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1
00:00:03,169 --> 00:00:05,341
(fire crackling)
2
00:00:05,383 --> 00:00:11,352
♪
3
00:00:11,394 --> 00:00:13,022
Over here.
4
00:00:13,064 --> 00:00:15,653
♪
5
00:00:15,695 --> 00:00:16,530
Leave it.
6
00:00:16,571 --> 00:00:18,199
Hey, just leave it!
7
00:00:18,283 --> 00:00:40,494
♪
8
00:00:40,536 --> 00:00:42,915
Behind the dumpster, quick!
9
00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:44,795
Get down, shh, shh.
10
00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:46,673
(dumpster rumbling)
11
00:00:46,798 --> 00:00:47,926
(children scream)
12
00:00:48,051 --> 00:00:49,261
Please, don't hurt them.
13
00:00:49,304 --> 00:00:51,642
(screaming)
14
00:00:51,682 --> 00:00:56,402
♪
15
00:00:56,442 --> 00:00:59,573
(gun charging)
16
00:00:59,658 --> 00:01:01,201
(laser blast)
17
00:01:01,243 --> 00:01:03,582
♪
18
00:01:03,624 --> 00:01:06,254
(flesh sizzling)
19
00:01:06,337 --> 00:01:14,728
♪
20
00:01:14,771 --> 00:01:17,777
Now that's what
I call a hole in one.
21
00:01:17,902 --> 00:01:19,531
(lasers whizzing)
22
00:01:19,614 --> 00:01:32,264
♪
23
00:01:32,390 --> 00:01:35,270
(popping and zapping)
24
00:01:35,353 --> 00:01:36,606
There's the shock.
25
00:01:36,647 --> 00:01:38,276
(heavy breathing)
26
00:01:38,402 --> 00:01:39,905
♪
27
00:01:40,030 --> 00:01:41,658
And awe.
28
00:01:41,741 --> 00:01:50,509
♪
29
00:01:50,551 --> 00:01:52,680
(explosion)
30
00:01:52,764 --> 00:01:56,813
♪
31
00:01:56,896 --> 00:01:59,652
Hey kid, I think
you dropped this.
32
00:01:59,694 --> 00:02:01,531
♪
33
00:02:01,572 --> 00:02:02,784
You're safe now.
34
00:02:02,909 --> 00:02:05,120
Can't say the same for
the rest of humanity.
35
00:02:05,246 --> 00:02:07,251
Who are you?
36
00:02:07,376 --> 00:02:10,383
‐I'm Future Man.
‐Joshy.
37
00:02:10,508 --> 00:02:13,639
‐No, I'm Future Man.
‐Joshy!
38
00:02:13,722 --> 00:02:16,645
‐Future Man.
‐Joshy?
39
00:02:16,728 --> 00:02:19,233
Joshy?
40
00:02:19,275 --> 00:02:20,360
Joshy!
41
00:02:23,032 --> 00:02:25,663
Joshy!
42
00:02:25,746 --> 00:02:28,042
Dad, you don't have
to wake me up, okay?
43
00:02:28,126 --> 00:02:29,378
I have an alarm clock.
44
00:02:29,420 --> 00:02:31,550
Yeah, but not one that
makes you pancakes.
45
00:02:31,675 --> 00:02:34,305
Come on, you little buddy boo.
46
00:02:34,389 --> 00:02:37,060
I'm an adult, you don't
have to make me pancakes!
47
00:02:39,188 --> 00:02:40,442
(joystick cracks)
48
00:02:42,447 --> 00:02:44,742
My joystick!
49
00:02:44,783 --> 00:02:49,293
♪
50
00:02:49,377 --> 00:02:50,545
(explosion)
51
00:02:55,055 --> 00:02:57,058
(door creaks)
52
00:02:57,141 --> 00:02:59,938
‐Yo!
‐Hey, Futterman!
53
00:03:00,022 --> 00:03:01,818
‐How you doing?
‐I'm doing good,
54
00:03:01,901 --> 00:03:03,530
uh, except I need
another joystick.
55
00:03:03,572 --> 00:03:04,824
Another one,
what happened?
56
00:03:04,949 --> 00:03:06,828
You spazz out
playing Biotic Wars?
57
00:03:06,912 --> 00:03:09,334
Smash your joystick...again?
58
00:03:09,459 --> 00:03:11,587
Why you still playing
that stupid game?
59
00:03:11,671 --> 00:03:12,799
I know why.
60
00:03:12,840 --> 00:03:15,596
Because he spanks it
to this one‐‐Tiger!
61
00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:17,349
That is not true, I do
not spank it to Tiger.
62
00:03:17,474 --> 00:03:18,936
Dude, you spank it
to Tiger so much,
63
00:03:18,977 --> 00:03:20,939
your right hand should
be called Siegfried, man.
64
00:03:20,980 --> 00:03:22,067
Bam, you like that?
65
00:03:22,109 --> 00:03:23,110
I've been working
on my slams.
66
00:03:23,235 --> 00:03:24,447
Look, don't worry about it.
67
00:03:24,489 --> 00:03:26,450
We all jerk it
to video game people.
68
00:03:26,575 --> 00:03:27,704
I mean, she's not my type.
69
00:03:27,829 --> 00:03:29,205
I prefer Ms. Pac‐Man.
70
00:03:29,288 --> 00:03:31,836
Ms. Pac‐Man is married
to Mr. Pac‐Man.
71
00:03:31,961 --> 00:03:33,841
No, because then
she would be called
72
00:03:33,966 --> 00:03:36,052
Mrs. Pac‐Man,
not Ms. Pac‐Man.
73
00:03:36,094 --> 00:03:38,307
This is essentially
Pac‐Man's daughter.
74
00:03:38,349 --> 00:03:39,561
I'm fucking Pac‐Man's daughter
75
00:03:39,602 --> 00:03:42,064
under Pac‐Man's roof and
she's gobbling my dick like
76
00:03:42,106 --> 00:03:43,192
homp, homp, homp.
77
00:03:43,234 --> 00:03:45,195
Me personally, I've always
wanted to fuck Luigi.
78
00:03:45,237 --> 00:03:46,365
I love Italian dick.
79
00:03:46,490 --> 00:03:48,746
I bet Luigi's dick,
the whole dick is hairy.
80
00:03:48,871 --> 00:03:49,872
The whole dick.
81
00:03:49,956 --> 00:03:52,336
He has a dragon
that shits eggs
82
00:03:52,377 --> 00:03:54,256
like a chicken,
that's fucking dope.
83
00:03:54,340 --> 00:03:58,097
Look, Luigi wouldn't last
one day in the Biotic Wars.
84
00:03:58,139 --> 00:04:01,020
And, by the way, think about
Super Mario Bros. as a whole.
85
00:04:01,145 --> 00:04:03,358
It's a ridiculous game,
it makes no sense at all.
86
00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:04,401
What do you mean,
what do you mean?
87
00:04:04,526 --> 00:04:05,612
What do you mean,
"What do you mean"?
88
00:04:05,653 --> 00:04:07,240
Bowser builds a castle,
he knows there's little
89
00:04:07,324 --> 00:04:08,826
Italian plumbers that
are trying to stop him,
90
00:04:08,868 --> 00:04:10,872
but yet he makes
these giant green pipes
91
00:04:10,997 --> 00:04:12,125
that lead right inside.
92
00:04:12,167 --> 00:04:14,045
‐That makes no sense.
‐No, 'cause it's destiny.
93
00:04:14,170 --> 00:04:15,256
‐Destiny?!
‐That's how you know
94
00:04:15,299 --> 00:04:17,134
it's meant to be,
he had big pipes.
95
00:04:17,177 --> 00:04:18,805
And the one thing
he didn't see coming
96
00:04:18,930 --> 00:04:21,435
was two Italian plumbers that
fit exactly in those pipes.
97
00:04:21,519 --> 00:04:23,189
Those games suck, come on!
98
00:04:23,271 --> 00:04:24,317
Your games suck.
99
00:04:24,442 --> 00:04:26,321
Yeah, your game is
literally unbeatable.
100
00:04:26,403 --> 00:04:28,199
That is why I play it,
101
00:04:28,324 --> 00:04:30,077
because it's unbeatable.
102
00:04:30,161 --> 00:04:31,038
Think about it.
103
00:04:31,079 --> 00:04:32,582
How many people
have beaten Halo?
104
00:04:32,707 --> 00:04:33,918
How many people have
beaten Call of Duty
105
00:04:33,961 --> 00:04:35,840
or BioShock?
106
00:04:35,923 --> 00:04:37,552
I play this game because
no one has beaten it.
107
00:04:37,593 --> 00:04:39,221
Why would I want to beat a
game that everyone can beat?
108
00:04:39,305 --> 00:04:40,598
There's nothing
special about that.
109
00:04:40,723 --> 00:04:41,560
That's a true truth.
110
00:04:41,600 --> 00:04:43,228
Okay, I don't
have time for this,
111
00:04:43,355 --> 00:04:44,314
I have to get to the lab.
112
00:04:44,356 --> 00:04:45,985
Yeah, have fun
saving the world.
113
00:04:46,110 --> 00:04:50,952
♪
114
00:04:51,077 --> 00:04:53,959
Earth 2162.
115
00:04:54,042 --> 00:04:57,173
The human race is on
the brink of extinction.
116
00:04:57,215 --> 00:05:00,471
The Biotics, a super
race immune to disease,
117
00:05:00,555 --> 00:05:02,100
have released
a deadly virus
118
00:05:02,182 --> 00:05:03,562
killing nearly
all of Earth's
119
00:05:03,603 --> 00:05:05,690
40 billion inhabitants.
120
00:05:05,733 --> 00:05:07,360
(clatter)
121
00:05:07,485 --> 00:05:12,454
♪
122
00:05:12,495 --> 00:05:13,372
Hey Carl.
123
00:05:13,497 --> 00:05:15,000
Hey, Josh, how are you?
124
00:05:15,125 --> 00:05:16,252
Living the dream.
125
00:05:16,338 --> 00:05:18,634
♪
126
00:05:18,716 --> 00:05:21,096
What's left of humanity
hangs on by a thread,
127
00:05:21,137 --> 00:05:24,728
defended by a small army
known as the Resistance.
128
00:05:24,771 --> 00:05:27,360
I'm Tiger, this is Wolf.
129
00:05:27,401 --> 00:05:28,612
You're our newest recruit.
130
00:05:28,653 --> 00:05:29,863
Come fight.
131
00:05:29,906 --> 00:05:31,742
Welcome to the Resistance.
132
00:05:31,826 --> 00:05:32,827
♪
133
00:05:32,870 --> 00:05:35,334
Would you like to load
previous game, Future Man?
134
00:05:35,375 --> 00:05:37,086
Yes, I would.
135
00:05:37,127 --> 00:05:39,007
Let's fuck this place up.
136
00:05:39,132 --> 00:05:41,387
Rip his fucking dick off!
137
00:05:41,471 --> 00:05:44,266
Weapon upgrade,
X28 Psychoblaster.
138
00:05:44,394 --> 00:05:46,230
Nice, X28 Psychoblaster.
139
00:05:46,271 --> 00:05:47,399
Enemy vehicle approaching.
140
00:05:47,524 --> 00:05:48,526
Use your subatomic
sensor mine.
141
00:05:48,651 --> 00:05:49,737
Thank you for that, Wolf.
142
00:05:49,778 --> 00:05:52,659
‐Blow 'em back to hell.
‐Yeah, hoo!
143
00:05:52,784 --> 00:05:55,163
Come on, come on,
come on, yes!
144
00:05:55,288 --> 00:05:57,168
‐I live for blood!
‐Hey, Josh.
145
00:05:57,293 --> 00:05:59,882
Hoo, how long have
you been in here, buddy?
146
00:05:59,923 --> 00:06:01,386
It smells bad.
147
00:06:01,427 --> 00:06:04,182
You know you're surrounded
by cleaning supplies, right?
148
00:06:04,307 --> 00:06:06,060
Yeah, yeah, no, I know,
I just‐‐I'm in the middle
149
00:06:06,185 --> 00:06:07,146
of something right now, man.
150
00:06:07,187 --> 00:06:08,189
Look, buddy, I hate
to tell you this,
151
00:06:08,315 --> 00:06:10,153
but you might have
an unhealthy obsession
152
00:06:10,194 --> 00:06:11,447
with this video game.
153
00:06:11,572 --> 00:06:12,867
It's not unhealthy.
154
00:06:12,908 --> 00:06:14,495
So that's not a water bottle
155
00:06:14,536 --> 00:06:16,915
filled with your piss so you
don't have to stop playing?
156
00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:18,879
No. No, it's‐‐it's‐‐
It's apple juice.
157
00:06:18,920 --> 00:06:21,050
‐Why don't you take a sip?
‐'Cause I'm not thirsty.
158
00:06:21,175 --> 00:06:22,802
You're so thirsty right now,
159
00:06:22,927 --> 00:06:24,807
‐and you love apple juice.
‐Not that much.
160
00:06:24,891 --> 00:06:26,810
It's your third
favorite juice.
161
00:06:26,894 --> 00:06:27,771
Not thirsty, dude.
162
00:06:27,812 --> 00:06:29,942
Then why you sweating right now?
163
00:06:30,026 --> 00:06:31,403
You parched,
you want a sip?
164
00:06:31,446 --> 00:06:32,322
Nope.
165
00:06:32,447 --> 00:06:33,949
'Cause it's piss.
166
00:06:34,033 --> 00:06:35,954
Anyway, what level are you on?
167
00:06:36,079 --> 00:06:37,917
‐Hoo, 83.
‐83?
168
00:06:37,957 --> 00:06:38,834
‐Yep, yep.
‐That's the one
169
00:06:38,959 --> 00:06:40,213
you always die on, right?
170
00:06:40,338 --> 00:06:41,925
It is, and every time
I come back with more
171
00:06:41,966 --> 00:06:43,177
and more weapons, however...
172
00:06:43,218 --> 00:06:44,846
I have never made it
this far with this many
173
00:06:44,930 --> 00:06:46,850
weapons in my arsenal.
174
00:06:46,935 --> 00:06:48,855
Get ready to witness history.
175
00:06:48,939 --> 00:06:50,191
♪
176
00:06:50,233 --> 00:06:54,115
‐Kill 'em all!
‐To the left, to the left!
177
00:06:54,156 --> 00:06:55,326
I'm dead.
178
00:06:55,409 --> 00:06:57,456
That was fast!
179
00:06:57,540 --> 00:06:58,917
So brutal.
180
00:06:58,959 --> 00:07:00,461
They took all your limbs.
181
00:07:00,545 --> 00:07:01,713
Yeah, they always do.
182
00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:03,593
Well, at least it helped
me take my mind off
183
00:07:03,677 --> 00:07:05,096
all the shits I have
to plunge for a while.
184
00:07:05,221 --> 00:07:06,682
I am so glad
you said that
185
00:07:06,723 --> 00:07:08,226
'cause I did not
have a graceful way
186
00:07:08,353 --> 00:07:10,940
to segue into this, um,
but there's actually
187
00:07:10,983 --> 00:07:13,446
more shits for you
to plunge, buddy.
188
00:07:13,487 --> 00:07:14,699
I'm sorry.
189
00:07:14,740 --> 00:07:17,454
It's okay, man,
it's not your fault.
190
00:07:17,495 --> 00:07:21,127
Well, actually,
one of 'em was.
191
00:07:21,211 --> 00:07:27,725
♪
192
00:07:27,766 --> 00:07:29,644
♪ Got a good thing ♪
193
00:07:29,728 --> 00:07:32,108
♪
194
00:07:32,149 --> 00:07:33,653
♪ Got a good thing ♪
195
00:07:33,778 --> 00:07:36,451
♪
196
00:07:36,492 --> 00:07:39,956
♪ Got a good thing going,
got a good thing going ♪♪
197
00:07:39,999 --> 00:07:41,961
If you were as good at
cleaning as you are at leering,
198
00:07:42,002 --> 00:07:43,965
you'd be a pretty
good janitor.
199
00:07:44,007 --> 00:07:45,218
But you aren't.
200
00:07:45,259 --> 00:07:47,639
You are a shitty janitor.
201
00:07:47,723 --> 00:07:49,894
Dr. Camillo, please,
just give me a break.
202
00:07:50,019 --> 00:07:53,149
Oh, we gave Dr. Yakamura
a break to his collar bone
203
00:07:53,233 --> 00:07:54,528
when he slipped
on your wet floor
204
00:07:54,653 --> 00:07:55,738
and broke all my samples.
205
00:07:55,781 --> 00:07:57,659
I'm really sorry, Stu.
206
00:07:57,784 --> 00:08:00,499
Sorry doesn't re‐swab
those urethras.
207
00:08:00,540 --> 00:08:03,420
Do you think I like
swabbing urethras?
208
00:08:04,632 --> 00:08:06,427
Guess it depends
on the urethra.
209
00:08:06,552 --> 00:08:08,180
Nope, they're all bad.
210
00:08:08,264 --> 00:08:09,557
But I swab them
all the same
211
00:08:09,684 --> 00:08:11,646
because it's my job,
which is actually
212
00:08:11,687 --> 00:08:12,898
really, really important,
213
00:08:12,939 --> 00:08:15,403
unlike your job, which
could be done by a Roomba.
214
00:08:15,444 --> 00:08:17,031
That's enough, Dr. Camillo.
215
00:08:17,072 --> 00:08:18,492
I'm sorry, Dr. Kronish.
216
00:08:18,535 --> 00:08:20,288
The custodial staff
doesn't work for you,
217
00:08:20,413 --> 00:08:22,165
they work for me,
as do you.
218
00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:23,420
And if you want
to keep working for me,
219
00:08:23,545 --> 00:08:25,005
I suggest less tongue‐lashing
220
00:08:25,047 --> 00:08:27,009
and more urethra‐swabbing.
221
00:08:27,050 --> 00:08:28,512
Now, off you go,
swab, swab.
222
00:08:28,637 --> 00:08:29,639
Right away, sir.
223
00:08:32,019 --> 00:08:33,648
Whoa, thank you.
224
00:08:33,773 --> 00:08:35,902
I'd fire that jackass,
but goddamn he knows
225
00:08:36,028 --> 00:08:38,032
his way around
a herpes culture.
226
00:08:40,787 --> 00:08:41,663
Sorry.
227
00:08:41,788 --> 00:08:43,918
Oh, no, no, no, go on.
228
00:08:44,001 --> 00:08:45,797
Go on, get a good look.
229
00:08:45,880 --> 00:08:48,510
It's what we're fighting here,
the good fight.
230
00:08:48,552 --> 00:08:51,057
Hey, you know what they say,
keep your friends close,
231
00:08:51,140 --> 00:08:54,188
‐but your enemies on your lip.
‐Hmmm.
232
00:08:54,272 --> 00:08:55,399
Nice one.
233
00:08:55,442 --> 00:08:57,321
I was looking for
a closer for my toast
234
00:08:57,446 --> 00:08:58,447
at the Christmas party.
235
00:08:58,572 --> 00:08:59,741
You mind if I use that?
236
00:08:59,783 --> 00:09:02,538
‐Oh, yeah, it's all you.
‐What's your name again?
237
00:09:02,663 --> 00:09:05,043
‐Uh, Futterman.
‐Futterman.
238
00:09:05,126 --> 00:09:06,422
Come take a walk with me.
239
00:09:08,049 --> 00:09:09,552
Now, they call it
herpes simplex,
240
00:09:09,636 --> 00:09:11,139
but there's nothing
simple about it.
241
00:09:11,181 --> 00:09:14,062
I have been studying this
virus for over 40 years
242
00:09:14,144 --> 00:09:15,899
seeking a cure.
243
00:09:15,941 --> 00:09:19,072
It's why I became
a scientist.
244
00:09:19,197 --> 00:09:21,201
Dr. Benson.
245
00:09:21,326 --> 00:09:23,414
When's the last time
this possum ejaculated?
246
00:09:23,456 --> 00:09:25,460
‐Three hours, sir.
‐Perfect.
247
00:09:25,543 --> 00:09:27,588
Now, what was
I talking about?
248
00:09:27,673 --> 00:09:30,928
‐Uh, herpes.
‐Oh, yes, of course.
249
00:09:30,971 --> 00:09:33,475
I'll never forget the
night I contracted it.
250
00:09:33,559 --> 00:09:36,356
It was the night
of the moon landing.
251
00:09:36,481 --> 00:09:40,114
There was a big party
at the Pi Pi Gamma house
252
00:09:40,197 --> 00:09:41,198
at Caltech.
253
00:09:41,325 --> 00:09:42,411
The night of the moon landing?
254
00:09:42,452 --> 00:09:44,080
‐Hmm.
‐That is an historic moment
255
00:09:44,205 --> 00:09:45,332
to contract herpes.
256
00:09:45,459 --> 00:09:47,421
Oh, you should've been there.
257
00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:48,840
Maybe you could've
warned me that beneath
258
00:09:48,965 --> 00:09:50,091
that cherry red lipstick,
259
00:09:50,176 --> 00:09:52,346
Barbarella had
an HSV‐1 outbreak.
260
00:09:52,431 --> 00:09:53,600
Couldn't see it.
261
00:09:53,682 --> 00:09:56,938
‐Look at this monstrosity.
‐Oh, no, it's not that bad.
262
00:09:56,980 --> 00:09:59,067
I mean, actually,
it's like some people
263
00:09:59,110 --> 00:10:00,489
look good with a bald head,
264
00:10:00,614 --> 00:10:02,743
and you look good
with a cold sore.
265
00:10:02,868 --> 00:10:05,624
So actually the way the
light's hitting it right now,
266
00:10:05,749 --> 00:10:06,875
it's kind of beautiful.
267
00:10:07,000 --> 00:10:09,756
One day, I'm gonna
find a cure
268
00:10:09,840 --> 00:10:11,134
for this hideous blemish.
269
00:10:11,259 --> 00:10:12,888
Just have to keep
trying new formulas.
270
00:10:13,013 --> 00:10:14,767
Well, it's like
Einstein said,
271
00:10:14,892 --> 00:10:17,270
"Insanity is doing the
same thing over and over
272
00:10:17,397 --> 00:10:19,400
expecting a different result."
273
00:10:19,485 --> 00:10:20,486
Thanks, Dr. Kronish.
274
00:10:20,528 --> 00:10:24,118
Oh, now, call me Elias.
275
00:10:24,201 --> 00:10:25,580
(chuckles)
276
00:10:25,621 --> 00:10:34,096
♪
277
00:10:34,138 --> 00:10:36,351
Janitor Futterman to
the executive restroom.
278
00:10:36,394 --> 00:10:39,524
You are needed in
the executive restroom.
279
00:10:39,607 --> 00:10:43,865
There is a...big problem.
280
00:10:46,871 --> 00:10:48,293
Josh, what's wrong?
281
00:10:48,375 --> 00:10:50,169
You barely touched
your salmon.
282
00:10:50,297 --> 00:10:52,801
Can...can I have it?
283
00:10:52,884 --> 00:10:54,261
Yeah.
284
00:10:59,315 --> 00:11:02,028
Did you guys ever
think that I'd be doing
285
00:11:02,068 --> 00:11:03,322
something more with my life?
286
00:11:03,447 --> 00:11:05,909
What are you
talking about, Joshy?
287
00:11:05,994 --> 00:11:08,791
You work for one of the top
sexual disease centers
288
00:11:08,875 --> 00:11:09,793
in the country!
289
00:11:09,918 --> 00:11:11,046
Every day you walk into work,
290
00:11:11,129 --> 00:11:12,423
you're curing disease.
291
00:11:12,548 --> 00:11:15,053
I mean, I'm not
curing disease.
292
00:11:15,136 --> 00:11:17,558
But you're cleaning up
after the people who are.
293
00:11:17,683 --> 00:11:19,812
Yeah, and literally
anybody could do that job.
294
00:11:19,937 --> 00:11:21,317
Well, if you don't like it,
you can always do
295
00:11:21,442 --> 00:11:23,321
something else,
you can do anything
296
00:11:23,403 --> 00:11:24,782
you set your mind to.
297
00:11:24,822 --> 00:11:26,076
We've always told you that.
298
00:11:26,158 --> 00:11:27,953
Yeah, you have,
but it's not true.
299
00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:29,917
I mean, considering
that I have a shitty job,
300
00:11:29,957 --> 00:11:31,336
and I still live at
home with my parents,
301
00:11:31,461 --> 00:11:32,673
and I didn't set
my mind to that.
302
00:11:32,713 --> 00:11:34,467
Okay, I'm gonna be
the bigger man here
303
00:11:34,551 --> 00:11:36,846
and not tell you how much
that emotionally winded me.
304
00:11:36,971 --> 00:11:38,850
I know, I'm sorry,
I didn't mean it like that.
305
00:11:38,975 --> 00:11:39,977
And I instantly forgive you,
306
00:11:40,062 --> 00:11:41,230
that's how family works.
307
00:11:41,356 --> 00:11:42,734
And there's nothing
weird about living
308
00:11:42,817 --> 00:11:43,695
in your childhood home.
309
00:11:43,735 --> 00:11:44,863
This is my childhood home,
310
00:11:44,988 --> 00:11:46,533
and I live here.
311
00:11:46,575 --> 00:11:48,161
This is a Futterman house.
312
00:11:48,202 --> 00:11:50,039
I was conceived right
upstairs in the same room
313
00:11:50,081 --> 00:11:51,209
where I sleep
with your mother.
314
00:11:51,293 --> 00:11:52,671
The same room you
were conceived in.
315
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:53,840
Gross, Dad, come on.
316
00:11:53,965 --> 00:11:56,052
And one day, God willing,
you'll conceive your own
317
00:11:56,094 --> 00:11:57,722
little Futterman
in that same room.
318
00:11:57,806 --> 00:11:59,976
You should be encouraging
me to get out of the house!
319
00:12:00,059 --> 00:12:01,104
But we don't want
you to leave.
320
00:12:01,187 --> 00:12:02,732
What about your video game?
321
00:12:02,816 --> 00:12:03,985
You're the best at it, right?
322
00:12:04,110 --> 00:12:05,864
Doesn't that make
you feel special?
323
00:12:05,989 --> 00:12:07,240
It's a video game.
324
00:12:07,325 --> 00:12:08,577
It's not real,
it's just an escape.
325
00:12:08,619 --> 00:12:11,081
I'm not helping anybody
by playing video games.
326
00:12:13,253 --> 00:12:17,260
All right, I'm gonna
go play video games.
327
00:12:17,386 --> 00:12:19,390
Break their bodies!
328
00:12:19,515 --> 00:12:22,229
That's a clean break,
double points.
329
00:12:22,270 --> 00:12:25,152
Make it rain blood!
330
00:12:25,235 --> 00:12:26,529
‐Yes!
‐Level completed.
331
00:12:26,654 --> 00:12:28,743
Yes, yes, okay.
332
00:12:30,245 --> 00:12:33,753
Here we are, again.
333
00:12:33,836 --> 00:12:36,256
Level 83.
334
00:12:36,383 --> 00:12:39,263
Every time I go in
there guns blazing,
335
00:12:39,389 --> 00:12:40,892
and every time I die.
336
00:12:40,975 --> 00:12:42,770
I can't keep doing
the same thing again and again
337
00:12:42,895 --> 00:12:45,777
expecting different results.
338
00:12:45,860 --> 00:12:47,614
I gotta try
something different.
339
00:12:47,655 --> 00:12:56,798
♪
340
00:12:56,923 --> 00:12:59,052
Unequip all gear.
341
00:12:59,177 --> 00:13:05,692
♪
342
00:13:05,817 --> 00:13:07,068
Go, go, go!
343
00:13:07,152 --> 00:13:11,662
♪
344
00:13:11,787 --> 00:13:12,621
Oh, shit.
345
00:13:12,663 --> 00:13:14,668
Self‐destruct
sequence activated.
346
00:13:14,793 --> 00:13:16,044
‐Oh my God.
‐Five.
347
00:13:16,169 --> 00:13:17,548
‐Go, go, go!
‐Four.
348
00:13:17,673 --> 00:13:18,551
‐Oh, my God, go!
‐Three.
349
00:13:18,634 --> 00:13:19,552
‐Go, go, go, go, go!
‐Two.
350
00:13:19,635 --> 00:13:20,929
Run, you little fucker, run!
351
00:13:21,014 --> 00:13:22,433
One.
352
00:13:22,517 --> 00:13:28,068
♪
353
00:13:28,193 --> 00:13:29,322
Congratulations.
354
00:13:29,405 --> 00:13:31,200
You have defeated
all of the Biotics
355
00:13:31,326 --> 00:13:32,703
and saved humanity.
356
00:13:32,787 --> 00:13:35,918
You are the savior.
357
00:13:35,960 --> 00:13:38,341
Woo‐hoo‐hoo‐hoo‐hoo!
358
00:13:38,466 --> 00:13:40,217
Hey, guys!
359
00:13:40,302 --> 00:13:42,307
Guess what I did?
360
00:13:44,352 --> 00:13:45,730
Hello?
361
00:13:53,077 --> 00:13:56,918
‐Out to get snacks.
‐And explore!
362
00:13:58,212 --> 00:13:59,548
(sighs)
363
00:14:03,682 --> 00:14:06,355
All right, Siegfried,
you and me, pal.
364
00:14:09,235 --> 00:14:39,336
♪
365
00:14:39,379 --> 00:14:40,881
Hey, Tiger.
366
00:14:41,006 --> 00:14:44,013
What are you doing
sniffing around these parts?
367
00:14:44,138 --> 00:14:46,851
Maybe it's because
I'm in heat.
368
00:14:46,894 --> 00:14:50,232
Heh, well then you're
in the right place
369
00:14:50,274 --> 00:14:51,861
'cause I'm in heat also.
370
00:14:51,903 --> 00:14:53,030
♪
371
00:14:53,155 --> 00:14:56,663
Although, technically,
male cats don't‐‐
372
00:14:56,746 --> 00:14:58,165
Fuck it, it doesn't matter.
373
00:14:58,292 --> 00:14:59,753
Doesn't fucking matter.
374
00:14:59,794 --> 00:15:11,943
♪
375
00:15:12,068 --> 00:15:13,322
Future Man.
376
00:15:13,447 --> 00:15:15,368
♪
377
00:15:15,408 --> 00:15:17,287
The fuck?
378
00:15:17,371 --> 00:15:19,292
Oh, I'm hit!
379
00:15:19,417 --> 00:15:20,544
What the fuck?!
380
00:15:20,628 --> 00:15:23,006
(clatter)
381
00:15:23,048 --> 00:15:24,760
What are you doing here,
who are you people?
382
00:15:24,802 --> 00:15:27,014
I'm Tiger, this is Wolf.
383
00:15:27,057 --> 00:15:30,313
We've come back
from the year 2162.
384
00:15:30,398 --> 00:15:32,777
You're gonna help us
save the world.
385
00:15:35,700 --> 00:15:36,826
No, no, get out of here!
386
00:15:36,909 --> 00:15:38,037
What, do you expect me
to believe you guys
387
00:15:38,078 --> 00:15:39,456
are characters
from my video game?
388
00:15:39,582 --> 00:15:41,544
It's more than just a game!
389
00:15:41,586 --> 00:15:43,465
God dammit, it's all over me!
390
00:15:43,548 --> 00:15:44,592
Relax.
391
00:15:44,676 --> 00:15:45,970
Wolf, it's just a little cum.
392
00:15:46,095 --> 00:15:48,350
‐It's a lot of cum!
‐Wolf!
393
00:15:48,433 --> 00:15:49,602
Listen carefully.
394
00:15:49,686 --> 00:15:51,981
Everything that happens
in the Biotic Wars is real.
395
00:15:52,065 --> 00:15:55,364
The Biotics,
the wars, everything.
396
00:15:55,447 --> 00:15:56,908
The game is a recruitment
and training tool
397
00:15:56,950 --> 00:15:59,038
sent back in time
to find the one person
398
00:15:59,078 --> 00:16:01,208
with the skills
to save us.
399
00:16:01,293 --> 00:16:02,544
A savior.
400
00:16:02,586 --> 00:16:04,215
♪
401
00:16:04,341 --> 00:16:06,427
It's you.
402
00:16:06,470 --> 00:16:09,725
You're the first and only person
to have beaten the game.
403
00:16:09,808 --> 00:16:19,955
♪
404
00:16:19,995 --> 00:16:21,875
That's The Last Starfighter.
405
00:16:21,958 --> 00:16:24,129
It's the exact same
plot as the movie.
406
00:16:24,254 --> 00:16:25,256
What's a movie?
407
00:16:25,341 --> 00:16:26,884
Okay, who put
you up to this?
408
00:16:27,009 --> 00:16:28,096
The guys in the
video game store?
409
00:16:28,136 --> 00:16:29,097
Such dicks.
410
00:16:29,139 --> 00:16:30,600
Is this part of your
arsenal of weaponry?
411
00:16:30,643 --> 00:16:31,519
No, no, please don't.
412
00:16:31,644 --> 00:16:33,524
That's a signed
authen‐‐Oh, my God!
413
00:16:33,606 --> 00:16:35,235
I paid my only
bitcoin for that!
414
00:16:35,277 --> 00:16:36,654
Okay, listen, listen!
415
00:16:36,738 --> 00:16:38,533
I know this is a lot
for you to digest,
416
00:16:38,616 --> 00:16:39,702
but the clock is ticking
417
00:16:39,744 --> 00:16:41,246
and we have to do this.
418
00:16:41,373 --> 00:16:43,125
Do what?
419
00:16:43,209 --> 00:16:45,505
‐We're going to '69.
‐Beg your pardon?
420
00:16:45,588 --> 00:16:47,384
I said we're going to '69.
421
00:16:47,509 --> 00:16:49,889
Uh, you and me are
gonna 69 right now?
422
00:16:50,014 --> 00:16:52,602
‐Yes, are you ready?
‐Okay.
423
00:16:52,644 --> 00:16:54,606
Only, what's his
deal in all this?
424
00:16:54,649 --> 00:16:56,403
Is he gonna watch or...
425
00:16:56,485 --> 00:16:58,365
No, I'm going to
'69 with you too,
426
00:16:58,407 --> 00:17:00,118
make sure you
don't fuck it up.
427
00:17:00,159 --> 00:17:01,663
No, he's right, we can't
do this without him.
428
00:17:01,705 --> 00:17:02,831
What the fuck are
you talking about?
429
00:17:02,956 --> 00:17:04,836
Going back in time to 1969
430
00:17:04,961 --> 00:17:06,798
to save the world.
431
00:17:06,839 --> 00:17:08,344
Oh.
432
00:17:08,426 --> 00:17:10,931
The year.
433
00:17:10,972 --> 00:17:13,102
(whirring)
434
00:17:13,185 --> 00:17:14,355
What's that supposed to be?
435
00:17:14,480 --> 00:17:16,232
It's a TTD,
time travel device.
436
00:17:16,359 --> 00:17:17,987
That's a stupid name,
it looks like a fucking iPad.
437
00:17:18,112 --> 00:17:19,740
Don't fucking touch it!
438
00:17:19,782 --> 00:17:22,704
Do you know how many soldiers
we lost stealing this?
439
00:17:22,788 --> 00:17:23,707
Good men!
440
00:17:23,832 --> 00:17:25,419
Better fucking
men than you.
441
00:17:25,461 --> 00:17:26,337
Wolf!
442
00:17:26,462 --> 00:17:28,717
‐Stop it, we need him.
‐Do we?
443
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:31,347
Are we really gonna waste
a leap on this fucking guy?
444
00:17:31,472 --> 00:17:33,226
We don't know
how many we have.
445
00:17:33,309 --> 00:17:36,190
Okay, so it's Last Starfighter
meets Quantum Leap now?
446
00:17:36,231 --> 00:17:37,359
Look, I'll give it
to you guys, all right?
447
00:17:37,484 --> 00:17:38,569
You're terrific actors,
448
00:17:38,612 --> 00:17:41,116
and your costumes
are impeccable,
449
00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:42,744
but I'm not buying it, okay?
450
00:17:42,828 --> 00:17:44,999
You just obviously researched
my love of video games
451
00:17:45,083 --> 00:17:47,002
and science fiction,
and are using it against me
452
00:17:47,086 --> 00:17:49,342
to trick me in a really,
really mean way.
453
00:17:49,384 --> 00:17:50,510
You're breaking and
entering right now.
454
00:17:50,635 --> 00:17:51,887
You can't even be‐‐
455
00:17:51,971 --> 00:17:54,143
(whirring)
456
00:17:54,268 --> 00:17:55,269
What's happening?
457
00:17:55,354 --> 00:17:57,775
I have risked way
too much to get here.
458
00:17:57,858 --> 00:17:59,528
We are not leaving without you.
459
00:17:59,653 --> 00:18:00,905
What's going on?
460
00:18:01,030 --> 00:18:03,703
(thunder and lightning)
461
00:18:03,744 --> 00:18:05,205
Oh, my God!
462
00:18:05,248 --> 00:18:07,251
Oh, oh shit.
463
00:18:07,377 --> 00:18:08,505
Oh, shit!
464
00:18:08,588 --> 00:18:16,228
♪
465
00:18:16,269 --> 00:18:17,772
Where's all my shit?
466
00:18:17,898 --> 00:18:18,901
Your shit's not here.
467
00:18:19,026 --> 00:18:20,528
We're not in
your room anymore.
468
00:18:20,613 --> 00:18:24,787
♪
469
00:18:24,913 --> 00:18:27,000
(muffled television noise)
470
00:18:27,041 --> 00:18:33,931
♪
471
00:18:34,056 --> 00:18:36,560
Altitude velocity lights.
472
00:18:36,644 --> 00:18:40,318
Three and a half down, 220 feet.
473
00:18:40,402 --> 00:18:43,866
Thirteen forward.
474
00:18:43,909 --> 00:18:47,039
What the heck?
475
00:18:47,164 --> 00:18:48,125
Daddy?
476
00:18:52,425 --> 00:18:53,929
Who are you?
477
00:18:54,054 --> 00:18:56,141
Five and a half down.
478
00:18:56,182 --> 00:18:57,936
Nine forward.
479
00:18:58,061 --> 00:19:00,317
I'm your‐‐
480
00:19:00,442 --> 00:19:02,445
Do your goddamn
drugs somewhere else,
481
00:19:02,571 --> 00:19:04,450
fucking hippie.
482
00:19:04,576 --> 00:19:06,538
♪ You know the day
destroys the night ♪
483
00:19:06,579 --> 00:19:07,789
‐Mom!
‐Calm down!
484
00:19:07,832 --> 00:19:09,084
Mom!
485
00:19:09,166 --> 00:19:11,338
Here we go, time
to see his moves.
486
00:19:11,423 --> 00:19:13,551
(lamp crashes)
487
00:19:13,594 --> 00:19:14,679
Help!
488
00:19:14,721 --> 00:19:15,722
♪
489
00:19:15,847 --> 00:19:16,807
Get him, Dad!
490
00:19:16,849 --> 00:19:18,979
‐Get out of my house!
‐It's my house too.
491
00:19:19,104 --> 00:19:20,356
(glass breaks)
492
00:19:20,441 --> 00:19:21,317
Future Man.
493
00:19:21,358 --> 00:19:24,490
Do a threat assessment
and fight back.
494
00:19:24,574 --> 00:19:25,659
No, no, no, no.
495
00:19:25,701 --> 00:19:28,457
Grandma, Grandma,
it's me, Joshy.
496
00:19:28,582 --> 00:19:29,791
Get him, Mom!
497
00:19:29,834 --> 00:19:33,717
♪
498
00:19:33,799 --> 00:19:34,926
Uncle Barry?
499
00:19:34,969 --> 00:19:36,847
(cocks gun)
500
00:19:36,972 --> 00:19:38,852
(grunting)
501
00:19:38,977 --> 00:19:40,855
The plates!
502
00:19:40,939 --> 00:19:42,484
All right, we tried
it your away,
503
00:19:42,609 --> 00:19:43,444
clearly it's not working.
504
00:19:43,487 --> 00:19:45,615
We don't know that yet.
505
00:19:45,740 --> 00:19:47,744
Ow, stop!
506
00:19:47,869 --> 00:19:49,205
You want me to jump in now?
507
00:19:49,247 --> 00:19:50,375
Or would you rather
watch your savior
508
00:19:50,500 --> 00:19:52,337
get beaten to death
by his own family?
509
00:19:52,380 --> 00:19:54,634
Ow, my ear!
510
00:19:54,759 --> 00:19:57,262
♪ She gets high ♪
511
00:19:57,390 --> 00:19:58,892
♪ She gets high ♪
512
00:19:58,974 --> 00:20:02,400
‐Man, no, no, no!
‐♪ She gets high ♪
513
00:20:02,525 --> 00:20:05,739
♪ She gets high ♪
514
00:20:05,780 --> 00:20:07,492
♪
515
00:20:07,617 --> 00:20:09,705
(dog barking)
516
00:20:09,747 --> 00:20:12,836
♪ I found an island
in your arms ♪
517
00:20:12,877 --> 00:20:15,384
♪ Country in your eyes ♪
518
00:20:15,509 --> 00:20:18,221
♪ Arms that chained us,
eyes that lied ♪
519
00:20:18,263 --> 00:20:20,894
♪ Break on through
to the other side ♪
520
00:20:20,978 --> 00:20:23,525
♪ Break on through
to the other side ♪
521
00:20:23,607 --> 00:20:25,027
♪ Oh, yeah ♪
522
00:20:25,111 --> 00:20:26,279
Whoa‐whoa‐whoa‐whoa!
523
00:20:26,364 --> 00:20:29,243
What the fuck
are you doing, moron?
524
00:20:29,286 --> 00:20:30,538
Move it!
525
00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:31,915
♪
526
00:20:32,000 --> 00:20:34,422
♪ Made the scene,
week to week ♪
527
00:20:34,547 --> 00:20:37,259
♪ Day to day,
hour to hour ♪
528
00:20:37,302 --> 00:20:38,763
♪ The gate is straight,
529
00:20:38,805 --> 00:20:40,141
deep and wide ♪
530
00:20:40,182 --> 00:20:42,896
♪ Break on through
to the other side ♪
531
00:20:42,938 --> 00:20:45,568
♪ Break on through
to the other side ♪
532
00:20:45,652 --> 00:20:48,281
♪ Break on through,
break on through ♪
533
00:20:48,325 --> 00:20:50,913
♪ Break on through,
break on through ♪
534
00:20:50,996 --> 00:20:55,506
‐♪ Break, break ♪♪
‐I traveled...in time.
535
00:20:55,547 --> 00:20:56,382
(laughing)
536
00:20:56,423 --> 00:20:58,511
(exclaiming)
537
00:20:58,552 --> 00:20:59,680
This is real.
538
00:20:59,763 --> 00:21:01,057
This is real‐‐
you're‐‐you're Tiger
539
00:21:01,182 --> 00:21:03,896
and you're Wolf,
and you're time travelers.
540
00:21:03,939 --> 00:21:06,151
Oh my God, oh my God,
tell me everything.
541
00:21:06,192 --> 00:21:07,570
Can I see a dinosaur?
542
00:21:07,695 --> 00:21:08,573
Can I please
see a dinosaur?
543
00:21:08,698 --> 00:21:09,826
What the fuck
happened in there?
544
00:21:09,951 --> 00:21:12,413
‐Why can't you fight?
‐Why can't I fight?
545
00:21:12,455 --> 00:21:13,916
I've never been
in one before.
546
00:21:13,959 --> 00:21:15,711
‐You're a warrior.
‐No, I'm not.
547
00:21:15,796 --> 00:21:17,715
‐But you're Future Man.
‐In the video game.
548
00:21:17,842 --> 00:21:18,969
Aren't people who play
video games supposed
549
00:21:19,051 --> 00:21:21,348
to embody the skills
of their online personas?
550
00:21:21,473 --> 00:21:22,977
No, no, it's the
complete opposite.
551
00:21:23,059 --> 00:21:24,438
Why would anybody
play video games
552
00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:25,857
if you could just do a
bunch of really cool shit
553
00:21:25,982 --> 00:21:27,736
in real life?
554
00:21:27,819 --> 00:21:29,490
I don't‐‐I don't understand.
555
00:21:29,615 --> 00:21:31,536
In our time, video games
are training simulators
556
00:21:31,577 --> 00:21:34,709
that hone the skills
of elite soldiers.
557
00:21:34,791 --> 00:21:36,712
Oh, no, yeah,
not in our time.
558
00:21:36,837 --> 00:21:39,594
No, it's like purely
escapism, recreation.
559
00:21:39,719 --> 00:21:43,727
Do you have any
useful skills?
560
00:21:43,852 --> 00:21:46,441
Uh, I'm good at word jumbles,
561
00:21:46,481 --> 00:21:48,612
um, Sudoku.
562
00:21:48,737 --> 00:21:49,864
Cumming on my leg.
563
00:21:49,989 --> 00:21:52,117
Okay, Wolf, I wasn't trying
to cum on your leg, okay?
564
00:21:52,242 --> 00:21:53,622
If this is gonna become
one of those things
565
00:21:53,747 --> 00:21:55,375
where like you can't
forgive me and move on
566
00:21:55,500 --> 00:21:57,880
until we're even,
then just go ahead,
567
00:21:58,005 --> 00:21:59,508
cum on my leg.
568
00:21:59,634 --> 00:22:02,137
Hey, guys,
check it out!
569
00:22:02,221 --> 00:22:04,769
Oh shit, we need to
change our clothes.
570
00:22:04,852 --> 00:22:05,770
Why?
571
00:22:05,854 --> 00:22:07,523
It's time travel 101,
you need to blend in.
572
00:22:07,650 --> 00:22:09,027
Don't look like
you're from the future.
573
00:22:09,109 --> 00:22:11,155
Look at this,
look at this shit‐‐
574
00:22:11,280 --> 00:22:12,742
Don't touch my gobulator.
575
00:22:12,826 --> 00:22:14,622
Hey, what the fuck
are you guys wearing?
576
00:22:14,747 --> 00:22:16,249
See, what did I tell you?
577
00:22:16,375 --> 00:22:18,380
You, give me your clothes.
578
00:22:18,505 --> 00:22:20,384
Oh...no, don't, don't, don't.
579
00:22:20,467 --> 00:22:22,010
Don't, they are bikers
580
00:22:22,135 --> 00:22:24,849
and bikers are assholes.
581
00:22:24,892 --> 00:22:28,147
Well, how about instead of
us taking off our clothes,
582
00:22:28,231 --> 00:22:29,734
you take off yours,
583
00:22:29,777 --> 00:22:33,032
and then maybe
give us a little dance.
584
00:22:33,157 --> 00:22:34,369
♪
585
00:22:34,412 --> 00:22:35,663
(screaming)
586
00:22:35,788 --> 00:22:37,542
Fuck this place up!
587
00:22:37,625 --> 00:22:39,296
Murder everyone!
588
00:22:39,380 --> 00:22:41,884
(exclaiming)
589
00:22:41,925 --> 00:22:43,304
♪ Stepped in my dreams
590
00:22:43,387 --> 00:22:45,433
and broke my own heart ♪♪
591
00:22:45,517 --> 00:22:46,810
Let's go.
592
00:22:46,894 --> 00:22:48,146
♪
593
00:22:48,188 --> 00:22:50,192
Yeah, crush his nuts.
594
00:22:50,276 --> 00:22:52,698
Break their skulls!
595
00:22:52,823 --> 00:22:54,034
Fuck.
596
00:22:54,075 --> 00:22:54,910
(grunting)
597
00:22:54,993 --> 00:22:55,787
Shit.
598
00:22:55,871 --> 00:22:58,667
♪
599
00:22:58,751 --> 00:23:00,253
(grunting)
600
00:23:00,297 --> 00:23:02,800
(screaming)
601
00:23:02,884 --> 00:23:07,143
♪
602
00:23:07,184 --> 00:23:08,186
Head shot.
603
00:23:08,269 --> 00:23:09,898
Oh, shit, is he okay?
604
00:23:09,940 --> 00:23:17,079
♪
605
00:23:17,204 --> 00:23:19,667
‐Head shot!
‐Head shot!
606
00:23:19,710 --> 00:23:20,921
Leg shot!
607
00:23:20,961 --> 00:23:23,550
♪
608
00:23:23,593 --> 00:23:25,846
And neutralized.
609
00:23:25,931 --> 00:23:28,353
Time to grab
a skull trophy.
610
00:23:28,478 --> 00:23:30,481
No‐no‐no, no‐no‐no, stop.
611
00:23:30,606 --> 00:23:31,733
What are you doing?
612
00:23:31,858 --> 00:23:33,613
Stopping you
from killing him.
613
00:23:33,695 --> 00:23:35,700
‐Why?
‐Do I really have to say this?
614
00:23:35,741 --> 00:23:36,827
Killing is wrong.
615
00:23:36,952 --> 00:23:38,914
Oh, I can't work
with this guy.
616
00:23:38,957 --> 00:23:40,084
Can we just
take their clothes
617
00:23:40,166 --> 00:23:41,586
and leave, please?
618
00:23:41,671 --> 00:23:44,593
You never had a problem with
killing in our simulator.
619
00:23:44,676 --> 00:23:46,972
Oh, my God, that guy's
bone is sticking out.
620
00:23:47,056 --> 00:23:50,229
♪
621
00:23:50,355 --> 00:23:52,817
(motorcycle growls)
622
00:23:52,859 --> 00:23:54,864
♪
623
00:23:54,989 --> 00:23:56,366
I mean, I think it
goes without saying,
624
00:23:56,491 --> 00:23:58,746
but I don't know how
to ride one of these.
625
00:23:58,829 --> 00:24:00,249
Just get on.
626
00:24:00,333 --> 00:24:02,127
‐On your‐‐
‐Mine.
627
00:24:02,211 --> 00:24:03,255
Yeah, okay.
628
00:24:03,381 --> 00:24:11,730
♪
629
00:24:14,903 --> 00:24:17,032
(chatter)
630
00:24:19,496 --> 00:24:21,959
Never seen so much
food in my life.
631
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:23,880
It's literally
hanging from the walls.
632
00:24:24,005 --> 00:24:26,384
I take it you don't
have delis in the future?
633
00:24:26,509 --> 00:24:28,262
No, we live in a sewer.
634
00:24:28,388 --> 00:24:30,142
We eat garbage and rats.
635
00:24:30,226 --> 00:24:32,772
‐Ew.
‐Yeah, no fucking shit.
636
00:24:32,897 --> 00:24:36,278
Eat a rat asshole,
then say fucking "ew."
637
00:24:36,404 --> 00:24:39,536
‐Here you go.
‐Thank you.
638
00:24:39,662 --> 00:24:42,165
Okay.
639
00:24:42,250 --> 00:24:43,795
(sniffs)
640
00:24:49,807 --> 00:24:51,309
Holy shit.
641
00:24:52,688 --> 00:24:53,815
Holy shit.
642
00:24:53,940 --> 00:24:55,317
Here's some water for you.
643
00:24:55,442 --> 00:24:57,823
Oh, these little green logs
are fucking amazing.
644
00:24:57,948 --> 00:24:58,950
They're called pickles.
645
00:24:59,032 --> 00:25:00,662
‐Calm down.
‐More logs!
646
00:25:00,744 --> 00:25:02,665
Okay, okay, look, I know
you're from the sewers
647
00:25:02,790 --> 00:25:03,875
and everything,
but you need to do
648
00:25:03,917 --> 00:25:05,422
a better job about
acting normal here, okay?
649
00:25:05,505 --> 00:25:07,048
What the fuck
does it matter?
650
00:25:07,133 --> 00:25:08,303
They're all fucking dead anyway.
651
00:25:08,428 --> 00:25:11,308
You're all fucking
dead, you're all dead!
652
00:25:11,392 --> 00:25:14,021
Just shoving food into
your dead fucking mouths!
653
00:25:14,063 --> 00:25:15,400
‐No, no, no.
‐So hope you have
654
00:25:15,442 --> 00:25:16,527
a great last meal.
655
00:25:16,568 --> 00:25:18,195
‐No, no, no, she's‐‐
‐Grandma, you're dead.
656
00:25:18,279 --> 00:25:20,535
‐You little girl, dead!
‐No, no, no, you're not dead.
657
00:25:20,576 --> 00:25:22,580
‐You're fucking dead.
‐You're okay, you're okay.
658
00:25:22,663 --> 00:25:23,583
Your kids are dead!
659
00:25:23,665 --> 00:25:24,835
Your kids are fine,
everybody's fine.
660
00:25:24,960 --> 00:25:26,588
‐Your babies are dead.
‐She's having a bad trip.
661
00:25:26,672 --> 00:25:28,925
It's the, you know,
'60s, it's...
662
00:25:28,968 --> 00:25:31,598
Okay, even if that is true,
you can't yell it at people
663
00:25:31,682 --> 00:25:32,851
when they're eating
their matzo ball soup.
664
00:25:32,976 --> 00:25:33,978
I know that you're upset.
665
00:25:34,103 --> 00:25:35,856
You don't know what I am
666
00:25:35,981 --> 00:25:37,108
or what I've been through
667
00:25:37,233 --> 00:25:38,613
or the people that
sacrificed their lives
668
00:25:38,695 --> 00:25:40,575
to get me here
because I thought you
669
00:25:40,616 --> 00:25:42,202
were the savior.
670
00:25:44,958 --> 00:25:46,836
I lost everyone to get here.
671
00:25:46,921 --> 00:25:47,963
And what?
672
00:25:48,048 --> 00:25:51,721
So you could fucking
enlighten me about pickles?
673
00:25:51,806 --> 00:25:53,351
Hey!
674
00:25:53,476 --> 00:25:56,230
Come on, now,
those are fucking good.
675
00:25:56,356 --> 00:25:57,817
You've nothing to offer.
676
00:25:57,858 --> 00:25:59,363
You are nothing like
the man I thought
677
00:25:59,445 --> 00:26:01,366
I was coming back for.
678
00:26:01,450 --> 00:26:02,993
Nothing.
679
00:26:03,119 --> 00:26:05,207
Wolf, fire up the TTD,
we're sending him back.
680
00:26:05,249 --> 00:26:07,878
No, no, no, no, please,
don't send me back!
681
00:26:08,003 --> 00:26:09,967
I just got here, I've
wanted this my entire life.
682
00:26:10,008 --> 00:26:12,888
Look, I can probably still
help out with the mission.
683
00:26:12,972 --> 00:26:14,224
No, you can't because
we don't even know
684
00:26:14,267 --> 00:26:15,394
where the fuck to start.
685
00:26:15,478 --> 00:26:17,147
But if you're
from the future,
686
00:26:17,230 --> 00:26:18,651
shouldn't you just
know everything?
687
00:26:18,776 --> 00:26:20,028
No.
688
00:26:20,112 --> 00:26:22,701
The Biotics control everything.
689
00:26:22,741 --> 00:26:27,209
All we know is that tonight,
on July 20th, 1969,
690
00:26:27,250 --> 00:26:29,338
something happens that
leads to the annihilation
691
00:26:29,381 --> 00:26:32,386
of the entire human race
and we were hoping
692
00:26:32,471 --> 00:26:34,516
that you'd be the key
to stopping Elias Kronish,
693
00:26:34,599 --> 00:26:35,852
but that is just...
694
00:26:35,894 --> 00:26:37,355
that's not gonna happen.
695
00:26:37,396 --> 00:26:39,484
Fuck, it's over.
696
00:26:39,526 --> 00:26:42,907
Do you mean Dr. Elias Kronish?
697
00:26:42,990 --> 00:26:44,912
How do you know that
motherfucker's name?
698
00:26:45,037 --> 00:26:46,624
I work with him.
699
00:26:46,664 --> 00:26:47,791
He's actually not
a motherfucker.
700
00:26:47,875 --> 00:26:49,045
He's like this
really sweet old man,
701
00:26:49,170 --> 00:26:50,923
and we're kind of,
like, becoming friends.
702
00:26:51,048 --> 00:26:52,927
That sweet old man's research
703
00:26:53,052 --> 00:26:55,682
leads to a super cure
for all diseases.
704
00:26:55,767 --> 00:26:57,938
The people injected
with the cure,
705
00:26:58,020 --> 00:26:59,441
those are the Biotics.
706
00:26:59,566 --> 00:27:02,153
No, he's working on
a cure for herpes.
707
00:27:02,195 --> 00:27:03,406
You're telling me
that a cure for herpes
708
00:27:03,449 --> 00:27:05,411
is what brings down
all of mankind?
709
00:27:05,537 --> 00:27:07,749
♪
710
00:27:07,790 --> 00:27:10,127
I am moving around,
getting familiar,
711
00:27:10,170 --> 00:27:12,299
getting familiar.
712
00:27:12,384 --> 00:27:15,431
Holy shit.
713
00:27:15,557 --> 00:27:17,685
The moon landing
party at Caltech.
714
00:27:17,769 --> 00:27:20,441
♪
715
00:27:20,525 --> 00:27:22,820
That's where Dr. Kronish
first gets herpes,
716
00:27:22,945 --> 00:27:24,281
that's the whole reason
he became a scientist,
717
00:27:24,324 --> 00:27:25,826
and that happens tonight.
718
00:27:25,910 --> 00:27:27,663
Go, go, go on.
719
00:27:27,705 --> 00:27:29,165
Okay.
720
00:27:29,208 --> 00:27:30,461
Okay, I got it, I got it.
721
00:27:30,545 --> 00:27:32,339
If we can get to Caltech
722
00:27:32,464 --> 00:27:34,302
and stop Dr. Kronish
from ever getting herpes,
723
00:27:34,344 --> 00:27:35,596
he'll never
become a scientist,
724
00:27:35,680 --> 00:27:39,354
and we can stop this whole
cycle before it even begins.
725
00:27:39,438 --> 00:27:43,068
Maybe you are the
savior after all.
726
00:27:43,111 --> 00:27:44,195
Oh, come on.
727
00:27:44,238 --> 00:27:45,700
I call fucking
bullshit on that.
728
00:27:45,741 --> 00:27:46,826
No, how can it be
a coincidence
729
00:27:46,910 --> 00:27:49,790
that the only person
who beats Biotic Wars
730
00:27:49,833 --> 00:27:51,711
just happens to be
friends with the man
731
00:27:51,795 --> 00:27:52,797
who destroys the human race?
732
00:27:52,838 --> 00:27:54,800
I don't think
that's a coincidence.
733
00:27:54,843 --> 00:27:55,845
You heard her, Wolf.
734
00:27:55,927 --> 00:27:56,971
Can't be a coincidence.
735
00:27:57,056 --> 00:27:57,932
It's destiny.
736
00:27:57,973 --> 00:27:59,226
Just like Super Mario Bros.
737
00:27:59,310 --> 00:28:00,730
All right, are you ready?
738
00:28:00,813 --> 00:28:01,856
Let's do this shit.
739
00:28:01,981 --> 00:28:02,983
'Cause this isn't
a game anymore.
740
00:28:03,108 --> 00:28:04,488
‐Nope.
‐Things are about to get real.
741
00:28:04,613 --> 00:28:06,240
‐Yep.
‐This is life or death.
742
00:28:06,366 --> 00:28:08,828
It's either kill
or be killed.
743
00:28:08,871 --> 00:28:10,207
I'm gonna have to kill?
744
00:28:10,248 --> 00:28:11,501
Or be killed.
745
00:28:11,585 --> 00:28:16,134
♪
746
00:28:16,259 --> 00:28:17,261
Oh, no.
747
00:28:17,346 --> 00:28:19,601
Is that an X28 Psychoblaster?
748
00:28:19,643 --> 00:28:21,269
Holy shit.
749
00:28:21,396 --> 00:28:23,483
(laser blast)
750
00:28:23,526 --> 00:28:25,363
‐Oh, fuck!
‐What the fuck are you doing?
751
00:28:25,404 --> 00:28:27,031
We gotta get out of here.
752
00:28:27,156 --> 00:28:28,493
♪
753
00:28:28,618 --> 00:28:29,496
Okay, okay, okay.
754
00:28:29,621 --> 00:28:30,498
(laser blast)
755
00:28:30,623 --> 00:28:31,500
Everybody get down!
756
00:28:31,625 --> 00:28:32,961
Heads on tables.
757
00:28:33,001 --> 00:28:34,839
We are from your time!
758
00:28:34,881 --> 00:28:36,092
♪
759
00:28:36,134 --> 00:28:38,137
Oh my God, shit
got real in there.
760
00:28:38,221 --> 00:28:39,516
♪
761
00:28:39,641 --> 00:28:40,727
Uh, guys, the cops.
762
00:28:40,768 --> 00:28:42,771
Cops, cops, cops.
763
00:28:42,855 --> 00:28:44,150
Our first call,
we've wanted this
764
00:28:44,275 --> 00:28:45,403
since we were kids.
765
00:28:45,486 --> 00:28:46,904
All right, Santiago,
you ready for this?
766
00:28:46,989 --> 00:28:48,366
Let's do this, Skaarsgard.
767
00:28:48,409 --> 00:28:49,661
They're gonna arrest us.
768
00:28:49,786 --> 00:28:51,999
(siren blares)
769
00:28:52,039 --> 00:28:53,294
Wh‐‐what are you doing?
770
00:28:53,376 --> 00:28:55,423
What are you doing?
771
00:28:55,506 --> 00:28:57,301
Is that a subatomic
sensor mine?
772
00:28:57,426 --> 00:29:00,307
♪
773
00:29:00,391 --> 00:29:01,809
(explosion)
774
00:29:01,894 --> 00:29:04,316
Oh, fuck!
775
00:29:04,441 --> 00:29:06,319
What the hell?
776
00:29:09,074 --> 00:29:10,536
(engine revs)
777
00:29:10,661 --> 00:29:12,288
Welcome to the Resistance.
778
00:29:12,373 --> 00:29:25,316
♪
779
00:29:25,441 --> 00:29:28,948
♪ While you keep
on dreaming, you kids,
780
00:29:29,030 --> 00:29:32,162
you must go on your way ♪
781
00:29:32,203 --> 00:29:35,670
♪ You get tired,
but you get started
782
00:29:35,711 --> 00:29:38,215
every day ♪
783
00:29:38,342 --> 00:29:40,846
♪ Pick up and go ♪
784
00:29:40,971 --> 00:29:43,309
♪ Or you can fall
on your face ♪
785
00:29:43,352 --> 00:29:45,815
♪
786
00:29:45,856 --> 00:29:48,362
♪ Go as long
787
00:29:48,444 --> 00:29:52,452
as to go you can ♪
788
00:29:52,537 --> 00:29:55,083
♪ Live as long
789
00:29:55,208 --> 00:29:58,213
as to live you can ♪
790
00:29:58,298 --> 00:29:59,215
♪
791
00:30:06,315 --> 00:30:11,115
♪
53128
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