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(dramatic theme music)
- [Narrator] In the late 20th century,
hostile forces inside the United States grow strong.
The city of Los Angeles is ravaged by crime and immorality.
To protect and defend its citizens, the United States
Police Force is formed.
A presidential candidate predicts a millennium earthquake
will destroy LA in divine retribution.
- Like the mighty fist of God,
Armageddon will descend upon the city of Los Angeles,
the city of sin, the city of Gomorrah, the city of Sodom
and waters will arise and separate this sinful,
sinful city from our country.
- [Narrator] An earthquake measuring 9.6
on the Richter scale hits at 12:59 PM,
August 23 in the year 2000.
After the devastation, the Constitution is amended,
and the newly-elected president
accepts a lifetime term of office.
The country's capital is relocated from Washington, DC,
to the President's home town of Lynchburg, Virginia.
Los Angeles island is declared no longer part
of the United States, and becomes the deportation point
for all people found unfit to live in a new, moral America.
The United States Police Force, like an army,
is encamped along the shoreline,
making any escape from LA impossible.
From the south-east of Orange County
to the north-western shore of Malibu,
the Great Wall excludes LA from the mainland.
The President's first act as commander in chief
is Directive 17.
Once an American loses his or her citizenship,
they are deported to this island of the damned
and may never come back.
(dramatic theme music)
(alarm blaring)
- [PA] Attention, we are on tactical alert.
Remain at battle stations.
I repeat, remain at battle stations.
(helicopter hovering)
(background chattering)
- [Reporter] This is the Police Channel,
and this is Prime News.
In a late-breaking story, the Force has announced
the arrival of the most notorious outlaw in US history
at Firebase Seven, the deportation center
for Los Angeles island.
Now this on-the-scene report.
- War hero, criminal, The Force's most wanted man.
Convicted of 27 moral crimes.
Arrested two weeks ago on a charge of gunfighting for profit
in New Vegas, Thailand, US territory.
It's been 16 years since his famous rescue in New York,
and the reports of Plissken sightings
have remained constant during that time.
- [Brazen] Commander?
I'm still getting a trace from the rescue team, sir.
- Stationary signal?
- Has not moved from this location.
- That means he's hiding, captured, or dead.
- So we go with Plissken?
- He's all we've got.
(bluesy guitar)
- Hello, Plissken.
Welcome to LA.
- [Officer] Up five link!
- Come on, move it.
- [Brazen] That's Snake Plissken?
- What did you expect?
- I don't know, he just looks so retro.
Kind of 20th century.
- Good old days, let's get going.
- [Reporter] People of the United States
have waited a long time for this criminal.
- [Soldier] Move out!
- [PA] You are now entering the deportation center.
You have been found guilty of moral crimes against
the United State of America and sentenced
to permanent expulsion beyond its borders.
Any failure to comply with processing
instructions will be met with use of force.
- Take a look at them, Plissken.
Prostitutes, atheists, runaways.
We're throwing out the trash.
SD Bob Plissken, Special Forces, two Purple Hearts.
Youngest man ever decorated by the President.
Rescued a different President in '97.
So, what happened to you, war hero?
You were the best we had.
Now you're just like one of them.
You had it all, and you turned away from your country.
Why, huh?
The whole nation's watching.
Every good and decent person who works hard
and follows the rules.
Be my guest.
What do you have to say, Plissken?
- Call me Snake.
- [PA] You are now entering the processing area.
The next scheduled departure to LA is in one hour.
- [Officer] Get over there!
(door slamming)
- [PA] You now have the option to repent of your sins
and be electrocuted on the premises.
(electricity sparking)
If you elect this option, notify the cleric sergeant
in your processing area.
(dramatic theme music)
(door opening)
- How's it going, hotshot?
You know, I got to admit,
I thought we had you in Cleveland.
Come on, tell me, how'd you do it?
- Get to the deal.
- What?
- You need me for something, what is it?
- Show him.
- At 1030 hours Wednesday, a group of government officials
began a tour of the Benford Space Defense Lab.
The President's daughter Utopia was among them.
Somehow during the tour, she came into possession
of a top-secret prototype unit.
One hour later, she boarded Air Force Three for Lynchburg.
- To the American people.
Now is the time to rise up and demand the surrender
of the President and his corrupt theocracy
of lies and terror!
- At 1140 hours, she hijacked Air Force Three.
We scanned this onto the VR.
Check it out.
- Today is day one of a brand-new world.
The days of empire are finished.
To the President, my father.
You know what's in here, and unless you open
your borders, allow all the wrongfully accused
to return to their country, I will use this on you
and on the United States.
- Her emergency escape pod landed somewhere in LA.
Her ELT signal ceased immediately.
And after that, silence.
- We sent in a five-man rescue team.
Within a few hours of landing on the island,
all but one of them was killed.
- Hell of a team.
- Skip the commentary, Plissken.
- Snake.
Call me Snake.
- Get on with it.
- Right after her sister committed suicide,
Utopia began to withdraw from life
into her virtual reality simulator.
She'd punch up her own little world in cyberspace
and stay in it for days at a time.
- Somebody else was in there with her.
- Utopia made tapes of her VR experiences
and then tried to erase them,
but she missed one five-second image.
We ran a data scan and found this fragment
on the end of her last tape.
- [Malloy] Cuervo Jones.
Peruvian terrorist, Member of the Shining Path.
Runs the Mescalito Justice,
the biggest, baddest gang in LA
- Somehow, Cuervo Jones managed to tap
into the VR master data bank.
Utopia was lonely, looking for something to believe in,
and so he used her to steal the black box.
- Sad story, you got a smoke?
- This is serious, Plissken.
The black box is a matter of national security.
- It looks like it belongs to Utopia's lover-boy now.
- [Malloy] Yeah, we want it back.
- I'll bet.
What's it do?
- Top secret, only on a need-to-know.
- Evidently, I don't need to know, so fuck you.
I'm gonna Hollywood.
- If you go into LA, bring back the black box,
and you will receive a full pardon
for every immoral act you have ever committed
in the United States.
- Sounds familiar.
- An immediate answer.
Yes or no?
- Who are you?
- I'm your President.
- I understand you got some domestic problems.
- Put that black box in my hand, and you're a free man.
- I can see you're real concerned about your daughter.
- Utopia is lost to me.
My daughter is gone.
- Last chance, hotshot.
- For what?
- Freedom, sir.
- In America?
That died a long time ago.
- All right, I've heard enough of this.
Explain to this foot soldier
why he's gonna do what we tell him to do.
- What's he talking about?
- The Plutoxin Seven virus.
- Genetically engineered, 100% pure death.
Complete nervous system shutdown.
- You crash.
You bleed out like a stuck pig.
It's not a pretty sight.
I see.
You figure you inject that shit into me
and I'll do whatever you want, just like New York, huh?
- You got it, Snake.
- One question, which one of you assholes
gets to die trying to stick me?
- You don't understand.
It's already in you.
- Catches on quick, doesn't he?
- [Computer] Your countdown clock is now activated.
- Designer viruses, Plissken, wave of the future.
Right now you've got less than 10 hours to live.
- It's already moving through your bloodstream.
Go ahead, put your hand on that touch pad.
Of course, there is an antidote, and it neutralizes
the virus immediately upon injection.
- Which I will personally authorize
once your mission is completed.
The man is too dumb to survive LA
- We're holograms, Plissken.
Give us a little credit, we're not that stupid.
(clock beeping)
- Get this crap out of me.
- I guess we've got a deal.
(clock beeping)
- Nice to be working with you, hotshot.
- You'd better hope I don't make it back.
All of you.
- Core burner, magnesium ammo, 500 extra rounds.
Oral projectile, mouth dart.
The dart is filled with urolyde.
It will stun the enemy for several seconds.
- Every member of the rescue team had a tracking chip
implanted in his arm.
I think one of them might still be alive.
Use the tracer in your watch to locate him.
- This is a holocam.
It's a portable holographic camera.
It'll project your image up to a half-mile away.
100% audio send and receive capabilities.
- It's a prototype, confuse and deceive the enemy.
- Now, it as a mini-nuke battery good for about
eight minutes, but you can only use it once.
- So you better save it for when it counts.
Stick matches, plain, old-fashioned stick matches.
Never know when you might need them.
- Where are my guns?
- I thought you might want those.
Stealth clothing, fire retardant, nullifies heat detection.
Put them on.
- I'll take the coat.
- You'll take them all.
(bluesy band music)
- All right, listen up, Plissken.
LA's being primed as a beachhead for an invasion
of the United States.
- War is about to be declared, Plissken,
or didn't you know?
Oh, that's right, I forgot.
You don't give a shit, do you?
- Cuervo Jones runs with Shining Path.
Their goal is to take back North America.
It's the revenge of preindustrial societies.
- Shining Path has united all Third-World countries.
The Cubans and Brazilians are poised to invade Miami.
- If the Ugandans and Colombians make a run at the border,
we've got a full-scale attack on the United States.
- High stakes, hotshot.
- [Snake] How am I going in?
- Under the San Fernando Sea.
Shark three submarine, one-man submersible.
Just like the turbine model,
only this one's nuclear-powered.
It's very simple, throttle up, keep it in the green,
throttle back.
- You'll put ashore at the Cahuenga Pass.
Make your way up through the mountains
toward the Hollywood Bowl.
Use your tracer to locate the last member
of the rescue team.
If he survived, he's the only source of information
you'll have on the island.
- Do I bring him back, too?
- No, negative.
- [Snake] Figures.
- For all we know, he's already dead.
In any case, once you go inside, you're on your own.
When the black box is secure, get back to the submarine
as fast as you can.
It's your only way out, Plissken?
You know what to do with the girl.
This nation doesn't need to waste any more time and money
on bullshit trials for high treason.
Kill her.
- Is that an order from the President?
Absolutely, or let's just say it's what's best
for the country.
- By the way, who gives me the antidote?
- A medical team will be standing by.
- Neither one of you?
- [Malloy] No.
- Good.
(chuckling)
- Thought you might try that, hotshot.
That's why the first clip is loaded with blanks.
Bye-bye, Snake, good luck.
- [Officer] Nice and easy now.
(dramatic theme music)
- [Malloy] Com check.
- Yeah, I'm here.
- Stand by for launch.
- [Computer] Eight hours, eight minutes, 26 seconds
to neuro-system shutdown.
- [Malloy] Ignitor.
Fuel rod injection.
- She's in the green.
- [Malloy] Lock fuel rods.
- Locked.
- Nuclear turbine to 75% power.
- 75% power.
- Hands on switches and counting.
Five, four, three, two, one.
Launch.
(suspenseful theme music)
Hey, watch your speed, hotshot.
There's lots of obstructions down there.
- His reactor's starting to overheat.
- Slow it down, Plissken.
You're overloading the power plant.
- You slow down, dickhead.
I'm the one who's dying.
- [Malloy] Plissken!
- [Computer] Power plant overload.
Guidance systems malfunction.
You no longer have control stick function.
Obstruction dead ahead.
(suspenseful theme music)
(suspenseful theme music)
Plissken.
- Yeah, I'm here, Cahuenga Pass.
- [Malloy] What the hell happened to the submarine?
Disappeared off our screens.
Plissken!
- I got to go.
- Too bad about your boat, man,
but we'd appreciate it if you'd stay off our beach.
- Just passing through.
- You look kind of familiar.
(thunder clapping)
(distant shouting with guns firing)
♪ Just last 10 seconds down ♪
♪ Free flowing don't lose control ♪
♪ 10 seconds down free flowing ♪
♪ Don't lose control ♪
♪ 10 seconds down ♪
♪ Free flowing don't lose control ♪
♪ 10 seconds down ♪
(thunder clapping)
- What do you want?
- Nothing, dude, I just realized who you are, that's all.
- That's all?
- Come on, man, I'm not looking for trouble.
You know, I used to see you a lot
when I surfed the birds.
See you on the Police channel.
You're pretty far out, Snake.
I mean, cool.
But I kind of thought you'd be taller.
- Which way to the Hollywood Bowl?
- Down that way.
(low rumbling)
It's just an aftershock.
No big deal, we get them all the time.
Thanks for not killing me, man, I owe you one.
Acid rain.
Hey, Snake, what are you doing here anyway?
I heard they busted your hump pretty good
down in Cleveland.
(heavy rock music)
♪ Sweating and bleeding ♪
♪ And staring and thinking ♪
♪ Sinking deeper ♪
♪ And the tunnel's black I'm swimming ♪
♪ And the sun is burning hot ♪
♪ Get on the hunter ♪
- [Computer] Location of rescue team member.
50 yards southeast from your present position.
♪ Seems like I've been here before ♪
♪ Seems so familiar ♪
♪ Seems like I'm slipping ♪
♪ Into a dream within a dream ♪
- [Computer] Location of rescue team member,
40 yards from your present position.
♪ Check me now ♪
♪ Say it say it ♪
♪ Oh honey bring it through tonight ♪
- [Computer] Rescue team member is located
10 feet from your present position.
- Hey, man, 100 bucks says you can't
Put three blades into him.
You want a throw?
Hey one-eye, I'm talking to you, man.
- Where can I find Cuervo Jones?
- What do I look like, a fucking tour guide?
- Hey!
- It's wintertime, baby.
- I'm looking for Cuervo Jones.
- Why, you work for Hershe?
Hershe looking for Cuervo, too.
- Where is he?
- You can see him on Sunset.
He's supposed to be coming by any time now.
- Sunset.
- Boulevard.
Ooh-hoo, you really are new, aren't you?
Come on, baby, I'll show you.
Keep going down that way, honey.
You can't miss it.
- Hey, one-eye!
Look in my face when I talk to you, shit-heel.
- Whoa!
(people panicking)
(soft music)
(background chattering)
♪ Hold on to where you are ♪
♪ Hold on to where you ♪
♪ I face the change I've tasted pain ♪
♪ Digging a hole now take the blame ♪
♪ I fell aside I cast away ♪
♪ Covered in shame now take the blame ♪
(people chattering)
- [Computer] Neuro-system shutdown, seven hours.
- Plissken.
- Yeah, go ahead.
- Did you find the team member?
- Yeah, they're using him for target practice.
He's not gonna to be much help.
- What are you gonna do?
- [Cuervo] Amigos, no matter where you come from,
no matter what color your skin is,
we're all one raza, the raza of the oppressed--
- Watch the parade.
- [Malloy] What?
- We've got the north by the balls.
Come on, right, right?
Meet me at the Happy Kingdom.
Let's party tonight because tomorrow
we're gonna start our way back to glory!
Yeah!
(audience cheering)
(upbeat music)
- Yeah!
Oh, hey!
Ah!
- Yeah, we got our freedom, we got a future!
(biker shouting in foreign language)
(grunting)
(grunting)
(tires squealing)
- That looks like Snake Plissken.
- Who?
- He used to be a gunfighter.
Kind of faded out from the scene a few years ago.
I hear he slowed down some.
(automatic guns firing)
- Doesn't look that slow, Cuervo.
- [Bystander] Watch it, watch it!
(upbeat music)
- No problem, no!
- Nobody rolls into town and disrespects me.
Not Snake Plissken, not nobody.
Bolas.
(upbeat music)
(driver shouting in foreign language)
(Snake grunting)
Take him out!
- I'm gonna to give you assholes a chance.
(men laughing)
What do you say we play a little Bangkok rules?
(soft harmonica music)
Nobody draws until this hits the ground.
You ready?
Draw.
(tires squealing)
(men chattering in foreign language)
- Hey, he left his coat here, man.
- Malloy.
- I'm here, Plissken, have you got the black box?
- Negative, and I just lost the core burner and holocam.
- I don't need to know what your problems are, Plissken.
I just want my black box.
Now, you've got 7 1/2 hours, do you read me?
- Listen to me, Malloy, this guy's got more heat
around him than the President.
Now, I can get your precious little box back,
but I'm gonna to need more time, you understand?
- You listen to me, Plissken.
- That little headache that just kicked in
will only get worse.
You're starting to feel the effects of the virus.
Soon you'll have a fever followed by a lack of energy.
Now, you bear that in mind, just push on through, soldier.
(device beeping)
(soft bluesy theme)
(rumbling)
(sort rattling)
- Oh, don't shoot, don't shoot.
Thought it was you.
Yeah, I recognized you right away.
Oh, I've been hanging out around here
for more years than I want to think about,
but I never thought I'd see Snake Plissken
cruising Sunset Boulevard.
It's a real pleasure to meet you.
I'm Map to the Stars Eddie.
- Where's Cuervo Jones' place?
- Oh, he's the man with the juice, Snake.
He's got the President's daughter.
He's setting up something big, but I got a feeling
you know all about that, right?
- Location.
- That way.
If you're gonna go through Beverly Hills,
you're gonna need a map.
It's prerecorded, I narrated it myself.
Welcome to your very own map to the stars.
That's me.
Sure, we all know the big one wiped out
the entertainment industry here in LA,
but the glamor and excitement of Hollywood is still alive,
so come with me and see where the stars--
Hey, Snake, you're gonna need this, I'm telling ya.
All right, I'll give you a deal, 50,000 bucks.
That's a real bargain.
Map to the Stars Eddie, and here we go.
Sucker.
(distant gun firing)
(sirens wailing)
(men shouting and clamoring)
- Ssh, stay down, man, or they'll see you.
This is only their second shift.
You make one move, and we're done.
And don't make noise.
If you want to make noise, go and find another bush.
- You're the one making all the noise.
(haunting theme music)
Ah, shit!
(man grunting)
- Plissken's tracer just went down.
- Terminated?
- Yes, sir, we can't even locate him
on heat seek, he's wearing stealth.
- Now what?
- We sit tight, and we wait for the man
to communicate with us.
- Wait, for how long, he's probably dead.
- Wait, Mr. President.
Be patient.
(people chattering)
(distant screaming)
(distant screaming)
- I told you to stay down, now look what you've done.
Oh, I can't believe this.
Are you Snake Plissken?
You look like him, in a way.
By the way, genius, we're both dead meat.
(distant screaming)
- What are they?
- Surgical failures.
They live here.
Too many implants and face-lifts over the years.
Their muscles turn to Jell-O.
The only way they survive is to have fresh body parts
transplanted over and over again.
Oh, my God.
- [Snake] Who's that?
- The surgeon general of Beverly Hills.
- These are no good.
You couldn't give them away.
And this,
I can do nothing with this one.
Yeah, wheel it away.
- [Worker] You heard what the man said, get rid of it.
- I can't work with garbage like this.
Now, these two.
They look very good.
My God, they're real.
(ominous music)
What a beautiful blue eye.
Shame he only has one.
Nurse.
Still,
one eye's better than none.
Anybody moves, I blow his brains out and then yours.
You, get my guns.
Now.
Back off.
Now, everybody relax, and he won't die.
- Hey, hey, man, help me.
You're never gonna find your way out of here without me.
Really.
- Cut her down.
- [Worker] Hey, get moving!
- Down there.
Quickly.
(men clamoring)
- [Snake] Get in.
(crowd clamoring)
- I think we lost them.
(clock beeping)
- I think we're lost.
(clicking tongue)
- This way.
I used to run guns with the Black Jihad last year.
We drove golf carts up and down these tunnels.
I know them like the back of my hand.
You are Snake Plissken, aren't you?
- I used to be.
- I thought you'd be taller.
So, what are you doing in LA?
- I'm dying.
- Ooh.
But first you got to find something?
- President's daughter, she's with Cuervo Jones.
- So you want to go to Cuervo's place?
I've been there once.
- Show me.
- All right.
I used to hear about you all the time,
like they could never catch you no matter what you did.
Very cool, Snake.
- Sooner or later, they get everybody.
- Up.
(distant guns firing)
Cuervo Jones' place is down that way.
(Snake coughing)
Get off at the Vermont exit, go south.
You can't miss it.
Be careful, though, this is Korean Dragon territory.
It's very dangerous around here.
Bye.
Snake?
When you find the President's daughter,
are you gonna take her back?
- No.
- [Taslima] So you are staying in LA?
- Not if I can help it.
- Sun is coming up in a few hours.
UVs' gonna be bad today.
I know a place where we could crash if you want.
My boyfriend and I broke up tonight, so,
I'd love to take care of you
and make you feel good.
I'll read your future.
- The future is right now.
(eerie music)
(distant chattering)
- And condemn the innocent blood.
Dear God, we call on You to be our defense,
our rock, and our refuge, let us pray.
We give thanks for being alive and pray that
in Your mercy--
- Snake, it's me, Taslima.
I'm coming with you to Cuervo's place, yeah?
They're new.
They don't belong to any gang.
They're just scared, that's all.
That's how I was when they first deported me.
- Why are you here?
- I was a Muslim in South Dakota.
All of a sudden, they made it a crime.
- I mean, why do you stay, you can go south, Mexico.
- LA is still the place, Snake.
If you think about what's happened
on the other side of the world, that's the prison.
This is the only free zone left, anywhere.
- Dark paradise.
- At least we get something out of the deal.
A girl can still wear a fur coat
if she wants to, for example.
No, no, no, once you figure out this place,
it's really not so bad.
(gun firing)
(man shouting in foreign language)
- Get down!
(automatic guns firing)
(guns firing)
- [Bystander] Where's it coming from?
- [Second Bystander] The car in the street below!
(beeping)
(automatic gun firing)
(gunman shouting in foreign language)
- Hop in, Snake, come on.
I didn't think I'd ever see you again.
How did you get out of Beverly Hills?
Nobody ever gets out of there alive.
- Yeah, maybe that's why you let me walk in there.
- Oh, come on, man, I tried to tell you,
you need one of my maps to get around.
- [Bystander] Shut up down there!
(woman shouting in foreign language)
- You got to start listening to me, Snake.
I got connections around here.
If you need anything, I'm the man to see.
You can't just be walking around town
without knowing the ropes.
You take the wrong street, you're dead, pal.
- Stop the car.
- All right, Snake, anything you say.
Although I was gonna take you to Cuervo Jones' place.
- Where is it?
- It's right over there.
(distant gun firing)
(Snake grunting)
It's pretty neat, huh?
This is Cuervo's car, he lets me use it sometimes.
Hey, not to worry, Snake.
You've just been shot with a fun gun.
Feel it, you feel it?
It's pure mesh, man, 100 proof artery choker.
It's like Cuervo says, when the hit pulls you down
to one inch from death, that is living, man.
You should have talked to me first.
I could have set this up, I'm actually Cuervo's agent,
and I would love to represent you.
We could make a bundle together, I could help your career.
You're a legend and all, but last couple of years,
it's like you've fallen off the face of the earth.
Cuervo, I delivered him, didn't I?
I figured out what the cops sent him in to do.
Plissken was the second rescue team.
He was supposed to get the black box and the girl
and take them back out over the wall.
All I'm asking for is a finder's fee after you take over.
Maybe Wisconsin, I don't know.
- OK, We're almost set up, Cuervo.
- [Cuervo] Good.
- Well, I originally heard about this
when I was working for NASA.
Check this out.
Common, ordinary remote-control unit, yeah?
Everyone's got one, right?
Here's the kicker.
This instruction disk hooks you
right into the sword of Damocles,
the ultimate defensive weapon system.
You see that?
There's a ring of satellites encircling the Earth.
Attached to each satellite is a mega neutron bomb.
When detonated, each satellite unleashes an intense
electromagnetic pulse,
but EMP doesn't harm a living thing.
What it does do is shut down every known power source,
all electrical devices, cars, airplanes, toasters,
computers, everything, even batteries.
But this
makes this an aiming device
that gives the user incredible accuracy.
You can pinpoint precisely what you want to shut down.
A taxi cab in Buenos Aires, the entire country of Spain.
Amazing, brilliant.
Hell, you could key in all the satellites and shut down
the whole planet, send it right back to the Dark Ages.
- Let's face it, he's dead.
- I agree.
- Plissken's been dead so many times
I can't count them all, but he never stays down.
- The mission's scrubbed, Commander.
I should never have let you talk me out of that air strike.
Well, it's on now.
Effective immediately, full-scale.
Target, Los Angeles.
Flatten it, burn it.
- No!
- What did you say to me?
- Cuervo Jones is holding all the cards now, sir.
He sees our aircraft come in, he pushes that button, kaboom!
There goes our aircraft, and there goes
the United States of America.
- We don't even know if he knows how to work
the goddamn thing.
- Snake Plissken, American outlaw.
You're going to like this.
- Remember, Cuervo, you got to punch in
the world code first, 666.
That brings all the satellites online.
Then you can aim the prototype.
- Eh, pendejo, you think I'm stupid?
- No, no, no, I'm sorry, Cuervo.
- [Cuervo] Bring them in.
(henchman speaking in foreign language)
- OK, OK, go on.
- Hello, North America.
Buenas noches, Sud America.
Yes,
I am Cuervo Jones.
- Wait a minute.
That's Plissken. - This is the real LA
People without hope, without a country.
- I knew it, he's alive.
- You know what they want?
Liberation.
Now it's their turn.
I'm taking over with this.
Now, I told you not to try to get this back, didn't I?
But you disobeyed me.
Well...
(monitor beeping)
- He's entering the target code.
- Bend over, Mr. President.
Time for a spanking.
- He's targeting Lynchburg, that'll shut down the capital.
- Patch me in to the White House.
- This broadcast is going out live all across the country.
- Yes, this is the President.
Get me my wife, please.
- [Eve] Are you watching TV?
- Yes, Eve, I'm watching it too.
Yes, I know.
- Curfew.
- Hello, hello?
- Hey, Presidente, silence is golden, no?
Don't tell me you didn't enjoy this just a little bit.
I mean, if your wife's anything like your daughter,
she's sweet to eat, but you just can't shut her up.
- [Utopia] Hey, knock it off, Cuervo.
- All right, now this is set.
We shut down the entire United States.
I want a police chopper to come and get me
at the Happy Kingdom no later than 5:00 AM.
Once I'm airborne, you'll get your orders.
Remember, don't piss me off, or I'll pull the plug.
- I'm at the mercy of this madman.
- Don't count Plissken out, sir.
- He's tanked, he's a POW.
- But he's still alive.
(dramatic theme music)
(crowd shouting)
(crowd shouting in foreign language)
(dramatic theme music)
(grunting)
(crowd clamoring)
(blades clashing)
- [Crowd] 10, nine, eight, seven, six,
five, four, three, two, one.
(buzzer sounding)
- [Announcer] Shot clock!
(automatic guns firing)
(audience cheering)
- Get him, get him up.
(audience cheering)
- But this is insane.
- It is.
That's the point.
(woman screaming)
- Aah, yah!
Yah!
(audience jeering)
- All right, all right.
Hey!
(feedback sounding)
I promised you tonight was gonna be special.
I also promised you one last great spectacle of death here
in this historic arena.
Now you will see that death.
I give you
the death of Snake Plissken!
(audience cheering)
(audience cheering and clamoring)
Some people think you're already dead, Snake.
Some say you never will be.
'Cause you may have survived Cleveland,
you may have escaped from New York,
but this is LA, vato.
And you're about to find out that this fucking city
can kill anybody!
- [Audience] LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA,
LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA, LA,
LA, LA, LA, LA,
- Game time!
Basketball.
Two hoops, full court.
- 10 second shot clock.
Miss a shot, you get shot.
Shot clock buzzer goes off before you shoot, you get shot.
Two points for a basket, no three-point bullshit.
All you got to do is make points, that's it.
By the way, nobody's ever walked off that court alive.
Nobody.
(audience cheering)
(beeping)
All right!
(buzzer sounding)
- [Crowd] Eight, seven, six, five, four,
three, two, one!
(crowd jeering)
Ten, nine, eight, seven, six,
five, four,
three, two, one!
(buzzer sounding)
Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four,
three, two, one!
(buzzer sounding)
(crowd jeering)
Ten, nine, eight, seven--
- Nice shot.
- He's getting tired now.
- [Crowd] Four, three, two, one.
(buzzer sounding)
(dramatic theme music)
(Snake panting)
(Snake grunting)
(audience chattering)
- [Audience] Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake,
Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake,
Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake!
- This town loves a winner.
- [Audience] Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake,
Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake,
Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake,
Snake, Snake, Snake!
- He won, Cuervo.
(cocking gun)
- [Audience] Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake!
- You can't kill him.
- I have to.
- Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake!
Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake!
(gun firing)
- Get off!
- Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake, Snake!
- [Henchmen] Free shot!
- It's the big one!
(gun firing)
- Find him!
We're gonna Anaheim.
Come here.
- [Eddie] Cuervo, Cuervo, wait up.
Give me a minute.
- Get lost, agent!
- Come on, we got a relationship here, man.
- Let me make something clear to you.
I'm starting to get irritated, and that's not a good thing.
- [Eddie] Irritated with me, Cuervo, I'm taking care of you.
I'm with you in all this, don't you understand?
- We can't find him, Cuervo.
- So keep looking!
(suspenseful theme music)
(men shouting)
Get in the car.
If I'm being too rough on you, you just let me know, OK?
(loud exploding)
(suspenseful theme music)
- Snake, wait, don't shoot, it's me, Utopia.
I'm alone.
This whole place is a nightmare.
Cuervo's a killer.
He's worse than my father.
I want to go back with you.
(cocking gun)
Oh, my God.
My father sent you to kill me, didn't he?
(sobbing)
- Shit.
Get out of here.
(Snake coughing)
Go.
- Wait, you can't take that back, Snake.
Oh, God, you can't give that to him.
All he wants to do is control everything, just like Cuervo.
- If I don't take it back, I'm dead.
(rumbling)
- Oh, not another one!
(gun firing)
(Snake grunting)
- Run!
(glass shattering)
- It's over.
Get me a complete damage report as soon as possible.
- Yes, sir.
- Oh, thank God Almighty.
Maybe that's the answer to all of our problems.
Maybe,
maybe they're all dead.
- Maybe.
(background shouting)
- Oh, Cuervo, man!
We almost bought the farm.
The whole place just fell in right behind us.
- Where is Plissken?
- He's down there, he's dead.
He's history, and I did it, I killed him, I shot him.
Right, tell him.
- Give it to me.
- Oh, yeah.
I brought it back to you, Cuervo.
It's all there.
(upbeat rock music)
♪ Whoa ♪
- Whoa, dude, is that you, Snake?
Far out, man.
Hey, did you find Cuervo, man?
- Hey, Cuervo, wait, I've done it all, man.
I killed Plissken, I got your girl back.
I gave you all the marbles, just for you, Cuervo.
- So where is he?
- I shot him.
He went down, OK?
I mean, his body's probably washed down
into Wilshire Canyon somewhere.
- Good, so then you know where he is.
Bring me his head.
- Where's the Happy Kingdom?
- Anaheim.
It's the staging area for the big invasion.
The whole town's gonna be there, except me.
I'm staying right here, man, I'm ready for the big wave.
It's gonna be some eternal one.
- [Snake] Take me there.
- What?
- [Snake] Take me there!
- Hey, you're not doing so well, Snake.
You need help, here.
Hold on.
(Snake groaning)
- Who shot you?
- It doesn't matter.
- Well, yeah, you're right.
You know, you should talk to Hershe,
she hates Cuervo, big-time.
They used to be partners, and they split up.
- Who?
- Hershe.
She lives downtown in a big boat, down that way.
She hangs with Saigon Shadow.
Man, they don't take shit from nobody.
(waves crashing)
- [Snake] What is that?
- Tsunami, Snake, Tsunami, whoo!
Surf's up big-time now, mister, ha ha!
Start feeling better quick, man,
'cause you ain't got time to get out of here.
This is gonna be some kind of ride, man.
Some kind of bitchin' ride, let's go, come on.
Whoo, bitchin'.
Bitchin', man.
OK.
Let the front edge pick you up.
Don't get on your board till you ride to the top.
Don't blow it, if you fall off the board,
it's the big one, got it?
Whoo!
Bitchin'.
Hang on, Snake, whoo!
(upbeat rock music)
- You got to be kidding me.
- Later.
- Ooh, Snake, aha!
(upbeat rock music)
(bystanders shouting)
(horn honking repeatedly)
(tires squealing)
- You're gonna tell me how to get downtown,
somebody named Hershe.
- Yeah, sure, Snake, no problem.
- Hey, hey!
- Are you gonna kill me?
- Hershe.
- Right, keep going straight, two blocks down, make a right.
(tires squealing)
- [Computer] Warning, neuro-system shutdown, one hour.
(dramatic theme music)
- I first met Hershe when I got deported.
She helped set me up in business.
We're talking a power player, Snake.
Cuervo's got the numbers and the firepower,
but Hershe's got a burning spine made out of steel.
Big-time fast-lane ambitions.
Think about it, the two of you hooked up together,
I'm talking box-office material here.
What?
Easy, Snake, I see him, too.
We're OK, come on.
Yeah, she's gonna love you, Snake.
You're gonna love her, too.
We're gonna make this thing happen.
By the way, I'm through with Cuervo.
The guy's got no sense of loyalty whatsoever.
Right through here.
- [Man At Door] What?
- Hey, man, how you doing, long time, no see.
Remember me, Map to the Stars Eddie.
Yeah, well, I got somebody I want Hershe to meet.
Snake Plissken, baby, right here in the flesh.
- [Man At Door] Your gun.
- Great, thanks, pal.
All right, we're in, strange scene in here.
Let me do the talking.
(Snake coughing)
Hey, Hershe, how you doin'?
Hang on, hang on, guys, this is big, it's Snake Plissken.
I brought him here to see you, Hershe.
He's got a little business proposition.
- What's in it for me?
- Well-- - Wait a minute.
I know that voice.
Yeah, you're Carjack Malone.
- Not anymore.
- [Eddie] You two know each other?
- Well, the more things change, the more they stay
the same, huh, Carjack?
Glad to see you're still packing a gun between your legs.
- Hold on, honey.
- You owe me.
You bolted on me back in Cleveland.
- Hershe, you were in Cleveland?
- Oh, yeah, with me and Texas Mike O'Shay,
except you looked a little different
in those days, Carjack.
- You get one thing straight, Plissken.
I'm no longer Carjack Malone.
I'm Hershe Las Palmas, the most drop-dead, to-die-for number
you ever laid that one eye on.
- I don't give a fuck what you are.
I want to know what the hell happened to you in Cleveland.
- I was called away on urgent business.
I got caught, and you didn't.
- Don't lie to me!
- All right, so I made another deal.
I got my ass kicked, not you.
I've been here five years, not you.
- I got a new deal for you.
You help me, you live.
- I wouldn't do that, Snake.
You see, we all have an agreement.
Anything happens to me, and you're dead.
- I'm already dead.
(coughing)
- I see your point, what's the deal?
- [Snake] Get me to Cuervo Jones, I got one hour.
- Oh dream on, blue eye.
- Say good night, Carjack.
- Hold on!
Cuervo Jones has more firepower than two armies.
No one gets near him.
- And he's got the black box and the girl.
He's running the show.
- [Hershe] What black box?
- The one that shuts down the power permanently.
- Oh, yeah, right, and the Plutoxin Seven virus
is gonna kill you in less than 10 hours, oh!
- What?
- It's bullshit, baby, rumor control, government propaganda.
Just one more lie.
- Snake's telling the truth, Hershe.
I used to represent the guy who invented it.
Swear to God, Snake.
- Hey, hey, what's the deal, gorgeous?
- We get the girl and the black box,
and we get out of here.
- All of us?
- Yeah.
- Me, too?
- Ha, why should we leave, I love LA.
Where we gonna go, what's the big payoff?
- The President's promised to give
whoever helps me a million dollars.
- Oh, yeah, a million greenbacks?
I got 10 million of them in the next room.
- Uh-uh.
Bluebacks.
- Oh, come on, Snake.
- Bluebacks, I swear to God, Eddie.
This is bigger than Cleveland.
- It sounds thin to me.
- You want to stay here while Cuervo Jones rules the world?
- Hell no, that sucks.
So how are we gonna get out?
- I'll tell you that when we get there.
- Oh, Plissken, now, you are such a loser!
Man, making up shit along the way.
That's why I left your ass in Cleveland.
You're just a chump just like the rest of us, no deal!
- Government chopper.
It'll be there.
- OK, that's better.
So how are we getting there in under an hour?
- That's your end.
(coughing)
- Edward.
- The best you could do from here is take the five.
The shape it's in, 2 1/2 hours minimum.
- No, use the air, they're burning.
The Santa Anas.
The night wind.
- What are you talking about?
- Death from above.
(dramatic theme music)
(background chattering)
- I don't know about these things.
- [Hershe] You don't like it, don't come.
- Where'd you get these rigs, Carjack?
- My name is Hershe, do you understand, Plissken?
- I got an idea.
Got any red nail polish on you?
- What?
- Come on.
(device beeping)
- [Hershe] I expect that back, Eddie.
- Yeah, yeah.
There.
It looks just like the sword of Damocles instruction CD.
Maybe we can pull a Texas switch on Cuervo.
- Yeah, if he lets you get close enough.
- Don't worry.
- [Gang Member] Let's do it!
- The wind's up, come on, let's go!
Woo-hoo!
- Ah!
- [Computer] Neurosystem shutdown, 34 minutes.
(crowd shouting and clamoring)
(upbeat music)
(crowd shouting and clamoring)
(automatic guns firing)
- [Crowd] Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo!
Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo!
Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo, Cuervo!
- Are you ready for the new world?
(audience cheering)
The attack is now under way!
(automatic guns firing)
(suspenseful theme music)
- What's going on?
- [Pilot] I don't know, I think we're fucked!
(crowd clamoring)
- Get out here!
Get out of there!
- You see Plissken anywhere?
- [Computer] Neurosystem shutdown, 25 minutes.
(crowd clamoring)
Get my jet ready.
Get it fueled and ready to go.
- You can't run away now, it's too late.
You have to stay and face it down.
- Mr. President, Commander, we are receiving
reports from Miami.
An armada of warships has just departed Cuba.
ETA the Florida coast in 45 minutes.
- They're starting the invasion.
- I've got to go to my quarters!
I've got to pray!
- Go with him, make sure he doesn't do anything crazy.
(suspenseful theme music)
(clock beeping)
- Hey, Eddie, is that what I think it is?
- Yeah, the place kept changing owners.
Finally went bankrupt.
That thing in Paris killed them.
- We're gonna need some kind of diversion.
- Let's go.
- Hey, Cuervo, hey!
Hey, Cuervo, I made it!
I made it, wait for me, whoa!
Oh, shit!
(Eddie grunting)
(crowd chattering)
Hey, Cuervo!
- Will you please kill him for me?
- Hey, hey, I got news!
There's about to be an attack!
You're about to get hit, man.
It's Plissken.
- Plissken?
You told me that you shot him dead.
- Yeah, I thought I did, but I found him sort of alive.
- Sort of, where?
- Oh, Cuervo.
- [Cuervo] What?
- It's so good to see you.
- Where is Plissken?
- [Eddie] He's near.
- You're stalling, Eddie.
- Ah, jeez!
- Talk, gringo, or I'll rip your balls off.
- Oh, look out behind you!
(men shouting)
(men chattering)
- You have lied to me for the very last time.
(loud exploding)
(woman screaming)
(crowd clamoring)
(guns firing)
(suspenseful theme music)
(guns firing)
(guns firing)
(suspenseful theme music)
(grunting)
(guns firing)
(Snake shouting in pain)
(suspenseful theme music)
(crowd screaming)
(automatic guns firing)
(suspenseful theme music)
(automatic guns firing)
- Come on, hurry up, let's go!
(automatic guns firing)
- Get inside the chopper, it's bulletproof.
I'll take my coat back now, asshole.
- Take me back, Snake.
- Secure the latch.
- Oh, you got the remote, great.
- Yeah, now give me the real one.
- What, I didn't make a switch.
- Yes, you did, I saw you.
- Give me that gun!
Ah!
(dramatic theme music)
- Carjack, we're hooked up on your side.
(suspenseful theme music)
- I hit him!
(Eddie giggling)
Oh, whoa!
(screaming)
(suspenseful theme music)
Hey!
Get back here, Plissken!
- [Officer] Aircraft is entering quadrant four, sir.
I'm getting radio contact.
- Boost it.
- Malloy.
Get the antidote ready, assholes, I'm coming in.
- This is Malloy, Plissken, do you have the back box?
- I got what was in it.
Remote control unit and instruction disk.
Get the trucks rolling, we're on fire.
- [Computer] Neurosystem shutdown,
two minutes and 27 seconds.
- [PA] All emergency vehicles proceed
to the north perimeter.
- Shit, Shit!
(suspenseful theme music)
- [PA] This is a full alert.
- Where the hell is he going?
- Get ready to jump.
Head for the tree line and disappear.
Go.
Go!
(suspenseful theme music)
- [Utopia] Oh!
Oh!
(Utopia grunting)
(suspenseful theme music)
(men chattering)
(Snake coughing)
- Oh, oh, thank God Almighty!
Thank God Almighty!
Welcome back, Snake.
- Give me the goddamn shot.
(beeping)
- [Computer] Your countdown clock
has now terminated function.
Your time is up.
(chuckling)
- I told you he was dumb.
- You took the fake, hotshot.
- Plutoxin Seven is a fast, hard-hitting case of the flu.
- Pretty good.
- Relax, war hero, we took you for a little ride,
and you came through.
Now, give me that unit.
- You want this thing?
Come and get it.
- Sir.
- What can he do?
- Let go of me, quit it!
- You didn't finish the mission, Snake.
Looks like I'll have to do it for you.
- Hold it, Mr. President.
- Shit.
- We'll take this one.
- Get her out of here.
- Daddy.
- Take her to the chair.
For he so loved his country,
he gave his only seditious child.
Prepare to broadcast worldwide.
Worldwide!
- She didn't know that she had that remote unit
in her pocket, now, did she?
I was wondering what kind of lame switch
you'd try to pull this time, Plissken.
You know, you're becoming very predictable.
- Yeah, I guess so.
- You got a smoke?
- The United States is a nonsmoking nation.
No smoking, no drinking, no drugs, no women.
Unless, of course, you're married.
No guns, no foul language, no red meat.
- The land of the free.
- I don't need the teleprompter.
This is the President of the United States.
I now demand an immediate retreat of all forces
now threatening this great nation.
If my demand is not met immediately,
I will destroy your ability to function permanently.
- Mr. President, the Cuban Theater
of Aggression remains mobile.
ETA, Miami in four minutes.
- Four minutes.
Bring the aiming coordinates for Cuba and Mexico on line.
- Cuba, seven, seven, nine.
- Seven.
Seven.
Nine.
I now render this final solution.
- [Eddie] Welcome to your very own map to the stars.
Sure, we all know the big one wiped out
the entertainment industry here in LA,
but the glamor and excitement of Hollywood is still alive.
- Very funny.
- Yeah.
- I hope it was worth it,
for now you are going to die.
- Everybody does.
- Kill him and bring me the real unit.
- Sir, we're still broadcasting.
- Good, let them watch!
Do it!
Do it!
- On my command!
Fire!
- He's not even here, he's a hologram!
- Catches on quick, doesn't she?
- Got to be within a half-mile radius.
Round up every available man.
- Hold it.
- [Brazen] Sir, the enemy is less than two minutes
from our shore.
- What's it to be, Plissken, us or them?
- Shut down the Third World, they lose, you win.
Shut down America, you lose, they win.
The more things change, the more they stay the same.
- So what are you going to do?
- Disappear.
(device beeping)
- He's entered the word code.
No target code.
Sir, that will shut down the entire planet.
- I told you you'd better hope I didn't make it back.
- You push that button, everything we've accomplished
for the past 500 years will be finished.
Our technology, our way of life, our entire history.
We'll have to start all over again.
For God sakes, don't do it, Snake!
- The name's Plissken.
(bluesy band music)
- He did it, he shut down the Earth.
(bluesy band music)
(sparking match)
- [Snake] Welcome to the human race.
(upbeat rock music)
♪ I been around and I been high ♪
♪ Piled into dreams in a supersonic eye ♪
♪ And now is the time ♪
♪ I just got a future right ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ Stronger than you and every mother's son ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ King of the world and the devil's son ♪
♪ Yeah yeah ♪
(upbeat hard rock theme)
♪ I am a liar I cross my face ♪
♪ I'm picking out stiffs for the human race ♪
♪ And when I die ♪
♪ I'll never doubt or wonder why ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ Stronger than you and every mother's son ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ King of the world and the devil's son ♪
♪ Yeah yeah ♪
(hard rock music)
♪ Run baby run baby run away ♪
♪ Run baby run escapin' LA ♪
(hard rock music)
♪ The one you love the people you know ♪
♪ Want to go have atomic flow ♪
♪ Hollywood ♪
♪ Demon red ♪
♪ American dreams aglow in my head ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ Stronger than you and every mother's son ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ King of the world and the devil's son ♪
♪ Yeah yeah ♪
(hard rock music)
♪ Run baby run baby run away ♪
♪ Run baby run escapin' LA ♪
♪ Run baby run baby run away ♪
♪ Run baby run escapin' LA ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ Run baby run escapin' LA ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ Run baby run escapin' LA ♪
♪ Yeah I am the one ♪
♪ Run baby run escapin' LA ♪
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