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1
00:00:01,000 --> 00:00:04,083
Uh, what else? I've seen
Dirty Dancing like, ten times...
2
00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:06,164
- Breaks my heart every time, you know?
- Whoa!
3
00:00:06,280 --> 00:00:07,486
Andy!
4
00:00:07,560 --> 00:00:09,608
That Swayze sure
can dance dirty.
5
00:00:09,880 --> 00:00:11,484
Don't you have
any sunblock?
6
00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:13,364
No, Walter J's
been hoarding it.
7
00:00:13,440 --> 00:00:15,807
If you want to worry about a part
of my body, worry about my eyes.
8
00:00:16,480 --> 00:00:18,926
They're like two flaming
meatballs in my skull.
9
00:00:19,160 --> 00:00:22,642
Last week, Andy set sail for the
Bahamas to sell his family's boat.
10
00:00:22,880 --> 00:00:24,803
And he took his
brother but not me.
11
00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:29,485
I was kind of sad at first, but then
I remembered that Bob Marley song,
12
00:00:30,040 --> 00:00:32,281
"No, woman. No cry!"
13
00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:33,847
Check this out.
14
00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:36,450
Keeps my hair
out of my stare.
15
00:00:37,000 --> 00:00:38,411
Also helps me
combat the Glare Bear.
16
00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:39,811
That's what I
call the sun now.
17
00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,446
Andy, it's Darryl. Take
your drawers off your head.
18
00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,570
What else can I show you?
Damn it!
19
00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:49,760
Oh, Andy, was that
your drinking water?
20
00:00:49,880 --> 00:00:53,043
Yeah, it was. That's okay, though.
I've got this cool
21
00:00:53,760 --> 00:00:55,285
desalinator device.
22
00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:59,246
It sucks up sea water through this
hose and pumps out fresh water.
23
00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:01,527
See? Check it out.
24
00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:02,601
Ow!
25
00:01:05,560 --> 00:01:06,641
That's not good.
26
00:01:06,720 --> 00:01:09,690
I'd better sign off.
I need to get going.
27
00:01:09,760 --> 00:01:11,410
I mean, these Skype sessions
are, like, the only thing
28
00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:13,323
that keep me sane
out here, you know?
29
00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:20,044
He's been
sailing for two days.
30
00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:24,845
I'll leave you with this, the
image of a man and his boat!
31
00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:26,684
Burn this into your brains!
32
00:01:27,200 --> 00:01:30,010
Yeah.
No.No, No!
33
00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:36,846
Andy? Andy? Andy? Andy?
34
00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:51,561
Dwight Schrute.
35
00:01:53,840 --> 00:01:55,649
Well, hi there,
David Wallace.
36
00:01:55,760 --> 00:01:58,969
Why would you ever call me when
the manager is out of town?
37
00:01:59,120 --> 00:02:01,088
Well, I have some
very exciting news.
38
00:02:01,160 --> 00:02:03,606
And you didn't call Jim.
That seems significant.
39
00:02:03,720 --> 00:02:05,882
Hi, David! Jim, good. You
should hear this, too.
40
00:02:05,960 --> 00:02:08,008
No, he shouldn't!
What? Jim!
41
00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:09,570
Go ahead, David.
I'm listening.
42
00:02:09,680 --> 00:02:11,887
I... Okay, David, I want
to take you off speaker.
43
00:02:11,960 --> 00:02:15,089
But I don't know
where I'd put you.
44
00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:16,730
Guys, listen.
This is big news.
45
00:02:17,040 --> 00:02:19,850
The Scranton White Pages just
got in contact with my office.
46
00:02:19,920 --> 00:02:22,890
They have apparently dropped their
supplier for the last ten years.
47
00:02:24,240 --> 00:02:25,241
The White Pages.
48
00:02:25,800 --> 00:02:28,007
The White Pages.
Do you want it? No.
49
00:02:28,080 --> 00:02:29,241
Do you use it? No.
50
00:02:29,360 --> 00:02:32,091
Does it inexplicably show up on
your doorstep three times a year?
51
00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:34,447
Yes, yes and yes.
52
00:02:34,520 --> 00:02:36,522
There is a reason we
in the paper industry
53
00:02:36,640 --> 00:02:38,642
call this thing
the White Whale.
54
00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:42,284
Look at all
that sweet blubber.
55
00:02:43,960 --> 00:02:45,371
Look, we need our
top salesman
56
00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:47,363
running point on this,
and Dwight, that is you.
57
00:02:48,560 --> 00:02:50,324
I'm going to need to
put you on hold for a second.
58
00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:55,769
Yeah! Whoo!
59
00:02:56,120 --> 00:02:58,885
Eat it, Jim!
Eat it, Phyllis! Eat...
60
00:02:59,920 --> 00:03:01,524
Where's Stanley?
He's in the bathroom.
61
00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:03,444
Will you run into the bathroom
and tell him to eat it?
62
00:03:03,520 --> 00:03:04,851
Of course.
63
00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:09,088
Yeah! Okay.
Hey, David, I'm back.
64
00:03:09,280 --> 00:03:10,281
Eat it, Stanley!
65
00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:14,566
So, last I remember Tom Peterman
was in charge of that account?
66
00:03:14,640 --> 00:03:16,483
No, my assistant spoke to the
receptionist over there.
67
00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:18,528
It's someone new but she
didn't catch her name.
68
00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:20,801
Her name?
69
00:03:21,040 --> 00:03:23,168
No. Hey, Dwight shouldn't...
70
00:03:23,720 --> 00:03:25,643
Thanks, David! Thank you so
much for calling me today.
71
00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:27,290
Good luck!
Good luck to you.
72
00:03:27,720 --> 00:03:28,801
Dwight, you can't go.
73
00:03:28,920 --> 00:03:31,082
You have a problem with women.
You can't sell to them.
74
00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:33,128
That's a damnable lie.
I love women.
75
00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:35,601
Gina Rogers at Apex Technology
76
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,890
said you called her "Jine-a"
for your entire meeting.
77
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,001
NELLIEI EW.
78
00:03:41,400 --> 00:03:42,401
That's not good.
79
00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:45,041
Yeah, she said she
corrected him five times.
80
00:03:45,640 --> 00:03:46,641
"Jine-a" said that?
81
00:03:46,960 --> 00:03:48,724
Guys, we can't let
Dwight blow this!
82
00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:51,207
An account this size
could double our gross!
83
00:03:51,480 --> 00:03:53,369
That means raises, bonuses.
84
00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:55,685
Pizza Friday could come back.
85
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:58,167
Hey, remember that week in
the '90s when we got bagels?
86
00:03:58,240 --> 00:03:59,765
I miss Clinton.
87
00:03:59,920 --> 00:04:01,001
Can you go instead?
88
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:03,048
Can't. I have the thing.
89
00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:06,523
I have this conference call
today with this company
90
00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:07,880
in Philly
that I'm helping start.
91
00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:09,405
First board meeting.
92
00:04:10,000 --> 00:04:12,207
Also the first time I've ever
been excited about work,
93
00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:14,164
so, that feels
94
00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:16,446
wrong.
95
00:04:17,920 --> 00:04:21,129
Okay, calm down, it's
just me, not Tom Selleck.
96
00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:23,801
Nice.
97
00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:26,850
Toby got us all to
participate in Movember.
98
00:04:27,240 --> 00:04:29,208
It's a charity
for prostate cancer.
99
00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:31,204
You pledge money and
then you grow a mustache
100
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:32,520
for the month of November.
101
00:04:32,840 --> 00:04:34,365
So, this is how
we look now.
102
00:04:34,840 --> 00:04:36,524
I hope you like being
turned on all the time.
103
00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:39,805
Damn!
104
00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:41,405
Just keeps on coming, huh?
105
00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:43,124
I have very
fertile hair glands.
106
00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:48,130
I am so glad I got all of
the dudes to do Movember.
107
00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:51,047
We have the dopest
time back in the annex.
108
00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:52,161
God.
109
00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:54,961
We even go to lunch,
pick up babes.
110
00:04:55,560 --> 00:04:57,244
Smile if you love
men's prostates!
111
00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:03,323
Hi.
Hi.
112
00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:05,571
Spring cleaning?
113
00:05:05,720 --> 00:05:07,370
More like fall cleaning.
114
00:05:10,080 --> 00:05:12,321
I think the Senator
is having an affair.
115
00:05:14,720 --> 00:05:16,245
This doesn't...
116
00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:18,370
I'm sorry, what?
117
00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:21,325
I think the Senator
is having an affair.
118
00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:26,769
I literally have nightmares in
which what just happened happens.
119
00:05:27,440 --> 00:05:28,771
I wake up in a sweat,
120
00:05:29,920 --> 00:05:32,605
and then I make Angela's
husband spoon me back to bed.
121
00:05:34,200 --> 00:05:35,690
When he comes home
in the morning,
122
00:05:35,800 --> 00:05:37,290
he has this
secret little smile.
123
00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:38,806
Aww...
124
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:41,201
I'm sure that's nothing.
125
00:05:41,440 --> 00:05:43,568
And he's always
at the yoga studio.
126
00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:45,643
He never misses
the noon class.
127
00:05:46,320 --> 00:05:47,845
Hot Yoga with Blake.
128
00:05:48,080 --> 00:05:50,606
Angela,
Blake is also a guy's name,
129
00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:53,684
so he may be spending his
afternoons with a guy named Blake,
130
00:05:53,880 --> 00:05:55,484
so nothing to worry about.
131
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:58,441
Huh.
132
00:05:59,320 --> 00:06:01,322
Blake. Who's Blake?
133
00:06:01,400 --> 00:06:02,401
I don't know.
134
00:06:02,520 --> 00:06:04,841
I've just never heard
about the Senator and yoga.
135
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:06,321
Right.
From you.
136
00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:08,971
I'm sure it's
probably nothing.
137
00:06:09,480 --> 00:06:10,766
But what's with
the yoga already?
138
00:06:10,840 --> 00:06:11,887
Right?
And Blake?
139
00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,644
Right! All right,
Angela, calm down.
140
00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:15,888
We need to go and check this out.
What?
141
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,490
Angela, I'll go with you.
142
00:06:19,560 --> 00:06:22,769
So, show us how you'd normally
sell to a female client.
143
00:06:23,120 --> 00:06:24,645
Okay, with pleasure.
144
00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:27,081
Time to learn a few
new tricks, old dog.
145
00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:28,446
You got this, Schrute.
146
00:06:28,520 --> 00:06:32,320
You've just walked
into her office and begin.
147
00:06:33,080 --> 00:06:34,320
Hello.
Hello.
148
00:06:34,400 --> 00:06:35,686
May I please
speak to your boss?
149
00:06:35,800 --> 00:06:37,165
No, she is the boss.
150
00:06:37,240 --> 00:06:38,321
I am?
Yes.
151
00:06:40,680 --> 00:06:43,001
Hi, I'm Mr. Hannon,
how can I help you?
152
00:06:43,080 --> 00:06:44,570
Okay, this isn't
working for me,
153
00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:47,484
because no one would ever believe
that she would be a boss.
154
00:06:47,560 --> 00:06:49,324
He's absolutely right,
I'm really struggling here.
155
00:06:49,440 --> 00:06:51,408
I'll be the buyer.
156
00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:52,681
Okay-
157
00:06:54,040 --> 00:06:56,441
Hello, Mr. Schrute, nice to see you.
Please have a seat.
158
00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:59,291
I never sit down
during sales meetings.
159
00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:01,522
I want to appear
aggressive and imposing.
160
00:07:01,720 --> 00:07:03,609
I am going to sell to
you in 12 minutes.
161
00:07:03,680 --> 00:07:06,968
No, actually, she'd like to take
her time discussing her needs.
162
00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:09,885
I will tell her what her needs
are and then fill them.
163
00:07:10,360 --> 00:07:12,010
This is going to
work out best for you
164
00:07:12,360 --> 00:07:14,886
if you just relax
and do nothing.
165
00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:17,686
And once I'm finished,
it's over.
166
00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:21,520
Okay, let's stop here.
Anyone have any thoughts?
167
00:07:21,600 --> 00:07:23,011
I thought it went great.
168
00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:25,282
I have written down
a few questions.
169
00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:27,682
One, have you ever
killed a woman?
170
00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:29,484
How many women
have you killed?
171
00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:31,211
Please sir,
will you not kill me?
172
00:07:35,720 --> 00:07:36,960
Okay,
let's get started.
173
00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:38,565
Okay, cool. Are we all on?
174
00:07:38,800 --> 00:07:41,610
Well, you're the only one
"on." We're all here.
175
00:07:42,800 --> 00:07:43,926
Right.
176
00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:46,561
Okay, over the next
three months, I...
177
00:07:46,640 --> 00:07:48,847
That's the winter season,
three months.
178
00:07:49,560 --> 00:07:51,961
I had some ideas actually...
179
00:07:52,040 --> 00:07:53,724
Are you at your
office right now?
180
00:07:54,160 --> 00:07:57,482
Yeah. Trust me, I would
rather be with you guys.
181
00:07:57,560 --> 00:07:59,483
Okay. Yeah,
it's sounding kind of
182
00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:01,568
spooky-sexy
over here, Halpert.
183
00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:03,245
Oh.
184
00:08:03,320 --> 00:08:05,402
Sorry. I was
saying that you should probably...
185
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:06,766
Whoa.
186
00:08:07,080 --> 00:08:08,844
I think there's... I think
there's been a mistake.
187
00:08:08,920 --> 00:08:11,161
We're trying to reach Jim
Halpert, not Batman.
188
00:08:13,920 --> 00:08:16,207
You know what?
I should have just had...
189
00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:17,645
I should have just had you
call me on my cell.
190
00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:19,722
Yeah. I'll... I'm going to
try a different spot. Okay?
191
00:08:19,800 --> 00:08:21,290
Okay, yeah. Okay. I'll
call you right back.
192
00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:23,886
Cool. What's happening
in three months?
193
00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:26,931
Okay, when you're
selling to women,
194
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:28,445
it is crucial that
you listen, Dwight.
195
00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:31,164
Also, you want to
respect their...
196
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:34,761
Are you listening now?
197
00:08:35,280 --> 00:08:36,281
Yes.
198
00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:38,369
Okay, well,
you have to show us.
199
00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:41,330
That's impossible. Listening happens
in the ear and in the brain.
200
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:43,368
I mean, some organisms
have external hairs
201
00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:45,448
that vibrate to
indicate auditory stimulation,
202
00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:49,570
but unfortunately our external
hairs don't vibrate at all.
203
00:08:49,640 --> 00:08:51,802
Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
204
00:08:52,000 --> 00:08:53,445
What are you doing?
205
00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:58,209
A little smile and a nod shows
that I hear you. Got it?
206
00:08:58,480 --> 00:08:59,481
Kind of.
207
00:08:59,640 --> 00:09:00,926
Nellie,
why don't you tell Dwight
208
00:09:01,040 --> 00:09:02,280
what we were
doing earlier today,
209
00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:04,124
and Dwight, you show us
that you're listening.
210
00:09:04,480 --> 00:09:08,041
Well, we were in the warehouse
where we were discussing the mural
211
00:09:08,120 --> 00:09:10,088
that I've commissioned
Pam to paint there.
212
00:09:10,200 --> 00:09:11,770
We were talking about
the color schemes
213
00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:13,450
and the major themes
we want to hit.
214
00:09:13,640 --> 00:09:16,086
Children of the world
coming together,
215
00:09:16,240 --> 00:09:18,720
cutting down trees
to make paper,
216
00:09:19,280 --> 00:09:21,328
but not in
a child labor-y way.
217
00:09:21,800 --> 00:09:24,849
It's just up and down, just a
regular nod, like a person.
218
00:09:24,960 --> 00:09:26,121
I am a person.
219
00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,201
Yes. Yeah.
220
00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:29,169
Of course. You're a person.
We can do this. All right?
221
00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:31,090
And then we thought we'd...
222
00:09:31,640 --> 00:09:33,927
I can't. I just, I can't carry
on with that face. Look at it.
223
00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:35,604
I'm going to get
nightmares with that face.
224
00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:38,247
I mean, he looks like
he's laboring over
225
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:40,647
a stool having just
eaten human flesh.
226
00:09:40,920 --> 00:09:42,001
That's a bit extreme.
227
00:09:42,160 --> 00:09:43,241
Yeah, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but that is true.
228
00:09:43,320 --> 00:09:45,322
He's screwed! The meeting
is in less than an hour.
229
00:09:45,600 --> 00:09:48,968
All right, God, Dwight, just
ignore every instinct you have.
230
00:09:49,040 --> 00:09:50,690
It's all garbage. Okay?
231
00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:53,850
You're the woman,
I'm the salesman.
232
00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:55,968
Watch what I do
and try to learn.
233
00:09:56,360 --> 00:09:58,567
Okay, I'm the woman. I'm a woman. Good?
234
00:09:58,840 --> 00:09:59,841
No.
235
00:10:00,480 --> 00:10:02,767
Ms. Thomas!
So good to see you.
236
00:10:03,200 --> 00:10:04,440
Hello.
237
00:10:04,560 --> 00:10:05,800
Are those your kids?
They're so cute.
238
00:10:05,880 --> 00:10:07,041
They could be models.
239
00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:08,924
Thank you.
I'm so proud of them.
240
00:10:09,400 --> 00:10:13,121
I carried each one of them for
nine months inside of my torso
241
00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,009
and then pushed
them out of my vagina.
242
00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:17,208
Boo. Weird.
243
00:10:17,280 --> 00:10:21,001
Okay, well, this is a lost cause.
He's hopeless.
244
00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:25,404
Ten years ago I didn't care if Dwight got
married or died a beet farming bachelor.
245
00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:28,123
But having kids
makes you so soft.
246
00:10:28,920 --> 00:10:31,207
I used to watch Pulp Fiction
and laugh, and now I'm like,
247
00:10:31,280 --> 00:10:33,601
that poor Gimp
is somebody's child.
248
00:10:35,480 --> 00:10:37,608
You know, I think there
could be a lot of benefits
249
00:10:37,680 --> 00:10:39,011
if you could learn to
get along with women.
250
00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:40,930
I have no problem with women.
251
00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:43,048
It's business women
and their...
252
00:10:43,160 --> 00:10:45,925
Their power suits
and their shoulder pads.
253
00:10:46,040 --> 00:10:47,804
Don't lie about
your shoulders!
254
00:10:48,160 --> 00:10:49,446
Dwight, listen to me.
255
00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:53,930
Business women are just normal,
nice, reasonable people.
256
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,925
Who's a nice, reasonable
person, in your experience?
257
00:10:58,520 --> 00:11:01,205
I had a barber once who used
to comb my hair gently.
258
00:11:01,760 --> 00:11:04,081
Okay. So, when you're
selling to this woman,
259
00:11:04,160 --> 00:11:06,481
just imagine she's that nice,
reasonable barber.
260
00:11:07,520 --> 00:11:09,249
Okay. I can do that.
261
00:11:09,320 --> 00:11:10,765
Good. Baby steps.
262
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:12,649
He used to fight dogs.
263
00:11:14,240 --> 00:11:18,689
Like, he used to make dogs fight,
or he actually fought dogs?
264
00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:20,525
Little of this,
little of that.
265
00:11:23,640 --> 00:11:25,210
Which one is
the instructor?
266
00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:26,846
They're all fatties.
267
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,683
Angela. Angela.
What? Where?
268
00:11:30,560 --> 00:11:31,607
The stairs,
the stairs.
269
00:11:31,720 --> 00:11:32,767
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
270
00:11:33,280 --> 00:11:35,965
So wait, Blake is a her.
271
00:11:36,480 --> 00:11:38,289
Oh, my God!
272
00:11:38,560 --> 00:11:40,722
She's so stunningly tiny.
273
00:11:40,960 --> 00:11:43,964
She's like a petite double
zero, for sure. For sure.
274
00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:47,280
Holy cow,
look at what they're doing.
275
00:11:47,720 --> 00:11:50,326
She's repositioning his hips
for Downward Facing Dog.
276
00:11:50,560 --> 00:11:52,642
I've heard of this.
277
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:54,001
D°9 Style!
278
00:11:55,200 --> 00:11:57,123
Wait! Look, Oscar!
279
00:11:57,480 --> 00:11:59,130
Thumbelina has a boyfriend.
280
00:11:59,320 --> 00:12:01,607
And he has a ponytail. Ew.
281
00:12:01,880 --> 00:12:03,723
I'd like to see
that run for office.
282
00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:07,169
Oscar, you were right, I had
nothing to be worried about.
283
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:09,284
Thank you.
Let's go, let's go.
284
00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:12,287
Shut up. Hold on. Hold on.
Hold on. Just, sorry.
285
00:12:13,760 --> 00:12:14,841
Look.
286
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,687
This is fun.
You know?
287
00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:23,010
I mean, this is fun.
288
00:12:23,840 --> 00:12:25,763
What I was saying
is the genius of
289
00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:27,848
Air Jordan was not in
the market saturation,
290
00:12:27,960 --> 00:12:29,564
it was...
291
00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:31,968
It was what?
Sorry...
292
00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:33,530
Jim we're having a lot
of trouble hearing you.
293
00:12:33,560 --> 00:12:37,406
The... What I was saying is, the real
genius was in the...
294
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:40,082
Hey! Are those
skateboarders back?
295
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:41,321
Jim? Jim, are you there?
296
00:12:41,440 --> 00:12:42,521
Where are they?
297
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:44,090
The little punks!
298
00:12:44,240 --> 00:12:45,730
It was in
the authentic design, right?
299
00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:46,767
So, I mean,
you really felt like
300
00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:47,921
Michael Jordan was wearing
these shoes for...
301
00:12:48,000 --> 00:12:50,287
Jim, who's messing with my van?
Nobody.
302
00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:52,044
Jordan wore them for nobody?
303
00:12:52,120 --> 00:12:54,248
No, no. We're not
following you, Halpert.
304
00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:56,807
This ends now!
305
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,601
Have a seat.
She will be right in.
306
00:13:00,680 --> 00:13:03,206
Great. I'm sorry, do you
mind telling me her name?
307
00:13:03,280 --> 00:13:04,964
I realize we don't have it.
308
00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:08,320
Uh, she'll be right in.
309
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:09,765
Okay, great.
She'll...
310
00:13:09,840 --> 00:13:10,921
Okay-
311
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:14,724
Just a little off the top,
and then a nice combing.
312
00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:18,886
Yeah. Just comb it.
313
00:13:27,240 --> 00:13:29,004
Oh, my God.
314
00:13:30,280 --> 00:13:31,281
It's Jan.
315
00:13:32,320 --> 00:13:34,561
Dear God in heaven.
316
00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:39,804
Jan used to be
one of my superiors,
317
00:13:39,920 --> 00:13:41,843
and she is one of
the most erratic
318
00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:43,928
and terrifying people
I have ever met.
319
00:13:46,760 --> 00:13:48,922
You son of a bitch! You're firing me?
I answered you...
320
00:13:49,200 --> 00:13:50,611
Where the hell do you get off?
321
00:13:50,880 --> 00:13:53,804
Jim and I are pretty sure she had
an affair with her ex-assistant, Hunter.
322
00:13:53,920 --> 00:13:54,921
He was 17.
323
00:13:55,560 --> 00:13:56,607
But she looks great!
324
00:13:57,800 --> 00:13:59,450
If she asks, will you
tell her I said that?
325
00:14:00,800 --> 00:14:02,370
Forget
everything we taught you!
326
00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:10,280
Hey, Jan!
It's so great to see you.
327
00:14:10,360 --> 00:14:11,964
Where's Wallace?
What?
328
00:14:12,200 --> 00:14:14,328
I was under the impression
David Wallace would be coming.
329
00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:15,811
He bought back
Dunder Mifflin, correct?
330
00:14:16,000 --> 00:14:17,001
Hey!
331
00:14:18,320 --> 00:14:20,482
Your daughter could
be a bubble bath model.
332
00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:22,842
I could just
bite her head off.
333
00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:26,124
Sorry.
334
00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:28,125
David is in Vermont.
335
00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:30,407
Did you speak with him?
He sent Dwight instead.
336
00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:31,641
Molly!
337
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:35,282
David Wallace
is in Vermont.
338
00:14:35,640 --> 00:14:37,642
Oh, my God.
I talked to his assistant,
339
00:14:37,800 --> 00:14:39,802
and I guess it did
get a little confusing
340
00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:41,769
because you said not
to tell anyone your name.
341
00:14:41,880 --> 00:14:44,645
And then also, these Bluetooths
are very hard to hear with.
342
00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:45,846
I know you love
the way they look,
343
00:14:45,920 --> 00:14:47,126
but Tom never had
us use them, so...
344
00:14:47,240 --> 00:14:50,801
Molly? I am not Tom. lam Jan.
345
00:14:51,480 --> 00:14:52,811
I'm so sorry, Jan.
346
00:14:56,840 --> 00:14:58,285
Anyway-
347
00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:03,243
Thought it would be fun to
have a little chat with
348
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,322
David Wallace
after all these years.
349
00:15:06,040 --> 00:15:07,804
Oh, Well.
350
00:15:10,680 --> 00:15:12,444
What are you doing?
Listening.
351
00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:13,681
- Stop.
- Sorry.
352
00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:14,966
Stop that.
Okay.
353
00:15:16,880 --> 00:15:20,726
So, this was all just a trick? You don't
really have any business to give?
354
00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:22,924
No, I do.
355
00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:24,610
But not to us.
356
00:15:24,720 --> 00:15:26,165
Insightful, Pam.
357
00:15:27,000 --> 00:15:30,288
You did good, Dwight. It's okay.
Seriously, Jan's not normal.
358
00:15:30,360 --> 00:15:32,601
Let's just go. She's not
going to sell to us.
359
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,125
Yes, she is.
360
00:15:35,920 --> 00:15:37,922
Now, I may not have
any instincts with women,
361
00:15:38,040 --> 00:15:39,929
butlhave
an instinct for sales.
362
00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:41,764
You keep her occupied,
I'll be right back.
363
00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:43,161
What?
364
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:45,001
Pam.
Yeah?
365
00:15:45,080 --> 00:15:46,445
I'm a very
busy woman, so...
366
00:15:46,520 --> 00:15:49,683
Yeah, do you have any
other pictures of Astrid?
367
00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:53,724
Fine, I will show you
one slideshow.
368
00:15:56,240 --> 00:15:57,446
Erin, did this call come...
369
00:15:58,320 --> 00:16:00,322
Sorry. I just...
I saw your face.
370
00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:01,401
Oh.
371
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:02,881
I'm sorry.
It's for the thing.
372
00:16:03,040 --> 00:16:04,166
I know. That's great.
373
00:16:04,480 --> 00:16:06,289
It just, it makes it look
like there's an eyebrow
374
00:16:06,400 --> 00:16:07,731
in the middle of your face.
375
00:16:07,920 --> 00:16:08,967
Wow.
376
00:16:09,040 --> 00:16:13,329
A handsome eyebrow! But it makes
your mouth look like an eye socket.
377
00:16:13,400 --> 00:16:14,401
Which isn't bad!
378
00:16:14,560 --> 00:16:16,767
Uh-huh. Butyoulook
like a cyclops
379
00:16:17,400 --> 00:16:19,880
whose eye fell out.
380
00:16:20,720 --> 00:16:23,485
Which is great.
It's such a great cause.
381
00:16:25,080 --> 00:16:26,161
Yeah.
382
00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:34,760
Mommy, you're a princess
383
00:16:34,920 --> 00:16:39,289
Mommy, you're a superstar
384
00:16:39,400 --> 00:16:43,530
Mommy, you're the greatest
385
00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:45,762
How can I ever
fill your shoes?
386
00:16:51,560 --> 00:16:54,211
Your voice is
as lovely as ever.
387
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:55,281
Oh...
388
00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:57,681
And it is so cute
how she signs her name.
389
00:16:57,760 --> 00:17:00,491
That was... That was me, too.
390
00:17:00,720 --> 00:17:04,327
Okay. It's just, that's how Cece
does it, with the backwards Es.
391
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:05,840
Cece can't spell her name?
392
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:07,286
Actually, she can.
393
00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:08,885
Well, it's not really much
of a comparison, is it?
394
00:17:08,960 --> 00:17:11,566
I mean, "Cece" is two
letters, and "Astrid" is...
395
00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:15,520
I mean, there's even some
adults who can't spell it.
396
00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:16,965
Of course.
Can you spell it?
397
00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:19,801
Try to spell it, Pam.
398
00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:21,041
Um...
399
00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:22,281
"A,"
400
00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:25,962
"X"? I don't...
You got me.
401
00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:28,521
Don't patronize me.
402
00:17:28,840 --> 00:17:31,366
I'm so sorry. I hate this.
You're better.
403
00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:33,729
Okay, we should go now.
Let's go.
404
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:37,407
Wait, just... Just
waitjust a minute. Just watch.
405
00:17:43,320 --> 00:17:47,086
Wait, why are you... Oh. Are you
getting yourjollies right now?
406
00:17:47,680 --> 00:17:49,364
Can't get enough
of the show?
407
00:17:49,800 --> 00:17:51,086
Yourjollies
are all on fire.
408
00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:53,845
Please! It's Robert
who's enjoying it!
409
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,081
What?
410
00:17:55,280 --> 00:17:56,930
This could be the affair
that you're scared of.
411
00:17:57,000 --> 00:17:58,490
Politicians are
wonderful liars.
412
00:17:58,680 --> 00:18:00,170
You never know
who they really are.
413
00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:07,523
But he's probably not gay.
He's straight.
414
00:18:08,320 --> 00:18:09,685
He's straight, so...
415
00:18:14,200 --> 00:18:16,567
Excuse me, could I get
some more water? No.
416
00:18:18,000 --> 00:18:21,447
Jan, you thought I had no
more cards left to play.
417
00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:23,363
Well, I've got one.
Man-Boy!
418
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:26,682
The Ace of Babes.
419
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:27,801
Oh, my God.
420
00:18:27,880 --> 00:18:28,961
Where's the Quiznos?
421
00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:32,481
You're the Quiznos.
422
00:18:32,600 --> 00:18:34,728
Jan, may I introduce
to you,
423
00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:37,127
your own personal
Dunder Mifflin liaison,
424
00:18:37,280 --> 00:18:41,649
devoted to servicing this account
with total client satisfaction.
425
00:18:41,880 --> 00:18:43,803
I sense that Molly
426
00:18:44,080 --> 00:18:46,560
wasn't quite
meeting your needs.
427
00:18:47,320 --> 00:18:50,881
Nothing like
your old assistant.
428
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:53,564
Hunter,
was that his name?
429
00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:59,569
I... I don't recall.
And yes, Molly is crap.
430
00:18:59,720 --> 00:19:01,882
Okay, you do not
have to do this.
431
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:04,448
Do what? Get into sales?
That's what I want.
432
00:19:05,840 --> 00:19:08,650
He's been growing
that mustache for weeks.
433
00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:10,281
Best he can do.
434
00:19:11,040 --> 00:19:12,371
So young.
435
00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:16,210
Will you...
436
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:19,090
You. Can you
turn around for me, please?
437
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,202
Dwight, you can go. I will
call you in a week or so
438
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:26,169
and let you know whether
I want your business.
439
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:27,241
Thank you.
Very good.
440
00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:32,610
Do you have
a valid passport?
441
00:19:36,920 --> 00:19:37,921
Jim Halpert.
442
00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,081
Hey, it's Colin.
443
00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:41,811
Hey, man.
lam so sorry about that.
444
00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:43,769
No, don't worry about it.
445
00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:46,961
It's just,
it's not totally working.
446
00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:50,966
Yeah, no, I know. This whole
telecommuting thing, not ideal.
447
00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:52,246
But don't worry,
I'll figure it out.
448
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:55,961
Yeah, it's not just not ideal.
I mean, with you there,
449
00:19:56,040 --> 00:19:57,929
I don't know how
we're going to do this.
450
00:20:01,240 --> 00:20:02,969
What does...
What does that mean?
451
00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:06,288
Oscar, what is
happening here?
452
00:20:06,440 --> 00:20:08,966
Why would you say you think
the Senator might be gay?
453
00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:11,281
I don't know, Angela.
I'm dehydrated.
454
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:14,530
Maybe you heard me wrong.
We should just go.
455
00:20:15,400 --> 00:20:17,687
Look, look, here he comes! Here he comes.
He's coming, he's coming.
456
00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:23,562
What is he doing? He's
making a phone call.
457
00:20:41,320 --> 00:20:44,403
Hey, Molly.
You should just quit.
458
00:20:44,560 --> 00:20:45,561
Yeah.
Yeah.
459
00:20:45,680 --> 00:20:46,681
Thanks.
460
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,125
Oh, and Molly?
461
00:20:49,840 --> 00:20:53,606
I know it can't be easy working for Jan.
Good luck with your feelings.
462
00:20:56,920 --> 00:21:00,083
Dwight!
That was really nice.
463
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:02,363
You should ask
for her number.
464
00:21:02,600 --> 00:21:03,806
I got her number.
465
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:06,244
Four-one-five-Y-C-L.
466
00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:07,961
That's a license number?
467
00:21:08,120 --> 00:21:09,281
That's all you need.
468
00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:13,081
And when I have curried favor
with her, I will let you know.
469
00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:15,205
Why me?
470
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:18,250
Because you are my friend
and you are a woman.
471
00:21:19,680 --> 00:21:23,287
And women love gossip.
It's like air to you people.
472
00:21:23,360 --> 00:21:26,364
Ugh. God!
34642
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