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- I've never been the smoothest with the ladies.

I think we all know that.

I did get it right once though.

Or rather I didn't screw it up.

We met at a bar, it was her local bar, Rocky's Tavern.

I'd never been there before, I just stopped by for a drink.

And that's when I saw Cindy.

Everyone, I mean everyone knew Cindy.

She was laughing, dancing, calling the employees by name.

She must've known I was thinking about her too

because she sat down at my table.

I nearly spilled my drink.

Like, damn.

Me?

She sat down and she smiled.

She was lonely.

I mean she was kind, engaged.

Happy even, I don't know how else to say it.

She was just lonely.

Of course, I was lonely too.

So Pete, do you wanna hear about me?

- That night she told me

all sorts of personal things about her life.

About her best friends in high school.

How she could have been in the Olympics if she wanted to.

She didn't.

How many guys the waitress had slept with.

Seven.

She talked me about her sister

and the woods at night and it was beautiful.

My God, it was so beautiful.

I felt like I was living it all with her.

I had nothing to add, you know?

I just nodded, I stirred my drink

and I helped her finish hers.

I started to make up my own stories.

Isn't that pathetic?

My own emotions and memories and opinions, all fake.

She knew it.

It only made her lonelier.

She think I resent her, but I don't.

I never no, I wanna be her.

To have those emotions and memories and opinions.

To live.

And I tried.

I really really tried,

'cause in my heart I believe that I still love her.

She was as lonely last week as the night I met her.

- Let there be...Hey!

Well welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome to my home.

It's um, well, home.

I'm a book.

Have you ever met a book?

Like really engaged with it?

I mean I know we're just words,

but I think that makes us very interesting!

Words, language, words!

No guttural nonsense, you know, no ugh.

"How are you feeling today?"

"Ugh."

It's not a word.

It's a sound, an emotion.

And those are great.

I mean emotions, shew, are great.

But your emotions they need the word!

Just as the word needs your emotions.

I mean all my juicy words like exalted and yearning, lust,

well they're nothing without your ugh ugh ugh.

Exhibit A.

So, what else about me?

Oh, one could say I'm about 1,500 years old,

depending on your translation.

But I like to think of myself as still relevant.

Still hot with the kids.

I'm not one of those grumpy, old, get off-my-shelf books.

I mean I once knew a copy of Moby Dick that was, a dick.

"The new books this and the new books that"

Couldn't keep up.

That's what makes me special.

I adapt.

I am always adapting.

Country to country, century to century,

I'm the one the only, the hallowed the holy.

Bible!

Wanna talk?

- No.

- Okay.

I'm Gid, by the way.

Gideon. Gid.

- Hey Gid.

Stop!

- Stop what?

- Looking at me like that.

- Like what?

- Like you're judging me.

- I'm not judging you.

- Whatever.

- I'm not.

Should I be?

- No! - Okay.

- Okay.

- Okay.

- What do you want from me?

- I just want to talk!

- Don't most motels at least have the courtesy

to leave you in the drawer.

Jesus Christ.

- Language.

- Really?

- Look, I sit here all day.

Stuck in this motel room.

Waiting for you.

You don't have to be rude about it.

Gosh.

- You can't leave?

- Not unless you take me with you.

Sounds terrible.

- It is!

Stuck in this hotel room, my goodness.

- No, I meant taking you with me.

Walking around with you.

My god, it sounds awful.

- Mm, resistance to the Word of God.

You know you got a real Paul complex.

- Paul, huh? - Mm hmm.

- You know I saw myself

as more of George Harrison kinda guy.

- No, no, no you're a Paul.

He used to be a real sourpuss.

- Sourpuss?

- But then one day.

Acts 9:4, a light from heaven flashed around him.

He fell to the ground and heard a voice say

"I am Jesus, whom you are persecuting.

"Now get up and go into the city,

"and you will be told what you must do."

- Very dramatic.

- Oh yes.

God zapped him right then and there.

- With lightning?

- With love.

And blindness.

And he went on to spread the Word of God all over the world,

and ultimately had a big hand in writing me.

- So, I'm the sourpuss,

and you are the flash of light that's gonna save me.

Is that right?

- In a word, amen.

I'd still rather be George Harrison.

- Don't know that I know him.

- Oo, probably 'cause all you got is Bible stuff

and I'm not really talking Bible stuff

so back in the drawer with ya.

- No, no, come on.

Come on, we don't have to talk about Bible stuff.

We could talk about anything.

What's going on with the world?

Is Reagan still president?

- What?

No.

Politics are just a big Reality TV show mess.

- TV?

Well, Reagan was an actor.

- Not the same.

- Okay!

Is Batman still a thing?

- Yes, Batman is still a thing.

- Great!

Batman's my favorite.

- Mine too.

- Are the Yankees still good?

- Ah they're better.

- Dang. - Yeah.

Oh, but the Cubs won the World Series a couple years ago.

- No way?

- Yeah, yeah. It was pretty crazy.

- Oh praise God from whom all blessings flow!

Oh he's good.

Whoo hoo ha ha ha.

Oh my.

Oh my!

Oh!

Oh that's my God.

That is my God.

That's an answer to a lot of prayers.

- Oh yeah, I bet.

- You would not believe how many.

- In this town?

I'm sure.

- Can I confess something?

- Sure. - I love baseball.

It's just so, everyone's there.

Cheering for the same team.

And they're so happy!

They're in unity.

Celebrating the same amazing thing.

It's like heaven.

- Uh huh.

- A solid 30 years of prayers

I've heard up to the big guy about it.

Or was it 40?

Oh my goodness.

What year is it?

I'm sorry I try, but I always lose track.

- It's 2019.

- 2019?

Wow.

And we still have Batman!

Mm mm mm.

That makes me happy.

Shoobado bop.

- How old are you?

- Oh, one could say 1500 years, depending...

Me personally?

- Yeah.

- Let's see, it's 2019.

Gosh, that's a lot.

66.

Published Gideon's international 1953.

- Wow. - Yep.

Been stuck in this hotel room ever since.

- Dang.

- Yep.

Used to have a working TV!

In '84.

Kinda never fixed it.

Then with laptops and smartphones, yeah.

Haven't really been used much in the last few years.

Except for, you know.

- Hm?

- This one guy needed some paper to roll a joint.

Stole a piece of Judges.

Kind of ironic actually.

Yeah.

Oh then some guy spilled coffee on my once.

- Bible study?

- AA meeting.

Lost soul, searching for the answer.

- Jesus Christ.

- That's the one!

- I bet you see a lot of shady stuff

in this hotel room, huh.

- Not always!

Once a kindergartner needed something to draw on.

Back cover.

Cool, eh?

- It's cute.

- Yeah, I think so.

I mean, it's not Picasso.

- Eh, maybe it is Picasso.

- Hey. - Hey.

I guess, that makes you her Bible then, huh.

- Uh, no, no.

I'm not really anyone's Bible.

Or, I'm everyone's Bible, everyone who walks in the room.

That's kinda how I think about it, anyways.

But no no, I'm no...

I don't belong to anyone.

No underlined passages,

or highlighted Psalms of encouragement.

Yeah.

Just a princess.

- I never wrote in my Bible.

- You should.

You really should.

- Yeah.

- Expecting someone?

- Huh?

No.

No, no, just uh...

Waiting.

- Well, want to hear a story while you wait?

No.

- "In the beginning, God created the heavens a-"

Not that one.

- "And there were shepherds

"living out in the fields nearby"

No.

- "By prayer and petition,

"with thanksgiving, present your requests to"

Next.

- "He spilled his semen on the ground

"to keep from providing offspring for his brother."

- Oh my god!

That's in there?

- You'd be surprised.

- Damn.

- Indeed.

So what's the gun for?

- Nothing.

Nothing?

- Nothing.

- Is it a drug thing?

- No!

- Is it a stakeout?

Wait! You're a cop?

- Stop it!

- Oh, you must be really undercover.

How long since you've shaved?

- I'm not a cop.

- Hmm, maybe a detective?

You seem like a good guy.

- I'm not a good guy.

- So a bad guy who talks to Bibles.

- Bad guys don't use the Bible?

- Not like this.

- This isn't special man.

I've read you before.

- Oh right, your unmarked Bible.

No wonder you're confused.

- I got stuff to focus on.

- Mm. Gun stuff?

- You're not talking me out of this!

- Talking you out of what?

- This! - This what?

- Use your words, Pete!

Ugh is not a word, it's a sound an em-

Yeah, that's not really how this works.

- I'm not talking to you.

- If you insist.

What's this? - Don't.

- Is this what you wanted to talk about?

- Touch that. - A letter.

"Dear Candy"? - Cindy!

- Cindy! Sorry.

You need to work on your handwriting, sir.

Is she who the gun's for?

- No.

- "Dear Cindy, I miss you.

"Isn't that crazy?

"Even when I think about you with Leo.

"I miss you.

"But I can't forgive you.

"And I certainly won't forgive Leo.

"If you are reading this, then Leo's not around anymore.

"Good.

"I'm sure that hurts, but that's a price I'm willing to pay.

"If you're reading this now, then you've already paid it.

"I love you.

"I'm sorry you were lonely and I'm sorry I could never help.

"Peter Jameson"

I'm sorry.

- For what?

You didn't do anything.

Then again action really isn't your thing, huh?

You're all about talking, judging, predicting.

You haven't done shit for thousands of years.

What the hell is this?

- What? - This!

What the hell is this?

- Sorry.

Lots of people find me comforting.

- Comforting?

- Um, yes. - I don't.

- Okay, maybe I rushed the hug.

Look, it's been a while for me, okay?

And I'm just meeting you, you're just meeting me.

It's our first time!

We'll get it.

- Now I'm really uncomfortable.

- Fine.

But I'm trying over here,

and you have been nothing but rude to me.

Rude to you?

Look princess, I'm not gonna get tricked

into feeling sorry for you, okay?

You are not a perfect book.

You're not worth defending.

You're not an underdog.

You're kind of a monster.

And sure, my parents got off on you,

but I sure as hell don't have to.

Frankly, if I never saw you again, I'd be a happier man.

- Strong words.

I wonder are you feeling convicted?

- No. Shut up.

- A lotta pressure to put on one guy,

killing someone and all.

- Ha. - Excuse me?

- That's pretty rich coming from you.

- Uh- - You're gonna

knock me for killing?

- Yes.

10 Commandments, Exodus 20:13, thou shalt not murder.

- How many people die by your hand?

- My hand?

I'm just a book after all.

- Okay, you were written by God, right?

Yes.

- And God is good, right?

- Yes.

- How many people die by his hand?

- Some. - Some?

Tell me, was it 2 Kings

when the Angel of the Lord smote the Assyrian camp?

- Yes.

- Something like 100,000 people?

- 185,000

- 185,000 people.

- Yes, so, a lot.

- A lot.

185,000 people, in one night.

- Yes, not untrue.

- Very true, according to you.

Thou shalt not murder. unless I say so.

- Look! God gets to make that call!

I can tell you're not a believer.

- Hey, damn right.

- But I do know this:

You did not create life.

God did!

He has the power to give life

and he the authority to take it away.

You Pete, do not.

For you to murder someone in cold blood

for selfish reasons is wrong.

- You're right.

- Yes, yes I am.

- I need to be more obedient.

- Yes, you do.

- I need guidance, I need scripture.

- Praise Jesus. - O my gosh.

- Yes. Yes!

- Oh let's see.

Guidance, laws.

Leviticus!

- Oo.

- Chapter 20?

- Ya know? - Let's see verse-

- That's completely different.

- Verse 10! - See the Old Testament law

was fulfilled.

We aren't under that covenant-

If a man commits adultery

with the wife of his neighbor, both the adulterer

and the adulteress shall surely be put to death.

- You see?

I'm just following orders.

- Don't do that.

- What? Follow orders?

That's conve- - Don't abuse me.

Don't pluck out verses and twist them.

You're not humbling yourself.

You're not learning.

You're not even listening.

You're manipulating Scripture because you're selfish.

And it hurts.

It hurts people.

It hurts God.

And it hurts you.

What you said earlier, all the blood on my hands,

that's how it happens.

- So this is my fault?

- It's about to be.

You're about to kill someone.

And I will not be used.

Either don't use Scripture at all,

or take it all as a whole.

All in context.

- Context? - Yes.

- You're saying I should take

the whole chapter into account.

- The whole book!

- Right.

And if I still don't get it.

If showing love to a thousand generations in Exodus

still isn't consistent enough with killing witches

also in Exodus, I should read the whole Bible, right?

- I highly recommend it. - For context?

- For context. - Great.

And this is just a thought here.

It feels like you're asking me to do all the work for you.

Justifying all your contradictions with context.

- Asking you to read the whole thing

doesn't seem that unfair.

Imagine if I only listened to half of what you said.

- But it doesn't stop there, does it?

- What do you mean?

- Well for context, for true biblical context,

I would have to consider all the original languages

and adaptations you've been through.

The Greek, the Hebrew, the Aramaic.

- Sure, and not just the languages, the cultures-

- And then I can't forget about the historical context.

How you've been interpreted since then.

For which I would have to look through thousands of years

of church history which, to be honest,

had a lot of low points don't ya think?

Between The Crusades, Joan of Arc, pedophilia, et cetera.

- Fair point: interpretation is sloppy.

What are you getting at?

- Who do you expect to help

when no one's qualified to read you, Gid?

Are we supposed to devote half our lives

to justifying your stains with centuries of context?

What is context?

- Fine, let me simplify it for you.

- Please.

- The context is that of love.

- Love?

Well that's a goddamn catchall, isn't it?

- So, what's the plan?

- You know the plan.

- You check the parking lot every few minutes

and hope you get lucky?

- Yep.

- Ya know you could just stand by the window.

- Oh why don't I just wave my gun around too,

make sure they see me.

- Mm.

Then hopefully of all the gin joints in all Chicago,

Cindy shacks up with Leo in this dump of a hotel.

- I know she's coming.

- Oo, did God tell you?

- What, like a flash of light?

No, I stick to reality, thank you.

- Oh, like talking to a Bible.

- Touché.

I followed her.

- Ouch. - Yeah.

I kept telling myself

that I was just making sure she was safe, you know?

Even when I followed her here.

And then I followed her here again.

And again.

This was their place, Friday was their night.

I checked in to the room next door once.

It's stupid, but...

it was nice hear her laugh again.

I confronted her.

Six months.

I called and sure enough, there was a reservation.

- Maybe you missed them.

- I didn't miss them.

I have an alarm clock.

A clear view of the parking lot.

I know what car she drives.

And just in case, I told the desk clerk

to call me when they check in.

- Wow, very thorough.

- Thanks.

- So then what?

When?

- I mean after you shoot Leo

and throw this bloody note at your wife.

Then what?

- Who knows.

Maybe I'll go to a Cubs game.

- Well, that'd be fun.

- Yeah and I may need a cigarette.

You mind if I borrow a few pages?

Nothing important, just Old Testament stuff.

- Ha ha cheeky.

You know, I couldn't help but notice

you know your way around Scripture better than most.

- O yeah?

- Yeah.

And you don't strike me as a religion major.

- Why's that?

- Religion majors tend to be less...

Yes?

- Disheveled.

- You and I know very different religion majors.

Anyways it's a long story.

- I got time.

- My dad was a pastor.

Was?

- Yeah, he died a few years ago.

Five, five years ago.

Highly aggressive early onset Alzheimer's.

- I'm sorry.

- Thanks.

We rushed the wedding.

Wanted him to be there.

He didn't remember my name at the time.

And Mom was a mess,

she didn't make it through the ceremony,

And on top of all the dad stuff,

Cindy wasn't a Christian which Mom was just ballistic about.

She thought she was immature.

I guess she was right.

My dad was one of the best men that I ever knew.

A real solid guy.

And when he got sick, I started to pray.

And I prayed.

Every morning, every evening.

Fasting, Bible study, the whole bit.

Nothing, nothing, nothing.

I was in a bad way.

That's when I met Cindy, and she lit up my life.

Man, her singing, her dancing.

She was fearless.

Fearless!

I don't know, maybe I needed something to love,

or something to save because my Dad,

I couldn't save him and it hurt so much,

that I became numb.

And my faith broke a little more each day until finally,

I told God, that if Dad got better, I'd be in.

And if he didn't, then I'd be out.

He's gone now.

- How is your mom?

- Terrible.

She still prays for me.

Prays for Dad, too.

She thinks that if she has enough faith

he'll raise from the dead.

Matthew 10, right?

- That's not what I meant.

- Well it doesn't matter what you meant, all right?

This is what happens when you get shoved down the throat

of vulnerable, desperate people.

Raised from the dead?

Isn't that crazy?

And this is what I hate.

I hate when all of this faith crap

gets in the way of what's real.

You know?

I mean, my poor mom may be hung up on the fact

that Dad's gonna come back from the dead

for the rest of her life.

I wish she would just accept it and move on.

Dad's dead.

I mean what am I supposed to do with that, huh?

- I don't know.

- That's a first.

- I hope your mom comes around.

- Yeah, yeah I hope she's okay.

- You know...

I think there's a spot in there where we agree.

- That faith is a poisonous substitute for reality?

- No.

Not there.

That death is the worst.

- Death's the worst.

Yeah, I think I can get behind that.

- Not by design, you know?

People weren't originally made to die.

- I got news for you friend.

- I mean...

Anyway, death is the worst.

- Yeah.

Yeah, it's pretty bad.

- And yet.

- What?

- I mean, we both agree that death is a bad thing.

You just said so yourself.

It's, it's permanent.

Your father, he can't come back.

And that hurts.

- Yes?

- Then well Leo, I mean he's not gonna be able

to come back either.

- Yes?

- Are you gonna think about your father while you kill Leo?

What about his father. - Yeah?

- His family. - Yeah?

- This of all the damage your father's death caused.

- You're the worst, you know that.

Taking my pain and guilting me with it.

- So it's my fault that you feel guilty?

- No, no.

- It has nothing to do with the fact

that you're about to shoot someone.

- That's real shitting man, to use pain as a tool.

- Not use, address!

I'm addressing your pain.

- You don't get to.

- Pete, I can help.

- I decide, you don't get to force and manipulate me.

Can you just stop and think for one second?

- You know you dig and dig, you pretend like you care.

But you just want to find an in.

Isn't that right? - Listen to me.

- You just want to know what makes me weak!

- What if you die?

- Screw you, man.

- What if Leo has a gun?

I mean, he knows you know.

She probably told him, right? - I don't care.

- I mean, she would have told him.

- I don't care.

You don't get to tell me what to do.

- Don't remind me.

I just sit here offering you words of truth and love-

- You have no authority here!

- Your loss.

- Who the hell do you think you are?

- The Word of God.

The Word of God?

- Straight from the mouth.

- You mean the mouth of 40 violent dead men.

- Who were inspired by the Holy Spirit several-

- Oh good!

Insane violent dead men.

Who got high on some

Holy Spirit and wrote a book - They weren't insane.

You think I'm insane? - for a buncha straight men.

- I am inspired.

I am the Bible.

- You hurt people. - I'm the Word of God!

- John 1.

Jesus is the Word of God.

That's gotta be true, isn't it?

- Yes.

- You aren't Jesus, are you?

- No. - No, you're not the Father,

or the Son or the Holy Spirit.

- I'm Scripture for God's sake.

- Right. You're Scripture.

You're the Word of God, but you aren't the voice of God,

you're not God himself.

- Yes but you need the Word.

- Like you need God?

- Yes.

No! - Oh, so I don't need you?

You only go so far.

- Oh, trust me. I go pretty far.

- Yeah, but not far enough.

- I go pretty far.

- Easy man, your Old Testament's showing.

- I go pretty far.

Hey, I got a question.

What's it like getting to believe whatever?

- I don't believe whatever, I just don't believe in you.

You're a cocky son of a bitch, you know that.

Look who's talking.

- Yeah, look who's asking.

- I mean it's just so incredible,

God lets people believe anything.

It's pretty great actually.

- Yeah?

Man, it's wild.

Oh, what's the craziest thing you ever believed?

- The Bible.

- Fine.

What's the second craziest thing you ever believed?

- You can't judge me, okay?

- Okay.

- When I was a kid I believed that Pokemon were real.

- No way!

- Yeah.

- Like really believed it though.

- Oh yeah man, I was positive

I was gonna catch a Charmander in my backyard.

- Wow!

What's a Pokemon?

- Oh, it's this super fun Satan thing

that people used to do on the weekends.

- What?

- Oh, yeah.

You go off into the deep grass, maybe a cave.

You summon up a Scyther, Pinsirs, Mr. Mime.

- Pete, you were a Satan worshipper?

- Nope.

I Gotcha.

- Ugh.

- Ugh?

Use your words, Gid.

You're better than that.

- Pokemon.

- Okay what about you?

What's the craziest thing you believe.

- Oh.

I mean, I believe myself.

I'm kinda locked in.

I don't really change.

That's why I asked you.

I'm a codified system of beliefs.

- Exactly, that's what I mean.

What's the craziest codified belief you got in you?

- Oh, that's tough!

Well there's an angel with a cow face.

Ezekiel, it's trippy.

A 7-headed dragon chasing a pregnant woman.

Revelation, also trippy.

And then there's the Leviathan and the Nephilim.

Honestly, the craziest thing to me,

is that God, big infinite God,

let these itty bitty little people make infinite choices.

Like believing whatever.

That's it, that's the craziest thing.

- You also can sit back and judge us when we choose wrong.

- You don't always choose wrong.

- Not that you'd know.

- Come on, if there is one thing I know

it's right and wrong.

- Please.

- Really? You disagree?

- Yes I disagree.

Morality in the Bible is all over the place,

and morality through God, well that's impossible.

- What?

- Oh yeah, the idea of morality

and the God of the Bible don't fit together.

- That's ridiculous. - It's true.

- Explain. - No.

- Come on.

- Ugh. - Ugh?

You scared?

- No.

- Okay.

- Fine, but if I win this one, you have to leave me alone.

- What?

- If I can prove to you that morality

and the God of the Bible don't fit together,

then you go back in the drawer; talk over.

- Okay, Mr. Religion Major.

And if I win, then you have to take me to a Cubs game.

- No. - Yep!

- Not happening.

- Please?

- People don't bring Bibles to baseball games.

- You can put me in a sleeve,

everybody'll think I'm a dictionary.

- People don't bring dictionaries to baseball games-

- Please, please, please, please!

please, please, please, please

please, please, please

please, please, please, please

- Fine. - Yes!

Okay.

Prosecution takes opening arguments, sir.

- Let's pretend that God exists, and that morality,

right and wrong, flow from him.

It comes from his magical God beard.

Whatever. - Love it.

- Except that if God sets the standard

for moral and immoral, then right and wrong

will change at the snap of his God-fingers.

- Faulty premise.

God doesn't change.

Morality stays the same because God stays the same.

Point for Gideon.

- What about Abraham?

- My Abraham?

- Yes! Your Abraham.

God asked him to kill his son.

Yes? - Yes, but God stopped him.

- Exactly!

He asked him and then he stopped him.

He changed his mind.

- Point for Pete!

- Objection!

- Overruled!

He's either a liar or he's sick.

How, how then can I rely on God for moral guidance?

His morality is constantly shifting.

Two points for Pete!

- Okay, okay.

My turn.

The defense begins.

Let's zoom out.

- Hate it.

- Now you say God and his morality are constantly shifting.

But to say that something is shifting

implies that you are on stable ground

and able to perceive said shift.

Your argument acknowledges

that there's a stable objective morality.

Yes? - Proceed.

- So there's an immovable code of right and wrong.

- Correct. - We agree.

But who defines that code?

Either God is shifting, and you are stable.

Or you are shifting, and God is stable.

It's like the sun.

It looks like the sun is rising,

when in fact it's you that's moving.

Now if I have to guess which one is stable

between you and God, I choose the creator of the universe

not the guy with the gun.

Two points to two!

- Let's bring it back to morality, though.

Shall we?

Remember context?

You bend over backwards to qualify God's decisions.

God violates my conscience!

Clearly, then, I must have a moral measuring stick

apart from God.

Point!

- And who made your measuring stick?

You're appealing to a moral code without an author.

A substance without a source.

An effect without a cause.

Point! - Not necessarily.

- Pete, you're not looking to disprove God.

You're looking for a better god.

- Damn right.

Your god is an objectively bad communicator.

Point!

- Oh so he is moral, you just don't understand him.

Point!

He ties the game.

- Fine.

You're saying God is always moral.

- No, he defines moral.

- Whatever.

So all I need to do is find one example of God

not being moral, and I win.

- Good luck.

- Okay. Genocide.

- Hmm.

- Killing children as part of a plague.

Sacking Canaan, and calling it Promised Land.

Drowning all of humanity, and oh look a rainbow.

These are war crimes.

I say these are objectively terrible things to do.

Terrible.

Do you agree?

- I agree.

- So I win?

- No!

While these things are terrible and horrifying,

they must have been much better than the alternative.

- What is what precisely?

- I don't know.

- What?

- I don't know!

And that's my point.

We don't know what the alternative would have been.

A world without freedom?

Greater evil?

No consequence for injustice?

Who knows.

But the answer is certainly not that God is immoral,

God is good definitionally,

he made goodness, he can't not be good!

It's like asking a triangle to be a square!

- But he's changed his mind before.

- From your point of view.

And you could too if you wanted.

- You just pivoted off of morality.

- You just pivoted off of murder.

- You're a piece of work, you know that?

- You kidding me?

I'm an all-time best seller baby.

I'm good at this.

- That I did not say.

- Here, let me prove it to ya.

You can go into some prayer or meditation time.

I'll give you some juicy verse to chew on.

- I'll get all teary eyed and start confessing?

My God! - Yes!

Then the Holy Spirit can come and comfort you

like a loving father holding his sweet precious son.

- Oh you mean Jesus.

- Would you stop?

- I swear I will throw you out that window.

- Oh would you please?

I'd see the world!

- You're unbelievable. - That's not true.

Hundreds of millions of people believe in me.

- Not me.

- Yes, you've made that abundantly clear.

- Good.

- Sigh.

Pete, you've said a lot

about how wrong I am.

You've got a lot of things you don't believe.

What exactly do you believe?

- I believe...

The truth is I feel the happiest when I do something.

I never felt happy with God.

I felt afraid with God, I felt alone with God.

I feel the safest when I rely on myself.

And I'm not good,

but I want to be.

I want to know myself.

Improve myself!

And religion. God.

God.

Any god that damns humanity for eating an apple

in pursuit of knowledge is no god of mine.

Anything that limits personal responsibility,

self-improvement through self reflection is wrong,

is inadequate and it is evil.

Religion is just the fog of war

that separates mankind from himself.

It's funny.

It's kinda like what you said earlier.

I believe in me.

- Me.

Self.

That's all that I am.

- What if you're not enough?

For what exactly.

- Everything you believe is based on you.

What if you're not enough?

- For what?

For living, dying-

- Let me rephrase.

Pete, you're not enough.

If you are trying to shoulder the weight

of justifying your own existence, it's going to kill you.

But, you know, when you fail.

When! Not if.

You don't measure up.

God loves you with his whole heart.

He paid a ridiculous price to be with you,

to be your justice.

He loves you.

- There is no God.

- Come on!

Okay.

Tell me this.

If you knew there was a god,

a loving God up there, would you admit it?

Seriously?

See, you're not looking for truth,

for what's real.

You don't want there to be a god.

You can't believe that someone loves you.

You can't accept it.

You know what, I think you know there's a god.

Somewhere deep down.

- You don't know what I know.

- At least you're pretty darn sure.

And it feels safer to treat it like some big question mark

because of what if would mean.

Look, Pete.

I don't think you're in an existential philosophy crisis.

I think you're in pain.

And there's a good, big God up there who loves you.

Let him in.

- "Let him in"?

"I know the plans I have for you",

"Let go and let God."

It's all the same message, isn't it?

Be passive!

Stop trying to effect your own life and trust in the thing

that disappears the second you start looking for it.

You asked me, if there was a God would I admit it?

Yes!

Of course.

You don't think I want to be real?

You don't think I spent every Sunday, every dinner,

Christmas, every god damn second

with my father drinking the Kool-aid?

I was in the fold, man.

You talk like, I know there's a God,

but I wish there wasn't.

No!

I wish God was real, but where the fuck is he?

Your God and your religion

kept telling me the same thing, be passive.

It's like this disease that stuck to me

even when I left, and I'm done.

I'm done being passive.

I was passive with Cindy.

And I will not be passive with Leo.

- Is there a god?

- Why are you torturing me?

I already broke myself when I left Christianity.

And it hurt.

And now you want to break me again?

Why, what for?

- Is there a god?

- I don't know.

Do you believe there's a god?

- Yes.

- You're tired of being passive?

Pursue God.

Get up.

Start walking, run to him.

I'm not trying to torture you.

I'm trying to help you.

- I don't need your help.

- 'Cause you're just doing so great right now?

- No, because all you've got are words.

And all he's got...

He's not even here!

You think he'll help me?

I've heard that before.

I'm still waiting for him to show up.

- What would you ask of him?

To come in the flesh?

To sacrifice himself, to be crucified,

just so he could be with you?

- No, I want him here, now.

- Okay, so if God was here right now, you would stop?

- Yes.

- Great!

Pete.

He is.

Here.

Now.

In this very room. - No. Not invisible god.

Real God.

You talk about a relationship, God becoming flesh.

Why not now?

Why not here?

Why am I not enough?

- No Pete, that's not-

- I mean part a sea, burn a bush, be here.

Give me a sign.

- You've been talking to the Bible for the last 30 minutes.

How much more of a sign do you want?

- We have talked before, many times.

- Then you should know!

You've got to let go.

Trust him.

- Trust him.

Do you have any idea what that means?

- Of course, I do.

It means to have faith.

Hebrews 11:1.

Now faith is being sure- - No Gideon,

do you know what that means?

- I just said- - No, Gideon.

Do you know what it means to trust God

when your own father doesn't remember your name?

Or what it means to trust God when you argue with your mom

about whether to plan the funeral

because she thinks Dad will raise from the dead?

Or what is means to trust God

when the woman you love leaves you for another man?

Do you have any idea?

- Look. I know you've had pain-

- No, no you do not know, and that is what I am saying.

Tell me when you felt pain.

Talk to me as someone who had to trust God

when it was impossible.

How did you do it?

Who are you to talk to me about trusting God?

- I'm, I'm his Word.

- His Word?

Well, do me a favor: go get God and bring him.

He lost a son, right?

I'll talk to him.

But you, you've got no skin in the game.

You're a tool.

A hammer left by God.

- Look, I'm his Word-

- And you are not enough.

- I'm trying-

- And you are not enough!

What?

- You don't.

You can't...

- What? I can't grasp the context-

- You can't see how lucky you are.

You are correct.

I am words.

And for all my words

I'm at best a tool,

at worst a weapon.

Or a cigarette.

Don't get me wrong, I got a sweet gig.

God works through me.

It's great.

But you...

you can choose.

Grow.

Change!

Connect to the God who made the universe.

You've got this chance, this opportunity

to trust him in the mystery,

to have faith when life gets blurry.

It's beautiful!

I know it sucks.

Or...

You're right, I don't.

I guess it sounds like it sucks.

But it's beautiful too.

- Can you save me, Gid?

- For God so loved the world

that he gave his only begotten son-

- I've already read it.

- You've gotta, you gotta believe it,

come into a saving acceptance of the truth of it,

an intimate knowing of God.

- God.

You can't save me.

- No.

Pete-

You don't have to answer that phone.

You can walk away, you can walk away right now.

- Hello?

Yes, yes, it is.

Great.

Thank you.

- You don't have to do this.

We, we can hang out.

Catch a Cubs game.

Pete.

Peter!

Please.

- Thank you for everything Gid.

This was fun.

And, I know you wanted to help.

And...

I hope that no one rolls a cigarette out of you again.

- Peter!

Peter!

Uh, uh.

Uh, okay, okay.

Um God.

Um God.

Um God.

Look.

Peter, I mean,

Peter, you know Peter he's the one with the-

Oh

Oh

Come on Gid.

Peter.

He uh.

I mean.

He's about to do something pretty bad.

And I know you let people, but um.

Be with him.

Please.

He needs you.

- Pete?

Peter?

You okay?

- Please, be with him.

Just be with them both.

He needs you.

- Pete.

He needs you.

He needs you.

He needs you.

Thank you so much for the help.

I'm sorry, that's quite heavy.

Yeah, yeah.

I've got it from here.

Thanks.