All language subtitles for Good Vibes s01e07 The Grass is Always Greener.eng

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,633 --> 00:00:08,433 - JEENA. [bikini snaps] 2 00:00:08,533 --> 00:00:10,003 HANG ON A SECOND, MAN, 3 00:00:10,100 --> 00:00:11,200 I'VE GOT TO LOWER THE FLAG. 4 00:00:11,300 --> 00:00:12,700 - THINK ABOUT BASEBALL. 5 00:00:14,967 --> 00:00:16,297 - NOPE. - DEAD PUPPIES. 6 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:20,230 - IT'S NOT WORKING! 7 00:00:20,333 --> 00:00:22,533 - OKAY, THIS CALLS FOR DRASTIC MEASURES. 8 00:00:22,633 --> 00:00:25,703 [whispers indistinctly] - WHAT? OH, OH, "D" LIST! 9 00:00:28,367 --> 00:00:30,367 - SOMEHOW IT GOT EVEN HARDER. 10 00:00:30,467 --> 00:00:32,767 - HELLO, MY SURFING MANATEE! 11 00:00:32,867 --> 00:00:34,167 - HI, MOM! 12 00:00:34,267 --> 00:00:36,297 OKAY, THAT DID IT. LET'S GO IN. 13 00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:39,670 - UH, NOW I'M GOING TO NEED A MINUTE, DUDE. 14 00:00:39,767 --> 00:00:42,667 [upbeat music] 15 00:00:42,767 --> 00:00:50,697 * 16 00:01:05,133 --> 00:01:06,573 - READY TO RINSE, MA! 17 00:01:06,667 --> 00:01:08,667 - SHUTTING IT DOWN, KIDDO! 18 00:01:10,100 --> 00:01:11,170 - TOWEL ME! 19 00:01:11,267 --> 00:01:14,597 - INCOMING! 20 00:01:14,700 --> 00:01:17,830 TART'S UP! CLEARED FOR THE HAIR DRYER! 21 00:01:19,867 --> 00:01:22,497 [plop] - SWISH. FLUSHING! 22 00:01:24,167 --> 00:01:25,767 - OH, CRAP. [explosion] 23 00:01:25,867 --> 00:01:27,567 - OH, GOD, NO! 24 00:01:27,667 --> 00:01:30,227 RINSING AGAIN. 25 00:01:30,333 --> 00:01:33,873 - HAVE A GREAT DAY, MY LITTLE TICKLE MONSTER. 26 00:01:33,967 --> 00:01:35,627 OH, TICKLE, TICKLE, TICKLE! - [laughs] OKAY. 27 00:01:35,733 --> 00:01:38,073 OKAY, I GOT TO GO. 28 00:01:38,100 --> 00:01:40,230 - GOOD MORNING, MY LITTLE TICKLE MONSTER. 29 00:01:40,333 --> 00:01:41,433 - JUST DRIVE, DUDE. 30 00:01:41,533 --> 00:01:43,073 [laughs] 31 00:01:43,167 --> 00:01:45,397 [car horn cacophony] - [sighs] 32 00:01:45,500 --> 00:01:46,600 THIS SUCKS! 33 00:01:46,700 --> 00:01:48,330 WHAT THE HELL'S GOING ON TODAY? 34 00:01:48,433 --> 00:01:49,503 - MY SISTER'S TAPING 35 00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:52,400 HER STUPID SWEET 16 REALITY SHOW FOR MTV. 36 00:01:52,500 --> 00:01:54,070 - HEY, HOW COME YOU'RE NEVER ON HER SHOW? 37 00:01:54,133 --> 00:01:56,233 - I HAVE MY REASONS. 38 00:02:00,067 --> 00:02:01,167 - NO RUSH, KID. 39 00:02:01,267 --> 00:02:03,067 WE'RE ON OVERTIME. 40 00:02:03,133 --> 00:02:06,073 [upbeat rock music plays] 41 00:02:06,133 --> 00:02:07,303 * 42 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:08,770 - I'M MILAN. 43 00:02:08,867 --> 00:02:11,067 MY DADDY'S BILLIONAIRE BROCK STONE. 44 00:02:11,100 --> 00:02:13,670 YOU MIGHT KNOW ME FROM MY TWEEN IMPLANTS, 45 00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:16,297 OR VH1's A HUNDRED REASONS NOT TO HAVE KIDS. 46 00:02:16,400 --> 00:02:18,270 MY HOBBIES INCLUDE STAYING IN SHAPE... 47 00:02:18,367 --> 00:02:19,267 [retches] 48 00:02:19,367 --> 00:02:22,367 AND MAKING THINGS HORNY. 49 00:02:22,467 --> 00:02:23,697 JOIN ME THIS WEEK, 50 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:26,300 AS WE LEAD UP TO THE BEST SUPER, SWEET 16 EVER. 51 00:02:26,400 --> 00:02:30,270 TODAY, I ASK YOU, AMERICA, TO HELP ME PICK MY DREAM DATE 52 00:02:30,367 --> 00:02:34,497 FOR THE BIGGEST NIGHT OF MY-- AND YOUR--LIVES. 53 00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:37,700 - CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW EXCITED PEOPLE GET FOR THIS NONSENSE? 54 00:02:37,800 --> 00:02:38,870 MONDO? 55 00:02:38,967 --> 00:02:40,327 - I'M SO EXCITED! 56 00:02:40,433 --> 00:02:41,533 - [over P.A.] LET'S GIVE A HAND 57 00:02:41,633 --> 00:02:43,073 FOR PLAYA DEL TORO'S HOMEGROWN HOTTIE-- 58 00:02:43,100 --> 00:02:45,670 A GIRL WHO'S GOT MORE PLASTIC IN HER, 59 00:02:45,767 --> 00:02:47,297 THAN ME ON NEW DILDO DAY, 60 00:02:47,400 --> 00:02:49,070 MILAN STONE. 61 00:02:49,100 --> 00:02:51,870 AND NOW, LET'S MEET OUR CELEBRITY BEEFCAKES. 62 00:02:51,967 --> 00:02:55,327 JOHN MAYER--YOU KNOW HIM FROM HATING HIS GUTS. 63 00:02:55,433 --> 00:02:58,633 RYAN CABRERA-- FROM...FROM-- 64 00:02:58,733 --> 00:03:00,173 YEAH, YOU PROBABLY DON'T KNOW WHO HE IS. 65 00:03:00,267 --> 00:03:02,797 AND FINALLY, MULTIPLE GOLD MEDALIST, 66 00:03:02,900 --> 00:03:05,770 THE FLYING TOMATO HIMSELF, CARROT TOP. 67 00:03:05,867 --> 00:03:07,067 TEXT YOUR VOTE NOW 68 00:03:07,133 --> 00:03:10,173 TO DECIDE WHICH OF THESE TENDER MORSELS OF MAN-FLESH 69 00:03:10,267 --> 00:03:12,967 WILL BE MILAN'S SWEET 16 DATE. 70 00:03:13,067 --> 00:03:14,067 [chime rings] 71 00:03:14,133 --> 00:03:15,073 [keys tapping] 72 00:03:15,133 --> 00:03:16,233 [electronic trilling] 73 00:03:16,333 --> 00:03:18,403 - [grunting] 74 00:03:22,067 --> 00:03:24,397 [sighs] LONNIE? 75 00:03:24,500 --> 00:03:25,970 WHAT ARE YOU DOING UP HERE? 76 00:03:26,067 --> 00:03:28,167 - STEALING BOLTS. - [screams] 77 00:03:28,267 --> 00:03:30,767 - MAN, THAT KID IS FALLING FAST! 78 00:03:30,867 --> 00:03:32,197 - [screams] 79 00:03:32,300 --> 00:03:33,500 [cheers and applause] 80 00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:35,370 - WHAT THE [bleep] DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING, 81 00:03:35,467 --> 00:03:36,567 YOU STUPID FAT PEASANT? 82 00:03:36,667 --> 00:03:39,267 - SORRY, EVERYBODY, SORRY. 83 00:03:39,367 --> 00:03:40,467 - YOU IDIOT! 84 00:03:40,567 --> 00:03:42,127 THE DAY I TAKE YOU TO MY PARTY, 85 00:03:42,233 --> 00:03:44,373 IS THE DAY I GO DOWN ON EVERY GUY IN THE SCHOOL. 86 00:03:44,467 --> 00:03:47,067 [keys tapping, chime ringing] 87 00:03:47,100 --> 00:03:48,730 [cheering] 88 00:03:48,833 --> 00:03:50,533 - NO! 89 00:03:50,633 --> 00:03:52,073 - NO! 90 00:03:52,133 --> 00:03:54,533 - NO! - TEETS OUT. 91 00:03:54,633 --> 00:03:56,273 - NO MOTHER-EFFING WAY. 92 00:03:56,367 --> 00:03:59,867 I AM MILAN STONE--MY FARTS ARE OTHER GIRLS' DREAMS, OKAY? 93 00:04:00,067 --> 00:04:02,867 I AM PERFECT, AND I DESERVE PERFECT. 94 00:04:02,967 --> 00:04:04,267 - OH, PERFECT IS SO LAST SEASON. 95 00:04:04,367 --> 00:04:06,297 IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE ME, JUST CHECK PEREZ HILTON. 96 00:04:08,733 --> 00:04:10,633 - YOU SUITS ARE COMPROMISING MY VISION. 97 00:04:10,733 --> 00:04:11,973 - WELL, FINE. IF YOU'RE NOT INTERESTED, 98 00:04:12,067 --> 00:04:13,267 WE'VE GOT A GIRL IN COLORADO 99 00:04:13,367 --> 00:04:15,367 WHO'S CHOMPING AT THE BIT TO TAKE AN ETHNIC LEPER 100 00:04:15,467 --> 00:04:16,467 TO HER QUINCEANERA. 101 00:04:16,567 --> 00:04:17,727 - THAT WHORE! 102 00:04:17,833 --> 00:04:20,073 OKAY, I'LL DO IT. 103 00:04:20,167 --> 00:04:22,427 - HEY, GUYS, IT'S THE STUPID FAT PEASANT! 104 00:04:22,533 --> 00:04:24,173 - OH, MY GOD. THERE HE IS. 105 00:04:24,267 --> 00:04:27,497 - DID YOU SEE THAT, WOODIE? I'VE GOT A GROUPIE! 106 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:30,300 I'VE GOT HEAT! I'M A FLASH IN THE PAN! 107 00:04:30,400 --> 00:04:32,070 - WHAT ABOUT JEENA? - I THINK IT'S TIME 108 00:04:32,167 --> 00:04:34,367 YOU FINALLY FACED REALITY, MOONBEAM. 109 00:04:34,467 --> 00:04:35,797 SHE'S WITH TURK. 110 00:04:35,900 --> 00:04:37,070 - I'M THINKING ABOUT 111 00:04:37,100 --> 00:04:39,630 TRADING THIS BABY IN FOR A MOTORBOAT. 112 00:04:39,733 --> 00:04:41,473 [imitates cycle engine] - [giggles] 113 00:04:41,567 --> 00:04:43,067 - SEE? THAT WOULD HAVE SENT OLD MONDO 114 00:04:43,133 --> 00:04:45,333 INTO A SPIRAL OF HURT AND MASTURBATORY ANGER. 115 00:04:45,433 --> 00:04:47,773 BUT NEW MONDO'S A REALITY STAR, AND DOESN'T HAVE TO BOTHER 116 00:04:47,867 --> 00:04:49,197 WITH ORDINARY FEELINGS. 117 00:04:49,300 --> 00:04:50,500 - I DON'T KNOW, MAN. 118 00:04:50,600 --> 00:04:52,230 - I SEE WHAT THIS IS ABOUT. 119 00:04:52,333 --> 00:04:54,803 ARE YOU WEIRDED OUT BY ME DATING YOUR SISTER? 120 00:04:54,900 --> 00:04:56,070 - NO, I'M COOL WITH IT. 121 00:04:56,100 --> 00:04:58,400 JUST BE A LITTLE, YOU KNOW, CAUTIOUS. 122 00:04:58,500 --> 00:05:01,630 - OH, CONDOMS. WAY AHEAD OF YOU. 123 00:05:01,733 --> 00:05:03,473 - THAT'S KETCHUP. - OH, RIGHT. 124 00:05:03,567 --> 00:05:05,427 CONDOM POCKET, CONDIMENT POCKET-- 125 00:05:05,533 --> 00:05:06,803 I ALWAYS GET THOSE MIXED UP. 126 00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:09,400 THAT WOULD EXPLAIN WHY MY HAMBURGER WAS SO RUBBERY. 127 00:05:09,500 --> 00:05:10,630 - JUST PROMISE ME 128 00:05:10,733 --> 00:05:12,203 YOU WON'T GET TOO CARRIED AWAY WITH EVERYTHING. 129 00:05:12,300 --> 00:05:13,470 - YOU KIDDING ME, MAN? I'M TOTALLY, 130 00:05:13,567 --> 00:05:16,127 100% COMPLETELY GROUNDED. 131 00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:18,673 OH, MY GOD! IS THAT MY HELICOPTER? 132 00:05:18,767 --> 00:05:21,967 - * I GOT FRIENDS, I GOT MONEY, I GOT CARS-- * 133 00:05:22,067 --> 00:05:25,227 - TIME FOR MY INVITATION, BITCHES! 134 00:05:25,333 --> 00:05:29,633 FIRST ONE GOES TO MY EVERYMAN UNDERDOG DATE... 135 00:05:30,900 --> 00:05:32,730 MONDO! 136 00:05:32,833 --> 00:05:35,433 - REALLY? - OF COURSE, SILLY. 137 00:05:35,533 --> 00:05:37,333 NOW EVERYONE CAN SEE THAT I TOTALLY DON'T CARE 138 00:05:37,433 --> 00:05:38,733 ABOUT LOOKS OR MONEY... 139 00:05:38,833 --> 00:05:40,533 OR BODY ODOR. 140 00:05:40,633 --> 00:05:42,473 - I TAKE A PILL FOR THAT NOW. 141 00:05:42,567 --> 00:05:44,467 - UGH! - HEY, WADSKA. 142 00:05:44,567 --> 00:05:49,267 - CAN YOU BELIEVE THIS GROSS DISPLAY OF DECADENCE? 143 00:05:49,367 --> 00:05:50,727 OH! FOR ME? 144 00:05:50,833 --> 00:05:52,703 OH, WHATEVER SHALL I WEAR? AH! 145 00:05:52,800 --> 00:05:54,500 "YOU ARE REQUIRED BY LAW 146 00:05:54,600 --> 00:05:56,530 TO STAY AT LEAST 50 YARDS AWAY FROM"-- 147 00:05:56,633 --> 00:05:59,503 THIS IS A RESTRAINING ORDER! 148 00:05:59,600 --> 00:06:01,070 - ISN'T SHE CREATIVE? 149 00:06:03,933 --> 00:06:05,073 - UGH! 150 00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:09,770 - THIS...IS...WAR, BITCHES! 151 00:06:12,667 --> 00:06:14,197 - OH, WOW. 152 00:06:14,300 --> 00:06:15,670 THIS IS PERFECT. - FOR WHAT? 153 00:06:15,767 --> 00:06:18,227 - I WANT TO GIVE IT TO MILAN FOR HER BIRTHDAY. 154 00:06:18,333 --> 00:06:20,073 WHEN WE WERE KIDS, WE USED TO COLLECT SHELLS. 155 00:06:20,133 --> 00:06:21,933 - REALLY? MILAN DID THAT? 156 00:06:22,067 --> 00:06:24,127 - YEAH, SHE WAS WAY INTO NATURE. 157 00:06:24,233 --> 00:06:25,503 WE WERE INSEPARABLE. 158 00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:27,630 MILAN, WHAT DID YOU GET? 159 00:06:27,733 --> 00:06:29,333 - HEY, WOODSTER, 160 00:06:29,433 --> 00:06:30,933 I FOUND A CONCH SHELL. 161 00:06:31,067 --> 00:06:33,227 YOU WANT TO HEAR THE MAGIC OCEAN INSIDE? 162 00:06:33,333 --> 00:06:35,633 - AW, HOW ABOUT A PICTURE? 163 00:06:35,733 --> 00:06:37,703 - THANKS, LONNIE. 164 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:39,700 - WOW, THAT'S A REALLY THOUGHTFUL GIFT. 165 00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,400 [cell phone chimes] UH, I GOT TO GO MEET MILAN 166 00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:44,530 AT YOUR REAL HOUSE, DUDE. 167 00:06:44,633 --> 00:06:46,673 HEY, WHY HAVEN'T YOU EVER TAKEN ME UP THERE? 168 00:06:46,767 --> 00:06:48,897 - I FEEL MORE COMFORTABLE OUT HERE. 169 00:06:49,067 --> 00:06:51,567 ALL THE MATERIAL STUFF GIVES ME THE HEEBIE-JEEBIES. 170 00:06:51,667 --> 00:06:53,727 YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? MONDO? 171 00:06:53,833 --> 00:06:55,573 - [shrieking with glee] 172 00:06:55,667 --> 00:06:56,697 [doorbell chimes] 173 00:06:56,800 --> 00:06:58,230 - OH, LOOK. 174 00:06:58,333 --> 00:07:00,073 IT'S THE CHUBBY RELATABLE DATE 175 00:07:00,167 --> 00:07:03,067 THAT YOU GUYS SO AWESOMELY PICKED FOR ME. 176 00:07:03,100 --> 00:07:05,670 OH, COME ON IN. I'LL SHOW YOU THE HOUSE. 177 00:07:05,767 --> 00:07:07,327 LOOK, COULD YOU JUST TRY NOT TO EMBARRASS ME? 178 00:07:07,433 --> 00:07:10,133 - BABE, I WOULD NEVER EMBARRASS YOU. 179 00:07:10,233 --> 00:07:11,573 IS THAT A VAGINA? 180 00:07:11,667 --> 00:07:14,767 - NO, IT'S A GEORGIA O'KEEFFE. 181 00:07:14,867 --> 00:07:16,967 - HEY, I DON'T CARE WHOSE VAGINA IT IS-- 182 00:07:17,067 --> 00:07:18,927 IT'S AS PRETTY AS A ROSE. 183 00:07:19,067 --> 00:07:21,267 - IT IS A ROSE. - EXACTLY. 184 00:07:21,367 --> 00:07:23,467 - [titters] UH, COME ON, GUYS. 185 00:07:23,567 --> 00:07:25,967 LET ME SHOW YOU THE REST OF THE HOUSE. 186 00:07:26,067 --> 00:07:28,967 [upbeat rock music] 187 00:07:29,067 --> 00:07:30,167 * 188 00:07:30,267 --> 00:07:33,667 THIS IS MY 4-D SCREENING ROOM. [heroic music] 189 00:07:33,767 --> 00:07:35,067 - OW! 190 00:07:35,100 --> 00:07:37,070 - THIS IS MY DOG FITNESS CENTER-- 191 00:07:37,167 --> 00:07:39,697 COMPLETE WITH SHIH TZU SHIATSU. 192 00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:41,830 [sighs] MY CHANDELIER IS FROM PARIS. 193 00:07:41,933 --> 00:07:43,333 MY RUG IS FROM THE ORIENT. 194 00:07:43,433 --> 00:07:46,173 AND MY SISTER, WE PICKED UP FROM AFRICA. 195 00:07:46,267 --> 00:07:47,727 * 196 00:07:47,833 --> 00:07:50,373 AND HERE ARE MY AWESOME PARENTS, BETHENNY AND BROCK. 197 00:07:50,467 --> 00:07:52,967 - WOW! YOU HAVE A DAD TOO? 198 00:07:53,067 --> 00:07:55,867 - AND OVER HERE IS CHEF RAMSAY. 199 00:07:55,967 --> 00:07:57,067 - [bleep] OFF! 200 00:07:57,133 --> 00:07:58,833 - ISN'T HE THE BEST? 201 00:07:58,933 --> 00:08:00,903 HE MAKES ALL MY FAVORITE AFTER-SCHOOL SNACKS 202 00:08:01,067 --> 00:08:03,067 THAT I EAT AND THEN UNSWALLOW. 203 00:08:03,133 --> 00:08:04,873 AND THAT ABOUT WRAPS IT. 204 00:08:04,967 --> 00:08:07,227 THANKS FOR COMING BY MY HOUSE, GUYS. 205 00:08:07,333 --> 00:08:08,403 NOW GET OUT OF HERE, 206 00:08:08,500 --> 00:08:11,570 'CAUSE WE'RE TOTALLY GOING TO DO IT. 207 00:08:11,667 --> 00:08:14,467 - AND CUT! 208 00:08:14,567 --> 00:08:17,267 - SO, UH, I GUESS WE'LL TOTALLY DO IT LATER? 209 00:08:17,367 --> 00:08:18,927 - READY TO HIT THE WAVES, MAN? 210 00:08:19,067 --> 00:08:20,327 - OH, OKAY. 211 00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:22,073 - BUT WOODFORD, YOUR FRIEND HASN'T SEEN 212 00:08:22,167 --> 00:08:23,497 THE REST OF THE HOUSE YET. 213 00:08:23,600 --> 00:08:26,800 YOU KNOW HOW I LIKE TO SHOW OFF MY OBSCENE WEALTH. 214 00:08:26,900 --> 00:08:29,470 - I'M SURE HE'D RATHER BE OUT ON THE SURF. 215 00:08:29,567 --> 00:08:31,727 RIGHT, MONDO? - YEAH, I-I GUESS. 216 00:08:31,833 --> 00:08:33,373 - BUT ALL OF THE BATHROOMS 217 00:08:33,467 --> 00:08:35,367 IN THE EASTERN WING HAVE BIDETS. 218 00:08:35,467 --> 00:08:38,067 AND ALL THE BIDETS HAVE REMOTE CONTROLS. 219 00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:41,200 - COME ON, MONDO. THE WAVES--NATURE'S BIDET. 220 00:08:41,300 --> 00:08:43,570 - I'LL GO SURFING TOMORROW. I PROMISE. 221 00:08:47,167 --> 00:08:49,567 WOW. 222 00:08:49,667 --> 00:08:51,527 - I'LL GIVE YOU SOME TIME ALONE. 223 00:08:51,633 --> 00:08:53,703 - WHOO! [laughs] 224 00:08:55,933 --> 00:08:59,103 HUH? OH! 225 00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:01,770 MMM. [blubbers] 226 00:09:01,867 --> 00:09:03,927 OOH. - NO RUSH KID. 227 00:09:04,067 --> 00:09:05,097 WE'RE ON OVERTIME. 228 00:09:07,833 --> 00:09:09,633 - YOU GETTING THIS, BOYS? 229 00:09:12,767 --> 00:09:14,567 - OH, MONDO, HONEY, 230 00:09:14,667 --> 00:09:16,127 YOU SCARED ME HALF TO DEATH. 231 00:09:16,233 --> 00:09:18,803 WHAT'S WITH THE HAIR? - IT'S THE "BIEBER". 232 00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:20,300 - OH, THANK GOD. 233 00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:22,600 I THOUGHT YOU WERE SOME KIND OF LESBIAN INTRUDER. 234 00:09:22,700 --> 00:09:24,200 - NO, MA, I GOT A MAKEOVER. 235 00:09:24,300 --> 00:09:25,670 I'M TAKING THE RICHEST GIRL IN TOWN 236 00:09:25,767 --> 00:09:27,297 TO THE BIGGEST PARTY OF THE YEAR. LOOK! 237 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:30,930 [static, banging] - MONDO, SETTLE DOWN. 238 00:09:31,067 --> 00:09:32,467 I WAS A LITTLE LATE PAYING THE BILL. 239 00:09:32,567 --> 00:09:33,967 I'M SORRY. HERE, HAVE SOME DIN-DIN. 240 00:09:34,067 --> 00:09:37,067 - GREAT, ANOTHER SENT-BACK SPECIAL. 241 00:09:37,167 --> 00:09:38,567 - WHAT? IT'S BARELY BEEN TOUCHED. 242 00:09:38,667 --> 00:09:40,867 AND THE CUSTOMER HAD A VERY CLEAN MOUTH. 243 00:09:42,733 --> 00:09:44,203 - WHAT HAPPENED TO MY DOOR? 244 00:09:44,300 --> 00:09:46,230 - OH, IT FELL OFF THE HINGES, 245 00:09:46,333 --> 00:09:47,603 SO I HUNG UP A BEADED CURTAIN. 246 00:09:47,700 --> 00:09:48,870 PRETTY GROOVY, HUH? 247 00:09:48,967 --> 00:09:50,067 I'LL GET IT FIXED AFTER PAYDAY. 248 00:09:50,167 --> 00:09:51,667 - AND WHEN IS THAT EXACTLY? 249 00:09:51,767 --> 00:09:53,767 - EXCUSE ME? COME ON, KIDDO. 250 00:09:53,867 --> 00:09:56,067 YOU KNOW I BUST MY TAIL TO GET US EVERYTHING WE NEED. 251 00:09:56,167 --> 00:09:57,897 - GIVE ME A BREAK, MA. OUR HOUSE IS FALLING APART, 252 00:09:58,067 --> 00:10:01,867 AND ALL WE EAT ARE LEFTOVERS THAT OTHER PEOPLE LEFT OVER. 253 00:10:01,967 --> 00:10:04,797 I NEVER REALIZED HOW MUCH IT SUCKS BEING POOR. 254 00:10:04,900 --> 00:10:06,900 - POOR? YOU DON'T KNOW POOR. 255 00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:08,100 YOU'VE GOT A ROOF OVER YOUR HEAD, 256 00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:09,600 A BLOCK FROM THE BEACH. 257 00:10:09,700 --> 00:10:12,000 YOU'VE GOT A VIDEO GAME FOR YOUR "PLAY-BOX" AND "WEE-WEE." 258 00:10:12,100 --> 00:10:14,570 AND YOU'RE NOT EXACTLY WASTING AWAY OVER THERE. 259 00:10:14,667 --> 00:10:15,897 WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO YOU? 260 00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:19,070 - EXPENSIVE WATER SHOT FROM AN EXPENSIVE TOILET! 261 00:10:19,167 --> 00:10:22,497 THAT'S WHAT'S GOTTEN INTO ME! [beads jingle] 262 00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:26,230 THESE THINGS ARE REALLY HARD TO SLAM! 263 00:10:31,100 --> 00:10:32,700 [tires squeal] 264 00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:34,670 - TOO LATE, YOU JUST MISSED HIS LIMO. 265 00:10:34,767 --> 00:10:36,827 - [sighs] WOODIE, YOU LIKE LEFTOVERS? 266 00:10:36,933 --> 00:10:38,233 - THANKS, BABS. 267 00:10:38,333 --> 00:10:39,873 - SOMETHING WRONG, HONEY? 268 00:10:39,967 --> 00:10:41,497 - I THINK MONDO'S GETTING CAUGHT UP 269 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:43,030 IN THIS MONEY STUFF. 270 00:10:43,133 --> 00:10:44,603 I'M NOT SURE WHETHER TO WARN HIM 271 00:10:44,700 --> 00:10:46,430 OR JUST LET HIM FIGURE IT OUT HIMSELF. 272 00:10:46,533 --> 00:10:48,733 - AS HIS MOM, I GO THROUGH THAT EVERY DAY. 273 00:10:48,833 --> 00:10:50,873 YOU KNOW, YOU'D MAKE A GREAT DAD, WOODIE. 274 00:10:50,967 --> 00:10:53,227 - [internal] IS SHE TRYING TO TELL ME SOMETHING? 275 00:10:53,333 --> 00:10:56,033 SHE THINKS I'D MAKE A GREAT DAD TO MONDO, 276 00:10:56,133 --> 00:11:01,073 ERGO SHE THINKS I WOULD BE A GREAT HUSBAND TO HER? 277 00:11:01,100 --> 00:11:02,730 I THINK SHE JUST PROPOSED. 278 00:11:02,833 --> 00:11:05,733 I DO. BABS? 279 00:11:07,100 --> 00:11:09,900 [hip-hop music plays] - WOW, MONDO. 280 00:11:10,067 --> 00:11:13,127 YOU LOOK LIKE A JEWEL THIEF. - ISN'T IT GREAT? 281 00:11:13,233 --> 00:11:14,403 YOU'RE GOING TO MY PARTY, RIGHT? 282 00:11:14,500 --> 00:11:16,230 - OH, MILAN'S? YEAH. I WOULDN'T MISS IT. 283 00:11:16,333 --> 00:11:19,103 HOW'S IT GOING WITH YOU TWO? 284 00:11:19,200 --> 00:11:20,500 - OH, GREAT. WE HAVE A CLASSIC BANTER, 285 00:11:20,600 --> 00:11:21,800 LIKE PATTINSON AND STEWART. 286 00:11:21,900 --> 00:11:23,770 THERE'S MY BETTER HALF. 287 00:11:23,867 --> 00:11:26,097 - YEAH, THE DAY I'M HALF OF YOU, I'LL KILL MYSELF. 288 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:29,200 - [hysterical laugh] ZING, DARLING. ZING! 289 00:11:29,300 --> 00:11:31,570 UNDENIABLE CHEMISTRY. 290 00:11:31,667 --> 00:11:33,697 - MONDO, PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS THE WRONG WAY, 291 00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,130 BUT I THINK YOU DESERVE BETTER. 292 00:11:36,233 --> 00:11:39,073 - YOU GOT TO CUT BACK ON THE FRO-YO, BABE. 293 00:11:39,100 --> 00:11:41,870 YOU'RE GOING TO BLOW MY SHOCKS. [laughs] 294 00:11:41,967 --> 00:11:45,367 - MAYBE YOU DESERVE BETTER TOO. 295 00:11:45,467 --> 00:11:47,497 - PSST! PSST! 296 00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:50,370 THE SALAMANDER IS LATE TO HIS OWN EXECUTION. 297 00:11:50,467 --> 00:11:51,497 - HUH? 298 00:11:51,600 --> 00:11:53,830 - THE CORNISH HEN IS EXPECTING GUESTS. 299 00:11:53,933 --> 00:11:55,073 - WHAT? 300 00:11:55,100 --> 00:11:58,100 - UGH! HOW MUCH CLEARER DO I HAVE TO MAKE THIS? 301 00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:01,470 TOGETHER WE WILL SABOTAGE MILAN'S PARTY, 302 00:12:01,567 --> 00:12:04,367 AND TOPPLE HER FASHIONISTA REGIME! 303 00:12:04,467 --> 00:12:06,367 [maniacal laughter] 304 00:12:06,467 --> 00:12:09,367 OH, IT FEELS SO GOOD HAVING A MAN ON THE INSIDE. 305 00:12:09,467 --> 00:12:12,227 - WADSKA, I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 306 00:12:12,333 --> 00:12:15,173 - OH, I SEE. YOU CAN'T TALK RIGHT NOW. 307 00:12:15,267 --> 00:12:17,697 [gasps] THEY'RE LISTENING, AREN'T THEY? 308 00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:19,270 HIT ME! MAKE IT LOOK REAL. 309 00:12:19,367 --> 00:12:21,597 NO TIME! 310 00:12:22,967 --> 00:12:25,467 - DUDE, THERE YOU ARE. 311 00:12:25,567 --> 00:12:27,197 IT'S MY BIG NIGHT. 312 00:12:27,300 --> 00:12:29,770 HOW DO I LOOK? - LIKE A MILLION BUCKS. 313 00:12:29,867 --> 00:12:31,197 - ARE YOU MAD AT ME? 314 00:12:31,300 --> 00:12:32,770 - WE HAVEN'T HUNG OUT ALL WEEK. 315 00:12:32,867 --> 00:12:34,797 DON'T YOU THINK YOU'VE BEEN ACTING A LITTLE STRANGE? 316 00:12:34,900 --> 00:12:36,600 - I'VE BEEN ACTING STRANGE? OH! 317 00:12:36,700 --> 00:12:38,730 YOU'VE GOT THIS AMAZING FAMILY, 318 00:12:38,833 --> 00:12:41,073 ALL THE STUFF YOU COULD EVER WANT, 319 00:12:41,133 --> 00:12:43,173 AND YOU'RE LIVING OUT HERE IN A DOGHOUSE. 320 00:12:44,600 --> 00:12:46,530 - COME ON, I WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING. 321 00:12:46,633 --> 00:12:49,073 - WHOA, THIS IS YOUR ROOM? 322 00:12:49,100 --> 00:12:50,400 - NO, THIS IS A SHRINE 323 00:12:50,500 --> 00:12:52,600 TO A KID THAT MY PARENTS WANTED ME TO BE. 324 00:12:52,700 --> 00:12:54,600 - IT SAYS HERE, YOU TOOK HOME THE BRONZE METAL 325 00:12:54,700 --> 00:12:56,600 FOR BOBSLEDDING IN 2006. 326 00:12:56,700 --> 00:12:57,930 - THOSE ARE FROM EBAY. 327 00:12:58,067 --> 00:12:59,227 - HMM. I WONDER HOW MUCH THEY PAID 328 00:12:59,333 --> 00:13:01,633 FOR THIS LAME POKEMON TOURNAMENT PARTICIPANT RIBBON. 329 00:13:01,733 --> 00:13:03,933 - NO, THAT'S MINE. 330 00:13:04,067 --> 00:13:06,497 COME LOOK AT THIS PHOTO. THIS WAS THE ONLY TIME 331 00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:08,430 ALL OF US WERE TOGETHER ON THE WHOLE TRIP. 332 00:13:08,533 --> 00:13:12,133 MY DAD PAID TARA REID $50,000 TO TAKE THIS PICTURE. 333 00:13:12,233 --> 00:13:13,603 AT LEAST I THINK THAT'S WHAT HE PAID HER FOR. 334 00:13:13,700 --> 00:13:15,800 - AWESOME. - YOU'RE MISSING THE POINT. 335 00:13:15,900 --> 00:13:19,070 HERE. THIS ONE'S FROM BEFORE MY DAD MADE HIS MILLIONS. 336 00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:21,400 MONEY CHANGED MY FAMILY. 337 00:13:21,500 --> 00:13:23,430 AND I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT CHANGE YOU TOO. 338 00:13:23,533 --> 00:13:24,703 - I HAVEN'T CHANGED. 339 00:13:24,800 --> 00:13:27,570 I JUST HAVE A NEW HAIRCUT... AND A HAT. 340 00:13:27,667 --> 00:13:29,967 A NEW HAIRCUT AND A HAT-- THAT'S IT. 341 00:13:30,067 --> 00:13:31,627 AND A BLAZER. THE HAIRCUT, 342 00:13:31,733 --> 00:13:33,173 THE HAT AND THE BLAZER. AND THAT'S IT. 343 00:13:33,267 --> 00:13:35,067 [cell phone rings] AND A PUBLICIST. 344 00:13:35,133 --> 00:13:36,873 THE HAIRCUT, THE HAT, THE BLAZER AND THE PUBLICIST. 345 00:13:36,967 --> 00:13:38,127 THAT'S IT. 346 00:13:38,233 --> 00:13:40,603 I'LL TOTES BE DOWNSIES IN 5-0. THANKS, DARLING. 347 00:13:40,700 --> 00:13:41,930 AND A NEW WAY OF TALKING. 348 00:13:42,067 --> 00:13:43,097 OKAY, SO THERE'S THE HAIRCUT, 349 00:13:43,200 --> 00:13:44,230 THE HAT, THE BLAZER, 350 00:13:44,333 --> 00:13:45,503 THE PUBLICIST, AND A NEW WAY OF TALKING. 351 00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:47,700 THAT'S IT, WOODIE. - DON'T YOU THINK MILAN 352 00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:51,300 MIGHT JUST BE... USING YOU FOR THE SHOW? 353 00:13:51,400 --> 00:13:53,330 - WHOA. WHAT? USING ME? 354 00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:55,103 - MILAN DOESN'T EVEN KNOW YOUR NAME. 355 00:13:55,200 --> 00:13:56,900 I HEARD HER CALL YOU MEGATRON. 356 00:13:57,067 --> 00:13:58,067 - YEAH? SO? 357 00:13:58,133 --> 00:13:59,533 THAT'S HER PET NAME FOR ME. 358 00:13:59,633 --> 00:14:02,803 - GET YOUR FAT ASS DOWN HERE... WHAT'S-YOUR-NAME! 359 00:14:02,900 --> 00:14:04,370 - AND THERE'S ANOTHER ONE. 360 00:14:04,467 --> 00:14:06,967 SHE GIVES ME A LOT OF PET NAMES. 361 00:14:11,067 --> 00:14:13,597 [cheering] 362 00:14:13,700 --> 00:14:15,970 - * EVERYBODY JUST HAVE A GOOD TIME * 363 00:14:16,067 --> 00:14:18,927 [techno music plays] 364 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:26,967 * 365 00:14:29,233 --> 00:14:32,833 [cheering] - [grunts] 366 00:14:32,933 --> 00:14:34,603 FALCON, COME IN, FALCON. 367 00:14:34,700 --> 00:14:36,570 PERIMETER IS BREACHED. 368 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:38,967 EAGLE OUT! ROGER THAT, EAGLE. 369 00:14:39,067 --> 00:14:40,397 FALCON OUT. 370 00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:42,500 - MILAN, LOOK OVER HERE! - NO, OVER HERE! 371 00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:45,270 - HEY TURK, DO YOU WANT TO TAKE A PICTURE TOGETHER? 372 00:14:45,367 --> 00:14:46,967 - BETTER YET, LET'S SHOOT A VIDEO-- 373 00:14:47,067 --> 00:14:48,527 "ONE NIGHT IN VA-JEENA." 374 00:14:48,633 --> 00:14:49,733 [groans] 375 00:14:52,133 --> 00:14:53,603 - CUT! 376 00:14:53,700 --> 00:14:55,730 - OH, HEY, GISELE! 377 00:14:55,833 --> 00:14:57,403 GIRL, YOU HAVE GOT TO TELL ME 378 00:14:57,500 --> 00:14:59,230 WHAT TOM BRADY'S PENIS LOOKS LIKE. 379 00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:02,173 [growls] 380 00:15:02,267 --> 00:15:04,227 - HEY, WOODIE! 381 00:15:04,333 --> 00:15:05,603 ISN'T THAT YOUR SISTER'S PARTY? 382 00:15:05,700 --> 00:15:07,230 - YEAH, NOT MY SCENE. 383 00:15:07,333 --> 00:15:09,273 I DIDN'T KNOW YOU WORKED ON SATURDAYS? 384 00:15:09,367 --> 00:15:11,127 - YEAH, I PICKED UP SOME EXTRA SHIFTS. 385 00:15:11,233 --> 00:15:13,573 PRINCE MONDO WANTS A DOOR. 386 00:15:13,667 --> 00:15:14,867 TIMES ARE TOUGH, YOU KNOW? 387 00:15:14,967 --> 00:15:16,897 WE DON'T-- WE DON'T HAVE MUCH. 388 00:15:17,067 --> 00:15:19,097 - ARE YOU KIDDING? YOU AND MONDO HAVE IT GREAT. 389 00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:20,970 YOU GUYS CAN TALK ABOUT ANYTHING, 390 00:15:21,067 --> 00:15:23,567 AND YOU JUST LET HIM BE WHO HE IS. 391 00:15:23,667 --> 00:15:25,267 HE'S LUCKY TO HAVE A MOM LIKE YOU. 392 00:15:25,367 --> 00:15:27,267 - OH, WOODIE, YOU'RE A SWEETHEART. 393 00:15:27,367 --> 00:15:29,397 HEY, YOU KNOW, MONDO AND I USUALLY HAVE MOVIE NIGHT 394 00:15:29,500 --> 00:15:32,130 ON SATURDAYS, AND I JUST PAID MY CABLE BILL. 395 00:15:32,233 --> 00:15:34,173 YOU WANT TO COME OVER AND SEE WHAT'S ON THE BOOB TUBE? 396 00:15:34,267 --> 00:15:35,197 - [internal] "BOOB TUBE"? 397 00:15:35,300 --> 00:15:37,770 SHE COULD HAVE JUST SAID "TV." 398 00:15:37,867 --> 00:15:39,567 IT'S REALLY HAPPENING! 399 00:15:46,233 --> 00:15:48,173 - OH, HEY, WADSKA. 400 00:15:48,267 --> 00:15:49,767 - AH! - HAVE YOU SEEN WOODIE? 401 00:15:49,867 --> 00:15:52,067 - NO REAL NAMES! 402 00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:54,370 I WILL MEET YOU AT THE RENDEZVOUS POINT 403 00:15:54,467 --> 00:15:56,167 IN TEN STROKES. 404 00:16:01,067 --> 00:16:03,197 - UH, WOODIE? BALLS! 405 00:16:03,300 --> 00:16:05,270 SORRY! I WAS JUST LOOKING FOR WOODIE. 406 00:16:05,367 --> 00:16:06,797 - NO PROBLEM, MONDO. I WAS JUST HELPING PILAR 407 00:16:06,900 --> 00:16:08,100 FIND HER CONTACT LENS. 408 00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,600 - IT WAS IN MY P-- 409 00:16:09,700 --> 00:16:11,630 [fabric rips] 410 00:16:11,733 --> 00:16:13,303 - OH, HI, MRS. STONE. 411 00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:14,500 HAVE YOU SEEN WOODIE? 412 00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:16,170 - WELL, I CAN'T SAY THAT I HAVE. 413 00:16:16,267 --> 00:16:19,497 SAY, COULD YOU BE A DEAR AND HAND ME THAT CUP OVER THERE? 414 00:16:19,600 --> 00:16:20,870 - SURE. DOING SOME BAKING? 415 00:16:20,967 --> 00:16:22,067 - NOPE. 416 00:16:22,133 --> 00:16:24,703 [violent sniff] 417 00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:27,230 - YOU WANT TO SEE WHAT'S ON? I'M GOING TO GO 418 00:16:27,333 --> 00:16:28,903 SLIP INTO SOMETHING MORE COMFORTABLE. 419 00:16:29,067 --> 00:16:30,627 - [internal] OH, MAN. IN THE MOVIES, 420 00:16:30,733 --> 00:16:32,303 THAT ALWAYS MEANS SEX CLOTHING. 421 00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:33,870 THIS IS YOUR CHANCE, WOOD MAN. 422 00:16:33,967 --> 00:16:35,767 YOU'RE GOING TO MAKE IT WITH BABS-- 423 00:16:35,867 --> 00:16:38,167 YOUR BEST FRIEND'S MOM. 424 00:16:38,267 --> 00:16:41,297 OH MAN, WHY DOES BABS HAVE TO BE MONDO'S MOM? 425 00:16:41,400 --> 00:16:42,630 - ANYTHING GOOD ON? - I DON'T THINK 426 00:16:42,733 --> 00:16:43,703 I CAN GO THROUGH WITH THIS! 427 00:16:43,800 --> 00:16:45,230 I MEAN, DON'T GET ME WRONG, 428 00:16:45,333 --> 00:16:47,203 I-I THINK ABOUT YOU INTENSELY TWICE, 429 00:16:47,300 --> 00:16:48,800 MAYBE THREE TIMES A DAY. 430 00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:50,300 I MEAN, SOMETIMES YOU'RE JUMBLED UP 431 00:16:50,400 --> 00:16:52,270 WITH MEGAN FOX OR KATY PERRY, 432 00:16:52,367 --> 00:16:54,197 BUT YOU ARE DEFINITELY ALWAYS IN THE MIX. 433 00:16:54,300 --> 00:16:56,670 - WOODIE, I THINK YOU HAVE THE WRONG IDEA. 434 00:16:56,767 --> 00:16:58,797 - AND I DON'T THINK IT'D BE VERY COOL TO HIM 435 00:16:58,900 --> 00:17:01,170 IF WE, YOU KNOW-- - ALL RIGHT, WOODIE. 436 00:17:01,267 --> 00:17:03,097 I'LL TRY TO RESTRAIN MYSELF. 437 00:17:03,200 --> 00:17:05,130 YOU'RE A GOOD FRIEND TO MONDO. 438 00:17:05,233 --> 00:17:06,503 NOW LET'S CHANNEL SOME OF THAT EXTRA ENERGY 439 00:17:06,600 --> 00:17:08,300 INTO MAKING SOME POPCORN. 440 00:17:08,400 --> 00:17:09,600 - WHEW! 441 00:17:11,667 --> 00:17:15,467 - THIS ONE'S FROM MY AFRICAN SISTER BOOMIE. 442 00:17:15,567 --> 00:17:17,867 "A GENEROUS DONATION HAS BEEN MADE ON YOUR BEHALF 443 00:17:17,967 --> 00:17:20,667 TO THE SAVE DARFUR FOUNDATION." 444 00:17:20,767 --> 00:17:22,827 AH, BITCH! THIS IS MY PARTY! 445 00:17:22,933 --> 00:17:24,433 WHY ARE OTHER PEOPLE GETTING PRESENTS? 446 00:17:24,533 --> 00:17:26,573 - NEXT ONE'S FROM US, MONEYFACE. 447 00:17:26,667 --> 00:17:29,967 [car horn toots] - OH, MY [bleep]ING GOD! 448 00:17:30,067 --> 00:17:31,827 - OH, YOU'RE WELCOME. 449 00:17:31,933 --> 00:17:34,973 - IT'S NAVY BLUE, NOT MIDNIGHT BLUE! 450 00:17:35,067 --> 00:17:38,267 GOD, DON'T YOU EVER LISTEN? 451 00:17:38,367 --> 00:17:41,297 - UH, HERE MILAN. OPEN THIS ONE. 452 00:17:41,400 --> 00:17:42,470 IT'S FROM WOODIE. 453 00:17:42,567 --> 00:17:46,297 - EW, WHAT, DID HE FIND THIS ON THE GROUND? 454 00:17:49,433 --> 00:17:51,503 - WHAT'D YOU DO THAT FOR? 455 00:17:51,600 --> 00:17:53,200 WOODIE PUT A LOT OF THOUGHT INTO THAT. 456 00:17:53,300 --> 00:17:56,100 YOU PEOPLE ARE SO FIXATED ON MONEY 457 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:59,200 THAT YOU'VE FORGOTTEN WOODIE EVEN EXISTS. 458 00:17:59,300 --> 00:18:00,570 - THAT'S NOT TRUE! 459 00:18:00,667 --> 00:18:01,697 TELL HIM, WOODIE. 460 00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:03,530 - SPEAK UP, SON. 461 00:18:03,633 --> 00:18:04,833 - THAT'S A MOP! 462 00:18:04,933 --> 00:18:06,603 - STAND UP STRAIGHT, DEAR. 463 00:18:06,700 --> 00:18:07,900 - OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH. 464 00:18:08,067 --> 00:18:09,327 YOU'RE EMBARRASSING ME. 465 00:18:09,433 --> 00:18:11,133 - ME EMBARRASS YOU? 466 00:18:11,233 --> 00:18:12,973 [microphone feedback] 467 00:18:13,067 --> 00:18:14,497 I'VE GOT THE COOLEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD, 468 00:18:14,600 --> 00:18:16,400 AND HE'S YOUR BROTHER AND YOUR SON, 469 00:18:16,500 --> 00:18:18,170 AND NONE OF US EVEN APPRECIATE HIM. 470 00:18:18,267 --> 00:18:20,097 SURE ALL THIS WEALTH CAN BE SEDUCTIVE. 471 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:21,430 I GOT SEDUCED TOO. 472 00:18:21,533 --> 00:18:24,633 DID I LIKE GETTING ATTENTION FROM A GIRL? YES. 473 00:18:24,733 --> 00:18:26,433 AND DID I LIKE BEING SHOWERED WITH GIFTS 474 00:18:26,533 --> 00:18:28,873 A POOR KID COULD NEVER AFFORD? YES. 475 00:18:28,967 --> 00:18:30,667 AND DID I LIKE THAT ONE DAY WHEN MILAN WORE THE TUBE DRESS 476 00:18:30,767 --> 00:18:33,567 AND HAD THAT NIP SLIP? A THOUSAND TIMES, YES. 477 00:18:33,667 --> 00:18:37,167 BUT I THINK WE ALL NEED TO FOCUS ON WHAT'S REALLY IMPORTANT. 478 00:18:37,267 --> 00:18:39,667 [walkie-talkies beep] UH... 479 00:18:39,767 --> 00:18:41,067 SO IN SHORT, YOU'RE A TOTAL BITCH 480 00:18:41,133 --> 00:18:42,573 AND I'M BREAKING UP WITH YOU ON NATIONAL TELEVISION, 481 00:18:42,667 --> 00:18:43,797 BUT I HOPE YOU LEARN FROM YOUR MISTAKES 482 00:18:43,900 --> 00:18:45,070 AND BECOME A BETTER PERSON. 483 00:18:45,133 --> 00:18:47,103 HAPPY BIRTHDAY. 484 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:50,830 AND HONEY, THE NAME IS MONDO. [cheering] 485 00:18:53,700 --> 00:18:56,070 - MONDO, THAT WAS BADASS. 486 00:18:56,100 --> 00:18:58,500 COME ON. I KNOW A WAY OUT. 487 00:19:00,533 --> 00:19:02,803 [tires screech] - HOP IN. 488 00:19:02,900 --> 00:19:05,730 - YOU GUYS BETTER GET OUT OF HERE. 489 00:19:05,833 --> 00:19:08,833 - TEN, NINE, 490 00:19:08,933 --> 00:19:10,903 EIGHT... - JEENA, YOU KNOW 491 00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:12,067 HOW WE WERE TALKING BEFORE 492 00:19:12,167 --> 00:19:13,797 ABOUT HOW I DESERVED SOMEBODY BETTER, 493 00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:16,600 AND YOU DESERVED SOMEBODY BETTER? 494 00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:17,800 - UH-HUH. 495 00:19:17,900 --> 00:19:19,270 - WELL, NOW THAT I'M SINGLE AGAIN, 496 00:19:19,367 --> 00:19:21,667 MAYBE IT'S TIME FOR YOU AND I-- 497 00:19:21,767 --> 00:19:25,967 - ONE. SUPER SWEET SABOTAGE! 498 00:19:26,067 --> 00:19:28,067 - WE'LL JUST TALK ON MONDAY! 499 00:19:28,100 --> 00:19:32,070 [explosions] - [screams] 500 00:19:37,567 --> 00:19:39,297 [horse neighs] 501 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:41,470 [horse whinnies] - PISS OFF, HORSE! 502 00:19:43,633 --> 00:19:46,103 [all gasp] 503 00:19:46,200 --> 00:19:50,370 [laughter] 504 00:19:54,067 --> 00:19:56,297 - NO RUSH, KID. WE'RE ON OVERTIME. 505 00:19:56,400 --> 00:19:57,600 [smash, fizzle] 506 00:19:57,700 --> 00:19:59,370 - PRECIOUS, YOU A DUMMY! 507 00:19:59,467 --> 00:20:01,767 DON'T NOBODY WANT YOU, DON'T NOBODY NEED YOU. 508 00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:04,797 - MAN, MARTIN LAWRENCE IS NOT FUNNY IN THIS. 509 00:20:04,900 --> 00:20:06,700 [tires squeal] - MONDO! 510 00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:09,200 - OH, MOM! I AM SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU. 511 00:20:09,300 --> 00:20:11,970 I'M SO SORRY I WAS SUCH A DOUCHE. 512 00:20:12,067 --> 00:20:13,827 OH, YOU'RE THE BEST MOM IN THE WORLD. 513 00:20:13,933 --> 00:20:15,933 AND WOODIE, MAN, YOU WERE RIGHT ABOUT YOUR SISTER, 514 00:20:16,033 --> 00:20:17,333 AND ABOUT ME FORGETTING WHO I AM, 515 00:20:17,433 --> 00:20:19,073 AND ABOUT EVERYTHING. 516 00:20:19,167 --> 00:20:21,027 SO, WHAT DO YOU SAY? 517 00:20:21,133 --> 00:20:22,333 CAN YOU GUYS FORGIVE ME? 518 00:20:22,433 --> 00:20:25,273 - OF COURSE, BRO. - I DON'T KNOW. 519 00:20:25,367 --> 00:20:28,727 I SHOULD PROBABLY ASK... THE TICKLE MONSTER! 520 00:20:28,833 --> 00:20:30,403 TICKLE, TICKLE, TICKLE! 521 00:20:30,500 --> 00:20:31,600 [wet squish] - OOPS! 522 00:20:31,700 --> 00:20:33,530 - UH-OH. - POPPED A MAYO PACKET. 523 00:20:33,633 --> 00:20:35,503 - WOODIE, YOU HAVE A CONDIMENT POCKET TOO? 524 00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:37,730 - BOARD SHORTS, NO POCKETS. GOT TO GO! 525 00:20:40,067 --> 00:20:42,967 [groovy music] 526 00:20:43,067 --> 00:20:44,567 * 527 00:20:44,617 --> 00:20:49,167 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 37236

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