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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,233 --> 00:00:05,873 - AW, MAN, CASA'S GOING TO THE DANCE 2 00:00:05,867 --> 00:00:07,097 WITH BJ KUNTZ. 3 00:00:07,100 --> 00:00:08,700 - I THOUGHT HE LIKED HJ. 4 00:00:08,700 --> 00:00:11,770 - NOBODY WOULD CHOOSE HJ OVER BJ. 5 00:00:11,767 --> 00:00:13,027 - HOW DO YOU KEEP FINDING OUT ABOUT 6 00:00:13,033 --> 00:00:15,073 ALL THESE DATES TO THE PROM? 7 00:00:15,067 --> 00:00:17,727 - THAT SITE WADSKA SET UP-- HIGH SCHOOL MASTER DATER. 8 00:00:17,733 --> 00:00:21,133 HE GIVES SUPER-INSTANT UPDATES ON EVERYONE'S PROM STATUS. 9 00:00:21,133 --> 00:00:22,673 - TISSUES? WHAT DO THEY THINK? 10 00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:24,597 I'LL BE AT HOME CRYING ALL NIGHT? 11 00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:26,070 - UH...NO. 12 00:00:26,067 --> 00:00:27,297 - MMM. 13 00:00:27,300 --> 00:00:29,770 - I CAN'T BELIEVE JEENA'S STILL WITH TURK. 14 00:00:29,767 --> 00:00:32,497 LATELY I'VE BEEN HAVING THESE REOCCURRING FANTASIES 15 00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:35,930 WHERE I'M DANCING WITH HER. 16 00:00:35,933 --> 00:00:38,933 [mellow dance music] 17 00:00:38,933 --> 00:00:43,933 * * 18 00:00:43,933 --> 00:00:45,303 AND THE NEXT THING I KNOW, 19 00:00:45,300 --> 00:00:48,500 I'M COVERED IN BLOOD, CRYING INTO A PLATE OF RAVIOLI. 20 00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:50,100 - THAT'S TERRIBLE. - NO! 21 00:00:50,100 --> 00:00:52,970 IT WAS LOBSTER, WITH A NICE BUTTER-SAGE SAUCE. 22 00:00:52,967 --> 00:00:54,497 - PLUG YOUR LITTLE PLEASURE HOLES, PIGLETS! 23 00:00:54,500 --> 00:00:57,430 TODAY WE'RE GONNA HAVE A VERY SERIOUS TALK ABOUT ALCOHOL, 24 00:00:57,433 --> 00:00:58,703 AND HOW IT'S SUCH A GINORMOUS PROBLEM 25 00:00:58,700 --> 00:01:00,070 AT SCHOOL DANCES. 26 00:01:00,067 --> 00:01:01,327 IT CAN MAKE YOU HAVE SEX, 27 00:01:01,333 --> 00:01:03,433 WHICH COULD LEAD TO CONTRACTING A DEBILITATING DISEASE 28 00:01:03,433 --> 00:01:05,273 CALLED "BABIES." 29 00:01:05,267 --> 00:01:07,267 LITTLE DEE-DEE HERE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE. 30 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:09,827 - I'M FIXIN' TO NAME IT MALIBU. 31 00:01:09,833 --> 00:01:12,073 IT'S A RUM, IT'S A CAR, 32 00:01:12,067 --> 00:01:15,097 AND A CLASSY PLACE TO PARK YOUR RV. 33 00:01:15,100 --> 00:01:18,070 - TO ILLUSTRATE, WE'RE GONNA WATCH AND EDUCATIONAL VIDEO, 34 00:01:18,067 --> 00:01:19,597 RECENTLY CONVERTED TO 3-D. 35 00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:22,770 - CHILDBIRTH: FROM CONCEPTION TO DIVORCE. 36 00:01:22,767 --> 00:01:25,767 - [groaning] - PUSH. PUSH. 37 00:01:25,767 --> 00:01:27,527 [wet squishy sounds] [all gasp] 38 00:01:27,533 --> 00:01:28,633 - HOLY LORD. 39 00:01:28,633 --> 00:01:32,603 - WELCOME TO THIS WORLD, MONTGOMERY BRANDO. 40 00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:33,600 [baby coos] 41 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:36,070 [laughter] 42 00:01:36,067 --> 00:01:39,367 [upbeat rock music] 43 00:01:39,367 --> 00:01:43,697 * * 44 00:01:43,700 --> 00:01:45,770 - MOM, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME 45 00:01:45,767 --> 00:01:48,967 ABOUT THE CHILDBIRTH VIDEO? - YOU SAW THAT? 46 00:01:48,967 --> 00:01:50,867 - I'VE NEVER BEEN MORE EMBARRASSED. 47 00:01:50,867 --> 00:01:53,127 - WHAT ABOUT THE TIME WHEN YOU FARTED ON SANTA'S LAP? 48 00:01:53,133 --> 00:01:56,303 - I WAS 13! AND YOU KNOW WHAT EGGNOG DOES TO ME. 49 00:01:56,300 --> 00:01:58,070 DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT! 50 00:01:58,067 --> 00:02:00,227 - I WAS A POOR, SINGLE MOM BACK THEN. 51 00:02:00,233 --> 00:02:01,633 THINGS WERE HARD. 52 00:02:01,633 --> 00:02:03,233 [entry bells jingle] 53 00:02:06,100 --> 00:02:08,070 - MY ANGELS! MY [bleep] ANGELS! 54 00:02:08,067 --> 00:02:10,697 - THEN THE LOCAL COLLEGE OFFERED ME GOOD MONEY 55 00:02:10,700 --> 00:02:13,670 TO BE IN THAT VIDEO AND PAY FOR ALL OF MY HOSPITAL BILLS. 56 00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,597 I DID IT SO I COULD SURVIVE. 57 00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:17,470 SO WE COULD SURVIVE. 58 00:02:17,467 --> 00:02:21,067 - WOW, I HAD NO IDEA HOW HARD IT WAS FOR YOU. 59 00:02:21,067 --> 00:02:24,267 - BUT IT WAS ALL WORTH IT BECAUSE I GOT TO HAVE YOU. 60 00:02:24,267 --> 00:02:26,927 - MA, ARE THERE ANY OTHER EMBARRASSING VIDEOS 61 00:02:26,933 --> 00:02:28,273 I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT? 62 00:02:28,267 --> 00:02:29,867 - WELL, ONE, BUT YOU KNOW, 63 00:02:29,867 --> 00:02:32,297 IT WAS JUST USED TO PAY FOR YOUR SPEECH THERAPY. 64 00:02:32,300 --> 00:02:36,300 - * I'M A WIDDLE POOPER SHORT AND STOUT * 65 00:02:36,300 --> 00:02:39,900 * I EAT PASTHCETTI AND MEATBALLSTH COME OUT * 66 00:02:39,900 --> 00:02:41,530 [laughing] 67 00:02:41,533 --> 00:02:43,673 [air horn blares] 68 00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:45,697 - ALL HANDS ON DECK AS I REVEAL TO YOU 69 00:02:45,700 --> 00:02:48,130 THE THEME FOR THIS YEAR'S JUNIOR PROM. 70 00:02:48,133 --> 00:02:50,503 "JUST THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG." 71 00:02:50,500 --> 00:02:52,070 all: BOO! 72 00:02:52,067 --> 00:02:53,097 [rip] 73 00:02:53,100 --> 00:02:54,870 [all cheer] 74 00:02:54,867 --> 00:02:57,597 all: JUST THE TIP! JUST THE TIP... 75 00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:00,430 - OLIVER. DICK NOODLE. 76 00:03:00,433 --> 00:03:02,403 - YOU KNOW IT'S NUDELL! 77 00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,500 - NUDELL. 78 00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:07,200 - SO, WADSKA, ARE YOU GOING TO THE DANCE? 79 00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:08,870 WOULDN'T MISS IT! 80 00:03:08,867 --> 00:03:10,767 THE SECOND LIFE SWEETHEARTS' JAMBOREE 81 00:03:10,767 --> 00:03:13,167 IS GONNA BE THE ONLINE EVENT OF THE SEASON! 82 00:03:13,167 --> 00:03:16,297 I EVEN PURCHASED A NEW GLADIATOR COMBAT TUXEDO, 83 00:03:16,300 --> 00:03:18,170 COMPLETE WITH ARMORED CUMMERBUND 84 00:03:18,167 --> 00:03:19,427 AND CANE-SWORD. 85 00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:21,333 - ACTUALLY, WE'RE GOING TO THE REAL DANCE 86 00:03:21,333 --> 00:03:22,873 WITH REAL DATES. 87 00:03:22,867 --> 00:03:24,597 - WE'RE NOT LOSERS. 88 00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:28,070 [laughter] 89 00:03:28,067 --> 00:03:30,197 - I WAS J.K.in' ALL OVER YOUR FACES! 90 00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:32,500 OF COURSE I HAVE A REAL DATE. 91 00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:35,170 - IS SHE A MAIL-ORDER BRIDE? 92 00:03:35,167 --> 00:03:38,267 - [gasps] HOW DARE YOU! 93 00:03:38,267 --> 00:03:41,567 DAMN, NOW I NEED A PLAN "B." 94 00:03:41,567 --> 00:03:43,427 - I BEEN THINKING ABOUT OUR SPECIAL NIGHT, 95 00:03:43,433 --> 00:03:47,173 AND I GOT US A HOTEL ROOM AT THE ONE & DONE MOTOR LODGE. 96 00:03:47,167 --> 00:03:49,697 - OH, SWEET! WE'LL HAVE A KICKASS AFTER PARTY THERE. 97 00:03:49,700 --> 00:03:51,800 - OH, NO CAN DO, BABE. 98 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:54,170 GOT A BIT OF A SCHEDULING CONFLICT. 99 00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:55,897 I WENT IN WITH CHESTER AND CASA. 100 00:03:55,900 --> 00:03:57,800 YOU AND I HAVE THE ROOM FROM 7:00 TO 9:00, 101 00:03:57,800 --> 00:03:59,800 AND THEN AGAIN FROM 2:00 TO 4:00. 102 00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:03,270 - TURK, ALL I WANTED WAS ONE ROMANTIC NIGHT. 103 00:04:03,267 --> 00:04:05,697 AND INSTEAD, YOU "SCHEDULE ME" FOR SEX 104 00:04:05,700 --> 00:04:07,430 IN A HOTEL ROOM, LIKE A PROSTITUTE. 105 00:04:07,433 --> 00:04:08,803 - AW, BABE, THAT'S NOT TRUE. 106 00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:10,170 YOU'RE NOT GETTING PAID FOR THIS. 107 00:04:10,167 --> 00:04:12,597 YOU'RE DOING IT PRO-BONER. [laughs] 108 00:04:15,867 --> 00:04:18,327 - MY TAPIOCA! MY [bleep] TAPIOCA! 109 00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:21,133 - [crying] 110 00:04:21,133 --> 00:04:24,703 - I GOTTA GO TALK TO HER. 111 00:04:24,700 --> 00:04:25,970 - [crying] 112 00:04:25,967 --> 00:04:28,267 - DEE-DEE, ARE-- ARE YOU OKAY? 113 00:04:28,267 --> 00:04:29,627 - WELL, LET'S SEE. 114 00:04:29,633 --> 00:04:32,533 I'M A BLOATED, LEAKING, STRETCH-MARKED PIG. 115 00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:35,373 MY BABY-DADDY DUMPED ME, NO ONE'S TAKING ME TO PROM, 116 00:04:35,367 --> 00:04:39,667 AND MY NIPPERS...LOOK...LIKE... BURNT...TATER TOTS! 117 00:04:39,667 --> 00:04:42,427 I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH. 118 00:04:42,433 --> 00:04:44,333 - REALLY? BECAUSE YOU'RE FAT? 119 00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:47,603 - NO. MY MOM WENT THROUGH IT ALONE TOO. 120 00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:50,700 - WELL, THANKS FOR TALKING TO ME, MONDO, 121 00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:53,070 BUT YOU CAN GO BACK TO YOUR FUN HIGH SCHOOL EXPERIENCE 122 00:04:53,067 --> 00:04:54,527 WHILE I CONTEMPLATE MY RUINED LIFE 123 00:04:54,533 --> 00:04:57,403 AND EAT THIS TUREEN OF PICKLES. 124 00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,933 - HEY, DEE-DEE, YOU KNOW, 125 00:05:01,933 --> 00:05:04,773 I--I DON'T HAVE ANYONE TO GO TO THE PROM WITH. 126 00:05:04,767 --> 00:05:06,167 - [gasps] REALLY? 127 00:05:06,167 --> 00:05:08,127 YOU'D WANNA GO WITH ME? 128 00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:10,073 OH, THANKS, MONDO. 129 00:05:10,067 --> 00:05:11,927 I'D LOVE TO BE YOUR DATE. 130 00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:16,533 - DUDE, BREAKING NEWS! 131 00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,203 TURK AND JEENA JUST BROKE UP. 132 00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:20,170 YOU CAN TOTALLY GET IN THERE. 133 00:05:20,167 --> 00:05:21,767 - BA-EHHHHHH! 134 00:05:24,900 --> 00:05:28,530 - UHH! HOW WILL I EVER FIND A BEAUTIFUL GIRL 135 00:05:28,533 --> 00:05:30,503 ON A CALIFORNIA BEACH? 136 00:05:30,500 --> 00:05:33,370 OH, SHE LOOKS TOO MUCH LIKE A BOY. 137 00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:35,667 EW, SHE LOOKS TOO MUCH LIKE A GIRL! 138 00:05:35,667 --> 00:05:37,497 THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE! OOH! 139 00:05:39,267 --> 00:05:40,927 GREAT KELSO! 140 00:05:40,933 --> 00:05:45,303 IT'S TEN-TIME TEEN CHOICE AWARD NOMINEE MILA KUNIS! 141 00:05:45,300 --> 00:05:47,900 - IT'S HER. 142 00:05:47,900 --> 00:05:50,200 all: MILA! MILA! MILA! MILA! MILA! 143 00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,070 - REALLY? COME ON! 144 00:05:54,067 --> 00:05:55,827 I KNOW YOU GUYS NEED TO MAKE A LIVING, 145 00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:59,173 BUT I'M A HUMAN BEING, AND I'M ENTITLED TO SOME PRIVACY. 146 00:05:59,167 --> 00:06:00,597 - OH, SORRY, MISS KUNIS. 147 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:03,770 YOUR WORDS HAVE TOUCHED OUR HEARTS. 148 00:06:03,767 --> 00:06:06,527 NOW, COULD YOU SAY THEM AGAIN WITH THIS BAG OF DRUGS 149 00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,873 AND A SLIPPED NIPPLE? 150 00:06:08,867 --> 00:06:09,927 - HYAH! 151 00:06:09,933 --> 00:06:11,203 [shutters snapping] 152 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:12,600 - THIS IS MY CHANCE. 153 00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:15,500 QUICK, MILA, GET YOUR KUNIS OVER HERE! 154 00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:16,870 [bongos thumping] 155 00:06:16,867 --> 00:06:20,097 [camera shutters click] [paparazzi wheezing] 156 00:06:22,667 --> 00:06:25,227 - [exhales] THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HELPING ME. 157 00:06:25,233 --> 00:06:27,433 IS THERE ANYTHING I COULD DO FOR YOU? 158 00:06:27,433 --> 00:06:30,203 EXCEPT TALK ABOUT MY LESBIAN SCENE WITH NATALIE PORTMAN. 159 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:32,300 - HA! WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE, 160 00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:34,570 SOME KIND OF SEX-CRAZED FANBOY? 161 00:06:34,567 --> 00:06:36,797 [laughs, gasps] 162 00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,170 BUT NOW THAT YOU MENTION IT, 163 00:06:38,167 --> 00:06:40,967 YOU CAN ACCOMPANY ME TO MY HIGH SCHOOL DANCE THIS EVENING. 164 00:06:40,967 --> 00:06:43,327 - [chuckles] I WAS THINKING MORE LIKE 165 00:06:43,333 --> 00:06:44,703 AN AUTOGRAPH OR SOMETHING. 166 00:06:44,700 --> 00:06:47,230 - NO, I'M AFRAID THAT WON'T DO. 167 00:06:47,233 --> 00:06:49,373 I'M A DESPERATE MAN. 168 00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:52,427 I NEED TO RUB YOU IN DICK NOODLE'S FACE! 169 00:06:52,433 --> 00:06:55,573 UH, OKAY. I'M GONNA GO NOW. 170 00:06:55,567 --> 00:06:56,597 DON'T FOLLOW ME. 171 00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:58,470 - WAIT, KUNIS, PLEASE. - LET GO! 172 00:06:58,467 --> 00:07:00,097 - AAA-- - OH! 173 00:07:00,100 --> 00:07:01,700 MM... 174 00:07:01,700 --> 00:07:04,230 - MILA? MILA? 175 00:07:04,233 --> 00:07:05,633 - WHAT'S HAPPENING? 176 00:07:05,633 --> 00:07:07,633 I'M SO CONFUSED. 177 00:07:07,633 --> 00:07:09,833 I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO I AM. 178 00:07:09,833 --> 00:07:12,773 - OH. WELL, I CAN HELP YOU WITH THAT. 179 00:07:12,767 --> 00:07:15,727 YOU'RE MILA, MY DEVOTED AND HORNY GIRLFRIEND, 180 00:07:15,733 --> 00:07:17,833 AND WE'VE GOT A HIGH SCHOOL DANCE TO GET TO! 181 00:07:17,833 --> 00:07:20,673 [flatulence] [laughter] 182 00:07:20,667 --> 00:07:22,197 - [gasps] I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY 183 00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:24,470 EVER SINCE JEENA STOLE TURK FROM ME. 184 00:07:24,467 --> 00:07:26,567 FEEL THIS, BITCHES. REVENGE BUMPS. 185 00:07:26,567 --> 00:07:28,827 OOH, IF I HADN'T LASERED ALL THE HAIR OFF MY BODY, 186 00:07:28,833 --> 00:07:30,503 IT'D BE STANDING ON END. 187 00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:34,370 HEY, TURK, HEARD YOU AND JEENA TOTALLY BROKE UP. 188 00:07:34,367 --> 00:07:37,067 YEAH. I GOTTA BE FREE, LIKE A BIRD, 189 00:07:37,067 --> 00:07:38,427 OR A EUROPEAN TITTY. 190 00:07:38,433 --> 00:07:41,873 - WELL, I DON'T HAVE A DATE TO THE DANCE YET, 191 00:07:41,867 --> 00:07:43,527 SO IF YOU WANT, YOU CAN ASK ME, 192 00:07:43,533 --> 00:07:45,403 AND I PROMISE NOT TO LAUGH IN YOUR FACE. 193 00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:47,570 - THAT'S AN INTERESTING PROPOSITION. 194 00:07:47,567 --> 00:07:50,467 GIVE ME A MOMENT TO CONFER WITH MY ASSOCIATES. 195 00:07:50,467 --> 00:07:53,227 - ON THE DOWN SIDE, SHE'S A BITCHY SLUT. 196 00:07:53,233 --> 00:07:54,473 - GOOD POINT. 197 00:07:54,467 --> 00:07:56,397 - ON THE UP SIDE, SHE'S A SLUTTY BITCH. 198 00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:57,730 - EXCELLENT COUNTERPOINT. 199 00:07:57,733 --> 00:07:59,233 IT APPEARS WE'RE A WELL-HUNG JURY. 200 00:07:59,233 --> 00:08:00,603 [laughs] 201 00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:03,070 AND CLOSING ARGUMENTS REALLY WOULD PISS JEENA OFF. 202 00:08:03,067 --> 00:08:05,267 - [gulps] 203 00:08:05,267 --> 00:08:07,327 POP A SQUAT, SQUIRTER. HERE'S AN EXTRA SEAT. 204 00:08:07,333 --> 00:08:08,673 - THANKS. 205 00:08:08,667 --> 00:08:10,897 - SO THERE'S BEEN A LOT OF SCUTTLEBUTTS ON THE INTERNET 206 00:08:10,900 --> 00:08:12,400 ABOUT YOU NOT GOING TO THE DANCE. 207 00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:14,900 I DON'T MEAN TO JUDGE, BUT YOU'RE A STUPID IDIOT. 208 00:08:14,900 --> 00:08:16,170 YOU SHOULDN'T MISS YOUR PROM. 209 00:08:16,167 --> 00:08:18,967 I MISSED MINE, AND I REGRET IT TO THIS DAY. 210 00:08:18,967 --> 00:08:20,827 - REALLY? - VERY REALLY. 211 00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:24,173 I WAS EXACTLY LIKE YOU IN EVERY WAY. 212 00:08:24,167 --> 00:08:27,427 HIS NAME WAS DUNCAN. HE WAS LIKE A PRINCE. 213 00:08:27,433 --> 00:08:29,173 - OOH, THAT SOUNDS NICE. 214 00:08:29,167 --> 00:08:31,967 - I MEAN PRINCE THE MUSICIAN, BUT SMALLER. 215 00:08:31,967 --> 00:08:33,367 WE MET THE DAY OF THE DANCE 216 00:08:33,367 --> 00:08:36,197 AT THE FRIED PASTRY SHOP I WORKED AT. 217 00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,070 HE ASKED ME TO PROM AND SAID 218 00:08:38,067 --> 00:08:39,227 HE'D PICK ME UP AT 8:00 THAT NIGHT. 219 00:08:39,233 --> 00:08:41,273 BUT I WAITED AND I WAITED, 220 00:08:41,267 --> 00:08:45,227 AND HE NEVER EVER SHOWED UP. 221 00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:47,273 I COULDN'T GET I TOUCH WITH HIM BECAUSE BACK THEN 222 00:08:47,267 --> 00:08:49,567 THERE WASN'T EMAIL OR CELL PHONES OR TEXTING. 223 00:08:49,567 --> 00:08:50,967 - WOW, THINGS HAVE REALLY CHANGED. 224 00:08:50,967 --> 00:08:53,097 OR FACEBOOK OR TWITTER OR GCHAT. 225 00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:54,130 - OH, WELL, THAT'S A LOT OF-- 226 00:08:54,133 --> 00:08:56,173 - OR SKYPE OR INSTANT MESSENGER OR BUZZ 227 00:08:56,167 --> 00:08:58,467 OR MISSED CONNECTIONS. 228 00:08:58,467 --> 00:09:00,867 WHAT, AM I HAVING A CONVERSATION WITH A [bleep] WALL? 229 00:09:00,867 --> 00:09:02,767 - OH, SORRY. I WAS-- - THE REST OF THE SCHOOL YEAR 230 00:09:02,767 --> 00:09:04,697 I WAS STUCK LISTENING TO MY STUPID CLASSMATES 231 00:09:04,700 --> 00:09:06,600 TALK ABOUT ALL THE STUPID FUN THEY HAD. 232 00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:08,530 - HUH. YOU KNOW WHAT? 233 00:09:08,533 --> 00:09:10,433 I THINK I'M GONNA TAKE YOUR ADVICE. 234 00:09:10,433 --> 00:09:11,873 THANKS. 235 00:09:11,867 --> 00:09:15,067 - SEÑOR CUERVO, MEET MR. DANIELS. 236 00:09:15,067 --> 00:09:19,697 DON'T WORRY, THERE'S ROOM IN HERE FOR BOTH Y'ALL. 237 00:09:19,700 --> 00:09:21,600 [beep] 238 00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:24,470 [crying out] 239 00:09:24,467 --> 00:09:26,927 - I HAVE NO BUSINESS HANGING OUT WITH A PREGNANT GIRL. 240 00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:30,433 I JUST KILLED 180 BABIES IN THE LAST TEN MINUTES. 241 00:09:30,433 --> 00:09:33,273 I'M A BABY KILLER, THAT'S WHAT I AM. 242 00:09:33,267 --> 00:09:34,467 [giddy shudder] 243 00:09:34,467 --> 00:09:37,797 HEY, JEENA. I HEARD ABOUT YOU AND TURK. 244 00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:39,230 - YEAH, IT'S WHATEVER. 245 00:09:39,233 --> 00:09:41,633 I SAW YOU'RE GOING WITH DEE-DEE. 246 00:09:41,633 --> 00:09:43,603 - YEAH, IT SUCKS. I MEAN, IT DOESN'T SUCK, 247 00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:45,470 IT'S JUST THAT I'M TAKING A PREGNANT GIRL TO THE PROM, 248 00:09:45,467 --> 00:09:47,397 AND IT WOULD BE COOLER IF IT WAS YOU. 249 00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:48,930 NOT THAT I THINK IT'D BE COOL IF YOU WERE PREGNANT. 250 00:09:48,933 --> 00:09:50,233 I MEAN, I'D LOVE IT IF YOU WERE PREGNANT, 251 00:09:50,233 --> 00:09:52,273 BUT IN THE FUTURE, AND MAYBE BY ME. 252 00:09:52,267 --> 00:09:54,067 BUT THAT'S A CONVERSATION WE'LL HAVE ONE DAY. 253 00:09:54,067 --> 00:09:55,667 YOU KNOW, WHEN I'M FINANCIALLY STABLE. 254 00:09:55,667 --> 00:09:57,767 WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS I REALLY WISH YOU WERE GOING 255 00:09:57,767 --> 00:10:00,097 'CAUSE I'M GONNA BE HEAT ON FEET ON THE DANCE FLOOR. 256 00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,870 [humming dance beat] - [laughs] 257 00:10:01,867 --> 00:10:03,627 WELL, I WAS GONNA GO ANYWAY, 258 00:10:03,633 --> 00:10:05,403 BUT NOW I'M GONNA HAVE TO BREAK OUT 259 00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:06,670 THE DOUBLE-DREAM HANDS. 260 00:10:06,667 --> 00:10:08,497 - YOU'RE GOING? - YEAH. 261 00:10:08,500 --> 00:10:10,530 BUT I GUESS I HAVE TO FIND A DATE. 262 00:10:10,533 --> 00:10:15,103 - NO! I MEAN, I KNOW WHAT YOU SHOULD DO. 263 00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:17,470 YOU JUST GOT OUT OF A RELATIONSHIP, 264 00:10:17,467 --> 00:10:19,267 SO YOU NEED A NON-THREATENING DATE. 265 00:10:19,267 --> 00:10:21,427 SOMEONE WHO WON'T GET ALL HANDSY AND FRESH. 266 00:10:21,433 --> 00:10:23,603 LIKE--LIKE WOODIE! - HUH? 267 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:25,770 - HE'S PRACTICALLY A EUNUCH. - WHAT? 268 00:10:25,767 --> 00:10:28,067 - COME ON, WOODIE, YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS YOUR PROM. 269 00:10:28,067 --> 00:10:29,967 AND THE THOUGHT OF JEENA GOING WITH SOME DOUCHE BAG 270 00:10:29,967 --> 00:10:31,797 MAKES ME WANT TO HURL MYSELF OFF A CLIFF. 271 00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:33,800 WE'LL TAKE A LIMO! 272 00:10:38,433 --> 00:10:41,203 - THANKS FOR STAYING SOBER WITH ME, MONDO. 273 00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:44,270 - I'M THE DESIGNATED DADDY. I HAVE TO STAY SOBER. 274 00:10:44,267 --> 00:10:47,267 [water pipe bubbles] - YOU AND ME BOTH, MAN. 275 00:10:47,267 --> 00:10:49,767 - [laughs] OH, WOODIE. 276 00:10:52,533 --> 00:10:54,633 - HEY, LET'S PLAY A GAME WHERE WE SWITCH SEATS 277 00:10:54,633 --> 00:10:57,203 AND STOP TOUCHING EACH OTHER FOR THE REST OF THE LIMO RIDE. 278 00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:03,200 [siren blares] OH, WHAT THE EFFIN'-EFF? 279 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:04,300 - EVENING, MA'AM. 280 00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:05,600 YOU HAD ANYTHING TO DRINK TONIGHT? 281 00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:08,170 - I HAVEN'T HAD A [hiccups] THING. 282 00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:11,067 - OKAY, WOULD YOU MIND BREATHING INTO THIS, THEN? 283 00:11:11,067 --> 00:11:15,067 - GO FETCH IT. YOU PIGS LIKE MUD, DON'TCHA? 284 00:11:15,067 --> 00:11:16,867 - YOU JUST DECLINED A BREATHALYZER. 285 00:11:16,867 --> 00:11:18,867 I'M GONNA HAVE TO TAKE YOU DOWNTOWN. 286 00:11:18,867 --> 00:11:21,327 - OKAY, OFFICER. SORRY. I'M BEING DIFFICULT. 287 00:11:21,333 --> 00:11:24,433 IT'S JUST THAT...I HATE BACON! [squeals like a pig] 288 00:11:24,433 --> 00:11:28,073 [bleep] PIG! [tires screech] 289 00:11:28,067 --> 00:11:30,927 [dance music plays] 290 00:11:30,933 --> 00:11:34,273 * * 291 00:11:34,267 --> 00:11:35,967 - REALLY, TURK? HER? 292 00:11:35,967 --> 00:11:37,867 - THAT'S RIGHT. YOU WANT A SANDWICH? 293 00:11:37,867 --> 00:11:40,427 HOW 'BOUT I FIX YOU A PEANUT BUTTER AND JEALOUS? 294 00:11:40,433 --> 00:11:41,373 [laughs] 295 00:11:42,867 --> 00:11:46,167 - THAT SHOULD BE ME GETTING SLAPPED BY BJ. 296 00:11:46,167 --> 00:11:50,827 D-D-D-D-DJ SMART CHOICES COMING AT YOU 297 00:11:50,833 --> 00:11:53,673 WITH THE FRESHEST BEATS, RHYMES, AND SAT QUESTIONS. 298 00:11:53,667 --> 00:11:57,197 WE'RE GONNA ROCK OUT WITH OUR BLANKS OUT. 299 00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,400 TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES, CHILDREN, 300 00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:00,900 BECAUSE THE ANSWER IS SOCKS! 301 00:12:00,900 --> 00:12:04,630 - DANG, LOOK AT ALL THESE FLAVORS OF BALONEY! 302 00:12:04,633 --> 00:12:08,333 - DON'T JUDGE US. WE'RE EATING FOR FOUR! 303 00:12:14,933 --> 00:12:18,073 LOOK HOW MANY BALLS I CAN FIT IN MY MOUTH. 304 00:12:18,067 --> 00:12:20,667 - [nervous chuckle] OKAY... 305 00:12:20,667 --> 00:12:23,627 HEY, LET'S GO DANCE, MISTER HEAT ON FEET. 306 00:12:23,633 --> 00:12:25,433 - I CAN'T REALLY DANCE. 307 00:12:25,433 --> 00:12:28,403 BUT WE CAN TAP OUR FEET AND HUM. 308 00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:29,930 - [sighs] 309 00:12:29,933 --> 00:12:32,573 [humming] 310 00:12:32,567 --> 00:12:33,827 - I'M SORRY, COULD YOU NOT HUM? 311 00:12:33,833 --> 00:12:35,573 IT'S KINDA MAKING ME NAUSEAS. 312 00:12:35,567 --> 00:12:37,767 * * 313 00:12:37,767 --> 00:12:40,297 - WELL, WELL, WELL, 314 00:12:40,300 --> 00:12:44,300 IF IT ISN'T MR. WADSKA, ALL BY HIS LONESOME. 315 00:12:44,300 --> 00:12:47,370 - YEAH, WE KNEW YOU WERE LYING ABOUT HAVING A WOMAN. 316 00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:49,127 - WADSKA, I'M HAVING SO MUCH FUN. 317 00:12:49,133 --> 00:12:53,073 CAN WE GO DANCE? OH, OF COURSE, 318 00:12:53,067 --> 00:12:55,067 MILA KUNIS. 319 00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:56,667 TA-TA, GENTLEMEN. 320 00:12:56,667 --> 00:13:00,267 IN THE WORDS OF MY MENTOR/TORMENTOR TURK, 321 00:13:00,267 --> 00:13:01,397 SUCK IT! 322 00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:04,970 - OH, SHE'S WAY HOTTER THAN MY DATE. 323 00:13:04,967 --> 00:13:07,367 - [grunting] ALMOST THERE. 324 00:13:07,367 --> 00:13:10,067 OH, GOD, IT'S NO USE. 325 00:13:10,067 --> 00:13:11,727 I'LL NEVER SQUEEZE THROUGH THESE BARS. 326 00:13:11,733 --> 00:13:13,103 - WOULD YOU LIKE A SANDWICH, MA'AM? 327 00:13:13,100 --> 00:13:15,630 WHAT IS IT, A HAM SANDWICH, PORKY PIG? 328 00:13:15,633 --> 00:13:18,573 - OH, MY GOD. VONEETA? - DUNCAN. 329 00:13:18,567 --> 00:13:21,227 MY LITTLE PRINCE. IS THAT REALLY YOU? 330 00:13:21,233 --> 00:13:24,773 - OH, LOSING YOU WAS MY LIFE'S LARGEST REGRET. 331 00:13:24,767 --> 00:13:26,597 PLEASE, LET ME EXPLAIN. 332 00:13:26,600 --> 00:13:28,270 I WAS ON MY WAY TO MEET YOU WHEN I WAS HIT 333 00:13:28,267 --> 00:13:29,627 BY A DRUNK DRIVER. 334 00:13:29,633 --> 00:13:33,473 [truck horn honking] 335 00:13:33,467 --> 00:13:36,067 I ENDED UP IN A COMA FOR 15 YEARS, 336 00:13:36,067 --> 00:13:38,197 AND WHEN I CAME TO, I DEDICATED MY LIFE 337 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:41,100 TO PROTECTING CITIZENS FROM THE SCOURGE OF ALCOHOL ABUSE, 338 00:13:41,100 --> 00:13:43,330 AND BECAME A POLICE OFFICER. 339 00:13:43,333 --> 00:13:45,373 BUT I NEVER STOPPED THINKING OF YOU. 340 00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:47,227 AND I WOULD LOVE A SECOND CHANCE. 341 00:13:47,233 --> 00:13:48,633 - FINE. 342 00:13:48,633 --> 00:13:51,303 BUT TRY NOT TO SCREW IT UP THIS TIME, YOU SELFISH PRICK. 343 00:13:51,300 --> 00:13:57,400 * * 344 00:13:57,400 --> 00:13:59,400 - OOH, YES, SPANK IT AGAIN. 345 00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,370 OOH! [laughs] 346 00:14:01,367 --> 00:14:03,797 - EXCUSE US FOR A SECOND? 347 00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:07,200 - DUDE, THIS IS WAY MORE FUN THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE. 348 00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:09,330 - MAYBE TOO MUCH FUN! 349 00:14:09,333 --> 00:14:12,273 [angry grunts] 350 00:14:12,267 --> 00:14:14,927 - WHAT ARE YOU DOING? ARE WE BRO DANCING? 351 00:14:14,933 --> 00:14:17,603 - NO, WE'RE FIGHTING. 352 00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:20,170 AND YOU JUST KICKED MY ASS. 353 00:14:20,167 --> 00:14:23,127 OH, WHO AM I KIDDING? YOU'RE THE BETTER MAN 354 00:14:23,133 --> 00:14:27,103 WITH YOUR CHISELED GOOD LOOKS AND PERFECT HAIR. 355 00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:29,400 JUST PROMISE ME YOU WON'T HURT HER. 356 00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:31,830 - BRO, I'VE BEEN TALKING YOU UP TO JEENA ALL NIGHT. 357 00:14:31,833 --> 00:14:33,903 - YOU--YOU HAVE? 358 00:14:33,900 --> 00:14:36,730 - YEAH. I'M TOTALLY GETTING YOU IN THERE, DUDE. 359 00:14:36,733 --> 00:14:39,573 * * 360 00:14:39,567 --> 00:14:41,527 I REQUESTED THIS LITTLE DITTY. 361 00:14:41,533 --> 00:14:43,073 NOW, GO ASK HER TO DANCE. 362 00:14:43,067 --> 00:14:44,867 I'LL GO ENTERTAIN DEE-DEE FOR YOU. 363 00:14:44,867 --> 00:14:46,227 - THANKS, MAN. 364 00:14:49,367 --> 00:14:51,267 HEY, JEENA. 365 00:14:51,267 --> 00:14:52,327 I WAS WONDERING IF YOU WANTED TO, 366 00:14:52,333 --> 00:14:53,403 IF YOU'RE NOT BUSY... 367 00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:55,930 - MONDO, THIS SONG IS GONNA END SOON. 368 00:14:55,933 --> 00:14:58,533 * * 369 00:14:58,533 --> 00:14:59,873 CAN I TELL YOU SOMETHING? 370 00:14:59,867 --> 00:15:02,627 ALL NIGHT, I'VE BEEN WATCHING YOU WITH DEE-DEE, 371 00:15:02,633 --> 00:15:04,933 AND I KNOW IT SOUNDS WEIRD, BUT... 372 00:15:04,933 --> 00:15:08,103 I FEEL MYSELF GETTING A LITTLE...JEALOUS. 373 00:15:08,100 --> 00:15:11,670 - ALL I EVER AM IS JEALOUS. AND HUNGRY SOMETIMES. 374 00:15:11,667 --> 00:15:13,297 BUT MOSTLY JEALOUS. 375 00:15:13,300 --> 00:15:15,930 AND I'M REALLY HAPPY YOU CAME TONIGHT. 376 00:15:15,933 --> 00:15:16,973 - ME TOO. 377 00:15:16,967 --> 00:15:24,527 * * 378 00:15:24,533 --> 00:15:25,933 - DUDE, IT'S HAPPENING. 379 00:15:25,933 --> 00:15:27,433 - I KNOW. AND YOU'RE RUINING IT. 380 00:15:27,433 --> 00:15:28,873 - NO, IT'S DEE-DEE! 381 00:15:28,867 --> 00:15:30,427 - OH, HERE IT COMES. 382 00:15:30,433 --> 00:15:32,673 - WHOA! 383 00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:33,797 - BALLS! 384 00:15:37,267 --> 00:15:40,197 - [panting] DEE-DEE, ARE YOU OKAY? 385 00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,270 I GOT HERE AS FAST AS I COULD. 386 00:15:42,267 --> 00:15:44,127 WHY AM I SO OUT OF BREATH? 387 00:15:44,133 --> 00:15:45,933 I RAN FOR, LIKE, FOUR SECONDS. 388 00:15:45,933 --> 00:15:47,333 - OH, I'M FINE. 389 00:15:47,333 --> 00:15:50,233 I'M JUST DROPPING THE KID OFF AT THE POOL...FOR REAL! 390 00:15:50,233 --> 00:15:52,073 AAAAAAH! - OKAY! 391 00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:53,927 OKAY, REMEMBER TO BREATHE. 392 00:15:53,933 --> 00:15:55,973 BREATHE! BREATHE! - [crying out] 393 00:15:55,967 --> 00:15:59,297 - I'M OUT OF BREATH AGAIN. I'M IN TERRIBLE SHAPE. 394 00:15:59,300 --> 00:16:02,270 * * 395 00:16:02,267 --> 00:16:04,267 - BE RIGHT BACK, TURK. 396 00:16:04,267 --> 00:16:07,767 I HAVE A LITTLE SURPRISE FOR YOU. 397 00:16:07,767 --> 00:16:09,397 EVERYONE, STOP TALKING. 398 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:12,170 I'M SURE YOU ALL REMEMBER, SIX MONTHS AGO, 399 00:16:12,167 --> 00:16:14,597 TURK PUBLICLY BROKE UP WITH ME FOR JEENA. 400 00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:17,400 I WAS, LIKE, REALLY EMBARRASSED. 401 00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:18,830 BUT NOW THAT TURK AND I ARE BACK TOGETHER, 402 00:16:18,833 --> 00:16:21,103 I JUST WANT TO SAY... 403 00:16:21,100 --> 00:16:22,600 YOU'RE A LOSER AND A TOOL. 404 00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:23,970 AND YOU HAVE ONE BALL, AND IT'S GROSS. 405 00:16:23,967 --> 00:16:28,497 YOU JUST GOT DUMPED, YOU STUPID BITCH! 406 00:16:28,500 --> 00:16:32,070 [laughter] 407 00:16:32,067 --> 00:16:34,427 * * 408 00:16:34,433 --> 00:16:37,433 - OH, SORRY, SIR. 409 00:16:37,433 --> 00:16:40,073 * * 410 00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:41,267 OH, MY GOD. 411 00:16:41,267 --> 00:16:44,267 WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING AT A HIGH SCHOOL DANCE? 412 00:16:44,267 --> 00:16:46,827 I'M MILA KUNIS! 413 00:16:46,833 --> 00:16:49,503 WHAT'S HAPPENING? WHERE AM I? 414 00:16:49,500 --> 00:16:50,970 - THERE'S MY GIRL! 415 00:16:50,967 --> 00:16:52,527 - HAVING A BALL? 416 00:16:52,533 --> 00:16:54,773 - ALL RIGHT, I GUESS I DESERVE THAT. 417 00:16:54,767 --> 00:16:57,597 - YEAH, YOU DO. BUT MILAN SUCKS. 418 00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,400 COME ON, I'LL GIVE YOU A PITY DANCE. 419 00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:01,770 - ALL RIGHT! OH, YOU SAID PITY. 420 00:17:01,767 --> 00:17:04,067 I THOUGHT YOU SAID TI-- - YEAH, I KNOW. 421 00:17:04,067 --> 00:17:05,667 - PUSH! - OH, GOD! 422 00:17:05,667 --> 00:17:08,467 - DON'T PUSH ME. PUSH THE BABY OUT OF YOU. 423 00:17:08,467 --> 00:17:11,527 - I'M SORRY. OKAY, OKAY. I'M PUSHING! 424 00:17:11,533 --> 00:17:13,973 - I GOT A PAPER TOWEL. OH... 425 00:17:13,967 --> 00:17:16,167 VERY AMNIOTIC, VERY UMBILICAL. 426 00:17:16,167 --> 00:17:17,827 I'LL GO GET ONE MORE. 427 00:17:17,833 --> 00:17:19,333 - HERE IT COMES. 428 00:17:19,333 --> 00:17:21,203 - AAAAAAH! 429 00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:22,670 [squlitch] - BABY! 430 00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:23,667 [baby crying] 431 00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:26,967 YOU'RE A MIRACLE. 432 00:17:26,967 --> 00:17:29,527 A DISGUSTING LITTLE MIRACLE. 433 00:17:29,533 --> 00:17:32,803 - OH, I'M GONNA NAME HIM AFTER HIS DADDY... 434 00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:36,630 CASA. CASA MALIBU SPEARS. 435 00:17:36,633 --> 00:17:38,103 - MY BABY BOY! 436 00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:42,700 DEE-DEE, I'VE DECIDED I WANT TO BE A PART OF HIS LIFE. 437 00:17:42,700 --> 00:17:44,930 - GREAT. ALTHOUGH I WISH YOU HAD MADE THAT DECISION, 438 00:17:44,933 --> 00:17:46,503 LIKE, THREE MINUTES EARLIER. 439 00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:49,970 - OH. HEY, WOODIE. 440 00:17:49,967 --> 00:17:52,597 TURNS OUT MY DATE HAS MORE DADDY ISSUES THAN I DO. 441 00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:55,130 - DUDE, THIS IS YOUR CHANCE. GET IN THERE! 442 00:17:55,133 --> 00:17:59,073 - EXCUSE ME, MISS DANCE, CAN I HAVE A BJ? 443 00:17:59,067 --> 00:18:02,067 OOPS. [laughs] 444 00:18:02,067 --> 00:18:04,797 * * 445 00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:08,400 - BALL. 446 00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:11,070 [crying] 447 00:18:11,067 --> 00:18:15,127 - OH, DUNCAN, I'M TREMBLING JUST BEING HERE WITH YOU. 448 00:18:15,133 --> 00:18:17,373 OH, NO, SCRATCH THAT. MY SCAMP'S IN NEUTRAL. 449 00:18:17,367 --> 00:18:22,627 - OH, I WILL NEVER LEAVE YOUR SIDE AGAIN. 450 00:18:22,633 --> 00:18:24,373 IS THAT ALCOHOL? 451 00:18:24,367 --> 00:18:26,697 THOSE KIDS ARE BREAKING THE LAW! 452 00:18:26,700 --> 00:18:28,370 I'M GONNA HAVE TO MEET UP WITH YOU LATER, 453 00:18:28,367 --> 00:18:29,567 MY BUTTERBARGE. 454 00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:31,697 - DUNCAN, IF YOU LEAVE ME NOW, 455 00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:32,900 THERE'S NOT GONNA BE A LATER. 456 00:18:32,900 --> 00:18:35,270 IT'S THE VADGE OR THE BADGE. 457 00:18:37,733 --> 00:18:41,703 - I'M SORRY, DUTY CALLS. 458 00:18:41,700 --> 00:18:42,770 UNH! [thud] 459 00:18:42,767 --> 00:18:45,197 - WADSKA, HELP! 460 00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:47,730 - I HAVE NEVER SEEN THAT WOMAN BEFORE IN MY LIFE! 461 00:18:47,733 --> 00:18:50,973 HANG ON. OKAY, TAKE HER AWAY. 462 00:18:50,967 --> 00:18:53,367 - [crying] 463 00:18:53,367 --> 00:18:54,727 - HEY, VONEETA, I WAS WONDERING-- 464 00:18:54,733 --> 00:18:57,633 - SHUT IT, GURNIEL. I'M GONNA RAW-DOG THAT ASS. 465 00:18:57,633 --> 00:19:00,273 - OH! 466 00:19:00,267 --> 00:19:03,297 - ECCH, MONDO, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR TUX? 467 00:19:03,300 --> 00:19:04,770 YOU GET SHOT OR SOMETHING? 468 00:19:04,767 --> 00:19:07,167 - I WISH. JUST HAD A ROUGH NIGHT. 469 00:19:07,167 --> 00:19:08,497 - [scoffs] YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE. 470 00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:11,430 I SAW ON TMZ THAT MILA KUNIS WAS ARRESTED 471 00:19:11,433 --> 00:19:13,733 FOR SUPPLYING MINORS WITH ALCOHOL. 472 00:19:13,733 --> 00:19:16,703 - NO OFFENSE, MA, I JUST-- I WANNA BE ALONE. 473 00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:18,370 - OKAY. NO PROBLEM. 474 00:19:18,367 --> 00:19:19,927 JEENA'S HERE, BUT I'LL JUST TELL HER 475 00:19:19,933 --> 00:19:21,203 YOU'LL TALK TO HER TOMORROW. 476 00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:26,130 - I CAN TALK NOW! TELL JEENA I CAN TALK NOW! 477 00:19:26,133 --> 00:19:27,173 - [laughing] 478 00:19:32,900 --> 00:19:35,770 SO WHERE'D YOU RUN OFF TO? 479 00:19:35,767 --> 00:19:37,897 - I JUST FIGURED YOU WERE GOING HOME WITH TURK. 480 00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:40,730 - NO. I WAS JUST GIVING HIM A PITY DANCE. 481 00:19:40,733 --> 00:19:42,233 - EVEN WORSE! 482 00:19:42,233 --> 00:19:44,433 OH, YOU SAID PITY. 483 00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:47,433 - GOD, DO I HAVE A SPEECH IMPEDIMENT OR SOMETHING? 484 00:19:47,433 --> 00:19:51,103 MONDO, I WAS ACTUALLY THINKING ABOUT YOU ALL NIGHT. 485 00:19:51,100 --> 00:19:52,170 - REALLY? 486 00:19:52,167 --> 00:19:54,067 BECAUSE I THINK ABOUT YOU CONSTANTLY. 487 00:19:54,067 --> 00:19:56,227 NOT LIKE A STALKER, MORE LIKE AN OBSESSIVE FAN 488 00:19:56,233 --> 00:19:57,703 WHO JUST WANTS TO SMELL YOUR HAIR. 489 00:19:57,700 --> 00:19:59,870 ALL RIGHT, THAT SOUNDED A LITTLE CREEPY. 490 00:19:59,867 --> 00:20:01,497 WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS-- 491 00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:06,370 MMM... 492 00:20:06,367 --> 00:20:08,267 - SORRY, I INTERRUPTED. 493 00:20:08,267 --> 00:20:09,297 YOU WERE SAYING? 494 00:20:09,300 --> 00:20:12,030 - NOTHING I SAY MATTERS. 495 00:20:15,300 --> 00:20:16,970 - AND THEN SHE JUST KISSED YOU? 496 00:20:16,967 --> 00:20:20,197 VERY COOL. VERY COMING-OF-AGE-ICAL. 497 00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:21,530 - I KNOW, RIGHT? 498 00:20:21,533 --> 00:20:22,603 HOW'D IT GO WITH YOU? 499 00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:24,570 - HJ WAS AWESOME. 500 00:20:24,567 --> 00:20:26,297 - I THOUGHT YOU ENDED UP WITH BJ. 501 00:20:26,300 --> 00:20:27,930 - I DID. 502 00:20:27,933 --> 00:20:29,903 - WOODIE, REMEMBER ALL THOSE TIMES 503 00:20:29,900 --> 00:20:31,900 I WAS DEPRESSED ABOUT LEAVING JERSEY 504 00:20:31,900 --> 00:20:33,670 AND MOVING TO PLAYA DEL TORO? 505 00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:35,967 - YEAH. - WELL, FORGET IT. 506 00:20:35,967 --> 00:20:37,667 I LOVE IT HERE! 507 00:20:37,667 --> 00:20:40,897 both: BOOSTAMOOCHA! 508 00:20:40,947 --> 00:20:45,497 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 36198

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