungry.

Miraculously, the small clay figure provided

Paulita with enough dried meat, corn,

and biscuits to feed her host family and survive the siege.

When Doña Josefa asked Paulita

where she obtained these previsions,

Paulita explained to her

that Ekeko had the power to make food appear when needed.

In reality, Isidro had been risking his life

to sneak away from the local army encampment

and bring food to Paulita.

Doña Josefa and the commander

thanked the small clay idol for their good fortune.

After six long months,

the Spanish defeated the indigenous army,

and lifted the siege.

Doña Josefa and the commander, having survived the siege,

gave their blessing to the wedding of Isidro and Paulita

and allowed them to stay in their home as servants.

Doña Josefa and the commander

wished to commemorate the generous gifts

that Ekeko left them during the siege.

The city of La Paz began to host an annual celebration for Ekeko

on January 24th.

Today, Bolivians continue to travel to La Paz each year

to partake in the Alasitas festival.

People buy miniature versions of goods to pin

onto their own Ekekos, in the hopes that they will receive

the real items in the coming year.

Bolivians and other Andean peoples

typically keep these small Ekeko figurines

in a place of honor within their homes.

Modern versions of the Ekeko idol

include a circular opening in his mouth,

in which people can insert cigarettes for his pleasure.

The legend of Ekeko is truly a testament

to the importance of persevering

and maintaining hope in otherwise hopeless times.

Makasu: Huh?!

This is Ekeko.

In the time that he does not need

to present himself to society,

he remains a small wooden miniature, when nobody --

when he -- when no one's looking at him.

And look at his gaping whore mouth!

I'm guessing it means he wants a taste.

He did just eat all those cigarettes,

just a few minutes ago.

Looks like they will come in handy to summon Ekeko!

[ Gagging ]

[ Coughs ]

[ Gagging continues ]

♪♪

[ Shuddering ]

[ Ekeko clears throat ]

Who are you?

Why are you here?

To challenge you to tennis, Ekeko!

Hah, tennis? Tennis!

Ha-ha-ha!

Mr. Brown Doo-Doo Eyes.

This day is truly a gift, then!

Hah! Ha-hee-hee!

Hah!

There are four rules in tennis.

One of them is love.

And if you get that one, then it's a game, set, match.

Now sir!

Oh, serve. Now serve!

Whew.

You seem rather confident in our match, Ekeko.

Hopefully, he doesn't know tennis is my rustiest sport

and it makes me emotional.

Confident? Why is that?

You don't seem to be holding a racket.

Oh-ho-ho-ho-ho!

He doesn't have a racket, he says.

Do I have gifts for you --

gifts of things you haven't even seen yet.

Heh-heh-heh heh heh. Oh!

Hyah! Whoa-ho-ho-ho!

Whoa-whoa-whoa-ho-ho!

What?! Love-15!

Damn, I thought he had no rackets.

Turns out, his rackets were all in his baskets.

What do I do?

I didn't expect him to have baskets full of rackets.

With this magic of baskets and rackets,

I doubt I can hack it.

But, wait, have I cracked it?

A poem by me, right now.

Nice trick, Ekeko.

But I believe you left an opening in your weak spot.

Precise serve dagger!

Yes!

Love-30!

I should have known his bags of grain

were actually full of tennis balls.

He has thought of everything.

Falling victim to my Pit of Infinite Tennis Balls bag!

What a great gift.

Game point!

Hey, poopy-eyes, why don't you send

your little Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear

my way while -- hee-hee-hee-hee --

you take a little breather.

I've got a little gift for you.

Chirp!

What does he have planned now?

He's already at game point.

Huh? -Chirp!

Ekeko, using your miniature gifts

to taunt your challenger!

What a low blow!

Heh-heh-heh-heh-heh.Wait a second.

Wait a second!

Ekeko: [ To himself ] Huh? What's this loser doing?

Oh, Ekeko?

Please come over here to the net.

Come over here, actually.Oh, uh...

Thank you for this generous gift,

and the gift of a competition with you.

I know you intend this to be an omen of my loss,

a miniature version of a true gift

you want me to manifest -- that gift being...

both: A T-shirt that reads "Big tennis loser."

Heh-heh-heh. You got it!

I'm not trying to be mean, really.

It's just fun to talk shit when you're winning

at your favorite sport, which mine is tennis.

Ha-ha-ha, Ekeko, I get it.

I always do talk shit.

I always do talk shit at times.

Both: Ha-ha-ha-ha!

God of Tennis: They're laughing together?

What if I said I had a gift for you?

Oooh!

A counter-gift. Ha!

You're trying to trick me, aren't you?

Force me to manifest this counter-gift --

a prophetic vision of me

wearing the "Big tennis loser" shirt

so that you are destined to win.

I have to admit, not a terrible idea.

Thank you for saying...

Uhhh. ...that.

Ha-ha-ha-ha! But you forget,

a counter-gift goes both ways.

And we could go back and forth

forever with this wiping off this little painted face,

changing the face, making this cigarette man me and you

and whatever counter-counter-gifts

we do forever...

until you give up like the big tennis loser you are.

Uhhh, um...

You're right, but you're missing the true secret

of this counter-gift.

Secret?!

Chirp!

In his hand,

this cigarette version of you is holding...

Another miniature!

Wearing another "big tennis loser" T-shirt.

And what's in his hand?

Oh! An even smaller miniature...

Both: Wearing an even smaller T-shirt!

Uh, uh, uh, uh...

Continuing forever, uhhhh...

An infinite amount of miniatures,

a fractal rift of gifts that when your godly instinct

to fulfill this gift even begins to comprehend

the monumental depth of this counter-gift,

your ability to develop a counter-counter-gift

will be halted by your conflicting desires.

A counter-gift infinite-fractal tactic?

What an idea that makes perfect sense the whole time!

No! Hee-hee-hee-hee-hee!

No! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

No-o-o!

I-I can't! Hee-hee-hee-hee-hee.

Must fulfill every...

every... miniature!

Ugh, ughhh!

Oh, oh, ugh, ugh!

Uh, uh, uh, ugh!

Um, um, your manipulative gifts

have sapped me of my power!

Hah! ♪ Doo doo doo-doo-doo

Hah!

Then we are finally on equal footing, god.

My serve, Ekeko.

Narrator: "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu"

♪♪

♪♪

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ Makasu know how to get it -♪ Know how to get it

-♪ Ekeko can't even kick it -♪ Can't even kick it

♪ Everybody know who to go

♪ I put on my clothes, and I go for the go ♪

♪ You don't wanna see me on court ♪♪ See me on court

♪ I keep that thang in my shorts ♪

♪ Thang in my shorts

♪ Look at the drip, come take a sip ♪

♪ I got that Continental grip -♪ Continental grip

♪ Serve, swag, serve, swag

♪ Continental grip

♪ Serve, swag, Continental grip ♪

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ Yeah, swing, hit, ace

♪ I'm out there with all the grace ♪

♪ Makasu takin' no breaks

♪ They can't keep up with the pace ♪

♪ When I go in, I go deep -♪ Deep, deep

♪ Check out my reach, swing ♪

♪ I don't even need no doubles ♪

♪ Me all alone, you still in trouble ♪

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪ I'm-a always keep that thang on me ♪

♪ Swing, swing, swing, swing

♪♪

♪♪

Whoa! Oh!

Holy dang, I went out on a limb there.

You took what I taught you about tennis

and improvised to make it something even greater.

I guess your sport infamy truly is earned.

You ever doubted it?

Woo-oo-oof!

Flying Bear!Chirp!

You're a good Back Pocket Dimension Bear slave.

Now give me kisses because I've told you to.

Chirp! Chirp! Chirp!

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

God of Tennis: Though he is alone and a thief

and also selfish, overly emotional, and obsessive...

Chirp! Ooh!

...he does have a little Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear

who truly is a loyal and obedient servant.

Great job, young man.

Get used to saying that, Chair Umpire,

'cause I'm gonna keep on winning these tennis.

Hey! That's my ass seat!

Fly with me!

This may be your most difficult challenge yet, Makasu.

Whoa! Are you saying I'm mentally challenged?

You're truly the most infamous god-relic-thief sportsman

in the entire world.

But be careful.

Defeating these gods will exact a heavier toll

than you're used to. Huh?

When Ekeko dissolved,

his fading life force mixed with yours.

Makasu: [ To himself ] Mix? Like Mixico?

Like a fiesta cheese blend?

I don't know why it happened.

It's not a normal part of tennis, doing a dissolve mix.

And I'm sure it's not a normal part

of most your sports things.

No, it's not. I'm very confused!

Me too, young man.

But I sensed a little bit of Ekeko is within you.

I'm not sure if anything noticeable will happen,

but slowly parts of these gods will become one with you,

and I'm worried about you keeping ahold of yourself.

Ha-ha-ha-ha. Shouldn't be -- Oh-oh-oh!

Was that laughter -- Ekeko's laughter?

Makasu!

I used Ekeko's bounty to make a fabulous crepe meal!

Wait!

If you waste your life wondering if your laughter

is your own or the laugh of an Incan god you've absorbed

after defeating him in tennis --

ahem -- are you truly living?

Theseus' ship.

Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

Ahhh.

If you continuously fix a boat with new wood

until it's all been replaced,

is it the same boat it once was?

Is a boat with the same design,

made of the same pieces discarded from the older ship

during repair of the original ship,

is that that same ship?

Ha-ha-ha-ha.

Is it the same boat it once was?

It's -- Aw. I sure love boats.

Is a boat with the same design,

made of the pieces discarded from the older boat,

the same boat that it knew that it could've been one time

when it was being built by the guy

that was building the boat?

I can't keep me

unless I embrace the me I might also become.

Forget everything you ever knew about boats, okay?

This tennis is deadly.

Trust no one.

Not even my Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear?

♪♪

Hey, I'm the Chair Umpire from the anime you're watching,

and I think it's important for you to learn, uh,

a couple pointers 'bout tennis.

Horizontal bobbing can really do damage on your neck,

if you know what I mean.

Come with me.

I've got, uh, important shots that you'll need to understand,

uh, and view, to further appreciate

the volleys that we'll be appreciating

and seeing in Makasu's g-greatest adventure tonight.

This one's called...

This one's called...

This one's called...

Aah!

Some people choose to play tennis on their own,

fashioning a small ball thrower at the other side of the court.

This works with automation and gas.

This one's called...

Notice the thwack.

Wow!

Look at that tennis ball soar.

Truly like a bird of paradise.

It does bong.

This is why tennis.

Here's some disgusting questions.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[ Pop! ]

Tennis.

Narrator: Fresh from his defeat of Ekeko,

Makasu is led by the God of Tennis

to their next opponent, the Water Goddess Mama Qucha.

But can Makasu resist the temptation

to eat the Lake Titicaca tricky koan.

Tune in next week for "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu,"

Chapter 2, "Second Set."

♪♪

♪♪

Makasu is the best sportsman of all time,

except when it comes to tennis!

And now Makasu has to become the best tennis sportsman ever!

Makasu is ready for action with his action racket!

I have emotional memories about rackets!

And what's that in his Back Pocket Dimension pocket?

Why, it's Flying Bear!

I'm the God of Tennis, here to monologue!

Never let exposition of playtime go unheard again,

with the God of Tennis and his monologging action!

It is I, the God of Tennis.

As the God of Tennis, I know three things about tennis.

One, the ball is green.

Two, if you hit the ball with a racket, you can win points.

Three, if you win enough points,

you'll win the entire game of tennis.

Tennis is a racket sport

that can be played individually against single players.

Each player has a racket.

Narrator: Why, it's Bendy Rivers,

now with extra face-shaming action

to help deal with all his horrible attempts at life.

I failed again. I'm a failure.

I can't do anything right.

My wife hates me.

It's Chair Umpire!

It's a chair, who's also, in addition, an umpire!

Arr, I'm a chair!

With special chair attributes, imagine the possibilities.

I guess I could... sit on it?

Chair Umpire!

You'll never defeat me with my infinite gifts

in my baskets, Makasu.

Will the infinite gifts inside of Ekeko's many,

many baskets spell the end of Makasu's journey

to be the best sportsman?

Anything is possible with "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu"

play-action toys.

[ Laughing ] [ Chirping ]

Ha-ha, ha ha.

Whoa. Ha-ha, ha-ha.

Who knew on our journey that we would go to the beach?

Yeah.

Sand! Yes!

It is on our way to our next challenger,

who was found deep in the sea.

Oh, wow.Makasu: Sounds a little spooky to me.

♪♪

Let me go to the cocktail lounge.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Um, three pisco sours.

That's 30 Sol.

Okay.

Sol is the money of Peru.

Uh, oh, okay. Uh, just give me a second.

I gotta find it in my God purse.

Okay, here's our drinks!

Pisco sours, the national drink of Peru!

Wow, native flavors!

God of Tennis, I'm making an ass out of the sand.

It's called the sand ass.

Chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp.

Oh, yeah, that's right. I'm using lotion to tan my ass dark brown.

So when I can guess in the sand,

it's my ass or the sand ass making fun in this adventure!

Ohh.

Uh... Huh?

I'm peeing in the water. [ Sighs ]

Ohh. He's peeing.

Chirp.

Ha ha ha! Your flying bear wants to drink my pee water.

I hope we have lots of time during this journey

to do friend activities like this one.

You better not be doing this. Seriously?

Missing your son's 8th grade graduation ceremony?

What? Don't you want me to catch this guy?

A real husband would be able to balance family and his job.

Real husband? I -- I hate these gender roles.

Why don't you get a job?I do have a job.

I make more money than you and still have to come home

and put in emotional labor for your failures

and your needs for your goofy career I once found charming.

Is this why we don't do sex anymore?

Yep! That's why we don't do sex anymore.

Ha ha ha! Now I'm burying myself!

Sweet walnut, hold on, he's entering my trap!

But your son![ Beep ]

Bendy Rivers: Buried in the sand is an elaborate

bubble-making mechanism that will trap him in the sky!

Ha ha ha ha!

♪♪

Oh, my God! I've been trapped!

[ Slurps ]

[ Swallows ] Ahh.

Pretty good pisco sour.

I'm not, like, a big booze drinker.

I don't really drink to get drunk.

I mostly drink, uh, just to fit in.

I don't really hang out with people.

I feel fat now.

I'm gonna put my clothes back on.

[ Waves crashing ]

Chirp!

Mm, mm!

Chirp, mm, chirp, chirp, mm, mm, chirp!

Mm, mm, chirp, chirp!

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear!

This bubble trouble might be how our adventure comes to an end!

I've got you now!

You, uh -- y-you can't do any escaping now!

Wow, this [bleep] idiot sure wants to capture me.

Uh...

Chirp, chirp, chirp, uh-huh.

You disgusting little bitch boy, whoo! You're right, though.

You could do a handcuff sex role-play using those tools.

BDSM. BDSM. B-B-B-B-BD--

Makasu, you are under INTERPOL spiritual arrest

for the injury of multiple deities

as well as the theft of many sacred relics

and mythological items!

I can't let him catch me and learn

about my back-pocket dimension. Dang.

Relics that include Khanda, the Buddhist and Hindu sword

that cuts through ignorance with wisdom,

Nábrók, the Icelandic death underpants

made from dead man's skin and which is capable

of producing an endless supply of money,

some penis statue from somewhere I don't even know that one.

I feel like people from religions

and all over the world make big penis statues, right?

I-I don't know the significance of the penis statue.

[ Helicopter blades whirring ]

As well as Skidbladnir, the best of all the Viking Ships.

Skidbladnir?! Winky face!

Quick, Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear. Chirp?

Go into my back pocket dimension and grab me Skidbladnir!

Hmm. Chirp! Hmm, hmm. Ahh.

Skidbladnir?!

Ahh! Wait, please!

It's my 8th grader's graduation today and --

Gust Lob Force Stroke!

Aaaahhhh!

Aaahhhh!

Aaahhhh!

♪♪

[ Waves crashing ]

Ooh. Ooh.

It's a good thing you popped his bubble!

Blah, blah, blah. Who cares?

Sonia, I've got some not so great news.

Oh, my God!He used his magical flying Viking boat

to destroy my bubble trap and -- Hold on.

Your son is here. He has something to say.

Dad, I hate you for missing my 8th grade graduation.

Think about it.

Hmm.

Come. We must tube with these inner tubes

to continue on our journey.

Inner tube -- kind of like my colon!

Actually, the colon is a punctuation mark

used to precede a list of items --

marbles, wooden floor, marble shooters, gambling hens.

This is what you would need in a list of marbles, battles, colon.

Sometimes, God of Tennis, you come off like you're full of shit.

He doesn't trust me, but why?

Just like my colon! Ha ha ha ha!

Man. Bitch, let's go tubing.

♪♪

[ Both slurping ]

But also, the colon is actually a name for the large intestine,

or large bowel, and poop travels through that.

That's what I meant earlier by tube and colon.

Do you get that, God of Tennis?

I'm always thrown off by homophones.

♪♪

[ Dialing ]

It's just, like, personally offensive to me

because, like, you haven't cast me in anything that you've done.

No, it's like, come in here and be this super gay phone.

Now, this is some homophobic word play.

♪♪

It's like not --I prefer playing with my ass!

You think you're so funny

because you're just going to make this weird pun.

Hey, there, guys. It's me, Maxime Simonet.

I'm the creator of the animation story you're watching,

and I just wanted to talk to you guys

about what I like to do comedically,

which sometimes is justified puns.

Homophone, as we've seen,

is this little effeminate phone is what I wrote in the script.

But, you know, clearly, it's a gay phone,

and I know it's not the most politically correct,

but I thought, like, putting -- Taking the word homophone

and then making a homosexual phone

was kind of a fantastical little way of

just putting things together, making a little funny world

to -- You know, imagination is really important.

And, in fact, the whole title of this piece,

Gemmusetto Machu Picchu: "Game Set Match"

translated into Japanese is actually, like,

from what I can tell on Google Translate, is Gemmusetto Machu.

And Machu Picchu, of course, the Incan landmark.

Tennis -- game, set, match.

This project is just justifying all those three puzzle pieces together.

The title came first.

I had a friend who told me, "Oh, Max,

where do you get off making a project

that's using, like, a Japanese art style,

the culture of South America?"

that no -- in now way belongs to me or represents me.

And tennis I don't even know about.

I just want to say, like,

I don't think this is like the movie "Mulan,"

where I'm, like, showing what I think China is like.

You know, this isn't a real representation of anything.

It's kind of just a collage, artistic little fantasy world

we can get indulged in, and it's my epic piece.

It's a life-defining creative piece of mine,

and, in the end, I think I'm going to get rid of the joke

with the gay phone

that we just had with the gay phone.

Shit, I'm drooling again.

[ Slurps ]

See, a lot of this is making sense now to me

because the Lake Titicaca Tricky Colon,

I always wondering why isn't it shaped like two dots

but it's named after the colon in the body.

The Trickery Colon?

Yes, a lake-dwelling underwater monster

that looks like a big fleshy tube.

A deadly beast.

Whoa! The tricky colon!

Oh, my God!

♪♪

God of Tennis, I'm getting queasy!

[ Gags ]

[ Belches ]

There, there. Surely it's getting tired.

Youch! I'm being squished!

Please use your tennis magic

to zap us out of here to someplace.

My powers are useless at sea for reasons too arbitrary to name.

Only a sea deity can help us now,

and I doubt Mama Cocha is on our side,

seeing as she's most likely heard a word of Ekeko's doe-fuh.

That's it! We need Diktynna!

Diktynna?Cretan Goddess of Nets!

Ancient fisher boys, sailors, and fisher boys

drew from her power.

You're not friends with the nets god lady?

Gods don't just all hang out as friends, you know.

Well, lucky for us, when I stormed the Greek Isles

and defeated all of their gods in the game of foosball,

the table sport, I managed to concentrate

all of Diktynna's essence into this beaker!

[ Groans ]

I summon the spirit of Diktynna!

[ Echoing ] Pop inside me, Dikky T's!

I am your vessel!

♪♪

Aah! Oh!

God of Tenni-i-i-i-i-i...

Makasu-u-u-u-u! ...i-i-s!

[ Groans ]

[ Groaning ]

[ Sighs ]

Can you believe what I just did? How I transformed?

That was like Tetsuo from "Akira" the film.

Yeah, whatever, babe.

Poor creature.

Tricky Colon is far afield from its freshwater home.

Whoa! Tastes like meringue!

Like sugary egg whites.

Whoa! Like sweet sperm. Whoa!

Makasu, stop that!

You will anger Mama Cocha even more!

Hmm. Five major rivers empty into Titicaca.

None of them reach the sea.

This means Tricky Colon emerged from the waters,

scrambled down the Andes, crossed highways and railroads,

braved the Thicket of Hard Plastic Things,

all to battle us.

There are forces that -- Makasu!

I told you not to eat the colon.

Why do you always eat the colon?

Mmm. Me and you are a team, tummy.

Makasu, as I feared, you have angered Mama Cocha.

We need to go below deck.

I ate the entire tricky colon, and I feel sick.

So, actually, I feel like I need to sit down more.

Okay? Makasu.

Sorry. Makasu.

Okay? Makasu!

Whoa! Whoa whoa!

Whoa! Whoa-ho-ho!

Whoa! Ooh-hoo!

Makasu!

[ Groaning ]

My word,

the tricky colon is expanding from his insides!

Woop. Woop. Woop. Woop.

Mmm.

The beast has completely filled most of his cavities.

He's gonna -- Whoa!

[ Groaning ]

Makasu, you must purge!

Purge!

No! Don't shake your head! You must purge!

Chirp.

Hmm, chirp. Chirp!

Ugh, ugh, ugh. Ugh!

[ Coin jingles ]

Boom.

[ Regurgitating ]

[ Laughs ]

I've got you. I've got you.

Both: We've got us.

♪ There's no other way to say

♪ I'd hold you till the end of days ♪

♪ When rights are wrong ♪ And songs are called

♪ We'll spin and hold

Oh, wow. I'm dying.

I'm on the ground now, trying to flop.

Oh, and I -- I can't swim...

...because I'm on the ground.

Oh, dang! What? There's a hole in this water!

This is terrible!Yeah, same here.

Sure is a shitty time to be one of us fish.

Shoot.

Guys, me, too!

Shoot!

♪♪

All: ♪ We are dead fish on the ground ♪

♪ We've come out the water, and now we're drowned ♪

Shoot!

Me, too, guys.

I guess...this is where.... my next challenge

is...going to be.

Hello!

♪♪

Aah!

It is me again, your favorite chair umpire,

The Chair Umpire!

Chair Umpire? Aah!

Where is Mama Cocha? She brought us down here,

nearly killing Makasu in the process!

Well, I'm gonna summon the tennis court now!

[ Chanting ]

♪♪

Oh, wow! Chair Umpire is very talented, for a chair!

[ Chants ]

Mama Cocha!

Hi!

Hmm.

♪♪

Mama Cocha --

M.A.M.A.

C.O.C.H.A.

or M.A.M.A.

Q.U.C.H.A.

In the northern stretches of the Republic of Peru,

the Inca people worshipped many gods

that shared common functions

across different regions of the civilization.

At a certain point, however, they reached an agreement

and designated a name for each god.

In this unification process,

Mama Cocha was created from all the deities

who represented various aspects of water.

She's said to be the wife of Viracocha,

who was the creator deity

and once the most important god in the Inca pantheon

before he was demoted, in a way, by emperor Pachacuti,

who declared Viracocha and Mama Cocha's son,

Inti, the Sun God, was the most important.

Representing a primary element,

Mama Cocha was a very important goddess,

especially venerated along coastal areas

in Peru by fishermen.

She was said to calm the water and create opportunities

for the best fishing conditions by averting storms,

leading to her veneration

as a protector of fisherman and sailors.

In the cases of aquatic disasters,

she was said to offer relief.

If a tsunami or a storm or flood

were to hurt a group of people,

Mama Cocha cared for them and helped them recover.

Some regions of the empire believed

that she was the goddess for all bodies of water --

rivers, lakes, even water courses

and reservoirs that were human-made.

The beliefs surrounding Mama Cocha

and other water-related deities

suggest that the Incans understood the basics

of the hydrological cycle.

They understood that the rain came from

already present bodies of water

and that the sea fueled the rain,

which would then fall all over the ground.

Water being scarce in the Andes mountains

required the Incans and Pre-Inca civilizations

to construct reservoirs and canals for irrigation.

Transporting water from springs

and places that experienced higher volumes of rain

to areas with low rainfall

in order to irrigate the soil and maintain livestock

was vital to the preservation of their people.

The Spanish colonists who conquered the Inca

noted that they had many complex canals and aqueducts

to bring water from high elevation areas

to lower, agricultural settlements.

The sanctity of water and its connection to the spiritual

shows that the Inca understood the ecological factors

that sustain and create life.

Without rain, they have no working farms.

Without Mama Cocha calming the sea, they have no fish.

Through military might, they may have conquered

the areas around the Andes,

but with water, they sustain themselves.

♪♪

[ Growling ]

I felt your foreign stink on my sea

the minute your dirty feet dipped in.

You got a problem with my feet smells?

No!

[ Choking ]

I've got a problem with you fishing beasts without my blessing!

Mama Cocha, the Tricky Colon attacked us first!

And it doesn't even belong in these waters!

Imposter! Imposter!

The Tricky Colon was suffering at your hands!

What? Have you been summoning

all manner of creatures into the sea?

My babies! They must be here and ready!

[ Screeches ]

Even indulging your challenge to me

has killed these poor babies.

Babies! Babies! Babies! Babies! Babies! Babies! Babies! Babies!

But you will not survive a tennis match with me, intruder!

Hmm, Hmm!

The water here will drown you in the sorrow of my sea children!

Hmph!

♪♪

I am the water.

And it is me!

You're full of me!

And it is all the same,

from liquid lining your insides

to the craters and puddles on land.

And you dare to tell me what my children,

what the Tricky Colon, where he should live?

You don't know water!

Hmm.

[ Water dripping ]

I'm very wet now and very disappointed.

You are even madder than Ekeko was.

My friends, my new family - broken.

Broken?

♪♪

A close-up sneer? What could she be planning?

♪♪

Hyah![ Buzzer sounds ]

Huh? 15-love.

Huh? Damn it!

Makasu -- her balls are made of pure water,

and your racket doesn't have the power to return her serves!

That makes no sense okay, man? What -- Damn it!

Okay, that makes no sense. All right? Hello?

I don't understand what you're saying.

Just serve the ball again.

You can't trick me, I got tennis.

Hee-hee.

[ Grunts ]

Hyah!

What? 30-love!

But how the hell did this just do it? But how?

I literally just told you what's happening.

I know, but it -- You know, I've just --

I don't know, I've seen a lot of crazy stuff, okay?

God of Tennis, but water balls going through rackets?

That's not regulation, man.

Eeh, eeh, ahh.

All these, you know, what?

What is happening? Time out!

Aah!

Could I go to the break room and get a cold drink?

[ Slurping ]

[ Swallows ] Mmm.

♪♪

Ah.

♪♪

All right, Mama Cocha. I'm ready for your serve now.

You sure? [ Laughs ]

You're probably gonna lose.

God of Tennis: Makasu looks a little different after he's spent the time

in the break room getting a cold drink.

What is he up to?

30-love was the score of points, was it not?

30-love, intruder.

Why don't you test that theory of yours,

where you win? Errr!

♪♪

Ah, tennis hit!

Huh?[ Buzzer sounds ]

30-15!How did you --

Yeah! Huah! Ugh.

Ugh, yeah, ugh, huah.

Simple -- In the break room, I wasn't just drinking cold drink.

I was doing way more, Mama Coach!

I was also preparing my racket!

I couldn't return any ball

that just goes through the racket's mesh.

I had to figure out how to fill up those little holes!

So I used ice cubes from the ice maker in the freezer.

Ice cubes, little 3-dimensional squares of frozen water

fitting perfectly into the holes of the racket's mesh.

But that's not all.

There was a secret to putting my ice cubes in the racket.

Hmm! That's right.

He couldn't just leave the cubes in his racket.

He would've had to keep the racket

completely vertical to hold them in there.

Any rotational movement would have had them

falling out on the ground.

So, I went with my gut.

Makasu, you must purge! Purge!

Whuuu whu whuu whuuu whaauh!

No! Don't shake your head! You must purge!

I couldn't purge easily then, no,

not until my Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear

went into my throat and triggered my gag reflex.

But since then, I have not been able to stop

feeling like I've got to puke!Whuuh!

So I covered up the racket with vomited-up pisco sours

and then left it in the freezer to hold the ice cubes in.

And that's why I was gone for a whole hour and 23 minutes.

A whole hour and 16 minutes.

That's why I was gone so long.

But now it holds all the ice cubes in.

Neat trick, huh? Yes!

Ice Cube glistening Peruvian

racket trick technique cocktail vomit! Yes!

Solid enough to hit balls of water back!

Aah, you conniving foreigner!

[ Growls ]

My babies!

Slap!

Bone-zo!

Slap that animal!

Aah!

[ Gurgling ]

Blech, now, this makes me --

Chyron: Game, set, match.

♪♪

[ Siren wailing ]

♪♪

The Kali Yuga is, like, so totally bogus,

but I guess I'll like, amenitize the eschaton, whatever.

Oh, thanks PopSoppler for the extra bits.

Cutie -- he says, "Gangroin, you're gorgeous.

Please amenitize my pleasure fruit."

That's very cute.

They call me the prince of trouble. I'm the prince of trouble.

Police Scanner: A thick demon is spoiling the Possinop Metrop'.

We need an &658.3 on the square eunuch.

Roger, dodger.

We got a trip six on the upper-up-side.

Heading over now.

I like it when you talk like a cop.

The wind is in my face. Ugh! We're close.

I feel the moist.

I'm chewin' on some collagen.

Ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh, ugh!

[ Feedback ]

Pardon me, miss. Hello?

[ Clears throat ] Pwease, mommy, respond uwu.

All right, girls and boys.

I'm going to equip male nipple nipple.

Computer: Male nipple activating.

♪♪

My, my, you little freaks love male nipple nipple today.

Oh, what's this?

MopKlopperDoppo tips with the message,

"You're the ray of light in my life."

Male nipple throb town.

Aah!

No! I, uh -- ugh!

Oh, you stinker, you friggin' stinker.

I am gonna ring you up like mayonnaise, shawty.

Stop tamperin' with evidence!Oh!

Aah! No! No!

You're a loose floppabopbot.

Of course you'd resort to this garbage.

Aah!Keep singing your ceiling's praises, honey.

I'm not moving! Please!

In regards to the OverChurch's ordinance,

Sunlight-D is not to be given without a prescription.

Online solicitation of the seduced

to widen their light dosage is against the law.

And who got a nonorganic like you a cache of D anyways?

Hold up, she -- Aah!

What the...?

Gangrene: Whoever thought a city in the Pacific Ocean was a good idea?

You'd figure if anyone had played "Bioshock," they'd get that.

But maybe the lens of that video game

is more of an anti-objectivist stance

about the dangers of no regulation

and not about the fatal truth.

Our utopia, our scientific haven,

a world for organics and nonorganics

who lived outside conventional lines,

it lacked what one could only describe,

metaphorically, as hope, light.

The sea darkness made man sick.

And the OverChurch controlled the light

and...

Uh...

This sucks.

I vow to never use my throat again

in this whole journey for anything.

Oh.

What is this landmark?

This world, the Under Andes,

is cosmically linked with the overworld of mortals.

It is an in-between state taking us

to the lower Ukhu Pacha.

Cool.

But what is this landmark!?

The Amaru, a beast said to live underground,

rips through the Under Andes

as it finds its way to its subterranean home in your world.

But what is this landmark?

The Amaru --

But what is this landmark?

The gateway of the sun.

You can say it's an interplanetary sister

of the same monument found in Bolivia.

Wow, the Under Andes are a sort of mirror South America.

Hmm, that's very funny.

Cool.

But what is this --

It's crazy how much the space in between space matters.

Truly more than meets the eyes.

Ha ha ha. You got that from Megaman.

Megam-- no, no, Megaman is the blue guy.

I mean the one with the cars,

the Japanese Sex Cars -- Japanese sex --

ah, Japanese sex cars.

Japanese sex vehic--

As we go forth, time and space

are going to make less and less sense,

in the traditional ways you're used to.

Autobang. Something like automobiles.

Transforming automobile friends?

Are you even listening to me, Makasu?

Mama Cocha almost ripped you to shreds in the water vortex

and then tricked you with liquid tennis balls!

I'm just trying to prepare you because I care.

Bitch, I know you care. Listen, bitch.

The one thing I've learned from my career

as doing what I do, which is playing against gods in sports,

is that you can't expect anything.

This status quo of yours of fantastical nonsense

underneath South America may be all hoodie doodie to you,

but you wouldn't survive a goose-[bleep] minute

as a mortal.

You know I've been through tough times, you know this.

You know it, that I have,

but there's also things you don't know.

And sure, Mama Cocha's water balls

might have freaked me out for a second

and I had a little breakdown there,

but at least I know from all the wild, wild worlds

and worlds in between worlds and all the things out there

that I'm supposed to be thrown off.

If I'm gonna do this, I'm going to be thrown off.

I am listening, God of Tennis, but I'll figure it out.

I always do.

Ah, God. Water?!

Don't worry about me, please.

His confidence in the face of all of this,

the balancing of his fears, conquering sad memories

and sticking to what he started,

making his decision to take this on,

despite everything that told him he wasn't good enough at tennis,

despite the memories of his grandfather...

...Pencil eraser there, like some --

do we have any, like, little nubs?

...he is a truly force to be afraid of.

Bleat!

Spit, spit, bleat!

Chirp!

Okay, your new challenger is Urcuchillay!

This guy!

Urcuchillay.

U.R.C.U.C.H.I.L.L.A.Y.

Urcuchillay was the tutelary deity of Inca herders

and was believed to be a llama who watched over all animals.

He was seen to be essential for the well-being

and reproduction of their herds.

The Inca believed constellations

were special patrons of certain animals or activities,

and thus, stellar deities were a commonly-held belief.

Urcuchillay was the constellation

western astronomers know as Lyra.

Ancient Egyptians would represent the constellation as a vulture

and, in India, as an eagle or a vulture.

Seeing as the Inca had no cows, sheep, chickens, or goats,

their only domesticated animals were alpacas,

guinea pigs, and llamas.

Llamas were especially important,

as they provided clothing, food,

and were also their beasts of burden.

Additionally, they were sacrificed in very large numbers

as tribute to the gods.

The llama was the most popular Andean camelid

in stories and rituals

due to its extensive presence across the Andes and lower areas

compared to the alpaca, guanaco, and vicuña.

It also was the only camelid useful as a work animal

or to carry heavy loads and a source of edible meat,

as well as having manure that served as fertilizer.

Despite being replaced over time by cows and donkeys

for meat and transport respectively,

the llama has continued to be used for long trips in the Andes

and is a symbol of Peruvian identity.

It made it possible to take fish from the ocean

up to emperors higher in the mountains.

The llama was so vital to the Inca,

one of the most important dark cloud constellations

of their culture was the yacana, the llama.

It rises above Cuzco, the capital city,

in November and consists of two llamas,

a mother and a baby suckling at her breast.

One of the eyes of the mother llama is Alpha Centauri,

the third brightest star in the night sky.

And the other is Beta Centauri.

Two bright star systems among the dark cloud

constellation body of the mother llama.

Llamas mate with the female in a lying-down position,

called a kush position.

They also mate for up to 45 minutes.

The females are induced ovulators,

which is when an animal ovulates due to external stimuli

during or just prior to mating.

The female doesn't produce eggs cyclically,

rather, does so when mated with

and is usually fertilized on the first try.

Being such a profoundly important beast of burden

and cultural icon,

it's no wonder there was reverence to a deity

that was said to ensure the safety and propagation

of a llama herd.

Urcuchillay.

♪♪

Bleat. Spit.

Bleat, spit, spit, spit, bleat, spit on the ground.

Man, I'm used to gods hating me,

but this Urcuchillay guy seems real pissed!

Yes. I didn't know him well, and he was always weird,

and he just talks like that.

Bleat, spit, bleat, spit, spit, spit, bleat!

Bleat!

Quick! Jump on my llama!Huaah!

Now I will cut off the llama's legs so we can fly away.

♪♪

♪♪

Bleat, bleat, bleat,

spit, spit, bleat, spit.

Bleat, spit, spit, bleat.

Bleat, bleat, bleat.

Slap that animal!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Bleat, bleat, bleat, spit, spit, bleat.

Bleat, spit.

Bleat, bleat, spit, bleat, spit.

Bleat, spit, spit, spit, bleat, bleat, bleat.

Bleat, spit, bleat, bleat, bleat, spit.

Spit, bleat, bleat, spit, spit, spit, bleat.

Uh...spit, bleat.

Spit, spit, spit, spit, bleat.

Bleat, spit, spit, bleat, bleat, spit, spit.

You know what? I'm pretty sure I don't understand Llama language from this.

Chirp, chirp, chirp.[ Laughter ]

Chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp. Oh, boy.

You're so right about how much of an idiot

this llama guy sounds like...

Chirp! Chirp, chirp....when -- when he's saying this.

Chirp.I've never heard someone deconstruct every aspect

of how much of an idiot Urcuchillay the llama herd god

sounds like when he talks,

but your little Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear servant

sure has some biting insights. [ Chuckles ]

[ Snorts ] Bleat, bleat.

Hmm.

♪♪

Bleat.

Wow. Got to...

jump! Jump!

Ha ha, jumping!

[ Coughing ]

I guess he's ready to challe--

I'm raw because I puked a lot.

And also, I pulled cigarettes out of my stomach.

[ Gagging ]

Yeah! Wait!

Who knows what he's got up those weird footy hoofies?

True, his two strange feet are weird.

♪ Damn, what?

♪ Oh, my God

♪ Lord help us

♪ Oh, my God

♪ Okay, oh, my God

♪ Yeah, praise our lord

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

♪ Help, yeah, fault, help

[ Indistinct singing ]

♪♪

♪ I pull up with my tennis racket ♪

♪ I make that racket, yeah

♪ Pull up in that muh

♪ I got that pack, yeah

♪ Everybody wanna know

♪ I did it, now

♪ Everybody wanna know

♪ I did it, now

♪ Venus, Serena, I got my penis on my necklace ♪

[ Indistinct singing ]

♪♪

♪ Everybody know

♪ Here we go

♪ Lean stroke

♪ Yeah, lean stroke

♪ Yeah, lean stroke

♪ Yeah, lean stroke

♪ Ooh, yeah, lean stroke

♪ Cool, lean stroke

♪ Lean stoke, yeah

♪ Hit it with that

♪ I need it, unh

♪ I need that thang like my...

♪ Hey, yeah

[ Indistinct singing ]

♪ Yeah

♪ Yeah, yeah

[ Indistinct singing ]

♪ Meow, meow

[ Indistinct singing ]

[ Indistinct singing ]

[ Rumbling, monkey hooting ]

[ Indistinct singing ]

♪ Stroke, lean, hit, what?

♪ Stroke, lean, hit, what?

♪ Damn

♪ Oh, my God

♪ Lord help us

♪ Oh, my God, okay

♪ Oh, my God, praise our lord

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪

♪ Help, yeah, fault, help, help, yeah, fault ♪

[ Indistinct singing ]

♪ Lean stroke, unh

♪ Lean stroke

♪ Back and fault, back and fault ♪

♪ I pull up with my tennis racket ♪

♪ I make that racket, yeah

♪ Pull up in that muh

♪ I got that pack, yeah

♪ Everybody wanna know

♪ I did it, now

♪ Everybody wanna know

♪ I did it, now

♪ Venus, Serena, I got my penis on my necklace ♪

♪ Everybody think I'm so jealous ♪

♪♪

♪♪

[ Door creaks ]

♪ I need ya, I need that thang like my ♪

♪ Hey

♪ Yeah

[ Indistinct singing ]

♪♪

♪ Meow, meow

♪ Cat meow

♪ Throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it ♪

♪ Throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it ♪

♪ Throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it ♪

♪ Throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it ♪

♪ Throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it ♪

♪ Throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it ♪

♪ Throw it, throw it, throw it, throw it ♪

♪ Throw it, throw it, stroke, lean, hit, what? ♪

♪ Stroke, lean, hit, what?

Makasu confronts Suppay, the God of Death,

deep in the Inca underworld.

But will our hero be lulled into a guilt-ridden complacency

by visions of the deaths he caused in high school

and memories of his affair with the Italian bocce-ball teacher?

Tune in next tennis time for "Gemmusetto Machu Picchu,

Chapter 3: Back Spin."

♪♪

♪♪

Narrator: Uh-oh. It looks like Makasu's triumphant ride

to the tennis mythos isn't going to be as easy as he thought

with this brand-new line of "Gemmusetto Machu Picchu" action figures.

Why, it's none other than water witch herself, Mama Cocha.

Use her squirting powers to douse Makasu with water,

or agua, as they say in most Latin American countries.

Whoa! It looks like Makasu is ready to shoot the curl

with the new surfer Makasu action figure.

Let's hang 10, dudes.

It comes with its very own surfboard and metal detector.

[ Metal detector chirping ]

My first dad lives under the sand.

Don't look now, but it's that trickster,

the Lake Titicaca Tricky Colon.

I'll pass using my sphincter, Makasu.

This slimy, disgusting abomination

is more than just the organ that reabsorbs fluid

and processes the waste product from the body

and prepares it for elimination through your rectum.

Ahoy matey, it's Skidbladnir,

the fiercest of the Viking ships.

This llama is all business

and will bring Makasu to his knees

with his "standing on all four legs"

or "just on his back legs" action.

Wowa-zowa! Barfing Makasu action figure.

[ Imitates Makasu vomiting ]

♪♪

Wowa Zowa!

Smells and tastes like actual vomit.

[ Sniffs ]

[ Sniffs ]

Gemmusetto Machu Picchu action figures and play sets --

the only action figures you'll ever need.

[ Beeping ]

Huh? Shoot. Bad news.

A tracking device in South America is now...

offline. Aah!

Ah, shit, piss.

I just ruined a computer.

The facts are this.

Agent Bendy Rivers is here

floating in the middle of the ocean.

But where's his target --

the relic thief, the God-Killer, the sportsman...

Both: Makasu!

[ Singing in Japanese ]

That's what I'm trying to tell you.

His tracking device is offline.

Did you check all the screens?

Yes. Even the small ones.

But that's impossible!

Agent Bendy Rivers, he def--

Hello.

-Agent Bendy Rivers? -Yes.

Agent Bendy Rivers,

you did put the tracking chip upon Makasu

when you had him in custody, right?

Yes, I -- Before he escaped again, that is.

Yes. [ Mumbling ]

Can't understand a word you're saying.

Yes. Before he got away,

I definitely stuck the devise on him.

What's wrong?

The thing's busted, Rivers.What?!

But I used the thing to track him to the beach.

I got you now.

You -- you -- you can't do an escape now.

Fashioned from tree sap and plankton chromosomes,

this tracking device was meant to be

the ultimate in bio-digital implants.

Him using it by the beach shouldn't have been a problem.

Plankton thrive in the ocean.

It's their natural habitat.

But wait, here, one of the deities

in the Incan pantheon.

Oh, my piss. Yes.

Some sort of god of herds,

a llama who watches over animals.

It's possible on his spiritual rampage,

Makasu has run into this divine beast.

And if he has -- crap in a piss hole.

The plankton...

Both: ...would have had an allergic reaction

to the llama, dander, and hair!

-Aah! -Oh, shoot.

Of course plankton are allergic to llamas.

Why would I choose a plankton chromosomal tracking device

when I knew Makasu was in Peru where there's lots of llamas?

Rivers, I'm beginning to doubt your ability

to handle this investigation.

You've been on this case for a decade, Rivers.

I used to look up to you, you know.

Aw.

Hold it.

I'm getting energy readings off the charts.

Where?! Triangulating.

In a parallel plane of existence

16 layers down...

intersecting with soul tunnels.

It must be the Incan Death Dimension.

Ukhu Pacha, it seems to be called.

Rivers, you may have your man yet.

These signatures match the power levels

exerted by those Chinese stones he stole.

Since our device went offline

while he was here in the under Andes,

you could circumvent the Incan Death Dimension

and possibly intercept him here in this plain of plains.

Yeah, sure, okay, lucky. I'll get right on that.

Now I'm hanging up.

Eventually, everyone disappoints you, even your heroes.

Let's just hope Makasu kills less than three more gods

and Rivers ends his murder theft spree for him,

for us, for the entire universe.

Uhh!

Back Pocket Flying Dimension Bear.

Chirp?

Return the Colored Stones of Nuwa

back to my back pocket dimension.

Chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp, chirp.

It's incredible that you used the powers

of the Chinese elements in those Nuwa Stones

to destroy that crystal wall.

I stole these stones

when I defeated the Jade Emperor

in rugby using elements of fire, earth, water,

and then my two favorite elements, wood and metal.

Because they're -- wood and metal

are hard like a man's boner.

Chirp. Huh?

Ugh. Chirp.

And now, you're saying these crystals

taste like a man's brown Starburst. Wow.

Yes, sour like a man's brown Starburst.

-Wow. -Puh.

Man's boners, man's brown Starbursts.

Truly this is a man's world.

Little mineral demons stick to the walls here,

refining and gathering geodes

buried deep in the walls.

It's the only part of Incan history

buried deep in the walls.

Chirp? Ugh.

Puh. Chirp.

Makasu: Pure baby bear slave.

Hey, let me tell you what you should lick

that tastes very good.

Follow me. Chirp.

[ Panting ]

♪♪

This here floating femur.

Human bones are some of the best bones.

Chirp! Chirp!

I see we're at the final gateway to Ukhu Pacha.

I can tell because it's written here on this...

[echoing] femur.

Doesn't the femur ball look like a mozzarella cheese?

♪♪

The last time I sucked on a mozzarella bone

that hard was when I was having an affair.

Chirp?

Yes, an affair with my Italian bocce ball teacher.

Back in high school when I was a nympho-pansexual.

Ha. That was one of my favorite time...

phases?Ukhu Pacha.

I've always found it beautiful in the most haunting way,

like a very wet abortion.

Bones of ancestors are littered everywhere.

This is truly a bittersweet place.

You know, back in high school,

they used to call my man's brown Starburst "the bone pit".

Which kind of ties all this stuff together.

Chirp, chirp, chirp. Ya!

Chirp, chirp.

Don't you dare call me a horny bitch boy

right now, you freak. Chirp.

You don't get to use those words.

Those are my words.

Hey, sorry, guys, hold on. Uh, one sec.

Uh, it's me, the Chair Umpire, but just wait one sec.

Yes, Papa?

You have wireless reception

in the depths of the inner world?

Wow.

Chair Umpire sure is prepared for a Chair Umpire.

Hey, um, um, I'm on the phone with my papa.

Papa Chair Umpire: [ Speaking native language ]

Land lines at home are a thing of the past.

Right.

You are sweating.

Do you want any petite fours?

I don't have any. Just hold on one minute.

When you're sweating, you get rid of many things.

U, it's like sauna.

And, um, this is, this is --

I like, too. Uh...

We have to wait 'til she gets off the phone.

Hurry.

Shh, shh, shh, shh.

Papa Chair Umpire: Uh, number one,

it's a great, um, exercise.

As a matter of fact, it's not my idea,

but I know for a fact that this is number one.

Cardio number one.

Uh...[speaking native language]

...few days ago.

that he read somewhere that, um,

you can prolong your life, uh, with tennis.

10 years, he -- he read somewhere.

[ Coughs ] I -- I like it

because you can kill another person,

you know, who is -- who is playing with you,

and -- and that's, uh -- that's a pleasure.

You blink -- you blink weird.

Uh, sorry, guys.

Playing doubles...

Yeah.

[ Speaking native language ]

That -- that -- that never, never actually, you know,

with them, it's not -- not a problem.

They're just playing for fun.

Right.

Men actually never play for fun.

Men are so involved in that --

that they get so upset with -- with -- with --

when they lose and so happy when they win

that this is more than sport.

It's like, uh -- like, um -- um --

birthday for -- for -- for a man, you know?

Right. Literally.

Life or death.

Like what? Life or death.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Kind of like this, yes.

I would say, but, uh --

you know, ice cream is sweet.

Why you -- why -- why -- w-- why chocolate?

And there is chocolate ice cream, right?

So it's dangerous. -Yes. For sure.

-Okay. -Alrighty, bye bye, love you.

Love you.

-Bye. -Bye.

Sorry. So sorry about, um,

that phone conversation with my dad.

-I -- Oh, that's fine. -Tennis.

No -- no big deal.

I really apologize about that,

but, anyway, your next opponent is

Supay, the god of death, pronounced "su-pay".

Oh. Oh.

Supay.

[ Ball bouncing ]

Makasu: Four years ago at the ancient Chinese rugby stadium

in the cosmic nether clouds outside of the Leifeng Pagoda

is where I challenged the Jade Emperor to rugby

and got the Nuwa Elemental Stones we learned about

just a little while ago.

This is back when I grew a rat tail out

and I loved that hairdo I had.

Chrip?You're right! Time for tackle!

My rat tail!

-Chrip? -Huh? My head!

Huh! Not so fast!

Yes, but for some reason, I am still alive!

Huh! I guess fung shui reversed my decapitation!

Flying Bear: Chrip?

Makasu: And that's how I defeated the Jade Emperor

and got the Nuwa Stones,

which I used to destroy that crystal wall

on the way to Ukhu Pacha, where I am going to be playing tennis

against the Incan God of Death, Supay!

Supay.

S-U-P-A-Y.

Present in Quechua, Aymara, and Inca mythologies,

Supay held a similar role

to that of the Western concept of the Devil.

He ruled Ukhu Pacha, the lower world,

one of the three realms of the Inca mythological cosmos.

The other two are Hanan Pacha,

a heaven-like celestial world for the gods,

and Kay Pacha, which is the world we live on

or the present time space.

Though the Spanish colonizers used the name Supay

to refer to the Christian devil, it is important to note

that the Andean natives didn't see Supay

as a force to denounce.

Rather their fear of him led to their invoking of his name

and begging not to bring them harm.

Ukhu Pacha itself wasn't an entirely negative concept

and was associated with new life as well as death.

Pachamama, the feminine earth mother,

and harvesting were associated with this aspect of new life.

Disrupting the lower world was seen as a sacred matter,

leading to ceremonies and rites

when humans were to disturb the surface.

For instance, times when the Inca

were to till for potato crops were accompanied

with a host of sacred rituals

in order to pay respect to Ukhu Pacha,

a land of death, new life, of ancestors,

and the potential torment of Supay.

Offerings of food and drink were given to Supay

and his demons in order to ensure

that they would not suffer from hunger or thirst.

This would hopefully lead to Supay acting generously

when interacting with deceased relatives or, if neglected,

could lead to him inflicting punishment

or hurting the family members who had passed.

Capable of evil and destruction

as well as a consummate trickster,

Supay was an ever-present force

representing the duality of good and evil within the world.

Growth, decay, birth, and death,

spiritually linked with contradictions

we see in life itself.

It was even said that when Supay was to feast upon the dead,

he would manifest a divine fire,

giving off both light and heat, the generators of life.

Due to his connection to the underground,

Andean miners find a strong reverence of Supay.

Their offerings to him were not intended

to retain a status quo in these cases,

but rather to ensure the discovery of riches

from hidden treasures in the hills.

A living, white llama is to be sacrificed

and its heart interred in the mines

to gain his good will twice yearly,

an offering to satisfy his voracious appetite

to protect the miners as well as to certify

the encountering of valuable minerals.

♪♪

Yah yah yah yah yah yah yah yah yah.

Yah yah yah yah yah yah yah yah yah.

Sports men.

You've made much progress. Yah.

Using your tennis slaps on all my guys.

You knew I was arriving? Yah.

Of course he did, Makasu.

You've defeated three gods so far,

and their fading spirits must have at least passed

through Supay's domain of death.

Supay, is what he said true?

Yeah.

Damn. I should have known that.

Now I'm embarrassed in front of the Chair Umpire,

the coolest chair I know.

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear.

Listen, I know I slapped you in the face earlier pretty hard

for calling me a horny bitch boy,

but let's be honest here.

I'm the one who calls you a horny bitch boy,

and the fact that you, like, took that from me?

Kind of [bleep] Chirp.

But, for real, I need to ask your opinion on something.

Okay, listen.

Do you think the Chair Umpire thinks I'm stupid?

I didn't know Supay knew we were coming.

Is everyone judging me for that right now?

Chirp, chirp, chirp.

I'd say I'm sorry, but you're being a total "c" word

right now, and I mean the one that I can't say.

[Bleep]

Sportsman, you have come to dispose of me,

much like your Spanish forefathers.

Your artifact seeking ends here.

Oh, no. Don't you dare compare me

to Spanish conquistadors of yore.

Look at me in my big, sexy eyes.

Every tear, every pupil dilation.

I don't have time for your nonsense.

Ugh!

Whatever you do, don't let Supay get to you.

Man, Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear

was being a total [bleep] earlier.

I'm really pissed. Agh.

Why don't you speak your mind with tennis?

Ugh, I'm pissed. Serve at me.

Chirp, chirp, chirp.

Sorries are for Gnarly Charlies and Charles Barkley.

I'm ignoring you for a few minutes,

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear.

All I have is my big, sexy eyes.

And the dances.

Ahh.

[ Pop! ]

Yah.

Ooh. Huh?

Love 15.

My death dances were not good enough?

-Ha ha ha. -Yah!

Love conquers death, Supay.

And -- and that's a metaphor I made up.

Hee-yah!

We all have our metaphors, sportsman.

My dances are a metaphor for life and death

and the boogie-woogie in between, which is sex.

But your dances have caused real death, haven't they?

Sex. Even in your younger days.

Death.

Look at me in my big, sexy eyes.

[ Echoing ] Dance. Supay.

Conquistador. Tennis.

Boogie.

Death. High school.

Teens. Death.

[ Bell rings ]

Bucket: Makasu-senpai, the handsomest and coolest boy

at All Star Supotsu Academy.

I've had a crush on him for years,

but he probably doesn't even know that I exist.

Huh. Uhh.

Oh, no! Watch out!

I'm sorry. I was distracted.

Don't worry about it, Bucket.

I always hit my head against things always every day.

See ya.

You -- you know my name?

Yeah, you silly dummy.

I've known you since we were 6 years old.

Also your name is written on your shorts

for when I forget.

Uhh.

-Hey, Bucket. -Huh?

Bucket. Is everything okay? Huh?

It's not like you to play so poorly.

You seem distracted.

I -- I promise it won't happen again.

I want to do my best.

As long as it doesn't happen tomorrow during the final exam

for shot-put class. Let's all do our...

Both: ...best!

Yeah!

[ Bell rings ]

Hey, Makasu.

I'm really proud of the way you've been throwing

those bocce balls.

Yeah, Mr. Bocce Ball.

You sure know the most about bocce.

It's great to hear your validation

of all my playing with the bocceno.

I love it.

Those little boccenos. They're awesome.

Mr. Bocceno, you sure know the most about everything.

You know, every time I see you, Makasu,

I just forget who I am.

♪♪

[ Mumbling ]

Bucket.

I know we've never spoken or interacted before today,

but I just want you to know, I need you in my life, Bucket.

I need that beautiful body

and, more importantly, your smart brain.

What do you say?

Let's move in together immediately as high schoolers

in the same apartment in love.

My mommy also has a magazine full of vibrators

I can get you. Uh, uh, uh...

Makasu-senpai, yes!

1,000 times, yes!

See you later, Bucket!

Don't make any mistakes tomorrow, you idiot.

Huh.

No. No more distractions.

Father, mother, I won't let you down.

I will do my best to make you proud,

and I will do my best so that Makasu-senpai will love me.

Father?

I am home from school.

Bucket, how was school?

School was fine, father.

Do you need help with tires?

No, Bucket.

Do not soil your shot put fingers

on these old and damaged tires.

I am but a simple tire repairman.

Let me tend to them.

Daddy is almost finished repairing

these broken and damaged tires.

Would you begin preparing dinner?

♪ This is my cooking song

♪ Cooking for Dad every night ♪

Father, dinner is ready.

Daddy is still working.

It's taking longer than I thought.

Please, allow me to help.

No. I couldn't.

Please, save your talented fingers for shot put.

We spent a lot of money for you

to go to that big sports school.

It's alright, father.

Let me help like when I was little.

The only way to properly repair a tire

is to remove the damaged material,

fill the void with rubber,

and seal the inner liner with our repair unit.

A plug or patch by itself is not a acceptable repair.

The plug or patch does not fill the void

left by the penetrating object.

The tire will start to corrode the steel belts.

Not all tires can be repaired.

When tires are repaired improperly,

the results can be deadly.

I hope Father can make it to my final shot-put exam tomorrow.

Good luck with the final shot-put exam tomorrow.

I'm sorry Daddy is too busy to make it.

Your mother would be so proud if she were still alive.

She was the anchor for her school's team.

Because of her skill, her team won every match.

I know that her beautiful spirit

will be watching over you.

I will do my best to make both of you...

proud.

I am but a simple tire repairman,

but knowing that you are a talented shot-put girl

like your mother fills me with...

pride.

Oh, no. I'm going to be late.

Why would Makasu-senpai want to hang out

in that empty classroom?

[ Tink! Tink! Tink! Tink! Tink! Tink! ]

[ Moaning ]

Oh, yeah. Hmm, Bocini.

Oh, no.

[ Panting ]

Where is Bucket?

The exam begins in 15 minutes,

and we can't have our anchor fail out of school.

Is everything alright? You look upset.

I'm fine. I can do this.

I won't let you down.

I will do my best.

Bucket: [ To herself ] Don't think about it, Bucket.

You should have known you never had a chance.

You're not sexy and rugged and Italian

like the bocce ball teacher.

You're just a little, nubile, slender-fingered shot-put slut.

Just focus on the game, Bucket, and make your mother proud.

Ha!

[ Whistle blows ]

Man: You suck at shot put.

Bucket, can you do this?

We can't have you flunk.

You're making a fool of the whole class!

Father, you made it for me.

I can do it. I promise. Huh!

[ Whistle blows ]

Hey, look, it's Bucket. Hey, Bucket.

Don't screw up at the shot-put test

or you'll be expelled from school forever, Bucket.

[ Panting ]

Ha! Ha!

Go, Bucket! I love --

Oh, my eye!

Whoopsie, I killed my dad

because I was distracted by Makasu.

Narrator: "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu"

[ Wind howling ]

Damn it!

Line up, boys. Let me get a good luck at you.

[ To himself ] Yeah, that's a good-looking

set of boys we got this year.

Surely All Supotsu Sports Academy for All Sports

will make finals and win that big tennis trophy.

And maybe I'll finally get that big promotion.

Plus I still have my secret weapon,

the talented all-star sports boy...

[ Echoing ] Makasu!

Where's that Makasu, anyways?

[ Groaning ]

Makasu?

Makasu, what's wrong? Are you injured?

Can I get you any blue sports drink?

[ Groaning continues ]

Oh!

Oh!

Makasu.

Oh.

[ Crying ] It's my grandfather.

He was wounded in a rac-quet-ball accident

at the rac-quet court.

Ooh! I was there.

And I blame myself.

And now I have emotional pain.

[ Crying ]

And it's my fault

and my emotional pain is...

[ Mumbling ]

I've got a lot of emotional pain right now.

I'm -- I'm gonna...

Aah!

Ooh!

Ay yi yi yi.

No, he's running away!

Oh!

Makasu -- he had so much potential.

How could you drop out of this tennis program

so suddenly like this?

[ Crying ]

Damn it!

M-- Makasu, wait!

Please don't do this!

We can talk about it.

I'm sure after some therapy, you'll be fine.

No, you don't understand.

Makasu, let's go here.

Huh?

You've been on thin ice lately.

The whole tennis program has.

Haven't won a match in four years.

And we're a goddamn sports academy!

I know, sir.

And now I hear a student -- no, not just a student,

but a third year with all S grades

throughout his time here at Supotsu All Academy --

he's run out of your class, topless and sobbing?

Uh, sir, he --I won't hear it.

Fix your shit, piss pants.

Poor Makasu!

I was so focused on my own pain,

the tournament, the big trophy...

[ Tires screeching ]

[ Thunder rumbling ]

...the promotion.

[ Crying ]

As -- as a teacher,

I should be there for my students

when they're at their worst.

[ Tires screeching ]

What's wrong with me?

♪♪

♪♪

Ha! Time Devils!

Let's grab his papers!

I've got it! Aah!

My American football term paper

for American Football Term Paper class!

Stop, you pestilent Time Devils.

Leave the boy alone!

Oh, my God. It's him.

It's that man.

He's told us to stop.

Ahh. The power of time!

[ Gibberish ]

Whew-wee.

That takes care of that.

Goblin: I am the helpful custodian of All-Sportsu.

I also work fighting against Time Devils

who like to mess with time.

My name is...

Time Lord Tim.

I am the custodian of time space,

and this is my Time Piece Puzzle.

It allows me to control and harness the power of time.

Now run along.

Back to sports class with you.

You wouldn't want to be late with that term paper,

would you, my good boy?

Well... Gee, thank you, mister.

I am the friendly custodian of All Supotsu Sports Academy

for Sports Students.

It brings me such joy to help these fine young students

in any way that I can,

be it defending them from mischievous Time Devils

or cleaning up after their dirty accidents.

That is my job. I must do it. I love them.

All with the help of my Time Piece Puzzle,

a great and powerful artifact

that I received such a long time ago.

I won the Time Piece Puzzle from a giant grandfather clock

in the great battle that lasted for just a single moment

and all of eternity, all at once.

[ Bell rings ]

Ugh, so dehydrated.

You know what they say.

As soon as one mess is cleaned up,

another one takes its place.

Don't you worry because worry not.

I control the power of time.

Uh-huh. I'll clean it.

Right in the hole where pies ago.

You fool! What have you done?

This is no laughing matter.

Your actions will have dreadful consequences.

Oh, no!

[ Time Devils laughing ]

I've got fingers!

No. Please!

Makasu, help!

He's going to scramble my eggs. Ow.

We're going to put you through puberty

until you barf your genitals, Tim!

Ohh! My brains! Ow! My gentils!

Get away from that weird-looking janitor,

you demon bastards!

Hyo. Hyo.

Hyo. Hyo. Hyo.

Weird little man. Are you okay?

I warned you, Makasu.

These events will have cosmic consequences.

And now, because of you,

my teen gentils are fused to my brain.

Ooh. I'm a mess.

I'm a big mess, and no one will clean me.

Agh.

And now I'm dead.

Ah, wow.

Oh, boy.

[ Bell rings ]

I had fun being your soccer partner.

Those were some great kicks.

Bye, everybody!

I had a lot of fun playing soccer today.

Well, well, well.

What do we have here?[ Gasps ]

Looks like two beautiful young men

with frosted tips and pockets.

[ Shuddering ] Who are you?

Allow me to introduce myself.

I go to the nearby public school,

and I want you to hand over all of your valuables.

You bully!

Have a taste of my ultimate technique!

[ Echoing ] Electric Scorpion Kick!

Hi-yah!

Foul!

Witness now my ultimate technique.

Instead of wasting my time with useless training drills

and team-building exercises,

I combined the ancient art of tattooing using henna dye

prepared from the Egyptian privet plant

with the modern science of steroid technologies,

generating these.

My hennaroids!

Hey! No fair!

That's cheating!

All you little academy kids,

running around kicking

your own spotted pentagon balls.

It makes me sick.

Now arm wrestling.

That's a real sport.

Ooh. Ow, ow, ow.

You. You're the bully

targeting my fellow students

at the All Supotsu Academy.

You're showing bad supotsu-manship.

If you're going to arm wrestle anyone, bully,

arm wrestle me.

You wish to challenge me?

[ Laughing ]

So be it.

You see now, Makasu?

You cannot beat me.

I possess the ancient Egyptian power of arm wrestling.

Your sports cannot save you now.

You underestimate the power

of modern regulation sports.

[ Yelling ]

I don't know how this is happening.

You have bested me in an honorable way.

I guess being a bully isn't how --

I will now strip you of your power.

No.

And your money.

And also their money.

Hey, ma. I'm back early.

My bullying got cut short.

No. No. Run away.

Hey.

Don't try nothing, you stupid noodle-armed little punk.

Mother.

Nooo!

[ Gunshot ]

If only I hadn't come home early.

If only I didn't have these noodle arms.

This is all your fault.

Akari: When I was a girl, I wanted to be a secretary.

My mother and I would often visit a simple countryside

rice porridge eatery.

The taste of the rice porridge they served

always brought me joy.

When I grow up, I want to be a secretary.

Sorry, honey, but you're too plain-looking

to be a secretary.

Aw.

Why don't you sell some flowers

so no one has to look at your face?

They're distracted by the flowers,

and not your ugly face.

Mmm!

Shut up. Mommy's eating.

So I hid my plain face behind the beautiful blossoms

of my flowers.

I would return to the rice porridge restaurant every year,

even after my mother passed.

Mommy, why is that woman so plain?

Shh. I told you.

Don't look at plain-looking women.

They're different.

Thanks for the flowers. Have a nice day.

Years passed until one day I met a handsome young stranger

at the same simple country eatery.

He was foreign, a tourist.

After lunch, he insisted on coming back with me to my cart.

Man 2: There are so many flowers here.

I can't decide on which ones to buy.

Which flowers do you like the most?

M-- me, sir?

Yes. You.

Well, I've always admired the beautiful red carnation.

Ah. Of course.

They are striking.

The red carnations it is, then.

No. Keep them.

They suit you.

Soon I became his bride,

and on my wedding day,

I carried red carnations.

It's like a little flower.

You're like a little flower.

Every day, I made my husband

the same rice porridge from my childhood.

Every day, I hid my plain face behind the flowers in my cart.

I have found peace in the simple way I live my life.

Ooh! Stop!

I must buy all your plants!

Here's all my money!

Oh, my! Thank you, sir!

I'm running in place to burn calories.

Have a nice day!

[ Tires screeching ]

[ Men moaning ]

Oh, yeah. Oh.

Oh, we're making out.

Oh, Italian! Ah, ooh!

Beautiful. Like a red carnation.

Bocce instructor: Smells like -- mmm.

Smells like rice porridge.

I hate when you interrupt our sex for porridge.

My God. She caught me having an affair

with my student and killed herself

and made herself into rice porridge.

My God! She's a rice porridge!

No! No! No!

Can't believe...it.

Ahahuhuhahaahhhh.

[ Crying ]

Stop crying! Ignore the guilt!

They're all dead 'cause of me!

But, Makasu... No.

You can't let this get to you.

I told you, God damn it, don't let Supay get to you!

[ Laughs ]

Looks like the little sportsman is out of commission.

Too bad his big, bad journey had to end so soon.

No!

I'm a second-degree murderer in the cosmic degree

and a first-degree murderer of gods.

But I've always been murdering since the beginning.

Everyone, I'm a murder man,

not a sportsman.

No. No. No. No.

No one can resist the guilt of the projections

of the knowledge of death

that the god of death has projected into their mind

with his big, beautiful, sexy eyes.

Ahh.

Uh, 15-15.

Aw, gosh.

He's just going to easily score points

if you lie down like that.

I don't deserve to win.

Supay!

You think you can just drain this sportsman tennis boy

of all his power and energy with guilt?

Think?! You boogie woogie bubble butt.

I just did!

30-15.

So cocky, so damn proud

of your mind tricks and your big eyes.

They're big and sexy eyes, damn it! Hyah!

Sorry. Ooh la la.

Makasu is better than your guilt,

your brainwashing,

your boogie-woogie dancing antics.

You're the bumble-butt boogie woogie --

I just said you were. Hyah!

But the truth is...

you're ashamed, Supay. Hyah!

Ashamed of your tiny, real tiny,

just small, tiny eyes!

Ooh! No.

My big, beautiful, sexy eyes.

Ohhh.

Oooh.

I'm becoming ugly, small bones.

Bones.

Wow. You defeated him by destroying his m--

fake eyes and revealing his tiny, real tiny,

just small, tiny eyes.

Chirp chirp.

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear?

Hmm, chirp?You're snuggling me now,

even though I was acting like a real man's brown Starburst.

You've lived your life ignoring most consequences,

and all I ask, all I've ever asked,

is to take those moments of guilt, of emotion,

and forget them.

Move past them.

No one else matters.

It's true.

Ever since my grandfather lost his mind,

I've gone numb to the world, but you're saying...

I should be numb?

That no one else matters?

Except for me, helping you in tennis.

These are your most important sports fights yet.

Chirp.

Hey, I'm in the cuddle puddle, too.

What a weird way for this tennis match to end.

Narrator: Within "tennis", there is an "I".

Eye translated to Quechua is Nawi.

I like to think of it as the soul hole.

You have the cornelius which produces tears,

the iris which surrounds the main sphere,

the receptor grid with rods and cones lining the perimeter,

the fovic mass, and of course the color torus.

If people have less rods than cones,

they may see more angular shapes.

If people have more cones than rods,

they see more spherical shapes.

With your eyes, you can fixate on an object

to absorb the color spectrum known as red through violet.

People ask what colors the eye can see,

but the question should be what colors can the eyes be?

Purple, sea foam, copper, pubus, and green.

Soul, souls, souls, souls,

purpose of the eye is to seek the soul, soul,

the purpose of the eye is to seek the soul, soul soul,

to see -- to see,

the sole purpose of the eye is to see --

the sole purpose of the eye is to see the window --

the sole purpose of the eye

is to see the window of the soul...

The windows, the windows the windows...

Eye, eye, eye, eye...

Chair Umpire: Do not panic

if suddenly your eyes give out in a bout

of tremor or panic.

Ugh.

Because an impression of an eye

can be made and saved and bought and taught.

Feel the weight of your eyes, feel the weight of your eyelid,

now let your eyelid slide,

now place your eyelid over your eye, crying.

Do you cry? Open your eyes.

Of all the senses, sight is the third most visual.

We have two eyes.

We have two eyes. We have two eyes.

In order to see. In order to see.

In order to see what is before us.

See what is before us. See what is before us.

Reflections, refractions refracting

off refractions.

The center of the iris, what you may not know of the iris,

two eyes is that we have a third eye.

Sight.

Sight is the third most visual sight.

Visual sight. Visual sight.

Visual sight.

Visual center of the eye.

Third eye. Third eye. Third eye.

Iris. Iris. Iris. Iris.

Iris. Iris. Iris. Iris.

Iris. Iris. Iris. Iris.

Iris. Iris. Iris. Iris.

Iris...

pect you.

The God of Tennis teaches Makasu

to suppress guilt with the power of alcohol,

but they're ambushed by Khan, god of the wind,

and his surprise friend, Kataquill, god of thunder.

Can Makasu deal with a doubles tennis match on his own?

Tune in next year

for "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu Chapter 4:

Break Point".

♪♪

♪♪

Narrator: Makasu is no match for the god of death, Supay.

Look into my big sexy eyes, Makasu.

They're super duper sexy.

Take off Supay's sexy eyes to reveal his hidden creepy eyes.

Outer space Makasu action figure

including a box of freeze-dried ice cream and --

Hi, Makasu.

♪♪

Hi, Makasu. It's good to see you.

Bucket's father has ball-shooting action.

Be careful. My grandfather had a nail

shoot through his eye when he was hammering.

It's about time...

I showed up as an action figure.

Time Lord Tim manipulates time

with his puzzle piece-spinning belt.

Finally, you can erase all those mistakes

you made in junior college.

Holy crap! It's Paint Brush Makasu!

Now I can paint any tennis opponent into a corner.

Hey, Makasu!

Get ready for a beating with my big muscle arms!

Check out these gnarly tats, bruh.

The Bully covered in tattoos that g-- g-- g--

glow in the dark!

Radical!

Hey, I'ma here to teach you how to play bocce ball!

Italian bocce ball instructor!

[ Screaming ]

[ Screaming continues ]

"Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu" action figures and play sets.

My name is Makasu, and I'm an international sportsman

and religious relic thief.

You might have heard of my heists

and my famous abilities in sports.

I always travel with my servant,

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear,

who lives in my back pocket dimension.

My most recent quest involves challenging all the Incan Gods

to tennis for the treasure of South America.

On this journey I actually met the French God of tennis,

friends with these Incan Gods,

who's been helping me put them all to rest,

and thus kill them after defeating them at tennis.

A little while ago, Supay, the God of death and a trickster,

flooded my mind with guilty memories.

And now, I don't feel so good.

Makasu? Do you still not feel so good?

I'm trying hard to forget my feelings,

like you said, but the memories are lingering.

Uku Pacha may be behind us, God of Tennis.

But I'm still here. In my head.

Let me try to be better at helping you.

There's an old French fable by Jean de la Frompe

about an old worm and an old rat.

I'm going to tell it to you now.

♪♪

Whatever could that strange sound be?

Oh, a worm! You gave me a fright.

Damn! Are you digging a hole?!

I was until you came bursting in!

I only burst through because

I was just so excited to see you, dear.

I have wonderful news!

Is it news about how helping me fill my hole?

No! I was just at the Font a le Bean's table junction,

and I heard mutterings among the folks there

that there is to be a contest!

And I think you and I have a great chance of winning it!

Ooh, ooh! What is the contest?

We simply have to guess at the day of the first rain of winter!

And if we guess correctly we will win the prize!

And what is the prize?

It seems that the vermin holding the contest want

to keep it a secret.

Oh, a secret prize?

Go away, Old Worm!

I'm not going through all the hassle of entering a contest

when I don't even know what the prize is in the first place.

But we have an advantage, Old Rat, my dear.

And what is that?

Your old bones!

My old bones?Your old bones!

Ahh, how my old bones possibly gonna know when it's gonna rain?

Old Rat, you know as well as I do

that you can always tell when it is going to rain

because your old bones always ache.

Ah, old worm, my old bones they only ache,

when it's about to rain and the first rain is in winter

and it is fall.

I did not think about that.

Oh, Worm, you don't -- you don't think about anything.

Even so.

Oh, Worm, don't be so down and out.

I think I got an idea.

♪♪

Oh, my old bones!Are they aching?

Yeah, they are, but it's too early for the first rain!

Oh, let us run down to the guessing booth!

Perhaps we can make it in time!

Okay!

We have a new guess from when its gonna rain.

It's today!

Oh, is that so?

That is very silly.

It is still fall.

We would like to submit our guess.

If you insist.

♪♪

What's next then? Did it rain?

Was the rat right? What happened?

What's important isn't whether or not they were right,

but that they had a journey together that day

and shared fashion hats.

Be in the moment, not in the past.

Every moment is beautiful.

Wow, like when I waited in line at Cobie City Electronics

for the new Cobie game cream

and they didn't make enough, so no one got any.

Wow. But hanging out in line?

That's an experience I never wanna forget.

It's not the results --

except also I wanna get the treasure of South America.

I also have one other way to help deal

with your guilt and memories.

It's this building called Bar, where they serve alcohol drinks.

[ Man singing in Japanese ]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

I regret not buying a house years ago,

when it was a buyer's market.

I regret not apologizing to my mother years ago,

when she was still alive.

I regret letting my marriage fall apart years ago,

when I worked too much.

It's a good thing we're taking a break at this bar

to learn about erasing regrets with alcohol.

Now I understand why my dad always told me

he drank to forget.

Ah, mmm -- because it works!

Yes, it helps.

Drink.All: Drink.

I'll get the next round.

I have some regrets to share.

But you're put together and have a red hat!

What regrets could a person like you

possibly have if you've got that kind of hat?

I don't want to talk about mine just yet.

Let's hear about yours first.

Bartender! Your finest whiskey.

Oh.Time to spill.

It was a blue house with a red door.

I wish my indecisiveness let me buy it sooner.

It was a stupid argument about loans.

I wish I told her I didn't need to borrow her money.

I wish I told my mother I loved her.

It wasn't my fault for being unfaithful.

I wish I never got caught.

I wish I never had a secretary.

I wish I had a prettier wife.

Why did this have to happen to me?

Ahh, yes! Wonderful.

And you, child?

[ Slurping ]

It's fitting you ask in a way.

♪♪

Just recently an Incan god of death

tried to fill me with regret,

shaming me for my hyper-sexual past

and for the people I killed indirectly.

But thankfully, my friend the God of Tennis

brought me here and taught me how to neuter these feelings

with booze!

That's not a real regret!

You better give me what I want or else.

I like these.

Can I have another one of these? I like them.

I am the Regret Demon

and I will feast on your past mistakes!

Now speak, you pathetic human, or I will kill you!

Sorry, but my only regret now

is that it took me so long to discover whiskey.

Whiskey is delicious!

I wasn't much of a drinker before.

I'd only drink socially, you know, just to fit in.

But, man, this whiskey stuff, it tastes like wood.

Ugh!

I guess I don't have regrets, either.

Ugh!

I guess my regret is pointless anyways.

Ugh!

I guess my regret

teaches me to be a better person!

Noooooooooo!

The truth is, Makasu, I knew the Regret Demon would be here

and I knew that you were vulnerable and weak after Supay.

But I knew that you could also take the lessons from the fable

about the Old Rat and Worm from Jean de la Frompe.

You know what, God of Tennis?

Let's all dance!

♪♪

Yeah, ha-ha!

Running.

[ Snorts ]

I'm very hungover.

With all you've accomplished I sometimes

forget your mortal stamina for alcohol.

I'm fine with having two beers

and then feeling all funny inside.

But now I feel like making bottom throw up.

Aww, Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear

does a little puke, just like in the movies -- Hollywood!

[ Chirp ]You're right.

It's good to be out of Uchu Pacha

and be here, among the fresh air.

The pacha are distinct, separate worlds,

but as we've seen, they are connected through passageways.

Such as the mountainous Under Andes

we took to spring cave that led us to the Supay.

Ow -- bleh!

Oh, you stupid flying bear.

Everyone knows that quinoa grain map tastes

just like normal quinoa, which is a bad taste.

Makasu, please.

Don't shit all over the food of this country

while I'm explaining a diagram of the different

planes of existence in the Incan cosmos.

[ Flatulence ] I can't help but dump poo

all over the local tubers and flora.

He's right. I shouldn't try and change him.

Some men just dump poo all over local tubers and flora.

I can't help but dumpu.

Whoa?!Huh!

Aahhh.

What is this? Hold on, wait, let me pull up my pants real quick.

What is this wind that's brewing?

Oh! Uh oh!

Everybody!

Whoap!

Gotta avoid this male defecate!

Whoa, the chair umpire almost rolled into my brown dumpu!

Chair Umpire!

Sorry to blow in with the wind.

[ Laughs ] Very funny to me.

Okay, listen.

Your wildest challenge is yet about to c--occur!

Is yet about to occur.

Uh-oh.Makasu!

The chair umpire means to tell us

our journey is being interrupted by Kon.

Ron!

[ Chirp ]No, Ron! Ron!

Kon! With a K!

Ron!Kon!

[ Grunting ]

My hair's going everywhere, like a big pork.

Ah, kick! Kick! Kick!

♪♪

-Fwah! -Ron!

Kon! Kon! Kon!Nope.

Kon, like Kon-traceptive. Kon!

That's right, Kon, the boy wind god,

is here for tennis.

I blow wind up your ass. [ Laughs ]

Very funny.

♪♪

Oowee.

Makasu the sportsman.

Now he's playin' tennis with that wind god O'Kon.

You know the wind been pretty foolishly strong lately.

The wind blew too much,

I don't think I can have my little campfire here.

He'd blow it right out, blow it right over.

Fire go flying down the road.

Wind can do all kinda things.

Oh, for instance last week, the wind blew so hard,

it blew all the dirt right off my old dog's back,

and down the tip of the tail and right off.

I didn't even have to give him a bath the next day.

Well, I'll tell you one thing.

That old wind is not gonna blow me away

or my toasty campfire tonight.

Whoa!

What Mr. Wind blew in now?

Looks like a short animated classic of Makasu.

Eight years ago and I'll take it too, you know why?

'Cause we been so down and out lately and feeling sad,

I think something sweet and cheerful like this

might be a good break.

From the old hypermasculinity of sport.

[ Beeping ]

Go on in there little feller.

[ Beeping ]

Makasu Quick Sports Memory.

♪♪

The facts are this, Rivers.

We know Makasu is battling the gods of Slavic paganism,

and that's the only facts we have.

I'm sorry we don't have more facts.

The chill of the wind here, snow...

It's all beautiful.

Your wife and your son should be at the safe house now.

I-I'm sure you're used to the drill.

Yeah, two years I've been after this guy.

It's been tough, but I feel like we all enjoy the excuse

to see the world.

It's a struggle for Sonia, my wife, sometimes,

but she is doing her best to be able to work from home.

You know? I really look up to you.

Oh, my piss.Yeah-ah!

Formula One racecar! Nice!

Ugh, Bendy Rivers, my nemesis.

That is a Formula One racer.

Luckily the old fool doesn't yet realize

the favorite sport of the Slavic deities

is Formula One racing and that that racer is my racer

from beating them all in Formula One racing.

Besides, I've already defeated Ognebog, the fire god,

and took Pakobhhk, the herb that unlocks

and opens everything locked or closed.

They say that only tortoises can recognize it.

Whoa.

Hello, everyone, at Cobie City Speedway!

My name is Cobie,

and I am the CEO of Cobie City Electronics.

You may recognize me as one of the most eligible bachelors

in this month's DVD+R Magazine,

and I pioneered this state-of-the-art

Cobie 360 jumbotron.

It's 3-D, and it's 360 degrees.

Look at it move.

This is a gorgeous day

for the highly anticipated race between Makasu,

the sportsman who cannot be defeated,

and Ognebog, the fire god

of Slavic pagan mythology and folklore,

whose flames may very well consume Makasu today.

One thing that the fire cannot consume

is the fire-resistant Cobie Coob Brick,

a wireless 8k streaming device,

available for sale at vendors across the speedway.

Makasu, you will know defeat

when you feel the full power of my 45 degrees.

45 degrees Celsius?

What's that in Fahrenheit?

78? Ooh, 78.

Today will be the last sporting event of your pathetic life.

Ognebog, the fire god, this is hot.

Ooh, 78.

Whoa.

Look at their heated exchange and look at their tires.

So thick!

If you would like to make your own tires this big

and never have a flat tire again,

look under your seats for the 10% off coupon

of a Cobie Tire Inflater, on sale now!

And look in the sky!

Bobcat Dylan, the Cobie City Hang Glider Expert

and Advertiser.

Doesn't he seem excited about our new inflaters?

Now look in the stands.

It's Triple Trout, our Cobie City Spokes-fish,

selling inflaters whenever you want one.

Audience: Triple Trout, we love you!

And now, here's a quick video I made to advertise

the Tire Inflater to you.

Whoa. Slow down!

It looks like you have a flat tire.

I'll inflate it.

I just need the last four digits of your Social

to unlock the tire.

Go ahead, and I'll enter them

on the keypad below when you're ready.

Thanks for the digits.

You're good to go.

[ Air hissing ]

Hello. I'm Bobcat Dylan,

official hang glider of Cobie City marketing.

And I'm Triple Trout,

the official spokes-trout of Cobie City.

You should buy a tire inflater.

They're not that expensive and they work.

You can't blow your own tires.

Cobie City Electronics.

Have we leaked the tires of every car

in parking lot, Kiwi?

We have deflated all the tires in the lot.

We anticipate record sales.

Yeah? That's great!

What a delight!

Cobie, what an electronics mogul.

And to be here at his raceway.

You know, Ognebog, I've got all of his products.

I've got the Cobie Branch,

I got the Cobie Ear Muffys,

the Cobie Smart Freeze.

I've been saving up for Cobie electronics

since I was 14 years old when I was back in high school.

And I was packing bags, at the paper bag store.

Shut up, capitalist scum!

Capitalist scum? Is that the new MP3 player?

Racers!

On your mark!

Get set! Go!

Goodbye, goodbye!Huh?

Oh. Ah.

My tires deflated!

We even drained Makasu's tires?

It wasn't supposed to happen, but we can fix it.

We can sell Makasu a tire inflater.

It'll look great for our brand.

Yes! Our tire inflater is his only hope.

I like your thinking.

Ahem, everyone, everyone!

If you need a Tire Inflator,

don't forget the Cobie City mascot Triple Trout

is perusing the stands now, selling them from his basket.

How many have we sold, Triple Trout?

We sold three!

Listen to this song!

Isn't it catchy?

I remixed it with the sound of my own leaking tires.

You've heard of EDM music.

What do you think about ETM, electronic tire music?

It's catchy, right?

Triple Trout has a tire inflater for sale in the a-- here?

Looks like I'll be spending my money here in Serbia,

helping their economy.

I need that Cobie Tire Inflater!

[ Engine revving ]

Trout man, I need a rip of your inflater.

No cash. We need a bank card or a Cobie Currency Card.

I'm in the middle of a race!

Come on, Triple Trout, your boy only got this much paper money.

Hey, man, we need a card with some valid information on it.

It's for security reasons.

I'm not trying to take your identity or anything.

I'm not an identity thief!

No way, man.Thank you very much.

Hey, what do you think you're doing?

Come back here.

Here we go.

Now I'm off. I'm off.

Hey, I think that trout stole my identity!

♪♪

Aahh! Meeit!

Sesuki.

Aah. Thanks a lot, comrades!

Huh?

Oh, I love vanilla ice cream sandwiches

in those soggy brown cookies.

I will your melt ice-cream sandwich.

[ Speaking foreign language ]

Oh, no. My ice-cream sandwich

is doing a melt all over my pants.

And it's very sticky and messy.

Oh, gosh.

It's a sticky and messy race now.

Ahh! Ugh!

Ahhh!

Dear Makasu, the flames will consume you here in Serbia.

♪♪

Aah!

Send me a postcard from wherever it is

you Slavic gods go to lose, Ognebog.

I love collecting postcards.

[ Crash ]

What? No way!

Surprise, surprise, little boy.

It won't be that easy.

Tiny dancer, you have reached the end

of the yellow brick road, Makasu.

[ Grunting ] I'm uusing my tire inflater.

I-It's my last hope.

Uh, ah.

Gotta use the inflater.

Uh-uah.

Wouldn't it be nice to buy a tire inflater?

Hey, Bobcat!

Let's finish this!

Cobie Electronics has two mascots.

One is a trout, and one is a flying man.

The trout is meant to connect with teenagers.

The flying man is meant to connect with horny rude wives.

Women were not satisfied by their husbands,

so they think of the flying man

and think that he'll take them away.

[ Engine revving ]

♪♪

This will not be the last that you see of me, Makasu.

Dasvidaniya! -What a race!

Congratulations, Makasu!

I may have one a race against a god of fire today, Ognebog,

whom I have defeated in Formula One racing

in order to get this, Pakobhhk,

the herb that opens everything locked or closed.

But I think I realized something even more important,

ladies and gentleman.

Maybe the gods of today are closer than we think.

Cobie, your amazing products are in all of our homes,

listening to every word we say.

Fire, who needs fire today?

Who has a fireplace?

And in a way, is this man not more of a god

than this obsolete charred dust person

Ognefer-fer-- That's something to think about.

That's a theme, I think.

That's an idea.

And I don't think anyone's written about it.

I'm going to the shower room of lockers and rinse myself off.

♪♪

Sometimes I wonder if just filling up

this back pocket dimension with stuff is burying myself

in my own metaphorical isolation.

But then I remember I'm in my early 20s

and I don't have time to worry about anything.

But maybe then also do I wonder if I actually want a friend.

♪♪

[ Knocking at door ]

Huh? Oh, cool, a box.

[ Grunting ]

Dang it.

Duh, Pakobhhk.

Whoa! Oh, sick!

My Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear slave came in the mail.

Who needs friends when you have media

and an unpaid intern animal bear flying in your back pocket?

♪♪

♪♪

Here are all the identities I stole.

Thank you, Triple Trout.

We will add all of these identities to the newsletter,

and we'll finally achieve diamond status.

Hey, I think my tire inflater broke.

Come on, guys, let's get outta here.

Can you actually fly with all of us on this hang glider?

Yeah. I trust the wind!

[ Harmonica notes playing ]

♪♪

Diamond status.

That may or may not offer insight into our characters

or the events at hand or even the -- the themes of --

of wind and, well, the way it blows by.

I do know we don't have much time

'cause this life is mighty short,

and the way that wind will sneak up

on you and blow around the corner

a good thing or not a cocoon laying up on the windowsill.

'Cause then we might just tumble off,

and next thing you know we're going to a party

but now just a big pile of yellow goop on the ground.

Well, let's see.

Uh, let me get back on track.

Uh, why don't we, uh, just follow that wind

and check back up on Makasu

and his tennis match with the Incan god Kon.

I-I-I think it's been 8 years now.

Take caution, Makasu.

Kon is the only child of Inti,

the Incan Sun God, and Mama Killa, the moon.

Through his gradual mental decline over the years

Kon has become a pompous, wind-filled monster,

who also benefits from many years of private tennis lessons.

He may have the body of a child,

but he has the strength of an average man.

Guh!

Kon, you may have the power of a thousand winds,

but you stink real bad,

like someone spilled beer on a lost dog.

Like young hormones and the inside of an artichoke.

Aah.

You think you have the skills to defeat me, mortal?

Let's see what you can do.

♪♪

I hit balls!

Impressive.

You will be an excellent challenge.

Destroying the others must have been good practice.

But I'm a whole different game.

Fat chance, you small little freak.

The game hasn't changed.

Last time I checked, it's still the game of tennis.

Nasty boy hate stare!

♪♪

Huh?! Rain?

Was that old rat right?

Looks like we're in for some nasty weather.

Perhaps you should rethink this, mortal.

Incan rainstorms are unlike any other.

Forfeit this match and go back to the puddle of mud

you grew out of.

If I can handle Mama Cocha's water balls and waves,

I can handle your light pruning, Kon.

Maybe you're the one who's getting tired.

Just a little winded.

Ugh, my fingers and whole body --

so raisin-y.

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear!

[ Chirp ]Get me my windbreaker!

To counter this wind I need no ordinary artifact,

but rather a personal artifact!

♪♪

The hand-me-down windbreaker from my grandfather.

Grandfather!

♪♪

Looks like your emotional instability

will be your downfall. Hunh!

You! Nasty boy hate stare!

♪♪

You do have anger that scars the heavens, human.

Heh, yeah.Oh, no.

Has Kon created a gash in the heavens

just small enough to allow?

We heard you've been doing tennis murders, man.

That's not cool, man.

Catequil's particular dementia involves him

saying the word "man" a lot.

Man, thanks for opening that brief Pacha Gash for me

to slip through and give you big swipe tennis slices, man.

Let's suffocate this creep with the very air he breathes.

Huh!Man, that sounds chill, Man.

♪♪

Ugh.

♪♪

Two people at tennis for doubles.

How can I even manage?

They're just hovering there, aware of their lead, taunting.

[ Tennis ball bouncing ]

Phuah!Uh!

Ugh!

Ow! Ugh!

You simply don't have the power to even stand against me.

It's almost a good thing Catequil is here.

Man, I'm the life of the party, man!

I've done everything.

Like I kissed three chicks in one night.

Ca-caw!Ouch, big rocks.

Hip lunge boast!

Ooh!

Ow! Ow!

They're playing with my body like a limp rag doll of a man.

Earlier when I said I wasn't any good at tennis, I was correct.

I knew I wasn't any good at tennis.

If you can't even defeat me, how do you plan to stay alive

against my mother and father? -Shut up!

They'd smash you where you stand.

You pulled a trick on him, Kon.

You started a doubles tennis.

So? You're not my father!

Fwah!

Fwah!Fwah!

Fwah!What?

He resists my God Wind Fwah Fwah?

It's -- It's true. You did break the rules.

I was a little nervous to talk about it, uh,

even though it's my job.

That damn chair!

Always nervous!

[ Whistle screeches ]

Man!

Man!Ugh!

This whistling!

I have done my whistling.

I now will make a ruling.

♪♪

Nothing will change.

What?The ma--

The mortal is gonna fight the gods as an individual

and then they can play as two.

-What? -But, Chair, that is not fair.

Sir, they don't call me the Fair Chair.

They call me the Chair Umpire, which doesn't even rhyme.

That damn chair.

♪♪

I'm sorry, Makasu. You were brilliant.

You took down Ekeko, Mama Cocha, Urcuchillay, Supay.

I don't stand a chance as an individual.

May I kiss you?

No, sometimes I don't like intimacy when I'm stressed.

Wait! Intimacy!

We've touched so many times, God of Tennis.

We've held wrists and arms and floated together.

You've been there, talking in my face

and being sweet over and over again.

Tell me. Have you felt it?Felt what?

That we could, just one time,

use our powers of friendly intimacy

to merge our bodies together to create

one even more powerful ultra individual.

Ultra individual amazing?

It's dangerous, but I feel like if we risk it

this one specific time, we can have an exciting moment

and we can get the infusion of sports

and tennis abilities that we need.

-Chair? -I'm nervous again.

Today is just, like, kind of an off day for me.

And I've just been like, really in my own head.

That damn chair. Always nervous.

Umm. Yeah, you know what?

Actually, sure, just go for it.

♪♪

Are you ready?

As ready as I'll ever be.

♪♪

Uhhhh.

[ Gurgling ]

I really hope they die doing that.

It would be a real load off of my back, man.

Tennis is just quite a lot of energy.

Hard work.Huh.

Gayayaya!

Gah! It's in my eyes.

Gayaya!

Oh, yayaya!You're talking scary now!

I wish I could wipe the spit from my face.

♪♪

Uh, ehh, uhhgh.

Gayaya!

Spine touch!

Bitch, you can talk. What the heck?

You were just going "gayayaya"?

Spine flisk!

What the heck is a flisk?

♪♪

Huh?

Whoa! Their merged form?

Tennis rackets for arms!

Cactuses for legs!

Hyah, hyah, hyah! We are one for tennis.

The rules of tennis are very strange for me,

even as an expert in tennis.

Very well. A merged form. Hmpf.

I guess I stand no chance.

Prepare to be shredded at beef in sport!

Oh, ultra form! So ultra.

I'm so scared!

Don't hurt me. Ah hah!

I don't know, Kon. It seems pretty ultra.

Tennis rackets for arms?

Cactuses for legs?

Pretty ultra.

Shut up. Fwah!

Hey, wait.

Whoa!

♪♪

[ Chirp ]

They've merged as well?

Don't fear, Makasu.

We're on equal playing fields now.

Which is better than where we were before.

On equal fields.

Oh, wow!

♪♪

Hyah!

Fwah!

Hyah, hyah!Grraaahh!

Wow! You big, strong, ultra boys,

are you ready!

Oh, I got gas. What?

Yes! We are ready for tennis!

♪♪

Fwah, fwah, fwah!

H-H-Hyah!

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪ Yuh, aye, backspin

♪ Yo, cut like the wind

♪ Ya, lil boy, like the wind

♪ Dump in

♪ Hit it again Ooh! ♪

♪ That's your ass

♪ Serve, swag, smash

♪ Hit that thing cross court

♪ You know you knock 'em last, aye ♪

♪ Hit that thing cross court

♪ I got em runnin' down

♪ I can tell you runnin' out of stamina ♪

♪ Know I keep them mothaf-- block hot ♪

♪ Boy, you is no match for my drop shot ♪

♪ Oh, my gosh

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce ♪

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce ♪

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce ♪

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce

♪ Serve, swag, serve, sauce ♪

No. No. No.

And that's the game, set, match.

Game! Set! Match!

♪♪

I feel inside broken.

Aah!

We did it.

We ultra-won the form-merging contest tennis match.

Huh?

Through hell and back and whatever extraplanar nonsense

we now find ourselves in, Makasu.

I've found you again.

Wait, Bendy Rivers.

The spiritual detective!

I want to stop him, but I can't move.

I have orders to shoot you on sight.

Give me one goddamn reason I shouldn't kill you right now!

Ugh, my nemesis!

Give me one goddamn reason I shouldn't kill you right now!

Love.

♪♪

Yeah, it sure is hot, Flying Dimension Bear.

♪♪

[ Mumbling ]

♪♪

So, what'll you have?

Flaming Nachos of Bethlehem.

I'm here for Jesus H.

You know this. Spare me the core-malities.

Hey, Jesus Christ, I think someone's here to see you.

♪♪

Flying Bear, don't embarrass me in front of Jesus Christ.

Just shut up.

Huh, Stigmeetos.

You're not an easy man to find.

You just had to look inside yourself.

Come soak your feet, my baby child.

It's refreshing in here.

♪♪

These little nibblers are adorable.

Those fish seem to love your feet, Makasu.

Ooh!

I've heard tale of your legendary sports prowess,

and I just hope you'd come to play with me.

Of course.Seek and ye shall find.

Hands.

♪♪

Let's play.

What's that in your ear?

Oh. A bowling ball.

Oh, wow!

Still don't want anything?Nah.

This will be over soon, Nachos of Bethlehem.

I respect that. You know yourself.

[ Grunting ]

Strike follow point!

Bowling!

Cwwoo!

♪♪

Oooh!

Great job, Makasu.

Oh! Unh.

I just love this game.

♪♪

This is silly, Jesus.

You could never catch up with me.

I've already won.

But you're wrong, Makasu.

Tell me how many pins you see.

Seven.No, Makasu.

7 times 70.

That is my father's love for you.

But how can Lord love me?

Thief of many relics,

who has come here yet to challenge and defeat.

How is heaven above full of so much glow of love?

One is loved because one is loved.

No reason is needed for loving.

I've been focused on the wrong thing.

No one has ever loved me this way.

Ooh.

[ Chirping ]No, please, Flying Bear.

Maybe Bendy Rivers -- I've not been a bad man.

I've wanted to mean something.

Accumulating.

Just to matter, but in the end,

I should probably just be taken for who I am.

And forgive myself.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[ Sniffles ] Even here,

in this outer dimensional in-between worlds of the Incans,

the sun shines bright.

Maybe the key is having something to look forward to.

♪♪

Makasu?

Gone again.

Nothing left but flattened grass,

and I -- hold on.

You can't be serious.

Of all the dumb things you could do, of all the gullible --

Two years ago, Bethlehem.

You bowl against Jesus Christ and score a perfect game,

leaving his wrists gaping as you snag the Stigmata.

Oh, God. How could I be so easily tricked?

Makasu doesn't learn lessons from weaker opponents.

He murders them!

Bendy, it's your wife. I think we should separate.

I've been emotionally cheating on you with a man from Texas

who has a cool farm and motorcycles.

[ Beep ]

♪♪

♪ You, like always try to be like the wind ♪

♪ Suddenly how the love touched me ♪

♪ Following angels, flying in the rainbows ♪

♪ Bring me peacefully

♪ Sleep in your arms

♪ Just believe in me, as I wished going free ♪

♪ Taking through the past to see, ♪

♪ stop the future in my feet

♪ Being strangers, please

♪ Don't rain in our sunny sky

♪ Wrote this song, with love, to say goodbye ♪

♪ For the reasons I've got

♪ There are no regrets to show ♪

♪ How the deeper heartless could be left behind ♪

♪ Ahhhhhhhhh, ooh, aaah

♪ We always fall down

♪ You try, but it's nice to say goodbye ♪

♪ Me, as I wished going free

♪ Taking through the past to see ♪

♪ Stop the future in my feet ♪

♪ Being strangers, please don't rain in our sunny sky ♪

♪ Wrote this song, with love, to say goodbye ♪

♪♪

Woman: That was a very good song, I like that, yeah.

[ Glass shattering ]

Oh. Well it's a -- I was trying to.

I can't get the drift of it.

With the different sports and the different locations

and the different characters that you're putting in there.

I guess the summary was this young man that was into sports

and he was trying different areas to perform,

and different kinds of sports to perform like tennis and --

what was the other? I can't remember.

Seemed like a --

Well anyways, mainly tennis, I think, yeah.

So that was what I thought it was,

this young man trying to their best and win against all odds.

People take maybe winning too serious

and they don't really enjoy the moment

when they're participating in it,

and it's all about winning and not experiencing the time

they're actually participating.

That's what -- the thing now is mindfulness.

Have you ever heard of mindfulness?

And I think that's kind of something new

that's just come up in the last several years,

and I think mindfulness is being in the moment

and the moment that you're in it

instead of thinking about what happened or what's gonna happen,

but trying to say right at the time

that you're actually living in the moment.

I don't know what else -- how else to say it.

Is that your voice on the -- -Man: On the main character?

The whole time?Yeah, I'm Makasu.

Oh, you -- Yeah, it is your voice.

I didn't really recognize that voice.

Didn't recognize your voice with that --

Well that -- that was -- that's good.

I mean, it was very in --

I could understand everything you were saying.

Will people get annoyed by that voice after a while?

No. I didn't.

No, it wasn't annoying at all.

It was a pleasant voice.

It's not -- I didn't get annoyed by your voice.

Three cartons in there a couple of days ago,

but there's only one in there now.

♪♪

There's only one.

Va-nil-la.

I prefer that to any other and then

sometimes put chocolate sauce on it.

Hersheshies.

Syrup.

♪♪

Makasu's bones ache after merging so hard,

but sex, drugs, and rock-hard fake breasts

all cloud Makasu's judgment.

Turn into primordial soup for

"Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu Chapter 5: Foot Fault."

[ Grunting ] So, Doc, what's the verdict?

I wanna have a baby boy!

Well, the good news is your sperm count is off the charts.

You've got more swimmers than the Titanic.

That's stupid. Is there bad news?

Yes, it looks like some of your genetic material

has been damaged.

It's as if someone got rid of all your genes

related to the sport of tennis.

What?! No! Damn you, Keke!

Whoa, calm down. Who's Keke?

Sounds like the name of a shoe.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

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♪♪

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♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

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♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

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♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

I never told you this 'cause I didn't want to seem braggy.

As a child, I was a tennis singles world champion.

My main rival was a Bolivian boy named Keke.

He nearly defeated me in my final match.

But I used my big, fast arms to win.

As I scored the winning point,

he stabbed each of my testicles with an ancient device.

It is my duty to protect the ancient gods

from your offspring!

He yelled as he stabbed each of my testicles

with an ancient device.

I didn't think much of it at the time, and I still don't.

Okay, time for Korea.

I've got to pay more attention to what I'm shooting at.

Please help me.

They killed my dad and my mom

and my neighbors and the birds in those trees.

Sorry, baby boy, we Americans are leaving.

I wanna have a baby boy!

Ah! I feel bad.

Huuuuh!

Hey, kid, get used to calling me "new cooler Dad."

Because I'm gonna let you eat sugary cereals

and stay awake all night

watching scary movies that stir up your wartime traumas.

Here, have some hard Army bread.

In America we eat bread

and we're allowed to wear clothes that aren't beige.

Yep, it's live free or die hard, and dying's for commies.

I spent weeks teaching that poor bastard child

my Western morals, but he just wouldn't listen.

Who was the 15th U.S. President?

-Millard Fillmore? -Wrong!

How much water does the Hoover Dam?

Fuh-Five?

Wrong again! Give me that!

You don't deserve bread.

Wha. What the?

Whoa.

My hands pass through.

But you didn't die and now your wife is pregnant.

How many sons do we have?

The truth is, none.

But also four.

And only one of them will live.

We've done the Super Sportsman Cloning Project

in a Polish laboratory.

There is a curse in your genes,

and playing God can only do so much.

Playing Gods?

That's when I decided I would make sure

whatever clone bastard offspring

I had would spend a lot of time playing

Rac-quet-ball with their grandfather

to make up for poor genes.

Also maybe some of this was a dream.

I'm the main character's grandfather as a young man.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

The death of Catequil and Kon has caused the skies to rage,

which may be helpful in our ritual, but dangerous.

These eyes will open up a space

that a bridge can go through to Hanan Pacha.

I mean, you say eyes, God of Tennis,

but those look more like titties from uh --

ugh, I'm sorry I said that thing about titties just now.

Can I talk to you about something?

Chirp?Yeah.

I didn't tell you this,

but after we did the defeat of Ekeko,

the Chair Umpire flew me around.

Chair told me I'd be absorbing the spirits of the Gods

who had passed after I had defeated them.

Huh? Oh! Chirp?!

And that's never happened to me before, God of Tennis.

I've defeated so many spirits and Gods

and ancient things,

but never have I done an absorb suck power move.

Sure, right.

I feel Supay in my bones, Ekeko in my laugh --

like there's untapped power

in their spirits sleeping inside me.

But I'm too terrified to channel it

or even admit to myself that they live within me.

Yeah. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Is this an Incan-specific related phenomenon?

Hmm. I'm not sure if I'm listening to this.

So many firsts on this adventure.

You helped me conquer my fear of tennis,

we merged and became a super mega form,

I started drinking whiskey,

and now the echoes of your old God friends

are dancing like slutty marbles in my skin.

I've been actively repressing them every chance I can.

Ahh. I don't know if it makes me feel weird.

To have the memory of my victims

dancing like slutty marbles in me.

Mm-hmm. That's good.

-Huh. -Repress everything.

Uh, but thanks for telling me.

Sure. Right.

Oh, well. That's fine.

Right.

I know you keep pushing me.Yeah.

But sometimes.Mm-hmm.

When I'm exhausted, like after the merge we just did.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I start doubting whether or not I was even meant to do this.

I know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I guess I'm just suppose to not give up,

even if Fate itself has destined me for failure.

Listen, I've said it over and over.

Just stop caring and pursue treasures

and kill anyone who gets in the way.

Just relax.

Now give me a hug.[ Chirp ]

♪♪

We're here. The Upper World.

Chirp-chirp.Your tendons must be all sore.

Go rest in the warm water.

Strange: I don't remember this large hotel complex

being near the hot springs.

Ha-ha-ha! Wow!

Look at all this great pork hot tub.

Oh, my [bleep] wet pork!

Are these hot tubs we can relax in as people?

Chirp-chirp!

Hot Tub!Chirp, chirp!

Ha! Zip! Fwim! Whoo!

That's right. Melt those feelings away, Makasu.

Ooh! Ha-ha!

Ha-ha-ha!Wow!

Ah, ha-ha!

Hoo, boy.

That last match really took it out of my loins.

Thanks for leading us here. I'm getting all buttery!

[ Cooing, chirping ]

The hot springs of Hanan Pacha

have resurrected many a traveller.

Ooh, found the bubble spot!

Get in there, you little bitches.

Yeah, do it. Do it.

Yeah, do it, ya little bubbles.

Yes! Enjoy the bubbles!

Shut up, I'm beeping the bubble --

Ooh, bubble![ Flute playing ]

Wuh? What was that noise?

Whoa!A musical melody?

Look!

[ Giggling ]

Who are you girls?

Were you watching me do bumble hump?

Hey, they seem to like you.

[ Splashing ]

♪ We heard your moans, young Makasu ♪

Oh, wow!

♪ And sprung to life to adore you ♪

♪ Each of us represents an alluring stereotype ♪

Singing, hmm, huh.

♪ Nyan Nyan Kitty Maid, feline grace ♪

♪ Bookish Nell wants to read your face ♪

♪ And Fire Ishi knows of danger ♪

♪ Yet can't resist this naked stranger ♪

♪ Stay with us forever

♪ Give up your quest

♪ We'll pleasure every centimeter of your chest ♪

♪ Sports are for losers

♪ We know what's best

♪ Makasu

♪ Stay with us forever

♪ But first decide

♪ Which one of us you'd like ♪

♪ To be your bride

♪ Don't make us fight you

♪ Just pick a side

♪ Makasu

♪♪

♪ I like thick boys with hygiene for days ♪

♪ I can sense you're educated by your worldly gaze ♪

♪ Did you know that oily rags can lead to a blaze? ♪

♪ Even proper ventilation

♪ Cannot stop smoke inhalation ♪

♪ Stay with us forever

♪ Don't make us beg

♪ Your surrender will engender us to stroke your leg ♪

♪ Tennis is a sham no matter what that guy says ♪

♪ Makasu

♪ Sleep with us forever

♪ Make your pick

♪ You want a kitty or a bookworm ♪

♪ or sound safety tips?

♪ We need an answer or we will [bleep] up your shit! ♪

♪ Makasu-u-u

♪ Makasu

What a conundrum.

I want to complete this journey,

but these babes are, ugh, saying otherwise.

They were awfully dismissive of tennis.

Hmm. That bothers me.

One of my few remaining weaknesses --

sins of the flesh!

Makasu, the choice is clear.

Makasu, the choice is clear.

And the choice is me, oh, wise one.

This reminds me of ventriloquism.

Yeah. That's what I do.

I'm the ventriloquist.

Gabe, it's cool. You can go.

Yeah, it's weird now.

My aunt and uncle who raised me never approved of me

"throwing my voice."

Called it the warlock's tongue.

Lashed me all strung up in their beer cellar

and left me hanging upside down,

my bleeding skin nourishing their microbrew homestyle

for all their bearded friends.

♪♪

[ Gasps ] What a messy boy!

Look at all these dirty things.

If he doesn't clean up his room soon, he might get grounded.

How will a messy boy make it to the spring carnival

and find his true love on the Ferris wheel

if he can't leave his home?

Aww.

Nyan Nyan Kitty Maid is here to save the day!

Starting to clean is hard.

But once you start, it can be lots of fun.

Say what you will about Rivers,

but he certainly does have an imagination.

And the facts are this.

He riddled that entire hotel

with cameras and microphones all wired up.

So many close calls. It's -- It's hard to have hope.

But this time it's just overly intricate and evolved enough.

And what a costume.

What a costume!

Agh!

Relax!It's just such a -- ugh!

Relax!To get close so many times,

I just need to release it all

beforehand so I don't get disappointed.

We have more to worry about.

I'm nervous for Agent Bendy Rivers.

Nervous for Agent Bendy Rivers?

He's four and a half layers up.

Yeah.Here in the Incan heavens.

Hanan Pacha it seems to be called.

But all previous celestial satellite imagery

shows this land was only hot springs.

Maybe it's a new hotel.

If it is, it's very new.

A very new hot spring hotel.

Strange.And look!

Energy readings for more babes.

Yeah, but Rivers is just pretending to be a babe.

It's not that simple!

These additional babes,

they seem to be appearing out of nowhere.

Multiplying at some odd rate.

I'm worried.I farted a little bit.

And I don't see them on camera yet.

Just shadows in the corners.

Babes just out of sight.

As far as I'm concerned if these babes

slow down Makasu, that's a good thing.

I'm just nervous about all the potential babes.

Things are not what they seem with these babes.

Dirty clothes go in the hamper.

Toys into the toy chest.

All the school work goes in your backpack.

And all this goes in the garbage.

Yuck! [ Purring ]

You hear Sonia and Bendy are separating?

Yeah, divorce is awkward.

♪♪

So what're you into these days?

Music, I think.

I like that. I like that.

Agh!

This is a fun hot spring.

I like the peppermint flavor part.

Reminds me of, uh, Christmastime.

I use to suck on the spear -- the spear end of the stick.

That's disgusting.

Make it sharp.

[ Chirping ]

Yup.

I didn't have many friends, but I'd walk around the creek

and I'd poke the eyes out of squirrels.

Real serial-killer stuff.

What?

I was wild.

Oh, yeah, seems like --What do you think of this one?

Well, it's kind of wet.

My stepdad really likes saunas.

[ Chirping, cooing ]

♪♪

I don't know why something being just uncomfortably hot enough

is hot and aw-- is great.

Yeah.

And it, well, the contrast with the weather outside.

Oh, well, that's true. That is kind of nice.

Like the different feel --

the different feeling of the weather outside

except when you're in the hot water.

Yeah, yeah, like you can get out and come back in

if you're feeling cold.Nice and brisk.

Yeah.See, that's what I like about

this hot spring right now is

Winter-Wonderland-themed with the peppermint.

Yeah, I do like the peppermint.

Oh, this one's cool. Jungle world.

Oh, wow! Look at all the vines.

I like the lemurs.

Aw, yeah.

Lemurs live in the jungle, right?

Yes.Oh, wow!

That's very interesting.

You ever --Flying Bear likes this one.

Yes, yeah. I, uh, I found this leaf.

Cool. All right.

♪♪

I'm bored of you talking.

I'm sorry.

I'm gonna go underwater.

[ Blowing ]Uh. Whaaa.

Oh.

They're touching me in the leg.

Ha-ha-ha, motorboat.

Yeah.

You can make your own bubbles.

Uh, oh, well, oh, all right, here I go.

[ Blowing ]

♪♪

Oh, wow, you're doing a flashlight.

Whoa! Yes, look at it.

I didn't realize your [bleep] is a flashlight.

Whoa!

I'm gonna click it.

Here we go.

Whoa!

I just wanna keep flipping the switch.

Whoa!Well, go ahead.

Nice.

Man, I could just lie in this one forever.

Oh, yes!

The theme here is Vegas gambling.

Gambling?

Vlegas -- Vlegas gambling.

Oh.Flay-gless gambling.

All right, let's go to the Big Bang Theory slot machine.

I like how this hot spring is just Tomatillo sauce.

Whoa! Yes!

Hmm.

I've got this.

Oh, okay.

Sure.

♪♪

I could definitely get used to this.

Oh! Ah! Uh! Uh! Uh!

Yes, I almost find my mind escaping me while I'm here.

Like I'm reminded of "first love's kiss."

Excuse me! Just getting any cobwebs off of you that I can.

Uh, you can leave my cobwebs. It's all good.

Bye!

We can afford to rest just one night, I think.

Have a good time catching Z's like the band ZZ Top.

God of Tennis, ZZ Top is the band

with the big, ugly beards.

Both: Good night, time pals!

I'll see you in the morning, if you know what I mean.

After we sleep!

[ Sighs ]

What a time this all has been.

At least I have a room all to myself.

[ Sobbing ]

Who could this mound of wiggling blankets be?

A spy?

Hyah!

Makasu.A spy?

Since we're not in front of the other girls,

I don't wanna be subtle anymore.

There's a fire in my landclam and my hose can't put it out.

Uh, this is so awesome,

but I can't get a boner right now

after merging so hard.

Please be waiting spread.

I'm gonna go see if I can boner pill.

Uh, find some.

Uh!

Ooh, um, uh, okay, shoot.

Uh, apologies!

I was so absorbed in my books.

They're all by Umberto Eco.

Hyugh! Nothing gets me wetter

than Italian semioticians!

[ Both moaning ]

[ Moans echoing ]

Uh, sorry, I can't easily have sex right now!

Ah, he's leaving.

Huh?

Can I help you?

Another woman? Uh.

How come I haven't met you yet?

Hmmm. Are you a sick boy?

Oh I dropped mommy's pen down my puff puff.

[ Distorted groaning ]

What the hell?! You pervert!

Huh? [ Grunts ]

But I secretly have a very angry crush on you.

Also, I'm a camouflaged sniper.

How many ladies even live here in this hotel?

Ah.

Oh, aren't you a beautiful, passionate, sneaky man.

I am a very sexy plant lady.

Holy heck!

Ah, my God!

Agh! Women, ladies, ah!

♪ You can never leave us

♪ Why even try?

So many ladies!

♪ We'll capture then enrapture you ♪

♪ No need to fight

♪ Give us your body and do what's right ♪

♪ Makasu

♪ Run, run, little coward, from the female gaze ♪

♪ We'll eat your beating heart then set your body ablaze ♪

♪ Destroying your flesh is the highest form of praise ♪

♪ Makasu

♪ Makasu

Ow! Dude!

The ventriloquist!

Listen, man, who the heck are all these ladies?

Earlier there was only three babes when

you were singing their song, and now there's like at least

two more babes and one's a plant.

And now I'm seeing, uh,

there's a bunch of scary eyes in the forest.

The implication being there are dozens of more ladies.

I don't know.

There aren't many good gigs out here

for a singing ventriloquist.

I responded to the ad just 'cause I needed money.

To be real with you,

this hot spring hotel wasn't even here yesterday.

When I got here, it was growing out of the clouds

in the moonlight, like silver spears of distracting sin.

I was alone.

And then, these women appeared.

They told me I had to sing for a sportsman.

What the hell is happening?!

I needed money!

No one hires ventriloquists!

[ Labored breathing ]

♪♪

♪♪

[ Groans ]

Huh! Don't tell me!

All the women in this hot spring hotel are made of meat!

They're treating the meat like women!

Huh!

You can't imagine

how hard it was to sneak into here.

Doing this whole good girl kitty cleaning act.

Nyan Nyan Kitty Maid?

Uh!You fool!

That was just a disguise!

Oh, wow!

I slipped in behind you guys when you summoned

the rainbow lightning to Hanan Pacha,

quickly disguised myself in whatever outfit

I had on hand,

found a ventriloquist

who was hired to serenade you with two women hiding underwater

and wrote him lyrics after bribing him

to include me in the song.

But, oh, am I glad to be away from those creepy ladies,

that flying bear, and your strange God friend.

No one here to help you anymore!

Bendy, I think you need to shut up

'cause I think we're in for a world of plaster pain!

If these ladies find out you're a secret lady,

not one of the real ladies of these fake ladies,

we're going to be in a slit pants forest cudge!

No! No tricking me now!

Woman: Aaah!

You ruined everything!

Hyah!

Ah! [ Gunshots ]

♪♪

Why couldn't you have just kissed them and been a good boy?

♪♪

Uh, crawling on my hands, uh.

Time to use you well, sweet little racket.

Makasu, I took a nighttime soak in the hot tub

and realized all the women we've seen weren't real

but made up with silver moon magic

and all of this has been a trap set by Mama Killa

to use a meat army of women

she's created to distract you with hot tubs and sex

and stop you from winning this tennis adventures.

At the same time, Bendy Rivers, the mortal detective,

pretended to be one of the women,

but he wasn't able to interfere much

because he's just a normal man,

and your tennis adventure is on a far bigger cosmic scale

than his small existence and maybe,

just maybe, he needs to accept that he's a speck among stars

and, Makasu, you're brilliant.

I -- Oh, I see you've, uh, learned yourself.

Who is she? Flying Bear!

[ Chirp ]

She's Mama Killa. The moon.

Ah.

Narrator: Mama Killa --

M-A-M-A K-I-L-L-A -- in Quechua,

Mama Killa's name directly translates to "mother moon."

The sister and wife of sun God Inti and daughter of Viracocha,

Mama Killa was considered

the third power in Inca mythology.

♪♪

Though primarily affiliated with the moon,

Mama Killa is also a goddess of marriage

and the menstrual cycle, considered a defender of women.

She also oversaw time and the calendar,

due to the fact that many rituals and feasts

were based upon the lunar cycle.

Silver was the metal of Mama Killa,

and gold for her husband, Inti.

It was said this gold was the sweat of the sun

and silver the tears of the moon

as they toiled and wept on behalf of humanity.

Both sacred metals, and both seen as opposites sides

yet equally vital parts of life, the masculine and the feminine,

which required each other

just as much as day required the night.

The Inca had a story about Mama Killa

that accounted for the dark spots

visible on the moon's face.

A fox fell in love with her because of her admirable beauty,

but when he rose into the sky to meet Mama Killa...

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

...she squeezed him so hard,

patches were created upon the moon's face.

♪♪

♪♪

Eclipses were seen as spiritually frightening events,

and specifically lunar eclipses

were associated with Mama Killa being in danger.

That, perhaps, an animal like a snake or mountain lion

would be attacking her.

Because of this, attempts were made to scare away this attacker

by throwing weapons, gesturing violently,

and making a lot of loud noise during these celestial events.

If the animal were to win its battle with Mama Killa,

it was believed that world would be left in darkness.

Even after the Spanish conquered the Inca,

traditions around eclipses persisted in native beliefs.

Because of this, the Spanish could use

their understanding of astronomy to their advantage and predict

when eclipses would take place, earning great respect

and possibly fear from the population.

At night, Mama Killa hovers sweetly in the air,

a reminder of celestial empathy and care,

that even when the sun disappears from view,

the Gods are with us, loving.

♪♪

Ahhhhh!

♪♪

You maggot.

Despicable leeching trash.

People have preyed on this continent for centuries.

Whatever, Mama Killa.

You know what I'm here for.

To finish the job.

But you will fail!

This Goddess is serious business,

also with very serious thighs!

Hyah!

How about I give you first serve?

Hyah. Ow!

I'm not gonna let you score even once.

Ouch! Ooh! Ow!

[Bleep] yeah, burns just like the moon burning.

Quit poking her moon ball. You'll damage your fingers.

True, I'll damage my fingers,

and I need them for tennis finger.

Huwahh!

♪♪

I loved my son.

A squirming little child,

a slug of love in my arms,

and with every cute yawn, a gust of wind would come

and blow the hair out of my eyes.

Fwaauuhhh!

♪♪

[ Sniffle-snort ]

How does it feel to kill someone's son?

A small wind boy?

Ah! Gah, my foot!

I've got a feeling your son Kon was, like,

almost permanently in a child form

because you don't age like me, normal boy, does.

I went form boy to adult.

But, what I'm saying is it's arbitrary for you to say,

"Oh, you've killed a boy" when he's been a boy

since like four hundred million years ago.

I don't really care.Ah!

Gahhh! Clearly!

[ Sobbing ] You monster!

Stomping through and leaving a scorched mess

wherever you go.

You nightmare! You monster!

You little worm!How do I pick up this ball?

It burns like the moon.

Hey, slimeball!

Aren't you listening to me?

Back pocket dimension Flying Bear?

Do Daddy a solid and hold the ball for me.

Uh.It's hot,

but I don't care if you hurt.

Thanks![ Disheartened chirps ]

Just a couple practice swings.

Hyah! Hyah! Hyah! Hyah!

Huah, huah!

Okay. Phew.

I think I'm ready![ Chirping ]

The big match between Mama Killa and Makasu,

a tennis dilemma with, uh, who knows whatever happens!

Hmpf. You've got this, Makasu.

♪♪

Now!

Grab! Moon! Smash!

Hueh!

♪♪

Hah!

[ Grunting ]

Menstrual star child!

Menstrual star child?

The next stage of life!

Hyaaah!

Agh, gosh!

Uh! Oh, no.[ Chirp ]

Agh! Luckily we had my bucket of spit.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[ Panting ] So much power!

Let it burrow in your wretched skull!

Wipe your thoughts and memories

from existence!

Uughhh. I gotta think!

[ Smug chuckle ]

Whoo, unh!

What a pathetic hit!

Are you burnt out already?

[ Groaning ]

♪♪

[ Echoing ] Spit bucket hyooo!

Huh? Did he return the ball?

[ Steam hissing ]

Hmpf! There it is!

♪♪

[ Scream echoing ]

No, Star Child!

♪♪

It's mine now.

My fertility?

[ Groaning ]

♪♪

Huahhhh!

Power float down.

Huahhhh.

I've been sucking in your god-family's energy

this whole journey, Mama Killa,

and I figured maybe this once, instead of being afraid,

I could actively use that to defeat you.

You were so intent on killing me outright, after all.

How did you --

But you needed to be vulnerable,

which is why I made the steam with my spit-bucket move.

During your blindness, my Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear

flew into my back pocket dimension.

Flying Bear covered itself with a plastic bag

in order to protect itself from the power of the sesho-seki,

the Japanese killing stone that I won from the Shinto spirits

when I defeated them in Ultimate Frisbee.

I always thought it was too difficult to use,

seeing as it kills anything it touches directly

but I confused your little menstruation star child

with a curveball swerve serve technique,

and it grazed its finger destroying the star child

and leaving your uterus open for my hands to reach in.

[ Groaning ]Shhh.

Shush, just die.

Game! Set! Match!

Bleblugbuhbelbhebheughbleh!

♪♪

♪♪

Wow! Now I know get what heaving feels like.

This is a wacky turn of events.

You look very good.

[ Cooing ]

Back Pocket Dimension's using my titties

as a bedroom for sleeping!

What a sweet boy slut, horny boy.

Shhh, shhh. You can sleep for three minutes

before I wake you up with a scream.

You -- you look very good.

Like a ripe fig.

Cool it, man.

Sexuality almost tempted Makasu

in Mama Killa's hot springs.

Uh. Don't let it

cloud your judgment. Uh.

Will this be harder than I thought?

143, 142, 141, 140.

That's it! I've had it!

Bendy Rivers! My nemesis!

Hyugh. Every time no matter what happens, you wiggle out!

Agh! This whole plan, this whole outfit,

I corner you for once

and this whole thing literally comes crumbling down!

But, Bendy, you can't do a shoot me if your gun fell down.

No, shh. The Chilean man is yelling.

Just try and sleep through it, okay?

No! You're just ignoring me!

Bendy, can you please keep it down?

My Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear slave

is only allowed to sleep several minutes a day

because I am a cruel owner and master, okay?

73, 72, 71,

70, 69 -- hehe --

68, 67, 66,

65, 64.

Bendy: No. I have to let go.

I haven't been happy for a decade.

All to fail at arresting you.

You've tricked me, hurt me, broke me.

Makasu, you win.

I don't really care.

Can you send me back to Earth?

Of course, mortal.

♪♪

-My sweet Almendra? -Bendy?

I don't want to be separated.

I don't want to divorce. -No, no, no.

I'm sorry, you can't just decide that.

This is a relationship. A conversation.

L-let me finish.

I found out who I want to be.

I don't want to waste any more time away from you.

I appreciate you saying this, but...

I want to come home

and be a Nyan Nyan Kitty Maid for our family.

Being dressed like this pretty kitty maid

is the happiest I've ever felt.

Will you have me, Sonia,

even if I'm a Nyan Nyan Kitty Maid?

Like a cat?

Listen, come home.

Let's take a walk in the park. We can talk about it.

I'll be a stay at home kitten maid nyan nyan.

I do still love you.

I'm sorry.

Makasu: 10, 9, 8,

7, 6, 5, 4, 3,

2, 1.

Huahhh!

You, uh, you look very good.

Like a -- Like a ripe fig.

Thanks, babe.

Huah!

Time keeps moving along

like a timid night lamp.

The treasure of South America feels so close though.

You're really doing your best.

Chair Umpire, back when we first met, you were right.

This has been my most difficult challenge yet.

This may be your most difficult challenge yet, Makasu.

Whoa! Are you saying I'm mentally challenged?

I gotta admit when I told you

that you were gonna absorb the Gods you defeated,

I didn't realize you'd find a way

to use it to win at tennis.

It's true. I might've suppressed it.

Just like the God of Tennis tells me to do

with all my feelings.

But now I have a few extra X chromosomes

because of the power of Mama Killa.

Though I refuse to master the powers of wind,

electricity, or water, or death.

Those Gods aren't as fun as the power of interest me

in the femininity.

Speaking of suppressing, God of Tennis,

are you trying to hide your wet dream you just had?

You should probably tuck your downstairs pants

[bleep] away, you little naughty boy.

I'm good! I'm fine now.

I'm normal again.

Hold on, guys.

As a chair umpire,

I am an impartial judge to the events occurring,

but it does not stop me from celebrating your successes,

which is why I've brought you the gift of dance.

Look at the tennis court now.

Oh, look, this part must be when I beat Ekeko in tennis

by giving him a fractal gift.

Yeah, yes, and now we go underwater, I think.

Or was it the underworld?

We went to the sky though too and defeated

Kon in the other one.

No, Supay was the underworld I think.

He had shiny eyes.

Sexy eyes. Guh.

You have kind of sexy eyes as well.

Right, no, sexy eyes, and this is the part of the dance

where you saved me by showing that his sexy eyes

were actually not big sexy eyes

but actually really tiny ugly tiny eyes.

And now the dancers confront the tricky colon.

The wormy dancer is pretending to be eaten

by the you-looking dancer.

Oh, yeah, cool.

And there being a frozen pisco sour drink now

to beat Mama Cocha at the game of tennis.

We sure have gotten ourselves out of some tight binds.

Mostly I did all the work, but I guess you were also there.

Now we go into the sky?

This seems out of order.It doesn't matter.

The dances are pretty self-contained.

I like how one dancer is up on the shoulders like that.

Ahh. But watch out.

Here comes Mama Killa to avenge the other Gods.

Yeah, right, God of Tennis.

Don't pretend you don't remember that I just now beat Mama Killa

at tennis by doing a spit-bucket trick,

killing the star baby with a death rock,

and stealing her fertility.

We just did that five minutes ago.

And see, now that the dancers danced

that they're just standing there

dancing the dance of us standing.

That was a very good recap dance.

♪ Don't give up

♪ On your dreams

♪ Never be awake

♪ Sleep forever

♪♪

♪ Generic Ambien

♪ Tune out the rest

♪ It's your sleepy quest

♪ Waking up is overrated

♪ Words get scrambled, not translated ♪

♪ Social bonds so fabricated

♪ And real life feeling isolated ♪

♪ Dream time ain't adulterated

♪ Souls, they ain't eviscerated ♪

♪ Do-do, do-do, do-dated

♪ Oh, I already stated

♪ Don't give up on your dreams ♪

♪ Never be awake

♪ Sleep forever

♪ Mommy needs just five more minutes ♪

♪ Sleep can solve any endeavor ♪

♪ Don't give up on your dreams ♪

♪ Never be awake and sleep forever ♪

♪ Bills pay themselves in your dreams ♪

♪ Leave out the food

♪ Your kids are clever

♪ It's okay

♪ Just let go of your

♪ Bodily functions

♪ Your brain now

♪ Sentient being

♪ You don't need

♪ Bodily functions

♪♪

[ Garbled voice ]

[ Garbled voice ]

[ Garbled voice ]

[ Garbled voice ]

♪♪

Huh! How about that?

El Presidente.

Which camera am I looking at?

Hi. I'm Maxime Simonet.

I'm the creator and director of this piece, also the star.

I play Makasu, and I'd like to thank you

for listening to me talk for five hours so far.

And being five hours into such an ep--

Let's wait for them to leave.

♪♪

My mother Vicky Whiting,

and my father [bleep].

Without them I wouldn't have been conceived.

Uh, special thanks to this brand of cola.

Special thanks to Hideo Kojima,

who I think is a large influence for me

and has such an autistic way

of telling stories that really resonates --

[ Background music stops abruptly ]

So, should we close that door here?

[ Music resumes ] Special thanks to these shoes

I've worn for about two years now.

Falling apart.

Shoelaces are nothing. If you look inside,

I don't even think the bottom is on correctly.

It looks like some horny dog just took a bite out of this.

It looks like some starving animal took a bite out of this.

Special thanks to Vietnam.

I mean, not Vietnam -- "Venture Bros.",

which took a break on production, a long hiatus,

to make sure we could execute this project,

which has so far cost $4 million,

and as you see this graphic on the screen

the number keeps going up.

Special thanks to the hours of hentai animations

I'd watch online, mainly when I was in high school,

programs such as "Bible Black,"

where those sisters were [bleep] each other.

Am I allowed to say that? We all love sisters.

I mean, like what -- it's like they have sisterly love

but also they're making each other nut.

Eva Angelina --

I think it was like a cam-- like, she was on web cam,

and when she was gonna orgasm, she said "I'm gonna nut."

And I still [bleep].

But pretty funny when a girl says she's gonna nut.

Like, good for her.

Special thanks to the remaining hour

of "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu," which honestly, is gonna --

I think it's gonna be really enlightening

to some young white men out there.

Please get on Pornosite, upload all of this onto

Pornosite, make sure people can watch this

with the commercials on Pornosite.

I wanna see those comments go up.

I wanna see dickgiggler76 write down in the comments,

"Whoa...

not really hot,

but, dang,

I love this."

Narrator: Few Gods remain on Makasu's greatest

journey into tennis treasures.

A towering broken creator deity

threatens to crush all of his dreams.

But are his worst fears within his friend group?

Break your TV into four pieces and then [bleep] the pieces.

♪♪

♪♪

Hmm. Looks like we're going straight through the place.

Mm-hmm. Looks like it.

Yes. Straight. Mm-hmm.

Viracocha was the supreme god,

created everything in the Incan mythos.

But he journeyed across the Pacific,

never to be seen again...Hmm.

...until he returned and retired here,

among the roots and the sea foam and the wrinkle rocks.

His age honestly made him a burden to the younger gods.

Ugh. No, don't remind me.

Old people. Ugh. The worst of all age groups.

[ Thinking ] Hmm. Except for my grandfather.

♪♪

♪ Everything is light

♪ Everything is light

♪♪

♪ Closer than Heaven and the underlay of things ♪

♪♪

♪ Everything is light

♪ Everything is light

♪♪

♪ Closer than Heaven and the underlay of thi-i-i-i-ngs ♪

♪♪

[ Singing in Japanese ][ Chirps ]

♪♪

♪ War breaks out every day

♪ War breaks out every day

♪ In the sunshine

♪♪

[ Singing in Japanese ]

♪♪

♪♪

[ Wind howling ]

[ Bird screeches ]

[ Snake slithers ]

[ Quacks ]

Viracocha's primordials line these halls.

I've always found them... unsettling.

You're just being a scaredy-pussy, God of Tennis.

Oh, my God, what was that?

Ooh! Ooh!What was that?

Huh?

Ohh. [ Shudders ]

♪♪

[ Hookah bubbles ]

Ah, this is some good stuff.

Ahh, I just love the bump-bump.

Like when you stir -- you spoon around a macaroni,

and it makes that squishy noise.

I wish this was forever.

Bump-bump for the rest of my life.

God, I'm so happy.

King Statue: It's not their fault.

I mean, I-I told them to do this.

I told them to do their bump-bump happy place.

I didn't tell them that it's all gonna be over

in about 25 minutes.

Look at them go, just bump-bump.

I mean, I love bump-bump.

I wish I could be bump-bumping right now.

Yeah, bump-bump's great.

But, you know, I've got the truth inside.

And you know the truth

just drives me right up like an arid winter.

It's fine that I'm dry.

I've been here before. Many times.

Few things get me out of it.

But, you know, here I am. Dry.

And the fabric of our slot in time

is about to be ripped right before us.

And none of those guys know.

They don't know. We know.

You changed the world, Robert.

There's no stopping this. It's time.

Everything ends, Robert. And everything begins again.

We're just experiments.

Some attempt at life.

A-A blip --A blip?

Mm, yeah, a blip.A blip.

Blip.I like that word.

Blip.Blip's a good word.

Blip. Yeah, blip.

♪♪

Ah, uh.

Those damn stone visions.

It all makes sense now.

Ah, forget about it.

These stone giants are just pissy

that they were an earlier attempt at existence,

sad because they aren't real

and this is the real world...

for now.

That also makes sense, I think.

[ Melancholy music plays ]

Thanks for touching me sometimes.

I know I can be weird about it, but thank you.

[ Chirps ]

Hey, Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear.

Me and the God of Tennis, we just shared a vision.

Isn't that wild?Oh [ chirps ]

Ugh! No, stop! You're being jealous,

and it's so controlling and emotionally abusive of you,

and I've had it up to here, which is my neck.

[ Melancholy music continues ]

[ Echoing ] Who...walks... among...the...primordial?

I...cannot...see...them.

Aaaaaaaaaah!

Makasu: Oh, whoa. Ooh.

It's hard to hold my foot on this. Ugh! Ugh!

[ Thinking ] Why am I holding my foot?

[ Bloop! ] I should let go of my foot.

[ Grunts nervously ]

I'm very bad with rumbling pillars,

the feeling of weightlessness,

like everything will fall beneath me.

Ku--[ Bloop! ]

I wish I could hold my foot.

Ugh! I can't grab my foot.

Y-Y-Yes. I understand.

Thanks for letting me hold you, pal.

It helps.

Viracocha: You are...

very good-looking.

Like...a ripe...fig.

Viracocha!

They've come to challenge you in tennis!

Hmm?

They...have...come...

to...tennis...you!

Ten...nis.

[ Rumbling ]Tennis.

Sorry, he's very old and annoying.

I was just saying earlier

that everything becomes annoying when it's old.

Except for old dogs. They get a little cute

until they grow blood balls all over their body

and whine all the time.[ Dogs whine ]

Old things are annoying.

How old are you, Chair Umpire? 25.

We...always...loved...tennis.

[ Stone crackles ]

Were you talking about dogs?

Yeah, he just said that old dogs

aren't as annoying as other old things,

because we're currently discussing

how old and annoying you are, sir.

I always liked dogs.

[ Thinking ] Does the universe age?

Some say I created it,

but so many beings are credited with that.

Creation -- It's a dime a dozen.

Were we created by those seeking a creator?

Aaaaaaaaaaah! A back and forth of beginnings and endings.

Like a match of tennis.

Chicken volleys with the egg.

Something must have come before all of that,

before whatever cycle of creation

led us to being here now.

An origin point?[ Twinkle! ]

A birth?

Does it have a beginning?

Does it have an end?

[ Muttering indistinctly ]

Are you...

the parasite...of me?

Or am I...

the parasite...of you?

[ Stone crackling ]

Tennis. So bright.

Like...the sun.

Like my son.

I wonder how my son is.

Viracocha -- the Incan creator of all things.

Father to Mama Killa and to Inti.

Inti. His name keeps coming up.

He's gonna be your final opponent,

if you can survive this old piece of shit.

Old, dusty shit dried.

The end...is...so very soon.

Aaaah!

I've come so far, man.

I've confronted my past, given gifts.

I've drank too much. I've changed genders, even.

My soul is a scrambled egg of screaming losers

all dancing like slutty marbles underneath my skin.

Huah! Are you prepared to join them, sir?

Perhaps.[ Warble ]

My serve?

Hyah! Go ahead, sir.

[ Tennis ball bounces ]

Aaaaaaah!

[ Stone crackling ]

Oooooh-ohhhhhhhh!

[ Rumbling ]

[ Warbling ]

Aw, man, this is slow and boring.

Hey, God of Tennis, is it rude when I say it's slow and boring?

In most cases, I'd say, yes, that was rude.

But rudeness seems to have fueled your drive for success,

and as I've always said,

politeness don't have no place

on no tennis court.

Yeah, you're right!

Aaaaaaaaaaah!

[ Rumbling ]

[ Rumbling continues ]

You know, in the time we've had to wait,

I-I managed to write a few spoken-word pieces.

Wow, I didn't know you did spoken word.

Well, it -- it also just --

It wasn't even a skill I had before we had to wait.

Oh, well.

[ Microphone feedback ][ Coughs ]

Thank you, uh, for showing us

that this is, indeed, a microphone

by illustrating the feedback sound effect,

Flying Bear.

Now it's my turn to cough.

Female Voice: Bristle-comb pines live more than 5,000 years.

Male Voice: Bark-ridged fingers sunk in stone.

Together: Watch the cathedrals rise from dust...

Female Voice: And melt like sidewalk salt.

Male Voice: But they also know fire.

Female Voice: And rots. And I want to grow old.

Male Voice: I want to feel my blood cool.

Let my parents' voices drop leaf-like from withered arms.

Female Voice: There's a dog waiting for me at a corner.

Male Voice: Rooms no one goes where they're young...

Female Voice: Rooms a little slower, a little more patient.

Together: And someday...

Male Voice: I will be the time of night

where the streets get empty.

I won't be alive, but I won't be you.

Female Voice: Barnacle on the skin of the world.

Male Voice: Virus sunk in spinal fluid.

Together: Unmoved.

Female Voice: It's more of a curse to stay unchanged.

Male Voice: Crater on a windless planet.

[ Fingers snapping ][ Chirps ]

[ Snap fingers ]

[ Rumbling ]

[ Tennis ball bounces ]Gasp!

Here it comes! Ah!

Oh, man!

[ Grunts ]

Here it comes! Ah!

Ah, here it comes!

[ Ball whooshing ]

[ Twinkle! ]Oh, man!

Here it comes!

Here comes the ball. Okay.

[ Whooshing continues ]

It is coming.

[ Whooshing continues ]

Narrator: "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu."

Uh, ga-- Okay, here it comes.

[ Tennis ball bounces ]

[ Ball whooshing ]

This is much like a -- a ruined orgasm.

A ruined orgasm?

Now, Makasu, I think that's rude!

Just recently, I asked you if something else was rude.

[ Thinking ] Time has lost all meaning.

[ Whistle blows ]Foul!

This is very boring.

And I was too nervous to say so earlier.

[ Thinking ] That damn chair.

Always nervous.

[ Whistle blows ]

I'll need to check my rule book

for a very specific ruling.

♪♪

The ball's going through puberty.

Hey, normally, you'd think the ball would have to drop

before it goes through puberty.

Got -- You know what I'm saying, Chair Umpire?

[ Whistle blows ]Please!

I'm already so nervous! Ah!

That damn chair!

Always nervous.

[ Whistle blowing ]

My ruling is that, in tennis, we can evoke the Nap Clause.

That's right! The famous Nap Clause.

This tennis rule states that if any volley

ends in one of the players taking a nap,

all formalities are out the window,

and violent measures are allowed to be used,

but on the flip side,

if someone murders the essence of the nap itself,

they become the Saint Nap Man...[ Snoring ]

...and must gift children and adults with naps

for the rest of eternity.

Yep, he's right.[ Snorting ] Uh, uh.

Everyone's being so boring and basic right now.

It's hard for me staying awake. Ugh!

Makasu! You've fallen asleep!

You're free to use violence to win!

Whoa, violence! Violence!

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear![ Chirps ]

Ahh! With my mastery of T-ball,

I defeated the Igbo god of justice and war, Kamalu,

and stole his sword, the Mmaagha Kamalu.

Uh, it was on the rolling savannas of Nigeria.

Legend says this sword glows evil when red is nearby.

Uh, the other way.

Legend says it glows red when evil's nearby.

I have yet to un-sheathe it,

but it reminds me of "Lord of the Rings."

Stinger, by Bilbo Baggin.

[ Grunts ]

This sexy piece of steel knows

that a mad broken god's hanging around.

[ Shing! ]And I guess you need to be brought to your knees

with the power of magical Nigerian sword.

[ Thinking ] Normally, Makasu defeats gods in sports

to weaken them, and could never match them in straight combat,

but Viracocha is so old and boring,

he stands no chance against one of the relics

Makasu stole from a Nigerian god

that only has one passing mention in Wikipedia

with no real cited sources.

[ Echoing ] Hyah! Hyong!

Grassland! Tremors! Of! War!

I...vibrate.

[ Warbling ]

[ Viracocha whimpers ]

[ Rumbling ][ Hissing ]

[ Gasps softly ]

Goodbye.[ Sloop! ]

Very good weapon. You're a good weapon.

Who's a good weapon? Mwah!

It's Mmaagha Kamalu. Mwah!

Huh? Why does it still sense evil?

Chair Umpire?

Aah! Oh, man!

Flying Bear? Ah!

[ Chirps ]

God of Tennis? Ah!

Come on, Makasu. Makasu?

It's just a Nigerian sword relic.

Am I the evil?

The whole time?

[ Breasts deflate ]

Oh, no.

[ Balloon deflates ]

Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man.

Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man.

[ Breathing heavily ] Wait, wait, wait.

Makasu, wait! Stop!

I shouldn't have listened to you, God of Tennis.

Stop!

[ Grunts ]

[ Sobs ]

Makasu-u-u-u-u-u!

[ Sobbing ] I'm evil! I'm evil!

What are you even saying?

It's been me. It's been me the whole time.

And you made me ignore it.

Supay tried to show me,

a-and, sure, it was a tactic to weaken me

to make me useless at tennis, but it's not like

I haven't used tricks to make people useless and weak.

A-And he was right, you know?

Think of that girl, the teacher, the -- the janitor,

the bully, the wife.

The freaking wife, man!

And -- And all the gods that just stood in my way --

the Norse, Egyptian, Japanese, Mayan, Polynesian,

Greek, Indigenous, American...

the Incan.

Your friends.

No, no, I told you.

They were aberrant. Lost.

That doesn't make sense!

Even when the heart is in the right place,

the soul of this land is a forgotten relic.

Relics! [Bleep] relics!

Maybe I wanted those relics 'cause they're, like,

a -- a direct, uh, measurement of my worth

or something.

It meant that I meant something.

People weren't enough for me to beat.

No, I had to have these nonsense trophies

'cause I don't have anything else

tying me to anything.

No family, no one that cares about me,

everyone bitterly looking at me

as some dumb overachiever at sports.

And I go around the world busting my ass all in my 20s

to just kill these gods and take what's theirs

and beat these fabrications of the human experience

just to prove some point that I mean something?

That I'm better? That I'm -- That I'm what?

That I'm what? That I'm what?!

It's almost like tennis should have been the end, you know?

Nice return, Makasu.

Remembering my grandfather

falling on the rac-quet-ball court...

Aah! Brain!

...should have stopped me, woken me up, kinda.

"You've done enough, you've taken enough,"

the sadness told me.

But you, God of Tennis --

You -- You made me push onwards.

You twisted my selective empathy,

and you manipulated me.

You wanted the treasure.

They needed to be laid to rest.

Rest? They're inside me,

like little whispers of spit under my tongue,

like slutty marbles in my skin.

I-I can't. This isn't normal.

None of this was normal, but that -- that's, like,

the least normal and worst part of it all.

Slap! [ Echoing ] Aah!

What, did Viracocha's dying spirit

give you an iota of self-awareness?

Or is it the fact that, this time,

you didn't tear your victim open

with a sport, but with a weapon?

Give it up, Makasu!

Slap! Aah!

You're greedy. You covet.

And you're ultimately alone.

I know this.

God of Tennis, you've instilled me

with affirmation after affirmation of my self-repression,

but the very deities you've helped me absorb are now...

[ Sighs ] They're clouding me.

They're clouding me right now.

Slap! Aah!

I can't do this.

Not with you...anymore.

[ Sword clangs ]

If I'm gonna finish this,

I can't be confused by your baloney.

I'll get the treasure of South America.

On my own.

And then I'll be done with it.

Don't follow me!

[ Sobbing ]

[ Chirping ]

♪♪

[ Sobbing continues ]

[ Thinking ] I'm completely alone.

[ Babbling indistinctly ]

I have so many conflicting feelings.

Why do I have so many feelings?

[ Babbling continues ]

Hup! Hup!

Hup! Hup!

[ Tennis ball bounces ]

[ Groans ]

[ Chuckles ] Hey, a little urn.

You know, I've always thought

those kids who just traveled around, uh, Europe and stuff --

You know, I always thought that they were avoiding something, right?

They're not really doing anything.

And they come back,

and they're like, "Oh, it's such an experience."

You just, like...[ Warbling ]

I bet you're wondering how I even got

this Back Pocket Dimension.

What sort of convenient pants does Makasu have?

How come, when I transformed into a woman,

my bikini bottoms still has a Back Pocket Dimension?

It's -- None of this makes -- I don't know, it's...

[ Urn shatters ]

To be honest, it's a metaphor.

[ Chirping ]

My Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear.

[ Chirps ]

I've gotta do this alone, Flying Bear.

[ Chirps ]

[ Pocket unzips ]Ugh!

♪♪

Take your air mattress,

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear.

You can't be my servant anymore.

[ Chirps ]

You dumb, horny bitch boy.

You can't come.[ Chirps ]

I never even cared about you, anyways.

Couldn't you see I treated you like garbage?

[ Chirps ] Of course not.

You're a stupid animal.

You're a stupid and horny bitch animal bitch!

♪ You walking away just hurts

♪ As plain as the pain of the tears on my fur ♪

♪ Your bullshit goodbyes as you don't apologize ♪

♪ Treat either of us what we're worth ♪

♪ You're thinking you're doing me good ♪

♪ Pushing me away 'cause you can ♪

♪ Not because you should

♪ You're just projecting through lies ♪

♪ As my blank, sorry eyes are nodding ♪

♪ Exactly as you thought they would ♪

♪ Thought they would

♪ Ooh-oooooooh

♪ Ooh-oooooooh

♪♪

[ Grunts ]

♪♪

[ Tennis ball bounces ]

Almost there.

[ High-pitched tone ]Oh, the light.

It's so loud.

It does evoke a wave of synesthesia,

being here, that is.

Makasu: Where is here?

Inti. It's Inti himself, this place.

It is it is place.

We are at...him.

At him? At'm.

Atum.

Up and attem.

Inti, husband of Mama Killa, leader of the Incan gods,

son of Viracocha, father to Kon, and god of the sun.

It feels so...

overwhelmingly empty,

for a place that is a someone.

Though it is him, it also lacks him at the moment.

At the moment. ATM.

At'm. Atum.

You know, it's the only thing I do.

What is? Umpire things. As a chair.

Oh, really? I would have never guessed.

I liked doing it.

Kinda gave me a -- a -- a raison d'etre.

Oh, raisin -- raisin death.

Ooh, raisin death. I like it when you said "raisin death."

It's fun to do these rhymes. To find the things that rhyme.

You know, you're very good at sports.

I feel like, if they were more themselves,

they would have appreciated a mortal like you,

despite your flaws.

My greedy killing streak?

It's not like gods don't have

a huge death toll on their heads.

I mean, people sacrifice children on their gods.

What? No.

Do they meet judgment, uh, you know, after?

Do you?

Uh, I don't think I've cut my own fingernails

since I was 12 or something.

♪♪

[ Whispering ] What do we do?[ Whispering ] I don't know.

I don't have much of a point beyond the games.

It's kind of in my name.

I am the titular Chair Umpire.

Even though sometimes I get nervous.

Titular.

Titty bur-- Ugh, titty burn.

I don't like that one -- titty burn.

It doesn't -- "Titty burn" does not sound like "titular."

That's weird.

At'm. Atum.

Must be crazy having your life be defined by tennis.

[ As Matthew McConaughey ] [ Sighs ] It's just what I do.

It's just who I am. Matthew McConaughey.

I bet you had a lot to talk about

with the God of Tennis, though. Excuse me?

Yeah, you know, the French God of Tennis

from the old French pantheon, and when they fell apart,

he came to South America and he hung out with the Incans

'cause they love tennis and he loves tennis.

He was my partner, you know, for a while.

The blue guy?

I thought he was with you. Huh?

Y-Yeah, there's no French pantheon, anyways.

And there's no God of Tennis.

I'm pretty sure I'd be the first to know

since I'm all about tennis.

Atom.

Atom.

Like the atom bomb.

[ Explosion ]

Narrator: "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu."

[ Whimpers ]Makasu.

[ Whimpers ]

Don't act like it's something you should have always known.

You learned right on time.

I don't understand. W-We held hands.

And you are an incredibly soft boy.

[ Tennis ball bounces ][ Whimpers ]

It's also frustrating how gorgeous you are

when you don't get it.

You naturally stomp through ignorance.

All I needed to do

was nudge you further down that path.

You have a reputation, after all.

You always get what you want.

And you stay stuck in your own head,

skirting by on your natural gifts and luck,

trampling on the lawns behind you

as you sing to yourself on the horizon.[ Shing! ]

I'm not really sure what's going on.

I'm freaking --[ Shing! ]

Inti and God of Tennis: A flesh puppet is exhausting to inhabit for so long.

Makasu: Who's talking right now?

And where f-- is, uh, your voice from?

Inti: Come on, you piece of shit.

You think I'd use my actual voice

when inhabiting a flesh puppet by your side?

Man, the fact that being in a meat mannequin like that

reduces me to primal mortal urges

to make love to you terrifies me.[ Whimpers ]

It's good to be back in me!

Oh, God. Why?

It's not like I could come straight to you myself.

I am the Sun, after all.

They'd notice if I was missing.

But now you're here.

♪♪

You're so bright.

A man after my own heart. How sweet.

But the truth is,

I've been dying slowly, just like the others.

So I kinda pricked you with a little soul vacuum,

had you obliterate everyone I ever loved

so their power could be pulsing in your little skull

when you get here.

♪♪

Time is snuffing me, Makasu.

I need a log,

a thick piece of wood just teeming with juice

to light and kindle the solar system.

It's kind of...my job.

♪♪

You can't blame me.

The evil intentions sensed by Mmaagha Kamalu.

It was you. While you were puppeting

the meat puppet God of Tennis puppet.

Oh, my God!

I've never seen someone go from such self-loathing

to pinning all that negativity on someone else so fast.

Face it, we're both probably the bad ones.

But at least I serve a purpose.

I make plants grow and give old ladies booby tans.

And do solar-powered scooters.

You just take.

Which is why I don't feel too bad for the fact

I'm going to be gleefully burning you

within and without me

until we're one large, perfect, celestial

[echoing] object!

♪♪

No, no, no!

♪♪

I'm not letting it end like this, Inti!

Back Pocket Dimension Flying Bear!

Wait. No!

It's pretty convenient for me

that you pushed your little bear servant away,

isn't it?

What a cute, little bear slave.

I'm -- I'm burning!

Just starting to.

No! [ Whimpers ]

[ Chirping ]

My servant![ Chirps ]

My bear from my Back Pocket Dimension.

I'm gonna help you, Makasu.

[ Flames whoosh ]

[ Tennis ball bounces ]

No!

How could you?

Don't pretend you care now!

Well, you know what? I've still got a hand.

Huh! Aaron's rod from Exodus,

used to spread plague.

I beat Aaron in a slam-dunk contest.

Uh, Ukonvasara, the Finnish god Ukko's thunder hammer.

Kind of a rip-off of Mjolnir, honestly,

but I beat him in a hockey con-- Oh, my God!

[ Whimpers ] Yagrush and Ayamur,

the clubs crated by Kothar in Phoenician mythology

and used by Baal to defeat Yam,

which I stole from Baal in a game of Coin Quest.

Wait! No!

I can't. You're burning everything!

To a crisp!

Surrender yourself to the furnace, Makasu.

[ Sobbing ] No!

No! I won't!

I won't surrender!

[ Babbling indistinctly ] No!

Hyuh!

I challenge you to tennis!

Hyuh! Hyuh! Hyuh!

I challenge you, Inti, to tennis!

[ Whooshing ]

♪♪

You've always been [echoing] brilliant.

Uhhhhhhnnn...

Noooooo...

Ohhhhhh...

Whoooa...

No...

Nooooo...

Why were you...

[ Echoing ] Your.

Serve.

[ Folk music playing ]

Bendy Rivers: You're a good kid, Makasu.

I mean it.

♪ The game is over, the game was lost ♪

♪ To centuries of a churning sun ♪

♪ A yellow star

♪ Like a tennis ball just rolling through the sky ♪

[ Echoing ] Game. Set. Match.

♪ We play for keeps, and we lost it all ♪

♪ Racquets broke, and our souls not far ♪

♪ Fadin' off

♪ To a Sunday afternoon Sun ritual ♪

♪♪

♪ We're livin' proof

♪ There's nothing left to hold

♪ Just let it go

♪♪

♪ We were young when this began ♪

♪♪

♪ And now we're old, there's nothing left to stand ♪

♪ For anymore

♪ Just let the castle fall

♪ Just let it go

♪♪

♪ Let your death dance in, smiling eclipse ♪

♪♪

♪ Let the sports be won on your fingertips ♪

♪♪

♪ Grab the game, turn the key

♪ The sun is rising

♪ The sun is rising

♪ The sun is rising

[ Warbling ]

♪♪

[ Laser fires ]

♪♪

♪♪

[ Laser fires ]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[ Warbling ]

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

[ Rock music playing ]Narrator: Put down all those tired,

old "Gammeu Setto Machu Picchu" action figures

and grab one of the most sought-after action figures

of this or any century.

It's the sun god, Inti!

[ Whoosh, sizzle ]

Can we get Lou in here to clean this up?

Uh-huh. Yeah, they're incinerated.

Yeah, yeah, Susie.

Uh, they signed the waiver, right?

I mean, we got signatures on everything?

We're covered? Okay, good.

Well, I just -- I guess we'll get art department

to slap on a warning on the box,

or actually not have the kids open it next time we shoot it.

Okay.

All right, well, I guess I'll see you this weekend.

Yeah, I'm excited. I never rode a roller coaster before,

so that'll be new.

I hear they go up --

Upside-down?

I don't know if that's -- I-I can do that.

Is there one that doesn't do that?

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