Original subtitles

[silence]

[electronic ding]

[Toby, narrating] I always said,

if I got a terminal illness,

I'd pack up my family

and drive out the last of my days in an RV.

Cruisin' under the sun,

burning down that big blue highway.

The weight of the world,

just disappearin' to dust in the rear-view mirror.

But then I started thinkin', "You know it'd be a lot more

fun going on a road trip

if your days aren't numbered."

So, when we had enough dough, the husband and I bought one.

A 2005 Ford Fleetwood Jamboree.

We named it Harvey.

And then, the cosmic punch line.

My husband found out

he did have a terminal disease

and three months later, he was dead.

[vehicle approaching]

In the five years since, the girls and I must have

put a whoppin' 50 miles on Harvey's odometer.

But now, here we are bumpin' down the road.

Zelda, Lulu, Toby.

Oh, that's me. And Harvey.

[RV horn honks] Ah!

Fuckers!

[laughing] Who did that? [Lulu] Zelda did it!

[children laugh] Zelda did it.

[Zelda] I didn't do it.

I didn't think it would kill you.

I didn't do it. [Zelda] Yes you did!

[children laugh] - I didn't do it.

Zelda did it. - Mom, did you piss on yourself?

Oh my God! [all laughing]

[Toby] Oh my God, you are so dead.

[hard rock music playing *]

[laughing]

Mom!

**

[laughing]

[yelling]

**

[child whispering] Rumblestrips.

[Lulu, narrating] I sat behind Josh in class

and I thought he had nice hair.

The first time I talked to him was because he turned

around and asked if he could borrow a pencil.

He was really cute.

When I talked to him again, after class,

I was so excited and blushy and nervous.

I didn't talk to him again for, like, a month.

Then, I asked if he wanted to have a playdate

and on the playdate I asked him

if he liked anyone and he said,

[imitating dumb boy] "Well, you tell me first,

who do you like?" So I said, "Fine.

Tell me all the guys in our class,

and I'll tell you, you know, if I don't like them."

And then he guessed down all the guys

and I said no to all of them.

And then he said, "There's no one left but me. Is it me?"

And I said, "Maybe..." [laughs] "Yes."

And then we went out. I liked when we held hands.

His hands were so soft and warm.

When he found out that I was going to take off on this RV trip,

he said maybe we should break up.

Just while I was gone

since we wouldn't be seeing each other.

And I just said okay.

[Zelda] Ooh, hotel! [Lulu] Oh, yeah.

Let's go to the hotel. [Toby] No.

[Zelda] Can we stay there? - No.

[Lulu] Mom! Come on! [Zelda] Why not?

- Please? - Let's go to the hotel.

[Toby] No. We're staying in the RV.

[Lulu] I don't wanna stay in the fuckin' RV.

[Zelda] Come on. [Toby] Nuh-uh.

[fake crying] Please. [Lulu] Come on.

[Toby] No! - I don't wanna stay in the RV, Mom.

Come on! [arguing fades out]

[girls laughing fades in]

Wee! [laughing]

Vee-oom!

Hey!

You guys are gonna get me in trouble.

[laughing continues] I said, would you shut it!

- Is there a pool here? - No!

[quiet chuckle]

[smacking matches pack, match lights]

[shower spraying]

This hotel sucks.

Which book are you reading?

[Lulu] The Holy Bible.

- Any good? - Yeah, it's good.

It's kind of confusing

and a bit weird, but it's good.

Have you got to any good parts in it?

I guess. It's all kind of the same.

What's it about?

God making things like Earth and birds and sea creatures.

Lights, and stars, and land.

- This hotel sucks. - Yup.

No doubt about that.

[Toby] Okay, Lulu.

Today I'm gonna teach you how to make

the perfect fried egg.

'Cause that's what you and Zelda like

and grandma's eggs suck.

You paying' attention? Okay.

First...

You get a lot of butter in there...

Ah, yeah. Ooh.

Then...

You crack it.

Hmm.

Well, scrambled eggs work, too.

We go.

Look, I scrambled 'em for you today.

[sighs] I'm not eating that crap.

Oh come on, just pretend you're in a restaurant.

Okay. Check, please!

[Lulu] What's this?

Um, it's a tampon.

[disgusted groan]

Looks like a cigarette for your vagina.

[as Groucho Marx] Well, that's 'cause I got one smokin' vagina.

[Lulu groans]

How do you use it?

Um, well...

... If this is your vagina, you just,

kind of push it up like that.

And...you're good to go. - Hmm.

How do you take it out?

Oh, that's what the string's for.

[guffawing]

Okay.

I wonder when I'll get my period.

Probably in the next year or two.

Hmm.

What are you lookin' at?

Let's get donuts!

[Toby, narrating] It all started with a seed.

Seed in my pocket, actually.

See, in college, we couldn't afford the good shit.

So, it was Mexican dirt weed all the way.

[scoffs] Man, you should have heard

those pipes crackin' and poppin'.

It was only a matter of time, of course,

before one of those seeds

found its way into the lint dark corner of my pocket.

Now, it's important to know

that I don't throw anything away.

So, I put that seed in a cup of dirt.

Two months later, I put it in a bucket of dirt.

Five months later,

[disbelieving exhale] man, you should have seen me

try to load that thing into a van I borrowed

to drive it halfway across

the country to my mom's garden.

By summer's end,

I had myself a semester's worth

of free Mexican dirt weed.

Grown by yours truly.

[bird chirping]

[Lulu, narrating] I don't remember much about my dad.

I hate that.

And when I see pictures of us,

I feel bad because we look so happy together.

I wish memories were stickier.

Sometimes, I think Zelda's lucky.

Because she doesn't remember him at all.

But I have this one memory of my dad.

Mom was crying in the bathroom like a baby.

I didn't know whether if she was happy crying

or sad crying.

But Dad went in there and hugged her for a long time.

And then, he came out and made us all ice cream.

Peach, with tons of whipped cream.

He loved peach. Ooh.

I love peach, too.

And I really love peach yogurt.

But only if the fruit's all mixed up.

I hate when it's on the bottom.

[crow caws]

[Toby] Ah! I forgot the soccer ball.

I'm gonna go back and get it.

[Lulu, narrating] A few years ago,

she stopped crying in the bathroom.

Now I just think she just goes in there to smoke.

She doesn't think I know. But I do.

She blows it out the window.

And then she comes back in all lovey-dovey.

It's kind of corny.

But Zelda likes it when she acts that way.

But I'm glad she stopped crying.

[melancholic music *]

[Toby sighs happily] I love you, Lulu.

[Lulu] Yeah, I know.

Hey, Mom? - Yeah, babe?

What if I don't like the school at Grandma's?

Oh, you're gonna love it. It's a great school.

- How do you know? - 'Cause I went there.

They got a great soccer team. - They do?

Uh-huh.

How am I gonna see my old friends?

Oh, don't worry, Lu.

Grandma's totally gonna hook you up.

I promise.

I hope so, Mom.

[distant waves crashing]

[Lulu] This beach is pretty.

[Toby] It sure is.

**

[Zelda, narrating] When Mom says

that when people die, they become everything.

Like, people will become

trees and the sky

and the mountains and even dirt.

I think my dad became the moon.

'Cause when we drive at night,

I look out the window and the moon follows me.

[owl hooting]

[waves crashing]

[Toby, narrating] Remember that seed I mentioned before?

Well, my husband also had a way with seeds.

He came from a farming family in northern California

and had been poking the earth

with seeds since, God knows when.

But we never aimed to sell.

Just grow our own and share generously.

Why not, you know?

We had the right land,

we had the perfect Cali climate,

and liked gettin' high.

On days the kids were in school,

and the mist was coming off

the coast like thick whipped cream,

we'd hike up to our modest grow,

have a smoke, and make out like teenagers.

Our fingers all sticky from the buds.

His hands were always gettin' caught in my crazy hair.

And now and then throughout the day,

I'd get whiff of that sweet earthy stuff

and look forward to our next trip up to the grow.

It was insanely romantic.

Mom, hey!

Yeah. [laughs]

Oh, we're great. Everyone's great.

We've been all the way up the coast.

No, no. We--Not yet.

We still got time. Yes, we do.

Hey look, Mom. I--

Mom, you know I don't know

how long they're gonna live with you.

That's what we're all waitin' to find out.

[quietly] Yeah. Oh, you know what, Mom?

I'm all out of quarters

but I just wanted to call and check in and,

um, say that I love you.

We'll, uh--you know, I'll call you

back soon and we'll-we'll talk more about it, okay?

I love you. Bye.

[alternative rock music *]

[Toby, narrating] Cancer is a mean, nasty bitch.

Ugly too. My lover got it.

He was tough as shit.

But it's like goin' to war by yourself against yourself.

I'm not tryin' to be dramatic or sing a sad song.

I'm just tellin' you what it was.

It was frustrating for my man

that he never got to take us all on a trip in Harvey.

He'd always wanted to drive

way up to Denali or camp out in the Olympics.

Instead he had to deal

with the bureaucracy of dying.

**

[arrow releases]

[screeching music *]

Mom!

Mom!

Mom, Zelda got totally fucked up.

C'mon. Follow me.

[screeching intensifies *]

[Lulu] Oh, my God. - Oh, Zee!

Mom?

[screeching stops]

[sighs] - Gotcha.

[Toby pants]

- Oh, my God. [Lulu] Gotcha.

[Zelda laughs] You guys are bitches.

[Lulu] You know, I think I could be an actor.

[girls giggle]

[relaxing music *]

[Toby, narrating] Now here's the dirty secret

about the American healthcare system.

If you don't have health insurance

and you get something like cancer,

they don't just say, "Fuck you," and let you die.

But, to get treatment,

you have to spend all the money you have,

prove you are completely broke,

and then you can be part of a clinic.

That's really where medical students practice,

doctors try out new techniques,

and the hospital picks up

the tab in the name of research.

Don't get me wrong. Clinics save lives.

They're just a little messier.

We did not have health insurance.

So, by the time we had completed all the tests,

done the surgery,

followed up with the results, and begun treatment,

a month had passed and every dollar we had was gone.

Certifiably broke, my husband could now join the clinic.

Treatment proved unsuccessful.

So, in the end,

he quit the clinic and just stayed home with us.

He knew when the war was won

and he wanted to go down relaxed.

With dignity.

Not scrambling for a few more days.

Or even hours.

[birds chirping]

[rock music *]

Lulu?

What do you think you're gonna be when you're older?

I think I want to be a professional athlete

and play something like soccer and football.

And I want to be a fashion designer.

Make some clothes. You?

I wanna work in a restaurant.

You know what I like about this trip?

That we're always together.

And that means that we're best friends.

Hey, Lulu. Whatcha thinkin' about?

My friends.

But aren't you having fun with me?

Yeah.

But we're best friends, aren't we?

We are. Don't worry.

[sighs]

- Wanna go home? - Yeah.

I mean, like, to the RV. Not home, home.

Oh. Okay.

[Zelda, narrating] The thing I like best about my mom is,

she's not really like, my mom.

She's like my best friend.

Well, Lulu's my best friend, too.

But Mom does everything with us.

It's like she's just a big kid.

Hey. Miss me?

Nah. [giggles]

Are you ready for Halloween?

[evil laugh]

[fire pops]

Where's Zee?

- Biking. - Why don't you go, too?

Nah.

Listen, I'm gonna make you guys

dinner and then we're gonna have...

... a fun Halloween.

[insects chirping]

- How's the soup? - Good.

Mom? When are we going?

- Where? - Trick-or-treating?

Lu, it's a camping trip.

You know, we're just...

... Having fun. - Yeah.

Are you, fucking kidding me? This isn't fun.

This is bullshit.

I didn't even want to do this trip.

I like it.

How can I help you have fun?

I just want to go home and be with my friends.

I know you want to be with your friends.

What do you want me to do about it?

[feebly] Take me there.

You're doing the fucking trip!

[soft rock music *]

**

[seagulls squawking]

[Zelda] Mom looks lonely.

Lulu? Why are you so mad at Mom?

[Lulu] Well...

...Mom's bein' an asshole.

It seems more like

you're bein' an asshole.

Mom's the one being an asshole.

It seems like you're both being assholes.

No, I'm not, Zelda. She's being mean to us.

What do you mean?

- It's hard to explain. - Why?

Zelda, this isn't a fun trip.

You don't even know why we're gonna go live with Grandma.

We're not gonna stay there, we're just gonna see her.

You know what, Zelda, just...

I'll just be nice to Mom.

[pulsing drums *]

[panting]

[gasp] [panting continues]

**

[Zelda, distant] Mom?

[drums stop]

I'm hungry.

[rock music *]

**

[Toby, narrating] When my lover died,

I felt broken.

Unfortunately, we were also broke.

I considered selling

Harvey but I wasn't ready to let that dream go.

So when I got to banging around ideas

of how I could put bread on the table

and still be a full-throttle mom,

I figured I had these things going for me: a house,

lots of land, and a way with seeds.

So, I tried my hand at farming.

The easy stuff, you know?

Like herbs, heirloom squashes,

fancy artichokes.

Things I figured would give a bang for their buck.

Bust is more like it.

That first year,

I made a net $3,000 on my artisanal produce.

Meanwhile, high up on the mountain,

I was visiting my pot plants daily.

My pot plants were fat. They were tall and prolific.

Like a beacon, smiling through the fog,

their message was loud and clear.

[gas pump dings]

It wasn't hard to turn five plants into ten.

Then ten plants into thirty.

I just wanted to make...enough.

The first year, that number was 20,000 bucks.

The next, 50. The next, twice that.

And the best part?

All my work was done

long before the kids got home.

It should have been more than enough.

Hi. This is Toby...

[annoyed sigh] Hi.

This is Toby for Bob Johnson, please.

[whispers] Thanks.

Bob. Hey. How you doin'?

Good. Yep.

I'm great. Uh-huh.

Still on the road with the kids.

[soft chuckle] Yeah.

So, you got any news? Yeah?

So they're still really gonna come down hard on me, huh?

Okay.

Court date's still the same?

Yeah, I know.

Okay, so, you gotta reach me,

you know to call my mom, right?

Okay. Thanks, Bob.

You too. Bye.

- So? - Let's go.

- What happened? - Nothin'.

- You're so full of shit! - Don't worry about it.

Don't worry about what?

[both] Nothing.

Can we talk about this later?

That's what you always say.

Why couldn't you just bring a cell phone?

'Cause I don't want anyone buggin' me.

I just wanna be able to go away with you guys

and be alone and hang out

and talk and not get interrupted.

Fine. Talk.

I won't interrupt.

Lu, what do you want her to say?

We always talk about fun stuff.

Thank you.

I don't get why you keep smoking pot.

- What's pot? - Nothin'.

Lulu.

I don't do it anymore. I quit.

- Really? - Yeah, I stopped.

Thanks.

[Lulu, narrating] Sometimes, getting my mom to talk

is like pulling weeds out of the dirt.

No pun intended.

I mean, if you ask her something,

she'll tell you everything.

Sometimes more than you asked for.

But the rest of the time she's like a stone.

And stones don't talk.

I don't know if it's 'cause

stuff hurts too much

and she doesn't wanna cry or something.

I don't mean to complain. She's a really good mom.

But I hate not knowing.

I guess I'm also afraid to ask some stuff, too.

[Zelda] Ten, nine, eight,

seven, six, five, four, three, two, one!

Ready or not, here I come!

[Toby, narrating] Playing hide 'n seek

with law enforcement

is not a fun game.

It's a 24-hour...

... 365-day...

... and night...job.

It's not so much the ability to grow marijuana

as it is the ability to hide

marijuana that earns the big bucks.

And the game never stops.

While you're sleeping,

they're creeping.

When you're talking, they're stalking.

Fear and dread sink in.

Weighing more...

... and more...

... the deeper they fall.

Staying out of prison

becomes it's own prison.

The day I was arrested,

I never saw it coming.

My knees buckled when they knocked on my door.

For all the freedom the growers life gave me,

it could never compare

to the freedom they took away.

The game was over.

You know what I like thinkin' about?

All the Indians that used to live here.

Under the same sky...

...with the same rocks.

Who's the most famous Indian?

Oh.

You know who was from around here?

Geronimo. Last Apache warrior.

What happened to him?

He fought this long,

beautiful fight and then in the end, he surrendered.

Why did he surrender?

Well, sometimes, I think

people just have to accept the inevitable.

What's the in-evitable?

Oh, that's when you can't change the future.

Why don't you change the inevitable, then?

[sighs]

[somber music *]

[Zelda, narrating] I still sleep with my mom.

Lulu says it's 'cause I'm a chicken shit.

But I'm not. Lulu's a chicken shit.

I like when she draws pictures on my back.

And she's warm.

- Is Zel asleep? - Yeah, she's sleepin'.

I'm havin' so much fun with you on this trip, Lu.

Thanks. Mom?

How old were you when you lost your virginity?

- Sixteen. - What was his name?

Jimmy DiMago.

[chuckles] Did you get crabs?

No.

- What are crabs? [chuckles]

It's little bugs that live in your pubic hair.

I don't think I ever wanna have sex.

Oh, yeah, you do.

Look, you're not gonna get crabs, Lu.

You just--You know, you wanna have it

with someone that you really trust and...

...someone that you really love.

Like Dad?

Yeah. Like Dad.

[distant train horn]

[Toby, narrating] I used to say my husband

smelled like the desert.

Kinda like, root beer, dirt and moonlight.

Before we had kids, we came out this way a lot.

We never did go to all those tropical spots

people like to go to.

Maybe we meant to but the desert never gets tired.

It just gets better like rust on old cars.

Besides, it doesn't cost a thing to live out here.

Under a big, fat sky and the canyons.

Keeping company with no one

but the coyotes, the lizards, and the quiet.

[Zelda, narrating] I don't know what we're doing out here.

I guess it's fun.

I lifted a rock and saw a scorpion.

And then I saw a baby tarantula, too.

It was fuzzy and cute and I wanted to keep it.

Lulu said if it bit me, I'd die a painful death.

I guess I'll keep asking for a dog.

Seems like we haven't seen anybody in a while.

Yep.

When do you think we are going home?

We'll be home pretty soon, babe.

Don't worry.

[rock music *]

**

[music fades out]

[Lulu] Mom!

[clears throat]

Feelin' better?

[bird cries]

You gotta talk to Zelda.

She doesn't know anything.

[crow caws]

[both birds call]

How long are you gonna be gone?

[sighs]

I could be gone for ten years.

I'll be 20 by then. Even older.

I love you.

Your breath smells like a campfire.

[laughs] Sorry. It's alright.

[Toby laughs]

- Hi, Zel. - Hi.

Can I talk to you for a sec?

Uh, yeah. Sure.

- Nice. - Oh, thanks.

So, Zel. Do you know what's goin' on?

Yeah. You need a nose.

- How's that? - Kinda cool.

I gotta talk to you about why

you gotta go live with Grandma.

Okay?

Once I give you a new nose. That nose sucks.

Uh... - How is that?

Better? - [chuckles] Yeah.

I got in a lot of trouble.

What kind of trouble?

- I broke the law. - What kind of law?

I grew something I wasn't supposed to grow.

Like flowers?

Yeah. Like, a lot of flowers.

What do they look like?

Red, purple, green,

and sometimes they get real sparkly like diamonds.

- Ooh. - Yeah.

How can it be against the law to grow flowers?

- It...just...is. - That's a stupid law.

Yeah, well, I shouldn't have done it.

Or at least gotten busted for it.

That sucks. You must have worked hard on those flowers.

Yeah, I did.

But now I gotta pay the price.

I got some money you can have.

Hey, Zee, I'm not gonna take your money.

Mom, I know where you're going.

Lulu told me.

Oops.

You know what, Mom? You need a mustache.

Now you look like a real criminal.

[laughs]

Nose fight.

[both laugh]

I love you, Mom. - I love you too, babe.

[laughs]

[soft rock music *]

[Toby, narrating] I always know when it's gonna rain.

I can wake up, sniff the air,

and know how many inches have dropped over night.

I can tell you how thirsty the deer are in the grow,

how pissed off the rodents are,

and when it's gonna rain again.

I know every drop on every fuzzy leaf.

What I don't know is how many skips it takes

for me to skim a stone across the Rio Grande,

or how swift the river flow is,

or how many steps it takes for a mom,

two kids, and a duffle bag to get to the other side.

And once across, how far to the nearest town?

How much for a ride to Baja? How much for a new life?

I like Mexico.

The food, the people, dusty land.

Don't get me wrong, I love America.

But if the government takes our house,

how do I tell the kids that?

If you take that away,

well, suddenly Mexico might not sound so bad.

Or maybe Canada. Ooh.

New Zealand. Yeah.

That sounds nice. Romantic.

Aw, who am I kiddin'? I don't even speak Spanish.

Mexico's a tortilla's width away

but it's gonna stay that way.

The only thing that's goin' to Mexico

is the stone I skip across the Rio.

If it even makes it there. Stones aren't real flat here.

And I'm out of practice.

[sad music *]

[wind howls]

[Zelda] D? [Toby] Nope.

Now you got an arm.

Do you think you know what it is, Lulu?

[Lulu] Um...is it, B?

E?

[Lulu] B?

Oh! I get it!

It's rumble strips.

- Bingo. [chuckles]

What are rumble strips?

They're those bumpy things on the side of the road

that rattle the car and make

that loud "kajunk, kajunk, kajunk."

Why do they make that sound?

Well, they're there to make you pay attention.

So, if you're drivin' off the road,

they make that noise so you pay attention,

you get back on the road, and you don't crash.

Why do you always go on them?

I just like the sound of them.

And they kind of feel good. [laughs]

Isn't that dangerous?

No, I'm just drivin' on the edge.

I'm not gonna crash.

Let's do a fashion show.

[hard rock music *]

[drumming *]

[drums stop]

What's wrong? [drumming *]

[drums stop]

The battery's dead.

[drumming *]

[drums stop]

What does that mean?

You got your sneakers on?

Okay.

[castanets clicking *]

[castanets stop]

[footsteps]

[castanets clicking swiftly *]

[castanets stop]

[crow caws]

[castanets clicking swiftly *]

[castanets stop] [wind howls]

[wind chimes]

[distant distorted scream]

[ambience *]

[Lulu, narrating] When people want something too badly,

they do stupid things.

My mom calls it the jinx theory.

You want to make something happen so desperately,

it becomes too important and you fuck it up.

She should know. She's like the queen of it.

It used to happen all the time with her and my dad.

She makes this big deal out of having a date night,

getting me to sleep over at friends' houses,

then she'd cook a big meal, light candles,

shave her bikini line and, of course,

this would be the night that Dad had to work late

or caught a cold or the moon was full

and the swell was just perfect for a moonlight surf.

Yep. Mom never failed to jinx herself.

Well, now she's doing it to us.

It was her idea to go on this trip

so we could bond and live out her dream.

And just like her theory goes,

when you want something too bad, shit starts to go wrong.

[pulsing music *]

[music dies down]

Are you married?

Nope.

Why do you got a wedding ring on?

To remind myself never to get married again.

Hey, where do you want me to put the battery?

Put it in the trunk.

[car radio playing rock music *]

So, where you from?

I'm from the East Coast but I live in El Paso now.

I moved there about a year ago.

- What do you do? - I'm self-employed.

How 'bout you?

These kids don't go to school?

Yeah, I homeschool them.

Why's that?

Well, I've been convicted of a crime

and I'm getting sentenced in two weeks.

- What crime? - Growin' weed.

[scoffs] How much?

A lot.

So, what's your lawyer tell you you're looking at?

Probably between two and ten years.

Fuck.

And so, what happens to them?

Well, they're gonna go live with my mom.

She's nice.

[Zelda] Mom? Can we sleep in the tent tonight?

[Toby] I don't know. - Come on.

Let's-let's talk about it in the RV.

There's no lights in the RV, anyway.

I don't know, Zel.

Let's just...Let's talk about it in the RV.

[Lulu] Come on, Mom. That'd be fun.

Can we do that? - Uh, okay.

Yes. Fine.

[Zelda] Thanks, Mom. - Yeah.

[shifts car to park]

[Zelda] Thanks, mister.

[car doors open]

[Lulu] Thanks for the ride.

[car door closes, car bell dings]

G'night.

[car door opens, closes]

[car door closes]

[trunk opens and closes]

Thank you so much.

Can I give you some money for gas?

No, let me put the battery in the RV.

Oh, no, no. I got that.

But let me give you some money.

- No, I want to. - Oh, no, no, no.

I'm gonna do it in the morning.

Okay, thanks.

[slapping hands]

[giggling]

[water sloshing] [knocking on the door]

I'm coming, Lu.

[knocking]

Lu, just come in.

[door opening]

Hey.

- Fuck. - Hey, sorry.

I was just, uh...

...I just wanted to make sure you guys were okay, you know?

Oh, yeah, we're good, thanks.

Oh, that's good. I'm glad.

You know, I just started thinkin',

I was like, I should have put

the fuckin' battery in there and I feel bad.

[sighing] Aw.

- We got it. - Oh, you put it in?

- Yeah. - Oh, I thought you were going to do that tomorrow.

Smells good in here. I checked 'em, they're fine.

They're totally out.

Nice tent, too. Yeah, they're totally bushed.

Think I could get a little bit of food?

- Oh, yeah. - Thank you.

I mean, I'm just--I'm sorry. It's--I just, you know...

Oh, no, no, no. I'll make you somethin' for the road.

- Thanks. - Um...You like, uh...

... peanut butter?

I like peanut butter and jelly, yeah.

I love peanut butter and jelly.

I can make you a peanut butter sandwich.

[rustling]

Okay.

I'll take a peanut butter sandwich.

Nice RV. - Thanks.

- How long you had this? - Uh, five years.

Did you buy this with your drug money?

Oh, sorry, yeah, bad-bad one.

Sorry.

All right.

Well, I'll give you this to go.

And thank you, again.

You know, it's my pleasure. I was thinking, man, uh...

... Oh, thank you so much. You're awesome.

Mmm, that's not bad. A little dry, but...

... Fuck. I need a rock right now.

Hey, got any beer? - No, sorry.

How 'bout some of that weed you grow?

You got any of that?

That was a long ride, wasn't it?

Yeah.

[clears throat]

Nice. Looks like shake.

What happened to the buds?

Guess I smoked 'em.

That's the thing I keep thinkin' about, too.

You're all the way out here with your kids.

I knew you had this on you. I could tell.

It's probably half the reason your...

... family got stuck out here.

Can you just make sure you smoke it outside, please?

Uhhh, you got rules. I like rules.

I'm glad you got some rules.

But...this isn't for me, it's for you.

I don't smoke pot.

Here. Come on, it's a good one.

I can roll some good joints. I used to smoke.

Take it. - Come on.

Come on?

You think I hooked you guys up today?

Oh, yeah, you hooked us up. Thanks.

You're welcome.

What would you have done if I hadn't come along?

I don't think so many people drive that road.

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, we got lucky.

No problem.

I'm glad I met you guys and could help you out.

Your daughter tell you I was married once?

- No. - I was.

If you got no beer, you got any water?

- Yeah, sorry. - Thank you.

That's a dry sandwich.

You think that's a good roll? - Yeah.

Thanks.

[smacking lips, slurping drink]

Do you think maybe I could stay here tonight?

Oh, no.

Uh, I'm sorry,

but, uh, that would just be a little weird for my kids.

- No, I'll leave before they're up. - No, no, no.

No, that--I'm--I can't do that.

That's...That'd freak them out. - Come on, don't worry.

- No, sorry. - You're-you're sexy.

You are.

- Thanks. - No, I'm--Yeah.

Do I...? - No, I don't--thank you.

- Yeah, you're sexy. - But I can't do that.

That's just too strange. - Yeah, but I mean, come on.

Why not? I-I--Okay, I'm sorry.

I'm not trying to be rude.

But it'd be a lot more fun if you'd say yes.

You know? You know what I mean?

You're going to prison. What's the big deal?

Your kids are sleepin',

we're in the middle of nowhere.

I would if I could but I can't, so--

No, you--okay.

Now-Now, you're makin' me embarrassed.

Like I'm some kind of fuckin' fruitcake...

- ... No, no, no... - ... or something like that.

Yeah! - No, you don't need to be embarrassed.

I just, you know, I got kids.

I'm wrecked from, like, almost 24 hours...

- ...Maybe you need to smoke that and relax. - ... walking in...

- No, thanks. - Yeah, go ahead.

Why don't I give you somethin'...

... you know, else to take with you on the road.

And I'll thank you again. - Here, smoke that and chill out.

Here.

I could give you, uh, some cookies...

- Cookies. - And, uh...

Yeah, you're gonna give me cookies.

Okay, I'll take cookies. I like cookies.

How 'bout some milk with those cookies?

- Come on. - "Come on" what?

No, you come on. Seriously.

Okay. Just say yes.

I'll be good to you.

You know what I'm saying?

You sure those kids are sleepin'?

- Yeah, I checked 'em. - You positive?

Absolutely.

Then, you're on. Sounds good to me.

Will you just let me do one thing, though?

- Yeah! - I'm kind of sweaty and gross, is that okay?

Can I just put on something pretty?

- Are you serious? - Are you serious?

Yes, I sure am. You're hot.

[chuckling]

We're gonna have fun. I'm glad you said yes.

'Cause it wouldn't have been fun if you didn't. - Yeah.

Let's do that.

[exhaling] All right.

[cocking gun] Time to go.

- Hey, come on. - Sit down.

- Hey, come on. - No, you fuckin' come on.

Where's your car?

It's up the road.

You got your keys in your pants?

- Of course, I fuckin' do. - Take your boots off.

- No, fuck you. - Fuck you!

Take your fuckin' boots off

or I'll blow you're fuckin' head off.

Don't look at me.

Take off your pants.

You remember where you picked us up?

- Yeah. - That's where you're gonna find your keys.

You're gonna walk out of the RV and you're gonna go straight.

If you look left or you look right,

I will shoot your fuckin' head off.

Now get the fuck out of here.

Go!

**

[door opening] Keep walkin' asshole.

Mom.

Lulu. Where's Zelda?

She's right here.

Get in!

[shouting breathlessly] Oh, my God!

We--He came into our tent, and we thought

he was going to kill us so we pretended to be asleep.

And then, he left and went into the RV,

and we didn't know what he was going to do.

We thought he was going to kill you!

And then we came up here in the front

and we watched him and he-- you gave him a sandwich!

And when you gave him a sandwich,

then you kissed him!

And he started taking off his pants and we're like,

why the hell is he takin' off his pants?

And then you went out

into the room and then you

came back and took out a gun.

And we didn't even know you had a gun!

I mean, why do we even have a gun?

When-when did you get a gun?

So we were all surprised

that you had a gun but we were just so...

... We didn't know what to do

because he--we thought you-- he was gonna kill you.

We were getting ready to run into the desert,

and we were like, "holy shit,"

I mean, what are we going to do?

And so--Oh, my God! It was really crazy!

And I know he's a fucking creep.

Oh, my God! He scared the shit out of us!

[panting] Huh!

Why was he taking off his pants?

He was all naked!

And then, he left in his underwear

and we didn't know what was happening.

And it was fuckin' awesome!

[laughing]

You totally kicked ass, Mom!

[Toby, narrating] I know the rules.

I fly under the radar of enforcement.

I don't hear a helicopter and think, oh, neat.

I sweat.

But that's not how I got busted.

The folks I've been sharing

with for years were old, trusted friends.

More than happy to pay

at wholesale for what could make them a fat, easy buck.

And never once sold on the street.

By my fourth year as a grower,

and more importantly, a seller,

I'd 30 plants.

Several mature ones

were producing more top-grade bud

than I could ever have imagined.

I was back in the green, so to speak.

And lovin' the lifestyle. I'd found a rhythm.

But comfort is deceptive. I should know that.

Even the hush and swoon of smokin' weed turns on you.

You always want more. One joint isn't enough.

One plant isn't enough.

Even years of laughter,

loyalty, and morning carpool isn't enough.

But, when faced with jail time,

forfeiture of property, and the loss of the most

precious thing you could ever cultivate and love, kids.

Informing on your friend and supplier is enough.

That's how I went down. And you know what?

I don't even blame them. Not for one, eternal second.

**

We drove through the night and in the morning.

It was a beautiful sunrise.

Even though every mile

brought us closer to the inevitable,

it was a ride we were all ready to take.

Zelda, Lulu, and Toby.

Harvey sounded great on the open road.

**

[Lulu speaking on the phone] Hey, Mom. [Toby] Hey.

I scored a bunch of goals this weekend.

You should have seen them. They were rockin' goals.

No way, that's so cool.

Grandma said it was the best game I ever played.

That's awesome. Where's Zee?

[Zelda] Hey, Mom, I'm right here.

Oh, there you are. How's my girl?

Lulu's got a boyfriend. His name is Philip.

[Lulu] No, I don't have a boyfriend named Philip.

I have a boyfriend named Stephen.

[chuckling] Philip was a big asshole. [Toby chuckling]

- I lost a tooth. [Toby] That is so cool.

[Lulu] We're going to come see you next Thursday.

- Oh, I can't wait. - You're right.

Grandma's food sucks.

She can't even make hamburgers right.

I told you. She sucked at cookin' when I was a kid, too.

Where do you think I got it from? [Lulu giggling]

[Zelda] Are you being good? [Toby] Yup.

I'm being good.

Do you want Grandma and me

to bake you something for next Thursday?

- Okay. [Lulu] We miss you.

[Zelda] Bye, Mom. [Toby] Yeah, I love you.

See you next Thursday. I love you.

- Love you, too. [Lulu] Okay.

Bye, Mom. I love you.

Bye.

**