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1
00:00:03,503 --> 00:00:05,771
We look like missionaries!
2
00:00:05,773 --> 00:00:07,539
Who dresses like this?
3
00:00:07,541 --> 00:00:09,541
People with jobs.
4
00:00:09,543 --> 00:00:12,277
You are officially signed
up with my temp company!
5
00:00:12,279 --> 00:00:13,412
Whee.
6
00:00:13,414 --> 00:00:15,147
You're about to
get evicted, Dan.
7
00:00:15,149 --> 00:00:17,349
You need to make money somehow.
8
00:00:17,351 --> 00:00:20,486
There has got to be a better
way than working for it.
9
00:00:20,488 --> 00:00:21,620
(phone rings)
10
00:00:21,622 --> 00:00:23,956
Hello?
Thank you so much.
11
00:00:23,958 --> 00:00:25,491
Great news!
12
00:00:25,493 --> 00:00:26,959
Elise is leaving you?
13
00:00:26,961 --> 00:00:28,327
The temp company found us jobs.
14
00:00:28,329 --> 00:00:29,328
And the best part?
15
00:00:29,330 --> 00:00:32,398
We'll be working together!
16
00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:35,934
We can carpool! It's fun
AND it's eco-friendly.
17
00:00:35,936 --> 00:00:38,337
Sometimes you just
make me sad.
18
00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:45,444
See you bright and early!
19
00:00:45,446 --> 00:00:46,845
Get stuffed!
20
00:00:53,353 --> 00:00:54,586
Dan?
21
00:00:55,522 --> 00:00:56,688
(snoring)
22
00:00:56,690 --> 00:00:58,290
Time for work, buddy!
23
00:00:58,292 --> 00:01:01,093
Come on, wake up!
24
00:01:01,095 --> 00:01:02,828
This is why I budgeted
extra time...
25
00:01:03,630 --> 00:01:05,397
(dan snores)
26
00:01:19,245 --> 00:01:21,346
What--? Where am I?
27
00:01:21,348 --> 00:01:22,981
WHERE ARE YOU
PEOPLE TAKING ME!?
28
00:01:22,983 --> 00:01:25,250
I WILL NOT BE TRAPPED
LIKE A RAT!
29
00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:27,619
Ah Dan, wake up!
It's me, Chris.
30
00:01:27,621 --> 00:01:29,154
We're going to work.
31
00:01:29,156 --> 00:01:31,457
Oh. Right.
32
00:01:34,961 --> 00:01:37,863
Chris and Dan,
reporting for duty.
33
00:01:37,860 --> 00:01:39,340
I demand a raise.
34
00:01:39,380 --> 00:01:41,810
Cute. Okay, here's the deal:
35
00:01:41,840 --> 00:01:44,000
People are past due on their
magazine subscriptions.
36
00:01:44,004 --> 00:01:46,772
You call them and
tell them to pay up.
37
00:01:46,774 --> 00:01:48,607
Think you monkeys
can handle that?
38
00:01:48,609 --> 00:01:50,109
You bet!
39
00:01:50,111 --> 00:01:52,377
Who are you calling a monkey?!
40
00:01:57,917 --> 00:02:00,719
Stupid boss... Call ME names?
41
00:02:00,721 --> 00:02:02,321
(happily humming)
42
00:02:02,323 --> 00:02:03,722
Chris, I'm leaving.
43
00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:06,191
I can't work for someone who
treats me like an idiot.
44
00:02:06,193 --> 00:02:07,826
BLEEP!
45
00:02:13,333 --> 00:02:14,633
Oh... That's it.
46
00:02:16,669 --> 00:02:19,004
Aw, office monkey look upset.
47
00:02:19,006 --> 00:02:20,305
Office monkey want a banana?
48
00:02:20,307 --> 00:02:24,143
No, office monkey
want-- Now Stop that!
49
00:02:24,145 --> 00:02:26,945
Just give me my eighteen dollars
and I'll be on my way.
50
00:02:26,947 --> 00:02:28,947
Eighteen dollars? You
make nine dollars an hour,
51
00:02:28,949 --> 00:02:30,949
and you've been here
for five minutes.
52
00:02:30,951 --> 00:02:32,951
Pain and suffering.
53
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:35,354
You leave now, I'll make sure
you never get another temp job.
54
00:02:35,356 --> 00:02:37,956
Which means you're
getting evicted, Dan.
55
00:02:37,950 --> 00:02:39,120
How did you know about--
56
00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:43,060
Look, I am in the middle
of...nothing, actually.
57
00:02:43,063 --> 00:02:43,962
But that's still more
interesting than
58
00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,130
talking to you.
59
00:02:45,150 --> 00:02:46,690
Get out of my office.
60
00:02:56,910 --> 00:03:01,280
BOSS!!!
61
00:03:13,293 --> 00:03:17,329
Dan? Calm down, Dan.
We just got here.
62
00:03:17,331 --> 00:03:19,565
Whose side are you on?
63
00:03:19,567 --> 00:03:22,734
The corporate machine that
crushes dreams beneath its
64
00:03:22,736 --> 00:03:26,038
iron bootheel, or the
scrappy little guy?
65
00:03:26,040 --> 00:03:28,874
Which side signs the paychecks?
66
00:03:28,876 --> 00:03:32,911
Our boss is pure evil, no doubt
sucking the life-essence from
67
00:03:32,913 --> 00:03:37,416
her office drones, causing our
very souls to wither and die.
68
00:03:37,418 --> 00:03:39,718
That's just temp work, Dan.
69
00:03:39,720 --> 00:03:44,456
I feel that way every job I've
ever had. You get used to it.
70
00:03:44,458 --> 00:03:46,325
You kinda...Kind of go numb...
71
00:03:46,320 --> 00:03:48,820
Well not me, pal.
72
00:03:48,870 --> 00:03:52,390
I have a plan that involves
rigging the boss's chair to
73
00:03:52,390 --> 00:03:54,480
launch her out of her office
window
74
00:03:54,480 --> 00:03:56,450
at a hundred miles an hour.
75
00:03:57,180 --> 00:04:00,200
Where will you live when
you can't pay rent?
76
00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:02,941
I Don't care. Get to work.
77
00:04:07,146 --> 00:04:09,248
Hello sir, were you aware that
you haven't paid for your
78
00:04:09,250 --> 00:04:12,251
subscription to "Human
Hunter" magazine?
79
00:04:12,253 --> 00:04:13,352
Oh, you were?
80
00:04:13,354 --> 00:04:13,852
BLEEP!
81
00:04:13,854 --> 00:04:16,922
Ah. Well, I'm terribly sorry to
disturb you during your nap.
82
00:04:16,924 --> 00:04:22,894
I'll try back later.
83
00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,765
(dan to himself) Always
Mister Negative...
84
00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:28,233
(boss o.s.)
Besides, I'd just open
85
00:04:28,235 --> 00:04:29,735
my window and let the bugs
out.
86
00:04:29,737 --> 00:04:36,108
Oh uh... This isn't about you.
I meant our other stupid boss.
87
00:04:36,110 --> 00:04:37,743
If you can't use the
computers responsibly,
88
00:04:37,745 --> 00:04:39,745
you can always do some filing.
89
00:04:42,749 --> 00:04:44,116
A comes first, then B.
90
00:04:54,193 --> 00:04:56,061
Yes, I'm aware that the CIA
doesn't have jurisdiction to
91
00:04:56,063 --> 00:04:57,629
operate on domestic soil,
92
00:04:57,631 --> 00:05:00,098
but I still don't understand
what that has to do with your
93
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:03,268
magazine subscription
payment--hello?
94
00:05:05,690 --> 00:05:07,360
Dan's log, hour three,
95
00:05:07,380 --> 00:05:09,370
minute twenty-seven
of my imprisonment.
96
00:05:09,730 --> 00:05:13,110
I have escaped my cell, and am
now gathering intelligence.
97
00:05:13,113 --> 00:05:14,980
(dan v.o.)
First, I have discovered
98
00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:18,517
that one can spend great amounts
of time in the restroom without
99
00:05:18,519 --> 00:05:19,584
arousing suspicion.
100
00:05:19,586 --> 00:05:20,986
(dan v.o.)
Though unfortunately
101
00:05:20,980 --> 00:05:24,290
there are limited time-killing
activities to be had there.
102
00:05:24,610 --> 00:05:26,420
(dan v.o.)
Perhaps not surprisingly,
103
00:05:26,420 --> 00:05:28,960
the longer I stay in the
bathroom, the less likely
104
00:05:28,962 --> 00:05:31,830
anyone is to ask "why" upon
my return.
105
00:05:32,620 --> 00:05:33,850
(dan v.o.)
So far, my best
106
00:05:33,850 --> 00:05:36,230
camouflage has been simply
sitting at my desk,
107
00:05:36,236 --> 00:05:38,704
staring at the computer screen.
108
00:05:38,706 --> 00:05:39,738
That's what I like to see.
109
00:05:39,740 --> 00:05:42,441
Work smarter, not harder.
110
00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:43,208
(dan v.o.)
Though it's very easy
111
00:05:43,210 --> 00:05:44,376
to lose consciousness.
112
00:05:44,378 --> 00:05:45,677
(slamming sound)
113
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:47,946
Aah! Ow!
114
00:05:47,948 --> 00:05:49,181
(dan v.o.)
Finally, crude weapons
115
00:05:49,183 --> 00:05:51,717
can be forged from the
materials at hand...
116
00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:53,000
(dan v.o.)
...and it does provide
117
00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:56,720
some passing amusement to
use my fellow office drones
118
00:05:56,724 --> 00:05:59,391
for target practice.
119
00:05:59,393 --> 00:06:00,258
Hey.
120
00:06:00,260 --> 00:06:01,293
THWAP!
121
00:06:01,295 --> 00:06:02,160
(office drone o.s.)
Auughhh!
122
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:04,963
However, those that share
my dismal situation
123
00:06:04,965 --> 00:06:09,901
are not the enemy. There is
only one enemy, and she is--
124
00:06:09,903 --> 00:06:10,902
Right behind you.
125
00:06:10,904 --> 00:06:11,670
Whaa!
126
00:06:11,672 --> 00:06:12,504
Get back to your desk!
127
00:06:23,916 --> 00:06:25,117
I'm going over the wall.
128
00:06:25,119 --> 00:06:26,585
Wha-what? What wall?
129
00:06:26,587 --> 00:06:27,486
Catch me!
130
00:06:28,154 --> 00:06:28,720
(crashing sound)
131
00:06:29,655 --> 00:06:31,256
Oof! Can't... breathe...
132
00:06:31,258 --> 00:06:34,259
I'll send you a postcard
from freedomville!
133
00:06:34,261 --> 00:06:35,927
Ow, Hey!
134
00:06:41,830 --> 00:06:44,120
Can you explain why I found
these in the trash can?
135
00:06:45,430 --> 00:06:47,030
Yes I can.
136
00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:50,900
I threw them away because I
didn't feel like filing them.
137
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:51,943
Ow! Ow!
138
00:06:51,945 --> 00:06:53,512
I really should get rid of you,
139
00:06:53,514 --> 00:06:56,181
but some part of me enjoys
watching you suffer here.
140
00:06:56,183 --> 00:06:59,351
So I'm going to give you one
more chance.
141
00:07:01,087 --> 00:07:03,321
What kind of person
looks through the trash
142
00:07:03,323 --> 00:07:04,890
to check up on me?
143
00:07:04,892 --> 00:07:06,758
She's completely paranoid.
144
00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:08,860
Except that she actually
found something.
145
00:07:08,862 --> 00:07:09,761
By the way,
146
00:07:09,763 --> 00:07:12,230
you're welcome for lunch.
147
00:07:12,232 --> 00:07:12,964
(dan yawning)
I just don't
148
00:07:12,966 --> 00:07:15,333
understand why I'm so tired.
149
00:07:15,335 --> 00:07:19,037
I've been extremely careful to
do no actual work today.
150
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:22,140
It's been my experience that
trying to look busy is more
151
00:07:22,142 --> 00:07:24,910
exhausting than actual work.
152
00:07:24,912 --> 00:07:26,912
You might want to
try doing your job.
153
00:07:26,914 --> 00:07:28,914
And let our evil overlord win?
154
00:07:28,916 --> 00:07:31,750
Absolutely not.
155
00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:38,790
There's my All-Star.
156
00:07:38,790 --> 00:07:42,260
Do you need a refresher course
in how to use a phone?
157
00:07:42,262 --> 00:07:44,029
Jerk...
158
00:07:44,031 --> 00:07:45,430
You'd better start
making some calls, Dan.
159
00:07:45,432 --> 00:07:46,498
You heard her.
160
00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:51,730
(dumb customer on phone)
Hello.
161
00:07:51,730 --> 00:07:54,840
Hello, sir. You are past
due on your payment for
162
00:07:54,842 --> 00:07:56,374
"Rat Fancy" magazine.
163
00:07:56,376 --> 00:07:56,942
(dumb customer on phone)
So what?
164
00:07:56,944 --> 00:07:59,177
I ain't payin'.
165
00:07:59,179 --> 00:08:01,446
You go ahead and cancel
my prescription.
166
00:08:01,448 --> 00:08:04,483
Yes sir, but we still need
to collect payment on the
167
00:08:04,480 --> 00:08:05,830
issues you've received.
168
00:08:05,830 --> 00:08:06,860
(dumb customer on phone)
Nuh-uh.
169
00:08:06,860 --> 00:08:10,170
I said "CANCEL MY
PRESCRIPTION", you idiot!
170
00:08:10,170 --> 00:08:11,270
Subscription.
171
00:08:11,270 --> 00:08:13,420
(dumb customer on phone)
Don't you correctify me!
172
00:08:18,110 --> 00:08:18,950
(dumb customer on phone)
Hello?
173
00:08:18,950 --> 00:08:21,700
Listen up, brain trust.
I have your address.
174
00:08:21,702 --> 00:08:23,668
Do you understand
what that means?
175
00:08:23,670 --> 00:08:26,638
I know where you live.
Where you sleep.
176
00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:29,341
(completely losing it)
AND I WILL FIND YOU,
177
00:08:29,343 --> 00:08:31,776
YOU MOUTH BREATHER!
178
00:08:31,778 --> 00:08:32,811
AND WHEN I DO--
179
00:08:32,813 --> 00:08:36,515
(dan o.s.)
--I WILL RAM MY FIST DOWN
180
00:08:36,517 --> 00:08:40,485
YOUR INCOMPREHENSIBLY
STUPID THROAT!
181
00:08:40,487 --> 00:08:41,453
Dan!
182
00:08:41,455 --> 00:08:44,222
I WILL GRAB YOUR
LARGE INTESTINES,
183
00:08:44,224 --> 00:08:48,627
RIP THEM OUT OF YOUR BODY,
AND I WILL STRANGLE
184
00:08:48,629 --> 00:08:49,861
YOU WITH THEM!
185
00:08:53,466 --> 00:08:55,300
Uh, personal call.
186
00:08:55,302 --> 00:08:56,501
May I see you in my office?
187
00:08:59,839 --> 00:09:00,939
I know where this is going.
188
00:09:00,941 --> 00:09:02,941
Just fire me and
be done with it.
189
00:09:02,943 --> 00:09:04,342
I'm not firing you, Dan.
190
00:09:04,344 --> 00:09:05,977
Public flogging?
191
00:09:05,979 --> 00:09:08,079
I'm promoting you.
192
00:09:16,022 --> 00:09:17,122
I think you misspoke.
193
00:09:17,124 --> 00:09:18,823
You were telling
me I was fired?
194
00:09:18,825 --> 00:09:22,160
No, I said we're promoting you.
195
00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:24,596
What are you stupid?!
196
00:09:24,598 --> 00:09:26,665
I knew from day one
if I motivated you,
197
00:09:26,667 --> 00:09:29,467
you'd become our go to guy.
198
00:09:29,469 --> 00:09:31,403
If you didn't go on some kind
of workplace rampage and get
199
00:09:31,405 --> 00:09:33,338
hauled off to prison or
shot by the police.
200
00:09:33,340 --> 00:09:35,941
Risky little game you
were playing there.
201
00:09:35,943 --> 00:09:39,010
Dan, we need someone to get
tough with our clients.
202
00:09:39,012 --> 00:09:42,013
Someone to be "bad cop."
203
00:09:42,015 --> 00:09:43,949
I can teach you to direct
your rage. Harness it.
204
00:09:43,951 --> 00:09:46,618
You'll make more money and
have more fun. Interested?
205
00:09:48,854 --> 00:09:52,891
I will rip off your head and
I will - What was that?
206
00:09:52,893 --> 00:09:55,860
Stop crying, I can't
understand you.
207
00:09:55,862 --> 00:10:00,065
Okay. Put your mommy on.
208
00:10:00,067 --> 00:10:03,468
Hello? Yes we will
accept a credit card.
209
00:10:03,470 --> 00:10:04,803
Hold for our billing
department.
210
00:10:04,805 --> 00:10:06,571
That was great!
211
00:10:06,573 --> 00:10:09,140
You, my friend, have a
bright future ahead of you.
212
00:10:11,310 --> 00:10:13,020
I can't believe they gave
you your own office
213
00:10:13,020 --> 00:10:14,120
on your first day.
214
00:10:14,130 --> 00:10:17,180
Well, they can't have me
shrieking into the phone
215
00:10:17,184 --> 00:10:18,717
in the main cubicle
area, can they?
216
00:10:18,719 --> 00:10:21,953
Some of the things I say are
disturbing, even to me.
217
00:10:21,955 --> 00:10:23,421
Especially to me.
218
00:10:23,423 --> 00:10:26,825
Hah! You have a mini-fridge!
219
00:10:26,827 --> 00:10:29,194
Ah You are living the dream.
220
00:10:29,190 --> 00:10:30,910
All right, enough gawking. I
have a lot of work to do.
221
00:10:30,910 --> 00:10:31,540
But I was just--
222
00:10:31,540 --> 00:10:35,830
Back to the cubicle farm with
the rest of the underclass,
223
00:10:35,836 --> 00:10:36,635
you prole!
224
00:10:39,772 --> 00:10:41,206
So pick you up same
time tomorrow?
225
00:10:41,208 --> 00:10:43,942
You know, now that my
status has been elevated,
226
00:10:43,944 --> 00:10:46,978
I probably shouldn't
carpool with you anymore.
227
00:10:46,980 --> 00:10:50,782
Don't want to look like I'm
playing favorites, you know.
228
00:10:50,784 --> 00:10:52,517
Are you... serious?
229
00:10:52,519 --> 00:10:55,153
Yup. But don't worry.
230
00:10:55,155 --> 00:10:56,721
You can still drive me
around on weekends.
231
00:10:57,957 --> 00:10:59,524
Mr. Mumbles! I have
a surprise for you!
232
00:11:01,127 --> 00:11:06,197
You will notice that your
new cat food is not the
233
00:11:06,199 --> 00:11:08,433
generic store brand.
And my sliced turkey--
234
00:11:08,435 --> 00:11:11,603
--is within the
expiration date.
235
00:11:11,605 --> 00:11:15,974
Sure, it costs more, but we're
moving up in the world.
236
00:11:38,230 --> 00:11:42,567
Aw, nice. Hi, gorgeous.
237
00:11:42,569 --> 00:11:44,602
What do you want to do
for dinner tonight?
238
00:11:44,600 --> 00:11:46,960
Ah, the eternal question.
239
00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:47,900
I was thinking--
240
00:11:47,900 --> 00:11:49,470
(dan o.s.) Ahem.
241
00:11:49,770 --> 00:11:51,980
Oh, hi Dan. It's Elise.
242
00:11:51,980 --> 00:11:52,770
Hey!
243
00:11:52,770 --> 00:11:55,110
The rules about personal calls
are clearly spelled out in the
244
00:11:55,115 --> 00:11:57,382
employee handbook.
245
00:11:57,384 --> 00:11:59,551
You can have your phone back
at the end of the day.
246
00:11:59,550 --> 00:11:59,910
But--
247
00:11:59,910 --> 00:12:02,450
If you can't be trusted to
work in your cubicle...
248
00:12:03,689 --> 00:12:07,992
A comes first, then B.
Just like the song.
249
00:12:07,994 --> 00:12:09,427
Think you can figure it out?
250
00:12:09,429 --> 00:12:11,429
Jerk.
251
00:12:11,431 --> 00:12:12,063
(dan o.s.) I heard that!
252
00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:13,431
Good!
253
00:12:15,101 --> 00:12:16,501
Are you going to let
one of your underlings
254
00:12:16,503 --> 00:12:17,602
talk to you like that?
255
00:12:17,604 --> 00:12:19,671
Uh... No?
256
00:12:19,673 --> 00:12:22,474
Good. Because it's
a slippery slope.
257
00:12:22,476 --> 00:12:24,242
Trust me, bring the
hammer down before
258
00:12:24,244 --> 00:12:25,643
the other peons sense weakness.
259
00:12:25,645 --> 00:12:29,514
You wanted to see me, Dan?
260
00:12:29,516 --> 00:12:32,851
We would like to discuss your
attitude problem, Chris.
261
00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:35,053
MY attitude problem?
You've been--
262
00:12:35,055 --> 00:12:39,891
First, you parked your car over
the line in the garage today.
263
00:12:39,893 --> 00:12:41,893
Oh. Why didn't you
tell me this morning?
264
00:12:42,795 --> 00:12:43,695
I'll go move it now.
265
00:12:43,697 --> 00:12:46,197
Too late. I already
had you towed.
266
00:12:46,199 --> 00:12:47,265
You WHAT?!
267
00:12:47,267 --> 00:12:50,368
And I know your office
etiquette is sub-par,
268
00:12:50,370 --> 00:12:54,472
but calling your superior a
"Jerk" is not acceptable.
269
00:12:54,474 --> 00:12:56,908
Please treat me with the
deference my status as
270
00:12:56,910 --> 00:12:58,476
"Temp of the Week"
271
00:12:58,478 --> 00:13:00,979
demands, and call me sir.
272
00:13:00,981 --> 00:13:03,148
I have a couple of other
ideas of what to call you.
273
00:13:03,150 --> 00:13:04,048
You want to hear them?!
274
00:13:05,384 --> 00:13:06,184
(elise v.o.) Dan fired you?
275
00:13:06,186 --> 00:13:09,287
Ever since he got promoted, it's
like he's a different person.
276
00:13:09,280 --> 00:13:12,390
Well Ordinarily I'd
say any change in Dan
277
00:13:12,400 --> 00:13:13,360
is a good thing...
278
00:13:13,380 --> 00:13:15,760
He's like the boss's evil
apprentice.
279
00:13:15,762 --> 00:13:17,395
I'm sorry you got fired.
280
00:13:17,397 --> 00:13:20,331
But, silver lining: with
Dan working all the time,
281
00:13:20,333 --> 00:13:24,102
we can finally spend some time
together...interruption free.
282
00:13:24,104 --> 00:13:26,704
That does sound nice.
283
00:13:26,706 --> 00:13:29,174
But he's been unbearable.
284
00:13:29,176 --> 00:13:31,442
Today he even confiscated my --
285
00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:34,612
Oh rats, my phone's
still at work.
286
00:13:34,614 --> 00:13:36,481
I'll just run back real quick.
287
00:13:59,271 --> 00:14:04,209
Please tell me Dan didn't
set anything on fire.
288
00:14:28,968 --> 00:14:49,053
Aaahhh!
289
00:14:50,155 --> 00:14:51,723
Chris, what are you
doing here so late?
290
00:14:51,725 --> 00:14:54,525
Dan! Your boss...
she's...she's...she's...
291
00:14:54,527 --> 00:14:55,493
Yes?
292
00:14:55,495 --> 00:14:58,730
She's a demon! An actual demon!
293
00:14:58,732 --> 00:15:01,065
Yeah, I know.
294
00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:02,400
What do you mean you know!?
295
00:15:02,402 --> 00:15:04,402
Yeah, we had a great
talk about it.
296
00:15:04,404 --> 00:15:06,237
We have to destroy her!
297
00:15:06,239 --> 00:15:07,438
No way! She's a great boss.
298
00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:13,678
Did you know she's grooming
me for management?
299
00:15:13,680 --> 00:15:15,847
Demon management?!
300
00:15:15,849 --> 00:15:19,150
Let's just say I've finally
found a career path
301
00:15:19,152 --> 00:15:20,251
that's right for me.
302
00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:22,921
And it's all thanks
to you, buddy.
303
00:15:22,923 --> 00:15:24,589
Dan, you've done a lot
of questionable things,
304
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:26,424
but I never thought you were
in the service of actual,
305
00:15:26,426 --> 00:15:28,593
ultimate evil.
306
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:31,029
I know! I've been playing in the
minor leagues my whole life!
307
00:15:31,031 --> 00:15:33,064
But hey, I'll totally let you be
my Admin Assistant when I get
308
00:15:33,066 --> 00:15:37,769
promoted to full demon-hood.
309
00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:39,871
Aaaah!
310
00:15:39,873 --> 00:15:41,839
(boss o.s.) (slightly demonic)
Dan?
311
00:15:41,841 --> 00:15:43,007
Chris, wait!
312
00:15:50,616 --> 00:15:51,916
Chris knows too much.
313
00:15:51,918 --> 00:15:53,484
We have to destroy him.
314
00:15:53,486 --> 00:15:55,453
I was afraid you were
going to say that.
315
00:15:55,455 --> 00:15:58,323
Bring him back here.
We'll do it together.
316
00:15:58,325 --> 00:16:00,124
Team building exercise!
317
00:16:00,126 --> 00:16:01,592
Do we have to?
318
00:16:01,594 --> 00:16:04,595
I mean, I've known the guy
for a really long time.
319
00:16:04,597 --> 00:16:07,365
You can't just replace
good friends.
320
00:16:07,367 --> 00:16:10,702
How'd you like an expense
account and a company car?
321
00:16:10,704 --> 00:16:13,938
Well, I better get after him.
322
00:16:18,277 --> 00:16:21,179
Elise! You have to help me!
323
00:16:21,181 --> 00:16:23,548
My boss is a demon!
324
00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:26,784
That's... surprising.
325
00:16:26,786 --> 00:16:28,286
It gets worse!
326
00:16:28,288 --> 00:16:29,787
Dan has joined forces with her
327
00:16:29,789 --> 00:16:32,423
and wants to rise in
the ranks of evil.
328
00:16:32,425 --> 00:16:35,460
That I find considerably
less surprising.
329
00:16:35,462 --> 00:16:36,794
What do we do?
330
00:16:36,796 --> 00:16:38,062
I'm thinking we assemble
a strike team.
331
00:16:38,060 --> 00:16:40,830
We'll need a priest, a rabbi,
and the Dalai Lama...
332
00:16:40,830 --> 00:16:41,950
I'll be honest, Chris,
333
00:16:41,950 --> 00:16:45,670
demons are a little bit
outside my area of expertise.
334
00:16:45,672 --> 00:16:48,039
But I can make some calls in
the morning, ask around...
335
00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:49,273
In the morning?!
336
00:16:49,275 --> 00:16:51,009
What if they come after me?
337
00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:52,677
They saw you?
338
00:16:52,679 --> 00:16:54,579
Dan says once HE'S a demon,
339
00:16:54,581 --> 00:16:56,047
he'll make me his Admin
Assistant.
340
00:16:56,049 --> 00:16:57,815
Would you get benefits?
341
00:16:57,817 --> 00:16:59,117
Ah!
342
00:16:59,119 --> 00:17:01,419
I mean, that's terrible.
343
00:17:10,662 --> 00:17:12,196
Exorcist, exorcist, exorcist...
344
00:17:18,203 --> 00:17:21,773
Hello, you have reached
Falvey's Fiend-B-Gone.
345
00:17:21,775 --> 00:17:27,111
For English, Press 1...
For Latin, Press 2...
346
00:17:27,113 --> 00:17:28,012
MMppphh!
347
00:17:30,916 --> 00:17:34,352
You just had to go back for
your phone, didn't you?
348
00:17:34,354 --> 00:17:39,023
You don't have to do
this, Dan! Free will!
349
00:17:39,025 --> 00:17:40,858
I know exactly what
I have to do.
350
00:17:52,337 --> 00:17:53,471
Would you quit struggling?
351
00:17:53,473 --> 00:17:55,339
You're only making this
harder.
352
00:17:55,941 --> 00:18:00,778
What'ja bring me?
353
00:18:00,780 --> 00:18:09,520
Ow! Ow! Ow!
354
00:18:09,522 --> 00:18:14,959
Hot! Hothothothothot...
355
00:18:14,961 --> 00:18:18,296
That is awesome! Can you
teach me to do that?
356
00:18:18,290 --> 00:18:19,480
In time.
357
00:18:19,480 --> 00:18:22,960
You've done well, Dan.
You shall be rewarded.
358
00:18:22,969 --> 00:18:27,638
So nice to be
appreciated for once.
359
00:18:27,640 --> 00:18:30,641
You were gone so long, I
was wondering if you had
360
00:18:30,643 --> 00:18:33,444
second thoughts about
sacrificing your best friend.
361
00:18:33,446 --> 00:18:37,014
Of course not! I just had
to stop and get you this.
362
00:18:37,016 --> 00:18:39,917
Aw, a "World's Best Boss" mug!
363
00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:44,355
Yup. Filled with holy water.
364
00:18:44,357 --> 00:18:46,224
What?!
365
00:18:46,226 --> 00:18:47,225
(screaming)
366
00:18:47,227 --> 00:18:48,226
Ah! Ah!
367
00:18:55,868 --> 00:18:58,236
You okay, buddy?
368
00:18:58,238 --> 00:18:59,670
I thought you were going
to let her kill me!
369
00:18:59,672 --> 00:19:01,906
How could you think
that of me?!
370
00:19:01,908 --> 00:19:07,879
Well, you did kidnap me and
bring me to your demon boss!
371
00:19:07,881 --> 00:19:10,381
It had to look like I was
going along with it.
372
00:19:10,383 --> 00:19:13,017
Convincing, wasn't I?
373
00:19:13,019 --> 00:19:16,220
(boss o.s.)(full-on demonvoice)
I am very upset right now.
374
00:19:16,922 --> 00:19:19,090
Ahh! Oh no.
375
00:19:19,092 --> 00:19:21,325
Huh. I thought for sure
that would do it.
376
00:19:21,327 --> 00:19:24,061
Guess I needed more holy water.
377
00:19:24,063 --> 00:19:25,963
Please tell me you
have a Plan B.
378
00:19:25,965 --> 00:19:27,298
Uh...run?
379
00:19:33,939 --> 00:19:36,274
I had such high
hopes for you, Dan.
380
00:19:51,890 --> 00:19:54,258
Ahh! Do you have any
more holy water?
381
00:19:54,260 --> 00:19:56,527
No! That was all I made.
382
00:19:56,529 --> 00:20:01,165
Why didn't you-- wait,
you made it? How?
383
00:20:01,167 --> 00:20:04,735
They have instructions online.
384
00:20:04,737 --> 00:20:05,903
BOOM!
385
00:20:05,905 --> 00:20:08,239
Aah! So you could make more?
386
00:20:08,241 --> 00:20:10,274
Sure, if I had some water...
387
00:20:20,886 --> 00:20:24,422
You know, it didn't even
occur to me that you'd be
388
00:20:24,424 --> 00:20:28,259
stupid enough to hide
in your own cubicle.
389
00:20:28,261 --> 00:20:29,860
Aaaand... I'm toast.
390
00:20:44,243 --> 00:20:45,643
(dan o.s.) Sorry, boss...
391
00:20:47,045 --> 00:20:47,979
(screams)
392
00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:56,850
We're going to have
to let you go.
393
00:20:56,850 --> 00:20:58,450
I'll be back, Dan!
394
00:20:58,458 --> 00:21:01,025
You haven't seen the
last of me!
395
00:21:01,027 --> 00:21:04,362
And you can forget about
using me as a reference!
396
00:21:10,168 --> 00:21:11,269
Quitting time.
397
00:21:15,374 --> 00:21:17,775
On the bright side, looks like
we can sleep in tomorrow.
398
00:21:19,011 --> 00:21:22,913
Hey, thanks for not sacrificing
me to your demon overlord.
399
00:21:22,915 --> 00:21:24,582
No problem, buddy.
400
00:21:24,584 --> 00:21:26,651
I just wonder how I'm going
to make rent this month.
401
00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:30,087
You know, Dan, I think
I can spot you.
402
00:21:30,089 --> 00:21:31,389
It's the least I can do.
403
00:21:31,391 --> 00:21:34,191
It really is.
404
00:21:34,241 --> 00:21:38,791
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