Original subtitles

Okay, they're ready.

They're ready.

Put the music on.

Ladies and gentlemen,

ladies and gentlemen,

from the fall collection of

Alex Reed's closet,

sporting a classic suit

sporting a classic suit

with a what?

Oh, a striking tie

and a matching pocket square--

go, baby!

Go, baby!

Go, baby!

[Laughs]

Whether it is for a night

on the town or an after-work

on the town or an after-work

affair, my baby is ready

for any occasion.

For any occasion.

I'm ready, baby.

Yeah.

Okay, kaci.

Kaci.

And next, wearing a stunning,

and next, wearing a stunning,

stunning frock picked out

stunning frock picked out

by her daddy...

That's me.

Kaci Reynolds.

Sweetie, you need to strut.

Sweetie, you need to strut.

You need to, like, walk

like on a catwalk.

Okay, I would do anything

right now to make this stop.

What?

What?

No, kaci, you look beautiful,

honey.

Just straighten up your back

a little bit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Don't be such a party pooper.

You look so beautiful.

You look so beautiful.

You look so beautiful.

You guys are going to be so

great at the father-daughter

dance!

Dance!

Look at you!

Yes, we are.

You look gorgeous, kaci.

You look gorgeous, kaci.

Uh, yeah, she's all right.

But, dad--

Yes.

I have some thoughts

on your clothes.

Oh, gosh.

I could lend you

my three-fingered car ring

my three-fingered car ring

to set your whole look off.

Aw, well...

Good looking out, son.

Good looking out, son.

Hey, hey, hey,

what's wrong with my car ring?

Okay, okay.

I get it.

I get it.

It doesn't match your suit.

Okay.

Keenan, this doesn't

match anything.

You know what?

You know what?

I have some suggestions

for kaci's hair.

Oh, do you?

Okay, well, you have to raise

okay, well, you have to raise

your hand when you want

to speak.

I'm just kidding.

I'm just kidding.

Well, kaci, be careful with

Well, kaci, be careful with

that dress, all right?

Uh-huh.

What?

The dress cost more than

my suit, babe.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Kaci, you look beautiful!

Thank you.

Yes, she does.

And it was very worth it.

You guys are going to look

so gorgeous together.

Yes, thank you.

Yes, thank you.

I cannot believe how excited

I am about a dance.

Kaci's excited too.

She was actually worried.

She was actually worried.

She was worried that you weren't

gonna want to spend the night

dancing with some teenagers.

Well, I got to admit,

a high school dance is not

a high school dance is not

my first choice

for a Saturday night.

But kaci and I have been able to

spend some nice, quality time

spend some nice, quality time

together getting ready,

you know, planning everything.

You see the dress I bought her

and the shoes?

And the shoes.

And working on your funky

and working on your funky

fresh moves.

And the funky--funky fre--

woman, how old do you think

I am?

I am?

Old enough to know what

funky fresh moves are.

[Funky music]

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

Hey, hey.

I just hung up with the car

rental company, and for your

information, I'll have you know,

I just rented a--wait for it--

I just rented a--wait for it--

a Tesla to drive you and me

to the dance.

To the dance.

Wait. Are you serious?

Yes, I am.

Wait.

Do you know how cool we're gonna

look when we pull up at school

in an electric sports car?

Is that hug-worthy?

Is that hug-worthy?

Yes, it is; It is.

Thank you.

Is it possible to earn

negative cool points?

No one was talking to you,

man.

Man.

[Phone ringing]

Hello?

Hello?

Oh, hi, daddy.

Uh, sure.

No, no, no, that would be great.

No, no, no, that would be great.

Okay, I love you too.

That was my dad.

That was my dad.

He said he's flying in

tomorrow morning.

I thought Marcus was out

of the country?

The tour got cut short.

The tour got cut short.

And I already told him about

the dance tomorrow night,

and he says he has a surprise

for me.

Marcus is supposed to call us

before he comes to visit.

Before he comes to visit.

He knows the rules, kaci.

Mom, dad is a music manager.

You know, he goes to sleep

you know, he goes to sleep

in New York and wakes up

in Tokyo.

Yeah, all right, great.

Well, unless he wakes up

in Tokyo with his hands missing,

in Tokyo with his hands missing,

then he should have called me

or your father first.

Or your father first.

Feel the burn?

Got to work past that.

Got to work past that.

Uh, uh, oh, Alexis,

what are you doing?

Getting some sick lats.

Getting some sick lats.

What are lats?

Something you don't need to

be worried about.

Give me that before you

hurt yourself.

Okay, spot me.

Okay, spot me.

All right, drop 'em.

Thank you. Good job.

Are my lats sick yet?

Are my lats sick yet?

Wow, baby, your lats are

so sick, they need to be

so sick, they need to be

in the hospital.

Thanks.

[Doorbell rings]

Got it! I got it.

I got it. I got it.

I got it. I got it.

Okay.

Mm...

Hey!

Hi!

There's my baby girl.

There's my baby girl.

Hi, daddy.

Here, come in.

Ah, I guess I can't even call

you my baby girl anymore.

You're getting so tall.

You're getting so tall.

I know.

What's up, pops?

Whoa!

[Laughs]

Look at you.

Look at you.

Huh?

Getting all buff.

You must be doing those

exercises I taught you.

Gotta give the ladies

something to look at.

Something to look at.

Hmm, which isn't much.

All right, hey, Marcus.

How you doing?

Good to see you, Alex.

Good to see you, Alex.

Man, come on in.

Wow, look what the wind

blew in.

I'm sorry for the surprise,

but you know I got to take any

but you know I got to take any

opportunity to come see my kids.

Uh-huh.

Carla, you are looking great

as always.

As always.

Thank you very much.

Nice to see you.

What happened?

I thought you were on tour

with wu-tang.

Yeah, but the rza had

Yeah, but the rza had

to postpone.

Streisand called him in

to do a few tracks.

[Laughs]

Sorry.

What?

The rza is versatile.

Uh-huh.

Okay.

Anyway, my flight came

through New York, so I thought

I'd come by and spend some time

I'd come by and spend some time

with kaci and Keenan.

So, pops, did you bring us

any wu wear?

Oh, god, Keenan,

where are your manners?

Where are your manners?

[Chuckles]

You know I got you.

Bought a little something for

my baby girl's dance tonight.

My baby girl's dance tonight.

It's one of Rihanna's tour

dresses.

She sent it back because she

says it wasn't revealing enough.

What? Wait.

What? Wait.

I'm sorry.

This is actually one of

Rihanna's dresses?

[Both laugh]

Thank you so much, dad.

Thank you so much, dad.

Oh, my goodness.

That is a beautiful dress.

Oh, but wait a minute.

Wait.

Wait.

You're not gonna match Alex

anymore.

No, but it's okay. It's okay.

It's okay.

It's such a great dress.

Oh, my god, you got to wear

the dress.

The dress.

Wait.

You know, I don't--i don't have

to wear it to the dance.

No, no, no.

Of course.

Are you kidding?

That dress is beautiful.

That dress is beautiful.

You should wear it.

Yeah.

Thank you, daddy.

Okay, I'm gonna go tweet this,

'cause this is crazy.

Okay.

Okay.

[Laughs]

And you know I can't forget

about my main man.

Ah, ninja mercenaries 12?

Man, just what I wanted.

Marcus, Marcus, come on.

Remember, we had

the conversation.

The conversation.

We don't want the kids playing

the violent video games.

Right.

But it's not really

that violent compared to

that violent compared to

the really violent.

Yeah, well, we'll check it

out first.

Well, after you check out

Well, after you check out

the game, can I invite some of

my friends over to play?

Yeah, you can have a couple

friends over, but not Vaughn,

'cause didn't he get in trouble

'cause didn't he get in trouble

for taking kids' sats for them?

Yeah, but none of those kids

got into college.

[Sighs]

Come on, dad, you want

Come on, dad, you want

something to drink?

Yeah.

Sounds like your friend Vaughn

is none too bright.

Is none too bright.

Here we go.

Marcus is back.

He shows up unannounced,

he shows up unannounced,

brings video games

we haven't discussed.

He trumps the dress I bought

for kaci.

Mm, that too.

Mm, that too.

You know, I'm all for the man

trying to see his kids, but I

do not like the way

he does things.

No, I agree, sweetie.

No, I agree, sweetie.

I mean, so...

I guess it's time for another

conversation with Marcus.

Fair enough.

Fair enough.

Fair enough.

You want to play ninja

mercenaries 12?

Yeah.

Yeah.

Let's go.

[Laughs]

Man, I thought we were gonna

be playing ninja mercenaries.

Be playing ninja mercenaries.

Oh, stop crying about that.

Hey, Shawn, want to see me make

lamont hit that reset button?

Lamont hit that reset button?

Check this out.

Ah!

Made me fumble.

Ha.

Ha.

I knew you were gonna do

that weak move.

I'm the truth in this booth.

I'm the man with these hands.

I'm the man with these hands.

[Laughs]

Okay, I knew that was either

busta rhymes in my living room

or lamont.

How you doing?

How you doing?

Hi, Mrs. Reed.

Hi.

Mom, this is Shawn,

lamont's new neighbor.

He just moved in on his block.

How are you?

Nice to meet you, Shawn.

Nice to meet you, Shawn.

Nice to meet you too, ma'am.

It's okay.

Oh, my goodness!

Oh, my goodness!

Oh, my goodness, sweetheart,

you look amazing.

Stunning.

Absolutely stunning.

Absolutely stunning.

Kaci, you gonna win

with that ten.

With that ten.

It ought to be a crime to be

such a dime.

Let's go get something

to eat.

[Laughing]

[Laughing]

Come on, sweetie,

let me see you.

I want to see you--all of you.

I want to see all of you!

You like it?

You like it?

Oh, my god, I love it.

You--you look amazing.

Are you excited?

Yeah.

I mean, it was so nice of my dad

I mean, it was so nice of my dad

to bring me this dress.

Aw.

Ooh, la, la, la, la, la.

Ooh, la, la, la, la, la.

Well, oh--oh, my. Oh, my.

[Laughs]

Oh, you are gonna have

the hottest date at the dance.

Oh, well, thank you, babe.

Look at you guys.

Look at you guys.

Oh, my god.

Okay, I'm going to get

my camera.

You look--oh, you look

incredible.

I love it. I love it.

I love it. I love it.

Dad, you look really nice.

Oh, well, thank you, kaci.

And you look very beautiful

yourself.

Thank you.

[Doorbell rings]

Oh, oh, that's my dad.

Oh, oh, that's my dad.

He wanted to get a picture of me

in my dress.

Oh, okay.

Well, let's do it.

Hey, man.

All right.

Ah!

Aw, you are so grown up.

Aw, you are so grown up.

Where did my little girl go?

We were just getting out

of here.

Oh, I'm not gonna hold

you up.

You up.

I just came to get a picture.

Okay, I'm ready.

Oh, I didn't know you were

coming.

Ah, ha, I didn't want to miss

this moment.

Please.

Please.

Right here. Over here.

Uh-huh.

[Laughs]

Okay, over here. Over here.

Okay, over here. Over here.

Oh, god, you guys, this is

so great.

Ooh, look at that.

[Squeals]

Over here, over here.

Alex, would you--

Alex, would you--

Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely.

[Laughs]

I can take it.

I can take it.

I got it.

[Laughs]

Okay, let me get one

of just you, just you.

Come on, sweetie.

Come on, sweetie.

Okay, all right.

You look like a Princess.

Paparazzi people,

it's time to go.

One more, come on, baby.

One more, one more, one more.

[Grunts]

Oh, look at those guns.

Oh, look at those guns.

All right.

Mm...

Mm...

You guys are gonna have such

a great time.

Hey, thank you, man.

I appreciate it.

Wait. I have an idea.

Wait. I have an idea.

I mean, why don't you come

to the dance with us?

I mean, if that's okay with you.

Yeah--sure. Why not?

Yeah--sure. Why not?

No, no, no, no.

I don't want to intrude.

Plus, I have a flight to catch

plus, I have a flight to catch

tonight.

Well, can't you cancel it?

I mean, that way you could spend

more time with me and Keenan.

More time with me and Keenan.

Well, uh...

If it's okay with Carla

and Alex.

Sure, sure, yes.

Sure, sure, yes.

No problem.

Yeah.

Okay, all right.

Well, I'll get a clean shirt

and a jacket,

and we'll roll out.

And we'll roll out.

That was a good thing.

Good idea, sweetie.

Well, thank you, guys.

I'll be the only one with

two dates to the dance.

Two dates to the dance.

[Laughs]

But the Tesla's kind

of small.

How are we all gonna fit?

You and I will be fine.

I don't know about Marcus.

I don't know about Marcus.

Just playing.

[Laughs]

I'm gonna finish

getting ready.

Okay.

Okay.

Oh, god.

Come here.

Come here.

I love you so much.

You're the best.

I--i can't believe that dress

belonged to Rihanna.

It's so beautiful, kaci.

Well, thank you.

Well, thank you.

I just wanted kaci to look

like a superstar tonight.

Oh, but, man, she's already

a superstar.

A superstar.

Thanks, dad.

Just remember that when you see

my geometry grade.

Excuse me?

It's not a big--

St. augustine,

how's everybody doing out there?

[Cheers and applause]

All right, that's what i'm

all right, that's what i'm

talking about.

Right now I need the daughters

to grab their fathers and hit

the floor, because it's time for

the father-daughter dance-off!

The father-daughter dance-off!

All right, kaci, it's time.

It looks like Natalya's father

is ready for a challenge.

[Chuckles]

[Chuckles]

Oh...Um...

Hey, you know what?

Yo, Marcus, why don't you take

yo, Marcus, why don't you take

the first half of the dance,

then I'll cut in

for the second half?

No, it's okay.

I'm not even supposed

to be here.

I'm just gonna stand right here

I'm just gonna stand right here

and take pictures.

You sure?

Mm-hmm.

Okay.

Okay.

Well, after you, milady.

Wait.

I have an idea.

I have an idea.

I mean, why don't all three

of us dance?

Nothing would make me happier

than to share this moment with

both of my dads.

Both of my dads.

Are you sure?

Yeah.

Oh, but don't worry,

I'll be in the middle so it

doesn't look like you guys are

doesn't look like you guys are

dancing together.

That would be really weird.

All right, well, let's do it.

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

[Laughs]

[Cell phone ringing]

Oh, I'm sorry, sweetheart.

Oh, I'm sorry, sweetheart.

I got to take this call.

Wait. Not right now.

Daddy, we're--

Baby girl, give me a minute.

It's my fiancee.

It's my fiancee.

Wait. I'm sorry.

You have a fiancee?

[Stammers]

[Stammers]

Kaci...

Kaci...

[Sighs]

I didn't mean for it to come out

like that.

Yeah, well, with you, Marcus,

Yeah, well, with you, Marcus,

it always comes out like that.

Your friend Shawn is

Your friend Shawn is

so helpful.

He didn't let me do anything

by myself in the kitchen.

Dude, I don't know why you're

doing all that.

You're not getting

the biggest slice.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, Keenan.

Where are your manners?

Please, Shawn, go ahead.

Please, Shawn, go ahead.

After you.

Oh, don't mind if I do.

You're very kind.

You're very kind.

Mm...

Mom.

Hmm?

Mom.

Oh, oh, oh, I know, okay.

Okay.

I'm going.

I'm going.

I'm leaving.

Bye.

What are you looking at?

What are you looking at?

Mrs. Reed.

I just took a picture of her.

She is so fine.

Everybody knows that,

Everybody knows that,

but taking pictures?

What are guys doing?

Nothing.

Man, he's taking pictures

of your mom.

Of your mom.

What?

Hey, man, give me that phone.

Put your code in.

Put your code in.

You have a picture of my mom

eating pizza?

What is wrong with you?

Taking pictures of Mrs. Reed

taking pictures of Mrs. Reed

opening the door,

loading the dishwasher,

blowing her nose?

Come on, fool.

Come on, fool.

That ain't cool.

I can't help it.

She's hot.

She's hot.

I love her.

Ew!

Man, y'all have to go.

Get out of my house.

Man, I didn't know.

Why do I have to go?

Why do I have to go?

Because that rhyming is

annoying.

Bye.

But before you go, I'm deleting

those pictures.

Put your code in!

Put your code in!

Dude, he has your mom

in here too.

That's disgusting.

That's disgusting.

She's gonna be okay.

Her feelings are just hurt.

Her feelings are just hurt.

Well, they should be.

No one just Springs on their kid

they're getting married right in

the middle of a dance?

The middle of a dance?

But didn't he say that it

just slipped out or something?

It doesn't matter.

He should've found a better way

to tell her.

To tell her.

[Sighs]

Sweetie, we are stuck with him.

So we got to figure out the best

so we got to figure out the best

way to deal with it.

No.

Look, he's got to figure out

the best way to deal with it.

The best way to deal with it.

[Doorbell rings]

What's up, Alex?

Marcus, come on, man.

How many times are you gonna

keep coming to my house without

checking with me or Carla first?

Checking with me or Carla first?

My bad, but I took your

advice, and kaci's not returning

my phone call or text,

so I had to come over.

I need to talk to her before

I need to talk to her before

I get out of town.

Well, I can't guarantee she's

gonna talk to you, but you can

come in.

Come in.

Well, that's a chance

I'm willing to take.

You know, Marcus, I don't

know how you expect to smooth

know how you expect to smooth

this over.

You ruined a special night that

she'd been planning for weeks

just like that.

I know.

I know.

I wasn't thinking when I took

that call.

But I want to apologize to her.

Look, Marcus, I know you

don't do these things on

don't do these things on

purpose, but when you do,

you hurt these kids, and I'm the

one left picking up the pieces.

Now, come on, they are too young

now, come on, they are too young

to be going through these

changes you keep putting them

through.

'Sup, dads?

Hey, kee.

Where's your sister?

Oh, kaci's not coming

downstairs.

Downstairs.

She told me what you did

at the dance, and she's really

upset at you, man.

Trust me, you don't want to talk

to her without a police escort.

To her without a police escort.

And you?

Could have used some advance

notice.

But I'm cool with it.

I figure they'll be a lot of

stars at the wedding, and with

stars comes ladies.

Stars comes ladies.

And that's all you're

concerned about?

I'm 14, dad.

What do you want from me?

Look, Keenan, I am so sorry

Look, Keenan, I am so sorry

this trip didn't turn out

the way I hoped.

No worries.

No worries.

Kaci will come around.

See you later, man.

She's really not coming down,

She's really not coming down,

huh?

Doesn't look like it.

Please, tell her I'm sorry,

and I'll talk to her soon.

And I'll talk to her soon.

Well, if you think a message

from me is the best way to go,

I'll deliver it.

I'll deliver it.

You know, you're right.

You know, you're right.

It's my responsibility,

and I'll handle it.

I'll keep trying until

I get her.

I'll see you next time.

I'll see you next time.

And I'll remember to call first.

Hey, sweetie.

You okay?

You okay?

Yeah.

My dad called me from

the airport last night to talk

about what happened.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Yeah, I mean, he actually

took the time to talk about

everything that's going on

in his life.

In his life.

I mean, he never did that

before.

Did you...Say something?

Did you...Say something?

Well, let's just say

we had a talk.

But I am very glad that you

but I am very glad that you

accepted his phone call finally.

Yeah, well...

He, you know, he talked about

he, you know, he talked about

his fiancee, and she sounds

nice.

I'm glad that my dad finally

found somebody to put up with--

found somebody to put up with--

him.

[Chuckles]

You know, I'm really proud of

you, kaci.

You really are becoming a mature

you really are becoming a mature

young woman.

Well, I guess I was raised

right.

Thanks, dad.

I mean, I really appreciate

everything you've done for me

and Keenan.

And Keenan.

Couldn't have asked for

a better dad.

Well, thank you, kaci.

That means the world to me.

That means the world to me.

Good.

'Cause I was thinking about

getting my belly button pierced.

Getting my belly button pierced.

No.

I was just checking.

[Phone ringing]

Hello?

Oh, hi, Shawn.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Oh, I'm fine.

I'm--I'm a capricorn.

[Chuckles]

[Chuckles]

Why?

Oh--oh, okay.

Hold on a second.

Here's Keenan.

Here's Keenan.

It's your friend Shawn.

Beep!

Keenan, hanging up on a friend

Keenan, hanging up on a friend

is rude.

He's not my friend.

He's lamont's friend.

But he was your friend

yesterday.

What happened?

What happened?

He was disrespecting

my house.

Okay, um...

First of all, do you own

a house I don't know about?

A house I don't know about?

No.

And?

And what?

And what?

Well, you said "first of

all," implying that you had

something else to say.

Okay, Keenan, what is

the problem?

Why aren't you friends with him?

Why aren't you friends with him?

Okay, mom, when they were

over here playing video games

yesterday, Shawn was taking

yesterday, Shawn was taking

pictures of you eating,

walking, and blowing your nose.

He likes you.

He likes you.

He thinks you're hot.

What?

[Chuckles]

Wait. Really?

I mean, what?

I mean, what?

What?

The way Shawn was looking at

you was just wrong.

Okay...Oh, god.

Okay...Oh, god.

Keenan, listen, you are just

gonna have to get used to

gonna have to get used to

the fact that as long as

I'm alive and spanx exist,

I'm gonna be hot.

I'm gonna be hot.

That's disgusting.

No, no, no, say it with me:

"Mommy is hot."

No! No!

Mommy is hot.

No, mom, stop!

Mommy is a hottie patottie!

Mommy is a hottie patottie!

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