All language subtitles for breed5

‐ So what number
are you on now?

‐ Seven.

‐ Wow. That's good.

Seven's good;
you said going to a party

would put you on a nine
for anxiety.

‐ It's quite a strong seven.
‐

Well, it's still good.

Have you done your breathing?
‐ Yeah.

Brilliant.

Well, you've only got to stay
for about half an hour

if you want.

‐ Okay. Thanks, Dad.

Mum!

‐ Just getting ready.

Can you help me
with my history homework?

‐ Well, unless
it's about the history

of Brookside characters
from 1992 to 1997,

I'm afraid I've got
nothing for you, sweetie.

‐ It's about the Falklands War.

‐ Ah, I said
that I was getting ready,

so can you please just give me
a fucking moment?

‐ Go get my phone
from my bag, Ava.

An ex‐boyfriend of mine
was part of the task force.

Catering, below deck,

but he would've heard
the majority of it.

‐ Thanks, Granny.

‐ You really need to tell Paul.

Paul?

Paul.
‐ Come here, mate.

Oi, behave yourself, or there's
no ice cream till you're 15.

Actually, that's a bit harsh.

‐ Paul, I need to tell you
something important.

‐ Oh?

‐ I'm pregnant.

‐ Wow.

‐ Why are you pulling
that face?

‐ What face?

This is literally
what my face does.

What face am I
supposed to pull?

‐ Oh, I don't know, happy?
Neutral?

Anything other than that
horrible, sour fucking grimace.

‐ No, it's‐‐it's just a shock,
that's all.

And I thought we'd agreed.

‐ Agr‐‐agreed what?
What did we agree?

‐ That we wouldn't have
another one just yet.

‐ Well, I'm sorry
it's such shit news.

I'll go and have
an abortion, shall I?

What's Vera Drake's number?

‐ I'm sorry. I'm so‐‐
I'm just taking it in.

Luke nearly broke me.

Right, he's still breaking me.

I do love you, mate,
but you know it's true.

‐ I've got a baby in me,

and do you know
what it feels like

to have you act like
that's the worst news ever?

No. Honestly.

‐ Ally.
‐ No.

‐ Hon...

I hope you realize
you're paying for this.

‐ Is this Leo's house, then?

‐ Yeah, that's it.

‐ It's nice.

Bit showy.

So what do his parents do
for a living?

‐ His mum's a teacher,
and his dad's a potter.

‐ A potter?

‐ Mmm, he makes pots. Clay.

Like the ones Mum likes.

You know,
brown and a bit wonky.

He used to be in banking.

‐ Oh, for f‐‐
Right. Say no more.

I'm not jealous.

It's a nice house,
that's all.

A potter. Um...

Right, I'll be at the end
of the phone

if you need me
to come and get you.

‐ I'll try and stay
till the end,

and then Leo's dad
can give me a lift.

‐ Oh, all right, well, I'll
listen out for the helicopter.

What do you reckon, mate?
Give it a go?

Luke,

be yourself.

If you need to,
you can go into the garden

and do your breathing.

‐ Okay. See you later.

‐ Yep.

You poor sod.

‐ Hmm, what pizza
are you having?

‐ Pbbt, Pepperoni Hot, baby.

Same pizza choice since 1989.
What about you?

‐ I'm going bespoke.

Toppings from all over
the place.

Jazz pizza.
More of this, hold that.

They're gonna hate me.

‐ Can I get you guys
anything to drink?

‐ Um, yeah, I'll have
a pint of Peroni.

‐ Just a fizzy water, thanks.

‐ So you're pregnant.

‐ What?

‐ Never been out
for a meal with you

where you haven't had wine

unless you were pregnant
or breastfeeding.

‐ Really?

‐ It has literally
never happened.

I've also picked up
on some other clues‐‐

you being mental, for a start.

‐ Listen, this is our first
date night out in months.

‐ Yeah.
‐ And we've got, what,

three hours before Mum finishes

her third bottle
and then falls asleep

with the deadlock on,
so there is a hard deadline.

‐ Yeah, but
fucking hell, hon...

a baby.

I mean, a‐‐

a baby, that is
a very big deal.

‐ Yeah, no, I know, and I know
we need to get into this,

but before that,
if at all possible,

I would love to order
a really complicated pizza

and then eat the whole thing
very, very quickly

whilst we bitch about people
we pretend to like.

‐ Okay.

‐ Thanks.

‐ Are we ready to order?

‐ Yes, uh,
this could get complicated,

so you might want to get a pen.

‐ And a slide rule.

‐ Right, margherita base,
extra basil.

Right.

‐ Then capers, anchovies,

black olives, smoked garlic,

red peppers, green peppers,
yellow peppers.

I'll just put peppers.
‐ Mushrooms...

‐ Hi, Mum.
Is everything all right?

‐ I wasn't asleep.
‐ Clearly.

How was the restaurant?
‐ It was fine.

‐ Did you tell him
you're pregnant?

‐ Yes, but what if I hadn't?
Fucking hell, Mum.

‐ Right, so suddenly
I'm the bad guy.

‐ Yes, you are.

‐ Hormones.

She doesn't know
what she's saying.

‐ Think she might do.
Headlines.

Luke looked quite grim when
he got back from his party,

and Ava seems a bit off.

‐ Hmm.
How are you doing?

How are you feeling
about the baby?

‐ Not sure.

‐ Between you, me,
and the garden gate,

I have four friends
who had three children.

Two of them didn't see 60.

‐ Terrific.
‐ Just a word to the wise.

Three is the tragic number.

‐
I've just been feeling,

like, weird as balls.

Just, like, really odd.

‐ The whole thing is just daft.

You're definitely sure
you're pregnant?

‐ Yes, I've been collecting
pregnancy tests

like they're fucking Pokémon.

‐ And‐‐and this one,

is it‐‐is it making you feel
the same kind of weird

as Luke and Ava did, or...

‐ I mean, I can't remember.

The whole thing is‐‐is weird,
isn't it?

I mean, growing a human
inside you is nuts.

I do know that Ava made me go

the most mental
when she was born.

Just, like, this tiny vampire

sucking my life out
through my tits.

Ah.

‐ I know. It was tough.

I mean, of course,
I don't have tits,

so I can't
fully appreciate your‐‐

‐ Well...

‐ What's that me‐‐
you think I've got tits?

‐ It just‐‐it happens to men
in their 40s.

Oh. Look at these.

I've suddenly got some tits.

‐ Fuck you.

‐

‐ Mm.

Hello.

Hi, yeah, this is Luke's dad.

Paul.

Oh, hello, Leo's mum.
Everything all right?

No, I'm just
decanting a shiraz.

Yeah, no, Luke seemed fine.
Why?

Oi, bell end.

Leo's mum told me
that you were smoking

in their gazebo.
‐ What's a gazebo?

‐ I don't fucking know, do I?

Were you smoking?

‐ No. Some of the others were.

I went into the garden
'cause I had a bit

of a panic attack
and needed some air.

But I didn't go
in the gazebo thing,

and I didn't smoke.

‐ Really?
‐ Really!

‐ I swear to Christ, mate,
you telling me the truth?

‐ Yes.

‐ All right. Good.

I believe you.

‐ Thank you.

I'm sorry you had
a panic attack.

That must've been rough.

‐ It was. Thanks.

‐ Did I make you
lose your game?

‐ It's all right.
It's not that sort of a game.

‐ All right.

You should turn it off anyway.

Go to sleep, please.

‐ I'm having doubts.

‐ Baby doubts?
‐ Yeah.

I mean, not as in small doubts,

as in doubts about the baby.

I'm‐‐

I'm not sure
if I want this baby.

‐ Okay.

That is a perfectly reasonable
thing to think.

‐ I just, uh‐‐
I just don't know.

‐ Well, if you were
a pendulum, right?

‐ Mm‐hmm.

‐ With "sure" and "not sure"

either side of you,

what angle would you be at
right now?

‐ Um‐‐sorry, where are you
measuring the angle from?

‐ The middle.

‐ And which way
is the pendulum going?

‐ Either way.
That's‐‐that's the point.

You're the pendulum.

‐ Right, so if I say
"30 degrees,"

is that 30 degrees
towards the side

that I'm in favor of
or towards the other side?

‐ No, it's towards the‐‐

you're making this
unnecessarily complicated.

‐ No, you are.

You haven't explained
any of the essential...

‐ Okay. Fine. Shh, shh.

It's all right. It's all right.
‐ Components.

‐ It's fine.
It's not a problem.

It was a bad idea.

Don't worry, it's fine.

‐ 20 degrees.
‐ Right, which way?

‐ I don't know.
‐ Fuck's sake, that's‐‐

‐ That way.

No.
‐ What way was that?

‐ I don't know.

‐ Fuck me ragged.

‐ Hi.

‐ Hi, Mum.

‐ Aw.

You were such a cute
little baby fatso.

We used to call you
Kenny Podgers.

You okay, Ava‐cado?

‐ Yeah.

I've been a bit of a dick
to you lately.

I'm so sorry.

Do you wanna do something fun,
you and me?

‐ Like what?

‐
Wow! A tent bunk.

I'd have loved one of these
at your age.

‐ Bit of a dust trap.

‐ Ah, no, it'd be so cool
in your room.

Right, I'm going up.
You just keep watch.

So graceful.

Ah. Come on up.
It's lovely.

It's like camping,
but it's nice.

Come on.

Hey, if you have a sleepover,

your friend can go underneath,

or they can snuggle up in here.

‐ Sorry.

‐ What, love?

‐ Sorry I hurt you
when I was born.

I heard you and Dad.

‐ When? Oh, my God.

‐ I made you mental
and sucked the life out of you.

‐ No, no, no, no, no, no.
You didn't.

Oh, my sweet thing.

I didn't want you
to hear any of that.

‐ You were really sad
when I was born.

‐ Oh ...d,
I can't stand you thinking

that you ever made me sad,
no.

This bed,
it's got a tent.

‐ Not now!

Ava, look at me.

It wasn't you, ever,

and it was only
for a little while.

Look, most new mums,

they can get a bit wobbly,

but they just‐‐
they just don't admit it.

It doesn't mean that they
don't love their babies.

I loved you.

I love you, okay?

‐ I'm worried
about the new baby.

‐ What? Oh.

Oh, right. Ah, shit.

Listen, we would have told you.

It's just, it's‐‐
it's so early,

but please don't worry.

We're still gonna love
you and Luke just the same.

‐ No, I'm worried
'cause you're an older mum.

So many things could go wrong

with you and the baby.
‐ Oh.

‐ Well, Grace's mum had a baby
when she was 39,

so a lot younger than you.
‐ Right.

‐ And the doctor said
there was an increased risk

high blood pressure,

miscarriage, stillbirth,

even you dying.

It's really dangerous
being a geriatric mum.

‐ Geriatric?

‐ Yeah, that's what
they called Grace's mum.

If you're over 35,
you're geriatric.

‐ Jesus.
This is all a bit mad.

‐ It is a bit mad.
Yes, it‐‐it is,

but I promise I will
look after myself, okay?

No booze, no cigarettes.

I will eat kale and quinoa
and that horrible yogurt

and all that
Gwyneth Paltrow shit,

and I will drink
all of the water, all right?

I love you.

‐ Do you want to use
one of my baby names?

‐ You have names
for your babies?

‐ Yep.
Taylor, Jaguar, Jo, Meg,

Beth, Amy, Saoirse,
Serenity, and Salem.

‐ Aw, baby Jaguar.

‐ Actually,
you can't have that one.

That's my favorite.

‐ Okay. You're my favorite.

But don't tell Luke
or baby Jaguar, all right?

Come on.

Everything's gonna be fine.

I promise.

Cheers, can you stick
a battered sausage

in there too, Nat?

‐ Will do, mate.
‐ Thank you.

‐ Can I get a Fanta?

‐ There's a new lot
in the fridge out the back.

You can pop through
and fetch one, Luke.

‐ Cheers.

‐ What's the damage?

‐ £21.50.
‐ Oh, fuck, is it cash only?

‐ Until the card
what's‐his‐name is fixed, yeah.

Sorry, Paul.
‐ I'm a bit short. Uh...

one second.

Luke's a hoarder.

He'll probably have some
shrapnel in here somewhere.

The fuck?

‐ That's a bit "EastEnders"
drums, innit?

‐ Yeah, just a bit.

‐ What?

‐ It's the fucking lying
that gets me.

‐ I know. I'm sorry.

‐ I believed you!

I was sympathetic.

Your anxiety,
your panic attack.

‐ I really did
have a panic attack.

That's why I've been smoking.
It calms me down.

‐ No, it doesn't;
it just calms the jitters

you get
from nicotine withdrawal.

I know about this stuff.

Fucking hell, it'll kill you.
‐ I know.

‐ Your lungs
are still developing.

‐ Look, I'm sorry.
I'll stop smoking.

I've only had, like,
15 cigarettes in total.

‐ How can you even afford them?
They cost a fortune.

‐ I used the money
Granny Leah gave me.

‐ She gave you that to get
yourself something nice.

‐ Please don't tell her.

‐ I'll fucking do
as I like, mate.

You're in no position
to tell me what to do.

Fuck.

You haven't said that I smoke
and am therefore a hypocrite.

‐ No, I know.

‐ I am a hypocrite.
I know it.

But I'd rather be a hypocrite
than a fucking liar.

I'll tell you, mate,
if I ever catch you

with cigarettes again,
there will be hell to pay.

Got it?
‐ Got it.

Good.

‐ Please stop.

Please stop crying.

Please, you can't be hungry.

You've already had
a bucketload.

Please, Ava.

I haven't got anything left.

I'm not a fucking dairy farm.

Fine.

Come on, then.

No?

Okay, so you're not hungry.
You're not wet.

You're not windy.
You're not sleepy.

What the fuck
could you possibly want?

Oh.

Oh, okay.

Hello, smiler.

Hi.

Sorry about that.

Hello.

‐ Ally.
‐ Hi.

‐ Come in. Take a seat.

I'll be with you
in just a minute.

So I had my doubts‐‐
well, we both did‐‐

um, but I thought and thought,
and yeah,

I'm sure I wanna keep the baby.

‐ Right.

‐ You don't think I should
'cause of my age.

‐ Ally, I hate to be
the bearer of bad news,

but you're not pregnant.

‐ I am.

‐ You're not.

‐ I am pregnant.

How am‐‐how am I not pregnant?

I mean, I‐‐how?

I've been so hormonal.

‐ That's because
your HCG level is high.

HCG is, indeed,
a pregnancy hormone,

but also, in the early stages
of menopause,

your HCG can spike‐‐

‐ Early, sorry, what?

‐ Basically, the symptoms
of perimenopause

can be almost identical
to pregnancy.

‐ Menopause?

Um...

Hello!

‐ Peri.
Not quite the menopause.

‐ Sorry, but do you know
how old I am?

‐ It's on here, yes.

‐ Well, so it's‐‐
it's just...

menopause?

‐ It is early
but not that unusual.

Have you been having
irregular periods?

Anxiety?

‐ Yes, but‐‐

‐ Any hot flushes
or issues with memory?

‐ Fucking hell.

I thought that was just stress
and lack of sleep

and being pregnant.

Let me print you out
a fact sheet.

It's a lot to take in,
I do understand.

‐ Yeah, going
from being pregnant

to being I don't know what,
um...

Take some time to read.

‐ Barren.

That's it. I'm barren.

‐ You coul
d still get pregnant.

‐ Could I?
‐ Yes.

It wouldn't be easy.

It would most probably
need to be

via assisted conception,

IVF.
‐ Right.

But doesn't that
always mean twins?

‐ Not necessarily.

But you do get a lot of twins.

‐ Oh. Vaginal dryness.

Hi.
‐ Hey.

‐ Ooh. Look at that.

‐ Hey, guess
what I found today.

‐ What?

‐ Packet of cigarettes
in Luke's bag.

‐ No way!
He said he wasn't smoking.

‐ He was lying.

Turns out,
he's a really good liar,

which is gonna make
the next few years interesting.

Said they help him
with his panic attacks.

‐ Bollocks.
‐ No, I know.

How was your day?

‐

I'm not pregnant.

‐ Yeah, you are.
‐ That's what I said.

‐ So the‐‐the tests are wrong.

Can that‐‐can that happen?
You did three.

‐ Yeah, well, it‐‐
it's a mad hormone thing.

I'm not pregnant.
I am perimenopausal.

Don't say that sounds
like a '50s pop star.

‐ I wasn't.

‐ Sure.

‐ So how are we feeling
about that?

‐ Um, well, it's a‐‐

it's a relief, isn't it?

‐ Yes.

Yes, it is a relief.

‐ Shall we?

‐ Not in your condition.

‐ What condition's that,

being one of the fucking
Golden Girls?

‐ Wait up, Blanche.

‐

You still got
that battered sausage?

‐ I'll give you
a battered sausage.

‐

Oh, you absolute
fucking genius.

Mmm, mmm.
‐ Hiya, Mum.

Everything all right?

‐ Yeah, yeah. All good.

Dad told me about you smoking

and you lying about smoking.
Yeah.

I'm really sorry for lying
and smoking.

I'll stop. Smoking's dumb.
So dumb.

You've got
your breathing exercises

to help with your anxiety,

your mindfulness tips,
your one‐to‐ten scale.

Nicotine is a stimulant.
It doesn't calm you down.

Yeah, everyone
experiments, Luke,

but, you know,
don't go any further.

I'm addicted.
I can't give up.

‐ Although I can just enjoy
the odd one now and again.

‐ That's really bad advice.
‐ Yeah, sorry.

‐ Do you want some tea?

‐ Yeah, please.
‐ Yeah, all right. Thanks.

Thanks, man.

What are we gonna do
with him?

‐ Mm.

‐ So our fictional baby,

would she or he have been a mix

of Luke and Ava, do you think,

or someone totally new?

‐ New but with bits of them,
probably.

‐ Mm.

‐ And maybe different bits
of us, better bits.

Yeah.

It's‐‐it's a relief, innit,

not having to deal
with all the new‐baby madness?

‐ Yeah. It's sad too.

Oh, yeah.

It is sad.

I'm sad about it.

‐ I am sad about it.

‐ If you were a pendulum‐‐

‐ Fuck off.