All language subtitles for Orange.Is.The.New.Black.S01E01.720p.BrRip.x264-@iMediaShare

I've always loved getting clean.

I love baths.

I love showers.

It's my happy place.

Was my happy place.

All inmates in D dorm
must be checked for lice.

Repeat, all inmates in D
dorm must be checked for lice.

Oh, I'll be out in a sec. I swear.

I'll wait. There best
be some hot water left.

There wasn't very much when I started.

Man, hurry!

All right, okay, okay.

I'm done. I'm out. I'm totally out.

Damn, you got some nice titties.

- Thank you.
- You got them TV titties.

They stand up on they own
all perky and everything.

Okay.

You know they sell
flip-flops at the commissary.

My money's not in yet, so.

You creative. I give you that, high-tits.

Now get the fuck out the way.

Okay.

-== [ www.OpenSubtitles.com ] ==-

So, there's an entire pig in there?

Yes.

For four of us?

It's a small pig. I really
wanted to use the box.

It was my birthday present.

She's guilty she's leaving.

It's a guilt pig-roasting box.

At least you get something.

I'm not getting laid for a
year, too, but what do I get?

A baby?

But you can't eat it.

- Are we really gonna eat that?
- It's thematic.

You're not serving time in Cuba.

Pigs. Cops.

How the fuck are you
going to jail tomorrow?

Prison, not jail.

You're missing my shower.

Polly, I'm really sorry.

I know.

You focus on how you're gonna
maintain your eyebrows behind bars.

You may not come back with a unibrow.

Am I allowed to cry?

No. Seriously, no.

Okay, we are ready. Everybody inside.

- Need a hoist?
- Yeah.

Big girl.

On to the last supper.

- We got to do it.
- I know.

God, we really should
not have eaten so much.

I know. Come on, we gotta rally.

Okay.

- Make some memories, you know?
- Yeah.

You need spank-bank material.

Oh, well, I mean, when
you say it like that.

- Wait, I got...
- What?

- I gotta pee.
- What? No.

- Yeah.
- Really?

I just...

I'll be... I'll be right back.

Hey.

Yeah?

You look beautiful.

Thanks.

Oh, shit.

What?

You look beautiful, too.

Come on. Get in.

Hey. You're crying.

Just fuck me.

Piper.

Shut up.

Please. Please.

Okay.

No visiting today.

Hi, um, I'm here to surrender.

Oh, okay, then.

Did he look surprised to you?

When I said that I was here to
surrender? Didn't he look surprised?

Like, "What the hell is she doing here?"

- I didn't notice.
- Well, he looked surprised to me.

I look like shit. My eyes are all puffy.

You're worried about how you look?

Well, they're gonna know that I was crying.

It's a sign of weakness.
You can't show any weakness.

That's what all of the books said.

Oh, sweetie...

Don't call me sweetie.

Oh, Leonard.

That's better.

I can't take it with me.

Oh, okay. Right.

What are you doing?

What?

You can't put that in your pocket.

It's gonna end up at the
bottom of the washing machine.

Okay. Um...

Where would you like me
to put it then, Piper?

Up your ass.

There's no room. Apparently,
my head's already up there.

I'm sorry.

It's okay.

You know what?

I'm gonna put it in my wallet. Okay?

And when I get home, I will
put it in your jewelry box.

Until I'm short on
rent, then I may hock it.

But I'll try to get it
back before you're out.

We should go.

Okay.

Okay.

Self-surrender.

Yeah, well, no one told me either.

Available guards...

Got the paperwork right here.

Name is Chapman.

Yeah. Chap, like when your lips
get all dry they're chapped.

Have a seat.

Piper. Rhymes with sniper.

Inmate Robinson to the visitor area.

You hungry?

Not really.

Guard Thomson to the tower.

Eat anyway.

It's burrata.

Thank you.

My mother told her friends I'm
doing volunteer work in Africa.

I bet they're all appalled that you've
gone somewhere so filthy and dangerous.

So I never carried drugs. Just money.

You were a lesbian?

At the time.

You still a lesbian?

No, I'm not still a lesbian.

You sure?

I once kissed Mary Straley when
I was at Miss Porter's school.

But it wasn't for me.

Wow.

Did you know about all this?

No. No, no, I didn't.

I mean, she told me how
she traveled after college,

but she failed to mention the lesbian lover

who ran an international
drug smuggling ring.

Imagine my surprise.

What on earth did you do with the money?

Well, Grandmother, I wasn't
really in it for the money.

Oh, Piper, for heaven's sake!

So this is my last post as a free woman.

- What are you gonna write?
- Hey!

Oh, no. You cannot have a phone in here.

This is a federal facility.
You have to take that out.

Oh, can I? Am I allowed to go out?

He can take it out.

So no phone?

- You knew that.
- Now.

Oh, my God, Larry, by the time I get out

there'll have been, like, three
new generations of iPhones.

Sir, I can get an
officer to escort you out.

No, I'm going. It's okay, I'm going,
okay? I'll be right back, okay?

I'll take the phone to the
car, I'll be right back.

Okay? Two seconds.

- Yeah?
- Okay.

Two seconds.

- Chapman!
- Yes.

Yes, that's me. But you have to wait.

You're telling me what I have to do?

Get your ass over here,
Chapman, now. Move it.

He's, he's gonna be right back.

We've been waiting here for two hours.

And the wait is over.

Here's your temporary ID,

you'll stick this on your uniform
when we get to that. Now...

- Here. I'm here. Here I am.
- Here he is.

- Who's this?
- My fianc�.

Yeah? Good luck with that.

Excuse me?

- Any personal items?
- Here.

You can't take this check.

But we called last week.
And they told me to bring it.

He has to send it to Iowa.

It takes a few weeks to process.

A few weeks? Doesn't
she need to buy things?

How it is.

Where do we send it?

Hey, you got that Iowa address?

Any Nudie Judies in here?
Skin pics? Naughty stuff?

No. No Nudie Judies.

Time to say goodbye. It might be
a while till you can visit, fianc�.

I love you so much.

I love you, too!

- I'll call you as soon as I can.
- Okay.

Okay? Please send that check immediately.

Okay. I will.

I love you. Please keep my website updated.

I love you so much.

It's okay.

It's okay.

- What size shoe are you?
- Nine and a half, ten.

These are kinda like Toms.

- Who's Tom?
- Toms are shoes.

When you buy a pair, the company
gives another to a child in need.

They're great. And they come in
lots of different colors and...

How nice.

Strip.

Get over here.

Come here.

Are you gonna miss me?

Yes.

Too much.

Come with me.

What?

Come to Bali.

Come with me. I mean it.
I'll buy you a plane ticket.

Are you serious?

Yes.

Come with me. Quit your job. Come with me.

Well, I'd have to give notice.

You're a fucking waitress. You
don't need to give a notice.

Will I get in trouble?

God, I hope so.

You know what I mean.

You don't have to do anything.

You're just there to keep
me company, all right?

Come on, babe. I want you to come.

And I want you to come.

Yes? Is that a yes?

Yes.

Yes.

Open your mouth, stick out your tongue.

Inmates, an updated facility rules with

inmate discipline list
is posted in the day room.

Lift up your arms.

Turn around.

Squat.

Spread your cheeks and cough.

Seriously?

That it?

One more coming, hold on.

My zipper's broken.

First time down?

My first time here?

Oh, no, your first time in prison?

Oh, yeah.

It's not so bad. Everyone's okay.

You've gotta watch out for the stealing.

So, what's your name? Your last name.

Everyone uses last names here.

I'm Morello and that is Watson.

Chapman.

And how much time you got, Chapman?

Fifteen months.

Oh, that's not so bad. I got 34,

but I'm hoping with
good time it'll be less.

You... so you're a... they let you drive?

Well, who else is gonna do it?

We do everything around here.

Hey, can I ask you something?
You look like you'd know.

All right, which dress you like better?

My top two faves are the ones

with the half-and-half
lids stuck to the pages.

See, I want something that's
gonna express my personality.

And the trick is, I wanna
show off the boobs and the ass,

but I'm not so happy with the
upper arms and the stomach,

so there's the challenge.

Both nice.

That's all you gotta say?

I gotta look good. My first
dance is gonna go on YouTube.

Look! I found a rock that looks
like a penis with one ball.

- No.
- It's my Lance Armstrong rock.

Hold it up. Let me see, let me see. Nice.

Okay, now lick it, softly and tenderly,

like you would've when
you thought he was clean.

Oh, Jesus! Shut that thing off.

You're making a huge
mistake. This could go viral.

Seriously, shut it off.

- What?
- I'm so fat from all the stress-eating.

I really don't want a record of it.

You know, that's one thing
I'm gonna do in prison.

I'm gonna get ripped.

Like Jackie Warner ripped.

And I'm gonna read everything
on my Amazon wish list.

And maybe even learn a craft,
you know? I could be crafty.

I'm gonna make it count, Larry.

I'm not gonna throw away a year of my life.

What the hell are you looking for?

Oh, no!

What is that?

Piper...

Oh, Jesus, Larry. Why would you want...

Why would I want a felonious,
former lesbian, WASP-shiksa

who's about to go to prison, to marry me?

Yes. And all of the stress-eating?

Well, because this peculiar,

underachieving, underemployed
Jew-boy loves her.

And knows that he will never be bored,

and can't believe how
lucky he is that he met her.

I gotta lock this shit down
before you leave, Pipes.

I love you.

You wanna marry me?

When I get out, right?

Whenever you want.

I'll be so ripped.

You could wear a wedding dress
that's like a half-shirt, you know?

Show off those abs.

Yeah!

Was it your grandmother's?

No, my mom's saving that one for my sister.

This is my great-aunt Marcia's.

She had thyroid cancer

and a series of schnauzers, all
named Schnapps. That's all I know.

Put it on. I had it sized. Good.

It's beautiful.

And that's a "yes," right?

Yes.

Yeah.

Will you say that just
one more time for me?

But, this time, just into the camera, okay?

Oh, you asshole!

- Come on, I had to capture the moment.
- Shit. Turn it off!

- What?
- Give me that!

Oh, you're cold. Come here.

Bounce your legs up and
down. It keeps your feet warm.

Thanks.

You think your man is still
gonna be around when you're out?

Yeah, he'll be there.
I'm the love of his life.

Thirty-four months is a long time.

Yeah, but she's the love of his life!

And who the fuck asked you?

Head on up.

All the gates open to one and two.

All right, so his tie is gonna
match the bridesmaids' dresses.

There's six bridesmaids.

My cousin's being a bitch, so
I'm thinking about dropping her.

All right, let's go.

Hello, Miss Claudette.

Morello.

Watch out for that one.

Don't get me wrong, she's a good lady,

but you don't wanna get on her bad side.

Go ahead. Go.

Okay, I'm gonna send you
all through to processing,

you'll get your room assignments,

and I'll meet you back here
and show you your bunks. Okay?

Don't look so bummed.
Gonna get the wrinkles.

All right, raise your
head and look at the lens.

Oh, crap!

New guy, what's your name, Bennett?

Bennett, it's not fucking working again.

- You turn it on?
- Yeah, I turned it on.

Wait, I think I got it. Ready?

Yeah. Yep.

Wait, no.

- What does this button do?
- No! Don't touch that.

Sorry, princess.

There's a cord right there.

Do you think that that needs
to be connected to something?

Shut your mouth and stand still.

- She's right.
- Okay, fine.

Got it.

I wasn't ready.

Tough shit. Next.

This is a TB test. Nice veins.

- No track marks.
- Thanks.

Tattoos?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, a fish. You like fish?

Saw it on a scuba diving trip.

Thought it was beautiful.

I don't like fish. I like pork,
chicken. But it's a pretty fish.

Thanks.

It's gonna rub off when I sweat.

No, it won't. It's waterproof. Stop.

So, when this dries,
you should be good to go.

How am I gonna get it off?

Acetone.

Great. Alex, I don't,
I don't know if I can...

Hey.

Hey, hey, hey.

You are a nice blonde lady, aren't you?

A proper young lady.

Just picking up her sensible
bag in the baggage claim

before heading off to her mid-range
hotel to go over her schedules.

Museum visits and fancy dinners.

It's all fine. It's all good.

And I will meet you in Brussels,

and everything will
work out perfectly, babe.

I promise.

It's all gonna be okay.

Are you okay?

Fine. I guess.

What's PoPi?

Poppy.

It's a bath products line I'd
started with my friend, Polly.

Polly and Piper. PoPi.
We're gonna be in Barneys.

Barneys?

It's a nice store.

It's a pretty big case.
Criminal conspiracy.

That's what they charged me with.

I carried a suitcase of money.

Drug money. Once.

Ten years ago.

What's the statute of limitations on that?

Twelve years.

That's tough.

Well,

I did it, that one time, 10 years ago.

What did your lawyer say?

He said with the mandatory
minimums with drug crimes,

he wouldn't recommend risking
a trial. So, I pleaded out.

And here you are.

Here I am.

Costing the tax payers money
and sweating in my armchair.

You know, I've been here for 22 years,

and I still can't figure
out how the system works.

I got a crack dealer
who is doing nine months,

and then I have a lady who
accidently backed into a mailman

who is doing four years.

I mean, the guy broke his
collar bone, but come on.

I just don't get it.

Are you gonna barf?

Tell me if you're gonna barf.

Because there's a can behind you.

I won't barf.

I will be truly displeased if
you barf anywhere but in that can.

Not gonna barf.

Miss Chapman,

no one's gonna mess with
you here unless you let them.

This isn't Oz.

Women fight with gossip and rumors.

They might peg you for rich and
try to hit you up for commissary.

And there are lesbians.

They're not gonna bother you.

They'll try to be your friend,

just stay away from them.

I want you to understand, you
do not have to have lesbian sex.

I have a fianc�.

His name is Larry.

He's a writer.

Can he come visit me?

- Is he in here?
- Yes. Everybody's in there.

All the people in the
PSI are cleared to visit.

He can come this weekend.

I'll make sure the list
is in the visiting room.

Thank you so much, Mr. Healy.

You just keep to yourself.
And you'll be fine.

And don't make friends.

And remember, nothing goes on
here that I don't know about.

You know everything about
me! I tell you everything!

The webcam horror, the
penis shaving incident.

How do I not know this?

What was I supposed to say? It was...

It was a phase.

It was my lost-soul,
post-college adventure phase.

I was so embarrassed. I can't
believe that she did this.

I can't believe you did this.

I mean, who are you?

I feel like I'm in a Bourne
movie. Have you killed?

Oh, Jesus. Oh, no. Baby. Stop. Stop, stop.

Come on. Come on.

Okay.

You should break up with me.

- What?
- You didn't sign up for this.

Okay, stop it. Stop it.
Come on. Shh. It's okay.

Okay?

Okay?

"Witness states, Piper
Chapman carried drug money.

"Piper Chapman was part of the ring."

Were you?

I was 22.

I thought that I was in love.

I was in love.

And it was all crazy.

And then it got scary,

and I ran away,

and I became the nice blonde
lady that I was supposed to be.

I knew that she wasn't a
good person, but fuck her!

Fuck her! This is not gonna be okay.

- No.
- No.

It's not.

But we'll deal with it, okay?

We'll figure it out.

Have you called a lawyer?

- No.
- I'll call my dad.

No! No. Please don't call
your dad. He already hates me.

Yeah, well, I love you.

And, and he loves me, so, here we go.

All right, we gotta hustle,
'cause the count's soon.

Uh, rooms are there. Dorms are down there.

Now, you are not allowed down there.

It's out of bounds for you guys
until you get assigned there.

You understand?

Namaste, Jones!

Namaste!

She teaches yoga if you ever want.

And she's good. She's very spiritual.

All right, we got some offices here.

This is the dining hall,
common room, counselor's office.

Who you got for a counselor?

Uh, Healy.

Okay. Yeah.

What?

Nah, it's fine. It's fine. He does
his paperwork. That's a good thing.

When do we get outfits like everybody?

I don't know. Maybe
tomorrow after breakfast.

You go down, you speak to the lady...

What the fuck?

Friend of yours?

No. It's my mom.

All right, Chapman, Diaz, this is you.

DeMarco, this is Chapman. She's new.

Self-surrender. You show her what's what?

Sure.

Okay, Mendoza, this is Diaz.
Go, go. She'll help you.

Um, I don't speak Spanish.

Great. Another fucking coconut.

What's the matter with your
mother, she don't teach you Spanish?

Here. Here's some tissues.
First night's always hard.

And a toothbrush. They don't give you one.

Thank you. Thank you so much.
Thank you for everything.

No, no. It's no problem.
We look out for our own.

Our own?

Oh, don't get all PC on me. It's
tribal, not racist. I'll see you around.

Tell me your name again?

Piper. Chapman.

That's Miss Rosa.

And that's Nichols. Just
got out of SHU a week ago.

Told a CO to kiss her ass. Dumb.

Why make trouble for yourself, you know?

SHU. That's solitary?

Yep. And you don't want
it, honey. Trust me.

Here's some toilet paper.
You gotta take it with you.

Thanks. What's that thing?

Oh, that's my machine. I need it at night.

When I first got here, I
had a massive heart attack.

Do you know about the count?

Wait, can you go back to the heart attack?

I don't like to dwell.

How do I make a phone call?

You need a PAC number. Fill
out a form. Whole rigmarole.

But maybe Caputo will
let you make a call later.

It helps if you cry.

Don't make your bed!

What?

We'll make it for you.

Oh, no, that's okay. You
don't need to do that.

Honey!

We'll make the bed.

We know how.

I know how to make a bed.

We know how to do it so
we'll pass inspection.

You can help clean. We clean
everything with Maxi Pads.

Seriously?

Yep. It's a head-scratcher,
but that's what we got.

So, we make our beds in
the morning before they...

No. You sleep on top of the
bed. With a blanket over you.

What if I want to sleep in the bed?

Look, you can do what you want,

but you will be the only one
in this entire prison that does.

You want that? Be my guest.

Count time! Count time! Count time, ladies!

That light comes on, you need to
be where you're supposed to be,

and you don't move until
it goes off. Dinner's after.

Hey, blanca. You speak Spanish?

Un poco. Entiendo mas
de lo que puedo hablar.

You see, fucking white girl speaks Spanish.

So?

Shh. Wait.

Dinner's at 4:30?

Recount, ladies!

They always screw it up.

How hard is it to fucking count?

Nicky, this is uh...

Piper. Uh, Chapman.

Look at you, blondie. What'd you do?

Aren't you not supposed
to ask that question?

I read that you're not
supposed to ask that.

You read that?

What, you studied for prison?

What did you do?

I can't understand your French.

Mon bag! Bag!

My bag hasn't arrived.

Oh! The bags do not make it
onto the right flight sometime.

Wait for the next shuttle from Paris.

It's probably on that plane.

Mon bag!

My bag.

- Bonjour.
- Oh! Bonjour.

Welcome to Belgium. All good?

I was starting to worry.
Where did you come from?

Over there.

You didn't go through customs?

No, I just walked out of that
door and it brought me right here.

You skipped customs?
Holy shit! It's genius.

- Well, should I go back?
- Fuck, no. We're going to the hotel.

I'm gonna eat you for dinner.

Alex, I was so freaked out when the
bag didn't show up, I almost bailed.

Well, it's good thing you didn't.

There's over 50 grand in that bag.

Kubra would have had you killed. Come on.

Keep moving. You're blocking up the works.

Okay, go sit there.
She's a nice white lady.

Thanks.

Hi.

It's okay if I sit here?

Sure, newbie.

I'm Jones.

Chapman.

You doing okay, Chapman?

I don't really know how
to answer that question.

Everything's pretty surreal right now.

Do you know what a mandala is?

Um...

Those are those round Buddhist art things.

The Tibetan monks make
them out of dyed sand

laid out into big, beautiful designs.

And when they're done,
after days or weeks of work,

they wipe it all away.

Wow. That's a lot.

Try to look at your experience
here as a mandala, Chapman.

Work hard to make something as
meaningful and beautiful as you can.

And when you're done, pack it
in and know it was all temporary.

You have to remember
that. It's all temporary.

It's all temporary.

I'm telling you. Surviving
here is all about perspective.

Don't eat the pudding.

What's the perspective on the pudding?

It comes in big cans marked "Desert Storm."

Sometimes the kitchen has to scrape the
mold off the top before they serve it.

Hi, there.

Hi, Sister. This is Chapman.

Sister? As in nun?

Yep. A killer nun.

Now, stop it. She doesn't
know you're joking.

She chained herself to a
flagpole at a nuclear test site.

Amen.

So. Now, Chapman, what's your story?

I chained myself to a drug dealer.

Piper, you can't be taking
advice from a nun and a hippie.

By all means, seek out the supreme
wisdom of the junkie philosopher.

I pray for you, Nicky.

Aw. I pray for you, too, Sister.

I lust after you, Yoga
Jones, those sinewy arms.

You gotta love a yoga body.

You should come to class.
Watch me chaturanga.

That whole common room smells like farts.

It kind of takes away the magic for me.

You like pussy, Piper?

Or you prefer pipe as your name suggests?

I'm feeling some Sapphic
vibes coming off you.

Oh, leave her alone.

Come on, Sister.

You know you would've gone my
way if you hadn't married Jesus.

Thank you, Mommy.

Thanks, Red.

Thanks, Red.

She's your mom?

Maternal figurehead.

My actual mother lives in
Brazil with her boyfriend, Paolo,

who destroys rainforests and
collects photorealistic art.

She is a cunt. I am an embarrassment.

Hey, Red. You got one of those for me?

You got what I asked you for?

Uh, I'm working on it.

So am I. Treats come when I sleep better.

How hard is it to get me
a board from the woodshop?

People.

Who's this?

This is Chapman. She's new.
Self-surrender. Thinks she's fancy.

Here, fancy. Have a yogurt.

What do I have to do for it?

You're new. You're one
of us. Consider it a gift.

Thank you. Thank you so much.

The food here is disgusting.

What?

Did I mention that Red runs the kitchen?

Shit. I'm sorry.

Honey.

I know you just got here, so
you don't know what's what.

Well, I'm gonna tell you.

You don't like the food? It's no problem.

Holy shit. That was an epic fuck-up.

Can I help you?

Um, I'm Chapman. I'm new today.

They told me I should talk to
you. I don't have a PAC number.

Who's they?

Mr. Caputo, please let me call my fianc�.

I have to let him know I'm okay.

Two minutes. You got
two minutes, that's it.

Close the door, I don't
want a run on my office.

Inmate Gonzalez report to the supply room.

Dial nine to get out.

- Hello, Larry's phone.
- Amy?

- Piper?
- Give me the phone.

One second. Can I say hello?

Amy, I only have two minutes to talk.

Are you okay? What's it like in there?

Howard and I brought
Chinese. Larry is so upset.

- Mom.
- Let him talk, Amy.

Ma, give me the phone.

Amy, please let me talk to Larry.

You know, I read that when
Martha Stewart was in prison,

she foraged for dandelions.

Okay, Mom, please.

- I was talking!
- Amy, it's not always about you, dear.

- What is that supposed to mean?
- Piper?

I only have a minute now. I'm
calling from the guard's office.

Hey, are you okay? What's going on?

I love you so much.

I love you, too. Are you okay?

I'm wearing granny panties and
I've only spoken to white people.

You joining the Aryan Nation?

I don't know. But there's a nun here.

And you're not allowed to sleep
in your bed. Only on top of it.

That's weird.

I know, right?

And when I got here, they gave me these

little bars of hotel soap, but no shampoo.

But I think that I can borrow
some from other white people.

I love you so much.

One of my roommates had a massive
heart attack when she got here.

Okay, you are not allowed
to have a heart attack.

What did you have for dinner?

My folks brought from The Palace.

Oh. The Palace.

Dinner here was scary liver.

And I insulted the chef,

and you're not supposed to eat the pudding

because it's been to Desert Storm.

Piper, listen to me. You
cannot lose your shit, okay?

I mean it. Please, please tell
me you're keeping it together.

Please, please tell me you're okay.

- Wrap it up, Chapman.
- I'm Chapman here.

You're my Pipes, okay? And, uh, I
love you, and this is only temporary.

That's what Yoga Jones said.
But it's just been one day.

And I can't, I can't!

Piper, you can. You so can, okay?

You are so strong, babe. You...

And you love adventure, right?

That's what got you in there, and
that's what's gonna get you through.

This is all just a big adventure
with liver and Yoga Jones,

and racism.

You can come on Friday.
Please come on Friday.

Tell my mother to come on Saturday,

and don't tell her that
you're coming on Friday, okay?

Of course. Okay?

Two sleeps. That's it.

Two sleeps on top of your bed.

And then, I will be there.

Coming up on lights out. Say goodbye.

I have to go.

Hey, no crying.

I'm not crying.

Piper, I love you. I
will see you on Friday.

Please, be brave. Don't let
anyone into your granny panties.

I love you.

I love you.

Your head's not here yet.
Don't worry, it'll catch up.

In the meantime, try to get some sleep.

Orientation is tomorrow at 9:00.

Shampoo for you.

I think the words you're
looking for are, "Thank you."

Thank you.

Good night, Chapman.

Close the door behind you.

Chapman. Hey, Chapman.

- What?
- Rise and shine.

What? What?

You want time to shower
and eat, you gotta get up.

Aw, look at your eyes.

You should put some cold water on them.

Okay. Thanks.

Take a nice shower, get dressed,

you'll start to feel normal soon enough.

- You got
flip-flops? - No.

Oh, honey. There's wicked
fungus in the showers.

You're driving me crazy!

Everyone gets a piece
of fruit at breakfast.

I'm telling you, it'll all start
to feel normal, soon. Really.

- You hungry?
- I'm starving. Excuse me.

- Such pretty hair.
- Thank you.

When those roots start to show,

be sure to come and see me, okay?

I'll take good care of you.

But even if you don't come
to me, don't go to Danita.

She'll burn the shit out of
your scalp. Go. Line's moving.

Wait, Chapman? Are you Chapman?

Yes.

Red says she made that special for you.

Wow. Thanks. Tell her I said thanks.

I don't say nothing.
I'm just working. Next.

Man, I'm telling you,

before my teeth got knocked
out, I had this awesome gap.

Now they look like Chiclets, look.

You're crazy. Your fake
teeth are beautiful.

Bet you never get the food stuck in them.

So, you got the nice
fresh breath all the time.

It's minty. It's beautiful.

It's like God put them in you every day.

A summer breeze coming over here.

- Yeah? You like that?
- Always smell... Yeah. Yeah.

What did you do?

She insulted the food in front of Red.

Oh, jeez. I don't think you're
gonna be eating for a while.

Oh! Put it away. I'm enjoying
menopause very much, thank you.

You gotta figure out how to
make things right with Red.

And yeah, yeah. You
gotta go down to laundry.

Don't forget that. And check
the elastic on all the pants.

Don't let them get you
stretched-out garbage.

Orientation starts in 10 minutes.

At least you had a nice
shower this morning, right?

I think I saw you in there?

I don't... I don't know. Excuse me.

Hey! Hey, hey, don't forget,
you gotta bus your tray.

Where's she going with that tray?

Can't take them out of here.

Yeah, she'll figure it out.

Was she really in the shower this morning?

Maybe this is a bad time to say hi, huh?

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