Original subtitles

>> Hack freak!

Hack freak!

Hack freak!

Hack freak.

An armpit stain.

How embarrassing.

Now you see it.

Now you don't.

The dryer towel absorbs the

stain.

Taxi!

Hack freak.

>> Oh, god.

>> Hyah!

...you're in big stubble.

>> That's gonna be awful.

>> See which shaving hack cuts

above the rest.

>> [ Chuckles ]

>> Oh, yeah.

>> Plus, hotel hacks to turn

your stay into a spa day.

>> [ Sighs ]

>> What your dentist doesn't

want you to know about

toothpaste.

>> And a light bulb hack you'll

have to see to believe.

Science!

>> "Hack my life"...

>> [ Shouts ]

>> ...starts now.

>> This is a terrible hack!

There we go.

Cob isdelicious,

forever to eat.

>> So we're gonna see if we

can't speed the process along

using a power drill.

[ Drill whirs ]

And decide whether this is

hack or wack.

First thing's first, before we

let crazy Brooke near our mouth

with a power tool...

>> [ Gnawing noises ]

Okay, whoa.

>> ...we're gonna go ahead and

eat some corn on the cob the

old-fashioned way.

Never thought of corn on the cob

as the patient man's food, but

it does take a minute to get

through.

>> Very time-consuming.

Let's drill you up.

Take the drill bit...

>> Uh-huh.

>> ...at least six inches.

>> Yeah.

>> Give it to this corn in the

tail pipe.

The corn.

Kevin just violently shoved it

in.

Either is fine.

>> I disagree with your

assessment, but fair enough.

>> Let's suit up and go

"mad Max" on some corn.

>> Oh, yes. Safety first.

>> Safety first on this show.

>> You want to make sure your

eyes are protected.

Great.

Oh, god!

Good thing I had these bad boys

on.

>> I'm gonna butter up real

quick.

Just...

>> Oh, yeah.

>> I mean, god, regardless of

what happens, that feels like

some sort of a hack right there.

>> Yeah.

Yeah, clogged arteries, 0 to 60.

>> Whoo!

Let's eat some corn.

>> [ Sighs ] Let's.

>> [ Sighs ] Okay.

Oh, god.

[ Gnawing ]

>> Is that working for you?

>> Yeah.

>> I mean, you could bite, bite,

bite, rotate, bite, bite, bite,

rotate.

[ Groaning ]

>> Nope.

>> I'm pissed!

I wanted it to work! Oh!

Let's just call it.

It's wack.

[ Buzzer ]

>> This hack is wack.

You know what?

Wasn't a complete fail.

You did discover that as a

method of buttering an ear of

corn, you're set.

>> Just gonna console myself

with my rotating butter stick.

>> Hmm.

'Merica.

>> Ah. [ Chuckles ]

♪♪♪

>> [ Whimpering ]

>> Would you know what to use to

hack your way out of a jam?

Let's find out in today's pop

quiz.

♪♪♪

Hey, chief!

So, you're camping in the middle

of nowhere.

>> Pretty adventurous, huh?

>> You've got the rope, but you

forgot your knife.

>> Isn't it ironic?

>> Well, cheer up, camper,

because there's something close

by that can cut through that

rope in no time.

>> There is?!

>> Let's see if you know what it

is.

Sharpened branch, "c," some more

rope, or "d" the sexual tension

i'm...just really feeling

between us right now.

>> I'm gonna go out on a limb

here and say it's "d."

>> Oh. [ Scoffs ]

Sorry, bud.

The answer is "c," some more

rope.

It's simple.

Here's how it works.

Place the rope you want to cut

beneath your feet with the cut

point in the middle.

Loop the second rope underneath

and pull back and forth until

you cut the other rope.

You know, there's, uh, room in

this tent for two.

[ Ding! ]

>> Ooh.

Better luck next time, buddy.

This has been your pop quiz.

Hack you later.

>> Sometimes a household item is

so useful, it ascends into the

pantheon of great hacking tools.

Today we celebrate one that's

truly become a hack all-star --

toothpaste.

Sure, it's the key to good

hygiene when starting off your

day, but four out of five

dentists recommend it for fresh

hacks.

Did Fifi face off with a skunk

and lose?

Wet her down, squirt toothpaste

onto her coat, and massage it

in.

She'll be stench-free while she

plans her revenge.

All-star.

Shoes not looking so fresh?

Well, toothpaste is the answer.

Just scrub away the dirt and

make those sneakers as white as

a movie star's smile.

All-star.

Leave the fancy silver Polish to

"downton Abbey."

Toothpaste shines up silver

without all the imperial fuss.

All-star.

Got an unwelcome visitor on your

face?

Well, send that pimple packing

with a dab of toothpaste.

Leave it on overnight and say

hello, clear skin.

All-star.

It's moving day, and the posters

and picture frames have made

Swiss cheese out of your walls.

But toothpaste can fill in for

spackle by filling in those

holes.

All-star.

All out of hair gel?

Well, gel-based toothpaste can

give that perfectly coiffed look

in a pinch.

And bonus -- it makes hair smell

clean and fresh.

Just remember to use a bigger

brush.

All-star.

Oh, toothpaste, you make

everything fresher.

You're a true all-star.

Turn your hotel mini bar into a

smorgasbord.

>> And...

>> Hyah!

>> ...see which of these pantry

products can give your razor an

edge.

>> Ahh.

>> Oh, god. O0 c1

>> hack freak!

Hack freak!

Hack freak!

Shhh.

Anybody hungry?

A banana.

Nature's apple.

Bet you think I'm gonna open it

this way.

You'd be wrong.

This way is easier.

No messy strings.

It's how they do it in nature.

Mmm, mmm, mm, mm.

Hack freak.

>> You know, one of the best

parts of going to the barber --

hands down, it's getting a shave

from a big, strong, beautiful

man like Andre here.

Love you, Andre.

But what do you do once you've

run out of shaving cream?

We're gonna find out right now

in this hacksperiment.

Hacksperiment in the history of

"hack my life."

We have three master shavers,

three very brave bearded

volunteers, and we are gonna

test out three possible

substitutions for shaving cream.

You guys ready to see what

you're working with?

>> Yes.

>> Hyah! Hah!

>> Ooh.

>> These are viable substitutes

for shaving cream.

We've got honey, some olive oil,

and we have whipped cream.

>> Oh, boy.

>> You guys have a preference?

It's just the closest thing to

pre-shave oils.

>> Rich.

>> Guess whipped cream is the

most, like, lather.

I'll take the whipped cream.

>> Are you cool with honey?

>> I guess I am. We'll see.

>> [ Laughs ]

More importantly, areyou

with honey?

>> Uh, yeah.

That's gonna be awful.

Hacksperiment, we're going to

keep things nice and scientific

and judge each hack by

precision and cleanliness.

Let's [bleep] Do this.

>> [ Laughs ]

>> Ahh.

>> Oh, god.

>> Wow.

>> And how is that massaging in,

Andre?

>> Not good at all, actually.

>> Okay, that's great!

Garby, how's that feel?

>> What about you, Evan?

Ahh.

Rich, you were saying that

that's gonna have the

consistency of shaving cream.

>> It's starting to just turn

into cream.

>> It's just milk.

♪♪♪

>> It's so sticky.

The honey is not as bad as I

thought it would be, but it's

still pretty awful.

Things to use than honey.

>> That does not look

comfortable.

>> No.

No, you've -- that's like nail

on the head.

>> How precise is the whipped

cream?

>> Can't really see through it.

The stench is disgusting.

And it's extremely sticky.

>> Evan, how you feeling right

now, buddy?

>> I'm feeling like a wedding

cake that's been left out in the

sun too long.

>> [ Laughs ]

How's the olive oil?

>> The olive oil is working out

really well, actually.

>> Yeah?

>> Yes.

Pretty precise, you know, 'cause

I can see what I'm doing, you

know, nice and clear.

>> Does it feel comfortable?

>> Feels great.

>> Yeah?

The olive oil.

It, like, feels amazing.

>> Congratulations.

>> [ Laughs ]

>> All right, gentlemen, I think

we've tortured our volunteers

enough.

I feel like we're not gonna

learn anything new past this

point.

Let's call it.

Rich, it looked like you were

going to lose your lunch a

couple times throughout this

hacksperiment.

>> Definitely.

>> So, whipped cream allowed for

a clean shave.

It just took quite awhile to get

there, did it not, rich?

>> Yeah, some of the hair

started to stick together.

>> More importantly, Evan, how

was it for you?

>> The shave with the whipped

cream felt okay aside from the

warm, you know, remnants

dripping around down my neck.

It was pretty gross.

>> Let's move on to the sweetest

hack, the old honey bear.

Andre, how was honey for a

shave?

>> The honey wasn't able to get

down to the skin to provide any

kind of lubricant.

>> Would you ever reach for

honey in a pinch?

>> No. No. Nope.

It's awful.

>> Now, how did the olive oil

feel while it was on your skin?

>> It definitely was smooth.

The razor glided on my face.

I didn't get any cuts, so it's

100%.

>> It's able to get, like,

really, like to the surface of

the skin and, like, bypass the

hair, which is like the most

important part.

>> So, if you went into a barber

shop and someone whipped out a

giant bottle of olive oil, would

you freak out or would you be

okay with it now?

>> Now would be okay.

I think I'd let them do it.

>> The results of this

hacksperiment are very clear.

If you find yourself without

shaving cream, get your hand out

of the honey jar and don't be

fooled by whipped cream.

In a pinch, go for the olive

oil.

♪♪♪

[ Cellphone vibrates ]

♪♪♪

>> Sometimes ordinary people do

extraordinary things, all in the

name of hacking.

For instance, take Willie.

After back to back meetings and

a six-hour flight, he's

exhausted.

But there's no time to spare

because in less than an hour,

his summer camp sweetheart will

be coming by to visit.

Good thing Willie's got the hot

hotel hacks to win her back,

'cause he's a hack hero!

With the clock ticking, Willie

can either unwind with his

favorite show or he could take a

pre-date bath.

But this old road dog has an

awesome trick.

By sending a video call to his

tablet and pointing his

smartphone at the TV, our hero

can watch televisionand

up.

And with a bonus hack, he makes

a waterproof tablet holder from

a sandwich bag and pants hanger.

Aquaman's got nothing on Willie.

Now to conquer that tired skin.

Sugar packets that came with his

coffee setup make a refreshing

face scrub.

With cheeks this sweet, she'll

be stuck on Willie in no time.

Meanwhile, up above, his

wrinkled dress shirt gets

steamed to date-night

perfection.

Full steam ahead, Willie.

To push Kate's nostalgia button,

Willie's got his old Cologne.

But he knows better than to

spray that swill directly on

himself.

By spritzing into a light bulb,

the heat from the bulb fills the

room with his scent while

masking the stench of

desperation from the last hotel

guest.

No hotel date would be complete

without some hacked-up snacks

from the mini bar.

Willie's on it, turning his free

pillow chocolates into s'mores

with the help of a hotel hair

dryer, just like the old camping

days, but naughtier, 'cause this

time Willie's serving it with

champagne.

No ice bucket?

No problem.

He feels his shower cap with ice

to keep the champagne chilly.

[ Knock on door ]

Cheers, Willie.

Your motel mojo is sure to score

you and your lady a late

checkout tomorrow.

Hack on, hack hero.

>> I feel like I'm doing a lot

of bad touch.

>> ...things get up close and

personal in the hack lab.

Yes.

>> And Kevin shows you how to

light up your life without a

bulb.

>> Let there be lead! O0 c1

♪♪♪

>> The ballpoint pen, friend of

doodlers everywhere.

Hack from history?

Weymouth, Massachusetts, 1888.

Everyone's using fussy fountain

pens, but leather Tanner

John j. Loud struggles to write

on his tough leather pouches.

>> Hey, pen, you need more

balls.

>> Inspired, loud designs a pen

with a small rotating steel ball

in a socket.

It writes on leather, but its

thick ink is a disaster on

everything else.

Fast forward to Budapest,

Hungary, 1938.

Newspaper editor lászló bíró

tires of fountain pens and their

smudges.

Seeing how quickly newspaper ink

dries, lászló takes that ink,

refines loud's ballpoint design,

and the world's first

paper-friendly ballpoint pen is

born!

Thanks to these pioneers, now

banks have something to put on a

leash and still lose anyway.

Baller hack from history.

♪♪♪

♪♪♪

>> Welcome to

"let's make a thing!", where one

man's trash is another man's

treasure.

See what we've got today.

Oh.

Mason jars.

My mom used to make pickles out

of these things.

That was before the accident.

But today we're gonna turn this

into a pencil-lead light bulb.

Gonna need a pie tin, some gator

clips, and last but not least,

some pencil refills or graphite

or pencil lead.

And this is the key ingredient

to the pencil-lead light bulb.

[ Crash ]

Step one!

Let's make a power source.

We got batteries.

We got to tape them together.

We're gonna lay them down

positive to negative, forming an

alkaline human centipede, making

sure there's a nice, secure fit

and keep the train chugging

along right to funtown.

Guys, a quick science tip for

you -- the more batteries, the

more power.

[ Ding! ]

Now we need a base for

everything to rest on, and for

that, we're gonna grab our

scissors and the pie tin, and

we're gonna poke two holes that

we're gonna pass our gator clips

through.

Perfect.

Grab a toilet paper roll.

I highly recommend doing all of

thisbefore

your house.

Now, we pass our gator clips

through the holes that we made.

You just want them peeking up

just a little bit from the top.

And now we're gonna add some

graphite, or our pencil lead.

We're gonna clip it in between

the gators here.

Graphite actually has a pretty

high resistance, which allows it

to give it a nice glow without

igniting too quickly.

It up, and place it over

everything we've created on top

of the pie tin, and that's gonna

actually limit the amount of

oxygen that gets in.

Now, that will allow the

filament, or the graphite, in

this case, to burn a little bit

longer.

Circuit, so we're gonna take

negative to negative, positive

to positive, and right away you

see the reaction.

[ Gasps ]

Let there be lead!

Science!

Oh, it's burning too bright!

And...there we go.

Sooner than I promised, as

always.

Whoo! Hope it was good for you.

For sagging slacks.

>> Oh! This is a terrible hack!

>> Tumblr's hack mail is next.

>> You ever get halfway to work

and you look down and realize,

"forgot my belt!"

That is the worst thing ever.

>> So we're taking it to you,

the people, to find hacks for

keeping your pants up.

Hack number one comes from

Nikki s., who says...

We're going to hold up your

pants with the safety pins.

I'm gonna do the small one.

>> You're gonna -- oh, okay.

>> Well, do you want to do it?

Do you trust me?

>> No, I trust you more than I

trust me.

Yeah, absolutely.

>> I'm just gonna do one on each

side.

>> I understand using your shirt

to hold up the pants, okay?

Like, I get that.

But now it's just gonna drag on

the shirt.

It's just gonna pull it down.

>> It looks like a real sloppy

onesie.

No, that's not a great look.

So that's why...

Just gonna do the old wrap.

Oh.

>> Yes, 'cause I'm gonna go to

the yacht mixer.

Yes, hey, muffy. Yeah.

>> Nikki s. Forgot to include

"bring your tennis racket."

>> Exactly.

Hack number two comes to us from

Alex m.

He suggests...

The word is German, by the way,

for "spring clip."

>> [ Gasps ]

>> Orspring clip!

Let me try.

Let me see if I can get it.

>> Can you get both?

>> Here we go.

>> All right.

What do you want me to do?

I feel like I'm doing a lot of

bad touch.

>> No, no, all touch is bad

touch for me.

I'm very sensitive.

Ahh! Ahh!

>> Kev!

>> [ Gasping ]

>> Okay. There we go.

>> [ Shouts ]

Oh! This is a terrible hack!

Oh, it does not feel good at

all!

Please stop tugging on it.

Ohhh!

That is real tight.

There's no circulation.

>> Do you want to try two?

>> Yeah, let's try two.

>> Oh, this could -- okay.

>> Cinch it up. Oh, yeah.

Oh, look at this.

>> All right.

>> That works.

That just gets it a little extra

tighter.

That's stopping them from coming

down.

>> Technically your pants are

up.

You don't want to show it,

though, so you're gonna have to

keep your shirt out.

Our final hack comes from

Ben c., who writes...

Well, Ben, I doubt that very

much, but I don't know why a

shoestring wouldn't work.

Belt before.

>> You want to do an orange?

>> Safety orange?

>> Yeah, safety orange.

A hack that's probably gonna be

totally effective, but you want

to cover it up.

I mean, you essentially turn

your pants into drawstring

pants.

You also have more control over

how tense you want.

>> Totally.

I could really cinch these bad

boys up.

I could double knot, I could let

them loose.

I like the versatility.

So let's run down these hacks.

>> First we had the safety pins

with the shirt pinned to the

pants.

>> Yes.

>> And then with a sweater tied

around the waist to cover it.

>> Which didn't really solve the

problem.

The pants are still gonna sag

down.

They're just gonna take the

shirt with it.

>> Hack number two -- the

carabiner.

You know, the likelihood, first

of all, of having a carabiner

might be low, but it worked.

And if you have two, it's even

better.

>> With the shoelace, dynamism.

>> Yes.

>> Look at this.

Oh, not so tight.

Ohh! Tight!

>> It's more likely you're gonna

find a shoelace lying around

before any of these other items,

so I think it's kind of a

foolproof hack.

>> I think it's time to make it

official, Brooke.

>> All right.

>> The shoelace belt gets our...

>> Hack seal of approval!

>> Congratulations, Ben.

Look at how much fun we're

having.

This, so go to hackmylifetrutv.

Tumblr.com and submit some hacks

today.

Today.

>> Can you help me out, sir?

Uh, I'm in kind of a bind.

I just do hacks!

I'm from long island, man!

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