Original subtitles

Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education

[Bubbling]

Success!

Thank you. Thank you. And, of course,

my sincerest thanks to everyone

that made this project possible.

Thank you, beaker.

Thank you, clamp.

Thank you, mysterious chemicals.

Thank you, computer.

And last, but not least,

I would like to thankfire.

Ah, fire. Just think...

All of man's greatest advancements,

all of man's industrial accomplishments,

all our technological progress,

all stem from the discovery of fire.

[Sighs]

Oh, how wonderful it would be

to jump back in time

and meet the amazing caveman

that first harnessed the power of fire.

[Deep voice] Primal genius

[normal voice] Meets modern genius--

hanging out, comparing notes.

[Sighs]

Duh! Time machine!

[Buzzing]

[Growling]

[Growling]

[Growling]

[Groans]

[Growling]

[Sighs]

[Groans]

[Growls]

Oh.

Ah.

[Yells triumphantly]

[Mastodon trumpets]

Huh?

[Yells]

All: Oh.

Ooh. Ha.

[Chuckling]

[All muttering]

[Buzzing]

Salutations, Mr. Caveman. My name is Dexter from the future,

and I have come to personally thank you for discovering fire

and single-handedly inventing science.

So come with me. I invite you to catch a glimpse of tomorrow.

I am so very glad you could come.

There are so many things I want to show you,

all kinds of marvelous science and invention and tools and technologies,

all of which you sparked with your little flame, so I bid you welcome.

[Deep voice] Welcome to Dexter's laboratory.

[Beeping]

Well, what do you think?

Aah!

So much for the tour.

Computer, seal off all exits!

Deploy recon probe droids.

Begin infrared scanning.

[Buzzing]

Be gentle. He is a genius.

[Buzzing]

[Rumbling]

[Screams]

[Beeping]

Probe malfunction in sector 3?

Hmm.

[Tires screeching]

[Groans]

[Panting]

[Engine accelerating]

Oh, my goodness.

There you are. Thank heavens you're all right.

I was afraid you had gotten lost

or hurt yourself or something.

[Growls]

[Growling]

Aah!

Aah! Whoa! Aah!

Hiya, Dexter. Who's your friend?

He's a crazy, mad caveman!

Ooh!

Ooh.

Aa-aah!

Aa-aah. Ha ha.

[Imitates monkey]

[Speaking native language]

He's nice.

You mean, you can communicate with him?

Sure.

Of course. I should have guessed

your primitive linguistics would be compatible.

That means we can finish touring the lab.

That is, if you'll be my translator, Dee Dee.

Ok.

Marvelous. Let's begin.

The wonders of the modern scientific facility

are vast and all-encompassing.

Blah, blah. Blah, blah...

[Chuckles]

Many techniques and approaches are applied.

Here, in the alternative power center,

I have employed a series

of flux capacitors like this one

at every integral power junction,

thereby regulating the flow...

...and there you have it.

The pinnacle of scientific achiev-- huh?

Dexter: Dee Dee, what are you doing?

You haven't been translating a word I've said!

I just wanted to inspire

the world's first genius a little, you know.

Maybe he'd feel like inventing a wheel or something,

but instead, I find

you're rotting his mind with silly games.

But--

nope, this just isn't working.

I had better send you home now

before Dee Dee pollutes your intellect any further.

[Whirring]

Gee, Dexter, why you always got to ruin everybody's fun?

Me ruin?

Girl, you really burn me up!

[Whooshing]

[Announcer reading cartoon captions]

[Crash]

[Alarms sound]

[Sirens]

[Whoosh]

Dexter:C'est magnifique.

Boy, those major glory comics

really get me choked up!

I guess that means

I can call my comic book super entertainment 64 system a success.

Oh, what a surprise!

How is it that some people have the luck

of receiving super powers from some unfortunate lab explosion or something

and then get to save the world?

Meanwhile, I've had this lab for years and years,

and nothing cool has happened.

[Computer beeping]

I have to make

some super powers of my own.

Computer, show me the recipe for super speed.

Computer: Super speed formula displayed.

That's it!

To work sector 1!

Ok, super speed, come to papa.

[Boom]

[Skidding]

[Coughing]

Well, that wasn't too bad.

Kids, lunch is ready!

Last one there's a rotten egg! Last one there's a rotten egg!

We'll see who's the rotten egg.

And away we go!

[Dexter skidding]

Dexter's mother: Huh.

[Skidding]

Yay! I won!

[Dexter skidding]

Ha ha! You're a rotten egg!

[Dexter grumbling]

Super speed stinks.

Computer, show me an alternative.

Perhaps, a human insect mutation would be a better choice.

Hmm. I'll take it.

To work sector 2!

Ah, a perfect spidery specimen!

Add one radioactive beam.

That should do it.

Oh, my gosh! No!

Quick! Insect defibrillator!

Clear!

Nothing! Try again!

Clear!

Come on! Don't give up on me, you!

Clear!

Ah, whew.

[Nervously] A bit closer.

A bit closer.

Go on.

Hey, bite me.

Ah, you get back here!

Come here, you!

[Whistling]

Specimen!

Light beam!

Yes!

Ow.

[Groaning]

[Screaming]

Cool. Perhaps now I'll see what's on the tube.

Man: Oh, boy.

This one's going to be good. I got a special feeling.

Oh, just in time for the early movie.

I think I'll use my web powers to get a better view.

That's better.

Ah, this is the life.

Because of my buggy agility,

they'll never sense my presence.

Oh, honey, it's a little stuffy in here.

Could you turn on the fan?

You got it, little lady.

[Click]

[Actress screaming]

There's something in my hair.

Oh, gosh! It's hideous!

Get it out! Get it out!

I know what to do.

[Moaning]

Ah, it was just a bug.

[Panting]

Computer: Ok. Ok.

Try the power of underwater communication.

Do it up.

I am Dexter, super-powered boy genius.

Would you like to help me fight crime to save the world?

Uh, thanks, but I'm ok just exploring

the mysteries of the fake sunken ship.

Computer: Why not try the elemental force of rock?

Why not?

Computer: Ice is good.

Seems simple enough.

Ice up.

[Chattering]

Computer: Maybe the power over fire would be a better option.

Fire on!

[Screams]

Fire off! Fire off!

[Thud]

[Sizzling]

Why don't you try--

no. I'm sick of super powers.

I know when I am beaten,

and I'm happy just to be plain old genius boy.

Who wants to be a super hero anyway?

You can't drive a car, you have to wear stupid tights.

No. I'm not one.

Hi, Dexter!

Dee Dee, get out of my laboratory!

Ok. All right!

[Whooshing]

Crime fighting, here I come!

I, the evil mathemagician, shall capture all the children

and force them to do homework forever.

Announcer: Just then...

Major glory!

You asked for it!

Ah, ah, ah. No violence in schools.

Hmm, you're right, but there is one way to stop you!

No! Not justice fruit pies, a delicious treat you'd have to be crazy to hate.

Ooh, I give up.

Thanks to major glory.

[Muffled] Don't thank me. Thank fustice fruit fies.

What?

I said... [Mumbling] Oh!

[Laughing]

Computer, access X-ray.

[Buzzing]

Computer: Dexter, this martian sediment

contains a fossilized single-cell organism.

So, there was life on Mars,

and, perhaps,

that life has evolved into an intelligent life form,

which inhabits

the various regions of Mars today.

And I, Dexter, boy genius,

will be the first to make the discovery.

Computer: Dexter, your hypothesis

is purely speculative in theory.

In fact, the chances of intelligent life on the planet Mars are...

3,752,432 to 1.

Never tell me the odds.

[Fizzling]

Mmm, mmm, candy!

Mmm, yummy,

yum, yum, yum.

Computer: Cargo loading completed.

Computer, set coordinates for the Mars system.

Estimated time to launch: 3 seconds...

2, 1.

[Radar beeping]

Now to find some intelligent life.

[Chomping]

Mmm!

[Slurping]

Ooh, I don't feel so good.

[Radar beeping]

Hey, what's that over there?

Ooh, looks like a rock.

[Buzzing]

[Beeping]

Aliens.

Greetings. My name is--

hi, Dexter!

[Thud]

You know my name?

You must have

some kind of telepathic abilities.

He thinks I'm a martian.

[Laughing]

Yeet beep. Yat, dap, dup.

Hmm.

Ah!

[Clears throat]

[Slowly] I am...

From the planet--

[screams]

[Chattering]

[Ding]

That must have been

the martian way of saying hello.

Nettup.

On earth,

we greet one another by shaking hands.

Go on. Grab it.

That's it.

Almost.

There. You see, that wasn't so bad.

Now if you'll accompany me to the spacecraft.

[Squeaking]

Dee Dee: Whee!

[Crash]

My ship!

Ya, dup, deechoo.

My discovery.

Now to be famous in the eyes of science.

Come on. In you go!

Dexter: Fellow scientists,

behold the first intelligent life form

ever to be discovered from the planet Mars.

Scientists: Ooh.

Man: Amazing. Simply amazing.

Woman: Incredible. Well done, Dexter.

[Scientists applauding]

Congratulations.

His greatest discovery

in the field of science.

Better send it through the hydrowash

to ensure against any spread of foreign bacteria.

[Buzzing]

Thanks for the shower, guys.

Hey, wise guy, what are you trying to pull?

What?

Hmm.

You look just like my sister Dee Dee,

which means my sister is a martian!

Ee mork ork.

Ha ha. Now that explains everything.

Captioning made possible by Turner entertainment group and U.S. department of education

enter at your own peril

past the vaulted door

where impossible things may happen

that the world's never seen before.

♪ In Dexter's laboratory ♪

♪ lives the smartest boy

♪ you've ever seen

♪ but Dee Dee blows his experiments ♪

♪ to smithereens

♪ there is gloom and doom ♪

♪ while things go boom ♪

♪ in Dexter's lab

captioning performed by the national captioning institute, inc.

Public performance of captions prohibited without permission of national captioning institute

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