All language subtitles for The.Office.US.S08E11.Trivia.720p.BrRip.2CH.x265.HEVC-PSA

Oh, yeah

Kevin!
As soon as I
heard that wrapper

You really have
to say, "Oh, yeah,'

every time you
eat a candy bar?

I can't help it, Oscar
It's just really good

Oh, yeah

My hands are tied
All right, not bad at all

20 minutes, though
so let's try again

Get it all out
now if you have to

It was a raccoon
eating a hamburger
like a person.

You need to stop
banging your pen
on your desk,

or it's gonna
drive me insane
Okay, got it.

Does anyone have
a first-aid kit?

Check out
this song I wrote.

I'm gonna love you
downstairs tonight

Listen, I say

I mean, he looked
like a little Hamburglar

All right, here we go

Everybody
get ready in three, two
Good luck. One

Love letters.
Yes, I love it

What else can be
done with paper?

You can write
a book about chairs

Books. Excellent, Jim

All right, Andy,
please, please, just stop

You can do infinite
things with paper.

Did you hear that?

Infinity. There is
an infinity of things
that you can do with paper

Now, who wants
to buy some paper?

Yeah

Very nice
Very nice sales pitch

for our clients that
don't know what paper is

I'm talking about you guys

Who in this room right now
wants to buy some paper?

Let's get high
on our own supply

Andy, you want us
to buy our own paper?

Yes

Robert said that we needed
to double our sales
growth to 8%

by the end of the quarter
That's today,
and we are $830 short.

And I can't afford
to keep buying paper from us,

so today we need to
sell $830 of paper,

and then next quarter I need to sell

the $2,200 of paper
that's in my garage.

Animals, machines,
vast virtual armies.

All of these things I have successfully managed.

The only thing I
haven't managed is people

I saw an ad on
the Sabre website

for an open manager position
in their printers division.

I spoke to Robert
California about it,

and he said for me to come by
and see him some time.

So like
a Spanish conquistador,

I have come to Florida
to claim what is
rightfully mine.

Dwight Schrute for
Robert California.

Oh. Hello, Mr. Schrute
I'll tell him you're here
Can I get you anything at all?

I'm not here to
be given anything

I'm here to take
what is mine

Ooh.
I'm glad you're on our team
Here, please have a seat.

Dwight?
What are you doing here?

Gabe. You don't know?

Of course I know

Hmm. Impressive
office you have here

Surrounded by shrubbery
Like a squirrel's office

Corporate says to me
"Gabe, we need you
in Scranton."

Scranton says,
"Gabe, go back down

to Florida
You're needed there.'

So Tuesdays and Thursdays
I'm up there.

Mondays,
Wednesdays and Fridays
I'm down here

I can think of no better way
to confront my
deathly fear of flying

Dwight.
Robert

You made it
Yes

Impressive initiative

I don't know what's worse
the trip or the destination.

Well, let me settle in

And I'll be with you shortly

Very good

Hey, C-SPAN

So my Dad says an accountant
can really help you out

if they're
willing to play ball.
Those were his words

Gosh, Andy, you had
a great quarter, okay?

Robert will understand
$800 is a rounding error

So make that error
Andy, no

Hey, I can
make that error
Oh

Well, it's just I know
that making errors sounds
like your kind of thing,

but it's a little more
complicated than that.
No, I

It's just I really need
a real accountant on this

What do you say?

because tonight
I have a trivia
contest in Philadelphia

Aw

Any other crunch time
I would love

to stay and cook
the books for you

so you can save face
in front of your CEO

but tonight is
Triviacolypse
What?

It's only the biggest night
of trivia of the year

There's a $1 ,000 prize

I'm committed to my friends
They're committed to me

You know what? Go. Have fun

There's a trivia contest
at a bar in Philadelphia

Stop right there
I love it.
I'm in.

It's trivia.
In Philadelphia

But here's the best part
The prize is $1 ,000

and if we win,
we can use that
money to buy paper here

close the gap on our
8% profit increase.

That's a great idea. Yeah
That's a great plan.

Yeah? You like it?
All right
All right, good stuff.

I'm so psyched you
guys are into it,
'cause I thought

"This sounds really stupid.'

You just made a good idea
a great idea.

There is one
problem with this plan
What?

We'd have to leave work
like, right now to do this

You can reduce
your prices by 1 0%

or we're gonna be
finding a new source
for our morning bagels

All right

Gabe, I always wondered
what it is you
did around here

Now I found out
You're the bagel guy

Yeah, but not just bagels
All unwanted problems.

Question
What's the most important
appliance in your house?

Meat grinder.
Too slow. It's the toilet

And I am the toilet
of this office

annoying problems

so others can keep
their hands clean,

and just like a toilet I am essential.

You know, Gabe,
you could have gone

with garbage disposal
incinerator, or eraser

And instead
you chose toilet

God bless you
You are an American classic

Dwight, today is not my
day at all, I'm afraid

I'm not going to be
able to meet with you

But I'm leaving you
in the very
capable hands of our COO

But I can give you
this pitch in one minute

He's gonna meet
with you later.

No, no, no. I don't
want you to rush it, okay?

Trust me. Meet with Bill

He's a great person to know
I'll dialog with him tonight

CEO to COO
What a difference
a letter makes.

Still an important position
Still a chief.

You're really
going to like Bill

He has me toilet
a lot of people for him

Hallway phone.
Gabe Lewis speaking

Gabe, listen to me.
Don't bother Bill with this.

He needs to go put out a fire
on the home front.

Just wait 20 minutes,
and then I want you
to listen to Dwight's p\itch.

Make him feel valued.
Make him feel heard.

Your wish is my command

It's a command.

What are you
doing here, Andy?
You left us no choice

But this should put
a smile on your face

How would you
like to be captain
of the Dunder Mifflin team?

Although I reserve
the right to overrule you
What? No.

And you guys thought
this was a good idea?

a fun idea.

There were times on the
two and a half hour drive
when I experienced doubt

But that's the thing
about long drives

you know?
You're always going

This is a gay bar
Wait, what?

Everyone in here is gay?

Yes. It's a gay bar
so you guys want
to go home now?

No.
No

No
Awesome

What does this say about you
that you followed me here?

That you think
you're going to win

your sales quota at
a gay bar's trivia night?

It says that I believe
in my staff's intelligence

and that I'm
willing to try anything

Not "anything.'

Good luck

All right, we need to
divide up into teams

but it's winner take all
so no need to divide evenly

We need an A team
a backup team,
and a just-have-fun team

So you guys all
know yourselves

Good timers, follow me

Back-ups

Go on, kid. You know
you don't belong here

A team
Okay

All right, everybody,
nice self awareness

Except

Okay

There's a table over here

All right,
first question, everyone.

Ray Charles famously had
this state on his mind.

What is its capital?

Oh, we got this

Let's reverse engineer this

You're a black singer
Where do you go?

Somewhere where
you're a novelty

Alaska
Atlanta.

I know you think that,
because that's where
the Olympics were held

My cousins were
actually at those Olympics

Keep talking all you want

How am I supposed to know
what was on his mind?

Ooh! What do blind
people think about?

Okay, dogs, canes
signs, manholes, stairs
piano, darkness.

Okay, time's up.
Let's get the boards up.

Atlanta, Georgia is
the correct answer.

What?

Hey, man. Uh

Look, unfortunately,
Bill had to go fight a fire

so, your appointment got

There's no fires
within eight miles of here

Well, it's nine miles away

I'm going to be
meeting with you
on his behalf.

What? No, no.
Excuse me, lady

Get anyone from
the COO's office
on the phone this instant

This must be
very frustrating

I can see you in
the jungle now

Hey, now, you're not
an All-Star of the NBA,
but you did get your game on

when you won the NBA's
Sixth Man of
the Year Award in 201 1.

Who are you?

Jim, Darryl,
your time to shine

Shawn Marion.
Yes. Shawn Marion

That doesn't sound right
I want to say
LaDamien Washington?

Wrong for so many reasons

Well, I know
Elizabeth Taylor's sixth man

was Richard Burton
Is that helpful?

That's it.
I'm gonna go watch
the boats on the river

Ron Artest, Kelly

No, it's Lamar Odom

If it had been Ron Artest
it would have

come up on
Dancing with the Stars

when they pan
over his trophy case

when he's at home
with his family

Lamar winning Sixth
Man was a big storyline
on Chloe and Lamar.

All right, boards up.
Let's see who got it.

Lamar Odom is what
we were looking for.

Lamar Odom.

Oh, my God
Lamar Odom

Nice. Nicely done

You're my sports guys
You're ESPN.
You're ESPN Classic

Ryan is MSNBC.
I'm E!, TLC and Oxygen

Chill, man.
This plan is airtight

So it's a very
simple argument

of why I should
be put in charge
of southeast printer sales

Nobody has sold more printers
in the northeast than me.

Bottom line,
I know the product
I get it.

Well, you got my vote

Oh, my God
Yeah.

Most of all, I believe
that character is destiny

and my character
is one that...

Wait, why are you smiling?

What?
What's with the smile?

You're doing great
So good.

And my character is one
that will never give up

until greatness is on
the horizon behind us

Dwight, that was
a fantastic presentation.
Put your hand on my hand

Flush

Ow

Take me to Robert
Ow. He went home.

Take me to his house
It's a condo.

It's long-term
business housing

You know where it is
Lead me there

Ow. Stephanie, help

Listen, you're
a perfectly fine toilet

I'm just an extraordinary
piece of crap. Let's go.

Ow

Excuse me, sir,
on the Dunder Mifflin A team.

Excuse me, sir.
Yeah?

I'm sure you're just checking
your Grindr account.

But you can't
check smartphones

during trivia.
It's against the rules.

Okay, I'm turning it off

Okay, you're not
turning it off.

Sir.

Okay, then we're gonna
have to take it away.

Thank you. Thank you.

Okay, I can't not
have my phone. I'm sorry

All right, guys,
after nine rounds,
let's check the scores.

In first place
with nine points,
it's Aesop's Foibles.

The Queerenstein
Bears have seven points.

Dunder Mifflin
A team has four points.

All right

The D.M. Backup Team
has three points.

The Einsteins
have eight points.

Ladies Gaga have five points.

Yeah

So our best chance
of hitting our mark

is now in the hands
and brains of Kevin
Meredith, Erin and Kelly

Do I like these odds?

My answer is no.
Whoo!

Which one is it?
I don't know!
All I know is the building

Robert! Robert California

Robert
Dwight

How nice of Gabe to
show you where I live

Come around, 102

All right, guys, time's up.

Who was the relatively
unknown patent clerk

who discovered
that energy equals

mass times
the speed of light squared?

Looks like
everyone gets a point
for Albert Einstein.

Wait, except
for the Einsteins.

That's all right.

Which means
the top three teams

are going to finish it
off in the speed round.

So let's get
everyone some bells.

In third place,
we have the Einsteins.

Oh, yeah
What?

Second place, we have
the Queerenstein Bears.

Yeah
Come on!

And first place
is Aesop's Foibles.

Whoo

Yeah, but they're
going to get clobbered

Ring it in when you know it.
First question.

This man had a fatwa
declared on him when...

Einsteins?

What?
What is it?

I'm just the bell girl

Aesop's?

Salman Rushdie.
Salman Rushdie is correct.

Heading out to sea, sailors.

On a square-rigged
ship, the sail

set furthest
forward is called what?

Princess Ding-Dong
do not hit that bell...

Flying jib

Flying jib is
correct for the Einsteins.

Flying jib. Flying jib

No way

Gentlemen

Give us just a minute.
Stew and I are just
finishing up our lesson

Trust me,
one nine-minute bout

is a cardiovascular equivalent
of running uphill
for three hours.

I could go to
the gym three times a week

or I can wrestle
Stew once a month

Grab my leg

Yay, Robert

Guys, please help
yourself to some drinks
from the fridge.

According to a recent survey,

this is the most
common learning disability
among American adolescents.

Boom! ADHD
No.

Wrong.
The answer is dyslexia

That's correct
for the Einsteins.

All right
Whoo! Yeah

Sir, sir. Dial it back.
This isn't Tail Feathers,
okay?

Yeah

They haven't really improved
on the Oreo, have they?

No, thank you

Sit down, Dwight

Let me tell you
why I should be

the next manager
with a riddle.

A manager
a salesman, a leader

and a warrior walk
into a restaurant.

The hostess says
"Table for one?"

How is this possible?

You were dining alone
All those people are you

Yes. Exactly.
Riddle number two
Who is going...

Your drive, your ambition
it would be wasted
on a manager's job.

And Florida,
you don't want to live here

Even I don't
want to live here

It's why I'm always at
my place in Scranton

Florida is America's basement

It's wet.
It's filled with mold
strange insects, alligators

Alligators are
dinosaurs, Dwight.
You know that, right?

Eh... It's complicated

This medal was
my grandfather's

He received it
for acts of courage
for excellence

It's a tribute
one man gives another

a job, Dwight.

But why not let me give you
something even better?

It's a job interview
Not a flea market.

Dwight, the job is
not right for you.

Now, when something
comes along

that is right for you
I'll try you out.

Now get the he
out of my place

Yes

Final round.
Last two teams squaring off.

ready to play doctor.

Our question is
about health
and the human body.

Oh, come on

The standard
American analog scale

has a maximum
capacity of what weight?

Three hundred pounds

Point for the Einsteins.

Here's your final question.
Cinephiles, put on
your memory berets.

This 2001 masterpiece
from Gilles Paquet-Brenner

explores
the intricate dynamics
of a family in disarray.

Yes

I'm sorry, no.
Over to the Einsteins.

Les Jolies Choses.
- Are you sure?

Marion Cotillard
exposes herself

a number of times
in that film.

The Einsteins win it.

No
Yeah

Come on

Look, I know it's easy to say
tonight was just a fluke,

and maybe it was,
but here's a piece of trivia

A fluke is one of
the most common fish
in the sea

So if you go
fishing for a fluke,

chances are you
just might catch one.

Oh, boy.

Welcome to
the Stonewall Alliance
Trivia Championship\s!

First prize is $2,500.

Let's just do our thing,
collect our hardware
and get the hell home

Whoo
Riboflavin.

Riboflavin?

Michigan.

The President of
the United States

is POTUS.

John Steinbeck wrote
The Grapes of Wrath