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00:00:00,999 --> 00:00:04,059
If you look inside your bags,
you will find a few things.
2
00:00:04,399 --> 00:00:07,561
A bouquet of hand-crocheted
flower pens...
3
00:00:07,634 --> 00:00:08,623
Oh!
4
00:00:08,735 --> 00:00:11,295
A mosaic portrait
of each of you
5
00:00:11,371 --> 00:00:14,204
made from the crushed bottles
of your favorite diet soda,
6
00:00:14,274 --> 00:00:16,605
and a personalized
5,000-word essay
7
00:00:16,675 --> 00:00:19,269
of why you are all so awesome.
8
00:00:19,345 --> 00:00:23,440
What's Galentine's Day?
Oh, it's only the best day of the year.
9
00:00:23,515 --> 00:00:26,382
Every February 13th,
my lady friends and I
10
00:00:26,451 --> 00:00:28,282
leave our husbands
and our boyfriends at home
11
00:00:28,328 --> 00:00:30,562
and we just come and
kick it breakfast style.
12
00:00:30,854 --> 00:00:32,705
Ladies celebrating ladies.
13
00:00:32,790 --> 00:00:37,227
It's like Lilith Fair minus the angst.
Plus frittatas.
14
00:00:37,294 --> 00:00:40,889
So to conclude our
Galentine's Day breakfast,
15
00:00:40,964 --> 00:00:43,932
it is time for the greatest
story ever told.
16
00:00:45,001 --> 00:00:46,434
What's the story?
17
00:00:46,502 --> 00:00:48,697
It's the most
romantic story ever.
18
00:00:48,771 --> 00:00:51,864
It makes The Notebook
look like Saw V.
19
00:00:52,808 --> 00:00:54,036
Go, Mom, go.
20
00:00:54,109 --> 00:00:56,907
It was 1968.
I was 18
21
00:00:56,978 --> 00:00:59,208
and our family went
on a vacation to Bermuda.
22
00:00:59,747 --> 00:01:03,114
And on the first day, I went
for a swim in the ocean.
23
00:01:03,951 --> 00:01:07,717
And I got caught
in a very strong current.
24
00:01:08,922 --> 00:01:10,321
You've heard this
story before, right?
25
00:01:10,390 --> 00:01:11,516
Yes, but the drama.
26
00:01:11,591 --> 00:01:13,354
The next thing I felt
27
00:01:13,993 --> 00:01:17,928
were two very powerful arms
28
00:01:18,363 --> 00:01:20,228
whisking me to safety.
29
00:01:20,566 --> 00:01:23,160
And he looked down
at me and he said,
30
00:01:23,936 --> 00:01:25,665
"Are you okay?"
31
00:01:26,105 --> 00:01:29,835
And I looked up at him
and I said, "I am now."
32
00:01:31,075 --> 00:01:33,908
So they sneak out to meet each
other and walk on the beach.
33
00:01:33,978 --> 00:01:35,376
And two weeks later,
he asked her
34
00:01:35,445 --> 00:01:37,936
to marry him and
move to Illinois.
35
00:01:38,014 --> 00:01:40,847
But her parents thought she was
too young, so she said no.
36
00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:43,945
And then they lost touch, and a
few years later she met my dad.
37
00:01:44,020 --> 00:01:45,953
I gotta take one
of those lifeguard courses.
38
00:01:46,021 --> 00:01:47,352
Those guys get all the action.
39
00:01:47,423 --> 00:01:49,357
- Am I right, Justin?
- We gotta find this guy.
40
00:01:49,425 --> 00:01:52,189
Frank? He's probably
married or dead.
41
00:01:52,261 --> 00:01:53,989
What's the difference?
Am I right, Justin?
42
00:01:54,062 --> 00:01:56,189
Well, at least let
me try and find him.
43
00:01:56,289 --> 00:01:58,108
Imagine how much better
that story would be
44
00:01:58,133 --> 00:02:00,471
if we actually reunited them.
45
00:02:01,847 --> 00:02:04,137
I think Justin's right.
You should let him do this.
46
00:02:04,338 --> 00:02:07,171
Okay. Do it.
But if you find him and he's weird,
47
00:02:07,241 --> 00:02:09,232
like a ventriloquist,
or a puppeteer,
48
00:02:09,309 --> 00:02:12,004
or anyone who pretends
toys are people,
49
00:02:12,078 --> 00:02:13,306
then abort the mission.
50
00:02:13,379 --> 00:02:14,573
- Absolutely.
- Absolutely.
51
00:02:37,831 --> 00:02:39,889
You, you're the best
girlfriend ever.
52
00:02:39,966 --> 00:02:40,990
Aw!
53
00:02:41,067 --> 00:02:42,830
Happy Valentine's Day.
54
00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:45,014
I knew, eventually, somehow,
55
00:02:45,071 --> 00:02:47,698
being in a relationship with
you would totally pay off.
56
00:02:47,735 --> 00:02:51,501
I bought him some actual towels.
He was using a bathrobe.
57
00:02:51,573 --> 00:02:55,771
And I bought him some other things
that humans usually use, like shampoo.
58
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:58,072
Troops, gather around.
Great news.
59
00:02:58,145 --> 00:03:00,079
The Senior Center
Valentine's Dance
60
00:03:00,147 --> 00:03:02,012
is tomorrow,
from 5:00 to 9:00.
61
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:06,518
Are we talking a.m. or p.m.?
Those people are old. Am I right, Justin?
62
00:03:07,386 --> 00:03:08,978
Oh! Justin's not here.
63
00:03:09,055 --> 00:03:12,684
It isn't just a job, gang, we're gonna
learn a lot from these seniors.
64
00:03:12,758 --> 00:03:15,988
Some of them have been
married for half a century.
65
00:03:16,628 --> 00:03:19,563
And no offense, but everybody
here is terrible at love.
66
00:03:19,631 --> 00:03:25,500
Divorced, dating a gay guy, divorced
twice, jury's still out on you two.
67
00:03:26,203 --> 00:03:27,431
And Jerry, who knows.
68
00:03:27,504 --> 00:03:29,734
I've been happily
married for 28 years.
69
00:03:29,807 --> 00:03:31,468
You've met my wife,
Gayle, many times.
70
00:03:31,542 --> 00:03:32,565
Whatever.
71
00:03:32,642 --> 00:03:35,372
Finally, Ann and Mark
are our special volunteers,
72
00:03:35,445 --> 00:03:37,413
and they will be
available whenever needed.
73
00:03:37,847 --> 00:03:38,973
I didn't volunteer.
74
00:03:39,048 --> 00:03:40,912
Yeah, too bad.
You got drafted.
75
00:03:40,983 --> 00:03:44,851
Ask not what your old people
could do for you,
76
00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:46,911
ask what you could do
for your old people.
77
00:03:47,689 --> 00:03:48,678
Terminator.
78
00:03:48,757 --> 00:03:49,916
What? No, JFK.
79
00:03:50,725 --> 00:03:53,125
This meeting
has been terminated.
80
00:03:53,194 --> 00:03:54,593
That is the Terminator.
81
00:03:54,662 --> 00:03:55,788
Nice.
82
00:03:56,597 --> 00:03:57,586
Where am I going?
83
00:04:00,433 --> 00:04:01,457
Well, hello there.
84
00:04:01,534 --> 00:04:03,399
Well, hey.
I got your message.
85
00:04:03,470 --> 00:04:04,869
You wanted to talk?
86
00:04:04,938 --> 00:04:05,962
Yes, I do.
87
00:04:06,039 --> 00:04:07,028
Oh.
88
00:04:07,573 --> 00:04:08,904
Have a seat.
89
00:04:10,976 --> 00:04:12,238
- Mmm.
- Some champagne?
90
00:04:12,311 --> 00:04:13,539
Uh, no, thanks.
91
00:04:13,612 --> 00:04:16,546
Come on. This is Armand de Brignac.
Jay-Z drinks this.
92
00:04:16,614 --> 00:04:19,447
Yeah, well, Jay-Z doesn't have
to perform surgery in an hour.
93
00:04:19,517 --> 00:04:22,008
You don't know Jay-Z's schedule.
He's a renaissance man.
94
00:04:22,954 --> 00:04:25,320
Okay, fine.
Well, this is for you.
95
00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:26,378
Oh!
96
00:04:26,923 --> 00:04:28,652
Well, it's almost
Valentine's Day,
97
00:04:28,725 --> 00:04:31,751
so I thought it would be a
good day to tell you that...
98
00:04:31,828 --> 00:04:35,194
Okay. Let me just
stop you right there.
99
00:04:36,799 --> 00:04:38,824
Look, Tommy,
100
00:04:41,137 --> 00:04:45,732
I just want you to know I'm so grateful
for everything you did for me,
101
00:04:46,441 --> 00:04:48,966
but I only see us as friends.
102
00:04:49,044 --> 00:04:53,207
For now. But think about how much
better our friendship would be
103
00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:55,475
if we added doing it.
104
00:04:56,884 --> 00:04:58,749
Seriously, I know
our marriage was fake,
105
00:04:58,819 --> 00:05:00,810
but there's something
between us.
106
00:05:00,888 --> 00:05:03,048
And I think we should
give it a shot, for real.
107
00:05:03,122 --> 00:05:06,751
I just don't feel
that way about you.
108
00:05:08,661 --> 00:05:10,128
I'm sorry.
109
00:05:20,271 --> 00:05:22,068
Each time I do
110
00:05:22,139 --> 00:05:26,940
Just the thought of you
makes me stop before I begin
111
00:05:27,678 --> 00:05:29,372
I've got you
112
00:05:30,714 --> 00:05:32,477
Under my skin
113
00:05:33,116 --> 00:05:34,378
So, there's that one, I guess.
114
00:05:34,451 --> 00:05:36,316
All right. You guys sound
ready for the dance tomorrow.
115
00:05:36,386 --> 00:05:38,979
I don't know about these
old fogy songs, Leslie.
116
00:05:39,054 --> 00:05:40,612
Why can't we just
do our originals?
117
00:05:40,689 --> 00:05:42,714
I just wrote a new song, okay?
118
00:05:42,791 --> 00:05:45,055
Bottom line,
it's called Sex Hair.
119
00:05:45,127 --> 00:05:46,957
It's about how you can tell
when someone's just had sex
120
00:05:47,028 --> 00:05:49,724
'cause of how their hair gets matted
up in the back. It's awesome.
121
00:05:51,099 --> 00:05:53,363
Think of it this way.
These songs are exactly
122
00:05:53,434 --> 00:05:55,526
like the songs
you usually play,
123
00:05:55,602 --> 00:05:57,729
except instead of modern rock,
124
00:05:57,804 --> 00:05:59,863
they're old jazzy
standards from the '40s.
125
00:06:02,476 --> 00:06:04,204
Okay, yeah. You got a point.
126
00:06:04,276 --> 00:06:05,937
Yeah.
You're gonna do great.
127
00:06:06,379 --> 00:06:08,244
All right, guys.
128
00:06:08,314 --> 00:06:10,111
Andy, I've been here
for half an hour.
129
00:06:10,182 --> 00:06:11,342
Can I get my shoes shined?
130
00:06:11,417 --> 00:06:14,908
Kyle, I'm gonna lose my on
you if you ask me one more time.
131
00:06:16,454 --> 00:06:17,716
Found him.
132
00:06:18,757 --> 00:06:21,692
Frank Beckerson, 63.
133
00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:25,388
Lives in a little town
called Bridgeport, Illinois.
134
00:06:25,462 --> 00:06:28,989
Divorced, no kids, worked as
a lifeguard when he was 20.
135
00:06:30,801 --> 00:06:34,429
Ron, I need a half a day off
for a secret mission of love.
136
00:06:35,271 --> 00:06:37,501
You're asking my permission
to take a nooner?
137
00:06:37,573 --> 00:06:39,564
Sure. Well,
I don't know. Maybe.
138
00:06:39,642 --> 00:06:42,474
Justin and I need to go on a
romantically-inspired road trip.
139
00:06:42,544 --> 00:06:43,909
So it is a nooner?
140
00:06:43,979 --> 00:06:46,777
Well, we're planning to leave around
noon, so I'm not quite sure...
141
00:06:46,848 --> 00:06:48,406
That's... No, Leslie,
that is not a nooner.
142
00:06:48,483 --> 00:06:50,382
I tracked down this old
flame of Leslie's mom.
143
00:06:50,419 --> 00:06:54,075
We're gonna go pick him up. We're gonna
reunite them on Valentine's Day.
144
00:06:54,200 --> 00:06:56,207
Is that a great story or what?
145
00:06:56,306 --> 00:06:58,170
Yeah, great story indeed.
146
00:06:58,203 --> 00:06:59,459
Enjoy your half day off.
147
00:06:59,779 --> 00:07:00,547
Thank you.
148
00:07:00,593 --> 00:07:01,617
Pick you up
tomorrow around noon.
149
00:07:01,643 --> 00:07:04,271
For our nooner.
Which is a cute word.
150
00:07:04,397 --> 00:07:05,796
Explain it to her later.
151
00:07:06,258 --> 00:07:07,247
Explain what?
152
00:07:07,699 --> 00:07:09,860
Happy Valentine's Day.
153
00:07:09,866 --> 00:07:14,530
First off, a bear in a paper bag
and a heart-shaped balloon.
154
00:07:14,673 --> 00:07:16,640
I love bears in bags.
155
00:07:16,941 --> 00:07:18,568
Well, you will like this, then.
156
00:07:18,643 --> 00:07:22,704
Because this is a giant teddy
bear holding a red heart.
157
00:07:23,548 --> 00:07:25,947
Aw! Festive. What's this?
Oh, I don't know.
158
00:07:26,016 --> 00:07:28,348
It's a heart-shaped
box of chocolates.
159
00:07:28,418 --> 00:07:31,615
That's a dozen red roses in
a heart-shaped arrangement.
160
00:07:31,688 --> 00:07:35,953
- See that? Perfume. For the lady.
- Yeah. Ooh! Ooh!
161
00:07:36,025 --> 00:07:38,550
"Yearning, by
Dennis Feinstein."
162
00:07:39,128 --> 00:07:43,215
Mmm. Ooh!
Dennis. No, no, Dennis.
163
00:07:43,241 --> 00:07:46,184
Finally,
The Heart of the Ocean.
164
00:07:46,664 --> 00:07:48,248
Gorgeous.
165
00:07:50,805 --> 00:07:55,138
I never had a chance to get a girl a
clich๏ฟฝd Valentine's Day gift before.
166
00:07:55,209 --> 00:07:57,507
So I got you all of them.
167
00:08:00,147 --> 00:08:01,841
Thank you.
That was very sweet.
168
00:08:02,448 --> 00:08:03,745
Do you think
they'll get married?
169
00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:05,443
Oh, my God,
what if they get married?
170
00:08:05,518 --> 00:08:06,967
That would be amazing.
171
00:08:07,205 --> 00:08:08,914
Would I call him "Dad" then?
172
00:08:08,988 --> 00:08:12,650
- Hmm. Hmm. - No, that'd be too much.
Maybe I'll call him "Pappy."
173
00:08:12,724 --> 00:08:15,158
Pop? Poppy? Paw-Paw?
174
00:08:15,627 --> 00:08:17,254
Look at me.
I'm getting ahead of myself.
175
00:08:17,329 --> 00:08:19,091
Hey. You never know.
176
00:08:20,331 --> 00:08:22,731
I'm gonna call him
"Poo-Paw."
177
00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:25,291
How often do you get
to reunite soul mates?
178
00:08:25,636 --> 00:08:28,536
What if I told you that you
could reunite Romeo and Juliet?
179
00:08:28,605 --> 00:08:31,165
Or Brad Pitt
and Jennifer Aniston?
180
00:08:32,542 --> 00:08:35,204
Oh, Jen. I really
want you to be happy.
181
00:08:37,112 --> 00:08:38,807
Stay away from John Mayer.
182
00:08:40,115 --> 00:08:42,171
I cannot believe I'm gonna
meet Frank Beckerson.
183
00:08:42,208 --> 00:08:44,608
I feel like I've known
him my whole life.
184
00:08:46,621 --> 00:08:47,952
Frank?
185
00:08:48,022 --> 00:08:50,752
My God. Marlene.
186
00:08:50,825 --> 00:08:54,112
Oh, no. Poo-Paw. Poo-Paw, no.
I'm not Marlene.
187
00:08:55,262 --> 00:08:59,130
Oh! So sorry. I should really
wear my glasses. Come on in.
188
00:09:04,122 --> 00:09:05,653
Frank, I was wondering.
189
00:09:05,691 --> 00:09:08,051
My mom always said that
you wanted to be a lawyer.
190
00:09:08,126 --> 00:09:09,150
Did that work out?
191
00:09:09,203 --> 00:09:10,670
No. Never did.
192
00:09:10,739 --> 00:09:13,366
Though I did once
act as my own lawyer.
193
00:09:14,576 --> 00:09:18,444
Oh! I found some old pictures
of Marlene and me. Look.
194
00:09:20,681 --> 00:09:22,148
Look how young she is.
195
00:09:22,216 --> 00:09:23,513
These are amazing.
196
00:09:24,084 --> 00:09:26,416
Probably shouldn't
show you this one.
197
00:09:28,388 --> 00:09:29,820
No, thank you.
198
00:09:30,623 --> 00:09:34,753
Your mom was such a firecracker.
Smart, funny, sharp as a tack.
199
00:09:34,827 --> 00:09:37,091
Such firm breasts.
200
00:09:37,930 --> 00:09:39,191
Oh, that was inappropriate.
201
00:09:41,032 --> 00:09:45,560
Wow. I am just, all of a sudden,
so nervous to see her again.
202
00:09:46,905 --> 00:09:49,338
I'm gonna throw up real quick
and then we can leave.
203
00:09:51,575 --> 00:09:53,236
- Hi.
- Hi.
204
00:09:53,310 --> 00:09:54,800
Valentine's bash
at The Bulge tonight.
205
00:09:54,879 --> 00:09:56,346
We can get you
a drink bracelet.
206
00:09:56,846 --> 00:10:00,612
I can't. I've gotta work at the
Senior Center Valentine's Day Dance thing.
207
00:10:00,683 --> 00:10:02,947
That sounds amazing.
Can we come?
208
00:10:03,586 --> 00:10:05,610
I guess. I don't know
why you would want to.
209
00:10:05,687 --> 00:10:06,813
Because old people are funny.
210
00:10:06,889 --> 00:10:08,584
Yeah, it'll be like
The Golden Girls.
211
00:10:08,657 --> 00:10:10,215
I have to go get ready.
212
00:10:12,961 --> 00:10:15,588
So, Frank, where have you
been for the past 40 years?
213
00:10:15,663 --> 00:10:19,155
Oh! You know, here and there.
You know? Grenada, for a while.
214
00:10:19,233 --> 00:10:22,862
Then Panama, then Afghanistan.
215
00:10:23,104 --> 00:10:25,071
- So you were in the military?
- Nope.
216
00:10:25,472 --> 00:10:28,339
You know, I always wonder how
different my life would've been
217
00:10:28,408 --> 00:10:30,569
if your mother had married me.
218
00:10:31,044 --> 00:10:34,171
It would've been better.
I'll tell you that much.
219
00:10:35,848 --> 00:10:37,816
Frank? Frank, are you okay?
220
00:10:37,883 --> 00:10:39,942
I'm fine. I'm good.
221
00:10:42,153 --> 00:10:45,179
I am just so
nervous to see her.
222
00:10:45,256 --> 00:10:46,814
There is nothing
to be nervous about.
223
00:10:47,425 --> 00:10:49,256
- Have you got a bag or something?
- A what?
224
00:10:49,327 --> 00:10:50,588
- Do you have a bag?
- I have a purse.
225
00:10:50,661 --> 00:10:51,787
Well, give him the purse then.
226
00:10:51,862 --> 00:10:52,886
All right.
227
00:10:59,368 --> 00:11:02,599
You like potato
and I like potahto
228
00:11:03,005 --> 00:11:06,338
You like tomato
and I like tomahto
229
00:11:06,409 --> 00:11:09,900
Potato, potahto Tomato, tomahto
230
00:11:09,978 --> 00:11:12,378
Let's call the whole thing off.
231
00:11:14,582 --> 00:11:15,571
Uh...
232
00:11:15,817 --> 00:11:17,647
I mean, that sucked, didn't it?
233
00:11:17,718 --> 00:11:20,016
Maybe if you sang it
like Louis Armstrong.
234
00:11:20,087 --> 00:11:21,247
Maybe, yeah.
235
00:11:21,889 --> 00:11:24,050
I mean, here's
the thing, though.
236
00:11:24,124 --> 00:11:25,557
Who is that?
237
00:11:26,993 --> 00:11:31,623
My problem is I don't know how
to tell if we're doing good.
238
00:11:31,698 --> 00:11:32,960
Because when you
play a rock show,
239
00:11:33,032 --> 00:11:34,693
it's really easy to know
if you're doing great
240
00:11:34,767 --> 00:11:38,896
because chicks will flash their boobs
at you when you're up onstage.
241
00:11:38,971 --> 00:11:42,202
And you're like,
"Oh! That must've sounded pretty good."
242
00:11:42,274 --> 00:11:46,642
If that happens here, my eyes will
fall out of my head and I'll die.
243
00:11:51,983 --> 00:11:54,246
Frank? Frank, are you okay?
244
00:11:58,822 --> 00:12:00,847
- Maybe we should...
- Yeah. Frank.
245
00:12:01,157 --> 00:12:03,056
- Frank. Frank.
- Frank.
246
00:12:05,227 --> 00:12:08,196
But I can't see anybody but you
247
00:12:10,199 --> 00:12:11,256
Flip flop
248
00:12:11,332 --> 00:12:13,926
You know, I might be crazy, but
I have this weird suspicion
249
00:12:14,002 --> 00:12:15,902
that things are
going well with us.
250
00:12:16,671 --> 00:12:19,538
You know, I have
that same suspicion.
251
00:12:21,241 --> 00:12:23,266
But having never been in
something like this before,
252
00:12:23,343 --> 00:12:26,904
I feel the need to ask,
how am I doing?
253
00:12:27,914 --> 00:12:29,073
Come on.
254
00:12:29,148 --> 00:12:31,878
No, I'm sort of serious.
255
00:12:32,985 --> 00:12:34,850
All right, fine, forget it.
256
00:12:37,223 --> 00:12:39,247
I'm just saying, you know,
it seems to me, on paper,
257
00:12:39,324 --> 00:12:41,258
that this thing
we have is pretty great.
258
00:12:41,326 --> 00:12:42,588
Yes, nerd.
259
00:12:43,294 --> 00:12:46,286
On paper, this thing
we have is pretty great.
260
00:12:46,364 --> 00:12:47,887
Mark is a great boyfriend.
261
00:12:47,965 --> 00:12:52,493
I have no complaints at all.
Everything is good.
262
00:12:56,406 --> 00:12:59,034
I don't know.
I don't feel right about this.
263
00:12:59,108 --> 00:13:01,736
Are you kidding me?
This is so much fun.
264
00:13:02,345 --> 00:13:04,779
Look, we took
a road trip today.
265
00:13:05,213 --> 00:13:07,374
We chased your mom's long
lost love down a freeway.
266
00:13:07,449 --> 00:13:08,780
He's a loon, Justin.
267
00:13:08,850 --> 00:13:09,908
So he freaked out a little bit.
268
00:13:09,985 --> 00:13:11,145
He got nervous.
I mean, you would, too.
269
00:13:11,219 --> 00:13:12,948
He was fine by the time we
got him back inside the car.
270
00:13:13,021 --> 00:13:14,282
Yeah, well, he cried
himself to sleep.
271
00:13:14,355 --> 00:13:16,585
I mean, I don't know
why you're pushing.
272
00:13:16,657 --> 00:13:18,318
Why do you want him
to spend time with my mom?
273
00:13:18,392 --> 00:13:20,053
How would that help her?
274
00:13:20,127 --> 00:13:22,755
I don't like this. I don't think this is gonna work.
I'm calling this off.
275
00:13:22,829 --> 00:13:25,593
Come on. No, no, no. Look, we're here.
Let's just see what happens.
276
00:13:25,665 --> 00:13:26,962
What happens is,
I drive him home.
277
00:13:27,033 --> 00:13:28,227
Now, look.
You need to breathe.
278
00:13:28,301 --> 00:13:30,098
I'm breathing. Okay?
279
00:13:36,341 --> 00:13:37,535
Mom.
280
00:13:38,043 --> 00:13:39,067
Oh!
281
00:13:39,144 --> 00:13:40,509
There you are.
282
00:13:40,579 --> 00:13:42,546
So, what's the big surprise?
283
00:13:42,613 --> 00:13:45,343
You gonna try to check me
into an old folks home?
284
00:13:45,416 --> 00:13:46,508
It's a long story.
285
00:13:46,584 --> 00:13:48,245
One that we'd love to tell
you over a cup of coffee,
286
00:13:48,319 --> 00:13:50,183
somewhere far from this place.
287
00:13:55,125 --> 00:13:56,319
Frank.
288
00:13:57,527 --> 00:13:58,754
Hello, Marlene.
289
00:13:58,828 --> 00:14:03,595
My gosh. I can't
believe it's really you.
290
00:14:04,767 --> 00:14:06,632
Wanna catch up?
291
00:14:08,369 --> 00:14:09,461
Sure.
292
00:14:14,142 --> 00:14:15,200
Oh, boy.
293
00:14:15,276 --> 00:14:16,799
Oh, boy.
294
00:14:18,869 --> 00:14:21,269
Do you think we
should stand by...
295
00:14:22,406 --> 00:14:25,971
She's fine.
Let's just let this unfold.
296
00:14:28,677 --> 00:14:32,135
Come here, sonny.
Let me tell you about the Civil War.
297
00:14:32,214 --> 00:14:35,110
Grandpa, leave me alone.
You smell like death.
298
00:14:39,550 --> 00:14:41,643
I'm gonna get some punch.
299
00:14:45,292 --> 00:14:50,491
Excuse me. You guys are really adorable.
It's really nice.
300
00:14:51,999 --> 00:14:54,933
So Leslie's like, "That's
it, I'm taking him home."
301
00:14:55,001 --> 00:14:57,561
So, we look over, and he's
not even in the car anymore.
302
00:14:57,618 --> 00:15:00,280
- You're kidding.
- No. It's insane.
303
00:15:01,606 --> 00:15:03,938
What does Leslie
think about all this?
304
00:15:04,009 --> 00:15:05,874
Oh, God, Leslie.
I don't even know.
305
00:15:05,912 --> 00:15:07,656
I think I just lost track
of her in all the chaos.
306
00:15:07,712 --> 00:15:09,407
Anyway, so, now he and Marlene
307
00:15:09,436 --> 00:15:11,098
are off somewhere,
doing God knows what.
308
00:15:11,882 --> 00:15:13,247
I don't wanna...
309
00:15:19,357 --> 00:15:21,791
You're suing me for alimony?
310
00:15:22,158 --> 00:15:23,216
Yes.
311
00:15:23,293 --> 00:15:26,299
When we were married, I got
accustomed to a certain lifestyle.
312
00:15:26,329 --> 00:15:29,092
And I'm entitled to money
to maintain that lifestyle.
313
00:15:29,164 --> 00:15:30,426
This is insane.
314
00:15:30,499 --> 00:15:32,524
Yeah, it's insane,
but it's all I got.
315
00:15:32,601 --> 00:15:36,196
And you can make it all go away
if you just gave me a chance.
316
00:15:36,271 --> 00:15:37,965
- What?
- Three dates.
317
00:15:40,041 --> 00:15:41,440
One date.
318
00:15:42,777 --> 00:15:44,005
Coffee?
319
00:15:44,078 --> 00:15:46,568
So your plan was to sue me,
320
00:15:46,646 --> 00:15:49,945
and then to use that to blackmail
me into falling in love with you.
321
00:15:51,818 --> 00:15:52,807
Yeah.
322
00:15:59,491 --> 00:16:01,652
Hey. You guys sound good.
323
00:16:02,494 --> 00:16:06,156
You really think so?
It's impossible to tell.
324
00:16:06,230 --> 00:16:07,788
It's like Bizarro Land
out there.
325
00:16:07,865 --> 00:16:09,924
As soon as we finish a
song, it's dead silence.
326
00:16:10,001 --> 00:16:11,366
Well, what do you
expect, you know.
327
00:16:11,436 --> 00:16:13,369
They're like
a million years old.
328
00:16:13,804 --> 00:16:15,567
Well, I'm glad you like it.
329
00:16:15,639 --> 00:16:17,630
You were always a big
supporter of the band.
330
00:16:17,708 --> 00:16:19,266
Hey.
Break's over.
331
00:16:19,343 --> 00:16:21,277
Ludgate, cracking the whip.
332
00:16:21,511 --> 00:16:24,673
Yeah, well, these old bags
paid for some entertainment.
333
00:16:24,747 --> 00:16:27,716
- So get up there.
- No, you're right. Okay.
334
00:16:27,783 --> 00:16:29,978
Hey, you should play that song
The Way You Look Tonight.
335
00:16:30,052 --> 00:16:31,075
Hmm.
336
00:16:31,152 --> 00:16:32,244
It's a good one.
337
00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:37,383
The next one's going out to a special
little lady named April Ludgate.
338
00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:42,656
Someday
339
00:16:43,998 --> 00:16:46,796
When I'm all alone
340
00:16:47,768 --> 00:16:50,395
Are you guys... never mind.
341
00:16:52,261 --> 00:16:53,748
- Why do you care?
- I don't.
342
00:16:53,773 --> 00:16:58,229
Just thinking of you
343
00:16:58,610 --> 00:17:01,511
And the way you look tonight
344
00:17:01,580 --> 00:17:04,049
What about you?
What do you do for a living?
345
00:17:05,350 --> 00:17:08,284
- Well, it's been an interesting ride.
- Yeah?
346
00:17:08,352 --> 00:17:11,719
I got a job at a grocery
store right out of college
347
00:17:11,789 --> 00:17:13,757
just for a way to make money.
348
00:17:14,525 --> 00:17:18,221
And here I am, 40 years later,
completely unemployed.
349
00:17:20,697 --> 00:17:21,925
Wow.
350
00:17:23,600 --> 00:17:27,330
What do you say we pick
up where we left off?
351
00:17:28,737 --> 00:17:30,364
You're not serious, right?
352
00:17:30,439 --> 00:17:32,566
I'm serious as a heart attack.
353
00:17:32,641 --> 00:17:34,039
Of which I've had four.
354
00:17:36,411 --> 00:17:39,312
And the world is cold
355
00:17:40,148 --> 00:17:42,343
I will feel a glow
356
00:17:42,417 --> 00:17:45,852
Just thinking of you
357
00:17:47,421 --> 00:17:51,380
And the way you look tonight
358
00:17:56,896 --> 00:17:59,330
Hey, Mom, are you okay?
Did Frank leave?
359
00:17:59,465 --> 00:18:01,625
Uh, yeah. He just
stepped away for a second.
360
00:18:01,699 --> 00:18:03,098
I'm so sorry
we brought him here.
361
00:18:03,168 --> 00:18:04,396
Oh, it's okay.
362
00:18:04,469 --> 00:18:06,266
It was very thoughtful,
sweetheart.
363
00:18:06,337 --> 00:18:07,736
It's not your fault
that he turned out to be...
364
00:18:08,907 --> 00:18:11,067
Excuse me. Hi.
Excuse me, hi.
365
00:18:13,110 --> 00:18:15,374
My name is Frank Beckerson.
366
00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:17,372
Marlene,
367
00:18:17,981 --> 00:18:19,140
you
368
00:18:20,616 --> 00:18:21,742
blew it.
369
00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:29,582
Take one last look, Marlene, because
you'll never see this body again.
370
00:18:31,827 --> 00:18:33,818
Marlene, what happened
between you two?
371
00:18:33,895 --> 00:18:35,590
Tell me everything.
I want every detail.
372
00:18:35,964 --> 00:18:38,625
Hey, we're almost done,
so we can leave soon.
373
00:18:38,699 --> 00:18:41,634
Yes. I'll take you
for an ice cream malted,
374
00:18:41,702 --> 00:18:43,966
and then we can go
choose our caskets.
375
00:18:44,038 --> 00:18:45,504
God, why does everything we do
376
00:18:45,572 --> 00:18:47,836
have to be cloaked in,
like, 15 layers of irony?
377
00:18:48,675 --> 00:18:50,540
Here's something un-ironic.
378
00:18:50,610 --> 00:18:52,100
Ever since you've been hanging
out with that meathead,
379
00:18:52,178 --> 00:18:54,304
you've become completely lame.
380
00:18:55,114 --> 00:18:56,741
You know what?
We're breaking up.
381
00:18:58,050 --> 00:19:00,746
Fine, then you can't make out with
me when you're drunk anymore.
382
00:19:00,819 --> 00:19:03,014
- Fine, then I'll make out with Ben.
- Pass.
383
00:19:03,088 --> 00:19:04,452
No, he's my boyfriend.
384
00:19:04,522 --> 00:19:06,547
You can either make out with
both of us or none of us.
385
00:19:06,624 --> 00:19:08,592
- Fine, none of you.
- Fine.
386
00:19:11,929 --> 00:19:14,863
I've got you
387
00:19:15,432 --> 00:19:16,899
Under my skin
388
00:19:22,938 --> 00:19:24,633
Everything okay, Knope?
389
00:19:25,040 --> 00:19:29,374
My boyfriend is a lawyer,
and he's smart and interesting,
390
00:19:29,445 --> 00:19:31,639
and there's a lot of
things about him I like.
391
00:19:31,713 --> 00:19:33,840
But he acted like
a real jerk today.
392
00:19:34,782 --> 00:19:37,148
I don't know. There's
something about the way
393
00:19:37,218 --> 00:19:39,651
he treats people or something.
394
00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:41,685
He's a tourist.
395
00:19:42,256 --> 00:19:45,657
He vacations in people's
lives, takes pictures,
396
00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:48,193
puts them in his scrapbook,
and moves on.
397
00:19:48,261 --> 00:19:50,752
All he's interested in
are stories.
398
00:19:51,697 --> 00:19:52,686
Huh.
399
00:19:53,866 --> 00:19:56,664
Basically, Leslie,
he's selfish.
400
00:19:57,569 --> 00:20:00,732
And you're not.
And that's why you don't like him.
401
00:20:02,974 --> 00:20:05,636
I told you so.
It's Duke Silver.
402
00:20:06,443 --> 00:20:09,901
Duke, can I have your autograph?
I love your music.
403
00:20:10,915 --> 00:20:13,475
You're mistaken, ladies.
Move along.
404
00:20:13,551 --> 00:20:18,180
I got you under my skin
405
00:20:21,124 --> 00:20:22,557
Yeah. Go Mouse Rat.
406
00:20:26,128 --> 00:20:28,062
I thought you were
just terrific.
407
00:20:28,130 --> 00:20:29,154
Seriously?
408
00:20:29,231 --> 00:20:30,858
You sound like Dean Martin.
409
00:20:31,733 --> 00:20:34,257
If I were 50 years younger...
410
00:20:35,436 --> 00:20:39,065
What?
Wait. Who's Dean Martin?
411
00:20:39,140 --> 00:20:43,098
If I'm not mistaken, that was the
old-lady version of flashing.
412
00:20:43,176 --> 00:20:44,370
Nailed the gig.
413
00:20:45,621 --> 00:20:49,408
Look, it's sad, I know.
But we'll still be friends.
414
00:20:49,825 --> 00:20:51,588
We're gonna see
each other all the time.
415
00:20:51,660 --> 00:20:53,651
I come into town,
like, every other weekend.
416
00:20:53,728 --> 00:20:56,972
No. You guys can't break up.
We can fix this. Let me talk to Leslie.
417
00:20:57,016 --> 00:20:59,310
Tom, it's over.
She doesn't wanna see me anymore.
418
00:20:59,353 --> 00:21:01,133
Is it my fault?
Did I do something wrong?
419
00:21:01,171 --> 00:21:02,195
No.
420
00:21:02,464 --> 00:21:04,659
Seriously, this has
nothing to do with you.
421
00:21:05,124 --> 00:21:06,450
Can we still go suit shopping?
422
00:21:06,545 --> 00:21:07,772
Of course.
423
00:21:07,827 --> 00:21:10,125
Armani's having a sale
right now.
424
00:21:10,410 --> 00:21:11,900
I'm gonna get you
a pocket square.
425
00:21:12,218 --> 00:21:13,617
All right.
32225
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