Original subtitles

Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education

Come on, Dex. Don't want to be late.

Dexter: Coming.

So, anyway, I was 3 under.

This is down at the pines.

Here we are, son. Welcome to the pro shop.

Hey, how's it going, guys?

You know, the am shop is back that way.

[Laughing]

What's that, guys?

Have a good game.

Hey! Yeah. You, too, fellas.

Good to see you.

[Coughs] Poo bird.

[Laughing]

Uh!

[Laughing]

Dad, do those guys think you're funny or something?

What's that? Oh, yeah.

We're always clowning around here. Ha ha!

Well, if you say so.

[Laughing]

Oh, there you are. Excuse me.

Yeah?

What can I do you for?

I'm gonna need a cart, please.

Oh, a cart, huh?

[Hiss]

[Hiss]

Sorry. We're all out.

Well, what about those ones outside?

Sir, are you calling me a liar?

What's the problem here, Billy?

No problem, sir. Everything's fine.

Yeah, well, let's just try

to keep the ruckus to a minimum, ok?

Sure, boss. Anything you say.

Thanks, Billy.

What, are you trying to get me fired?!

Well, I've never been one to cause a ruckus.

Come on, Dex.

Hey, wait.

I might be able to help you out.

See? You come to a place long enough, Dex,

and you start to earn a little respect.

Who are you paired up with?

Hey, guys.

[Laughing]

Ok, step aside, gents,

because no one is standing between me and that trophy.

It's tee time.

Ball, caddie.

Thanks.

Caddie, wash this ball, please.

It's filthy.

Thanks.

Hmm...

Darn these cheap tees!

Psst! Hey, dad, aren't you supposed to--

not now, caddie. I'm trying to concentrate.

Shh.

Here. Why don't you try this one?

It's fromAustralia.

Ooh! Thanks, mate.

[Laughing]

The shrimp's on the Barbie, fellas.

Let's get down to business.

Is, uh...He gonna kill us?

Club, caddie.

Thank you very--

uh, excuse me, caddie,

but we're a long way

from that hole over there.

We're gonna need something

a bit more substantial than wood.

We're gonna need cold steel!

Ah! Here we go.

But, dad, that's a putter.

[Ahem]

Caddie. Daddy.

He's steppin' up to the plate.

He's at the plate!

[Snoring]

And here's the wind-up!

Hey, b-b-b-b-b!

All right, that's a penalty.

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Whoo-hoo-hoo!

Wait, dad. He said "penalty."

No, he didn't, son.

He said, "now you're home free."

Um...

Just watch me, son. You might learn something.

Ok, dad.

Now watch me pick up that spare.

Man! That thing is out of the park!

[Laughing]

There's a stroke.

Yeah!

Dad, he said, "that's a stroke."

Son, please. He said, "now you're stoked."

Please, Grant this child brains.

I'm gonna kill that brother-in-law of yours

for not showing up today.

Dad: All right, pay attention, ladies.

I am gonna show you a little technique

I learned back in the war.

It's called... Phlargle-blarger.

Ooh...

Yah...

Yes, he is.

What?

Going to kill us.

Phlargle-blarger!

No, no, no. I didn't do that right at all.

It almost fell into this little hole right here.

All right, that's a do-over.

Dad, listen to me--

no more.

I don't want any more nonsense today

from anybody,

and that includes me.

Phlargle-blarger!

Ha ha ha ha.

Well, it's official.

Now you're gonna need a hole-in-one

on the next 17 holes

if you even want to get close

to winning that trophy.

[Laughing]

No one's ever done that except chief bearpart--

the horseshoe bend open of 1914,

and he was using balls made out of candle wax.

Nerd alert!

[Laughing]

So, it's a hole-in-one you want, is it?

Dad--

well, I'll give you a hole in 8!

Oh. Ha!

I got you this time!

Dad is going to lose unless I do something fast.

Wait a minute. Ooh. I hope it's still there.

Aha!

Excuse me, sir, but I need

to clean this ball.

Here is a fresh one,

clean as a whistle.

Nope, nothing wrong

with this ball.

Perfectly normal ball

right there.

[Ahem]

[Beeping]

Well, 18 more to go.

17, dad.

Yah...

[Beeping]

Well, one more hole, and I win the trophy.

Wait a second. I can't use this ball.

It's covered in filth.

No! Wait! Dad, don't!

Don't worry, caddie. I'll wash it.

Please! I have to tell you something!

Save it till after the game, son.

Can't you see I'm about to win?

[Crackling]

[Boom]

This ball seems to have run its course.

Well, I got another one.

Dad, wait!

[Cheering]

[Thud]

Now, what was that you wanted to tell me, son?

Uh...thanks for letting me be your caddie today.

You're welcome, son.

Announcer: And here they are,

the world's most daredevil group of daffy drivers

ever to whirl their wheels inDexter's wacky races,

competing for the title of the world's wackiest racer.

The cars are approaching the starting line.

At the front is that ingenious inventor Dexter

in the laboratory rat,

followed by number 2, the dark man special,

driven by mandark.

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!

[Tires screech]

Tagging alone, it's number 3 with mom and dad

in the family sedan...

Followed by number 4, the merry prankster,

driven by mandark's folks, ocean bird and wind bear.

Right on.

Hopping along, it's number 5, Dee Dee and koosie.

Next is number 6, the banana barge,

with monkey... And the lovely honeydew.

And finally, in their hemi-powered,

star-spangled superstock, it's the justice friends--

krunk, major glory, and val halen,

in the glory lorry.

And away they go,

inDexter's way-out wacky races!

Taking the lead, it's number 3, the family sedan,

in today's wacky race, which takes us

on a windy, wound-about way through wonderful wurwank--

Burbank.

In second place, the merry prankster,

followed by number 2, the lab rat, in third.

Coming up fast, it's number 2, the dark man special.

Hmm...i wonder

what that mischievous mandark is up to.

[Evil laughter]

Uh-oh. Look out, Dexter.

[Evil laughter]

[Clang]

Huh?

Well, look at that.

It looks like mandark's monster magnet

was mistakenly set to "moose."

Ha ha ha ha!

But Dexter's ahead of the game, maneuvering for the lead,

with the aid of the lab rat's latest technological advances.

Gee, Dexter, that's a pretty nifty looking device.

It is my latest foray

into transient motion graphics interface technology.

Using negative feedback synthesized digital simulator

nominal-space subsystem linear processing, i--

announcer: Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's very nice.

Number 5 is looking chipper.

How are you holding up, koos?

Oh, just...Fine.

Yay!

[Squawk]

Hey!

Meanwhile, the justice friends,

cruising along in the American muscle.

Excuse me, major, but that looks like a pretty powerful machine.

Right you are, my friend.

We're talking a fully blown

hemispherically fuel-injected 700 cubic inch,

nitro-methane powered beast.

Posi-rear with slick fifties.

And some pretty neat stickers, too.

So, bro, if it's so powerful,

why are we in last place?

Patience, my friend,

for the red, white, and blue will never come in...2.

Announcer: Speaking of 2, how's that lovely couple

in the family sedan holding up?

Honey, we better speed up.

It looks like the other racers are gaining on us.

Don't you worry, dear.

They won't even get close,

thanks to my special modifications,

like overinflated tires

and turbo-Max l.E.D.-Lit custom windshield wipers.

What do they do, dear?

Nothing.

But they sure look cool.

And most important,

I removed all extra weight from the vehicle,

including...

[Engine sputters and stops]

The gas tank?

Right.

Oh, right on, baby.

Now we're, like, number one.

Wind bear, isn't this whole competition thing

representative of the lame ideas

embraced by a society which chooses

neither to acknowledge or support

true individuality in its futile quest

for political uniformity?

Oh, no, man. Our groovy little excursion

is merely symbolic of our duty

as citizens of the united freaks of america

to use whatever available resources

that are, um... Available...

To aid in the ability to elude the clutches

of the ever-oppressive auto-cannibalistic

capitalistic regime,

which functions are the mere pawn

of its equally oppressive government

so that we, um... You know, that we...

Oh, now I forgot what I was saying, man.

Anyway...

Do you dig?

Hmm...no.

Check this out, man.

This state-of-the-art nitro booster,

when activated, will totally give us,

like, the boost we need to achieve

our ultimate journey, man.

Get your motor runnin'.

Beginning pursuit.

[Siren]

Aw, man. It's the heat.

Bummer.

Don't stress, Bess. I got it all dialed in.

[Siren]

I'll do the talking.

So...where's Mr. Wavy-gravy

off to in such a hurry?

Well, you see, like, we're having this race, dig?

Which I believe is part of our right

to life, Liberty, and the...

Purs...uh, the pursu... The presa...

Um, whatever. You dig?

Sir, ma'am, I need to ask all y'all

to step out of the vehicle.

Way to go.

Hey, it worked at Berkeley.

This isn't Berkeley. It's Burbank.

Announcer: Meanwhile, the race is getting close,

as our wacky team passes the halfway Mark.

Number one is still showing a strong lead,

followed by number 6 in second place,

with number 5 close behind.

In a steady fourth, number 2.

Next, number 7, and what's this?

Hey, it looks like mom and dad are back in the race.

And it looks like the race is narrowing...

Literally.

Mandark: Rats! I can't pass.

Wait. I know.

Announcer: Well, it looks like the dark man special

has a leg up on the competition,

landing in first place, spelling trouble for the others.

Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha!

Speaking of trouble,

let's check up on the merry prankster.

Policeman: So, what do we have here?

Oh, dude, that's my way-out nitro booster.

But just, like, make sure

you don't, like, turn the valve on.

Policeman: Stop this crazy thing!

Bummer.

What do we do now?

Wow. Far out, man.

I have an idea.

Announcer: Meanwhile, mandark is still in the lead

as we approach the tippenagogo-agogo tunnel.

Mandark: This is the perfect spot

to try out my...Top-secret plan.

Krunk afraid of the dark.

Oh, don't worry, big fella.

Lady Liberty's torch will guide us through.

And now...

That was weird.

What is that mandark up to?

Hmm...

Uh, like, you can open your eyes now.

Announcer: All of our racers have exited the tunnel,

and according to radar, are stopped.

No, our live camera shows them moving along at a crisp pace.

Well, I'll be.

Koosie, do you notice anything strange?

Like what, Dee Dee?

It feels like we've been

on this same stretch of road forever.

Look! There it is again.

There's what, Dee Dee?

That pile of rocks.

We keep passing it.

There it is again...

And again.

Now, now, Dee Dee. That's called a repeat pan,

first implemented by William Hannah

and Joseph barbera in 1947

to streamline production costs.

Well, I don't like it.

Announcer: And neither does Dexter.

Computer: Dexter, I am detecting

a negative-ion force field

in the direct vicinity.

Hmm...i got a funny feeling about this.

Computer, give me a location scan since 3 minutes ago.

I do not believe it!

Computer, give me ultraviolet scanner.

Ha ha! I knew it.

It appears as though we have been driving for miles,

but in actuality, we are still inside the tunnel.

Mandark trapped us in a virtual-reality force loop.

Computer, terminate force loop.

Yeah! We did it!

Announcer: Now all they have to do

is catch up to that shifty old mandark,

who's got an impressive lead.

But wait. It looks like the other wacky racers

are making a strong comeback

as we approach the final quarter.

Number 2, the dark man, still in the lead,

with the lab rat on his tail.

Number 5, Dee Dee and koosie, in a close third,

followed by the banana barge,

and coming up last, the glory lorry.

Major glory: Washington's wig!

It looks like we have to pull over.

[Siren]

Ha ha ha. Leave it to the conformists

to obey the law.

Hey, that's not the heat.

That's the competition.

Announcer: Now the other racers take off after mandark,

except for number 7, who seems to have stalled out.

Major glory, car go...

[Sputtering]

Yes, krunk, I know.

But I just put new points in it.

Now what are we gonna do?

There's only one thing we can do.

Announcer: It looks like

American muscle is back in the race.

When push comes to shove,

American ingenuity always steps up to the plate.

Major glory: You can say that again.

Faster! Faster! Faster! Faster! Faster! Faster!

Announcer: And as we come to the final leg of the race,

it looks like it's gonna be a close one.

They're all neck-and-neck, vying for that lead position.

Oh, boy, is this gonna be close!

We may need to have a photo finish,

and the winner is...

The policeman?

Let's go to the winner

and see if he has any words for us.

Why, yes. Yes, I do.

Get me out of here!

Announcer: And so ends another exciting episode

ofDexter's wacky races.

Good night, folks.

Enter at your own peril.

Past the vaulted door,

where impossible things may happen

that the world's never seen before.

♪ In Dexter's laboratory

♪ lives the smartest boy you've ever seen ♪

♪ but Dee Dee blows his experiments ♪

♪ to smithereens

♪ there is gloom and doom while things go boom ♪

♪ in Dexter's lab

captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education

captioned by the national captioning institute --www.Ncicap.Org--

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0