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Zulu
(heroic music)
Male guard: Security alert.
Prisoner's arriving through Gate B.
Hey, Hulkies, don't have much time, so let me get you up to speed.
A-Bomb: Regular viewers know that The Leader totally framed us
for trashing Vista Verde.
Not cool.
And things got worse when we got blamed
for wrecking the S.H.I.E.L.D. Tri-Carrier.
Way not cool.
To prevent any further damage,
we surrendered to Nick Fury,
the head of S.H.I.E.L.D.
(laughs) Man, dude is serious.
Now, they're throwing us in jail,
and not just any jail.
They're putting us in "the Vault,"
the maximest security prison of them all,
built to hold the worst of the worst...
Super-villains.
And we've put most of them here,
so they're not gonna be happy to see us.
One way or another, we've got to find a way
to prove we're innocent.
Deputy warden: All right, you gamma-freaks,
prisoner processing will be on your right.
A-Bomb: Uh, so this is a lot of firepower.
Red Hulk: You ain't kiddin', Jones.
(camera shutters clicking)
Make sure you get my good side.
Deputy warden: Let's go, prisoners.
The warden's waiting downstairs,
and he hates to be kept waiting.
(door buzzes)
All right, Hulks. Move out!
A-Bomb: Oh, how charming. Reinforced concrete,
exo-carbon steel bars,
and a bottomless abyss?
Whoa.
(clears throat)
(spits)
-(splash) -Man: Hey!
(laughs) Gotcha.
-Ow! -Back in line, prisoner.
Ugh!
I'm just gonna say this. I'm not enjoying prison.
(door buzzes)
A-Bomb: I knew it! They're putting us into the max cell block
with all the super-villains. Oh, no.
Absorbing Man.
Wrecker.
Thunderball.
Bulldozer.
Titania.
And Piledriver, too.
What did I tell ya?
The worst of the worst!
Sir, the new prisoners are here.
Red Hulk: He's the warden?
That's Warden Abomination to you.
Welcome to the Vault.
(grunts)
(theme music)
Hulk: Nick Fury would never put you in charge of this place.
He didn't.
The Army insisted I be made warden during your stay.
Abomination: After all, who knows your strengths and weaknesses better than I?
I'm sure you remember my unmanned Stark sentries.
More Hulkbusters?
The first thing I did was replace all the puny human guards.
Your weapons will be safely locked away,
-but you can keep your cameras. -A-Bomb: Oh, really?
-Hey, that's cool. -(grunts)
Abomination: They've been reprogrammed
to transmit directly into the Vault security system.
Okay, that's not cool.
Abomination: Get used to it.
You're in my house now.
Guards, escort our guests to their cells.
Absorbing Man: Heads up, Wrecking Crew.
Dead Hulks walkin'.
Wrecker: Gonna mess you up!
Welcome to the party, Hulks.
Better sleep with one eye open.
I'm a law-abiding patriot.
Makes me sick to be locked up with these scum.
Especially with Emil Blonsky turning the key.
They may be criminals, but no one's all bad.
Everyone deserves a chance to change.
Hulk's dreamin'.
There's not a drop of good in these creeps.
It's humiliating to be on the same side of the bars with them.
I've seen prison movies.
I know what happens to nice guys like me in the joint.
I'm gonna get shanked!
(whispering) I don't even know what that is.
Get comfortable, Hulks.
You check into the Vault, but you can never leave.
Not alive anyway.
(laughter)
Abomination's itching for any excuse to punish us.
So until we can find out what he's up to,
I ordered the team to behave like model prisoners.
Skaar: Skaar hate cage!
(yells)
Easy, Skaar.
That's not the way to get out of here.
But Skaar hate cage.
So whatcha readin', celly?
She-Hulk: Legal casebooks.
I'm working on a framework for my defense.
Let me give you a hand.
(book ripping)
-Hey! -You're wasting your time
if you think these law books are gonna get you out of here, sister.
She-Hulk: Is that so?
I have a law degree, sister.
If you applied yourself,
instead of living a life of crime,
you wouldn't be stuck in a place like this.
Superhero with a law degree,
but you're still locked up with me,
Counselor.
Titania: At least the road I took to get here was fun.
A-Bomb: Whoa, cool down, Red.
Red Hulk: Cool down?
I'm a decorated war hero.
I shouldn't be locked up with these low-lifes!
I mean "cool down"
as in you're heating up our cell like an oven.
(groans)
It just burns me up to think of all the real bad guys,
like The Leader, running around loose.
I'm working on an escape-way an-play.
Escape plan?
-What do you know about... -Zip it. Zip it.
Abomination's watching us, remember?
Red Hulk: If I know Blonsky,
he's got bigger plans than just being a prison warden.
Abomination: You got that right, Ross.
Ah, Hulk. Step into my office.
What'd you drag me up here for?
Someone wishes to speak with you.
How you holdin' up, Hulk?
Well, my bunk's too small, shower has bugs, and...
Oh, yeah, did I mention we're in prison for a crime we didn't commit?
Personally, I don't believe you're responsible.
Fury: But I can't get you out of there without proof.
As you for you, Blonsky,
I want your assurance...
No, make that a guarantee the Hulks won't be harmed.
Director Fury, you have my word.
The Hulks will be treated well
as long as they follow the rules.
But you're not going to follow the rules.
I think you're going to cause a riot.
And when your good friend Director Fury arrives,
you will destroy him in rage.
Tragic, no?
Being around all these villains turns you into one.
(roars)
Framing me is one thing,
but if you think you're gonna get me to go bad,
you're dead wrong.
Just because we're locked up like villains
doesn't mean we have to become villains.
A-Bomb: All right, lunch time.
Maybe this won't be so bad.
Nope.
Uh, I wouldn't feed this to Devil Dinosaur.
Food squishy. (chuckles)
(A-Bomb groans)
Wrecker: Hey, watch it, junior!
(all laughing)
Why, you bald punk!
No, Red, don't give them a reason.
Well, I wasn't hungry anyway.
Hulk's right.
We can't warn Fury about Abomination's plan
if we end up in solitary.
(grunts)
You gonna eat this, ya big green monster?
No?
Well, how about this, huh?
Ya big monster.
Help yourself, Creel.
How 'bout you, Corporal?
Do you like the chow?
-Oops. -(growls)
(Wrecking Crew laughing)
You know what, why don't you eat it?
Smashers, no!
(clamoring)
I've been waiting for this.
(device beeps)
(shutting down)
Hulk: It's a set-up.
Get ready, Hulks.
Wrecker: Let's wreck 'em!
Hey, sister,
that's no way to get time off for good behavior.
Red Hulk: You wanna win a food fight?
You gotta throw a knuckle sandwich.
(screaming)
(groans)
Abomination: Ah, finally awake.
As you can see, you're in solitary.
But don't worry, you won't be alone for long.
(distant harmonica music playing)
(harmonica music continues playing)
Ow!
Ow!
(both groaning)
Abomination: (over PA) Lights out.
(Absorbing Man chuckles) Lights around our cell doors are down.
Let's move, Wrecking Crew.
Hey, look.
Absorbing Man: It's our tools of the trade.
Time to tuck you in, Hulky.
(chuckles)
Well, what can I do for you boys?
Abomination wanted us to welcome you to the villain club.
So, welcome.
Hulk: Someone hit me?
Try again, I might feel it.
Oh, is there a fly in here?
Absorbing Man: (over PA) Laugh this off, Greenie!
-(grunts) -I'm no fan of Big Green,
but that's fighting too dirty.
Bad guys not fight fair.
Hulk's hanging tough,
but not even he can take this beating for long.
Tell me about this escape plan.
(Abomination laughing)
(beeps)
- What is it, Blonsky? -Abomination: There has been an incident.
Hulk wishes to see you in person.
I'm on my way.
(harmonica music playing)
Abomination: No outrage? No threats?
What are you up to, Ross?
-Red Hulk: Is he gone? -A-Bomb: Yeah, baby.
(crashing)
Red Hulk: Keep an eye out, Jones.
Abomination: Jones!
(electronic whirring)
Clever boy.
I know what you're thinking, how did we escape?
Rewind.
A-Bomb: So, I reprogramed my camera to play back a loop of us in our cell,
and then I went into camo mode.
And when a Hulkbuster came to do a bed check
and noticed one of us was missing...
Kabow! Kabop! Kablow! Kababababow! Whoa!
Red Hulk: Hold still, will ya?
A-Bomb: I am! Ow! Punch it, not me!
(crashing)
Yeah, I can't believe that worked, either.
Hulkbusters, escape in progress.
Target the Hulks and only the Hulks.
Lethal force is authorized.
Sounds like comrade grumpy pants is onto us.
(scoffs) Yeah, well...
Red Hulk: Now we can do a little fighting back.
I'm reading your alarm, Blonsky. Status report.
Just as I feared, Director Fury.
The Agents of S.M.A.S.H. have started a full-scale riot.
-Abomination: We've lost containment! - Our ETA is six minutes.
Can you hold out until then?
The situation is dire.
We may have to resort to extreme measures.
Blonsky, no...
(laughs)
-(banging) -(Hulk grunting)
Absorbing Man: Having you locked up in here with us is a dream come true.
Hulk: You don't get it.
I'm not locked up with you.
You're locked up with me!
(roaring)
(all grunting)
-(banging) -(all grunting)
(roaring)
(roaring echoes)
Yeah!
Hulk smash!
Oh, no.
This is what he was afraid of and what Abomination wanted.
(roaring)
Excellent.
(crashing)
Red Hulk: Get back!
You tin-plated shoats.
A-Bomb slash!
-You know, now I get the sword thing. -You bust out, Scruffy.
Red Hulk: I'll get Jen.
Time to initiate the purge.
A-Bomb: Hang on, Skaar, I'll get you out of there.
I think this belongs to you.
-Skaar: Now Skaar shank. -Oh, that's what that means.
What about her?
She's got reading to do.
Let's go save Greenie's bacon.
(gun cocking)
(Hulk grunting)
Someone ate Hulk's bacon.
-Whoa, now, Greenie. -Relax.
Red Hulk: Simmer down, hoss.
Easy, cousin. Chill.
Calm down.
Sorry. I... I lost control.
Abomination's making his play for S.H.I.E.L.D.
-We gotta warn Fury. -(rumbling)
Now what, earthquake?
No, but something bad.
Great. Place is locked down and we're already against
Hulkbusters, villains, and Abomination, Greenie.
We still playin' nice guy?
We have no choice now.
We have to escape. Come on!
Hulk: This door leads out. Help me pull.
(all grunting)
(zooms)
(grunting)
(all screaming)
Hang on! Ah!
Come on, baby!
Let's finish these losers once and for all.
You sure about this, Carl?
Absorbing Man: Don't go soft on me, toots.
What you need is a little steel in your spine.
(grunting)
A-Bomb: So the emergency riot failsafe
is to rocket the prison into space?
Look out!
Seriously, can we get a break?
Whoa!
Red Hulk: Take cover!
Carl!
(crashing)
Creel, grab on.
Why'd you save me?
'Cause you're not a bad guy,
you just do a lot of bad stuff.
Blonsky took the escape jet.
Well, if he's bailing,
something really bad is about to happen, right?
Computer: Gamma core detonation in T-minus five minutes.
Uh, we go boom?
Big time, Shaggy.
Blonsky took the only way off this Roman candle.
That scaly creep betrayed us!
And you're surprised, why?
What's going on there? Why was the purge initiated?
It's Abomination. He wants to destroy us all,
including you.
He's on my six tight.
Ah, today I finish the job
The Leader and I began back in Vista Verde.
Abomination: The total annihilation of Hulk and the Agents of S.M.A.S.H.
We can't evacuate you, Hulk.
Hulk: Take care of yourself.
We'll shut down the reactor.
We'll help.
-Right, Carl? Hey! -No.
Hulk saved your life after you ganged up on him.
Do something good for once in your life.
Computer: Gamma core detonation in T-minus two minutes.
Can we stop the countdown?
Red Hulk: It's too late. He set the reactor to overload.
We have to eject the whole thing.
Hulk: Red, Jen, eject the core!
Everyone else, smash!
She-Hulk: Titania, watch it!
Thanks. Guess I owe you one.
Don't you forget it!
Peekaboo! Peekaboo!
Skaar shank!
Nice!
Hmm. I wasn't briefed on this panel.
When in doubt, push the big one.
Computer: Gamma core overload in T-minus 30 seconds.
-Get it out of here, hurry. -She-Hulk: We can't.
The release mechanism has been sabotaged.
Blonsky thought of everything.
Absorbing Man: Not everything.
I'll buy you goons some time.
(grunting, screaming)
She-Hulk: It's working. He's slowing the overload.
Quick, release the clamps.
(shouting)
Got you!
(explosion)
(grunting)
There's more than one way to skin a Hulk.
You're outgunned, Blonsky.
This is far from over.
(Abomination laughing)
(explodes)
Fury: Put your hands down.
While Blonsky was uploading his security footage
of you Hulks at the Vault,
we hacked in and saw what really happened at Vista Verde.
You were framed by the Abomination.
Uh, yeah, that's what we've been saying all along.
Fury: But now, we've got proof.
Plus with your heroic actions today, you'll be cleared.
Probably get a medal.
-Innocent! -Hoorah!
-Oh, yeah! -No more cage!
Finally.
The remaining prisoners will be transferred to a new facility.
Hold it, Creel.
You helped save all our lives today.
I won't forget that.
I was trying to save my life!
The rest was coincidence.
Next time we meet, we're enemies.
Don't forget that, either.
She-Hulk: You did good today.
And I kind of liked it.
Titania: Maybe I'll try it again someday.
If you stay out of trouble,
I'll try to help with your parole.
Thanks, Counselor.
See ya in court.
The greatest heroes aren't the strongest
or the best fighters,
but the ones who inspire others
to become better people.
Hulk out.
(closing theme music)
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