Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:03,233 --> 00:00:05,873
- AW, MAN,
CASA'S GOING TO THE DANCE
2
00:00:05,867 --> 00:00:07,097
WITH BJ KUNTZ.
3
00:00:07,100 --> 00:00:08,700
- I THOUGHT
HE LIKED HJ.
4
00:00:08,700 --> 00:00:11,770
- NOBODY WOULD CHOOSE HJ
OVER BJ.
5
00:00:11,767 --> 00:00:13,027
- HOW DO YOU KEEP
FINDING OUT ABOUT
6
00:00:13,033 --> 00:00:15,073
ALL THESE DATES
TO THE PROM?
7
00:00:15,067 --> 00:00:17,727
- THAT SITE WADSKA SET UP--
HIGH SCHOOL MASTER DATER.
8
00:00:17,733 --> 00:00:21,133
HE GIVES SUPER-INSTANT UPDATES
ON EVERYONE'S PROM STATUS.
9
00:00:21,133 --> 00:00:22,673
- TISSUES?
WHAT DO THEY THINK?
10
00:00:22,667 --> 00:00:24,597
I'LL BE AT HOME
CRYING ALL NIGHT?
11
00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:26,070
- UH...NO.
12
00:00:26,067 --> 00:00:27,297
- MMM.
13
00:00:27,300 --> 00:00:29,770
- I CAN'T BELIEVE
JEENA'S STILL WITH TURK.
14
00:00:29,767 --> 00:00:32,497
LATELY I'VE BEEN HAVING
THESE REOCCURRING FANTASIES
15
00:00:32,500 --> 00:00:35,930
WHERE I'M DANCING
WITH HER.
16
00:00:35,933 --> 00:00:38,933
[mellow dance music]
17
00:00:38,933 --> 00:00:43,933
* *
18
00:00:43,933 --> 00:00:45,303
AND THE NEXT THING I KNOW,
19
00:00:45,300 --> 00:00:48,500
I'M COVERED IN BLOOD,
CRYING INTO A PLATE OF RAVIOLI.
20
00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:50,100
- THAT'S TERRIBLE.
- NO!
21
00:00:50,100 --> 00:00:52,970
IT WAS LOBSTER,
WITH A NICE BUTTER-SAGE SAUCE.
22
00:00:52,967 --> 00:00:54,497
- PLUG YOUR LITTLE
PLEASURE HOLES, PIGLETS!
23
00:00:54,500 --> 00:00:57,430
TODAY WE'RE GONNA HAVE A VERY
SERIOUS TALK ABOUT ALCOHOL,
24
00:00:57,433 --> 00:00:58,703
AND HOW IT'S SUCH
A GINORMOUS PROBLEM
25
00:00:58,700 --> 00:01:00,070
AT SCHOOL DANCES.
26
00:01:00,067 --> 00:01:01,327
IT CAN MAKE YOU HAVE SEX,
27
00:01:01,333 --> 00:01:03,433
WHICH COULD LEAD TO CONTRACTING
A DEBILITATING DISEASE
28
00:01:03,433 --> 00:01:05,273
CALLED "BABIES."
29
00:01:05,267 --> 00:01:07,267
LITTLE DEE-DEE HERE
IS A CAUTIONARY TALE.
30
00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:09,827
- I'M FIXIN'
TO NAME IT MALIBU.
31
00:01:09,833 --> 00:01:12,073
IT'S A RUM, IT'S A CAR,
32
00:01:12,067 --> 00:01:15,097
AND A CLASSY PLACE
TO PARK YOUR RV.
33
00:01:15,100 --> 00:01:18,070
- TO ILLUSTRATE, WE'RE GONNA
WATCH AND EDUCATIONAL VIDEO,
34
00:01:18,067 --> 00:01:19,597
RECENTLY CONVERTED TO 3-D.
35
00:01:19,600 --> 00:01:22,770
- CHILDBIRTH:
FROM CONCEPTION TO DIVORCE.
36
00:01:22,767 --> 00:01:25,767
- [groaning]
- PUSH. PUSH.
37
00:01:25,767 --> 00:01:27,527
[wet squishy sounds]
[all gasp]
38
00:01:27,533 --> 00:01:28,633
- HOLY LORD.
39
00:01:28,633 --> 00:01:32,603
- WELCOME TO THIS WORLD,
MONTGOMERY BRANDO.
40
00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:33,600
[baby coos]
41
00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:36,070
[laughter]
42
00:01:36,067 --> 00:01:39,367
[upbeat rock music]
43
00:01:39,367 --> 00:01:43,697
* *
44
00:01:43,700 --> 00:01:45,770
- MOM, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME
45
00:01:45,767 --> 00:01:48,967
ABOUT THE CHILDBIRTH VIDEO?
- YOU SAW THAT?
46
00:01:48,967 --> 00:01:50,867
- I'VE NEVER BEEN
MORE EMBARRASSED.
47
00:01:50,867 --> 00:01:53,127
- WHAT ABOUT THE TIME WHEN
YOU FARTED ON SANTA'S LAP?
48
00:01:53,133 --> 00:01:56,303
- I WAS 13! AND YOU KNOW
WHAT EGGNOG DOES TO ME.
49
00:01:56,300 --> 00:01:58,070
DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT!
50
00:01:58,067 --> 00:02:00,227
- I WAS A POOR,
SINGLE MOM BACK THEN.
51
00:02:00,233 --> 00:02:01,633
THINGS WERE HARD.
52
00:02:01,633 --> 00:02:03,233
[entry bells jingle]
53
00:02:06,100 --> 00:02:08,070
- MY ANGELS!
MY [bleep] ANGELS!
54
00:02:08,067 --> 00:02:10,697
- THEN THE LOCAL COLLEGE
OFFERED ME GOOD MONEY
55
00:02:10,700 --> 00:02:13,670
TO BE IN THAT VIDEO AND PAY
FOR ALL OF MY HOSPITAL BILLS.
56
00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,597
I DID IT SO I COULD
SURVIVE.
57
00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:17,470
SO WE COULD SURVIVE.
58
00:02:17,467 --> 00:02:21,067
- WOW, I HAD NO IDEA
HOW HARD IT WAS FOR YOU.
59
00:02:21,067 --> 00:02:24,267
- BUT IT WAS ALL WORTH IT
BECAUSE I GOT TO HAVE YOU.
60
00:02:24,267 --> 00:02:26,927
- MA, ARE THERE ANY OTHER
EMBARRASSING VIDEOS
61
00:02:26,933 --> 00:02:28,273
I SHOULD KNOW ABOUT?
62
00:02:28,267 --> 00:02:29,867
- WELL, ONE, BUT YOU KNOW,
63
00:02:29,867 --> 00:02:32,297
IT WAS JUST USED TO PAY
FOR YOUR SPEECH THERAPY.
64
00:02:32,300 --> 00:02:36,300
- * I'M A WIDDLE POOPER
SHORT AND STOUT *
65
00:02:36,300 --> 00:02:39,900
* I EAT PASTHCETTI
AND MEATBALLSTH COME OUT *
66
00:02:39,900 --> 00:02:41,530
[laughing]
67
00:02:41,533 --> 00:02:43,673
[air horn blares]
68
00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:45,697
- ALL HANDS ON DECK
AS I REVEAL TO YOU
69
00:02:45,700 --> 00:02:48,130
THE THEME FOR THIS YEAR'S
JUNIOR PROM.
70
00:02:48,133 --> 00:02:50,503
"JUST THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG."
71
00:02:50,500 --> 00:02:52,070
all: BOO!
72
00:02:52,067 --> 00:02:53,097
[rip]
73
00:02:53,100 --> 00:02:54,870
[all cheer]
74
00:02:54,867 --> 00:02:57,597
all: JUST THE TIP!
JUST THE TIP...
75
00:02:57,600 --> 00:03:00,430
- OLIVER.
DICK NOODLE.
76
00:03:00,433 --> 00:03:02,403
- YOU KNOW IT'S NUDELL!
77
00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,500
- NUDELL.
78
00:03:04,500 --> 00:03:07,200
- SO, WADSKA,
ARE YOU GOING TO THE DANCE?
79
00:03:07,200 --> 00:03:08,870
WOULDN'T MISS IT!
80
00:03:08,867 --> 00:03:10,767
THE SECOND LIFE
SWEETHEARTS' JAMBOREE
81
00:03:10,767 --> 00:03:13,167
IS GONNA BE THE ONLINE EVENT
OF THE SEASON!
82
00:03:13,167 --> 00:03:16,297
I EVEN PURCHASED A NEW
GLADIATOR COMBAT TUXEDO,
83
00:03:16,300 --> 00:03:18,170
COMPLETE WITH
ARMORED CUMMERBUND
84
00:03:18,167 --> 00:03:19,427
AND CANE-SWORD.
85
00:03:19,433 --> 00:03:21,333
- ACTUALLY, WE'RE GOING
TO THE REAL DANCE
86
00:03:21,333 --> 00:03:22,873
WITH REAL DATES.
87
00:03:22,867 --> 00:03:24,597
- WE'RE NOT LOSERS.
88
00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:28,070
[laughter]
89
00:03:28,067 --> 00:03:30,197
- I WAS J.K.in'
ALL OVER YOUR FACES!
90
00:03:30,200 --> 00:03:32,500
OF COURSE I HAVE
A REAL DATE.
91
00:03:32,500 --> 00:03:35,170
- IS SHE A MAIL-ORDER BRIDE?
92
00:03:35,167 --> 00:03:38,267
- [gasps]
HOW DARE YOU!
93
00:03:38,267 --> 00:03:41,567
DAMN, NOW I NEED A PLAN "B."
94
00:03:41,567 --> 00:03:43,427
- I BEEN THINKING ABOUT
OUR SPECIAL NIGHT,
95
00:03:43,433 --> 00:03:47,173
AND I GOT US A HOTEL ROOM
AT THE ONE & DONE MOTOR LODGE.
96
00:03:47,167 --> 00:03:49,697
- OH, SWEET! WE'LL HAVE
A KICKASS AFTER PARTY THERE.
97
00:03:49,700 --> 00:03:51,800
- OH, NO CAN DO, BABE.
98
00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:54,170
GOT A BIT OF
A SCHEDULING CONFLICT.
99
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:55,897
I WENT IN WITH CHESTER
AND CASA.
100
00:03:55,900 --> 00:03:57,800
YOU AND I HAVE THE ROOM
FROM 7:00 TO 9:00,
101
00:03:57,800 --> 00:03:59,800
AND THEN AGAIN
FROM 2:00 TO 4:00.
102
00:03:59,800 --> 00:04:03,270
- TURK, ALL I WANTED WAS
ONE ROMANTIC NIGHT.
103
00:04:03,267 --> 00:04:05,697
AND INSTEAD,
YOU "SCHEDULE ME" FOR SEX
104
00:04:05,700 --> 00:04:07,430
IN A HOTEL ROOM,
LIKE A PROSTITUTE.
105
00:04:07,433 --> 00:04:08,803
- AW, BABE,
THAT'S NOT TRUE.
106
00:04:08,800 --> 00:04:10,170
YOU'RE NOT GETTING PAID
FOR THIS.
107
00:04:10,167 --> 00:04:12,597
YOU'RE DOING IT PRO-BONER.
[laughs]
108
00:04:15,867 --> 00:04:18,327
- MY TAPIOCA!
MY [bleep] TAPIOCA!
109
00:04:18,333 --> 00:04:21,133
- [crying]
110
00:04:21,133 --> 00:04:24,703
- I GOTTA GO TALK
TO HER.
111
00:04:24,700 --> 00:04:25,970
- [crying]
112
00:04:25,967 --> 00:04:28,267
- DEE-DEE, ARE--
ARE YOU OKAY?
113
00:04:28,267 --> 00:04:29,627
- WELL, LET'S SEE.
114
00:04:29,633 --> 00:04:32,533
I'M A BLOATED, LEAKING,
STRETCH-MARKED PIG.
115
00:04:32,533 --> 00:04:35,373
MY BABY-DADDY DUMPED ME,
NO ONE'S TAKING ME TO PROM,
116
00:04:35,367 --> 00:04:39,667
AND MY NIPPERS...LOOK...LIKE...
BURNT...TATER TOTS!
117
00:04:39,667 --> 00:04:42,427
I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT
YOU'RE GOING THROUGH.
118
00:04:42,433 --> 00:04:44,333
- REALLY?
BECAUSE YOU'RE FAT?
119
00:04:44,333 --> 00:04:47,603
- NO. MY MOM WENT THROUGH IT
ALONE TOO.
120
00:04:47,600 --> 00:04:50,700
- WELL, THANKS FOR TALKING
TO ME, MONDO,
121
00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:53,070
BUT YOU CAN GO BACK TO YOUR FUN
HIGH SCHOOL EXPERIENCE
122
00:04:53,067 --> 00:04:54,527
WHILE I CONTEMPLATE
MY RUINED LIFE
123
00:04:54,533 --> 00:04:57,403
AND EAT THIS TUREEN
OF PICKLES.
124
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,933
- HEY, DEE-DEE,
YOU KNOW,
125
00:05:01,933 --> 00:05:04,773
I--I DON'T HAVE ANYONE
TO GO TO THE PROM WITH.
126
00:05:04,767 --> 00:05:06,167
- [gasps]
REALLY?
127
00:05:06,167 --> 00:05:08,127
YOU'D WANNA GO WITH ME?
128
00:05:08,133 --> 00:05:10,073
OH, THANKS, MONDO.
129
00:05:10,067 --> 00:05:11,927
I'D LOVE TO BE YOUR DATE.
130
00:05:14,433 --> 00:05:16,533
- DUDE, BREAKING NEWS!
131
00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,203
TURK AND JEENA
JUST BROKE UP.
132
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:20,170
YOU CAN TOTALLY
GET IN THERE.
133
00:05:20,167 --> 00:05:21,767
- BA-EHHHHHH!
134
00:05:24,900 --> 00:05:28,530
- UHH! HOW WILL I EVER FIND
A BEAUTIFUL GIRL
135
00:05:28,533 --> 00:05:30,503
ON A CALIFORNIA BEACH?
136
00:05:30,500 --> 00:05:33,370
OH, SHE LOOKS TOO MUCH
LIKE A BOY.
137
00:05:33,367 --> 00:05:35,667
EW, SHE LOOKS TOO MUCH
LIKE A GIRL!
138
00:05:35,667 --> 00:05:37,497
THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE!
OOH!
139
00:05:39,267 --> 00:05:40,927
GREAT KELSO!
140
00:05:40,933 --> 00:05:45,303
IT'S TEN-TIME TEEN CHOICE AWARD
NOMINEE MILA KUNIS!
141
00:05:45,300 --> 00:05:47,900
- IT'S HER.
142
00:05:47,900 --> 00:05:50,200
all: MILA! MILA!
MILA! MILA! MILA!
143
00:05:52,200 --> 00:05:54,070
- REALLY? COME ON!
144
00:05:54,067 --> 00:05:55,827
I KNOW YOU GUYS NEED
TO MAKE A LIVING,
145
00:05:55,833 --> 00:05:59,173
BUT I'M A HUMAN BEING, AND
I'M ENTITLED TO SOME PRIVACY.
146
00:05:59,167 --> 00:06:00,597
- OH, SORRY, MISS KUNIS.
147
00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:03,770
YOUR WORDS HAVE
TOUCHED OUR HEARTS.
148
00:06:03,767 --> 00:06:06,527
NOW, COULD YOU SAY THEM AGAIN
WITH THIS BAG OF DRUGS
149
00:06:06,533 --> 00:06:08,873
AND A SLIPPED NIPPLE?
150
00:06:08,867 --> 00:06:09,927
- HYAH!
151
00:06:09,933 --> 00:06:11,203
[shutters snapping]
152
00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:12,600
- THIS IS MY CHANCE.
153
00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:15,500
QUICK, MILA,
GET YOUR KUNIS OVER HERE!
154
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:16,870
[bongos thumping]
155
00:06:16,867 --> 00:06:20,097
[camera shutters click]
[paparazzi wheezing]
156
00:06:22,667 --> 00:06:25,227
- [exhales] THANK YOU SO MUCH
FOR HELPING ME.
157
00:06:25,233 --> 00:06:27,433
IS THERE ANYTHING
I COULD DO FOR YOU?
158
00:06:27,433 --> 00:06:30,203
EXCEPT TALK ABOUT MY LESBIAN
SCENE WITH NATALIE PORTMAN.
159
00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:32,300
- HA! WHAT DO I LOOK LIKE,
160
00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:34,570
SOME KIND OF SEX-CRAZED
FANBOY?
161
00:06:34,567 --> 00:06:36,797
[laughs, gasps]
162
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,170
BUT NOW THAT YOU
MENTION IT,
163
00:06:38,167 --> 00:06:40,967
YOU CAN ACCOMPANY ME TO MY
HIGH SCHOOL DANCE THIS EVENING.
164
00:06:40,967 --> 00:06:43,327
- [chuckles]
I WAS THINKING MORE LIKE
165
00:06:43,333 --> 00:06:44,703
AN AUTOGRAPH
OR SOMETHING.
166
00:06:44,700 --> 00:06:47,230
- NO, I'M AFRAID
THAT WON'T DO.
167
00:06:47,233 --> 00:06:49,373
I'M A DESPERATE MAN.
168
00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:52,427
I NEED TO RUB YOU
IN DICK NOODLE'S FACE!
169
00:06:52,433 --> 00:06:55,573
UH, OKAY.
I'M GONNA GO NOW.
170
00:06:55,567 --> 00:06:56,597
DON'T FOLLOW ME.
171
00:06:56,600 --> 00:06:58,470
- WAIT, KUNIS, PLEASE.
- LET GO!
172
00:06:58,467 --> 00:07:00,097
- AAA--
- OH!
173
00:07:00,100 --> 00:07:01,700
MM...
174
00:07:01,700 --> 00:07:04,230
- MILA? MILA?
175
00:07:04,233 --> 00:07:05,633
- WHAT'S HAPPENING?
176
00:07:05,633 --> 00:07:07,633
I'M SO CONFUSED.
177
00:07:07,633 --> 00:07:09,833
I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHO I AM.
178
00:07:09,833 --> 00:07:12,773
- OH. WELL, I CAN
HELP YOU WITH THAT.
179
00:07:12,767 --> 00:07:15,727
YOU'RE MILA, MY DEVOTED
AND HORNY GIRLFRIEND,
180
00:07:15,733 --> 00:07:17,833
AND WE'VE GOT
A HIGH SCHOOL DANCE TO GET TO!
181
00:07:17,833 --> 00:07:20,673
[flatulence]
[laughter]
182
00:07:20,667 --> 00:07:22,197
- [gasps]
I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY
183
00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:24,470
EVER SINCE JEENA
STOLE TURK FROM ME.
184
00:07:24,467 --> 00:07:26,567
FEEL THIS, BITCHES.
REVENGE BUMPS.
185
00:07:26,567 --> 00:07:28,827
OOH, IF I HADN'T LASERED
ALL THE HAIR OFF MY BODY,
186
00:07:28,833 --> 00:07:30,503
IT'D BE STANDING ON END.
187
00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:34,370
HEY, TURK, HEARD YOU AND JEENA
TOTALLY BROKE UP.
188
00:07:34,367 --> 00:07:37,067
YEAH. I GOTTA BE FREE,
LIKE A BIRD,
189
00:07:37,067 --> 00:07:38,427
OR A EUROPEAN TITTY.
190
00:07:38,433 --> 00:07:41,873
- WELL, I DON'T HAVE A DATE
TO THE DANCE YET,
191
00:07:41,867 --> 00:07:43,527
SO IF YOU WANT,
YOU CAN ASK ME,
192
00:07:43,533 --> 00:07:45,403
AND I PROMISE NOT TO LAUGH
IN YOUR FACE.
193
00:07:45,400 --> 00:07:47,570
- THAT'S AN INTERESTING
PROPOSITION.
194
00:07:47,567 --> 00:07:50,467
GIVE ME A MOMENT TO CONFER
WITH MY ASSOCIATES.
195
00:07:50,467 --> 00:07:53,227
- ON THE DOWN SIDE,
SHE'S A BITCHY SLUT.
196
00:07:53,233 --> 00:07:54,473
- GOOD POINT.
197
00:07:54,467 --> 00:07:56,397
- ON THE UP SIDE,
SHE'S A SLUTTY BITCH.
198
00:07:56,400 --> 00:07:57,730
- EXCELLENT COUNTERPOINT.
199
00:07:57,733 --> 00:07:59,233
IT APPEARS WE'RE
A WELL-HUNG JURY.
200
00:07:59,233 --> 00:08:00,603
[laughs]
201
00:08:00,600 --> 00:08:03,070
AND CLOSING ARGUMENTS
REALLY WOULD PISS JEENA OFF.
202
00:08:03,067 --> 00:08:05,267
- [gulps]
203
00:08:05,267 --> 00:08:07,327
POP A SQUAT, SQUIRTER.
HERE'S AN EXTRA SEAT.
204
00:08:07,333 --> 00:08:08,673
- THANKS.
205
00:08:08,667 --> 00:08:10,897
- SO THERE'S BEEN A LOT
OF SCUTTLEBUTTS ON THE INTERNET
206
00:08:10,900 --> 00:08:12,400
ABOUT YOU NOT GOING
TO THE DANCE.
207
00:08:12,400 --> 00:08:14,900
I DON'T MEAN TO JUDGE,
BUT YOU'RE A STUPID IDIOT.
208
00:08:14,900 --> 00:08:16,170
YOU SHOULDN'T MISS
YOUR PROM.
209
00:08:16,167 --> 00:08:18,967
I MISSED MINE,
AND I REGRET IT TO THIS DAY.
210
00:08:18,967 --> 00:08:20,827
- REALLY?
- VERY REALLY.
211
00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:24,173
I WAS EXACTLY LIKE YOU
IN EVERY WAY.
212
00:08:24,167 --> 00:08:27,427
HIS NAME WAS DUNCAN.
HE WAS LIKE A PRINCE.
213
00:08:27,433 --> 00:08:29,173
- OOH, THAT SOUNDS NICE.
214
00:08:29,167 --> 00:08:31,967
- I MEAN PRINCE THE MUSICIAN,
BUT SMALLER.
215
00:08:31,967 --> 00:08:33,367
WE MET THE DAY OF THE DANCE
216
00:08:33,367 --> 00:08:36,197
AT THE FRIED PASTRY SHOP
I WORKED AT.
217
00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,070
HE ASKED ME TO PROM
AND SAID
218
00:08:38,067 --> 00:08:39,227
HE'D PICK ME UP
AT 8:00 THAT NIGHT.
219
00:08:39,233 --> 00:08:41,273
BUT I WAITED
AND I WAITED,
220
00:08:41,267 --> 00:08:45,227
AND HE NEVER EVER
SHOWED UP.
221
00:08:45,233 --> 00:08:47,273
I COULDN'T GET I TOUCH WITH HIM
BECAUSE BACK THEN
222
00:08:47,267 --> 00:08:49,567
THERE WASN'T EMAIL
OR CELL PHONES OR TEXTING.
223
00:08:49,567 --> 00:08:50,967
- WOW, THINGS HAVE
REALLY CHANGED.
224
00:08:50,967 --> 00:08:53,097
OR FACEBOOK OR TWITTER
OR GCHAT.
225
00:08:53,100 --> 00:08:54,130
- OH, WELL, THAT'S A LOT OF--
226
00:08:54,133 --> 00:08:56,173
- OR SKYPE OR INSTANT MESSENGER
OR BUZZ
227
00:08:56,167 --> 00:08:58,467
OR MISSED CONNECTIONS.
228
00:08:58,467 --> 00:09:00,867
WHAT, AM I HAVING A CONVERSATION
WITH A [bleep] WALL?
229
00:09:00,867 --> 00:09:02,767
- OH, SORRY. I WAS--
- THE REST OF THE SCHOOL YEAR
230
00:09:02,767 --> 00:09:04,697
I WAS STUCK LISTENING
TO MY STUPID CLASSMATES
231
00:09:04,700 --> 00:09:06,600
TALK ABOUT ALL
THE STUPID FUN THEY HAD.
232
00:09:06,600 --> 00:09:08,530
- HUH. YOU KNOW WHAT?
233
00:09:08,533 --> 00:09:10,433
I THINK I'M GONNA TAKE
YOUR ADVICE.
234
00:09:10,433 --> 00:09:11,873
THANKS.
235
00:09:11,867 --> 00:09:15,067
- SEÑOR CUERVO,
MEET MR. DANIELS.
236
00:09:15,067 --> 00:09:19,697
DON'T WORRY, THERE'S ROOM
IN HERE FOR BOTH Y'ALL.
237
00:09:19,700 --> 00:09:21,600
[beep]
238
00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:24,470
[crying out]
239
00:09:24,467 --> 00:09:26,927
- I HAVE NO BUSINESS HANGING OUT
WITH A PREGNANT GIRL.
240
00:09:26,933 --> 00:09:30,433
I JUST KILLED 180 BABIES
IN THE LAST TEN MINUTES.
241
00:09:30,433 --> 00:09:33,273
I'M A BABY KILLER,
THAT'S WHAT I AM.
242
00:09:33,267 --> 00:09:34,467
[giddy shudder]
243
00:09:34,467 --> 00:09:37,797
HEY, JEENA.
I HEARD ABOUT YOU AND TURK.
244
00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:39,230
- YEAH, IT'S WHATEVER.
245
00:09:39,233 --> 00:09:41,633
I SAW YOU'RE GOING
WITH DEE-DEE.
246
00:09:41,633 --> 00:09:43,603
- YEAH, IT SUCKS.
I MEAN, IT DOESN'T SUCK,
247
00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:45,470
IT'S JUST THAT I'M TAKING
A PREGNANT GIRL TO THE PROM,
248
00:09:45,467 --> 00:09:47,397
AND IT WOULD BE COOLER
IF IT WAS YOU.
249
00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:48,930
NOT THAT I THINK IT'D BE COOL
IF YOU WERE PREGNANT.
250
00:09:48,933 --> 00:09:50,233
I MEAN, I'D LOVE IT
IF YOU WERE PREGNANT,
251
00:09:50,233 --> 00:09:52,273
BUT IN THE FUTURE,
AND MAYBE BY ME.
252
00:09:52,267 --> 00:09:54,067
BUT THAT'S A CONVERSATION
WE'LL HAVE ONE DAY.
253
00:09:54,067 --> 00:09:55,667
YOU KNOW, WHEN I'M
FINANCIALLY STABLE.
254
00:09:55,667 --> 00:09:57,767
WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS
I REALLY WISH YOU WERE GOING
255
00:09:57,767 --> 00:10:00,097
'CAUSE I'M GONNA BE HEAT
ON FEET ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
256
00:10:00,100 --> 00:10:01,870
[humming dance beat]
- [laughs]
257
00:10:01,867 --> 00:10:03,627
WELL, I WAS GONNA GO
ANYWAY,
258
00:10:03,633 --> 00:10:05,403
BUT NOW I'M GONNA HAVE
TO BREAK OUT
259
00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:06,670
THE DOUBLE-DREAM HANDS.
260
00:10:06,667 --> 00:10:08,497
- YOU'RE GOING?
- YEAH.
261
00:10:08,500 --> 00:10:10,530
BUT I GUESS I HAVE
TO FIND A DATE.
262
00:10:10,533 --> 00:10:15,103
- NO! I MEAN,
I KNOW WHAT YOU SHOULD DO.
263
00:10:15,100 --> 00:10:17,470
YOU JUST GOT OUT
OF A RELATIONSHIP,
264
00:10:17,467 --> 00:10:19,267
SO YOU NEED
A NON-THREATENING DATE.
265
00:10:19,267 --> 00:10:21,427
SOMEONE WHO WON'T GET
ALL HANDSY AND FRESH.
266
00:10:21,433 --> 00:10:23,603
LIKE--LIKE WOODIE!
- HUH?
267
00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:25,770
- HE'S PRACTICALLY A EUNUCH.
- WHAT?
268
00:10:25,767 --> 00:10:28,067
- COME ON, WOODIE, YOU DON'T
WANT TO MISS YOUR PROM.
269
00:10:28,067 --> 00:10:29,967
AND THE THOUGHT OF JEENA
GOING WITH SOME DOUCHE BAG
270
00:10:29,967 --> 00:10:31,797
MAKES ME WANT TO HURL MYSELF
OFF A CLIFF.
271
00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:33,800
WE'LL TAKE A LIMO!
272
00:10:38,433 --> 00:10:41,203
- THANKS FOR STAYING SOBER
WITH ME, MONDO.
273
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:44,270
- I'M THE DESIGNATED DADDY.
I HAVE TO STAY SOBER.
274
00:10:44,267 --> 00:10:47,267
[water pipe bubbles]
- YOU AND ME BOTH, MAN.
275
00:10:47,267 --> 00:10:49,767
- [laughs]
OH, WOODIE.
276
00:10:52,533 --> 00:10:54,633
- HEY, LET'S PLAY A GAME
WHERE WE SWITCH SEATS
277
00:10:54,633 --> 00:10:57,203
AND STOP TOUCHING EACH OTHER
FOR THE REST OF THE LIMO RIDE.
278
00:11:00,500 --> 00:11:03,200
[siren blares]
OH, WHAT THE EFFIN'-EFF?
279
00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:04,300
- EVENING, MA'AM.
280
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:05,600
YOU HAD ANYTHING
TO DRINK TONIGHT?
281
00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:08,170
- I HAVEN'T HAD
A [hiccups] THING.
282
00:11:08,167 --> 00:11:11,067
- OKAY, WOULD YOU MIND
BREATHING INTO THIS, THEN?
283
00:11:11,067 --> 00:11:15,067
- GO FETCH IT.
YOU PIGS LIKE MUD, DON'TCHA?
284
00:11:15,067 --> 00:11:16,867
- YOU JUST DECLINED
A BREATHALYZER.
285
00:11:16,867 --> 00:11:18,867
I'M GONNA HAVE TO TAKE YOU
DOWNTOWN.
286
00:11:18,867 --> 00:11:21,327
- OKAY, OFFICER. SORRY.
I'M BEING DIFFICULT.
287
00:11:21,333 --> 00:11:24,433
IT'S JUST THAT...I HATE BACON!
[squeals like a pig]
288
00:11:24,433 --> 00:11:28,073
[bleep] PIG!
[tires screech]
289
00:11:28,067 --> 00:11:30,927
[dance music plays]
290
00:11:30,933 --> 00:11:34,273
* *
291
00:11:34,267 --> 00:11:35,967
- REALLY, TURK? HER?
292
00:11:35,967 --> 00:11:37,867
- THAT'S RIGHT.
YOU WANT A SANDWICH?
293
00:11:37,867 --> 00:11:40,427
HOW 'BOUT I FIX YOU
A PEANUT BUTTER AND JEALOUS?
294
00:11:40,433 --> 00:11:41,373
[laughs]
295
00:11:42,867 --> 00:11:46,167
- THAT SHOULD BE ME
GETTING SLAPPED BY BJ.
296
00:11:46,167 --> 00:11:50,827
D-D-D-D-DJ SMART CHOICES
COMING AT YOU
297
00:11:50,833 --> 00:11:53,673
WITH THE FRESHEST BEATS,
RHYMES, AND SAT QUESTIONS.
298
00:11:53,667 --> 00:11:57,197
WE'RE GONNA ROCK OUT
WITH OUR BLANKS OUT.
299
00:11:57,200 --> 00:11:58,400
TAKE OFF YOUR SHOES,
CHILDREN,
300
00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:00,900
BECAUSE THE ANSWER IS SOCKS!
301
00:12:00,900 --> 00:12:04,630
- DANG, LOOK AT ALL THESE
FLAVORS OF BALONEY!
302
00:12:04,633 --> 00:12:08,333
- DON'T JUDGE US.
WE'RE EATING FOR FOUR!
303
00:12:14,933 --> 00:12:18,073
LOOK HOW MANY BALLS
I CAN FIT IN MY MOUTH.
304
00:12:18,067 --> 00:12:20,667
- [nervous chuckle]
OKAY...
305
00:12:20,667 --> 00:12:23,627
HEY, LET'S GO DANCE,
MISTER HEAT ON FEET.
306
00:12:23,633 --> 00:12:25,433
- I CAN'T REALLY DANCE.
307
00:12:25,433 --> 00:12:28,403
BUT WE CAN TAP OUR FEET
AND HUM.
308
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:29,930
- [sighs]
309
00:12:29,933 --> 00:12:32,573
[humming]
310
00:12:32,567 --> 00:12:33,827
- I'M SORRY,
COULD YOU NOT HUM?
311
00:12:33,833 --> 00:12:35,573
IT'S KINDA MAKING ME
NAUSEAS.
312
00:12:35,567 --> 00:12:37,767
* *
313
00:12:37,767 --> 00:12:40,297
- WELL, WELL, WELL,
314
00:12:40,300 --> 00:12:44,300
IF IT ISN'T MR. WADSKA,
ALL BY HIS LONESOME.
315
00:12:44,300 --> 00:12:47,370
- YEAH, WE KNEW YOU WERE LYING
ABOUT HAVING A WOMAN.
316
00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:49,127
- WADSKA, I'M HAVING
SO MUCH FUN.
317
00:12:49,133 --> 00:12:53,073
CAN WE GO DANCE?
OH, OF COURSE,
318
00:12:53,067 --> 00:12:55,067
MILA KUNIS.
319
00:12:55,067 --> 00:12:56,667
TA-TA, GENTLEMEN.
320
00:12:56,667 --> 00:13:00,267
IN THE WORDS OF MY
MENTOR/TORMENTOR TURK,
321
00:13:00,267 --> 00:13:01,397
SUCK IT!
322
00:13:01,400 --> 00:13:04,970
- OH, SHE'S WAY HOTTER
THAN MY DATE.
323
00:13:04,967 --> 00:13:07,367
- [grunting]
ALMOST THERE.
324
00:13:07,367 --> 00:13:10,067
OH, GOD, IT'S NO USE.
325
00:13:10,067 --> 00:13:11,727
I'LL NEVER SQUEEZE
THROUGH THESE BARS.
326
00:13:11,733 --> 00:13:13,103
- WOULD YOU LIKE
A SANDWICH, MA'AM?
327
00:13:13,100 --> 00:13:15,630
WHAT IS IT, A HAM SANDWICH,
PORKY PIG?
328
00:13:15,633 --> 00:13:18,573
- OH, MY GOD. VONEETA?
- DUNCAN.
329
00:13:18,567 --> 00:13:21,227
MY LITTLE PRINCE.
IS THAT REALLY YOU?
330
00:13:21,233 --> 00:13:24,773
- OH, LOSING YOU WAS
MY LIFE'S LARGEST REGRET.
331
00:13:24,767 --> 00:13:26,597
PLEASE, LET ME EXPLAIN.
332
00:13:26,600 --> 00:13:28,270
I WAS ON MY WAY TO MEET YOU
WHEN I WAS HIT
333
00:13:28,267 --> 00:13:29,627
BY A DRUNK DRIVER.
334
00:13:29,633 --> 00:13:33,473
[truck horn honking]
335
00:13:33,467 --> 00:13:36,067
I ENDED UP IN A COMA
FOR 15 YEARS,
336
00:13:36,067 --> 00:13:38,197
AND WHEN I CAME TO,
I DEDICATED MY LIFE
337
00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:41,100
TO PROTECTING CITIZENS FROM
THE SCOURGE OF ALCOHOL ABUSE,
338
00:13:41,100 --> 00:13:43,330
AND BECAME A POLICE OFFICER.
339
00:13:43,333 --> 00:13:45,373
BUT I NEVER STOPPED THINKING
OF YOU.
340
00:13:45,367 --> 00:13:47,227
AND I WOULD LOVE
A SECOND CHANCE.
341
00:13:47,233 --> 00:13:48,633
- FINE.
342
00:13:48,633 --> 00:13:51,303
BUT TRY NOT TO SCREW IT UP
THIS TIME, YOU SELFISH PRICK.
343
00:13:51,300 --> 00:13:57,400
* *
344
00:13:57,400 --> 00:13:59,400
- OOH, YES, SPANK IT AGAIN.
345
00:13:59,400 --> 00:14:01,370
OOH!
[laughs]
346
00:14:01,367 --> 00:14:03,797
- EXCUSE US FOR A SECOND?
347
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:07,200
- DUDE, THIS IS WAY MORE FUN
THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE.
348
00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:09,330
- MAYBE TOO MUCH FUN!
349
00:14:09,333 --> 00:14:12,273
[angry grunts]
350
00:14:12,267 --> 00:14:14,927
- WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
ARE WE BRO DANCING?
351
00:14:14,933 --> 00:14:17,603
- NO, WE'RE FIGHTING.
352
00:14:17,600 --> 00:14:20,170
AND YOU JUST
KICKED MY ASS.
353
00:14:20,167 --> 00:14:23,127
OH, WHO AM I KIDDING?
YOU'RE THE BETTER MAN
354
00:14:23,133 --> 00:14:27,103
WITH YOUR CHISELED GOOD LOOKS
AND PERFECT HAIR.
355
00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:29,400
JUST PROMISE ME
YOU WON'T HURT HER.
356
00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:31,830
- BRO, I'VE BEEN TALKING YOU UP
TO JEENA ALL NIGHT.
357
00:14:31,833 --> 00:14:33,903
- YOU--YOU HAVE?
358
00:14:33,900 --> 00:14:36,730
- YEAH. I'M TOTALLY
GETTING YOU IN THERE, DUDE.
359
00:14:36,733 --> 00:14:39,573
* *
360
00:14:39,567 --> 00:14:41,527
I REQUESTED
THIS LITTLE DITTY.
361
00:14:41,533 --> 00:14:43,073
NOW, GO ASK HER
TO DANCE.
362
00:14:43,067 --> 00:14:44,867
I'LL GO ENTERTAIN DEE-DEE
FOR YOU.
363
00:14:44,867 --> 00:14:46,227
- THANKS, MAN.
364
00:14:49,367 --> 00:14:51,267
HEY, JEENA.
365
00:14:51,267 --> 00:14:52,327
I WAS WONDERING
IF YOU WANTED TO,
366
00:14:52,333 --> 00:14:53,403
IF YOU'RE NOT BUSY...
367
00:14:53,400 --> 00:14:55,930
- MONDO, THIS SONG
IS GONNA END SOON.
368
00:14:55,933 --> 00:14:58,533
* *
369
00:14:58,533 --> 00:14:59,873
CAN I TELL YOU SOMETHING?
370
00:14:59,867 --> 00:15:02,627
ALL NIGHT, I'VE BEEN
WATCHING YOU WITH DEE-DEE,
371
00:15:02,633 --> 00:15:04,933
AND I KNOW
IT SOUNDS WEIRD, BUT...
372
00:15:04,933 --> 00:15:08,103
I FEEL MYSELF GETTING
A LITTLE...JEALOUS.
373
00:15:08,100 --> 00:15:11,670
- ALL I EVER AM IS JEALOUS.
AND HUNGRY SOMETIMES.
374
00:15:11,667 --> 00:15:13,297
BUT MOSTLY JEALOUS.
375
00:15:13,300 --> 00:15:15,930
AND I'M REALLY HAPPY
YOU CAME TONIGHT.
376
00:15:15,933 --> 00:15:16,973
- ME TOO.
377
00:15:16,967 --> 00:15:24,527
* *
378
00:15:24,533 --> 00:15:25,933
- DUDE, IT'S HAPPENING.
379
00:15:25,933 --> 00:15:27,433
- I KNOW.
AND YOU'RE RUINING IT.
380
00:15:27,433 --> 00:15:28,873
- NO, IT'S DEE-DEE!
381
00:15:28,867 --> 00:15:30,427
- OH, HERE IT COMES.
382
00:15:30,433 --> 00:15:32,673
- WHOA!
383
00:15:32,667 --> 00:15:33,797
- BALLS!
384
00:15:37,267 --> 00:15:40,197
- [panting]
DEE-DEE, ARE YOU OKAY?
385
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:42,270
I GOT HERE
AS FAST AS I COULD.
386
00:15:42,267 --> 00:15:44,127
WHY AM I SO OUT OF BREATH?
387
00:15:44,133 --> 00:15:45,933
I RAN FOR, LIKE,
FOUR SECONDS.
388
00:15:45,933 --> 00:15:47,333
- OH, I'M FINE.
389
00:15:47,333 --> 00:15:50,233
I'M JUST DROPPING THE KID OFF
AT THE POOL...FOR REAL!
390
00:15:50,233 --> 00:15:52,073
AAAAAAH!
- OKAY!
391
00:15:52,067 --> 00:15:53,927
OKAY, REMEMBER TO BREATHE.
392
00:15:53,933 --> 00:15:55,973
BREATHE! BREATHE!
- [crying out]
393
00:15:55,967 --> 00:15:59,297
- I'M OUT OF BREATH AGAIN.
I'M IN TERRIBLE SHAPE.
394
00:15:59,300 --> 00:16:02,270
* *
395
00:16:02,267 --> 00:16:04,267
- BE RIGHT BACK, TURK.
396
00:16:04,267 --> 00:16:07,767
I HAVE A LITTLE SURPRISE
FOR YOU.
397
00:16:07,767 --> 00:16:09,397
EVERYONE, STOP TALKING.
398
00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:12,170
I'M SURE YOU ALL REMEMBER,
SIX MONTHS AGO,
399
00:16:12,167 --> 00:16:14,597
TURK PUBLICLY BROKE UP WITH ME
FOR JEENA.
400
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:17,400
I WAS, LIKE,
REALLY EMBARRASSED.
401
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:18,830
BUT NOW THAT TURK AND I
ARE BACK TOGETHER,
402
00:16:18,833 --> 00:16:21,103
I JUST WANT TO SAY...
403
00:16:21,100 --> 00:16:22,600
YOU'RE A LOSER AND A TOOL.
404
00:16:22,600 --> 00:16:23,970
AND YOU HAVE ONE BALL,
AND IT'S GROSS.
405
00:16:23,967 --> 00:16:28,497
YOU JUST GOT DUMPED,
YOU STUPID BITCH!
406
00:16:28,500 --> 00:16:32,070
[laughter]
407
00:16:32,067 --> 00:16:34,427
* *
408
00:16:34,433 --> 00:16:37,433
- OH, SORRY, SIR.
409
00:16:37,433 --> 00:16:40,073
* *
410
00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:41,267
OH, MY GOD.
411
00:16:41,267 --> 00:16:44,267
WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING
AT A HIGH SCHOOL DANCE?
412
00:16:44,267 --> 00:16:46,827
I'M MILA KUNIS!
413
00:16:46,833 --> 00:16:49,503
WHAT'S HAPPENING?
WHERE AM I?
414
00:16:49,500 --> 00:16:50,970
- THERE'S MY GIRL!
415
00:16:50,967 --> 00:16:52,527
- HAVING A BALL?
416
00:16:52,533 --> 00:16:54,773
- ALL RIGHT,
I GUESS I DESERVE THAT.
417
00:16:54,767 --> 00:16:57,597
- YEAH, YOU DO.
BUT MILAN SUCKS.
418
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:59,400
COME ON, I'LL GIVE YOU
A PITY DANCE.
419
00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:01,770
- ALL RIGHT!
OH, YOU SAID PITY.
420
00:17:01,767 --> 00:17:04,067
I THOUGHT YOU SAID TI--
- YEAH, I KNOW.
421
00:17:04,067 --> 00:17:05,667
- PUSH!
- OH, GOD!
422
00:17:05,667 --> 00:17:08,467
- DON'T PUSH ME.
PUSH THE BABY OUT OF YOU.
423
00:17:08,467 --> 00:17:11,527
- I'M SORRY. OKAY, OKAY.
I'M PUSHING!
424
00:17:11,533 --> 00:17:13,973
- I GOT A PAPER TOWEL.
OH...
425
00:17:13,967 --> 00:17:16,167
VERY AMNIOTIC,
VERY UMBILICAL.
426
00:17:16,167 --> 00:17:17,827
I'LL GO GET ONE MORE.
427
00:17:17,833 --> 00:17:19,333
- HERE IT COMES.
428
00:17:19,333 --> 00:17:21,203
- AAAAAAH!
429
00:17:21,200 --> 00:17:22,670
[squlitch]
- BABY!
430
00:17:22,667 --> 00:17:23,667
[baby crying]
431
00:17:23,667 --> 00:17:26,967
YOU'RE A MIRACLE.
432
00:17:26,967 --> 00:17:29,527
A DISGUSTING LITTLE
MIRACLE.
433
00:17:29,533 --> 00:17:32,803
- OH, I'M GONNA NAME HIM
AFTER HIS DADDY...
434
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:36,630
CASA.
CASA MALIBU SPEARS.
435
00:17:36,633 --> 00:17:38,103
- MY BABY BOY!
436
00:17:38,100 --> 00:17:42,700
DEE-DEE, I'VE DECIDED I WANT
TO BE A PART OF HIS LIFE.
437
00:17:42,700 --> 00:17:44,930
- GREAT. ALTHOUGH I WISH
YOU HAD MADE THAT DECISION,
438
00:17:44,933 --> 00:17:46,503
LIKE, THREE MINUTES
EARLIER.
439
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:49,970
- OH. HEY, WOODIE.
440
00:17:49,967 --> 00:17:52,597
TURNS OUT MY DATE HAS
MORE DADDY ISSUES THAN I DO.
441
00:17:52,600 --> 00:17:55,130
- DUDE, THIS IS YOUR CHANCE.
GET IN THERE!
442
00:17:55,133 --> 00:17:59,073
- EXCUSE ME, MISS DANCE,
CAN I HAVE A BJ?
443
00:17:59,067 --> 00:18:02,067
OOPS.
[laughs]
444
00:18:02,067 --> 00:18:04,797
* *
445
00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:08,400
- BALL.
446
00:18:08,400 --> 00:18:11,070
[crying]
447
00:18:11,067 --> 00:18:15,127
- OH, DUNCAN, I'M TREMBLING
JUST BEING HERE WITH YOU.
448
00:18:15,133 --> 00:18:17,373
OH, NO, SCRATCH THAT.
MY SCAMP'S IN NEUTRAL.
449
00:18:17,367 --> 00:18:22,627
- OH, I WILL NEVER
LEAVE YOUR SIDE AGAIN.
450
00:18:22,633 --> 00:18:24,373
IS THAT ALCOHOL?
451
00:18:24,367 --> 00:18:26,697
THOSE KIDS ARE BREAKING
THE LAW!
452
00:18:26,700 --> 00:18:28,370
I'M GONNA HAVE TO
MEET UP WITH YOU LATER,
453
00:18:28,367 --> 00:18:29,567
MY BUTTERBARGE.
454
00:18:29,567 --> 00:18:31,697
- DUNCAN,
IF YOU LEAVE ME NOW,
455
00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:32,900
THERE'S NOT GONNA BE
A LATER.
456
00:18:32,900 --> 00:18:35,270
IT'S THE VADGE
OR THE BADGE.
457
00:18:37,733 --> 00:18:41,703
- I'M SORRY, DUTY CALLS.
458
00:18:41,700 --> 00:18:42,770
UNH!
[thud]
459
00:18:42,767 --> 00:18:45,197
- WADSKA, HELP!
460
00:18:45,200 --> 00:18:47,730
- I HAVE NEVER SEEN THAT WOMAN
BEFORE IN MY LIFE!
461
00:18:47,733 --> 00:18:50,973
HANG ON.
OKAY, TAKE HER AWAY.
462
00:18:50,967 --> 00:18:53,367
- [crying]
463
00:18:53,367 --> 00:18:54,727
- HEY, VONEETA,
I WAS WONDERING--
464
00:18:54,733 --> 00:18:57,633
- SHUT IT, GURNIEL.
I'M GONNA RAW-DOG THAT ASS.
465
00:18:57,633 --> 00:19:00,273
- OH!
466
00:19:00,267 --> 00:19:03,297
- ECCH, MONDO,
WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR TUX?
467
00:19:03,300 --> 00:19:04,770
YOU GET SHOT OR SOMETHING?
468
00:19:04,767 --> 00:19:07,167
- I WISH.
JUST HAD A ROUGH NIGHT.
469
00:19:07,167 --> 00:19:08,497
- [scoffs]
YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE.
470
00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:11,430
I SAW ON TMZ THAT
MILA KUNIS WAS ARRESTED
471
00:19:11,433 --> 00:19:13,733
FOR SUPPLYING MINORS
WITH ALCOHOL.
472
00:19:13,733 --> 00:19:16,703
- NO OFFENSE, MA, I JUST--
I WANNA BE ALONE.
473
00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:18,370
- OKAY. NO PROBLEM.
474
00:19:18,367 --> 00:19:19,927
JEENA'S HERE,
BUT I'LL JUST TELL HER
475
00:19:19,933 --> 00:19:21,203
YOU'LL TALK TO HER TOMORROW.
476
00:19:21,200 --> 00:19:26,130
- I CAN TALK NOW!
TELL JEENA I CAN TALK NOW!
477
00:19:26,133 --> 00:19:27,173
- [laughing]
478
00:19:32,900 --> 00:19:35,770
SO WHERE'D YOU RUN OFF TO?
479
00:19:35,767 --> 00:19:37,897
- I JUST FIGURED YOU WERE
GOING HOME WITH TURK.
480
00:19:37,900 --> 00:19:40,730
- NO. I WAS JUST
GIVING HIM A PITY DANCE.
481
00:19:40,733 --> 00:19:42,233
- EVEN WORSE!
482
00:19:42,233 --> 00:19:44,433
OH, YOU SAID PITY.
483
00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:47,433
- GOD, DO I HAVE A SPEECH
IMPEDIMENT OR SOMETHING?
484
00:19:47,433 --> 00:19:51,103
MONDO, I WAS ACTUALLY THINKING
ABOUT YOU ALL NIGHT.
485
00:19:51,100 --> 00:19:52,170
- REALLY?
486
00:19:52,167 --> 00:19:54,067
BECAUSE I THINK
ABOUT YOU CONSTANTLY.
487
00:19:54,067 --> 00:19:56,227
NOT LIKE A STALKER,
MORE LIKE AN OBSESSIVE FAN
488
00:19:56,233 --> 00:19:57,703
WHO JUST WANTS
TO SMELL YOUR HAIR.
489
00:19:57,700 --> 00:19:59,870
ALL RIGHT, THAT SOUNDED
A LITTLE CREEPY.
490
00:19:59,867 --> 00:20:01,497
WHAT I'M TRYING TO SAY IS--
491
00:20:01,500 --> 00:20:06,370
MMM...
492
00:20:06,367 --> 00:20:08,267
- SORRY, I INTERRUPTED.
493
00:20:08,267 --> 00:20:09,297
YOU WERE SAYING?
494
00:20:09,300 --> 00:20:12,030
- NOTHING I SAY MATTERS.
495
00:20:15,300 --> 00:20:16,970
- AND THEN SHE JUST
KISSED YOU?
496
00:20:16,967 --> 00:20:20,197
VERY COOL.
VERY COMING-OF-AGE-ICAL.
497
00:20:20,200 --> 00:20:21,530
- I KNOW, RIGHT?
498
00:20:21,533 --> 00:20:22,603
HOW'D IT GO WITH YOU?
499
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:24,570
- HJ WAS AWESOME.
500
00:20:24,567 --> 00:20:26,297
- I THOUGHT YOU ENDED UP
WITH BJ.
501
00:20:26,300 --> 00:20:27,930
- I DID.
502
00:20:27,933 --> 00:20:29,903
- WOODIE, REMEMBER
ALL THOSE TIMES
503
00:20:29,900 --> 00:20:31,900
I WAS DEPRESSED
ABOUT LEAVING JERSEY
504
00:20:31,900 --> 00:20:33,670
AND MOVING
TO PLAYA DEL TORO?
505
00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:35,967
- YEAH.
- WELL, FORGET IT.
506
00:20:35,967 --> 00:20:37,667
I LOVE IT HERE!
507
00:20:37,667 --> 00:20:40,897
both: BOOSTAMOOCHA!
508
00:20:40,947 --> 00:20:45,497
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0
36198
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.