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Arliss: For most of us,
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00:00:13,646 --> 00:00:16,216
the dream of becoming a champion
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00:00:16,282 --> 00:00:18,552
remains a fantasy.
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00:00:18,618 --> 00:00:20,548
But for a special few,
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00:00:20,620 --> 00:00:23,060
it is very much a reality.
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00:00:23,122 --> 00:00:24,392
We cheer them.
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00:00:24,457 --> 00:00:25,987
We live through them.
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Athletes are our last warriors.
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00:00:29,128 --> 00:00:32,628
My job is to make
their dreams come true.
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My name is Arliss Michaels.
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I represent athletes.
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These are my stories.
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00:00:39,739 --> 00:00:43,139
♪ Don't know what it is
that makes me love you so ♪
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00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:46,879
♪ I only know I never
wanna let you go ♪
15
00:00:46,946 --> 00:00:50,376
♪ 'Cause you started
something, oh, can't you see ♪
16
00:00:50,450 --> 00:00:54,050
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
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00:00:54,120 --> 00:00:57,660
♪ It happens to be true ♪
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00:00:57,724 --> 00:01:01,494
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
19
00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:04,931
♪ I just wanna be
beside you everywhere ♪
20
00:01:04,998 --> 00:01:08,668
♪ As long as we're
together, honey, I don't care ♪
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00:01:08,735 --> 00:01:12,005
♪ 'Cause you started
something, oh, can't you see ♪
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00:01:12,071 --> 00:01:15,741
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
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00:01:15,808 --> 00:01:19,378
♪ No matter what you do ♪
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00:01:19,445 --> 00:01:22,075
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
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00:01:22,949 --> 00:01:24,549
(applause)
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00:01:24,617 --> 00:01:26,247
Bob Costas: Thank you.
27
00:01:26,319 --> 00:01:27,619
Thank you, ladies and gentlemen.
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00:01:27,687 --> 00:01:29,287
It's a great pleasure
to be here tonight.
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Arliss: December 17, 1995.
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00:01:32,659 --> 00:01:36,029
A date I will never forget.
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It was the night I was honored
as "A Man of Our Times"
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00:01:39,832 --> 00:01:42,602
by the Give a Damn Foundation.
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00:01:42,669 --> 00:01:44,469
A man worthy of our admiration
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00:01:44,537 --> 00:01:46,567
and our friendship,
Arliss Michaels.
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00:01:46,639 --> 00:01:50,479
(applause)
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00:01:50,543 --> 00:01:53,383
Arliss: The fact that I, an
agent, was to be honored,
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00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:54,876
had me dumbstruck.
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00:01:57,383 --> 00:02:00,053
The reality of it
had finally sunk in.
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00:02:00,119 --> 00:02:01,119
How much?
40
00:02:01,187 --> 00:02:02,857
A hundred and fifty thousand.
41
00:02:02,922 --> 00:02:03,922
But it's deductible.
42
00:02:04,724 --> 00:02:06,394
From my pocket!
43
00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:07,889
L... let me get this straight.
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00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:13,501
It is costing me $150,000 to
be named "Man of Our Times"?
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00:02:13,566 --> 00:02:15,936
It's a fund... raiser.
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You know how these things work.
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00:02:17,403 --> 00:02:20,413
They honor someone who they
think can get clients and friends
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00:02:20,473 --> 00:02:23,443
to sponsor tables
at $10,000 a pop.
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00:02:23,509 --> 00:02:24,939
They're hoping to raise 400,000.
50
00:02:25,011 --> 00:02:26,111
And...?
51
00:02:26,179 --> 00:02:28,109
And they raised 250.
52
00:02:28,181 --> 00:02:32,021
So they expect me
to cover the rest?
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00:02:32,085 --> 00:02:34,415
Do you want them to announce
that you raised less money
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00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:35,487
than last year's honoree?
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I don't know, who was it?
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00:02:37,123 --> 00:02:39,693
O.J.
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Arliss: Nothing makes me feel
better than giving away my money.
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00:02:44,230 --> 00:02:47,930
My checkbook is a
testament to my generosity.
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00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:53,811
I give with a smile on my face
and with no strings attached.
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00:02:53,873 --> 00:02:58,513
Be sure I get a full-page ad in the
program saluting me from Anonymous.
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00:02:58,578 --> 00:03:01,178
In addition to executive
assistant Rita Wu,
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00:03:01,247 --> 00:03:04,577
my crack support staff is
anchored by Kirby Carlisle,
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00:03:07,020 --> 00:03:10,090
former classmate, and my
colleague from the very beginning.
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00:03:10,156 --> 00:03:11,956
Kirby is like my brother.
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00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:14,655
I could always tell
what he's thinking.
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00:03:16,195 --> 00:03:17,325
How much?
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00:03:19,832 --> 00:03:23,742
Thirty... five, uh,
thousand dollars.
68
00:03:23,803 --> 00:03:27,913
You lost $35,000
on a football game?
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00:03:27,974 --> 00:03:31,914
Uh, actually it was
10,000 on... football,
70
00:03:31,978 --> 00:03:35,378
and uh... 10,000 on baseball,
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00:03:35,448 --> 00:03:39,718
and... 15,000,
uh, on basketball.
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00:03:39,786 --> 00:03:42,286
Oh, great, great. Why
didn't you just bet on hockey?
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00:03:42,355 --> 00:03:44,355
(chuckles) Hockey?
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00:03:44,424 --> 00:03:46,234
What the fuck do I
know about hockey?
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00:03:46,292 --> 00:03:47,532
Jesus.
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00:03:47,593 --> 00:03:48,833
Boss, it was a sure thing.
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00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:51,325
Look, look, Kirb, Kirb.
We have been through this.
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00:03:51,397 --> 00:03:54,397
You know, we represent
professional athletes here.
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00:03:54,467 --> 00:03:56,167
You can't be betting
on ball games.
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00:03:56,235 --> 00:03:58,195
It looks like you have
inside information.
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00:03:58,271 --> 00:04:00,241
Augh... That's
what I thought, too!
82
00:04:00,306 --> 00:04:03,476
Kirby, I'm washin'
my hands of this thing.
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00:04:03,543 --> 00:04:05,513
Oh, no, no. Boss, boss...
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00:04:05,578 --> 00:04:06,848
you've gotta loan me the money.
85
00:04:08,948 --> 00:04:11,118
I mean, these guys
mean business.
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00:04:13,319 --> 00:04:15,119
They wanna break my foot.
87
00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:17,759
You gotta help me.
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00:04:20,126 --> 00:04:22,926
Arliss: Being an agent,
obstacles constantly arise.
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00:04:22,995 --> 00:04:26,495
But in truth, it really all comes
down to the same thing...
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00:04:26,566 --> 00:04:27,766
How much?
91
00:04:27,834 --> 00:04:29,074
All of it.
92
00:04:29,135 --> 00:04:30,395
Three million dollars.
93
00:04:30,470 --> 00:04:31,840
You can't do that.
94
00:04:31,904 --> 00:04:34,414
You're contracted
to exclusively sponsor
95
00:04:34,474 --> 00:04:36,644
Sebastian and Nicky's
Ice Extravaganza.
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00:04:36,709 --> 00:04:38,509
I got a 30-city sold out tour!
97
00:04:38,578 --> 00:04:40,408
As you know, we at Bristol-Myers
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00:04:40,480 --> 00:04:43,580
want to project a clean,
wholesome, family-type image.
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00:04:43,649 --> 00:04:45,179
As do we at Wal-Mart.
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00:04:45,251 --> 00:04:46,951
I don't understand.
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00:04:48,421 --> 00:04:50,891
Sebastian and
Nicki are the epitome
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00:04:50,957 --> 00:04:52,727
of family entertainment.
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00:04:52,792 --> 00:04:55,162
"Grimm's Fairy Tales... on Ice."
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00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:57,228
"Sleeping Beauty... on Ice"!
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00:04:57,296 --> 00:04:59,866
"Rumpelstiltskin... on Ice."
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00:04:59,932 --> 00:05:02,542
We're concerned about the
theme of this year's show.
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00:05:04,337 --> 00:05:09,277
It's a Horatio Alger story.
A classic rags-to-riches tale.
108
00:05:09,342 --> 00:05:11,482
Don't tell me you
don't like Horatio Alger.
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00:05:11,544 --> 00:05:13,884
It's not because we
don't like Horatio Alger.
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00:05:13,946 --> 00:05:15,746
It's because of the poster.
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00:05:15,815 --> 00:05:17,015
The poster?
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Yes! Look!
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00:05:18,885 --> 00:05:21,085
Arliss: Arliss
Michaels presents...
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00:05:21,154 --> 00:05:23,824
Sebastian and Nicki,
America's Darlings,
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00:05:23,890 --> 00:05:27,560
in Horatio Alger's
"'Ragged Dick' On Ice!"
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00:05:29,762 --> 00:05:33,072
Well, as you can
see, it... it looks like...
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00:05:33,132 --> 00:05:34,282
well, it... could
be construed as...
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00:05:34,300 --> 00:05:37,040
It looks like we're
talking about his schlong.
119
00:05:37,103 --> 00:05:39,043
Look, you know how
sensitive my clients are.
120
00:05:39,105 --> 00:05:41,135
They want family values.
121
00:05:41,207 --> 00:05:46,477
Wait a minute... are you
saying that this is a deal breaker?
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00:05:46,546 --> 00:05:47,746
That's a possibility.
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00:05:47,814 --> 00:05:49,054
A strong possibility.
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00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,924
I don't respond
very well to threats.
125
00:05:57,757 --> 00:06:00,357
And before I get very upset,
126
00:06:00,426 --> 00:06:02,656
and say something
very foolish...
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00:06:02,728 --> 00:06:05,128
I'm just gonna walk out that
door and compose myself.
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00:06:05,198 --> 00:06:06,368
Excuse me.
129
00:06:10,937 --> 00:06:12,637
Look out! Look
out! Look out, here!
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00:06:12,705 --> 00:06:15,005
Comin' through! Hot
soup! Hot soup! Hot soup!
131
00:06:15,074 --> 00:06:16,074
Hot soup! Hot soup!
132
00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:20,551
Stanley, quick. What are the
projections for the ice show?
133
00:06:20,613 --> 00:06:24,423
Okay. Ticket sales
being what they are,
134
00:06:24,483 --> 00:06:27,423
and saying that Ticketmaster
doesn't try to appropriate
135
00:06:27,486 --> 00:06:29,256
any more than their usual share,
136
00:06:29,322 --> 00:06:33,332
I'd estimate a gross between
nine million to nine-seven-five,
137
00:06:33,392 --> 00:06:35,602
making our take about 900,000.
138
00:06:35,661 --> 00:06:39,171
Nine hundred thousand. Now,
if I've gotta change the poster
139
00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:40,902
and the campaign,
what's that gonna cost?
140
00:06:40,967 --> 00:06:43,667
Well, that depends...
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00:06:43,736 --> 00:06:48,106
You have to add,
uh... new key artwork.
142
00:06:48,174 --> 00:06:50,944
New distribution costs.
Add our overhead...
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00:06:51,010 --> 00:06:52,210
(bell dings)
144
00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:56,318
New television trailer.
New marketing costs.
145
00:06:56,382 --> 00:06:57,522
Add our overhead...
146
00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:58,583
(bell dings)
147
00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:00,818
New... t-shirt design.
148
00:07:00,887 --> 00:07:03,687
Newwww theme song...
149
00:07:03,756 --> 00:07:05,856
and...
150
00:07:05,925 --> 00:07:06,955
adding our overhead...
151
00:07:07,026 --> 00:07:07,886
(bell dings)
152
00:07:07,960 --> 00:07:09,600
I'd say about 50,000.
153
00:07:09,662 --> 00:07:11,032
Fifty thousand.
154
00:07:11,097 --> 00:07:12,827
- Thanks.
- Is something up?
155
00:07:12,899 --> 00:07:16,039
Yeah. Horatio Alger
just lost his ragged dick.
156
00:07:18,537 --> 00:07:21,307
Good friends...
157
00:07:21,374 --> 00:07:23,784
what we have here is
a very delicate situation.
158
00:07:23,843 --> 00:07:25,813
However, as a favor to you,
159
00:07:25,878 --> 00:07:27,678
I will present the
situation to Sebastian,
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00:07:27,747 --> 00:07:30,217
and do my best to assure
a satisfactory adjustment.
161
00:07:30,983 --> 00:07:32,253
We appreciate that.
162
00:07:32,318 --> 00:07:33,948
We appreciate that greatly.
163
00:07:34,020 --> 00:07:37,690
However, I want it
understood that this adjustment
164
00:07:37,757 --> 00:07:39,827
is going to affect the budget.
165
00:07:39,892 --> 00:07:41,232
The budget?
166
00:07:41,294 --> 00:07:44,604
Well, yes, if we're gonna have
to change the whole campaign,
167
00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:48,634
there's gonna be additional
art costs, marketing costs,
168
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:49,741
distribution costs...
169
00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:50,742
How much?
170
00:07:50,803 --> 00:07:53,373
Then there's additional
wardrobe costs,
171
00:07:53,439 --> 00:07:57,279
music costs... as a favor to
you, I'll waive my overhead...
172
00:07:57,343 --> 00:07:59,413
How much?
173
00:07:59,478 --> 00:08:01,908
I would say we're
looking somewhere
174
00:08:01,981 --> 00:08:03,851
in the neighborhood of...
175
00:08:03,916 --> 00:08:07,786
(cash register ringing)
176
00:08:07,853 --> 00:08:12,733
(opera music playing)
177
00:08:20,366 --> 00:08:23,396
Arliss: Each client brings with
them a different set of objectives.
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00:08:23,469 --> 00:08:26,739
Each has their own
unique individuality.
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00:08:26,806 --> 00:08:28,636
They are artists.
180
00:08:28,708 --> 00:08:30,878
My job is to encourage
them, nurture them,
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00:08:30,943 --> 00:08:34,113
and allow that
individuality to flourish.
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00:08:40,720 --> 00:08:43,960
(opera music continues)
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00:08:47,593 --> 00:08:51,463
Arliss: (clapping)
Bravo! Bravo! Bravo!
184
00:08:51,530 --> 00:08:53,630
- Arliss, Arliss!
- Nicki Nicole!
185
00:08:53,699 --> 00:08:54,699
Arliss!
186
00:08:56,168 --> 00:08:58,298
How's the queen
of the silver skates?
187
00:08:58,371 --> 00:09:00,271
(sighs) Be honest
with me, Arliss.
188
00:09:00,339 --> 00:09:02,009
- What?
- Do I look heavy?
189
00:09:02,074 --> 00:09:04,444
What? What? You look great.
190
00:09:04,510 --> 00:09:06,710
In fact, you look great!
191
00:09:06,779 --> 00:09:09,119
Aw, thanks, but you know how
hard it is to keep this weight off.
192
00:09:09,148 --> 00:09:10,848
I know, I know.
193
00:09:10,916 --> 00:09:14,016
So um... how is our boy?
194
00:09:14,086 --> 00:09:15,816
Him? He's in a mood.
195
00:09:15,888 --> 00:09:19,288
Yeah? Is it a good
mood or a bad mood?
196
00:09:19,358 --> 00:09:22,028
Does it matter? Give him
five minutes, it'll change.
197
00:09:22,094 --> 00:09:23,334
Anyway, I gotta go throw up.
198
00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:24,496
All right. Have fun.
199
00:09:29,435 --> 00:09:32,435
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey,
how's the king of the frozen floor?
200
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:34,765
Never felt better in my life.
201
00:09:34,840 --> 00:09:37,210
That's great. Look, um...
202
00:09:37,276 --> 00:09:38,876
Sebastian, we gotta talk.
203
00:09:38,944 --> 00:09:41,914
Now I know you're really
fond of this Horatio Alger piece,
204
00:09:41,981 --> 00:09:45,151
but some of the sponsors are
expressing some kind of reservations
205
00:09:45,217 --> 00:09:46,047
about showcasing it.
206
00:09:46,118 --> 00:09:47,788
Fine, lose it.
207
00:09:47,853 --> 00:09:49,463
Lose it?
208
00:09:49,522 --> 00:09:50,922
It's history, okay?
209
00:09:51,857 --> 00:09:52,857
Great!
210
00:09:52,925 --> 00:09:54,185
How do I look?
211
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:55,430
You look great.
212
00:09:55,494 --> 00:09:57,004
I feel great.
213
00:09:57,063 --> 00:09:58,603
Great!
214
00:09:58,664 --> 00:10:00,274
You know why?
215
00:10:00,332 --> 00:10:03,772
Why? Because you've got a
30-city sold out tour about to start!
216
00:10:03,836 --> 00:10:04,836
Nope.
217
00:10:04,870 --> 00:10:06,310
No? Because you and Nicki
218
00:10:06,372 --> 00:10:08,772
are the most popular
skating team in history.
219
00:10:08,841 --> 00:10:11,881
♪ I'm as corny as
Kansas in August ♪
220
00:10:11,944 --> 00:10:15,284
♪ I'm as happy
as blueberry pie ♪
221
00:10:15,347 --> 00:10:16,947
You're doing "South Pacific"?
222
00:10:17,883 --> 00:10:19,293
I'm getting married.
223
00:10:20,586 --> 00:10:21,886
Great! Great!
224
00:10:21,954 --> 00:10:24,224
Congratulations! I
mean, I had no idea.
225
00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:25,660
This is rather sudden, isn't it?
226
00:10:25,724 --> 00:10:30,034
I suppose. But Robo
and I are so simpatico.
227
00:10:31,197 --> 00:10:32,467
Robo?
228
00:10:32,531 --> 00:10:35,171
Actually, it's Roberto. But
everyone calls him Robo.
229
00:10:35,234 --> 00:10:36,744
Roberto?
230
00:10:36,802 --> 00:10:38,902
He's Prince
Charming, in the finale.
231
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:41,271
Prince Charming. He's
gonna marry Prince Charming.
232
00:10:42,975 --> 00:10:44,975
Actually, he's the understudy.
233
00:10:45,044 --> 00:10:46,414
But think of the symbolism.
234
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:49,549
Here I am, looking all my
life for Prince Charming,
235
00:10:49,615 --> 00:10:51,445
and he's actually
Prince Charming.
236
00:10:51,517 --> 00:10:52,517
Isn't that a hoot?
237
00:10:54,787 --> 00:10:59,327
He's gonna marry
Prince Charming.
238
00:10:59,391 --> 00:11:01,761
What if we had the
ceremony on ice?
239
00:11:01,827 --> 00:11:04,197
What do you mean,
"ceremony on ice"?
240
00:11:04,263 --> 00:11:08,103
Opening night, the grand finale.
241
00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:11,197
Have a big ceremony.
242
00:11:11,270 --> 00:11:13,570
Sebastian, I really think
we should think this over,
243
00:11:13,639 --> 00:11:16,209
I mean, this... (chuckles)
this is a pretty bold move!
244
00:11:16,275 --> 00:11:18,475
Sebastian: Don't you understand?
245
00:11:18,544 --> 00:11:20,814
♪ I'm in love, I'm
in love, I'm in love ♪
246
00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:25,050
♪ I'm in love, I'm in love
with a wonderful guy! ♪
247
00:11:29,755 --> 00:11:33,285
Arliss: All my clients know
that to me, they're family.
248
00:11:33,359 --> 00:11:34,789
LaTrelle's in there.
249
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:36,230
(glass breaking)
250
00:11:41,700 --> 00:11:45,440
Hey, hey, hey, how's the
king of the defensive backs?
251
00:11:45,504 --> 00:11:47,514
They took my
motherfuckin' Benz, man!
252
00:11:47,573 --> 00:11:50,683
Okay, relax. Relax,
now who took your car?
253
00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:53,583
The man! Mr. Charlie!
254
00:11:53,646 --> 00:11:56,646
You know, motherfuckin'
creditors and shit, man!
255
00:11:56,715 --> 00:11:59,385
Brand new fuckin'
Benz, too, man, damn!
256
00:11:59,451 --> 00:12:01,491
And now they're tryin'
to take my crib, man!
257
00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:04,924
Uh, I believe I explained to you that
that house was beyond your means.
258
00:12:04,990 --> 00:12:06,730
Hey, I'm LaTrelle Shabazz, baby.
259
00:12:06,792 --> 00:12:08,292
I'm the greatest defensive back
260
00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:10,600
this entire league
has ever seen.
261
00:12:10,663 --> 00:12:13,773
You have to learn to
curb your spending.
262
00:12:13,832 --> 00:12:16,642
I got my moms. I
got two ex-wives,
263
00:12:16,702 --> 00:12:19,102
five kids, and a girlfriend.
264
00:12:19,171 --> 00:12:21,711
I got back alimony,
child support.
265
00:12:21,774 --> 00:12:23,954
Y'all motherfuckers need to
get me some new endorsements.
266
00:12:23,976 --> 00:12:25,506
Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
267
00:12:25,578 --> 00:12:26,778
We've been through this.
268
00:12:26,845 --> 00:12:29,815
No one will touch you.
You broke a morals clause
269
00:12:29,882 --> 00:12:31,452
on your Ben and
Jerry's contract.
270
00:12:34,220 --> 00:12:35,850
Oh, man, fuck that!
271
00:12:35,921 --> 00:12:37,761
That girl looked older, man!
272
00:12:37,823 --> 00:12:40,533
Bes... besides, what's that
gotta do with crunchy caramel?
273
00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:42,997
I made a mistake.
274
00:12:43,062 --> 00:12:45,062
Must you get them
pregnant all the time?
275
00:12:45,130 --> 00:12:47,170
Two times ain't
all the time, man.
276
00:12:47,233 --> 00:12:49,173
Okay, that's enough.
That's enough!
277
00:12:49,235 --> 00:12:53,465
Look... Arliss. I
need money, man.
278
00:12:53,539 --> 00:12:57,479
My investments suck. I
need money now, Arliss.
279
00:13:04,250 --> 00:13:05,650
Arliss: To best
service my clients,
280
00:13:05,718 --> 00:13:07,718
I go straight to the top.
281
00:13:09,855 --> 00:13:12,555
Arliss, I hope you
don't mind puffed rice.
282
00:13:12,625 --> 00:13:17,025
I've got my cholesterol up since I let
Jimmy Johnson go and got my ass in a crack.
283
00:13:17,096 --> 00:13:20,066
No, I... I'm pretty
fond of puffed rice.
284
00:13:20,132 --> 00:13:23,042
Um, listen, Jerry.
285
00:13:23,102 --> 00:13:25,082
I need to talk business
regarding LaTrelle Shabazz.
286
00:13:25,104 --> 00:13:27,714
Hey, that poor
fella's got the legs
287
00:13:27,773 --> 00:13:29,513
of a three-month-old calf.
288
00:13:29,575 --> 00:13:30,835
Wobbly as hell.
289
00:13:30,909 --> 00:13:33,279
Aw, come on, Jerry,
he still hits good.
290
00:13:33,345 --> 00:13:35,775
The only thing he's hit
by are paternity suits.
291
00:13:35,848 --> 00:13:37,518
He's given you five good years.
292
00:13:37,583 --> 00:13:40,553
Made all pro three years, led the
league in interceptions one year.
293
00:13:40,619 --> 00:13:43,759
Arliss, ancient history. The
only thing he's been intercepting
294
00:13:43,822 --> 00:13:45,122
are Denny's waitresses.
295
00:13:45,190 --> 00:13:47,730
Jerry... the guy
needs an advance
296
00:13:47,793 --> 00:13:49,233
against next year's salary.
297
00:13:49,295 --> 00:13:52,025
Advance? Arliss,
we're gonna drop him
298
00:13:52,097 --> 00:13:53,497
at the end of the year.
299
00:13:55,501 --> 00:13:56,871
Drop him?
300
00:13:56,935 --> 00:13:58,795
You... you... you can't do that.
301
00:13:58,871 --> 00:14:00,271
Sure I can.
302
00:14:00,339 --> 00:14:03,379
No, no, no, no, he... he's
got a guaranteed contract.
303
00:14:03,442 --> 00:14:04,712
I know, I negotiated it.
304
00:14:04,777 --> 00:14:06,407
And a heck of a negotiation.
305
00:14:06,478 --> 00:14:09,648
Signing bonuses,
incentive clauses,
306
00:14:09,715 --> 00:14:10,845
whale of a deal.
307
00:14:10,916 --> 00:14:12,916
But we're gonna exercise
that buy-out option
308
00:14:12,985 --> 00:14:15,685
when we pay him 10 percent,
and kiss his ass goodbye,
309
00:14:15,754 --> 00:14:18,964
if I can find a place on there
that doesn't have a tattoo.
310
00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:21,434
Jerry, you can't kick a
man when he's down.
311
00:14:21,493 --> 00:14:24,903
Sure you can. How do
you think I bought this team?
312
00:14:32,705 --> 00:14:33,945
Shaq, so what
we're talking about
313
00:14:33,972 --> 00:14:36,782
is a two-hour prime-time
special during sweeps.
314
00:14:36,842 --> 00:14:39,352
"Shaq's World of Sports",
I kinda like that title.
315
00:14:39,411 --> 00:14:40,611
I liked it, too.
316
00:14:40,679 --> 00:14:42,289
And we'll have you at the
Olympics, at the Masters...
317
00:14:42,314 --> 00:14:44,524
-Baseball?
-(laughs) Tell you what...
318
00:14:44,583 --> 00:14:45,993
- if I go to spring training...
- Hmm?
319
00:14:46,018 --> 00:14:47,388
I won't be hittin' no 202.
320
00:14:47,453 --> 00:14:49,593
(all laughing)
321
00:14:49,655 --> 00:14:50,865
Come on, I'll show
you those figures.
322
00:14:50,889 --> 00:14:52,389
All right. Shaq,
I'll be right back.
323
00:14:55,527 --> 00:14:57,997
Shaquille O'Neal.
How the hell are you?
324
00:14:58,063 --> 00:14:59,503
Pretty good, how are you doin'?
325
00:14:59,565 --> 00:15:01,265
So, uh, gettin' ready
for the playoffs?
326
00:15:01,333 --> 00:15:03,703
Yeah, but if this bone
in my thumb don't heal,
327
00:15:03,769 --> 00:15:04,839
I might not play at all.
328
00:15:06,605 --> 00:15:08,435
Really?
329
00:15:08,507 --> 00:15:11,537
Whoo... your
thumb's not healing?
330
00:15:11,610 --> 00:15:13,550
I might not even make
it through the first round.
331
00:15:13,612 --> 00:15:16,552
Boy... that would
be awful, wouldn't it?
332
00:15:16,615 --> 00:15:19,245
Rita, do you have any lithium?
I'm not havin' a good day.
333
00:15:19,318 --> 00:15:21,048
Uh, see you around, Shaq.
334
00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:23,920
Hey hey hey! Shaquille,
man, my main man!
335
00:15:23,989 --> 00:15:25,759
How's the king of the
broken backboards?
336
00:15:25,824 --> 00:15:27,434
Not too bad, not too bad.
337
00:15:27,493 --> 00:15:30,763
Uh, excuse me, but, uh, this
gentleman has been waiting for you.
338
00:15:31,730 --> 00:15:32,730
So...?
339
00:15:33,766 --> 00:15:35,426
I'm Roberto St. Jacques.
340
00:15:35,501 --> 00:15:37,441
Ye-es?
341
00:15:37,503 --> 00:15:38,903
Sebastian's fiancé?
342
00:15:40,973 --> 00:15:43,183
Oh, yes! Yes! Of course!
343
00:15:43,242 --> 00:15:45,442
Uh, Shaq, just, uh, hang
here, give me a minute, will ya?
344
00:15:48,714 --> 00:15:50,584
- Uh, drink?
- No.
345
00:15:50,649 --> 00:15:51,789
- Something to drink sure?
- No, no.
346
00:15:51,817 --> 00:15:53,287
Beer? Wine? Maybe a pastis?
347
00:15:53,352 --> 00:15:54,892
Nothing? Please
sit. Sit right here.
348
00:15:54,953 --> 00:15:56,563
Please.
349
00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:58,392
Ah, great.
350
00:15:58,457 --> 00:16:00,827
- Mr. St. Jacques.
- Robo.
351
00:16:00,893 --> 00:16:03,963
Robo. Let me just say
how nice it is to meet you.
352
00:16:04,029 --> 00:16:05,729
Sebastian speaks
so highly of you.
353
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:09,568
Look. And wait until you
see the Mikimoto pearls.
354
00:16:10,903 --> 00:16:13,513
Yes, now... what we've got here
355
00:16:13,572 --> 00:16:15,772
is a very, very
delicate situation.
356
00:16:15,841 --> 00:16:18,241
Now the two of you are
in love, and personally...
357
00:16:18,310 --> 00:16:20,280
I think that's great.
358
00:16:20,345 --> 00:16:22,545
But we've got to
consider the response
359
00:16:22,614 --> 00:16:24,154
of a vast American public.
360
00:16:24,216 --> 00:16:26,076
I couldn't agree more.
361
00:16:26,151 --> 00:16:28,651
So... keeping that in mind,
362
00:16:28,720 --> 00:16:32,930
I'd like you to reconsider
the timing of the wedding.
363
00:16:32,991 --> 00:16:36,061
I mean, after all, with
Sebastian's crazy schedule,
364
00:16:36,128 --> 00:16:37,898
I could think of, like,
a thousand reasons
365
00:16:37,963 --> 00:16:40,133
why we should probably
postpone the wedding.
366
00:16:40,199 --> 00:16:41,529
A thousand?
367
00:16:41,600 --> 00:16:43,340
Oh, I could think of a
lot more than a thousand.
368
00:16:43,368 --> 00:16:44,468
(laughs) Exactly!
369
00:16:44,536 --> 00:16:46,106
I... I... I probably
could think of 10,000.
370
00:16:46,138 --> 00:16:48,538
Oh, I could probably think
of a lot more than 10,000!
371
00:16:49,942 --> 00:16:51,712
A lot more than 10,000?
372
00:16:51,777 --> 00:16:54,707
Oh, I could probably
think of, like, 200,000.
373
00:16:54,780 --> 00:16:57,420
Two... hundred thousand?
374
00:16:57,483 --> 00:16:59,063
I... I'm... I'm... I'm...
I'm... I'm not sure
375
00:16:59,084 --> 00:17:00,954
that I un... understand
you completely.
376
00:17:01,019 --> 00:17:04,389
I want $200,000 to
shut up and go away.
377
00:17:04,456 --> 00:17:05,916
How much?
378
00:17:05,991 --> 00:17:08,231
Personally, I think it's a
bit too low, but why haggle?
379
00:17:08,293 --> 00:17:10,403
Wait, wait, wait...
Mr. St. Jacques...
380
00:17:10,462 --> 00:17:12,632
(out of breath) I'm shocked.
381
00:17:12,698 --> 00:17:16,638
In fact, I am very tempted
to pick up this phone,
382
00:17:16,702 --> 00:17:19,672
and to call Sebastian and
tell him what you just proposed!
383
00:17:19,738 --> 00:17:21,738
No. You're wrong.
384
00:17:21,807 --> 00:17:24,077
Sebastian just proposed to me.
385
00:17:24,142 --> 00:17:26,152
If you say anything, I'll
tell him my side of the story,
386
00:17:26,178 --> 00:17:27,748
which is you tried
to buy me out!
387
00:17:28,981 --> 00:17:31,421
The boy's in love.
388
00:17:31,483 --> 00:17:32,953
Who do you think
he's gonna believe?
389
00:17:33,018 --> 00:17:34,018
Besides, like you said,
390
00:17:34,052 --> 00:17:35,752
this is a very
delicate situation.
391
00:17:35,821 --> 00:17:37,961
Nobody wants to see
themselves on "Hard Copy".
392
00:17:38,690 --> 00:17:40,430
This is disgusting.
393
00:17:40,492 --> 00:17:43,802
Disgusting? You don't
know what disgusting is.
394
00:17:43,862 --> 00:17:46,602
I've been in this ice
show circuit for 13 years.
395
00:17:46,665 --> 00:17:48,825
I started out as
a skating shrub!
396
00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:51,501
And then I was one
of the Three Little Pigs.
397
00:17:51,570 --> 00:17:53,940
One of the three
little fucking piggies!
398
00:17:54,006 --> 00:17:55,766
And when I finally
became a Smurf,
399
00:17:55,841 --> 00:17:57,011
that was a step up!
400
00:17:57,075 --> 00:17:59,875
Look... look, I appreciate
your discomfort,
401
00:17:59,945 --> 00:18:01,945
but you did make
the career choice.
402
00:18:02,014 --> 00:18:04,754
In addition, I want to play
King Arthur in your next tour,
403
00:18:04,816 --> 00:18:07,016
and I demand casting
approval over the roundtable.
404
00:18:07,085 --> 00:18:09,145
You know, there's
a word for this.
405
00:18:09,221 --> 00:18:10,521
Yes, I know.
406
00:18:11,623 --> 00:18:13,133
Leverage.
407
00:18:13,191 --> 00:18:14,431
Leverage, honey.
408
00:18:15,160 --> 00:18:16,330
Leverage.
409
00:18:18,730 --> 00:18:20,530
♪ Now it's over ♪
410
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:25,100
♪ Suddenly over ♪
411
00:18:25,170 --> 00:18:28,270
Arliss: The hardest
part of my job
412
00:18:28,340 --> 00:18:30,410
is telling a client bad news.
413
00:18:31,276 --> 00:18:34,906
Their pain is my pain.
414
00:18:34,980 --> 00:18:37,520
But no matter how
the client may react,
415
00:18:37,583 --> 00:18:41,153
I try to be straightforward,
honest, and sincere.
416
00:18:41,219 --> 00:18:42,299
♪ I'm the best at the sack ♪
417
00:18:42,321 --> 00:18:43,961
♪ The best in the sack, baby ♪
418
00:18:44,022 --> 00:18:46,592
♪ I'm one smooth
defensive back, dig it ♪
419
00:18:46,658 --> 00:18:48,988
Women: ♪ Dee dee
dee dee Defensive back ♪
420
00:18:49,061 --> 00:18:51,161
♪ Dee dee dee dee
Defensive back ♪
421
00:18:51,229 --> 00:18:53,269
Arliss, what's up, man?
422
00:18:53,332 --> 00:18:54,902
- Don't stop.
- Aw, fuck that, man.
423
00:18:54,967 --> 00:18:56,607
Look at you, standing'
out here lookin' like
424
00:18:56,635 --> 00:18:58,195
a stepchild and shit, man.
425
00:18:58,270 --> 00:18:59,500
So, what do you think?
426
00:18:59,571 --> 00:19:02,611
Oh, solid, man. Look, uh,
can we, uh, talk privately?
427
00:19:02,674 --> 00:19:05,384
Aw, shit, yeah, man. Um,
ladies, ladies, check it out, uh,
428
00:19:05,444 --> 00:19:06,954
why don't y'all
go in the kitchen
429
00:19:07,012 --> 00:19:08,552
and get some
lemonades or some shit?
430
00:19:08,614 --> 00:19:09,784
Okay, Daddy.
431
00:19:09,848 --> 00:19:10,848
Yeah.
432
00:19:12,351 --> 00:19:13,151
Bye, baby.
433
00:19:13,218 --> 00:19:15,318
- Yeah.
- Pleasure to meet you.
434
00:19:15,887 --> 00:19:17,117
Nice girls.
435
00:19:17,189 --> 00:19:20,089
Oh... yeah, shit, come
on in, man, what's up?
436
00:19:20,158 --> 00:19:21,088
What you got for me, baby?
437
00:19:21,159 --> 00:19:22,759
Oh, man. You shoulda seen me.
438
00:19:23,595 --> 00:19:25,055
You shoulda seen me.
439
00:19:26,164 --> 00:19:28,134
I went to the wall for you.
440
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:31,040
I went toe-to-toe
with Jerry Jones.
441
00:19:31,103 --> 00:19:32,603
And?
442
00:19:32,671 --> 00:19:34,611
They're not gonna
pick up your contract.
443
00:19:36,108 --> 00:19:38,778
Aw, fuck, Arliss, man, fuck
that, man, that's bullshit!
444
00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:41,054
Arliss, you fuckin'
promised me, man!
445
00:19:41,113 --> 00:19:44,353
What am I gonna do now, man... I've
done everything for that fuckin' team!
446
00:19:44,416 --> 00:19:45,976
Of course you have!
447
00:19:46,051 --> 00:19:49,021
Well, actually, you haven't
done that much for them this year.
448
00:19:49,087 --> 00:19:52,957
Arliss: Sometimes a negative
can be turned into a positive.
449
00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:58,155
Arliss always says, when one
door closes, another one opens.
450
00:19:58,230 --> 00:20:00,200
Ugh, look at this. Look at this.
451
00:20:00,265 --> 00:20:02,265
Look at this! Every paper
452
00:20:02,334 --> 00:20:04,144
prints the damn betting line!
453
00:20:04,202 --> 00:20:06,472
You know, all anybody talks
about is the point spread.
454
00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:10,608
Every local TV show prognosticator,
every two-bit local columnist.
455
00:20:10,676 --> 00:20:12,446
I mean, even the average
Joe man on the street,
456
00:20:12,477 --> 00:20:14,977
all they talk about is the damn
point spread, and you know what?
457
00:20:15,047 --> 00:20:17,777
It sucks!
458
00:20:17,849 --> 00:20:19,949
What the fuck are you
babblin' about, man?
459
00:20:20,018 --> 00:20:22,888
I'll tell you what
I'm babblin' about.
460
00:20:24,022 --> 00:20:25,402
Take, for instance,
this week's game.
461
00:20:25,424 --> 00:20:27,834
I think your team's
favored by 10 points.
462
00:20:27,893 --> 00:20:31,563
Now let's just say,
hypothetically speaking,
463
00:20:31,630 --> 00:20:33,700
that your team is ahead
by more than 10 points,
464
00:20:33,765 --> 00:20:35,135
and the last play
happens to be a pass
465
00:20:35,167 --> 00:20:36,497
in the direction of a certain
466
00:20:36,568 --> 00:20:38,598
de-de-defensive back.
467
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:44,810
He goes up to break up the
play, but unfortunately, he trips...
468
00:20:44,876 --> 00:20:47,446
Goddamn Astroturf!
469
00:20:47,512 --> 00:20:50,182
And as he valiantly
falls to the ground,
470
00:20:52,117 --> 00:20:55,317
the receiver catches a
meaningless touchdown pass.
471
00:20:56,655 --> 00:20:59,755
Now, unfortunate as that may be,
472
00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:03,729
his team still wins the game.
473
00:21:03,795 --> 00:21:07,825
But they just do it by
less than 10 points.
474
00:21:09,534 --> 00:21:11,604
Less than 10 points, huh?
475
00:21:11,670 --> 00:21:14,940
Now, there are some people
who would be very happy
476
00:21:15,006 --> 00:21:17,076
about a defensive back's mishap.
477
00:21:17,142 --> 00:21:19,682
Yeah, man, and... and
a win is still a win, right?
478
00:21:19,745 --> 00:21:21,505
Exactly.
479
00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:24,420
Because after that defensive
back's career is over,
480
00:21:24,483 --> 00:21:26,953
and it might be after this game,
481
00:21:27,018 --> 00:21:28,518
he's gonna have to look himself
482
00:21:28,587 --> 00:21:30,957
in the mirror and say...
483
00:21:31,022 --> 00:21:35,062
"Did I get everything I
could've out of this game?"
484
00:21:39,197 --> 00:21:40,697
How much?
485
00:21:40,766 --> 00:21:42,866
Five hundred thousand dollars.
486
00:21:42,934 --> 00:21:44,874
Five hundred thousand?
487
00:21:44,936 --> 00:21:46,166
Sh-sh-sh-sh...
488
00:21:46,238 --> 00:21:49,608
Boss... I mean,
that is heavy money.
489
00:21:49,674 --> 00:21:51,744
These guys are gonna
know somethin' isn't kosher.
490
00:21:51,810 --> 00:21:54,410
Why? You've lost that
much over the years,
491
00:21:54,479 --> 00:21:55,789
and they've always
been supportive.
492
00:21:55,814 --> 00:21:57,724
Oh, yes, but not on one game!
493
00:21:57,783 --> 00:22:00,453
I mean, you don't wanna
fool around with these guys.
494
00:22:00,519 --> 00:22:02,989
I won't. You will.
495
00:22:03,989 --> 00:22:05,089
Me?
496
00:22:06,591 --> 00:22:08,231
Where am I gonna
get that kinda cash?
497
00:22:13,165 --> 00:22:16,895
Arliss: Will the
numbers ever add up?
498
00:22:16,968 --> 00:22:20,338
Anyway, I hope
you now understand
499
00:22:20,405 --> 00:22:24,305
why the evening of December 17th
500
00:22:24,376 --> 00:22:26,576
was so important to me.
501
00:22:26,645 --> 00:22:29,415
Something to all of us on the dais,
and really, to each and every one of you
502
00:22:29,447 --> 00:22:31,147
in this room.
503
00:22:31,216 --> 00:22:33,886
Arliss: That night my
focus was on one thing
504
00:22:33,952 --> 00:22:38,862
and one thing only: all the
good that this evening was doing
505
00:22:38,924 --> 00:22:40,734
for other people.
506
00:22:40,792 --> 00:22:46,402
Arliss was also the agent who talked
me into doing the Jockey underwear deal.
507
00:22:46,464 --> 00:22:48,984
But you know, Arliss, I think
really what it comes down to is that,
508
00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:51,640
you just like making
money off my balls.
509
00:22:51,703 --> 00:22:54,073
(laughter) Ohhh!
510
00:22:55,473 --> 00:22:56,553
Ann Meyers: And I
remember the first time...
511
00:22:56,575 --> 00:22:58,135
Arliss: As the
evening progressed,
512
00:22:58,210 --> 00:23:00,910
and basketball great Ann
Meyers took to the podium,
513
00:23:00,979 --> 00:23:05,819
I paid rapt attention, as my dear
friend tossed good natured barbs
514
00:23:05,884 --> 00:23:07,594
in my direction.
515
00:23:07,652 --> 00:23:11,062
I wanted an agent, and he
wanted a date for New Year's Eve.
516
00:23:11,122 --> 00:23:13,592
(laughter)
517
00:23:13,658 --> 00:23:16,528
Well, we've all had
a good time tonight,
518
00:23:16,595 --> 00:23:20,465
but enough of the hi-jinks, let's get
to the real reason why we're here.
519
00:23:20,532 --> 00:23:23,802
I'm talkin' about Arliss
Michaels the humanitarian.
520
00:23:23,869 --> 00:23:26,099
Arliss Michaels,
the civic leader.
521
00:23:26,171 --> 00:23:29,911
Arliss: When Bob started paying
tribute I thought, who am I, an agent,
522
00:23:29,975 --> 00:23:32,105
to receive such accolades?
523
00:23:32,177 --> 00:23:35,047
But I admit, I am
proud of my profession.
524
00:23:38,450 --> 00:23:40,050
Sebastian, this came for you.
525
00:23:40,118 --> 00:23:41,918
Thanks.
526
00:23:41,987 --> 00:23:45,317
Arliss: I believe I have
affected other people's lives.
527
00:23:45,390 --> 00:23:47,760
Robo's voice: Dear
Sebastian, Sorry, I had a chance
528
00:23:47,826 --> 00:23:50,756
to do "Camelot" in
Vancouver. I had to take it.
529
00:23:50,829 --> 00:23:52,729
Ciao! Robo.
530
00:23:55,367 --> 00:23:56,367
You're on.
531
00:23:57,469 --> 00:24:00,409
(opera music playing)
532
00:24:08,647 --> 00:24:11,477
Arliss: Being an agent is
a lot like being a parent.
533
00:24:11,549 --> 00:24:14,389
You've got to to do things
for other people's good.
534
00:24:14,452 --> 00:24:17,692
They may not like it at first,
but they'll thank you later.
535
00:24:18,456 --> 00:24:20,486
(screaming)
536
00:24:20,558 --> 00:24:22,928
(crash)
537
00:24:22,994 --> 00:24:26,934
Arliss: And that night, I
was grateful for everything
538
00:24:26,998 --> 00:24:28,898
that was happening to me.
539
00:24:31,136 --> 00:24:34,436
Announcer: Nine seconds
left. Ball on the six yard line.
540
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:37,340
Defense breaks the huddle.
541
00:24:37,409 --> 00:24:38,639
As do the Skins.
542
00:24:41,613 --> 00:24:44,753
This'll be the last play of the
game, the Skins are down by 12.
543
00:24:44,816 --> 00:24:47,346
So a score won't
affect the final outcome.
544
00:24:47,419 --> 00:24:49,049
Motion! Motion!
545
00:24:49,120 --> 00:24:50,630
Bob Costas: I'm talkin'
about Arliss Michaels
546
00:24:50,655 --> 00:24:54,425
the humanitarian. Arliss
Michaels the civic leader.
547
00:24:54,492 --> 00:24:57,102
Arliss Michaels the big brother.
548
00:24:57,162 --> 00:24:59,432
Announcer: Quarterback
barks signals, here's the snap!
549
00:25:05,971 --> 00:25:08,771
Ladies and gentlemen,
a man who epitomizes
550
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:11,580
what sports is really
all about today...
551
00:25:11,643 --> 00:25:14,113
Announcer: He's
looking into the end zone.
552
00:25:15,180 --> 00:25:17,880
Shabazz trips, he's down!
553
00:25:17,949 --> 00:25:20,289
Bob Costas: It is with
pride that I give you
554
00:25:20,352 --> 00:25:24,462
Arliss Michaels, truly
"A Man of Our Times."
555
00:25:24,522 --> 00:25:27,192
(applause)
556
00:25:27,258 --> 00:25:30,198
Announcer: Broller is wide open!
557
00:25:30,261 --> 00:25:34,131
He drops the ball! He drops
the ball on a sure touchdown!
558
00:25:34,199 --> 00:25:35,629
Oh, baby!
559
00:25:35,700 --> 00:25:39,340
♪ I only know I never
wanna let you go ♪
560
00:25:39,404 --> 00:25:42,814
♪ 'Cause you started
something, oh can't you see ♪
561
00:25:42,874 --> 00:25:46,344
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
562
00:25:46,411 --> 00:25:49,651
♪ It happens to be true ♪
563
00:25:49,714 --> 00:25:51,784
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
564
00:25:51,850 --> 00:25:55,220
Arliss: For me... it was
a million dollar moment.
565
00:25:55,286 --> 00:25:57,216
♪ It doesn't matter where
you go or what you do ♪
566
00:25:57,288 --> 00:26:00,488
♪ I wanna spend each
moment of the day with you ♪
567
00:26:00,558 --> 00:26:02,928
Arliss: My name
is Arliss Michaels.
568
00:26:02,994 --> 00:26:04,664
I represent athletes.
569
00:26:04,729 --> 00:26:06,699
These are my stories.
570
00:26:08,066 --> 00:26:11,536
♪ It's crazy but it's true ♪
571
00:26:11,603 --> 00:26:16,013
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
572
00:26:16,074 --> 00:26:22,954
♪ You stopped and smiled at
me, asked if I cared to dance ♪
573
00:26:23,014 --> 00:26:28,624
♪ I fell into your open arms
and I didn't stand a chance ♪
574
00:26:28,686 --> 00:26:29,986
♪ Now listen honey ♪
575
00:26:30,055 --> 00:26:33,425
♪ I just wanna be
beside you everywhere ♪
576
00:26:33,491 --> 00:26:37,001
♪ As long as we're
together, honey, I don't care ♪
577
00:26:37,062 --> 00:26:40,202
♪ 'Cause you started
something, oh can't you see ♪
578
00:26:40,265 --> 00:26:43,995
♪ That ever since we met
you had a hold on me ♪
579
00:26:44,069 --> 00:26:47,569
♪ No matter what you do ♪
580
00:26:47,639 --> 00:26:50,309
♪ I only wanna be with you ♪
581
00:26:51,643 --> 00:26:56,213
♪♪
582
00:26:56,263 --> 00:27:00,813
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