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1
00:00:14,633 --> 00:00:16,500
( Whispering )
2
00:00:18,367 --> 00:00:20,467
I'm so sorry.
3
00:00:20,500 --> 00:00:22,033
Thank you so much for coming.
4
00:00:22,067 --> 00:00:23,633
It's so good to see you.
5
00:00:23,667 --> 00:00:25,600
Thank you so much.
6
00:00:25,633 --> 00:00:27,000
Thank you.
7
00:00:27,033 --> 00:00:31,133
( Female ) oh, gosh,
thank you, thank you.
8
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:35,700
Larry, I'm so sorry
about your aunt.
9
00:00:35,733 --> 00:00:37,933
Oh, you know what?
It was Cheryl's aunt.
10
00:00:37,967 --> 00:00:39,567
But thank you.
11
00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:41,433
Did you fly in from Florida?
12
00:00:41,467 --> 00:00:42,833
No, no, no,
13
00:00:42,867 --> 00:00:45,076
her sister and her sister's
boyfriend and her parents flew in.
14
00:00:45,100 --> 00:00:46,200
I live here.
15
00:00:46,233 --> 00:00:47,267
Oh, I see.
16
00:00:47,300 --> 00:00:48,367
Condolences.
17
00:00:55,867 --> 00:00:57,033
Nice service.
18
00:00:57,067 --> 00:00:58,300
Yeah.
19
00:00:58,333 --> 00:01:00,600
Thanks for the hotel room.
20
00:01:00,633 --> 00:01:02,067
I appreciate that.
21
00:01:02,100 --> 00:01:03,933
Please, my pleasure.
22
00:01:03,967 --> 00:01:05,767
It's, uh, I was gonna ask you,
23
00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:07,567
is that mini bar,
24
00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:10,100
is that included
with the whole thing?
25
00:01:10,133 --> 00:01:11,300
Sure, whatever you want.
26
00:01:11,333 --> 00:01:12,367
Oh, great.
27
00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:13,433
Yeah, help yourself.
28
00:01:13,467 --> 00:01:16,267
Some M&M's, you know, toblerone.
29
00:01:16,300 --> 00:01:17,767
I don't drink.
30
00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:19,533
It's chocolate.
31
00:01:21,100 --> 00:01:23,133
How's, uh, how's
Cheryl holding up?
32
00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:25,066
I think she's okay.
33
00:01:25,067 --> 00:01:26,300
Yeah.
34
00:01:26,333 --> 00:01:28,933
Cut my finger this morning
trying to put that, uh,
35
00:01:28,967 --> 00:01:30,800
make a hole in my belt.
36
00:01:30,833 --> 00:01:33,867
So I must have
lost weight or something.
37
00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:35,467
It's killing me.
38
00:01:38,267 --> 00:01:40,767
Well, uh, it's a good family.
39
00:01:40,800 --> 00:01:42,433
Yeah, they're very nice.
40
00:01:42,467 --> 00:01:44,066
Becky's a nice girl, right?
41
00:01:44,067 --> 00:01:46,867
Becky? Yeah, she's a doll,
she's really sweet.
42
00:01:46,900 --> 00:01:48,833
How, how long
did you date before
43
00:01:48,867 --> 00:01:51,500
you and Cheryl got married?
44
00:01:53,067 --> 00:01:54,933
Not that long, really.
45
00:01:54,967 --> 00:01:57,467
We were friends for awhile
and then, you know,
46
00:01:57,500 --> 00:02:01,367
after we had intercourse
we got married very quickly.
47
00:02:02,467 --> 00:02:04,600
Becky really
wants to get married.
48
00:02:06,433 --> 00:02:10,500
And uh, I'm just not,
I'm not into it.
49
00:02:10,533 --> 00:02:13,867
And, uh, the day
that we got the call,
50
00:02:13,900 --> 00:02:15,500
I was actually gonna break up,
51
00:02:15,533 --> 00:02:18,700
I was over there
to break up with Becky.
52
00:02:18,733 --> 00:02:21,600
Holy cow, so you flew out here
53
00:02:21,633 --> 00:02:24,433
and you wanted
to already be free.
54
00:02:24,467 --> 00:02:26,300
I missed it...
55
00:02:26,333 --> 00:02:29,133
Like, by five minutes.
56
00:02:29,167 --> 00:02:30,467
Oh, my gosh.
57
00:02:30,500 --> 00:02:33,800
And then you couldn't do it
after she killed herself.
58
00:02:33,833 --> 00:02:36,667
What do think would be
the appropriate time
59
00:02:36,700 --> 00:02:39,300
for somebody
to wait 'til they...?
60
00:02:39,333 --> 00:02:40,367
Uh-huh.
61
00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:43,067
'Til I tell her?
62
00:02:43,100 --> 00:02:45,533
If it was her mother,
I would say you'd have to
63
00:02:45,567 --> 00:02:48,500
go back on the plane
and wait maybe six days.
64
00:02:48,533 --> 00:02:50,267
A week.
65
00:02:50,300 --> 00:02:52,367
For an aunt?
66
00:02:52,400 --> 00:02:54,633
For an aunt who doesn't
even live where you live,
67
00:02:54,667 --> 00:02:57,200
who you don't see that often,
68
00:02:57,233 --> 00:03:00,066
I think you could do it
when you get home,
69
00:03:00,067 --> 00:03:03,067
when you get back,
when you get back to Florida.
70
00:03:03,100 --> 00:03:05,600
What should I say? I mean...
71
00:03:05,633 --> 00:03:07,500
Just tell her you're not happy.
72
00:03:07,533 --> 00:03:08,867
That's very good, that works.
73
00:03:08,900 --> 00:03:11,867
I've never actually used it
myself, but I think it works.
74
00:03:11,900 --> 00:03:13,066
Okay.
75
00:03:13,067 --> 00:03:14,500
I've got a breath
problem, what...?
76
00:03:14,533 --> 00:03:17,667
No, I thought I saw
a bug, that's creepy.
77
00:03:17,700 --> 00:03:20,433
Aright, listen, we never had
this conversation, by the way.
78
00:03:20,467 --> 00:03:21,967
No.
79
00:03:22,067 --> 00:03:23,300
Okay?
80
00:03:23,333 --> 00:03:25,167
I won't say anything.
81
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,167
( Fly buzzing )
82
00:03:27,200 --> 00:03:29,300
Thanks for your advice.
83
00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:33,567
Wow, I think I got the heat, uh,
84
00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:35,667
turned down a bit.
85
00:03:35,700 --> 00:03:38,167
What were you and Craig
talking about?
86
00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:39,433
Louise.
87
00:03:39,467 --> 00:03:40,467
Is he okay?
88
00:03:40,500 --> 00:03:41,933
Oh, yeah.
89
00:03:41,967 --> 00:03:44,600
You would be very surprised
how broken up he is about this.
90
00:03:44,633 --> 00:03:46,043
He's been very,
very quiet for several days.
91
00:03:46,067 --> 00:03:47,100
That's so sweet.
92
00:03:47,133 --> 00:03:50,300
The service was wonderful,
wasn't it?
93
00:03:50,333 --> 00:03:51,600
Yeah, it worked out nicely.
94
00:03:51,633 --> 00:03:52,767
Well, thank you.
95
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:55,133
You know what?
Hey, listen, you guys, um,
96
00:03:55,167 --> 00:03:57,200
I want you to know
if you want to stay
97
00:03:57,233 --> 00:03:58,667
a couple of extra days
in the house,
98
00:03:58,700 --> 00:04:00,233
that's fine,
don't worry about it.
99
00:04:00,267 --> 00:04:04,433
You could stay another day
in the hotel.
100
00:04:04,467 --> 00:04:06,567
Oh, that's really nice.
101
00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:07,967
Stay there a night or two.
102
00:04:08,067 --> 00:04:09,600
Yeah, one night.
103
00:04:09,633 --> 00:04:10,943
That would be nice,
because we hate flying.
104
00:04:10,967 --> 00:04:11,933
Neither of us like to fly.
105
00:04:11,967 --> 00:04:13,467
Yeah, hey, nobody likes to fly.
106
00:04:13,500 --> 00:04:15,600
I don't even like to drive.
107
00:04:15,633 --> 00:04:17,367
And I don't like walking.
108
00:04:17,400 --> 00:04:19,333
So occasionally,
I don't really know
109
00:04:19,367 --> 00:04:22,267
what mode of transportation to...
110
00:04:22,300 --> 00:04:24,300
I don't know if we can
do anything about this,
111
00:04:24,333 --> 00:04:27,067
but we were a little upset
that there was no obituary.
112
00:04:27,100 --> 00:04:28,443
Oh, wow, I didn't even
think of that.
113
00:04:28,467 --> 00:04:31,300
Like she didn't have
a life out here, you know?
114
00:04:31,333 --> 00:04:33,800
It sort of makes it real.
115
00:04:33,833 --> 00:04:35,600
You know, my friend,
uh, my manager
116
00:04:35,633 --> 00:04:37,367
actually knows
somebody at the paper.
117
00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,300
I'll bet I could get
something in there for you.
118
00:04:39,333 --> 00:04:40,433
That would be so good.
119
00:04:40,467 --> 00:04:42,633
That'd be really sweet.
120
00:04:42,667 --> 00:04:44,367
You know what?
I'll write it myself.
121
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:45,900
I'll take care
of the whole thing.
122
00:04:45,933 --> 00:04:47,100
No problem.
123
00:04:47,133 --> 00:04:48,409
There's anything
you want to add,
124
00:04:48,433 --> 00:04:49,909
you just tell me about it,
and I'll get it in.
125
00:04:49,933 --> 00:04:51,867
It's not gonna be funny, is it?
126
00:04:51,900 --> 00:04:52,933
Mom, please.
127
00:04:52,967 --> 00:04:55,066
( Mom ) well, that's
what he does.
128
00:04:55,067 --> 00:04:56,109
No, it's not gonna be funny.
129
00:04:56,133 --> 00:04:57,867
It'll be very tasteful
and appropriate.
130
00:04:57,900 --> 00:04:59,367
Don't worry, it'll be fine.
131
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:00,476
He's just a writer,
he can do anything.
132
00:05:00,500 --> 00:05:02,633
Thank you so much.
133
00:05:02,667 --> 00:05:04,667
We love you, Larry.
134
00:05:04,700 --> 00:05:06,367
I love you, too.
135
00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:14,067
Hey.
136
00:05:14,100 --> 00:05:15,133
Hey!
137
00:05:15,167 --> 00:05:16,433
Sorry I'm late.
138
00:05:16,467 --> 00:05:17,900
Hey, it's understandable.
139
00:05:17,933 --> 00:05:20,933
It's very hard to extricate
myself from Warner's.
140
00:05:20,967 --> 00:05:22,076
Why are you still
wearing the tie?
141
00:05:22,100 --> 00:05:23,143
You don't have to
wear it anymore.
142
00:05:23,167 --> 00:05:24,533
I don't know.
143
00:05:24,567 --> 00:05:26,067
If I didn't have to, I wouldn't.
144
00:05:26,100 --> 00:05:27,867
Well, I mean, once
you've got the outfit on,
145
00:05:27,900 --> 00:05:31,100
you might as well just
wear it to its completion.
146
00:05:31,133 --> 00:05:32,300
Maintain the outfit.
147
00:05:32,333 --> 00:05:33,467
"To its completion."
148
00:05:33,500 --> 00:05:34,933
Yeah.
149
00:05:34,967 --> 00:05:36,800
Hey, so you think
you can take care of this,
150
00:05:36,833 --> 00:05:38,533
this obituary thing?
151
00:05:38,567 --> 00:05:39,733
Really? Done deal, man.
152
00:05:39,767 --> 00:05:41,267
4:00 is the deadline.
153
00:05:41,300 --> 00:05:43,767
You get it to me by 4:00
and I'll get it to him.
154
00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:44,833
I'll fax it over.
155
00:05:44,867 --> 00:05:46,167
No problem. Thanks so much.
156
00:05:46,200 --> 00:05:47,300
Very nice of you.
157
00:05:47,333 --> 00:05:48,833
Oh, well, it's my pleasure.
158
00:05:48,867 --> 00:05:50,800
That'll score some big points
with the family.
159
00:05:50,833 --> 00:05:52,267
How did she die?
160
00:05:52,300 --> 00:05:53,300
Killed herself.
161
00:05:53,333 --> 00:05:54,400
No, she didn't.
162
00:05:54,433 --> 00:05:55,667
Killed herself...
163
00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:56,733
Why?
164
00:05:56,767 --> 00:05:59,433
Why? Nobody knows,
she didn't leave a note.
165
00:05:59,467 --> 00:06:00,600
That is so rude, isn't that?
166
00:06:00,633 --> 00:06:01,700
That's really rude.
167
00:06:01,733 --> 00:06:03,343
I mean, if you leave
your house for 10 minutes
168
00:06:03,367 --> 00:06:05,066
to go get a container of milk,
169
00:06:05,067 --> 00:06:06,867
you tell somebody
where you went, don't you?
170
00:06:06,900 --> 00:06:08,867
I leave my wife a note
before I go anywhere.
171
00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:11,700
Yeah, would it have killed her
to leave a note?
172
00:06:11,733 --> 00:06:12,700
I don't know.
173
00:06:12,733 --> 00:06:15,467
Uh, my mom's in town
with my dad.
174
00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:16,767
It's her birthday.
175
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:18,100
It'd be great,
176
00:06:18,133 --> 00:06:20,143
considering all that's gone down
between you and my parents,
177
00:06:20,167 --> 00:06:22,909
if, for my mom's birthday, you got her
a little gift, a little something.
178
00:06:22,933 --> 00:06:25,967
Doesn't matter what it is,
it's a nice gesture.
179
00:06:26,067 --> 00:06:27,667
It really is.
180
00:06:27,700 --> 00:06:29,400
Any ideas?
181
00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:32,967
No.
182
00:06:34,067 --> 00:06:35,433
Okay.
183
00:06:35,467 --> 00:06:36,767
Good.
184
00:06:36,800 --> 00:06:38,066
Hey, let's do this
obituary thing, okay?
185
00:06:38,067 --> 00:06:39,067
Alright.
186
00:06:39,100 --> 00:06:40,100
You have a pad?
187
00:06:40,133 --> 00:06:42,067
Okay. Yeah, I got a pad.
188
00:06:43,067 --> 00:06:44,633
Um, Louise hoenin.
189
00:06:44,667 --> 00:06:46,433
H-o-e-n-i-n.
190
00:06:46,467 --> 00:06:49,200
Devoted sister,
191
00:06:49,233 --> 00:06:51,833
beloved aunt.
192
00:06:52,700 --> 00:06:55,533
Died of undisclosed causes...
193
00:06:59,833 --> 00:07:02,700
It only took us about
20 minutes, door to door.
194
00:07:02,733 --> 00:07:04,167
Did very well.
195
00:07:04,200 --> 00:07:05,209
( Male ) yeah, that's unusual.
196
00:07:05,233 --> 00:07:06,633
I wasn't worried
197
00:07:06,667 --> 00:07:09,567
because I have unlimited
mileage on my rental car.
198
00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:11,267
I wouldn't care how long it was.
199
00:07:11,300 --> 00:07:12,433
( Male ) that's good.
200
00:07:12,467 --> 00:07:15,767
We were surprised the freeway
was virtually empty.
201
00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:18,567
You can really get stuck
in traffic for hours.
202
00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:19,800
Yeah.
203
00:07:19,833 --> 00:07:22,733
Sometimes it gets so bad
you can hardly breathe.
204
00:07:24,467 --> 00:07:26,933
I'm glad I don't live here.
205
00:07:26,967 --> 00:07:29,100
Do you think Becky's
coming down pretty soon?
206
00:07:29,133 --> 00:07:30,733
Oh, I think so.
207
00:07:30,767 --> 00:07:33,467
She's been on the phone
all morning with her, uh,
208
00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:35,867
boyfriend, well,
now her ex-boyfriend.
209
00:07:35,900 --> 00:07:39,467
He broke up with her
last night and...
210
00:07:39,500 --> 00:07:41,967
Isn't that awful?
211
00:07:42,067 --> 00:07:46,600
I mean, what kind of timing...
It's unbelievable.
212
00:07:46,633 --> 00:07:47,867
( Female ) lousy.
213
00:07:51,233 --> 00:07:53,633
So I think I'm gonna
go out for awhile.
214
00:07:53,667 --> 00:07:54,633
Is that okay?
215
00:07:54,667 --> 00:07:56,067
Where are you going?
216
00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:58,066
I was thinking about
playing some golf.
217
00:07:58,067 --> 00:08:00,533
Are you joking?
218
00:08:00,567 --> 00:08:02,700
Well, I'm not contributing
anything here.
219
00:08:02,733 --> 00:08:04,066
Yes, you are. I'm detracting.
220
00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:05,567
I'm a minus here,
I'm not a plus.
221
00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:07,066
If your aunt died,
222
00:08:07,067 --> 00:08:09,667
I would be right by your side
to support you.
223
00:08:09,700 --> 00:08:11,133
Hey, if my aunt killed herself,
224
00:08:11,167 --> 00:08:12,943
I would be encouraging you
to leave the house.
225
00:08:12,967 --> 00:08:14,133
I'd say go, go have some fun.
226
00:08:14,167 --> 00:08:16,400
You don't have to
stay here and mourn.
227
00:08:16,433 --> 00:08:17,900
I would keep you
around to mourn?
228
00:08:17,933 --> 00:08:19,733
You're not going golfing.
229
00:08:22,167 --> 00:08:23,876
Well, I know we're all
going to miss Louise.
230
00:08:23,900 --> 00:08:25,700
Oh, yeah.
231
00:08:25,733 --> 00:08:27,067
Very much so.
232
00:08:27,100 --> 00:08:28,100
Mm-hmm.
233
00:08:28,133 --> 00:08:29,800
But we have to continue.
234
00:08:29,833 --> 00:08:31,567
We must go on.
235
00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:33,367
( Larry ) we must go on.
236
00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:36,633
Can't go on.
237
00:08:36,667 --> 00:08:39,133
Must go on.
238
00:08:41,900 --> 00:08:45,066
Well, you know,
laughter is a great healer
239
00:08:45,067 --> 00:08:47,267
and you've gotta have a smile.
240
00:08:47,300 --> 00:08:51,367
You know, you get over
a lot of things that way.
241
00:08:51,400 --> 00:08:53,867
Yeah, I once performed
for Norman cousins
242
00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:56,267
in his hospital room
when he was on his deathbed.
243
00:08:56,300 --> 00:08:58,200
He requested me
to do five minutes.
244
00:08:58,233 --> 00:09:01,900
And, uh, I bombed, actually,
245
00:09:01,933 --> 00:09:03,267
and he got much worse
246
00:09:03,300 --> 00:09:05,733
and he had to watch
some Marx brothers movies
247
00:09:05,767 --> 00:09:07,600
to actually
resuscitate him, but...
248
00:09:07,633 --> 00:09:10,700
You know who's funny?
That carrot top.
249
00:09:10,733 --> 00:09:12,333
Have you seen that guy?
250
00:09:12,367 --> 00:09:14,733
He comes on the tonight show
once in awhile.
251
00:09:14,767 --> 00:09:16,967
Big mop of red hair.
252
00:09:17,067 --> 00:09:18,700
Oh, my gosh!
253
00:09:18,733 --> 00:09:21,933
The obituary!
Do we have the paper?
254
00:09:21,967 --> 00:09:23,733
Oh, yeah, we want
to look at that.
255
00:09:23,767 --> 00:09:25,066
Okay.
256
00:09:25,067 --> 00:09:26,733
I'll go get the paper.
257
00:09:26,767 --> 00:09:28,667
No, don't you bother,
I've got the car.
258
00:09:28,700 --> 00:09:30,933
You don't even know where it is.
259
00:09:30,967 --> 00:09:33,433
I have unlimited mileage,
I can drive anywhere.
260
00:09:33,467 --> 00:09:34,733
No, he knows what he's doing.
261
00:09:34,767 --> 00:09:36,600
It's right around the corner,
he'll find it.
262
00:09:36,633 --> 00:09:38,333
I'm sure he will.
263
00:09:38,367 --> 00:09:40,733
Gives him pleasure
to use the rental car.
264
00:09:40,767 --> 00:09:42,200
Mm-hmm.
265
00:09:42,233 --> 00:09:44,100
You could move over
a little bit now
266
00:09:44,133 --> 00:09:45,933
because he's not
sitting there anymore.
267
00:09:45,967 --> 00:09:47,066
Get a little more room here.
268
00:09:47,067 --> 00:09:49,467
Oh, that's okay.
269
00:09:53,567 --> 00:09:54,533
These are pretty good.
270
00:09:54,567 --> 00:09:55,967
Yeah.
271
00:09:56,067 --> 00:09:58,367
How many do you think I can
get in my mouth at one time?
272
00:09:58,400 --> 00:09:59,433
Six.
273
00:09:59,467 --> 00:10:00,467
You say six?
274
00:10:00,500 --> 00:10:01,500
( Female ) five.
275
00:10:01,533 --> 00:10:04,067
Three, four.
276
00:10:08,667 --> 00:10:12,100
( As Brando ) look what
they did to my Santino.
277
00:10:13,133 --> 00:10:14,933
Gladys, George...
278
00:10:14,967 --> 00:10:16,000
Look what they did.
279
00:10:16,033 --> 00:10:17,067
Oh, sugar.
280
00:10:17,100 --> 00:10:18,800
Oh, no, Becky.
281
00:10:18,833 --> 00:10:20,233
Oh, no.
282
00:10:20,267 --> 00:10:21,933
Oh, my gosh.
283
00:10:22,967 --> 00:10:25,667
Oh, what did he say?
What happened?
284
00:10:25,700 --> 00:10:29,133
He just kept repeating something
about not being happy.
285
00:10:29,167 --> 00:10:30,967
We could've worked through that.
286
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:32,000
The nerve of this guy!
287
00:10:32,033 --> 00:10:33,067
Jerk.
288
00:10:33,100 --> 00:10:34,833
What kind of timing is this?
289
00:10:34,867 --> 00:10:36,300
I just buried my aunt!
290
00:10:36,333 --> 00:10:37,300
I know.
291
00:10:37,333 --> 00:10:39,233
And he breaks up with me?
292
00:10:39,267 --> 00:10:41,900
You don't do that
to somebody, no.
293
00:10:41,933 --> 00:10:44,267
That's so awful.
294
00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:47,933
I mean, he really loved me.
295
00:10:47,967 --> 00:10:49,700
Yeah.
296
00:10:49,733 --> 00:10:51,800
Did he say anything to you?
297
00:10:51,833 --> 00:10:54,467
I know how much he likes you,
I just thought maybe...
298
00:10:54,500 --> 00:10:57,033
No, we just, uh, you know,
299
00:10:57,067 --> 00:11:00,733
he talked about aunt Louise
and, the mini bar.
300
00:11:00,767 --> 00:11:03,167
The mini bar?
301
00:11:04,467 --> 00:11:06,633
Oh, gosh, oh, gosh.
302
00:11:06,667 --> 00:11:08,600
This is ridiculous.
303
00:11:08,633 --> 00:11:10,200
Where are you going?
304
00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:12,833
I've got to get a birthday
present for Jeff's mother.
305
00:11:12,867 --> 00:11:14,833
I'm sorry, I forgot,
today's her birthday.
306
00:11:14,867 --> 00:11:18,067
I'll be right back, I'm sorry.
307
00:11:18,100 --> 00:11:20,467
Oh, god, alright, I'm gonna
be back in 20 minutes.
308
00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:22,900
Everybody, everybody
stay here, okay?
309
00:11:22,933 --> 00:11:25,800
Gladys, you're here,
okay, Barbara?
310
00:11:25,833 --> 00:11:27,600
George, right here.
311
00:11:27,633 --> 00:11:29,633
Gladys, I'll be right back.
312
00:11:29,667 --> 00:11:32,066
I'm just gonna
get a birthday present.
313
00:11:32,067 --> 00:11:35,567
Half an hour at...
40 minutes at the most.
314
00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:37,233
45 minutes.
315
00:11:37,267 --> 00:11:38,633
( Sobbing )
316
00:11:42,800 --> 00:11:46,133
Um, I'd like to buy
a pair of sunglasses.
317
00:11:46,167 --> 00:11:47,400
It's a birthday present.
318
00:11:47,433 --> 00:11:48,433
Okay.
319
00:11:48,467 --> 00:11:50,066
For my friend's mother.
320
00:11:50,067 --> 00:11:51,076
Oh, this one I like a lot.
321
00:11:51,100 --> 00:11:52,133
These are great.
322
00:11:52,167 --> 00:11:54,066
Elizabeth Taylor
wears these glasses.
323
00:11:54,067 --> 00:11:56,767
The exact same glasses.
You're kidding!
324
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,876
Let me see that
mirror over there.
325
00:11:57,900 --> 00:11:59,066
They're very in vogue right now.
326
00:11:59,067 --> 00:12:01,300
They are? Yeah, absolutely.
327
00:12:01,333 --> 00:12:03,300
You see why? Oh, yeah.
328
00:12:03,333 --> 00:12:04,367
I like that.
329
00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:05,467
I think they're perfect.
330
00:12:05,500 --> 00:12:06,467
Beautiful.
331
00:12:06,500 --> 00:12:07,467
Alright.
332
00:12:07,500 --> 00:12:08,467
Really?
333
00:12:08,500 --> 00:12:09,467
Yeah, sure, come on.
334
00:12:09,500 --> 00:12:10,467
Alright, let me get you a case.
335
00:12:10,500 --> 00:12:11,800
I don't fool around.
336
00:12:11,833 --> 00:12:13,643
Give you a case, I'll throw
in some lens cleaner.
337
00:12:13,667 --> 00:12:14,909
How would you like
to pay for these?
338
00:12:14,933 --> 00:12:16,133
Okay. Credit card.
339
00:12:16,167 --> 00:12:18,967
Um, can you gift wrap these?
340
00:12:19,067 --> 00:12:20,400
No, I'm sorry, we don't wrap.
341
00:12:20,433 --> 00:12:25,933
Well, how would one go about
getting this gift wrapped?
342
00:12:25,967 --> 00:12:28,167
Get some wrapping paper
and wrap it.
343
00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:30,467
Okay, where would I
get the paper?
344
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,267
You know, there's
a card store upstairs.
345
00:12:32,300 --> 00:12:33,667
You could maybe go there.
346
00:12:33,700 --> 00:12:36,833
And what about, would they have,
you need a scissor, too, right?
347
00:12:36,867 --> 00:12:38,633
A scissor.
348
00:12:38,667 --> 00:12:40,476
You need a scissor to cut the
paper, right? And also...
349
00:12:40,500 --> 00:12:41,533
To cut the paper, yeah.
350
00:12:41,567 --> 00:12:43,100
And scotch tape, too, right?
351
00:12:43,133 --> 00:12:44,133
Right.
352
00:12:44,167 --> 00:12:46,533
Do they sell all that
in the same store?
353
00:12:46,567 --> 00:12:48,633
No, I don't believe they do.
354
00:12:48,667 --> 00:12:50,833
You could check.
355
00:12:50,867 --> 00:12:52,433
And you might want to...
356
00:12:52,467 --> 00:12:55,067
If you're gonna go get that
stuff, you might wanna get a bow.
357
00:12:55,100 --> 00:12:56,233
And a card.
358
00:12:56,267 --> 00:12:59,367
A bow and a card?
359
00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:02,133
Well, yeah, so she knows
who the gift is from.
360
00:13:02,167 --> 00:13:03,376
I'm gonna be
handing her the gift.
361
00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:04,609
Isn't it obvious who it's from?
362
00:13:04,633 --> 00:13:06,176
You don't have to have a card,
I'm just saying.
363
00:13:06,200 --> 00:13:10,500
What a process this is,
a bow and a card...
364
00:13:10,533 --> 00:13:11,943
Where do you get
the bow and the card?
365
00:13:11,967 --> 00:13:14,733
Is that in the same store as the
scissor and the scotch tape?
366
00:13:14,767 --> 00:13:15,800
No, the card...
367
00:13:15,833 --> 00:13:17,513
How many stores
are we talking about here?
368
00:13:19,500 --> 00:13:21,367
I really don't know.
369
00:13:23,833 --> 00:13:26,600
Boy, this is very complicated.
370
00:13:31,933 --> 00:13:34,333
( Loud chattering )
371
00:13:38,067 --> 00:13:39,900
( Chattering stops )
372
00:13:42,667 --> 00:13:43,667
What?
373
00:13:47,100 --> 00:13:48,267
What, what?
374
00:13:48,300 --> 00:13:50,567
What?! We got a
paper, that's what.
375
00:13:52,167 --> 00:13:54,667
"Devoted sister, beloved cunt"?!
376
00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:56,600
Huh?
377
00:13:56,633 --> 00:13:58,333
That's what you put
in the paper?
378
00:13:58,367 --> 00:14:00,066
This is a typo.
379
00:14:00,067 --> 00:14:01,933
That's aunt, it should be aunt!
380
00:14:01,967 --> 00:14:03,543
Did Jeff look at this
before he turned it in?
381
00:14:03,567 --> 00:14:05,066
No, they have proofreaders
at these papers!
382
00:14:05,067 --> 00:14:07,400
The woman leads a decent life
and this is how she ends up?
383
00:14:07,433 --> 00:14:08,900
"Beloved cunt"?!
384
00:14:08,933 --> 00:14:10,067
Oh!
385
00:14:10,100 --> 00:14:11,367
My wife is upset!
386
00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:13,533
I'm just glad you weren't
in charge of the headstone!
387
00:14:13,567 --> 00:14:16,867
I meant beloved aunt,
not beloved cunt!
388
00:14:16,900 --> 00:14:17,933
Larry.
389
00:14:17,967 --> 00:14:18,967
Don't keep saying it!
390
00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:20,067
Please.
391
00:14:20,068 --> 00:14:22,500
I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry.
392
00:14:22,533 --> 00:14:24,333
( Muffled yelling )
393
00:14:24,367 --> 00:14:25,700
It's a typo.
394
00:14:25,733 --> 00:14:28,700
Don't you see? It's a typo!
395
00:14:28,733 --> 00:14:32,133
It's a typo, it's aunt!
396
00:14:32,167 --> 00:14:34,467
Cheryl!
397
00:14:34,500 --> 00:14:36,133
Larry...
398
00:14:36,167 --> 00:14:38,800
Hey, Larry, excuse me
for a second, Cheryl.
399
00:14:38,833 --> 00:14:41,233
I just got off the phone
with Craig and I, uh,
400
00:14:41,267 --> 00:14:43,667
wanted to run this by you,
see if it rings any bells.
401
00:14:43,700 --> 00:14:45,933
"It wasn't her mother who died,
it was just her aunt.
402
00:14:45,967 --> 00:14:47,567
"You should break up
with her today.
403
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:49,833
You don't look happy,
you should break up!"
404
00:14:49,867 --> 00:14:51,233
What?
405
00:14:51,267 --> 00:14:52,600
Yeah, that's what he said!
406
00:14:52,633 --> 00:14:55,533
Oh, my god, did you tell Craig
to break up with Becky?
407
00:14:55,567 --> 00:14:57,100
He talked to me at the funeral,
408
00:14:57,133 --> 00:14:59,309
but I told him to wait 'til
he got back to Tallahassee!
409
00:14:59,333 --> 00:15:01,400
I didn't say to do it
last night at the wake!
410
00:15:01,433 --> 00:15:02,867
Oh, well, never mind!
411
00:15:02,900 --> 00:15:04,833
What is the matter with you?!
412
00:15:04,867 --> 00:15:07,267
He's a bad guy,
I was doing you a favor!
413
00:15:07,300 --> 00:15:09,700
Okay, Larry, I think
you should just leave!
414
00:15:11,900 --> 00:15:13,867
You mean for tonight?
415
00:15:13,900 --> 00:15:16,267
At least, please.
416
00:15:18,067 --> 00:15:19,500
I am sorry.
417
00:15:19,533 --> 00:15:21,167
Cheryl,
418
00:15:21,200 --> 00:15:23,900
you know how I can
get this gift wrapped?
419
00:15:47,867 --> 00:15:50,833
Hey, let me ask you something.
420
00:15:50,867 --> 00:15:54,733
How would one go about
getting this gift wrapped?
421
00:15:54,767 --> 00:15:58,433
Um, well, uh, if you, uh,
422
00:15:58,467 --> 00:15:59,533
do you have the paper?
423
00:15:59,567 --> 00:16:01,200
No, I don't have anything.
424
00:16:01,233 --> 00:16:03,867
You could probably go to
a stationary store.
425
00:16:03,900 --> 00:16:05,940
Yeah, stationary store
for the scissor and the tape,
426
00:16:05,967 --> 00:16:08,066
but you gotta go
someplace else for the paper.
427
00:16:08,067 --> 00:16:09,776
Yeah, depending on
what kind of paper you want.
428
00:16:09,800 --> 00:16:11,433
I don't give a shit,
any kind of paper.
429
00:16:11,467 --> 00:16:14,933
Well then you should probably
go to, like, a party store,
430
00:16:14,967 --> 00:16:16,066
where you can get
gift wrapping paper,
431
00:16:16,067 --> 00:16:17,200
at, like, a party store.
432
00:16:17,233 --> 00:16:19,333
But they don't have
the tape and scissor.
433
00:16:19,367 --> 00:16:20,433
I don't know, they might,
434
00:16:20,467 --> 00:16:23,667
I wouldn't bet on it,
I would bring my own.
435
00:16:23,700 --> 00:16:24,809
Well, let me ask you a question.
436
00:16:24,833 --> 00:16:27,400
If I brought
the scissor and the tape
437
00:16:27,433 --> 00:16:29,633
to this party store
that you're talking about...
438
00:16:29,667 --> 00:16:30,676
Right, they have
the paper there.
439
00:16:30,700 --> 00:16:32,233
Would they wrap it for me?
440
00:16:32,267 --> 00:16:34,267
They might,
honesty, I don't know
441
00:16:34,300 --> 00:16:35,900
because my wife
wraps everything.
442
00:16:35,933 --> 00:16:38,700
But if you bring it with you,
if you have it there,
443
00:16:38,733 --> 00:16:40,066
maybe they... I don't know,
444
00:16:40,067 --> 00:16:42,900
if you just
tip them or something.
445
00:16:42,933 --> 00:16:44,767
Hey, let me ask you something.
446
00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:47,500
How would you go about getting
something like this gift wrapped?
447
00:16:47,533 --> 00:16:49,467
Just go to a hallmark
or something.
448
00:16:49,500 --> 00:16:50,733
Yeah, stationary store.
449
00:16:50,767 --> 00:16:52,200
That's for the paper, right?
450
00:16:52,233 --> 00:16:53,509
But they don't have
the scissors and the tape.
451
00:16:53,533 --> 00:16:54,500
Yeah, they will.
452
00:16:54,533 --> 00:16:55,633
They got scissors and tape?
453
00:16:55,667 --> 00:16:57,333
Yeah. Really?
454
00:16:57,367 --> 00:16:59,800
Ribbon and bows and cards.
455
00:16:59,833 --> 00:17:00,876
Yeah, they have
everything there.
456
00:17:00,900 --> 00:17:02,667
So, hallmark has
that whole thing there?
457
00:17:02,700 --> 00:17:04,133
Where's the hallmark?
458
00:17:04,167 --> 00:17:06,067
I don't know.
459
00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:09,200
( Male ) you gotta fix
this pump over here.
460
00:17:09,233 --> 00:17:12,133
Alright, forget it,
I'm all done here.
461
00:17:12,167 --> 00:17:15,067
You don't know
where the hallmark is.
462
00:17:20,633 --> 00:17:23,433
So, mom, I thought maybe
tomorrow if you're up to it,
463
00:17:23,467 --> 00:17:25,066
we'd go to the outlet center.
464
00:17:25,067 --> 00:17:26,267
Alright.
465
00:17:26,300 --> 00:17:28,333
Hi! Look who's here.
466
00:17:28,367 --> 00:17:29,733
Hello.
467
00:17:29,767 --> 00:17:30,767
Larry, hi.
468
00:17:30,800 --> 00:17:31,767
Hi.
469
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:32,767
Be nice.
470
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:33,767
Hi.
471
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:34,800
Hi.
472
00:17:34,833 --> 00:17:35,833
Happy birthday.
473
00:17:35,867 --> 00:17:37,300
( Jeff ) hey!
474
00:17:37,333 --> 00:17:40,133
( Wife ) that was sweet of you.
475
00:17:40,167 --> 00:17:42,967
What kind of present is that?
Not wrapped nicely.
476
00:17:43,067 --> 00:17:45,967
Yeah, I'm sorry about that.
477
00:17:46,067 --> 00:17:48,700
I looked in stores, I couldn't
find any wrapping store.
478
00:17:48,733 --> 00:17:51,100
You know, there's no
wrapping stores anywhere?
479
00:17:51,133 --> 00:17:53,600
Oh, my gosh!
480
00:17:53,633 --> 00:17:56,300
Sunglasses!
481
00:17:56,333 --> 00:17:57,443
( Jeff ) wow, look at those.
482
00:17:57,467 --> 00:17:59,500
Oh, my gosh, look at this!
483
00:17:59,533 --> 00:18:02,767
You know what?
Elizabeth Taylor wears glasses,
484
00:18:02,800 --> 00:18:05,267
exact, she has
the exact same glasses!
485
00:18:05,300 --> 00:18:06,300
You hear that?
486
00:18:06,333 --> 00:18:07,967
I can't use 'em.
487
00:18:08,067 --> 00:18:10,567
I, I have a prescription
in my lenses.
488
00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:12,233
I'm sorry.
489
00:18:12,267 --> 00:18:14,400
Alright, no, no, I'll get...
490
00:18:14,433 --> 00:18:16,066
I'll take care of it.
491
00:18:16,067 --> 00:18:17,433
I want to do it,
I want to do it.
492
00:18:17,467 --> 00:18:18,933
I'll get lenses put in.
493
00:18:18,967 --> 00:18:20,109
You'll give me your prescription
494
00:18:20,133 --> 00:18:21,643
and we'll make them
prescription glasses.
495
00:18:21,667 --> 00:18:23,600
( Jeff ) isn't that nice?
496
00:18:23,633 --> 00:18:25,400
Oh, how did the obit go?
497
00:18:25,433 --> 00:18:27,066
You got a paper?
498
00:18:27,067 --> 00:18:28,467
Yeah, it's over there.
499
00:18:28,500 --> 00:18:30,100
Obituaries...
500
00:18:30,133 --> 00:18:31,667
It's in the back there.
501
00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:33,800
Here, I'll show you how it went.
502
00:18:33,833 --> 00:18:35,467
Here, here's how it went.
503
00:18:35,500 --> 00:18:38,633
"Louise hoenin,
devoted sister, beloved cunt"?
504
00:18:38,667 --> 00:18:39,700
( Wife ) what?!
505
00:18:39,733 --> 00:18:41,200
Jeffrey, it says that
in the paper?
506
00:18:41,233 --> 00:18:42,233
Let me see this.
507
00:18:42,267 --> 00:18:43,267
That's unbelievable!
508
00:18:43,300 --> 00:18:44,333
I know!
509
00:18:44,367 --> 00:18:45,433
That's unbelievable!
510
00:18:45,467 --> 00:18:47,933
You said aunt,
I wrote down aunt!
511
00:18:47,967 --> 00:18:49,066
That's bullshit!
512
00:18:49,067 --> 00:18:50,433
Don't they
proofread these things?
513
00:18:50,467 --> 00:18:51,733
I am so sorry.
514
00:18:51,767 --> 00:18:53,300
Oh, god, Larry.
515
00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:55,567
Yeah, I need a letter of apology
from your friend...
516
00:18:55,600 --> 00:18:56,633
Retraction, retraction.
517
00:18:56,667 --> 00:18:58,067
What are they gonna say?
518
00:18:58,100 --> 00:19:01,667
"We're sorry we called her
a cunt, we meant aunt"?
519
00:19:01,700 --> 00:19:03,709
Point well taken, I'll have
them write a letter of apology.
520
00:19:03,733 --> 00:19:04,767
And you, too.
521
00:19:04,800 --> 00:19:06,066
I'll write one, too, I promise.
522
00:19:06,067 --> 00:19:07,400
Yeah, still, to print this.
523
00:19:07,433 --> 00:19:08,933
Cheryl must be so upset.
524
00:19:08,967 --> 00:19:10,967
She kicked me out of the house.
525
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:12,067
She kicked you out?
526
00:19:12,100 --> 00:19:14,767
Her relatives are there,
her parents, friends,
527
00:19:14,800 --> 00:19:16,367
they came after me
like a pack of...
528
00:19:16,400 --> 00:19:17,676
I thought they were
gonna kill me.
529
00:19:17,700 --> 00:19:18,843
You know what? You'll stay here.
530
00:19:18,867 --> 00:19:20,633
I can't stay here,
I have nothing to wear.
531
00:19:20,667 --> 00:19:22,307
I've got plenty of stuff
for you to wear!
532
00:19:22,333 --> 00:19:24,400
No, Larry, you'll stay here.
533
00:19:24,433 --> 00:19:25,809
You know, mom and dad
are here anyway.
534
00:19:25,833 --> 00:19:27,867
It's no big deal,
I'm making a great dinner.
535
00:19:27,900 --> 00:19:29,633
You'll stay here tonight,
I'm so sorry.
536
00:19:29,667 --> 00:19:31,609
I think you should call Cheryl
and personally apologize.
537
00:19:31,633 --> 00:19:32,667
I will, I will.
538
00:19:32,700 --> 00:19:33,867
Do me a favor.
539
00:19:33,900 --> 00:19:37,133
When I die, let someone else
handle the obit, okay?
540
00:19:37,167 --> 00:19:38,533
Hey, how much longer
'til dinner?
541
00:19:38,567 --> 00:19:41,067
Oh, 25 minutes, 30, tops.
542
00:19:41,100 --> 00:19:42,900
Dad, let's go
finish the movie, come on.
543
00:19:42,933 --> 00:19:43,967
What movie?
544
00:19:44,067 --> 00:19:47,066
Larry, let me see
those glasses again.
545
00:19:47,067 --> 00:19:48,533
Those sunglasses.
546
00:19:48,567 --> 00:19:50,167
Okay, sure.
547
00:19:50,200 --> 00:19:52,633
I can't see through them,
but I can get an idea.
548
00:19:52,667 --> 00:19:53,667
They're beauties.
549
00:19:53,700 --> 00:19:55,600
I'm telling you,
Elizabeth Taylor.
550
00:19:55,633 --> 00:19:56,700
Oh, wait, wait a minute.
551
00:19:56,733 --> 00:19:59,233
I think I can
see my reflection in here.
552
00:19:59,267 --> 00:20:02,267
Oh, wait, hold it,
I'll help you out here.
553
00:20:03,233 --> 00:20:04,467
Good.
554
00:20:04,500 --> 00:20:06,767
Uh-huh.
555
00:20:10,033 --> 00:20:11,500
Hmm.
556
00:20:18,967 --> 00:20:22,000
Um, alright, so I'll get
the prescription for this thing.
557
00:20:22,033 --> 00:20:23,667
We'll get that taken care of.
558
00:20:23,700 --> 00:20:25,833
It shouldn't take
too long, you know?
559
00:20:25,867 --> 00:20:27,767
They look good, though.
560
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:32,600
See, mom, I told you he's got
a very, very sweet side.
561
00:20:32,633 --> 00:20:34,233
( Snickering ) very.
562
00:20:50,633 --> 00:20:51,700
( Knocking )
563
00:20:51,733 --> 00:20:53,067
Yeah?
564
00:20:53,100 --> 00:20:54,600
You gotta go.
565
00:20:54,633 --> 00:20:55,833
What?
566
00:20:55,867 --> 00:20:56,867
You gotta go.
567
00:20:56,900 --> 00:20:58,076
What the hell
are you talking about?
568
00:20:58,100 --> 00:21:00,700
You copped a feel off my mom,
you gotta go.
569
00:21:00,733 --> 00:21:04,267
I copped a feel off your mom,
what are you saying to me?!
570
00:21:04,300 --> 00:21:05,443
She's walking around,
moping around,
571
00:21:05,467 --> 00:21:06,476
I'm saying, what's the matter?
572
00:21:06,500 --> 00:21:07,867
She said,
"Larry touched my bosom
573
00:21:07,900 --> 00:21:09,309
and held it there
for several seconds."
574
00:21:09,333 --> 00:21:11,700
Schmuck! Would you listen
to me for a second?
575
00:21:11,733 --> 00:21:12,733
What?
576
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:15,900
We're in the kitchen.
577
00:21:15,933 --> 00:21:17,776
She wanted to try on
the sunglasses again, okay?
578
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:19,633
And she was looking
in the toaster
579
00:21:19,667 --> 00:21:22,067
and I picked up the toaster
and I was holding the toaster,
580
00:21:22,100 --> 00:21:24,600
and she wanted to get a better
look at her face in the toaster
581
00:21:24,633 --> 00:21:27,233
and she leaned against
the back of my hand,
582
00:21:27,267 --> 00:21:28,767
and so, I didn't
want to just turn...
583
00:21:28,800 --> 00:21:32,933
I didn't want to hurt her feelings
by just taking it away fast.
584
00:21:32,967 --> 00:21:34,700
I'm sorry.
585
00:21:34,733 --> 00:21:36,667
She's all freaked out.
586
00:21:36,700 --> 00:21:38,733
You gotta go.
587
00:21:38,767 --> 00:21:41,233
You're kicking me out?
Is that what you're doing?
588
00:21:41,267 --> 00:21:44,333
Alright, look, look,
look, look, look, look, look...
589
00:21:44,367 --> 00:21:46,567
Set the alarm, do you know
how to set the alarm?
590
00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:48,133
Seven A.M.
591
00:21:48,167 --> 00:21:50,167
She rubbed up against
the back of my hand!
592
00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:51,900
I believe you,
it's not about that!
593
00:21:51,933 --> 00:21:53,076
You think I go around
feeling up old ladies?!
594
00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:55,067
I apologized,
it's not about that!
595
00:21:55,100 --> 00:21:57,400
Shh, it's not about that.
596
00:21:57,433 --> 00:21:58,700
But listen to me.
597
00:21:58,733 --> 00:21:59,876
You gotta get out of here
at seven in the morning.
598
00:21:59,900 --> 00:22:01,709
Alright, I'll be out of here
early in the morning.
599
00:22:01,733 --> 00:22:04,233
There's bagels in the kitchen,
grab one and get out.
600
00:22:04,267 --> 00:22:06,176
I won't grab anything,
I'll just walk out the door.
601
00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:08,066
Your mother thinks
I touched her breast?
602
00:22:08,067 --> 00:22:09,567
That is so sick.
603
00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:11,600
It's what she thinks,
what do you want me to say?
604
00:22:11,633 --> 00:22:12,667
Sweet dreams.
605
00:22:13,800 --> 00:22:15,733
Sweet dreams.
606
00:22:15,767 --> 00:22:18,100
I'll dream about fucking
your mother, sweet dreams.
607
00:22:41,067 --> 00:22:42,100
You!
608
00:22:42,133 --> 00:22:43,100
Shh, quiet.
609
00:22:43,133 --> 00:22:44,133
How dare you.
610
00:22:44,167 --> 00:22:45,167
I didn't do anything.
611
00:22:45,200 --> 00:22:46,367
Let me explain what happened.
612
00:22:46,400 --> 00:22:48,043
What, you think I enjoy
that kind of thing?
613
00:22:48,067 --> 00:22:50,700
No, of course not, don't be
ridiculous, I didn't do anything.
614
00:22:50,733 --> 00:22:52,733
( Jeff ) this has gotta stop.
615
00:22:52,767 --> 00:22:54,800
Will you please tell her
I didn't do anything?
616
00:22:54,833 --> 00:22:57,066
Ma, ma, he didn't do anything.
617
00:22:57,067 --> 00:22:59,833
It was the toaster and the hand.
618
00:22:59,867 --> 00:23:01,733
You rubbed against me.
619
00:23:01,767 --> 00:23:03,267
Shh, you're gonna wake up Sammy.
620
00:23:03,300 --> 00:23:04,300
Shh!
621
00:23:04,333 --> 00:23:07,167
Did you see what he did?
622
00:23:07,200 --> 00:23:08,643
I explained to her
it was an accident.
623
00:23:08,667 --> 00:23:09,667
It was an accident.
624
00:23:09,700 --> 00:23:10,833
Oh, how convenient.
625
00:23:10,867 --> 00:23:13,700
It was an accident,
you rubbed up against me.
626
00:23:15,767 --> 00:23:19,700
What kind of
human being are you?
627
00:23:19,733 --> 00:23:22,167
Yes, you pushed up
against my hand!
628
00:23:22,200 --> 00:23:24,300
I didn't do anything!
629
00:23:24,333 --> 00:23:25,800
It was an accident.
630
00:23:25,833 --> 00:23:27,133
You gotta go, you have to go.
631
00:23:27,167 --> 00:23:28,300
I think it's better, Larry.
632
00:23:28,333 --> 00:23:29,767
Okay, ma? He's gonna leave.
633
00:23:29,800 --> 00:23:30,800
Go back to sleep.
634
00:23:30,833 --> 00:23:32,200
Sick person.
635
00:23:32,233 --> 00:23:34,633
( Jeff ) enough of the "sick
person", he's not a sick person.
636
00:23:42,533 --> 00:23:43,533
Hey.
637
00:23:45,267 --> 00:23:47,600
I'm really sorry.
638
00:23:47,633 --> 00:23:50,833
This is horrible, I'm so sorry.
639
00:23:50,867 --> 00:23:52,066
Please accept my apology.
640
00:23:52,067 --> 00:23:53,767
Well, I mean, you know,
it's not you.
641
00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:55,233
I'll straighten it out tomorrow.
642
00:23:55,267 --> 00:23:58,066
You know, they get
a little crazy, my parents.
643
00:23:58,067 --> 00:23:59,067
I'm sorry.
644
00:23:59,068 --> 00:24:00,633
It's an awful thing.
645
00:24:00,667 --> 00:24:02,333
I mean, even when I was dating,
646
00:24:02,367 --> 00:24:04,066
I would wait four months
647
00:24:04,067 --> 00:24:07,167
before I would try and make
a breast move, you know?
648
00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:08,200
I understand.
649
00:24:08,233 --> 00:24:09,633
And it wouldn't be
in their kitchen
650
00:24:09,667 --> 00:24:12,300
in front of their
daughter-in-law and their son...
651
00:24:12,333 --> 00:24:13,533
I know, it's horrible.
652
00:24:13,567 --> 00:24:16,066
I'll take of it all tomorrow,
I'll smooth it all over.
653
00:24:16,067 --> 00:24:17,467
Do me a favor.
654
00:24:17,500 --> 00:24:19,300
Let me take care
of the sunglasses.
655
00:24:19,333 --> 00:24:20,433
The sunglasses?
656
00:24:20,467 --> 00:24:22,500
Yeah, give them to me,
let me take care of them.
657
00:24:22,533 --> 00:24:24,233
You want me to
give her a gift now?
658
00:24:24,267 --> 00:24:25,233
You gave it to her.
659
00:24:25,267 --> 00:24:26,600
After this entertaining evening?
660
00:24:26,633 --> 00:24:27,667
You gave it to her.
661
00:24:27,700 --> 00:24:28,700
No, I don't think so.
662
00:24:28,733 --> 00:24:30,367
No, no, no, no.
663
00:24:30,400 --> 00:24:32,433
That's called "Indian giving".
664
00:24:32,467 --> 00:24:33,733
Yes, I know what it's called.
665
00:24:33,767 --> 00:24:36,233
It's a very racist term,
but I'm okay with that.
666
00:24:36,267 --> 00:24:37,343
What are you gonna do with them?
667
00:24:37,367 --> 00:24:39,267
What could you
possibly do with them?
668
00:24:39,300 --> 00:24:42,633
I'll give them to
somebody who likes me.
669
00:24:42,667 --> 00:24:44,066
Where are you going now?
670
00:24:44,067 --> 00:24:46,100
I don't know, I can't go home.
671
00:24:46,133 --> 00:24:48,600
Guess I'll go to a hotel.
672
00:24:57,067 --> 00:24:59,767
Hollywood Roosevelt hotel,
how can I help you?
673
00:24:59,800 --> 00:25:02,900
I'll see you this evening,
thank you.
674
00:25:02,933 --> 00:25:04,476
Welcome to the Roosevelt,
how can I help you?
675
00:25:04,500 --> 00:25:05,967
I'd like a room, please.
676
00:25:06,067 --> 00:25:09,100
I'm very sorry, we're completely
filled to capacity this evening.
677
00:25:10,067 --> 00:25:12,066
Okay.
678
00:25:12,067 --> 00:25:16,066
There's a guy in this hotel,
his name's Craig Butler.
679
00:25:16,067 --> 00:25:17,133
Mm-hmm.
680
00:25:17,167 --> 00:25:18,433
Okay, I'm paying for his room.
681
00:25:18,467 --> 00:25:19,776
I don't want to
pay for it anymore.
682
00:25:19,800 --> 00:25:23,067
Wake him up, get him
out, that's my room.
683
00:25:24,367 --> 00:25:28,433
Okay, um, this room is
paid for through tomorrow.
684
00:25:28,467 --> 00:25:29,843
The cards have already been
run for this evening,
685
00:25:29,867 --> 00:25:31,500
so he's authorized
to be in the room
686
00:25:31,533 --> 00:25:33,509
'til eleven a, m, tomorrow
morning, check out time.
687
00:25:33,533 --> 00:25:35,576
Our manager will be happy
to work out the bill with you,
688
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:37,467
if you come back tomorrow,
he comes on at ten.
689
00:25:37,500 --> 00:25:39,509
You don't have a room for me
in this hotel tonight?
690
00:25:39,533 --> 00:25:40,733
Not one room?
691
00:25:40,767 --> 00:25:42,700
Don't you always keep
extra rooms for people?
692
00:25:42,733 --> 00:25:43,800
Not one room.
693
00:25:43,833 --> 00:25:45,276
You're not the first person
we've turned away.
694
00:25:45,300 --> 00:25:48,367
I'm frank Sinatra, Jr.,
you're turning me away tonight,
695
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:50,066
Jr. walks in here
and you're turning him away?
696
00:25:50,067 --> 00:25:51,367
Yes, sir, unfortunately.
697
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:53,767
The pope, the pope is being
just shooed out into the street.
698
00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:56,400
You're shooing the pope out,
is that what you're gonna do?
699
00:25:56,433 --> 00:25:57,433
Yes, sir.
700
00:25:57,467 --> 00:25:59,133
We are filled to capacity, sir.
701
00:26:02,267 --> 00:26:04,066
A pair of sunglasses?
702
00:26:04,067 --> 00:26:05,067
Excuse me?
703
00:26:05,100 --> 00:26:07,467
A pair of sunglasses, here.
704
00:26:07,500 --> 00:26:08,700
You want to give...
705
00:26:08,733 --> 00:26:09,733
Yeah.
706
00:26:09,767 --> 00:26:10,933
Elizabeth Taylor sunglasses.
707
00:26:10,967 --> 00:26:12,067
They're very nice, sir...
708
00:26:12,100 --> 00:26:13,800
Elizabeth Taylor
wears these sunglasses.
709
00:26:13,833 --> 00:26:17,633
Thank you, sir,
I wear prescription.
710
00:26:17,667 --> 00:26:19,433
Thank you very much.
711
00:26:19,467 --> 00:26:21,233
You ever watch
the Seinfeld show?
712
00:26:21,267 --> 00:26:22,633
Yes, sir.
713
00:26:25,400 --> 00:26:27,067
Just curious.
714
00:26:28,700 --> 00:26:30,733
( Girl laughing )
715
00:26:31,300 --> 00:26:32,333
Hey, Larry!
716
00:26:32,367 --> 00:26:33,667
Oh, hey, Larry, hi!
717
00:26:33,700 --> 00:26:34,733
Hi, buddy.
718
00:26:34,767 --> 00:26:36,833
This is Larry?
719
00:26:36,867 --> 00:26:38,500
Thanks for
ratting me out to Becky,
720
00:26:38,533 --> 00:26:39,767
really appreciated it.
721
00:26:39,800 --> 00:26:40,933
I did not rat you out.
722
00:26:40,967 --> 00:26:43,333
You told her everything
we talked about.
723
00:26:43,367 --> 00:26:45,067
And I told you
not to say anything.
724
00:26:45,100 --> 00:26:46,367
Well, that's your problem.
725
00:26:46,400 --> 00:26:47,467
What a jerk.
726
00:26:47,500 --> 00:26:48,767
Oh, I'm a jerk?
727
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:49,967
Is that right?
728
00:26:50,067 --> 00:26:52,400
Oh, what are you gonna do,
beat me up?
729
00:26:52,433 --> 00:26:54,267
Maybe I will.
730
00:26:54,300 --> 00:26:55,833
Go ahead, take a shot.
731
00:26:55,867 --> 00:26:56,933
You Hollywood people.
732
00:26:56,967 --> 00:26:58,066
Guys, guys, guys, gentlemen,
733
00:26:58,067 --> 00:26:59,567
I cannot have the two of you
734
00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:01,933
standing in the lobby of the
hotel yelling at each other.
735
00:27:01,967 --> 00:27:02,967
Right, I am sorry, sir.
736
00:27:03,067 --> 00:27:04,133
Excuse me,
737
00:27:04,167 --> 00:27:05,243
are you guests
at the hotel this evening?
738
00:27:05,267 --> 00:27:06,367
Yes, I am.
739
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:07,933
Can I see your room key, please?
740
00:27:07,967 --> 00:27:09,066
Yes, sure.
741
00:27:09,067 --> 00:27:10,067
I'm paying for that.
742
00:27:10,068 --> 00:27:12,066
Excuse me, one at a time.
743
00:27:12,067 --> 00:27:15,200
I think it would be best if you
go back to your room now.
744
00:27:15,233 --> 00:27:17,500
Very good, thank you,
thank you very much.
745
00:27:17,533 --> 00:27:20,167
He's here because
I'm paying for him.
746
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:23,500
Sir, do you have a room key
here at the Roosevelt?
747
00:27:24,767 --> 00:27:26,100
No.
748
00:27:26,133 --> 00:27:28,200
Then I need to ask you to leave.
749
00:27:30,700 --> 00:27:32,133
Sir.
750
00:27:38,733 --> 00:27:41,100
Can I interest you
in some sunglasses?
751
00:27:41,133 --> 00:27:43,600
No, just leave, please.
752
00:28:30,533 --> 00:28:34,567
Captions copyright 2000
home box office
753
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:39,733
a division of time Warner
entertainment company, l.P.
754
00:28:39,767 --> 00:28:43,800
Captioned by
hbo communications center
52178
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