All language subtitles for Parks and Recreation (2009) - S03E12 - Eagleton (1080p BluRay x265 Silence)

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,402 --> 00:00:04,336 Good morning, Ron. Morning. 2 00:00:06,473 --> 00:00:09,203 I know how much you enjoy paperwork, but don't hover. 3 00:00:09,409 --> 00:00:11,001 Nice bench. Is that new? 4 00:00:11,144 --> 00:00:13,408 No, that's been there since the '90s. 5 00:00:13,546 --> 00:00:15,207 What are you doing for your birthday on Friday? 6 00:00:15,281 --> 00:00:17,078 Nothing. I never... 7 00:00:17,784 --> 00:00:19,012 Aha! 8 00:00:19,085 --> 00:00:20,109 Oh, God. 9 00:00:20,186 --> 00:00:21,881 Birthday, birthday, birthday 10 00:00:21,955 --> 00:00:23,889 It's your birthday 11 00:00:23,957 --> 00:00:25,822 It's your birthday, and I know when it is 12 00:00:25,892 --> 00:00:28,918 Ron refuses to tell anyone when his birthday is. 13 00:00:28,995 --> 00:00:32,260 He's even had it redacted on all government documents. 14 00:00:32,332 --> 00:00:35,096 Three years of investigations, phone calls, 15 00:00:35,168 --> 00:00:38,399 Freedom of Information Act requests, and still, I had nothing, 16 00:00:38,471 --> 00:00:43,738 until a well-placed bribe to a gentleman at Baskin-Robbins revealed 17 00:00:44,944 --> 00:00:46,844 Ron's birthday is on Friday. 18 00:00:46,913 --> 00:00:48,710 Damn it. I was so careful. 19 00:00:48,782 --> 00:00:49,840 Well, you blew it. 20 00:00:49,916 --> 00:00:52,111 All for a free scoop of Rum Raisin. 21 00:00:52,185 --> 00:00:54,483 Was it worth it, Ron? Was it? 22 00:00:54,554 --> 00:00:56,681 I command you to do nothing. 23 00:00:56,756 --> 00:00:58,383 I'm not gonna do nothing. I'm gonna do something. 24 00:00:58,458 --> 00:00:59,618 And it's gonna be really big. 25 00:00:59,692 --> 00:01:02,126 I have a lot of years to make up for. 26 00:01:02,195 --> 00:01:05,358 I don't like loud noises and people making a fuss, 27 00:01:05,432 --> 00:01:07,992 and I especially don't like people celebrating 28 00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:12,027 because they know a piece of private information about me. 29 00:01:12,238 --> 00:01:14,297 Plus, the whole thing is a scam. 30 00:01:14,374 --> 00:01:18,105 Birthdays were invented by Hallmark to sell cards. 31 00:01:39,432 --> 00:01:40,797 They put up a fence. 32 00:01:41,401 --> 00:01:42,527 Who? 33 00:01:42,869 --> 00:01:44,393 No! What's that? 34 00:01:44,471 --> 00:01:47,497 There's a small park on the line between Pawnee and Eagleton, and... 35 00:01:47,574 --> 00:01:50,873 Last night Eagleton put up a fence around their side 36 00:01:50,944 --> 00:01:53,811 to keep us disgusting Pawnee hobos off their precious land. 37 00:01:54,247 --> 00:01:57,546 There's even a security guard. You got to show Eagleton I.D. to get in. 38 00:01:57,617 --> 00:01:59,585 Eagleton is a bunch of rich snobs. 39 00:01:59,652 --> 00:02:01,813 And that's coming from someone who has a Mercedes. 40 00:02:01,888 --> 00:02:04,823 With a Harman Kardon Logic 7 surround-sound system. 41 00:02:04,891 --> 00:02:07,086 Who builds a fence to keep kids out of a playground? 42 00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:09,594 Three words, Lindsay Carlisle Shay. 43 00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:13,156 Who? 44 00:02:13,766 --> 00:02:17,031 Lindsay Carlisle Shay and I used to be best friends. 45 00:02:17,103 --> 00:02:19,833 We worked together at the Pawnee Parks Department. 46 00:02:19,906 --> 00:02:21,931 Then she went to work in Eagleton 47 00:02:22,008 --> 00:02:27,844 and "fixed her deviated septum" and lost 35 pounds and lost something else. 48 00:02:27,914 --> 00:02:29,108 What was it again? 49 00:02:29,182 --> 00:02:30,843 Oh, yeah. Her soul. 50 00:02:30,917 --> 00:02:33,886 Is the Eagleton side really that much better than the Pawnee side? 51 00:02:33,953 --> 00:02:35,352 To be fair, yeah. 52 00:02:35,421 --> 00:02:37,514 Our side is this scrappy piece of land 53 00:02:37,590 --> 00:02:40,184 where kids go to smash fluorescent light tubes. 54 00:02:40,260 --> 00:02:41,557 But it has a lot of heart. 55 00:02:41,628 --> 00:02:43,858 That's what people always say when something sucks. 56 00:02:43,930 --> 00:02:45,454 We should stand up for our town, okay? 57 00:02:45,532 --> 00:02:48,194 Pawneeans are just as good as Eagletonians, 58 00:02:48,268 --> 00:02:50,668 although on average, we are several inches shorter 59 00:02:50,737 --> 00:02:52,136 and 80 pounds heavier. 60 00:02:52,205 --> 00:02:54,969 People in Eagleton are straight up mean to us. 61 00:02:55,041 --> 00:02:56,702 I would never set foot over there. 62 00:02:56,776 --> 00:03:00,542 But it's the only place that I can get my Bumble and Bumble hair care products, 63 00:03:00,613 --> 00:03:02,410 so I'm there every eight days. 64 00:03:02,482 --> 00:03:04,916 Okay, well, I am on "Operation No More Fence," 65 00:03:04,984 --> 00:03:08,385 so I'm putting you in charge of "Operation Ron's Party, colon, Shock And Awe." 66 00:03:08,454 --> 00:03:09,648 I am all over it. 67 00:03:09,722 --> 00:03:11,587 I just need you to do what's on that list. 68 00:03:11,658 --> 00:03:14,923 Leslie has a lot of qualities I find horrifying. 69 00:03:15,495 --> 00:03:19,431 But the worst one by far is how thoughtful she can be. 70 00:03:19,499 --> 00:03:20,830 It's the only park in our neighborhood. 71 00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:23,664 I mean, where are my kids supposed to play, the rock quarry? 72 00:03:23,736 --> 00:03:24,862 There's rocks in there. 73 00:03:25,471 --> 00:03:28,599 Why don't we just set fire to the fence? You know, set it ablaze. 74 00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:30,242 That's arson. 75 00:03:30,310 --> 00:03:33,336 Well, let's leave that up to the lawyers. The point is, it would work. 76 00:03:33,413 --> 00:03:36,780 Why don't we build a fence around their fence? 77 00:03:36,849 --> 00:03:40,410 Why? It would give us two fences, 78 00:03:41,087 --> 00:03:44,648 so if they needed to get to their fence for maintenance and whatnot, 79 00:03:44,724 --> 00:03:46,282 their pants might get caught. 80 00:03:46,359 --> 00:03:50,420 My son Joey tried to scale that fence to play on the Eagleton side, 81 00:03:50,496 --> 00:03:52,361 and he fell and hurt his arm. 82 00:03:52,465 --> 00:03:54,626 You need to get those people to tear that fence down. 83 00:03:54,701 --> 00:03:55,861 This woman's right. 84 00:03:55,935 --> 00:03:59,530 I promise you, citizens of Pawnee, 85 00:03:59,606 --> 00:04:01,369 and sweet, brave Joey, 86 00:04:01,441 --> 00:04:03,568 I will tear down that fence. 87 00:04:04,844 --> 00:04:08,041 Okay, I'm just gonna suggest one more time that we burn it down. 88 00:04:08,114 --> 00:04:09,877 But whatever you guys think. 89 00:04:09,949 --> 00:04:11,382 Yeah. Great. 90 00:04:11,451 --> 00:04:12,748 Yes, hi. 91 00:04:12,819 --> 00:04:16,016 I have a question about your inflatable saxophones. 92 00:04:16,756 --> 00:04:18,656 Do those come in different sizes? 93 00:04:18,725 --> 00:04:20,784 I'm gonna need about 40 dozen of those. 94 00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:23,954 Also, what about your neon gangster fedora hats? 95 00:04:25,164 --> 00:04:26,290 That was rude. 96 00:04:26,366 --> 00:04:28,459 Whatever's going on here, stop it immediately. 97 00:04:28,534 --> 00:04:29,626 I was just talking on the phone. 98 00:04:29,702 --> 00:04:31,397 To whom? It was personal. 99 00:04:31,471 --> 00:04:33,701 I would never make a work-related call. You know that. 100 00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:40,011 Lindsay! Leslie Knope. 101 00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:41,137 Hi. Hi. 102 00:04:42,115 --> 00:04:43,412 Has it really been five years? 103 00:04:43,483 --> 00:04:46,418 It has. You look amazing. 104 00:04:46,486 --> 00:04:50,752 Thank you. This place hasn't changed a bit. Still loveable, but grimy. 105 00:04:50,823 --> 00:04:53,986 Hello, there. I'm Ben Wyatt. I'm assistant city manager... 106 00:04:54,060 --> 00:04:55,118 Hi, Dan. 107 00:04:55,762 --> 00:04:57,320 Ben. It's not important. 108 00:04:57,397 --> 00:04:58,557 It won't come up again. 109 00:04:58,631 --> 00:05:01,191 This is Ann. She is my best friend. 110 00:05:01,267 --> 00:05:02,529 Hi. Now. 111 00:05:02,602 --> 00:05:04,866 And she's a nurse, and she works at a hospital. 112 00:05:04,937 --> 00:05:05,926 Oh. 113 00:05:06,072 --> 00:05:09,041 Nice to meet you. I'm sorry. It's just, nursing... 114 00:05:09,108 --> 00:05:11,599 You must be so tired and sad. 115 00:05:11,678 --> 00:05:14,977 It's really nice outside. Shall we speak in my courtyard? 116 00:05:15,048 --> 00:05:16,481 Yeah. 117 00:05:17,417 --> 00:05:19,783 Well, thank you so much for stopping by. 118 00:05:19,852 --> 00:05:21,649 I was passing through Pawnee anyway. 119 00:05:21,721 --> 00:05:23,586 I do a lot of charity work here. 120 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:25,521 There's only so much you can do. 121 00:05:25,591 --> 00:05:29,459 You know, I found a picture of you from back in the day. 122 00:05:30,630 --> 00:05:31,654 Oh. 123 00:05:31,731 --> 00:05:32,959 Look at that. 124 00:05:33,032 --> 00:05:34,465 Let me get a closer look. 125 00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:38,660 So let's talk about Lafayette Park. 126 00:05:38,738 --> 00:05:40,603 Oh, yes. The fence. 127 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:42,872 I'm only trying to protect our children. 128 00:05:42,942 --> 00:05:44,739 Come on, Lindsay, this isn't you. 129 00:05:45,411 --> 00:05:46,673 When we used to work here together, 130 00:05:46,746 --> 00:05:48,839 we loved the fact that parks were for everyone. 131 00:05:48,915 --> 00:05:50,212 That's what makes them so great. 132 00:05:50,283 --> 00:05:51,511 You know what's really great? 133 00:05:51,584 --> 00:05:54,109 A private park that's not for everyone. 134 00:05:54,187 --> 00:05:56,178 Wowsers. What do you care? 135 00:05:56,255 --> 00:05:57,779 It's just a crappy little park. 136 00:05:57,857 --> 00:05:59,347 Well, someone once told me 137 00:05:59,425 --> 00:06:01,450 that there's no such thing as small parks, 138 00:06:01,527 --> 00:06:02,516 just small ideas. 139 00:06:02,595 --> 00:06:03,584 Hmm. 140 00:06:03,696 --> 00:06:05,288 And that someone 141 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:06,889 was this woman. 142 00:06:07,567 --> 00:06:11,094 You can take it if you want. I have many copies and the negatives. 143 00:06:11,170 --> 00:06:12,296 And I have a JPEG. 144 00:06:12,672 --> 00:06:14,435 The fence stays up. 145 00:06:15,007 --> 00:06:16,474 Lindsay, if we... Sweetie, 146 00:06:16,542 --> 00:06:18,237 and I mean this in the nicest possible way, 147 00:06:18,311 --> 00:06:21,144 Pawnee is and always will be a dirty, little nightmare 148 00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,307 from which you will never wake up. 149 00:06:24,650 --> 00:06:25,742 But it was good seeing you. 150 00:06:28,421 --> 00:06:30,651 What? I'm not asleep. I'm awake. 151 00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:33,351 I'm wide awake, and I got my eyes on you. 152 00:06:33,426 --> 00:06:37,328 That's what I would've said if I had thought of it in the moment. 153 00:06:38,097 --> 00:06:39,689 What did I say instead? 154 00:06:42,235 --> 00:06:44,362 Wow! This is where they have their public forums? 155 00:06:44,470 --> 00:06:45,835 Yeah, it's not that great. 156 00:06:45,905 --> 00:06:47,202 They had a valet. 157 00:06:47,273 --> 00:06:49,207 Yes, Eagleton is nicer than Pawnee. 158 00:06:49,275 --> 00:06:52,767 And, yes, because of their cupcake factory, the air always smells like vanilla. 159 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:55,479 Oh, yeah. Wow. 160 00:06:56,315 --> 00:06:58,715 But their people are not inherently better than our people. 161 00:06:58,785 --> 00:07:01,777 The only thing they beat us in is life expectancy, beauty pageants, 162 00:07:01,854 --> 00:07:03,515 and average income. Who cares? 163 00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:04,817 Factoid alert. 164 00:07:04,891 --> 00:07:07,189 Eagleton was founded by former Pawneeans. 165 00:07:07,794 --> 00:07:10,456 Pawnee was established in May of 1817. 166 00:07:10,530 --> 00:07:11,827 And by July, 167 00:07:11,898 --> 00:07:14,526 finding the smell unpleasant and the soil untenable, 168 00:07:14,634 --> 00:07:17,728 all the wealthy people evacuated to Eagleton. 169 00:07:19,305 --> 00:07:20,670 Hello, Pawnee. 170 00:07:21,174 --> 00:07:23,335 Welcome to our public forum. 171 00:07:23,409 --> 00:07:25,570 Hi, I'm Thomas Montgomery Haverford. 172 00:07:25,645 --> 00:07:27,977 Okay. Well, nice outfit. 173 00:07:28,047 --> 00:07:29,480 What, did you just come from the stables? 174 00:07:30,049 --> 00:07:32,643 Yes. I was just at the stables. 175 00:07:32,718 --> 00:07:34,743 You look like you've been working hard. 176 00:07:34,821 --> 00:07:36,686 You have a million fly-aways right now. 177 00:07:36,756 --> 00:07:38,951 Would you like to borrow a mirror or a self-help book? 178 00:07:39,025 --> 00:07:40,014 I would not. 179 00:07:40,092 --> 00:07:42,151 I would like you to get off your high horse, Lindsay. 180 00:07:42,228 --> 00:07:43,422 Pun intended. 181 00:07:43,496 --> 00:07:46,397 You know if I had your job, there would be no fence there. 182 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,991 Well, you don't have my job because you knew you couldn't handle it. 183 00:07:50,169 --> 00:07:51,659 The forum is beginning. 184 00:07:51,737 --> 00:07:53,705 We've got a little bit of Eagleton business, 185 00:07:53,773 --> 00:07:55,798 and then I'll introduce you. Great. 186 00:07:56,342 --> 00:07:57,900 Look how pretty the people are. 187 00:07:58,845 --> 00:08:00,039 Hey, Ron. 188 00:08:00,112 --> 00:08:01,477 How's the street parking at your house? 189 00:08:01,547 --> 00:08:02,536 What? 190 00:08:02,615 --> 00:08:05,584 Can you handle, like, 20 cars or a double-decker party bus? 191 00:08:06,118 --> 00:08:08,746 There is no street parking at my house. 192 00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:10,288 My house is not even on a street. 193 00:08:10,356 --> 00:08:13,792 Do you have space for, like, a huge circus tent? 194 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:18,263 Hey, Ron. Have you seen... What the hell? 195 00:08:18,431 --> 00:08:19,455 No! 196 00:08:20,299 --> 00:08:21,323 Oh! 197 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:24,392 Well, looks like there won't be any balloons for the birthday boy. 198 00:08:24,470 --> 00:08:26,995 These were for a sick child at the hospital. 199 00:08:27,907 --> 00:08:29,169 My office, now. 200 00:08:29,242 --> 00:08:31,403 I don't work for you. Don't care. 201 00:08:32,044 --> 00:08:33,477 Decisions, decisions. 202 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:37,743 I think I'm gonna go with the porcini mushrooms and boursin, s'il vous pla�t. 203 00:08:37,817 --> 00:08:41,685 ...that the Eagleton-Pawnee fence does a lot more harm than it does good. 204 00:08:42,455 --> 00:08:45,549 Hello. I'm Bertram Rolands, a citizen of Eagleton. 205 00:08:48,427 --> 00:08:50,190 With all due respect, Ms. Knope, 206 00:08:50,263 --> 00:08:52,857 can't you just clean up your side of the park, 207 00:08:52,932 --> 00:08:54,092 put some new equipment there? 208 00:08:54,166 --> 00:08:55,394 Well, we would love to do that, 209 00:08:55,468 --> 00:08:58,403 but, unfortunately, money is tight right now. 210 00:08:59,105 --> 00:09:00,504 Hello. I'm Christine Porter. 211 00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:07,179 I want to respectfully say that I'm in favor of the fence. 212 00:09:07,246 --> 00:09:10,147 I see it as a kind of punishment for Pawnee 213 00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:13,413 that might inspire your town to clean up its act. 214 00:09:15,121 --> 00:09:17,112 Well, I would like to respectfully say 215 00:09:17,189 --> 00:09:20,181 that any child should be able to play in any park, 216 00:09:20,259 --> 00:09:22,693 regardless of wealth or status. 217 00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:29,996 Anyway, this is Joey Plunkett. 218 00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:31,764 Joey, wave to the audience. 219 00:09:31,837 --> 00:09:34,533 Oh, you can't, because you broke your arm 220 00:09:34,874 --> 00:09:36,136 climbing that fence. 221 00:09:36,208 --> 00:09:38,540 I can wave with this arm. No, you can't. 222 00:09:39,045 --> 00:09:40,740 Both your arms are broken. 223 00:09:40,813 --> 00:09:42,576 All due respect, I recognize that boy. 224 00:09:42,648 --> 00:09:45,811 He was caught selling fireworks to Eagleton kids. 225 00:09:46,252 --> 00:09:48,311 Well, with more due respect, 226 00:09:48,387 --> 00:09:51,584 a lot of boys do that in our town. You cannot be sure that he is the one. 227 00:09:51,657 --> 00:09:55,024 This is a perfect example of how we're going to help you. 228 00:09:55,094 --> 00:09:57,426 Here's to you, Joey, and your mother 229 00:09:57,496 --> 00:10:01,227 and to every Pawnee citizen who might have a bright future 230 00:10:01,300 --> 00:10:04,394 if they fundamentally change everything about themselves. 231 00:10:05,504 --> 00:10:07,096 Thanks to Leslie Knope. I'm not done. 232 00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:09,368 Isn't she trying her hardest? 233 00:10:11,277 --> 00:10:15,043 So cute and so good. 234 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:17,207 I'm only gonna ask you this once. 235 00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:18,875 What is going on with my birthday? 236 00:10:18,951 --> 00:10:20,976 Oh, my God. Ron, it's your birthday. 237 00:10:21,053 --> 00:10:23,283 Happy Birthday. Shut your damn mouth. 238 00:10:23,356 --> 00:10:24,914 This is a fun conversation. 239 00:10:24,991 --> 00:10:27,016 Just tell me what Leslie is planning. 240 00:10:27,093 --> 00:10:30,085 Honestly, I don't know. I haven't heard anything. 241 00:10:30,162 --> 00:10:32,630 Why don't you tell me what she did for your last birthday? 242 00:10:32,698 --> 00:10:34,598 Oh, well, that was intense. 243 00:10:34,667 --> 00:10:36,191 She totally surprised me. 244 00:10:36,268 --> 00:10:37,735 She kidnapped me from work, 245 00:10:37,803 --> 00:10:39,737 and then she took me to that place, Se�or Vega's, 246 00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:41,432 you know, where the mariachi band comes out. 247 00:10:41,507 --> 00:10:44,442 They put a big sombrero on you, and then everybody sings "Happy Birthday"? 248 00:10:44,510 --> 00:10:45,568 Damn it. 249 00:10:45,645 --> 00:10:46,907 And then we went back to my house, 250 00:10:46,979 --> 00:10:49,607 and she invited basically everyone I knew, 251 00:10:49,682 --> 00:10:52,242 and she had this great guy doing face painting, 252 00:10:52,318 --> 00:10:54,752 and I had my face painted like a fairy tiger. 253 00:10:54,820 --> 00:10:56,048 Ugh. 254 00:10:56,222 --> 00:10:57,917 Also, she did it, like, a week before my birthday, 255 00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:00,481 which is genius, 'cause I had no idea it was coming. 256 00:11:00,559 --> 00:11:02,959 And then there was a bouncy castle. 257 00:11:03,029 --> 00:11:05,190 Did you know they made those for adults? 258 00:11:05,264 --> 00:11:06,253 Mmm-hmm. 259 00:11:06,766 --> 00:11:09,633 Maybe I'll change it up this time. Can I try the andouille sausage? 260 00:11:09,702 --> 00:11:11,499 Tom, let's go. What? No. 261 00:11:12,405 --> 00:11:14,373 Hey, not you too. 262 00:11:15,374 --> 00:11:17,740 It's gross. I don't like it. It's disgusting. 263 00:11:18,911 --> 00:11:20,811 Did you guys get your public forum gift bag? 264 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,472 There's an iPod touch in here. 265 00:11:22,948 --> 00:11:25,712 Man, she used to not be like this. Eagleton really changed her. 266 00:11:25,785 --> 00:11:28,583 Yeah, what exactly happened between the two of you, anyway? 267 00:11:28,654 --> 00:11:31,179 Five years ago, Eagleton offered me that job. 268 00:11:31,257 --> 00:11:33,521 And you said no? Are you insane? 269 00:11:33,592 --> 00:11:35,617 I talked it over with Lindsay, and we made a pact 270 00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:37,720 that we would stay in Pawnee together 271 00:11:38,097 --> 00:11:42,124 and work hard and fight to make Pawnee a better place to live. 272 00:11:42,802 --> 00:11:46,568 And then they offered her the job, and she took it and disappeared. 273 00:11:46,639 --> 00:11:47,663 Wow. 274 00:11:47,740 --> 00:11:50,732 Verbena-scented soy candles! 275 00:11:52,478 --> 00:11:54,207 You want me to do what, now? 276 00:11:54,280 --> 00:11:58,341 Send Leslie somewhere on an assignment, a conference or something, 277 00:11:58,417 --> 00:12:01,511 and make her take April and freeze their bank accounts. 278 00:12:01,620 --> 00:12:04,384 I don't understand. Is Leslie's work unsatisfactory? 279 00:12:04,457 --> 00:12:06,322 No, it has nothing to do with her work. 280 00:12:07,059 --> 00:12:08,549 I don't want to get into it. 281 00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:11,158 Ron, look, this is me, okay? 282 00:12:11,530 --> 00:12:13,555 You know you can talk to me about anything. 283 00:12:13,632 --> 00:12:17,363 Well, it's my birthday on Friday. 284 00:12:17,436 --> 00:12:19,700 Hey! Happy Birthday. 285 00:12:22,942 --> 00:12:26,537 I'm ending this right now. I'm just gonna leave early and go home. 286 00:12:28,047 --> 00:12:29,708 Unless... 287 00:12:29,782 --> 00:12:32,012 That's exactly what she wants me to do. 288 00:12:34,320 --> 00:12:36,652 All right, everybody just grab a bag and open it up 289 00:12:37,056 --> 00:12:39,286 and then try to find some dirty stuff in there. 290 00:12:39,358 --> 00:12:40,382 What are you doing? 291 00:12:40,459 --> 00:12:43,121 Eagleton treats us like garbage. We're gonna treat them like garbage. 292 00:12:43,195 --> 00:12:44,753 We're gonna take these bags of trash, 293 00:12:44,830 --> 00:12:46,559 and we're gonna throw it over to their side of the park. 294 00:12:46,632 --> 00:12:49,658 And then we're just gonna let the stink and the raccoons run wild. 295 00:12:50,136 --> 00:12:52,536 Well, isn't that just playing right into what they think of you? 296 00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:58,171 Oh, my God. What am I thinking? Let's just stop this. 297 00:12:58,644 --> 00:12:59,668 Put everything back in the truck. 298 00:12:59,745 --> 00:13:01,337 Let's back it up. No, no, no, no. 299 00:13:01,413 --> 00:13:03,381 Leslie, you promised we could throw garbage everywhere. 300 00:13:03,783 --> 00:13:04,909 Wow. 301 00:13:04,984 --> 00:13:07,919 I didn't expect to see the whole Parks Department here, 302 00:13:07,987 --> 00:13:11,286 although it is, sadly, one of the nicest spots in town. 303 00:13:11,357 --> 00:13:13,325 I am so sick of this, Lindsay. 304 00:13:13,392 --> 00:13:15,553 Wait, Leslie. I've got this. 305 00:13:16,061 --> 00:13:18,791 You listen to me, Lindsay Carlisle Shay. 306 00:13:18,864 --> 00:13:20,525 Why don't you take your fancy dog, 307 00:13:20,599 --> 00:13:21,930 get in your Escalade, 308 00:13:22,001 --> 00:13:23,866 and if you have any job openings, 309 00:13:23,936 --> 00:13:25,164 maybe you should let me know about 'em. 310 00:13:25,237 --> 00:13:26,864 Come on, man. No! 311 00:13:27,339 --> 00:13:28,772 I'm sick of being treated 312 00:13:28,841 --> 00:13:32,709 like I'm not willing to relocate to Eagleton, because I am! 313 00:13:33,245 --> 00:13:35,577 So here's what you could do, lady. 314 00:13:36,215 --> 00:13:37,705 Take this resume 315 00:13:37,783 --> 00:13:40,684 and shove it into your human resources slot. 316 00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:44,486 Oh, yeah! Shove it there! 317 00:13:44,557 --> 00:13:45,546 No. 318 00:13:45,691 --> 00:13:49,787 You might have a fancy car and a mahogany purse, 319 00:13:49,862 --> 00:13:51,261 or whatever rich people have, 320 00:13:51,330 --> 00:13:53,628 but I remember something that you're trying to forget. 321 00:13:53,699 --> 00:13:55,564 You're a Pawnee girl. 322 00:13:56,068 --> 00:13:58,434 No, Leslie, I'm not. 323 00:13:58,504 --> 00:13:59,869 Well, then why do you come here at dinnertime 324 00:13:59,939 --> 00:14:02,100 and get takeout from the legendary J.J.'s Diner? 325 00:14:02,775 --> 00:14:04,037 It's not for me. 326 00:14:04,376 --> 00:14:07,004 These waffles make great dog laxatives. 327 00:14:07,079 --> 00:14:08,637 Don't you dare 328 00:14:09,381 --> 00:14:11,849 feed that waffle to that dog to get it to poop. 329 00:14:13,586 --> 00:14:14,883 Sambuca need to make? 330 00:14:14,954 --> 00:14:16,285 There you go. 331 00:14:17,056 --> 00:14:18,387 Leslie. How dare you? 332 00:14:18,457 --> 00:14:19,856 No! - Get her, Leslie! 333 00:14:19,925 --> 00:14:21,722 No! 334 00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:25,660 Garbage fight! 335 00:14:25,731 --> 00:14:26,720 Ugh! 26057

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