All language subtitles for Married... With Children - 06x10 - Kelly Does Hollywood Part 2.DVDRip SAiNTS.English.orig.Addic7ed.com
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Filipino
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hausa
Hawaiian
Hebrew
Hindi
Hmong
Hungarian
Icelandic
Igbo
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Javanese
Kannada
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latin
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Malayalam
Maltese
Maori
Marathi
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Persian
Polish
Portuguese
Punjabi
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Scots Gaelic
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sindhi
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Sundanese
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Tamil
Telugu
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
Welsh
Xhosa
Yiddish
Yoruba
Zulu
Odia (Oriya)
Kinyarwanda
Turkmen
Tatar
Uyghur
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:17,040 --> 00:01:18,712
Last week on Married With Children...
2
00:01:18,920 --> 00:01:22,356
...Kelly got her own talk show
on public-access TV.
3
00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:26,878
Who do you think
has the cutest butt?
4
00:01:27,120 --> 00:01:28,348
Mel Gibson.
5
00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:32,473
Lethal Weapon opening tomorrow!
6
00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:35,911
It was a success,
and everyone auditioned.
7
00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:57,072
Kelly said she'd think about it.
8
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:02,597
But she went it alone.
And that strategy paid off, because.
9
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:04,995
A real network wants
to put my show on primetime.
10
00:02:05,200 --> 00:02:06,553
- I'm going to Hollywood!
- What?
11
00:02:06,760 --> 00:02:07,749
- Hollywood?
- Yes! Yes!
12
00:02:07,960 --> 00:02:12,078
And now,
Married With Children continues.
13
00:02:13,200 --> 00:02:15,430
I can't believe
we're going to Hollywood.
14
00:02:15,640 --> 00:02:17,119
It's a dream come true.
15
00:02:17,360 --> 00:02:20,670
The place where any guy with a cheap
chain can call himself a producer...
16
00:02:20,880 --> 00:02:24,156
...to dumb babes getting off the bus
from Des Moines.
17
00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:29,678
Dad, your little boy's going home.
18
00:02:31,040 --> 00:02:35,716
I'm sure that Grumpy, Dopey, Sleepy
and Doc will be glad to have you back.
19
00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:39,350
Now, kids, before we go
to the land of broken dreams...
20
00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:43,678
...and cheap bikini love,
I want you to be prepared.
21
00:02:43,880 --> 00:02:47,793
Because Hollywood is not like
our quaint little hometown of Chicago.
22
00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:55,279
People in Hollywood are
always out for the quick buck.
23
00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:57,516
They're nothing
but a bunch of brownnosers.
24
00:02:57,720 --> 00:02:59,073
Now, I want you to remember...
25
00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:04,400
...that the only people who really care
about you as a person is your family.
26
00:03:05,440 --> 00:03:09,194
Hi, everyone. I hear you're going to
Hollywood and I wanted to come by...
27
00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:12,551
...and give you my best wishes.
And I don't want anything.
28
00:03:12,800 --> 00:03:15,268
Well, that's nice,
but you're blocking the door.
29
00:03:16,480 --> 00:03:20,155
Oh, really? Oh, well, I didn't mean to.
30
00:03:22,040 --> 00:03:23,314
Goodbye.
31
00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:27,475
Oh, but before you go,
there's just one thing I wanna say.
32
00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:34,029
I am willing to leave my husband
if you will just take me with you.
33
00:03:34,280 --> 00:03:35,508
I will do anything for you.
34
00:03:35,720 --> 00:03:41,989
I will procure for your little brother,
I will brush your father's teeth.
35
00:03:42,200 --> 00:03:43,792
Hey, I will even be your bodyguard.
36
00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:46,468
Let me prove myself
by killing someone.
37
00:03:46,680 --> 00:03:50,070
Just point to someone you don't like
and I'll happily kill him.
38
00:03:53,240 --> 00:03:56,630
- Kiss him goodbye.
- Now, Marcie, just a second, here!
39
00:03:56,880 --> 00:04:00,668
Now, why don't you just... out of here.
40
00:04:05,240 --> 00:04:07,071
I mean, we got a plane to catch.
41
00:04:07,320 --> 00:04:09,754
Oh, please, take me with you.
42
00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:14,471
I'm a pregnant banker jet-skiing
towards 40, for God's sake!
43
00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:17,069
I was voted Most Likely to Succeed
in high school...
44
00:04:17,280 --> 00:04:18,872
...and I have a reunion coming up.
45
00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:22,709
At least let me be able to say
that I slept with Chuck Woolery.
46
00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:27,277
Ease by her carefully, kids.
They say the mad have strength.
47
00:04:30,880 --> 00:04:32,916
Hey, hey, at least let me be
Slut of the Week.
48
00:04:33,120 --> 00:04:35,429
I'm already pregnant!
49
00:05:01,440 --> 00:05:05,069
Take a deep breath, kids,
and smell that show biz.
50
00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:11,152
I can't believe we're at the hub
of the NBS network.
51
00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:13,191
This is where it all happens.
52
00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:14,674
Did you see the bathroom?
53
00:05:14,880 --> 00:05:17,997
I tell you, I'm still giddy
with the thought that just possibly...
54
00:05:18,200 --> 00:05:21,351
...I might have sat on
the same toilet seat as Bob Hope.
55
00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:25,238
Yeah, Dad, but I'm sure Bob Hope
didn't walk out of the stall...
56
00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:29,353
...with his pants around his ankles
proudly singing "That's Entertainment."
57
00:05:30,320 --> 00:05:31,912
You loved it when you were 3.
58
00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:36,873
I can't believe we're actually here.
And it's all because of my little girl.
59
00:05:37,400 --> 00:05:40,756
It's times like this that I wish
I'd stayed home nights and studied...
60
00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:43,349
...so I could make something
of myself, like Bud.
61
00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:48,431
Okay, kids, enough fun.
62
00:05:48,640 --> 00:05:50,437
We don't wanna miss
the big picture here.
63
00:05:50,640 --> 00:05:51,914
We are in the loop.
64
00:05:52,120 --> 00:05:53,712
Just look at those walls.
65
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:56,229
Kids, we can be among the first...
66
00:05:56,440 --> 00:06:00,638
...to see the new, exciting shows
on the fall schedule.
67
00:06:00,840 --> 00:06:02,398
Gaze proudly, kids.
68
00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:03,828
Oh, just think.
69
00:06:04,040 --> 00:06:07,749
Someday my picture will be hanging
next to such exciting shows as...
70
00:06:08,480 --> 00:06:11,597
"Ellen and Her Dog"?
71
00:06:11,800 --> 00:06:15,315
"Spik e Le Bee,
New York City School Teacher"?
72
00:06:16,920 --> 00:06:19,957
"Art Allante, PI."
73
00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:23,878
"Black Cop, White Girl."
74
00:06:28,240 --> 00:06:30,754
"Me and the Shiksa"?
75
00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:36,157
"The Homeless Detective."
76
00:06:39,200 --> 00:06:40,474
Oh, come on.
77
00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:43,876
Daddy, do they
have to hang my picture here?
78
00:06:44,080 --> 00:06:46,116
- It's Gig!
- Gig, can I have your autograph?
79
00:06:46,320 --> 00:06:50,916
Oh, my God. It's Gig Fontaine,
star of Tugboat Danger.
80
00:06:51,160 --> 00:06:52,639
Gig, please, please.
81
00:06:52,840 --> 00:06:57,152
I love you. I love you all.
But I'll love you first.
82
00:06:57,400 --> 00:06:58,753
I can't believe this.
83
00:06:58,960 --> 00:07:01,269
- Give us a smile, Gig.
- Just an autograph, please?
84
00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:04,199
Gig! Gig!
85
00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:07,637
What's that guy got that I don't?
86
00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:10,673
Shall I start above
or below the waist?
87
00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:13,553
Daddy, did you see how
those people were surrounding him...
88
00:07:13,760 --> 00:07:16,877
...just so he'd sign his name?
Do you think that'll happen to me?
89
00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:20,995
Well, probably not until
you learn how to spell your name.
90
00:07:21,240 --> 00:07:23,117
Well, I have something to say.
91
00:07:23,320 --> 00:07:24,673
If I become rich and famous...
92
00:07:24,880 --> 00:07:27,440
...I am gonna share it
with everyone that I love.
93
00:07:27,640 --> 00:07:29,835
Oh, and you guys too.
94
00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:34,519
Daddy, I am gonna get you a car
with door handles and a gas cap.
95
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,517
And a rear-view mirror...
96
00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:39,837
...not just one of Mom's old compacts
glued to the window.
97
00:07:40,080 --> 00:07:43,789
- And windshield wipers?
- You got it, big guy.
98
00:07:44,800 --> 00:07:47,030
And I'm gonna get Mom
what she's always wanted.
99
00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,674
Maybe that young guy
down the block who paints houses.
100
00:07:52,200 --> 00:07:55,351
And, Bud, get me a Coke, will you?
101
00:07:57,520 --> 00:08:00,876
Hi, I'm Jeff Littlehead. Now...
102
00:08:02,920 --> 00:08:05,753
Which one of you is Kelly Bundy?
103
00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:07,595
That would be I.
104
00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:12,917
Welcome to NBS,
where we say quality counts.
105
00:08:13,120 --> 00:08:15,156
We don't believe it, but we say it.
106
00:08:17,120 --> 00:08:19,680
You reek of avocado.
107
00:08:19,880 --> 00:08:23,555
Now, be nice, Bud.
They eat vegetables in Hollywood.
108
00:08:23,760 --> 00:08:25,671
And we are a stranger in his land.
109
00:08:25,920 --> 00:08:27,797
Now, there are no strangers
here at NBS...
110
00:08:28,000 --> 00:08:31,959
...if you don't mind me kissing
a little heinie for a moment.
111
00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:34,151
We're like a big family.
That's what we are.
112
00:08:34,360 --> 00:08:37,989
A big, happy family. Living, loving,
nurturing and supporting our talent.
113
00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:40,236
Here we never forget your name.
114
00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:42,078
Mr. Littlehead?
115
00:08:42,640 --> 00:08:44,949
- Who are you?
- Rock Turboman.
116
00:08:45,200 --> 00:08:48,237
Oh, glad to meet you.
I'll have a hamburger.
117
00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:51,597
No, I'm the star of your new series,
Young Ben Franklin.
118
00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:54,957
Yes, yes, I know.
Well, what can I do for you?
119
00:08:55,200 --> 00:08:57,031
Well, I know the ratings
have been low...
120
00:08:57,240 --> 00:08:59,708
...but I'm kind of thinking
of buying a new house.
121
00:08:59,920 --> 00:09:02,434
You think I should?
We're not being cancelled, are we?
122
00:09:02,680 --> 00:09:05,148
Oh, son, son, damn the ratings.
We love the show.
123
00:09:05,360 --> 00:09:07,510
America loves the show.
It'll be on forever.
124
00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:09,153
You, you buy that house.
125
00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:12,238
- Oh, thank you. Thank you.
- All right. All right, Ben Franklin.
126
00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:15,910
Electricity! Bifocals! Kites!
127
00:09:16,120 --> 00:09:19,157
He's gone.
I cancelled him this morning.
128
00:09:19,960 --> 00:09:22,155
You'll have his time slot.
129
00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:25,040
Hey, Dad, are you thinking
what I'm thinking?
130
00:09:25,240 --> 00:09:28,516
- That he can get both of us chicks?
- Yeah.
131
00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:31,556
Well, are you ready to see your set?
132
00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:34,514
Lead on, Mr. Littlething.
133
00:09:37,040 --> 00:09:42,478
Well, it's Littlehead,
but, well, you can call me anything.
134
00:09:42,680 --> 00:09:46,229
Just don't call me late
to a Dick Chamberlain miniseries.
135
00:09:51,680 --> 00:09:53,910
Oh, Daddy, we're gonna
go look at my set.
136
00:09:54,120 --> 00:09:55,439
I really feel like a star.
137
00:09:55,680 --> 00:09:57,989
Pumpkin, to me
you've always been a star.
138
00:09:58,200 --> 00:10:01,988
Oh, please. Just the other day you
were saying when you were a boy...
139
00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:05,158
...you used to water things
smarter than her.
140
00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:08,915
Well, you said, "What's the difference
between Kelly Bundy and an elephant?
141
00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:12,396
One is grey, has four legs and a tail,
and the other's a moron."
142
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:16,278
- Well, you told me that joke about...
- Okay, now, time-out, guys.
143
00:10:16,480 --> 00:10:20,439
Let's not fight. This should be
a happy moment. Okay?
144
00:10:21,880 --> 00:10:24,599
I'd like my checks
sent to me directly.
145
00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:27,400
I'll deliver them personally.
146
00:10:31,920 --> 00:10:35,117
Right this way, Miss Bundy.
147
00:10:37,080 --> 00:10:39,548
Arigato, gentlemen.
148
00:10:42,080 --> 00:10:44,958
This, Miss Bundy, is all yours.
149
00:11:09,720 --> 00:11:11,517
Yes!
150
00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:28,956
Oh, God, I don't believe this.
I mean, all this for me.
151
00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:33,797
I just want you to know that if I become
a success, I will never change.
152
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:35,672
Great.
153
00:11:36,920 --> 00:11:39,957
Are you really the guy
in Home Alone?
154
00:11:46,120 --> 00:11:47,872
Yes!
155
00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:53,234
Now, listen, if you two lovely young
ladies would like to be in the sequel...
156
00:11:53,440 --> 00:11:56,193
...Home Alone With Sex Toy...
157
00:11:57,320 --> 00:12:00,278
...just write down your names
and numbers here.
158
00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:06,236
I also wrote down my special talents.
159
00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:14,396
There's five minutes to rehearsal,
Miss Bundy.
160
00:12:14,880 --> 00:12:17,075
Oh, God. Oh, God.
161
00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:20,473
- Daddy?
- Oh, just a second, pumpkin.
162
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:22,233
Now, Jeff, I've been thinking.
163
00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:26,479
Just in case this new fall season,
you know, shall we say, blows...
164
00:12:26,680 --> 00:12:29,274
...l've been fooling around
with some ideas for new shows.
165
00:12:29,480 --> 00:12:32,517
Let's run this up the flagpole,
see if it waves. Stay with me here.
166
00:12:32,720 --> 00:12:34,073
There's this mystic guy...
167
00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:37,317
...wandering across the West
in search of his long-lost brother.
168
00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:39,078
Now, instead of guns...
169
00:12:39,280 --> 00:12:40,679
Get this.
170
00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:44,759
- he's fitted with an assortment
of fighting footwear.
171
00:12:46,400 --> 00:12:48,755
It's called Kung Shoe.
172
00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:57,115
- Now, Daddy?
- Not quite yet, pumpkin.
173
00:12:57,320 --> 00:12:59,231
I think I got him hooked.
174
00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:00,953
Okay, here's another idea.
175
00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:03,833
Let's toss this in the oven,
see if it bakes.
176
00:13:04,920 --> 00:13:11,473
Now, there's a shoe salesman
in the 23rd century, called Shoe Trek.
177
00:13:15,760 --> 00:13:17,113
Okay, I got another idea.
178
00:13:17,320 --> 00:13:20,630
Let's toss this in the bed with Madonna
and see if she sleeps with it.
179
00:13:21,600 --> 00:13:24,353
Now, this has nothing
to do with shoes...
180
00:13:24,560 --> 00:13:27,950
...but it's a hot idea
and I'd like to be personally involved.
181
00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:30,276
It's called Breasts.
182
00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:33,671
I just don't feel it.
183
00:13:36,280 --> 00:13:38,555
What a surprise, huh?
184
00:13:39,560 --> 00:13:41,516
All right, pumpkin, I want a five.
185
00:13:41,920 --> 00:13:45,515
Daddy, I'm scared.
I mean, what if I'm not any good?
186
00:13:45,720 --> 00:13:47,438
What if my intellectual bons mots...
187
00:13:47,640 --> 00:13:51,633
...and witty little intersections
are only appreciated in Chicago?
188
00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:55,594
I mean, back there
I was a big fish in a small bottle...
189
00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:59,793
...but now I'm in Los Angeles,
the Big Apple.
190
00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:02,308
What if I stink?
191
00:14:02,720 --> 00:14:06,759
Pumpkin, I want you to have
as much confidence in yourself...
192
00:14:06,960 --> 00:14:08,837
...as I had in my own self.
193
00:14:09,040 --> 00:14:11,554
Of course, my present lack
of faith is understandable...
194
00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:15,036
...since your average parking meter
makes more a day than I do.
195
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:16,753
But don't you worry.
196
00:14:16,960 --> 00:14:21,272
You can be a huge success because
you have what every Bundy has:
197
00:14:21,480 --> 00:14:23,038
Cute.
198
00:14:23,480 --> 00:14:25,550
We're irresistible.
199
00:14:27,160 --> 00:14:29,310
So you can succeed at anything.
200
00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:32,074
- Because I'm special?
- No! Because it's show business.
201
00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:34,316
You don't need talent or brains.
202
00:14:36,080 --> 00:14:38,150
Thank you, Daddy.
203
00:14:40,040 --> 00:14:41,871
We're ready for rehearsal,
Miss Bundy.
204
00:14:42,320 --> 00:14:45,835
- Wish me luck.
- Pumpkin, I wish you more than luck.
205
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:49,794
I wish you satisfaction and success.
206
00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:55,880
Because if you are a success,
I'll be so rich...
207
00:14:56,080 --> 00:14:59,629
...l'll be able to hire somebody else to
put their hands down my pants for me.
208
00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:09,636
Rehearsal in three, two, one...
209
00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:12,638
Welcome to
Vital Social Issues 'N Stuff with Kelly.
210
00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:14,717
I'm Kelly.
211
00:15:15,960 --> 00:15:18,394
Okay, be cool. We're on TV.
212
00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:22,832
Now, as you know if you were watching
channel 99 in Chicago last week...
213
00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:25,156
...our topic was men's butts.
214
00:15:25,360 --> 00:15:28,989
Now, we all felt that we didn't
explore men's butts sufficiently.
215
00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:32,909
In fact, one butt
was left totally uncovered.
216
00:15:33,800 --> 00:15:35,199
So to make it up to him...
217
00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:39,313
...the Vital Social Issues 'N Stuff
with Kelly Butt of the Year is...
218
00:15:41,720 --> 00:15:43,392
...Jason Priestley.
219
00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:47,275
Beverly Hills, 90210!
220
00:15:49,240 --> 00:15:51,515
Two palms up.
221
00:16:01,240 --> 00:16:05,233
And if he is watching, we are staying
at the fabulous Motel Two...
222
00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:08,318
...on the corner of Ghetto and Gang.
223
00:16:08,920 --> 00:16:13,436
Oh, turn left at the hobo
who calls himself Moondoggie.
224
00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:17,349
And now, on to an issue and stuff
that really sticks in my drawer.
225
00:16:17,560 --> 00:16:19,312
Bad dates.
226
00:16:19,560 --> 00:16:22,597
Roberta, why don't you tell us
and the entire nation...
227
00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:26,429
...the story you told us after we all
swore that we would never tell anyone?
228
00:16:26,840 --> 00:16:28,717
Sure.
229
00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:32,674
Johnny DiBedetto.
He takes me to a movie...
230
00:16:32,880 --> 00:16:34,757
...and you know how he likes
to put his tongue in your ear?
231
00:16:35,000 --> 00:16:37,150
- Yeah.
- Yeah, that's right.
232
00:16:39,200 --> 00:16:41,919
Well, he goes at it,
and the next thing I know...
233
00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:45,032
...he sucked my earring
down his throat.
234
00:16:46,080 --> 00:16:48,150
Not the blue ones
with the chains that hang?
235
00:16:49,760 --> 00:16:53,912
He can't do anything right.
He once stuck his tongue in my eye.
236
00:16:54,720 --> 00:16:58,998
Me too. He swallowed my contacts.
237
00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:03,513
He missed my entire head
and got my dog, Wilbur.
238
00:17:04,080 --> 00:17:07,914
Well, girls, what we've learned here is
that if you ever go out with Johnny...
239
00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:12,830
...don't wear anything that'll fit down
his throat. You stink, Johnny.
240
00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:20,512
- He is kind of cute, though, isn't he?
- Yeah.
241
00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:23,792
Okay. Now I would like
to introduce our band:
242
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,355
Joanie and the Slashettes.
243
00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:30,439
Girls?
244
00:17:30,640 --> 00:17:32,995
Two, three, four...
245
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,077
Sex!
246
00:17:42,000 --> 00:17:43,956
Well, I'm jelly.
247
00:17:45,360 --> 00:17:49,433
We'll be right back with our resident
bad-perm victim, Jeannie.
248
00:17:53,920 --> 00:17:57,310
This week, Jeannie has agreed
to let us shave her head.
249
00:17:57,560 --> 00:18:00,393
Might as well. It's ruined.
250
00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:04,799
Cut!
251
00:18:06,160 --> 00:18:09,550
That was great. God, it was fabulous.
252
00:18:09,760 --> 00:18:13,070
It was now, brown cow.
253
00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:15,788
Thank you, Mr. Littlepants.
254
00:18:17,040 --> 00:18:19,315
And thank you for
letting me do my own vision.
255
00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:23,069
My own creation.
The fruit of my own loins.
256
00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:25,271
- You really liked it?
- Oh, it was great.
257
00:18:25,480 --> 00:18:28,233
You stepped up to the plate
in the bottom of the ninth...
258
00:18:28,440 --> 00:18:31,750
...with the bases loaded, trailing
4-1 in St. Louis on a hot afternoon...
259
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:34,394
...100 degrees,
120 on the natural turf.
260
00:18:34,600 --> 00:18:37,114
And the wind-up,
and here's the pitch. It's a hit!
261
00:18:37,320 --> 00:18:40,312
That ball's going back, back,
way back, to the back of the wall.
262
00:18:40,520 --> 00:18:44,638
Grand slam! And look!
Some lucky fan's got the ball right now.
263
00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:48,071
And he wants your autograph!
Where's your pen?
264
00:18:56,920 --> 00:18:59,593
Daddy, what the hell
is he talking about?
265
00:19:00,040 --> 00:19:02,918
Just smile at the suit, pumpkin.
266
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:07,549
What I'm saying is, we love what
you're doing. Don't change a thing.
267
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:12,276
But before you go on, we just have
a few tiny little suggestions.
268
00:19:16,760 --> 00:19:19,957
I can't believe they ruined
then cancelled my show.
269
00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:24,358
Now, pumpkin, they just used research
and testing to mould the show...
270
00:19:24,560 --> 00:19:27,074
...into something they felt
really related to the teens.
271
00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:29,396
As we shall see,
research is never wrong.
272
00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:36,358
And now, here's Kelly Bundy.
273
00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:41,270
Hi. Welcome to my show. I'm Kelly.
274
00:19:41,480 --> 00:19:46,031
Today we're gonna talk about
making our parents' lives easier.
275
00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:49,678
- Neat.
- Keen.
276
00:19:49,880 --> 00:19:51,757
Dy-no-mite.
277
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:54,912
You kids aren't just whistling Dixie.
278
00:19:55,120 --> 00:19:58,157
Now let's hear a number
from our band.
279
00:19:59,960 --> 00:20:02,428
Two, three, four...
280
00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:09,278
Milk.
281
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:14,831
Thank you, Joanie and the Hepcats.
282
00:20:15,040 --> 00:20:17,508
Now, let's talk seriously
for a moment.
283
00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:19,438
We all wanna make
our parents happy...
284
00:20:19,640 --> 00:20:22,393
...because they gave us
this precious gift of life.
285
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:25,034
Isn't that right,
fellow virgin teens just waiting...
286
00:20:25,240 --> 00:20:27,151
...for the right man to come along?
287
00:20:28,960 --> 00:20:31,315
- Neato.
- Right.
288
00:20:31,560 --> 00:20:36,475
We'll be right back with library books,
the perfect Friday-night date.
289
00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:37,954
Band?
290
00:20:44,280 --> 00:20:45,474
Book.
291
00:20:56,280 --> 00:21:00,273
- I didn't like my hair.
- Please.
292
00:21:00,480 --> 00:21:04,473
You know something?
There is a bright side to all of this.
293
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:08,878
- What's that, Daddy?
- It's that nothing bad happened to me.
294
00:21:09,880 --> 00:21:13,236
I mean, it's possible
that the Bundy cloud of failure...
295
00:21:13,440 --> 00:21:17,558
...passed through me onto my children,
as I only dared to dream.
296
00:21:18,080 --> 00:21:21,197
I mean, imagine,
nothing bad happened to me.
297
00:21:21,800 --> 00:21:25,190
Next week, NBS presents
a new, exciting miniseries.
298
00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,790
Joe Piscopo in Shoe Trek.
299
00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:34,193
The shoe sizes are down, captain.
300
00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:38,796
Mr. Sock, heels on stun.
301
00:21:39,000 --> 00:21:42,754
Well, that's it. From now on,
nothing but cable for me.
302
00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:45,952
Send money for the children.
303
00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:51,237
Loofa the wrinkles away
the Ernest Borgnine way.
304
00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:56,958
Hey, senior citizens,
are you losing your hearing?
305
00:21:57,400 --> 00:22:01,439
Are you man enough
for a penile implant?
24988
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.