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1
00:00:13,560 --> 00:00:17,326
You know,
I found my soul mate.
2
00:00:17,364 --> 00:00:19,229
Not only do I think
I'm in love with her,
3
00:00:19,266 --> 00:00:21,496
- but I think I've found the right one.
- Really?
4
00:00:21,535 --> 00:00:23,662
Yeah, Deborah.
It's only a couple of months,
5
00:00:23,704 --> 00:00:26,366
it could go south, but I don't think
it will, because she's...
6
00:00:26,406 --> 00:00:28,465
Why would it?
7
00:00:28,508 --> 00:00:31,102
Well, why has it for my whole life?
But she, I think...
8
00:00:31,144 --> 00:00:33,942
This is the one.
Is this the one?
9
00:00:33,980 --> 00:00:37,814
- No, no, that's not a good one.
- No, I meant Deborah.
10
00:00:37,851 --> 00:00:40,843
- Yeah, it's more like I love her soul.
- Mm-mmm.
11
00:00:40,887 --> 00:00:44,118
- Do you know what l...?
- Her soul.
12
00:00:44,157 --> 00:00:47,183
It's not just like it used to be for me,
you know, like a "trophy."
13
00:00:47,227 --> 00:00:49,752
- It's not all about looks anymore?
- She's attractive.
14
00:00:49,796 --> 00:00:52,287
- No, she is attractive.
- But you don't care about that.
15
00:00:52,332 --> 00:00:54,630
I think one of the things is,
the only downside...
16
00:00:54,668 --> 00:00:56,659
What do you think
of this color?
17
00:00:56,703 --> 00:00:59,035
I don't like...
it's too flashy.
18
00:00:59,072 --> 00:01:01,370
She's a Christian
Scientist and...
19
00:01:01,408 --> 00:01:05,845
She's a what?
She's a Christian Scientist?
20
00:01:05,879 --> 00:01:08,074
She's a Christian Scientist,
and I, it's...
21
00:01:08,115 --> 00:01:10,015
Oh, dear.
22
00:01:10,050 --> 00:01:11,642
- Did you just say, "Oh, dear"?
- Yeah.
23
00:01:11,685 --> 00:01:15,348
I don't think you've ever said that
in your entire life.
24
00:01:15,389 --> 00:01:17,857
No one's ever told me they were
dating a Christian Scientist.
25
00:01:17,891 --> 00:01:21,349
- I've been saving it.
- If anything called for an "Oh, dear"...
26
00:01:21,395 --> 00:01:24,023
Holy cow,
a Christian Scientist.
27
00:01:24,064 --> 00:01:26,191
It's a nightmare
for me, because,
28
00:01:26,233 --> 00:01:29,464
I'm under the weather about 99%
of my life, and she doesn't...
29
00:01:29,503 --> 00:01:31,664
She won't bring you
the medicine?
30
00:01:31,705 --> 00:01:34,503
- This is out of their...
- I know they can't take it,
31
00:01:34,541 --> 00:01:36,805
but can they touch it
and give it to somebody else?
32
00:01:36,843 --> 00:01:39,676
She doesn't have
a medicine chest in her place.
33
00:01:39,713 --> 00:01:41,647
Wait, one second.
34
00:01:41,681 --> 00:01:43,546
- Do you want more time?
- No, no, it's fine.
35
00:01:43,583 --> 00:01:46,450
What... you know,
I want to get one of these,
36
00:01:46,486 --> 00:01:48,477
I don't have
good luck with them.
37
00:01:48,522 --> 00:01:50,387
- That's the one I have.
- You like this one?
38
00:01:50,424 --> 00:01:52,324
- I bought that... not here.
- You've got the same one?
39
00:01:52,359 --> 00:01:54,259
- Yeah, I love it.
- It's a good phone,
40
00:01:54,294 --> 00:01:56,091
- it's an XR-71.
- It's a great one.
41
00:01:56,129 --> 00:01:58,563
But it does go out on occasion,
like in a tunnel or something.
42
00:01:58,598 --> 00:02:00,862
You can't hear a radio
when you go in a tunnel.
43
00:02:00,901 --> 00:02:04,359
- Yes, you can, FM. You're an idiot.
- I never listen to FM.
44
00:02:04,404 --> 00:02:08,306
- What do you listen to?
- I listen to talk.
45
00:02:08,341 --> 00:02:10,741
You have a lot of program,
a lot of rings in that.
46
00:02:10,777 --> 00:02:12,472
Okay, I'm gonna
take this.
47
00:02:12,512 --> 00:02:13,945
Listen, I meant to ask you this,
48
00:02:13,980 --> 00:02:15,709
I have to hand in
this special,
49
00:02:15,749 --> 00:02:19,651
and you know how I like you
to watch it. It's not locked in yet.
50
00:02:19,686 --> 00:02:23,247
Now is the time to tell me if you think
something's... can you watch it?
51
00:02:23,290 --> 00:02:26,225
I'd love to, sure. Why don't you come
over with Deborah on Friday?
52
00:02:26,259 --> 00:02:28,090
We can have dinner
and watch the special.
53
00:02:28,128 --> 00:02:30,790
That would be fantastic.
That would be phenomenal.
54
00:02:30,831 --> 00:02:32,856
- Is that good?
- I'd be in heaven.
55
00:02:32,899 --> 00:02:34,924
I mean, you know,
she'd be thrilled.
56
00:02:34,968 --> 00:02:36,731
Bravo.
57
00:02:36,770 --> 00:02:38,738
- First call.
- I know.
58
00:02:38,772 --> 00:02:41,400
- First call.
- Very impressive.
59
00:02:44,177 --> 00:02:46,270
Hey, it's working!
60
00:02:46,313 --> 00:02:48,781
Yeah, I'm right outside
Cellular Depot.
61
00:02:48,815 --> 00:02:52,774
I just got it.
You're my first call.
62
00:02:52,819 --> 00:02:55,151
What are we doing
on Friday night?
63
00:02:55,188 --> 00:02:57,952
Okay, good, because
Richard's gonna come over
64
00:02:57,991 --> 00:02:59,618
with his new
girlfriend Deborah
65
00:02:59,659 --> 00:03:01,957
and we'll
watch his special.
66
00:03:01,995 --> 00:03:04,395
Wait, how about this?
67
00:03:04,431 --> 00:03:07,366
Why don't you call Ted Danson
and get the number
68
00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:09,391
of Randy, the chef
from our restaurant?
69
00:03:09,436 --> 00:03:12,769
He could cater
the whole thing. Great idea.
70
00:03:12,806 --> 00:03:15,741
And you work out
whatever the money is.
71
00:03:15,775 --> 00:03:17,640
She's allergic to peanuts,
no peanuts.
72
00:03:17,677 --> 00:03:19,907
She's allergic
to peanuts, so no peanuts.
73
00:03:19,946 --> 00:03:22,540
Okay.
74
00:03:22,582 --> 00:03:25,073
Ask her if Jeff could come,
he hasn't seen the thing.
75
00:03:25,118 --> 00:03:27,882
Oh, and can Jeff come,
because he hasn't seen it.
76
00:03:29,155 --> 00:03:31,453
Yeah.
77
00:03:31,491 --> 00:03:33,482
That's right,
my friends for a change.
78
00:03:49,543 --> 00:03:52,512
Well, Deborah, I heard that you guys
are going to the Emmys.
79
00:03:52,546 --> 00:03:54,411
- Yes.
- Is that right?
80
00:03:54,447 --> 00:03:57,007
- So excited.
- Are you excited? Have you ever been?
81
00:03:57,050 --> 00:04:00,247
- Oh, yeah. It's really exciting.
- It is exciting.
82
00:04:00,287 --> 00:04:02,949
- I got a dress made.
- You had it made?
83
00:04:02,989 --> 00:04:05,981
Gorgeous. Armando on Beverly,
fits like a glove.
84
00:04:06,026 --> 00:04:08,494
Wow. We're gonna be watching it...
the East Coast feed.
85
00:04:08,528 --> 00:04:10,519
I'm having
some friends over,
86
00:04:10,564 --> 00:04:12,555
Maybe we'll see you guys
walk down the red carpet.
87
00:04:12,599 --> 00:04:14,692
She's got a whole party
planned to watch it.
88
00:04:14,734 --> 00:04:17,828
- Do you have ketchup?
- Huh? What? Ketchup?
89
00:04:17,871 --> 00:04:19,395
- Yeah.
- Why?
90
00:04:19,439 --> 00:04:21,930
I can't eat this steak
without some ketchup.
91
00:04:21,975 --> 00:04:24,535
You can't ask...
92
00:04:24,578 --> 00:04:27,103
Randy! Can I have some
ketchup please?
93
00:04:27,147 --> 00:04:29,547
You don't ask
a chef for ketchup.
94
00:04:29,583 --> 00:04:33,019
- He's right, Larry's right.
- Why is it insulting? It's ketchup.
95
00:04:33,053 --> 00:04:35,715
This is good food.
It's like a truck-stop thing.
96
00:04:35,755 --> 00:04:38,246
- Ketchup?
- Thank you very much.
97
00:04:38,291 --> 00:04:40,919
- The food is great.
- Is it? Is it good?
98
00:04:40,961 --> 00:04:42,952
- Really wonderful, thank you.
- Delicious.
99
00:04:42,996 --> 00:04:45,931
- Really good stuff.
- It's good.
100
00:04:45,966 --> 00:04:47,831
Thank you.
101
00:04:47,867 --> 00:04:50,802
What did you ask for ketchup for?
What are you crazy?
102
00:04:50,837 --> 00:04:52,964
What?!
103
00:04:53,006 --> 00:04:55,839
You know what? I am never having
you guys over for dinner again.
104
00:04:55,875 --> 00:04:58,173
Why? What
did I do wrong?
105
00:04:58,211 --> 00:04:59,872
It's exhausting,
it's just exhausting.
106
00:04:59,913 --> 00:05:01,813
So, where's
this HBO special?
107
00:05:01,848 --> 00:05:05,841
LD, here it is. Listen,
how long was the tour before...
108
00:05:05,885 --> 00:05:08,820
like four months?
This is only just one show.
109
00:05:08,855 --> 00:05:10,618
- Oh, come on.
- It's great, don't even...
110
00:05:10,657 --> 00:05:12,750
I just...
111
00:05:12,792 --> 00:05:15,226
I can't wait
to see it, Richard.
112
00:05:15,261 --> 00:05:17,229
I love you
for having me.
113
00:05:17,263 --> 00:05:18,924
To have you guys
here like this is great.
114
00:05:18,965 --> 00:05:22,401
These are the best brownies
I have ever had.
115
00:05:22,435 --> 00:05:24,630
Susie made them,
my wife.
116
00:05:24,671 --> 00:05:27,435
I dropped my daughter off
this afternoon,
117
00:05:27,474 --> 00:05:28,668
brought us
some brownies.
118
00:05:28,708 --> 00:05:31,040
That's a good
sound system you have.
119
00:05:34,514 --> 00:05:36,812
What's happening,
Larry?
120
00:05:36,850 --> 00:05:38,249
Shit.
121
00:05:38,284 --> 00:05:41,310
Why do you have
so many remotes?
122
00:05:41,354 --> 00:05:43,788
Yeah, I wish I had
the answer to that.
123
00:05:43,823 --> 00:05:46,815
We have this guy,
Mike, that comes in
124
00:05:46,860 --> 00:05:50,352
and I don't even know how
to work the TV anymore, honestly.
125
00:05:50,397 --> 00:05:53,264
- It has to be on channel 3.
- It's on channel 3.
126
00:05:53,299 --> 00:05:57,258
Every week we have this guy
come over and try to fix it.
127
00:05:57,303 --> 00:05:58,895
You know what, Larry?
128
00:05:58,938 --> 00:06:01,736
The Emmys are this Sunday
and I am not gonna miss them.
129
00:06:01,775 --> 00:06:04,573
We missed half the Knick game
last year because of this shit.
130
00:06:04,611 --> 00:06:08,240
This is ridiculous.
You're gonna have to fire Mike.
131
00:06:08,281 --> 00:06:10,476
- I'm not gonna fire him.
- Why not?
132
00:06:10,517 --> 00:06:12,712
I don't know, he's black,
I don't want to fire him.
133
00:06:12,752 --> 00:06:15,152
You don't want
to fire a black guy?
134
00:06:15,188 --> 00:06:17,088
- No, I don't want to fire him.
- That's crazy!
135
00:06:17,123 --> 00:06:18,920
- It's ridiculous!
- Who cares what he is?
136
00:06:18,958 --> 00:06:21,324
- If he sucks, he sucks.
- Well, he could come in and fix it...
137
00:06:21,361 --> 00:06:23,522
Every week he comes in,
he never fixes it.
138
00:06:23,563 --> 00:06:27,260
We can't even watch his special.
That's ridiculous!
139
00:06:27,300 --> 00:06:29,268
Fire your guy.
I got a good guy.
140
00:06:29,302 --> 00:06:31,167
- Will you fix this?
- I don't know how to.
141
00:06:31,204 --> 00:06:35,106
I tried every remote,
and none of them work. Look!
142
00:06:35,141 --> 00:06:39,601
So fucking idiotic... you should
have one goddamn remote and...
143
00:06:39,646 --> 00:06:42,410
We should have one remote!
You need to call him, Larry.
144
00:06:42,449 --> 00:06:44,781
Are you gonna call him?
145
00:06:44,818 --> 00:06:46,979
Well, maybe
we should play Scrabble.
146
00:06:47,020 --> 00:06:49,750
- Nothing we can do.
- That's a bad joke, right?
147
00:06:49,789 --> 00:06:51,780
Yeah, it is a joke,
I mean, I don't...
148
00:06:51,825 --> 00:06:53,793
Scrabble?
149
00:06:53,827 --> 00:06:55,795
It's a joke, but what
are we supposed to do?
150
00:06:55,829 --> 00:06:57,160
You want to sit Shiva?
151
00:06:57,197 --> 00:06:59,165
Why don't we play Twister,
would you be happy?
152
00:06:59,199 --> 00:07:01,861
If this was your show, then you
would make every fucking plan...
153
00:07:01,901 --> 00:07:06,338
Let's go upstairs and all get under
the covers and sob.
154
00:07:06,372 --> 00:07:09,034
Why don't we go to my house
and watch it? What's wrong with that?
155
00:07:09,075 --> 00:07:10,804
- I'll go to your house.
- Thank you.
156
00:07:10,844 --> 00:07:13,711
The whole reason for the night
was to watch your thing.
157
00:07:13,747 --> 00:07:16,545
All right, fine,
we'll go to your house.
158
00:07:16,583 --> 00:07:19,177
I'll pack these brownies up.
We'll take it...
159
00:07:19,219 --> 00:07:20,709
I don't feel well.
160
00:07:20,754 --> 00:07:22,949
I really don't feel well,
I don't think I can go.
161
00:07:22,989 --> 00:07:24,786
What do you mean?
You don't feel well?
162
00:07:24,824 --> 00:07:26,416
I'd like to go home,
I think.
163
00:07:26,459 --> 00:07:29,121
You feel perfectly...
you're almost cold like a corpse.
164
00:07:29,162 --> 00:07:30,595
Do you want
an aspirin?
165
00:07:30,630 --> 00:07:33,098
No, I can't take an aspirin,
but, thank you.
166
00:07:33,133 --> 00:07:35,158
What's the matter?
167
00:07:35,201 --> 00:07:39,103
Um, I don't... any peanuts
in the brownies?
168
00:07:39,139 --> 00:07:41,664
No, no way. I don't like peanuts.
My wife never uses them.
169
00:07:41,708 --> 00:07:43,232
I wouldn't allow
that to happen.
170
00:07:43,276 --> 00:07:45,141
I ate so many of those.
171
00:07:45,178 --> 00:07:48,045
There was no peanuts
or peanut oil or anything in the dinner.
172
00:07:48,081 --> 00:07:50,276
You told Randy not...
That she's allergic, right?
173
00:07:50,316 --> 00:07:53,308
What?
174
00:07:53,353 --> 00:07:57,119
- I told you on the phone.
- You didn't tell me on the phone.
175
00:07:57,157 --> 00:07:59,717
I told you when I spoke to you
on the phone that...
176
00:07:59,759 --> 00:08:01,750
No, you didn't.
177
00:08:01,795 --> 00:08:04,127
- What, are you kidding?
- What are you talking about?
178
00:08:04,164 --> 00:08:06,530
He did, I was standing right next
to him when he called you.
179
00:08:06,566 --> 00:08:11,060
I didn't hear it, you never said it
or I didn't hear it.
180
00:08:11,104 --> 00:08:14,130
I'll bet the cell phone. I bet
there was interference on the cell.
181
00:08:14,174 --> 00:08:16,142
They have drop-outs
all the time.
182
00:08:16,176 --> 00:08:18,303
Jesus Christ,
I knew you fucked it up.
183
00:08:18,344 --> 00:08:21,802
I fucked it up?! What kind
of stupid thing is that to say?
184
00:08:21,848 --> 00:08:23,475
- I "fucked it up."
- You fucked it up!
185
00:08:23,516 --> 00:08:25,279
You don't know
how to use a goddamn cell phone!
186
00:08:25,318 --> 00:08:27,149
- It was a shit cell phone!
- Okay, Deborah is sick!
187
00:08:27,187 --> 00:08:29,121
A praying mantis
can use that goddamn phone!
188
00:08:29,155 --> 00:08:30,918
I'd really like
to go home.
189
00:08:30,957 --> 00:08:34,358
All I can do really
is wait it out.
190
00:08:34,394 --> 00:08:36,862
I am so sorry.
You should...
191
00:08:36,896 --> 00:08:39,387
Why don't
we just go home
192
00:08:39,432 --> 00:08:42,731
and, can't you just, take a nap,
and we can all watch it at my house?
193
00:08:42,769 --> 00:08:44,930
You could take a nap.
Or why don't...
194
00:08:44,971 --> 00:08:47,405
I'd like you to take me home.
195
00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:49,374
She needs
to go home, Richard.
196
00:08:49,409 --> 00:08:51,138
- You know, this is really...
- Thank you.
197
00:08:51,177 --> 00:08:54,374
I am so sorry, Deborah.
I never got that...
198
00:08:54,414 --> 00:08:56,211
I feel very awkward
about it.
199
00:08:56,249 --> 00:08:58,979
What a shame.
We can't even get to watch the special.
200
00:08:59,018 --> 00:09:00,747
I get home
and I'll be fine.
201
00:09:00,787 --> 00:09:02,118
You want to just
drive home?
202
00:09:02,155 --> 00:09:03,850
I don't feel comfortable
driving myself.
203
00:09:03,890 --> 00:09:06,950
She needs you to take her home.
You know? I mean...
204
00:09:06,993 --> 00:09:08,722
- Now.
- All right, we're going.
205
00:09:08,761 --> 00:09:10,991
You're such a fucking idiot,
how can you do this?
206
00:09:11,030 --> 00:09:14,830
- She's not looking well...
- Cell phone, you fucked up.
207
00:09:14,868 --> 00:09:16,733
Well, we'll watch it,
don't worry.
208
00:09:16,769 --> 00:09:19,602
- That's horrible.
- Scrabble?
209
00:09:19,639 --> 00:09:22,733
- I'd love to play Scrabble.
- I said it and kind of got in the mood.
210
00:09:22,775 --> 00:09:24,470
- Let's get it.
- Really? You want to play?
211
00:09:24,510 --> 00:09:27,445
- I'm all over it. Let's go.
- Absolutely. Okay.
212
00:09:27,480 --> 00:09:29,948
You don't need to play,
it's better with two.
213
00:09:29,983 --> 00:09:31,974
Do you have any milk?
214
00:09:34,387 --> 00:09:36,355
I'm sorry,
but I got five remotes,
215
00:09:36,389 --> 00:09:37,913
nothing's working.
216
00:09:37,957 --> 00:09:41,290
Just be honest, man.
'Cause I'm black, right? Right?
217
00:09:41,327 --> 00:09:44,262
Why? That couldn't be crazier.
218
00:09:44,297 --> 00:09:46,026
Crazy. Why did I hire you?
219
00:09:46,065 --> 00:09:49,125
That was over the phone, You didn't
know I was black at the time.
220
00:09:50,637 --> 00:09:53,936
All right, that's true,
but I kept you around.
221
00:09:53,973 --> 00:09:55,964
But you're getting
rid of me, right?
222
00:09:56,009 --> 00:09:57,977
I fire white people,
I've fired white people.
223
00:09:58,011 --> 00:09:59,410
I have fired
plenty of white people.
224
00:09:59,445 --> 00:10:01,606
I've been doing this
15 years, all right?
225
00:10:01,648 --> 00:10:04,515
Okay, okay. You know what?
It's not even me.
226
00:10:04,550 --> 00:10:07,110
Can I be...?
Okay.
227
00:10:07,153 --> 00:10:09,121
You want... can we
be honest here?
228
00:10:09,155 --> 00:10:11,715
Okay, let's be honest,
okay?
229
00:10:12,825 --> 00:10:16,317
It's my wife.
She wants...
230
00:10:16,362 --> 00:10:18,660
- Oh, dude.
- No, seriously.
231
00:10:18,698 --> 00:10:22,190
Please don't go there, man.
No, be man enough.
232
00:10:22,235 --> 00:10:25,898
Look, be man enough. If you gonna
be a racist, be a man, man.
233
00:10:25,939 --> 00:10:28,134
I was a man.
What good did it do me?
234
00:10:28,174 --> 00:10:29,937
Don't blame it
on your wife. Thank you.
235
00:10:29,976 --> 00:10:32,137
You're blaming it on your race.
What's worse?
236
00:10:32,178 --> 00:10:34,669
I'd rather blame it on my wife
than blame it on my race.
237
00:10:34,714 --> 00:10:36,147
Right, whatever.
238
00:10:36,182 --> 00:10:38,150
Come on, don't take it...
don't be like that.
239
00:10:38,184 --> 00:10:40,618
- I got this.
- I got the tip.
240
00:10:40,653 --> 00:10:43,281
- That's okay, I got the tip.
- I got the tip, man.
241
00:10:43,323 --> 00:10:45,450
Okay, don't be mad.
242
00:10:45,491 --> 00:10:46,890
Come on, don't...
come on, Mike.
243
00:10:46,926 --> 00:10:49,895
I wish you wouldn't be
mad about it.
244
00:10:49,929 --> 00:10:52,591
I'm gonna recommend you
to a lot of people.
245
00:10:52,632 --> 00:10:55,226
- Whatever.
- I will, I'll recommend you.
246
00:11:16,589 --> 00:11:18,819
Hey, Wanda.
247
00:11:33,606 --> 00:11:36,234
- Oh, hello.
- Hello.
248
00:11:36,275 --> 00:11:37,970
Are you here
for the prayer group?
249
00:11:38,011 --> 00:11:40,502
- No, I'm not.
- Oh.
250
00:11:40,546 --> 00:11:42,309
I'm actually here
to see Deborah.
251
00:11:42,348 --> 00:11:45,215
Oh, unfortunately
she's a little under the weather.
252
00:11:45,251 --> 00:11:47,219
I know.
253
00:11:47,253 --> 00:11:50,222
She actually
ate the peanuts in my house.
254
00:11:50,256 --> 00:11:52,690
Oh, I know about you.
Hello, I'm Deborah's mother.
255
00:11:52,725 --> 00:11:55,387
- Oh, hi, I'm Larry.
- I know.
256
00:11:55,428 --> 00:11:57,555
I feel terrible about this.
257
00:11:57,597 --> 00:12:00,691
Oh, no, no, don't. We're all
responsible for our own lives.
258
00:12:01,934 --> 00:12:04,027
I think there's
some truth to that, isn't there?
259
00:12:04,070 --> 00:12:06,061
Come.
260
00:12:07,106 --> 00:12:09,097
Right this way.
261
00:12:09,142 --> 00:12:11,372
This is our
prayer group.
262
00:12:11,411 --> 00:12:14,209
You're welcome
to join us afterwards.
263
00:12:14,247 --> 00:12:16,909
Oh, okay. Let's see how
I'm doing on time.
264
00:12:16,949 --> 00:12:20,282
Okay.
And Deborah's right in there.
265
00:12:30,296 --> 00:12:33,732
I'll be fine
to go to the Emmys.
266
00:12:33,766 --> 00:12:36,735
Come on, look at you.
How can we have a ball?
267
00:12:36,769 --> 00:12:39,602
- Your lips are like balloons.
- Hi, Larry.
268
00:12:39,639 --> 00:12:42,301
She thinks she can go tomorrow night.
You believe this shit?
269
00:12:42,341 --> 00:12:44,275
Oh, my gosh.
270
00:12:44,310 --> 00:12:46,938
Will you tell him
it's not that bad, is it?
271
00:12:46,979 --> 00:12:48,844
Can you see
out of that eye?
272
00:12:48,881 --> 00:12:51,076
I can see,
of course I can see.
273
00:12:51,117 --> 00:12:54,416
Honey, they're bulging almost.
For crying out loud, hon'.
274
00:12:54,454 --> 00:12:58,322
I'm so sorry about the peanuts
and the whole thing there.
275
00:12:58,357 --> 00:13:02,054
You know, I had this new
cell phone, and it just... it didn't.
276
00:13:02,095 --> 00:13:03,790
Yeah, no, really.
277
00:13:03,830 --> 00:13:06,025
I think it was more peanuts
than the cell.
278
00:13:06,065 --> 00:13:08,158
He recommended
this phone to me.
279
00:13:08,201 --> 00:13:11,898
That's beside the point. Look at her...
she thinks she can go to the awards.
280
00:13:11,938 --> 00:13:13,428
Tell him I'll be fine
by tomorrow night.
281
00:13:13,473 --> 00:13:15,532
He's a sensible man,
on occasion.
282
00:13:15,575 --> 00:13:17,566
I'll be fine.
Sweetie, I'll be fine.
283
00:13:17,610 --> 00:13:20,443
Honey, you don't...
you don't have to go.
284
00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:22,004
- He's right.
- I have to go.
285
00:13:22,048 --> 00:13:24,642
You know what you
should think about?
286
00:13:24,684 --> 00:13:28,211
You should take Benadryl.
You'd knock that out in five minutes.
287
00:13:28,254 --> 00:13:30,745
The thing would be gone.
You wouldn't even think about it.
288
00:13:30,790 --> 00:13:33,054
I can't believe
I didn't think of that. That was one...
289
00:13:33,092 --> 00:13:35,253
- I don't take medication.
- Pop it in.
290
00:13:35,294 --> 00:13:37,091
- "Pop it in"?
- Who's gonna know?
291
00:13:37,130 --> 00:13:40,327
Pop it in?
That's a betrayal of my faith.
292
00:13:40,366 --> 00:13:43,028
Jesus would be very happy
for you to look better than you do now.
293
00:13:43,069 --> 00:13:45,037
No one's watching.
Pop, take a pop.
294
00:13:45,071 --> 00:13:47,039
Listen, I have spent
my entire life
295
00:13:47,073 --> 00:13:49,098
in belief and faith.
296
00:13:49,142 --> 00:13:51,542
Well, why not
just pray for the TV?
297
00:13:51,577 --> 00:13:54,068
Why even have somebody
come in and fix the television?
298
00:13:54,113 --> 00:13:56,240
Why not just pray?
299
00:13:56,282 --> 00:13:59,877
Pray for the TV?
What is that? What?
300
00:14:01,053 --> 00:14:02,816
Hey, by the way,
is that guy any good?
301
00:14:02,855 --> 00:14:06,120
I don't know.
It's my parents' house.
302
00:14:06,159 --> 00:14:07,751
We got all sorts of problems,
303
00:14:07,793 --> 00:14:09,954
you were there...
with all those remotes,
304
00:14:09,996 --> 00:14:11,588
and Cheryl,
it's a pain in the neck.
305
00:14:11,631 --> 00:14:13,929
I just had to fire our guy.
I'm looking for somebody.
306
00:14:13,966 --> 00:14:16,560
I'd like one remote that could
take care of the whole thing.
307
00:14:16,602 --> 00:14:18,263
I don't know
if he's good, Lar.
308
00:14:18,304 --> 00:14:20,272
Maybe you should ask him...
on your way out.
309
00:14:20,306 --> 00:14:22,934
Do you have one remote, or two?
How many do you have?
310
00:14:22,975 --> 00:14:24,966
Oh, Richard...?
311
00:14:28,781 --> 00:14:31,443
Oh, Larry.
Come.
312
00:14:31,484 --> 00:14:34,248
Just in time.
We're about to begin the prayer circle.
313
00:14:34,287 --> 00:14:36,118
You've gotta be kidding.
Believe me,
314
00:14:36,155 --> 00:14:38,817
you don't want me in this.
She'll wind up with tuberculosis.
315
00:14:38,858 --> 00:14:40,621
I really got bad karma,
I'm not kidding.
316
00:14:40,660 --> 00:14:43,220
- Oh, yes, we do.
- I beg to differ.
317
00:14:43,262 --> 00:14:46,060
Grab hands.
Let us join hands.
318
00:14:46,098 --> 00:14:48,259
Oh, no, no. Not this arrangement.
Let's do boy/girl here.
319
00:14:48,301 --> 00:14:51,031
Join hands.
Join hands.
320
00:14:51,070 --> 00:14:53,561
Put her over here.
321
00:14:53,606 --> 00:14:56,234
No, she needs to be over there
with her husband.
322
00:14:58,744 --> 00:15:02,874
And as we continue
this healing light,
323
00:15:02,915 --> 00:15:06,373
we know, Jesus,
that You are with us,
324
00:15:06,419 --> 00:15:08,649
and You are
always with us,
325
00:15:08,688 --> 00:15:12,124
for Thine is the power,
and the glory,
326
00:15:12,158 --> 00:15:17,095
forever and ever.
No one can touch us,
327
00:15:17,129 --> 00:15:18,824
for God is always
with us.
328
00:15:18,864 --> 00:15:20,957
- Oh, cell phone.
329
00:15:22,068 --> 00:15:25,731
I'm sorry.
I just got this cell phone.
330
00:15:26,739 --> 00:15:30,072
Hello? Oh, hey.
331
00:15:30,109 --> 00:15:33,840
Maybe.
Who are they playing?
332
00:15:33,879 --> 00:15:36,814
I'm gonna be humiliated.
This is a fucking nightmare.
333
00:15:36,849 --> 00:15:39,818
You know why
this is a nightmare?
334
00:15:39,852 --> 00:15:42,320
You, my friend.
Yes, yes, you.
335
00:15:42,355 --> 00:15:43,913
Because of this
fucking highfalutin...
336
00:15:43,956 --> 00:15:46,789
you gotta go, join a restaurant,
have an interest,
337
00:15:46,826 --> 00:15:48,817
have them come over
and cook peanut sauce...
338
00:15:48,861 --> 00:15:51,386
Hey. It had nothing
to do with that.
339
00:15:51,430 --> 00:15:53,295
If it wasn't
for the peanuts,
340
00:15:53,332 --> 00:15:55,357
she wouldn't look like a goddamn
fucking Venetian!
341
00:15:55,401 --> 00:15:57,335
The cell phone
that you recommended didn't work!
342
00:15:57,370 --> 00:15:59,099
That cell is used by every
fucking person.
343
00:15:59,138 --> 00:16:01,902
- You don't know...
- Did you see my girlfriend?
344
00:16:01,941 --> 00:16:04,739
You said you didn't give a shit
about the way she looks.
345
00:16:05,878 --> 00:16:09,439
Would you show up at an event...
346
00:16:09,482 --> 00:16:10,949
Would /?
347
00:16:10,983 --> 00:16:13,383
with a person that looks like
she has a macaroni salad...
348
00:16:13,419 --> 00:16:16,354
...about the soul,
you love her soul and all that.
349
00:16:16,389 --> 00:16:18,619
Part of that is true,
but this is unbelievable.
350
00:16:18,658 --> 00:16:21,650
I have to... what kind of fucking...
why can't she take a Benadryl?
351
00:16:21,694 --> 00:16:24,663
These people, what are they doing?
I don't understand this attitude.
352
00:16:24,697 --> 00:16:26,324
I don't understand
it either.
353
00:16:26,365 --> 00:16:29,095
Take a Benadryl.
She'll be better in five minutes.
354
00:16:29,135 --> 00:16:31,535
Can you imagine me
getting out of the limo with my date?
355
00:16:31,570 --> 00:16:33,265
She's pretty
hell bent on going too.
356
00:16:33,306 --> 00:16:35,604
She's got the dress,
"I got the dress."
357
00:16:35,641 --> 00:16:38,041
- You know, I know, I know.
- She's ready.
358
00:16:38,077 --> 00:16:40,045
Yeah, know what would
match her head?
359
00:16:40,079 --> 00:16:44,379
A dress made of turnips
and blood, you know?
360
00:16:44,417 --> 00:16:47,284
Oh, God, she's so hideous.
She should look in the mirror.
361
00:16:47,320 --> 00:16:49,220
Does she even know
what she looks like?
362
00:16:49,255 --> 00:16:52,918
- She denies it. It's a denial thing.
- Why don't you take her? lt'll be fun.
363
00:16:52,958 --> 00:16:55,188
Oh, that's very...
oh, yeah, Mr. Big Shot.
364
00:16:55,227 --> 00:16:58,390
- Why don't you take her?
- What do we do? You gotta help me out.
365
00:16:58,431 --> 00:17:00,661
You gotta get a shot
and stick it in her ass...
366
00:17:00,700 --> 00:17:03,635
- She's not a racehorse.
- You gotta get a shot of Benadryl
367
00:17:03,669 --> 00:17:05,796
while she's sleeping,
or shove it down her throat.
368
00:17:05,838 --> 00:17:08,966
Like a hit man?
A Benadryl hit man?
369
00:17:09,008 --> 00:17:11,272
Put it in the brownie
that she ate.
370
00:17:11,310 --> 00:17:12,868
Wait a minute,
why not put it in?
371
00:17:12,912 --> 00:17:16,143
- Put it in the brownie?
- That's a fucking brilliant idea.
372
00:17:16,182 --> 00:17:18,343
- A brilliant idea?
- Yeah, because...
373
00:17:18,384 --> 00:17:20,944
- yeah, it's a fucking...!
- What, the Benadryl brownie?
374
00:17:20,986 --> 00:17:23,284
First of all,
she will never know.
375
00:17:23,322 --> 00:17:26,120
I've got news for you.
Even if she got better,
376
00:17:26,158 --> 00:17:28,319
they would think it was
because of the prayer.
377
00:17:28,361 --> 00:17:30,329
That's fantastic.
378
00:17:30,363 --> 00:17:32,194
Well, I mean, you could do it,
it wouldn't be hard...
379
00:17:32,231 --> 00:17:34,495
What, are they
gonna throw me in prison?
380
00:17:34,533 --> 00:17:37,263
All I have to do is get
the recipe from Susie,
381
00:17:37,303 --> 00:17:41,000
Cheryl would bake them, put it in,
we'd just give her the brownie.
382
00:17:45,411 --> 00:17:48,312
- Larry, what are you doing here?
- Hey, you got a dog.
383
00:17:48,347 --> 00:17:52,078
Well we need protection.
It's me and Sammy in the house alone.
384
00:17:52,118 --> 00:17:54,109
He's a good boy.
This is Oscar.
385
00:17:54,153 --> 00:17:57,281
Oscar! Oskie-boy!
Hey, Oskie-boy!
386
00:17:57,323 --> 00:17:58,881
- Don't get him excited, okay?
- Okay.
387
00:17:58,924 --> 00:18:02,087
Yeah. You just stop by,
you don't call?
388
00:18:02,128 --> 00:18:05,222
No, I tried to call, but my cell phone
couldn't get through.
389
00:18:05,264 --> 00:18:07,289
- Interference.
- That's a piece of crap, that one.
390
00:18:07,333 --> 00:18:09,961
- I had that one, I got rid of it.
- Really?
391
00:18:10,002 --> 00:18:12,027
Who's that?
Isn't that somebody in the car?
392
00:18:12,071 --> 00:18:14,733
- It's Richard Lewis.
- Oh, oh...
393
00:18:14,774 --> 00:18:17,709
So, what?
What do you want?
394
00:18:17,743 --> 00:18:20,678
Actually, this may sound
a little strange,
395
00:18:20,713 --> 00:18:23,773
but we had a dinner party
the other night
396
00:18:23,816 --> 00:18:26,114
and Jeff brought over
some of your brownies...
397
00:18:26,152 --> 00:18:28,313
Wait a minute.
398
00:18:28,354 --> 00:18:32,313
Jeff brought brownies
that I made to a dinner party?
399
00:18:32,358 --> 00:18:36,089
- Yeah, at my house.
- Larry, I baked those brownies
400
00:18:36,128 --> 00:18:39,154
specifically for Sammy to take
to school the next day,
401
00:18:39,198 --> 00:18:41,996
and they were gone.
I had no idea what the hell happened.
402
00:18:42,034 --> 00:18:46,095
Jeff stole... he stole
his child's brownies, Larry.
403
00:18:46,138 --> 00:18:48,106
You see what we're
dealing with here?
404
00:18:48,140 --> 00:18:51,007
He stole brownies
out of the mouth of his baby.
405
00:18:51,043 --> 00:18:54,604
It's a testament to the brownie.
That's what you're not seeing.
406
00:18:54,647 --> 00:18:56,342
Because they're
incredible brownies.
407
00:18:56,382 --> 00:18:59,044
If they were mediocre brownies,
he wouldn't have taken them.
408
00:18:59,084 --> 00:19:01,416
- Well, that's true.
- Which leads me to why I'm here.
409
00:19:01,454 --> 00:19:05,754
I would love if you
could give me the recipe.
410
00:19:05,791 --> 00:19:07,725
- The brownie recipe?
- The brownie recipe.
411
00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:11,025
- I can't do that, darling, I can't.
- No, no, no, of course you can.
412
00:19:11,063 --> 00:19:13,463
No, I can't, because
it's a secret family recipe
413
00:19:13,499 --> 00:19:15,899
my grandmother
handed down to me, I can't.
414
00:19:15,935 --> 00:19:18,233
Susie, Susie, Susie.
Look who you're talking to here.
415
00:19:18,270 --> 00:19:19,828
I'm talking
to Larry David.
416
00:19:19,872 --> 00:19:23,069
Yeah, the guy who never
ever tells anybody anyth/ng.
417
00:19:23,108 --> 00:19:25,372
I am known for that.
Strangers come up to me
418
00:19:25,411 --> 00:19:27,971
to tell me
their deepest secrets.
419
00:19:28,013 --> 00:19:30,379
Well, that's good to know
for future reference
420
00:19:30,416 --> 00:19:32,748
for other things
that I might need to trust you with,
421
00:19:32,785 --> 00:19:34,912
but this is a secret.
What does that mean to you?
422
00:19:34,954 --> 00:19:37,218
Okay, okay,
secret, secret, secret.
423
00:19:37,256 --> 00:19:40,157
I'll tell you a secret, how about that?
Nobody knows, not even Cheryl.
424
00:19:40,192 --> 00:19:42,023
Well, if you'd
like to tell me.
425
00:19:42,061 --> 00:19:44,393
- I might be losing a testicle.
- You're kidding me.
426
00:19:44,430 --> 00:19:46,898
It's not definite.
The point is, I'm telling you,
427
00:19:46,932 --> 00:19:48,900
I'm sharing something with you
because I trust you.
428
00:19:48,934 --> 00:19:51,459
- The way you can trust me.
- I cannot give you the recipe.
429
00:19:51,504 --> 00:19:52,994
- No, you can.
- No, I can't.
430
00:19:53,038 --> 00:19:56,940
I can't. My grandmother, okay...
may she rest in peace...
431
00:19:56,976 --> 00:19:59,809
entrusted that
brownie recipe to me,
432
00:19:59,845 --> 00:20:03,281
and you're asking me to break
a sacred confidence.
433
00:20:03,315 --> 00:20:05,510
It's not The Manhattan Project,
you know?!
434
00:20:05,551 --> 00:20:07,314
It's just a little... a recipe.
435
00:20:07,353 --> 00:20:09,821
Go get a mix or something!
You're asking too much.
436
00:20:09,855 --> 00:20:13,052
You ask way too much.
I can't. Oscar, come.
437
00:20:13,092 --> 00:20:15,083
I just told you
I'm gonna lose a ball!
438
00:20:20,132 --> 00:20:22,896
Okay, so...
439
00:20:22,935 --> 00:20:26,564
you want to put some Benadryl
in some brownies?
440
00:20:26,605 --> 00:20:29,039
A lot of Benadryl.
441
00:20:30,442 --> 00:20:32,501
Are you kidding?
442
00:20:32,545 --> 00:20:34,206
What's the downside?
443
00:20:34,246 --> 00:20:37,010
Think of it, it's like...
it's an act of humanity
444
00:20:37,049 --> 00:20:39,279
on your part.
I'm begging you.
445
00:20:39,318 --> 00:20:42,845
Aren't you guys supposed to be going
to the Emmys tomorrow night?
446
00:20:42,888 --> 00:20:45,755
- Why? What?
- Richard...?
447
00:20:45,791 --> 00:20:48,282
Is that what this is about, Larry?
Because you don't want
448
00:20:48,327 --> 00:20:50,557
to take her to the Emmys
because of the way she looks?
449
00:20:50,596 --> 00:20:54,123
Why should he take her?
She's hideous. I don't blame him.
450
00:20:54,166 --> 00:20:56,100
Are you guys
out of your mind?!
451
00:20:56,135 --> 00:20:58,103
Why?
452
00:20:58,137 --> 00:21:00,765
It's not only that.
I want her to get better.
453
00:21:00,806 --> 00:21:03,468
It's 90%.
You don't have to lie to her...
454
00:21:03,509 --> 00:21:06,808
- It's not 90-10.
- It's 85-15.
455
00:21:06,845 --> 00:21:09,211
- No, no, 75-25.
- It's not even that.
456
00:21:09,248 --> 00:21:11,808
Tell her the truth. You're embarrassed
to be seen with her,
457
00:21:11,850 --> 00:21:14,444
and I don't blame him. So what?
She takes a little Benadryl,
458
00:21:14,486 --> 00:21:16,750
you put it in
the brownie, big deal.
459
00:21:16,789 --> 00:21:19,917
Why don't you buy some brownies,
put it in and leave me out of this?
460
00:21:19,959 --> 00:21:22,792
- We went over this.
- You know anything about tampering?
461
00:21:22,828 --> 00:21:26,389
Huh? Do you know anything
about tampering?
462
00:21:26,432 --> 00:21:29,993
You can't do that
because the brownie will fall apart.
463
00:21:30,035 --> 00:21:33,368
It's gotta be in the mix
when you make the brownie.
464
00:21:33,405 --> 00:21:35,771
Maybe you guys should
take care of this yourself...
465
00:21:35,808 --> 00:21:38,038
- How can we...?
- I can't bake.
466
00:21:38,077 --> 00:21:40,045
- Leave me out of this.
- I don't know how to bake.
467
00:21:40,079 --> 00:21:43,480
What do you mean? They have
to be baked. They have to be baked.
468
00:21:43,515 --> 00:21:46,416
Don't you think she's gonna
taste Benadryl in the brownies?
469
00:21:46,452 --> 00:21:48,920
It's totally tasteless.
There's no taste to this stuff.
470
00:21:48,954 --> 00:21:52,583
There's no taste to it.
I spoke to the pharmacist.
471
00:21:52,625 --> 00:21:54,422
Oh, you asked him
if you put this in brownies,
472
00:21:54,460 --> 00:21:56,360
will someone be able
to taste it?
473
00:21:56,395 --> 00:21:58,989
There's no taste
to it at all.
474
00:21:59,031 --> 00:22:01,056
They're odorless
and tasteless.
475
00:22:01,100 --> 00:22:03,091
My heart is breaking
for her big head.
476
00:22:03,135 --> 00:22:06,070
It's grotesque. It's like she should be
in a carnival on Coney Island,
477
00:22:06,105 --> 00:22:07,800
I'm telling you.
478
00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:11,276
This is the dumbest idea
I have heard in a long time.
479
00:22:11,310 --> 00:22:14,279
You know what?
It's a good idea, 'cause if it works,
480
00:22:14,313 --> 00:22:16,372
she thinks the prayer did it.
481
00:22:16,415 --> 00:22:18,679
That's what's
so smart about it.
482
00:22:18,717 --> 00:22:20,480
Now the idea is a genius idea.
483
00:22:20,519 --> 00:22:22,783
It's not like, "How did I get better
all of a sudden?"
484
00:22:22,821 --> 00:22:25,255
- It was their religion.
- Yeah, it was their religion.
485
00:22:25,290 --> 00:22:26,882
- Prayer worked.
- Yeah.
486
00:22:26,925 --> 00:22:29,519
And you know what?
It happened in our house.
487
00:22:32,464 --> 00:22:34,227
- Okay.
- Okay.
488
00:22:34,266 --> 00:22:36,234
All right, I think
we should... you know.
489
00:22:36,268 --> 00:22:38,236
All right, I just want to talk
to her for a second.
490
00:22:38,270 --> 00:22:40,636
All right. Cheryl?
491
00:22:42,207 --> 00:22:45,472
All right, thanks for doing this.
I guess this is stupid.
492
00:22:45,511 --> 00:22:49,174
- Do you not think this is stupid?
- It's not such a big deal.
493
00:22:49,214 --> 00:22:52,183
Let's not make a big deal about it,
okay? It's not really a big deal.
494
00:22:52,217 --> 00:22:55,448
- It's another day in paradise for me.
- Don't do it, if that's how you feel.
495
00:22:55,487 --> 00:22:57,614
No, I'll do it,
I'll do it, just go.
496
00:22:57,656 --> 00:23:00,386
Can you bake this stuff?
I don't even know, can you bake?
497
00:23:00,426 --> 00:23:02,951
Can you? I've never seen you
bake anything, I'm sorry.
498
00:23:02,995 --> 00:23:05,293
Please?
499
00:23:14,173 --> 00:23:18,337
Got some brownies for Deborah.
My wife baked them.
500
00:23:18,377 --> 00:23:20,311
I'll take them to her.
501
00:23:20,345 --> 00:23:22,711
Hey, you know what?
502
00:23:22,748 --> 00:23:24,841
We'd like to, bring her...
503
00:23:24,883 --> 00:23:27,181
If it's all
the same to you.
504
00:23:27,219 --> 00:23:29,153
I would really like to see
the look on her face
505
00:23:29,188 --> 00:23:31,816
when I give these to her.
It would mean a lot to me.
506
00:23:31,857 --> 00:23:34,792
- Me, too.
- Just for one minute.
507
00:23:34,827 --> 00:23:37,193
Sure. Absolutely.
508
00:23:37,229 --> 00:23:39,629
Thank you very much.
509
00:23:41,900 --> 00:23:44,835
- Hi, honey.
- Hi.
510
00:23:44,870 --> 00:23:46,667
You look... you know.
511
00:23:46,705 --> 00:23:48,935
- Yeah?
- I love you.
512
00:23:48,974 --> 00:23:51,966
- Hi, Larry.
- Look at what "Uncle Larry" brought.
513
00:23:52,010 --> 00:23:54,877
- What is that?
- A little treat.
514
00:23:54,913 --> 00:23:58,246
- Surprise.
- Brownies...!
515
00:23:58,283 --> 00:24:02,185
Brownies.
No peanuts.
516
00:24:02,221 --> 00:24:03,483
- Thank the Lord.
517
00:24:03,522 --> 00:24:06,821
The ones from
the other night? Oh...
518
00:24:06,859 --> 00:24:08,952
My wife got the recipe.
519
00:24:08,994 --> 00:24:12,054
Cheryl got
the recipe? Oh...
520
00:24:12,097 --> 00:24:14,031
- Take it.
- Oh, jeez.
521
00:24:14,066 --> 00:24:15,658
Go ahead,
take a little taste.
522
00:24:15,701 --> 00:24:18,727
Oh,
thank you so much.
523
00:24:18,771 --> 00:24:21,899
- Go ahead. Take a bite.
- Mmm, huh?
524
00:24:21,940 --> 00:24:23,931
Huh, what do you think?
You like that?
525
00:24:23,976 --> 00:24:26,467
- Hmm...
- Like a little girl again, huh?
526
00:24:26,512 --> 00:24:29,913
You know,
they're not quite the same.
527
00:24:29,948 --> 00:24:31,575
- No, they're the same.
- Um-umm.
528
00:24:31,617 --> 00:24:33,812
- Yeah, yeah.
- Um-umm.
529
00:24:33,852 --> 00:24:35,752
- Yeah, yeah.
- Honey, just try another one.
530
00:24:35,788 --> 00:24:38,052
Tell Cheryl I said thank you
for making the effort,
531
00:24:38,090 --> 00:24:40,058
but those are
really not the same.
532
00:24:40,092 --> 00:24:44,051
What are you talking about?
They're delicious, eat it. It's good.
533
00:24:44,096 --> 00:24:45,961
It's good, take it.
534
00:24:45,998 --> 00:24:47,989
These are definitely
not the same brownies.
535
00:24:48,033 --> 00:24:50,001
Not the same brownies?
It's the same brownie!
536
00:24:50,035 --> 00:24:51,627
They're definitely not the same.
537
00:24:51,670 --> 00:24:54,195
Believe me, they're the same brownie.
My wife baked them.
538
00:24:54,239 --> 00:24:56,537
- I know what she baked.
- These really suck.
539
00:24:56,575 --> 00:25:00,204
I can't believe that she doesn't know
the difference between sugar and salt.
540
00:25:00,245 --> 00:25:03,544
- How dare you insult my wife's baking!
- There's something different...
541
00:25:03,582 --> 00:25:06,449
- All right.
- Fine, fine, you know what? Fine.
542
00:25:06,485 --> 00:25:09,716
Save them for later,
save it.
543
00:25:09,755 --> 00:25:13,418
What do you want me to say,
Larry? They're horrible!
544
00:25:13,458 --> 00:25:16,723
What time are you picking me up
tomorrow night for the Emmys?
545
00:25:20,699 --> 00:25:23,099
I feel like nothing's
happening, wait.
546
00:25:23,135 --> 00:25:26,502
Okay, wait, Larry
actually wrote down...
547
00:25:26,538 --> 00:25:28,096
Oh, my God.
548
00:25:28,140 --> 00:25:31,803
He wrote down
directions for me, because...
549
00:25:31,844 --> 00:25:34,813
- we...
- Hit the red button.
550
00:25:35,881 --> 00:25:39,874
- This is pitiful...
- No, no, Larry!
551
00:25:39,918 --> 00:25:42,682
This is so not...
552
00:25:42,721 --> 00:25:44,689
What?
553
00:25:44,723 --> 00:25:46,918
I can't get
the satellite to go on.
554
00:25:46,959 --> 00:25:49,951
It was working yesterday,
just follow the instructions!
555
00:25:49,995 --> 00:25:52,759
Just get in here
and fix the damn thing!
556
00:25:52,798 --> 00:25:55,733
We're missing Joan!
557
00:25:55,767 --> 00:25:58,736
We're missing
the Emmy Pre-Show with...
558
00:25:58,770 --> 00:26:02,228
I just...
559
00:26:02,274 --> 00:26:04,834
This is just so pathetic.
560
00:26:04,877 --> 00:26:08,176
You can't wait three hours?
lt'll come on regular TV.
561
00:26:08,213 --> 00:26:10,738
We want to watch it
when the New Yorkers watch it.
562
00:26:10,782 --> 00:26:13,342
We need to see the Pre-Show with Joan.
We're missing that now.
563
00:26:13,385 --> 00:26:15,353
We need to see
what everyone's wearing.
564
00:26:15,387 --> 00:26:17,218
That's the best part.
565
00:26:17,256 --> 00:26:19,918
What was that
business I saw you... yesterday?
566
00:26:19,958 --> 00:26:22,290
- At the coffee shop?
- What business?
567
00:26:22,327 --> 00:26:26,889
The business with the black guy.
You fixed his tip?
568
00:26:26,932 --> 00:26:28,957
- What happened?
- So? Yeah.
569
00:26:29,001 --> 00:26:33,335
What do you mean, "So"?
You didn't know? Larry's a tip profiler.
570
00:26:33,372 --> 00:26:36,068
- Fixed a black man's tip.
- He didn't leave enough.
571
00:26:36,108 --> 00:26:37,871
What am I supposed to do?
572
00:26:37,910 --> 00:26:41,209
You trying to get a NAACP
lmage Award or something?
573
00:26:41,246 --> 00:26:45,376
If it wasn't a racial thing,
why'd you do it behind his back?
574
00:26:45,417 --> 00:26:47,783
I didn't do it
behind his back!
575
00:26:47,819 --> 00:26:50,253
He tiptoed back
into the restaurant. Tippy-toed.
576
00:26:50,289 --> 00:26:52,553
- I did not!
- You should've seen it.
577
00:26:52,591 --> 00:26:54,582
I didn't tiptoe,
he stormed out in a huff!
578
00:26:54,626 --> 00:26:57,459
I would've done it right in front
of his face, but he stormed out.
579
00:26:57,496 --> 00:27:00,897
- Well, why'd he storm out?
- Because I fired him.
580
00:27:00,933 --> 00:27:03,663
You fired him?
You fired him?!
581
00:27:03,702 --> 00:27:06,102
Why'd you fire
the black man?
582
00:27:06,138 --> 00:27:09,505
I fired the black man
583
00:27:09,541 --> 00:27:12,977
because he's the guy
who set up the whole system here
584
00:27:13,011 --> 00:27:16,469
and it doesn't work.
He's here every week,
585
00:27:16,515 --> 00:27:18,983
I'm giving him checks.
We've got five remotes,
586
00:27:19,017 --> 00:27:21,918
I can't turn it on, but I know,
you know, "Black man,
587
00:27:21,954 --> 00:27:24,149
he can never
do anything wrong,
588
00:27:24,189 --> 00:27:26,623
and he shouldn't
get fired from a job.
589
00:27:26,658 --> 00:27:28,853
Black people always
do everything right."
590
00:27:28,894 --> 00:27:32,660
You gotta turn the damn satellite
on for the TV to work.
591
00:27:32,698 --> 00:27:36,532
See the little green light?
Just gotta turn it on.
592
00:27:36,568 --> 00:27:39,901
Or you can fire the black man.
Whatever works for you.
593
00:27:39,938 --> 00:27:42,532
Jessica Alba and her fianc�...
594
00:27:43,542 --> 00:27:45,442
Great,
thank you.
595
00:27:45,477 --> 00:27:46,705
- Thanks, Larry.
- Thank you.
596
00:27:48,680 --> 00:27:51,808
Who's that?
Jane Kaczmarek?
597
00:27:51,850 --> 00:27:53,681
Yeah,
she's funny.
598
00:27:53,719 --> 00:27:56,085
There's Kelsey Grammer
and his girlfriend.
599
00:27:56,121 --> 00:27:59,852
Thank you, Kelsey. Kelsey Grammer,
ladies and gentlemen,
600
00:27:59,891 --> 00:28:01,859
one of the greats
of our community.
601
00:28:01,893 --> 00:28:03,986
Oh, my God, there's Richard!
602
00:28:04,029 --> 00:28:05,929
It's Richard Lewis.
Richard, over here!
603
00:28:05,964 --> 00:28:09,661
Richard, Richard!
Come on, it's Joan!
604
00:28:09,701 --> 00:28:12,465
Just get over here,
it's so good to see you...
605
00:28:12,504 --> 00:28:15,098
oh, my God.
606
00:28:15,140 --> 00:28:17,973
I've seen better faces
on a hemorrhoid.
607
00:28:19,177 --> 00:28:21,168
When E.T. called home,
did you pick up the phone?
608
00:28:21,213 --> 00:28:23,408
Excuse me.
609
00:28:23,448 --> 00:28:25,541
How are things
in Loch Ness?
49391
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