Original subtitles

The good ol' U.S. of A.

Scenery beautiful as ever.

What was it General MacArthur said?

"I have returned."

( evil laughter )

First,

so as not to spoil

my homecoming,

I think I'll send a little box of candy

to my old friend Diana Prince.

Some bonbons.

( evil laughter )

* Wonder Woman *

* Wonder Woman *

( thunderclap )

* Wonder Woman *

* Get us out from under Wonder Woman *

* Wonder Woman *

* Wonder Woman! *

( doorbell rings )

( ticking )

( thunderclap )

( helicopter approaching )

Hello, Mom?

Yeah, this is Bill.

No, nothing's wrong. No.

No. I got a message to call you from this phone booth.

Yeah, it did sound kind of crazy.

You didn't?

Welcome to Mariposalia, Bill Bethude.

Behave yourself, and nothing will happen to you

or your dear mother.

( laughing evilly )

( camera shutter clicks )

( with European accent ): I wasn't expecting you.

What do you think?

You really swing.

What does that mean?

Nothing. Everything. I don't know.

Nadia, marry me.

( chuckles )

Not right now.

( camera clicks )

What is it?

I don't know.

You seem frightened.

You always seem frightened.

Because I am.

Why?

Baby, it's been over a year since you defected.

The spies, the secret police--

they're ancient history now.

Not for me.

I know you think

I'm paranoid, but I am being followed

wherever I go.

And it's not the secret police.

Put an end to the paranoia, then. Marry me.

You're not listening to me.

Okay, who do you think is following you?

I don't know.

( camera clicks )

MARIPOSA: Hmm... Nadia Samara.

She is absolutely the finest?

Top pick, A.P., U.P.I. and Reuters.

Gold medals in Amsterdam, Zurich, Johannesburg,

Pan-American games, Scandinavian games.

None better.

She defected a year ago.

That's her boyfriend.

They're getting married.

A guaranteed gold medal?

A guaranteed Olympic champion?

No guarantees.

You've read her stats.

She's the best in the world

at this moment...

but no guarantees.

She's breaking training, Eric.

Bring her in.

It's time she joined our team.

( women giggle )

( clears throat )

You said the meeting was urgent.

You said nothing about formal.

You're dressed just fine

for what you'll be doing tonight.

Uh-oh. Something tells me

that I'm not going to spend the weekend

at home in front of my fireplace.

That's right. Two things: first...

Marion Mariposa is back.

How did you know that?

He sent me a little present-- the hello/good-bye type.

What?

It was nothing I couldn't handle.

What's second?

Second...

you recognize any of these athletes?

By reputation.

What do they have in common, other than the obvious?

Breakfast cereal?

Seriously, they're all missing.

The Olympic Committee came up with

an "address unknown" on all of these people.

None of them have signed their letter of intent.

Someone's undermining the Olympics?

It looks that way.

Hmm... okay, where do I start?

Well, all the missing athletes

were in or around the Los Angeles area

when they disappeared.

Here are your tickets.

The flight leaves at 6:00 a.m.

And all this time I thought

you were going to invite me to the ball.

Well, that'd be nice, but...

but I got hooked into escorting

a Lithuanian countess to the senate dance tonight.

Oh, poor you.

I've seen that Lithuanian countess.

She's gorgeous.

I really am late, Diana.

( clears throat )

I'll have more for you on this tomorrow.

I'll talk to you then. Bye.

Good night.

What is your problem?

A number of future Olympic game competitors

can't be located.

Menio Galios, Arthur Lopez,

Madave Tolia, Phil Brickoyd, Spidos Booker, Regis Crawford.

Thank you, Ira.

My assignment is to locate these men and women.

I do not know where they are,

but I do know who will disappear next.

Who?

Nadia Samara.

The gymnast who defected.

I met her in Munich.

Her disappearance will have nothing to do

with her defection.

What will it have to do with?

Insufficient data prevents me

from knowing the reason.

Okay, Ira.

Thank you anyway.

Good night.

Please give my regards to Wonder Woman, Diana Prince.

Wrists down, fingers high.

Elbow in, back straight.

Wrists down.

Fingers high.

Good.

Uh... Your Excellency?

I take it you've lowered the flag, Eric?

It's right here.

Folded properly?

Just like you told me.

Ah... good.

Is there some trouble with the recruits, Eric?

Nothing out of the ordinary.

Then why are you hovering?

I've just heard an ugly rumor about Diana Prince.

( all chuckling )

The late Diana Prince, you mean.

No, I'm afraid I don't.

( crashes piano keys )

I told you it was ugly.

Somehow she survived the bomb.

Hmm. Miss Prince's ability to survive dire circumstances

is surpassed only by mine.

Her presence continues to complicate matters.

The people coming in tomorrow can handle her.

I'm told they're tops in their field.

Which is?

Disposal.

( laughing )

Well put, Eric. Well put.

So I says, I can't be

in a cafeteria baking cookies

and run the booth at the same time.

Who do I get for a baby-sitter?

I just don't let anyone watch my kids, you know.

You got kids, Diana?

No.

Oh. Thanks. Hold this, please.

Thank you very much.

Well, it certainly has been a pleasure talking to you, Lois.

Say, you, too, honey.

Say, your bag's not down yet, huh?

No.

Oh... Someone meeting you?

No.

You want to share a cab?

Well, I'm renting a car.

Hey, listen, why don't you give me a lift? I live in the valley.

Well, I'm going downtown.

Oh, what a shame.

I could have shown you the way.

Los Angeles is my town, you know.

17... I used to stop traffic.

Now I'm lucky if I don't get run over.

Well, bye.

Bye.

( sighs )

You and your partner come very well recommended.

Well, we believe the only good customer

is a satisfied one.

We're also told your services are expensive.

It's a seller's market, isn't it?

I mean, if you could find somebody more qualified

and less expensive to do the job

you'd hire them, but you won't.

Because there's not.

Higher, higher, higher, higher, hi... $50,000.

$25,000 in front, and $25,000 when we deliver.

Oh, yes.

No, problem.

Anyone you hire will have to come out of your end.

Ah, the price includes everything,

or anything, as the case may be.

I'm glad you said that.

We've learned that the I.A.D.C. has begun to show interest.

Yes. I believe they've sent Diana Prince

to protect the little lady.

And what will you do about it?

Kill her.

( evil laughing )

Still here, Mr. Taggart?

Didn't Eric tell you I expect you

to carry out my assignments immediately?

Ah... he made it perfectly clear

you wanted no mistakes.

Now, my assistant had to make

certain... arrangements.

If you'll forgive me for asking

what's a guy like you want these athletes anyway?

"Guy"?

Did you call me...

"guy"?

I am royalty.

The emperor of a great country--

Mariposalia.

Ah...

This globe...

this tiny little globe will show you the esteem

with which the international community holds my country.

Mariposalia isn't there.

Can either of you tell me

the colors of Mariposalia's national flag, hmm?

Can you hum our national anthem?

Why is it that when the United Nations

sits to ponder the problems of the world

my ambassador's microphone is never working?

Why is it that the world knows how much wheat,

how many peanuts, the United States has to export each year

and yet no one can tell you what my country has to offer?

Why? Why is that?

Tell him, Eric.

Uh... public rel...

Relations!

Public relations.

Mariposalia evidently lacks an image.

And what is it that a country can do

to build an image where none existed?

To build one that will command

not only the attention of the world,

but its admiration as well?

Why, it is to win the Olympics!

The Olympic Games

will bring my country not only gold medals

but recognition and respect.

Ah! I am inspired, Mr. Mariposa.

Your Excellency.

Right.

( clears throat )

Uh... if you will excuse me

I will see to it that Nadia Samara

gets started on her extended vacation.

You're going to get her

without your partner?

This is the only partner that I need...

for a while anyway.

Your Excellency.

( knocking on door )

Who's there?

Diana Prince.

Who?

Diana Prince.

We met in Munich. Remember?

Hey.

Oh, honey.

Hey... what is it?

I only know I'm in trouble.

More than in Munich.

What happened?

Well, that's just it, nothing happened.

Someone is watching me. I know it.

I don't know who, but I can feel his eyes like...

like someone is behind the door

or in the next room or walking behind me.

It's like it was before in the country I left.

And I was right, wasn't I?

I really must be in danger

or you wouldn't be here.

Nadia, come on, sit down.

The I.A.D.C. is just a little bit concerned is all.

Now, I want you to leave the worrying to me, okay?

How did you know I was in danger?

A friend-- his name is Ira.

I have an Ira also.

Well, my friend is computerized.

Yours sounds a little bit more special.

What's his name?

His name is Tom Hamilton.

I met him at the university where I work out.

Mm-hmm.

He's special, all right.

He wants to marry me.

Oh, that's beautiful, Nadia.

But I keep saying no because...

because of whatever is happening to me.

Oh, come on, honey.

Come on. I told you to leave the worrying to me.

You look a little tired. Why don't you get some rest?

I will, Diana.

Okay?

You are going to stay?

Oh, yes. I'll be right here

curled up with a good book or something.

Lock your door.

( sighs )

No!

No!

Nadia!

Diana!

No!

( thunderclap )

( screams )

Oh, my God!

Let me go!

Stay right there!

( sobbing )

Stay right here.

( crying )

( panting )

You saved my life.

Thank you. Thank you.

You're welcome. Where do you live?

I don't live far from here.

It's just around the corner.

I can make it home all right.

Thank you, Wonder Woman.

You're welcome...

Lois.

Nadia!

Oh...

Oh!

Someone just tried to break into my apartment!

You sure it wasn't me?

You don't believe me!

Will you stop it?

I do believe you.

Aw, this is crazy.

I'm going to call the cops.

No. They must know by now.

The I.A.D.C. has sent an agent-- Diana Prince.

Well, where is she now?

I ran away from her.

I was scared!

Even she can't stop them!

Come here.

Stay with me.

I'll take care of you.

( loud thumping )

( gasps )

( chuckles quietly )

( sighs )

Nadia.

Come on.

Nadia!

Come on, honey. Quick!

Hurry!

Come on!

I don't know what's happening to me.

Those men keep trying...

Those men were simply completing their assignment...

at last.

Welcome, Nadia Samara.

( evil laughter )

200 feet.

You threw further than that in high school, Bill.

Perhaps you wish me to send the Taggarts

to Iowa to see your mother, Bill.

We could put her in a phone booth, Bill.

Do you really think

I would compete for your country?

Of course you will compete--

just like the rest.

This lovely young couple behind you will see to that.

You see...

they're champions of quite another sort--

assassination.

What do you mean?

Murder is... skill, in a way.

Depending, of course, on your point of view.

Wouldn't you say so, beloved?

I've always said so, darling.

Yes, you'll change your mind, Nadia.

You see, several of your team members have

at first, shown a certain reluctance to compete.

However, each of you has a clay pigeon--

a loved one or two in your life?

Mr. and Mrs. Taggart here...

well, they are my skeet shooters.

( mimics gun )

( snickering )

All my relatives are behind the Iron Curtain.

You can't hurt them.

Well... then we just might have to settle

for someone in the more immediate vicinity,

mightn't we?

Uh... excuse me.

They told me at the dorm I'd find Tom Hamilton here.

Some guys have all the luck.

I just want to ask him about his girlfriend.

How about asking me about my girlfriend?

She just left on a field trip.

And I'm afraid I'm on a business trip.

Oh.

Hamilton!

Hamilton, she wants to ask you about Nadia.

Hamilton!

Now, that's typical.

He's been acting crazy lately-- real wacko.

When was the last time you saw him with Nadia?

Oh, a while back.

I try to avoid both of them.

Sometimes she acts crazier than he does.

Okay, thanks.

Oh, you'd better be careful.

Why?

It might be contagious.

( laughs weakly )

( sighs )

Tom?

Tom, I just want to ask you a few questions.

Tom?

I'm a friend of Nadia's.

( thunderclap )

Tom, wait!

Wonder Woman.

I didn't know. I thought you were that lady...

I know. She's a friend.

I'm a friend, too.

We're both looking for Nadia.

I still am.

You don't know where she is?

No. I'm scared.

When's the last time you saw her, Tom?

Last night. She came in here telling me

someone tried to break into her apartment.

Then she ran out-- something scared her in here.

I haven't seen her since.

Hey, what's going on? I didn't call the cops

'cause I didn't want to make things worse.

What kind of trouble is she in anyway?

We're not sure yet.

What can I do?

I love that girl. I really do.

You have to do the hardest thing of all, Tom--

wait.

( phone rings )

Trevor.

Diana. I've been trying to reach you.

I was hoping you were.

I caught up with Nadia's boyfriend

and he has no idea where she is.

You got something?

Oh, we've had our agents checking the next of kin

of the athletes that have disappeared.

But no missing person reports?

Exactly, because

they're all scared to death.

None of them will admit anything's wrong.

Sons and daughters missing, and nobody will say a word.

Well, someone's threatening them, right?

It must be, but we don't know who or why.

Well, you haven't exactly made my day.

Listen, I'll be at Nadia's dormitory

if you come up with anything else.

I get the feeling that we're missing something terribly obvious.

Like Mariposa?

Like Mariposa.

Get back with me.

Right.

( soft violin music playing )

( chuckling )

Ah...

( chuckles )

Uh... something just occurred to us,

Your Excellency.

Out with it.

Something you mentioned earlier.

That upon all of your previous encounters with Diana Prince

Wonder Woman has shown up.

Mm-hmm.

My old friend does seem to move in fast company, doesn't she?

And now, in Nadia's apartment...

Wonder Woman.

Well.

And what occurred to you is that Wonder Woman

might make a superb addition to my Olympics team?

Right.

And it occurred to you

that if Diana Prince arrived

Wonder Woman wouldn't be far behind?

Right.

But did it occur to you to devise a plan

to capture one of I.A.D.C.'s top operatives?

( laughs )

Flowers.

Flowers?

( chuckling )

Hello, who is it?

Deliveryman.

Diana Prince?

Oh, yes, but this isn't my apartment.

How did you know I was here?

I just deliver them, ma'am.

They were sent by wire from Washington D.C.

Oh, they must be from Steve.

Hold on a second.

Here you go.

Thank you. Thank you.

"Rarer than roses

or mimosa, a little gift from Mari..."

( coughing )

Oh...

Well, I thought you'd be pleased to see a familiar face.

Not yours, Mariposa.

Did you enjoy the candy I sent you?

Not in the least.

I enjoyed the flowers even less.

Oh, what's the matter?

Lost your sense of humor?

I was hoping that I was rid of yours.

Weren't you supposed to have drowned in the North Sea

at the end of our last little encounter?

You should know that I always have my entrances and my exits

carefully choreographed.

Why, Diana, I had

one of my submarines pick me up.

Since when was kidnapping a part of your choreography?

With your case, since I became interested

in capturing Wonder Woman.

What do I have to do with Wonder Woman?

Ah, it's Wonder Woman's interest in you that interests me.

Yes.

You see, I am fielding

what will prove to be

the greatest Olympic team in the world.

These are some of the athletes I've recruited.

You will find that I treat them

like the thoroughbreds they are.

Plenty of rest, fresh air, sunshine, exercise.

They eat only the finest health foods.

No additives.

No preservatives.

Nothing but the best

for the Mariposalian Olympic team.

That's very interesting, Mariposa,

but what does that have to do with me or Wonder Woman?

Oh, isn't it obvious?

I want Wonder Woman on my team.

And since she always shows up

whenever an I.A.D.C. agent--

particularly you-- are threatened

I want you as of this moment

to consider yourself threatened.

Lock her up... at once!

You!

You keep your mother's picture in a wallet.

From this moment on, you may rest assured

that the dear lady is being viewed

from the very same angle

through the cross hairs of a telescopic sight.

And a rifle is trained on your father.

Your brother.

Your grandmother in Italy.

Your boyfriend.

Don't you touch him!

Oh, I won't.

No.

But the Taggarts might.

You remember Mr. and Mrs. Taggart?

Lois and Bo.

A lovely couple.

No! No, please.

( laughing maniacally )

Please.

( continues laughing )

NADIA: No!

Get rid of Tom Hamilton.

It's time our guests learn

that I mean business.

I said get rid of him.

I just wanted to point out that by getting rid

of the people we have under surveillance

your hold on the athletes will be weakened.

Nonsense.

Nobody ever runs out of loved ones.

Your case may be an exception.

What's happened?

The Taggarts are going to kill Nadia's boyfriend.

What?

They just left.

He was on the level.

It could have been my mother.

I'm really not hungry right now.

Okay.

( thunderclap )

( yelps )

Nadia. Where's Nadia?

She's fine. She's at the old Richardson estate.

Now get the police, and I'll meet you there.

"This other Eden, demi-paradise, this fortress.

"Built by nature for herself

"against infection and the hand of war.

"This happy breed of men.

"This little world.

"This precious stone

"set in a silver sea

"which serves it in the office of a wall

"or as a moat

"defensive to a house

"against the envy of unhappier lands.

"This blessed plot.

"This earth.

"This realm...

this... Mariposalia."

Oh, my country, right or wrong.

Mostly wrong.

It's quite a dream, Mr. Mariposa.

But I'm afraid it's only a dream.

I had more or less the same problem with Napoleon Bonaparte.

His dream was to conquer the world.

Mine is a little bit more realistic.

Oh, you call this realistic?

I'm beginning to lose my temper with you, Mr. Mariposa,

it's something I haven't done in five or six hundred years.

Then I would recommend a little self-control.

Many innocent people could suffer

and will, unless...

Unless I join your Olympic team?

( snickers )

Don't be so modest, Wonder Woman.

"Join it?"

Become it.

Represent Mariposalia

at the next Olympic games

and I will release all my prisoners.

They, and their loved ones, and Diana Prince

are in constant and immediate

danger, thanks to my associates.

Oh, the Taggarts.

Well, the Taggarts are in jail by this time.

And as for Eric,

let's just say that he's being detained.

The dream is over.

Don't just stand there, get her!

Have a seat, ladies.

It's finally over.

Mariposa's going to join the Taggarts in jail shortly.

ALL: All right!

( cheering )

You're free to compete

in the Olympics for your own countries

and by your own choice.

( cheering )

All right! Whoo!

Yeah!

Let's do it.

( sirens wailing )

( Mariposa laughing maniacally )

Hey, you guys, let's get rid of those cameras.

ALL: Yeah!

Is Diana safe?

Oh, yes, don't worry.

We'd like to invite her to a wedding.

She'd like that.

Many times Diana and I talked about my future.

Now is the beginning of it.

It's all downhill from here, darling.

Does that mean good?

You bet it does.

I'm going to teach you English.

On our honeymoon?

Yes.

Can you come, too, Wonder Woman?

Hey, wait a minute.

I mean to the wedding.

Oh, well... I'll make sure

that Diana gets an invitation.

One of us will be there you can count on it.

Thank you.

( all talking )

Well, one thing we can say for Mariposa

is that he sure put together a heck of a team.

And thanks to you, Wonder Woman

we're back on the road again. Right, guys?

ALL: Yeah.

Where'd you learn to throw two javelins?

Yeah.

You really want to know?

ALL: Yeah.

It was something my mother taught me.

ALL: Aw! Oh!

* Wonder Woman *

* Here to fight the force of evil *

* And your chance won't be denied *

* Woman of the hour with your super power *

* We're so glad you're on our side! *

* Wonder Woman! *

* You're a wonder, Wonder Woman! *