Original subtitles

Hey, you're good:

[Narrator] Princess Ardala returns with a plot to create duplicates of Buck Rogers for her own sinister purpose:

Captain Buck Rogers, meet Captain Buck Rogers:

As you see, Captain, you can be replaced:

I want you to launch the attack against Earth immediately:

What can one Buck Rogers possibly do against three?

That's two down: One more to go:

- Boring, Buck: Boring: - Which one?

[Man Narrating] The year is 1987,

and NASA launches the last of America's deep space probes:

In a freak mishap, Ranger 3 and its pilot, Captain William "Buck'"Rogers,

are blown out of their trajectory into an orbit which freezes his life-support systems: : :

And returns Buck Rogers to Earth: : :

500 years later:

[Man] Ship stabilized at one-quarter power: Advance to half power:

Roger: Advancing to half power:

[Engine Fluttering]

I'm getting severe vibrations: I'm losing it! I'm losing it!

So much for Hero Number Seven, isn't it, Kane?

If you keep this up, we'll have to message my father for more posthumous medals:

There is nothing wrong with my design, Princess:

Of course not:

Except that it kills all of our best pilots because no one can fly it: Cancel the program:

Princess, your father would never agree: You know that he... Sit down!

I know what my father would agree to:

As punishment for the way the Terrans have insulted me,

I'm to be allowed to destroy any city on Earth that I wish:

Without this program, Princess, it will be impossible to penetrate Terran defenses:

Then stop talking and find someone who can fly your Hatchet fighter:

Perhaps you:

No, not you:

But there is a man who would be ideal:

But: : : Buck Rogers would never agree:

We don't need his permission: We have Lab 23:

Mm: Once we have the prototype, we can always improve on the model:

That I seriously doubt:

It's beautiful, Twiki: What exactly is it?

[Chirping] Just what you ordered... a ping-pool table:

A ping-pool table? I ordered a Ping-Pong table, Twiki: Pool's an entirely different game:

[Chirping] Well, there was a page missing from the construction manual:

Somewhere between pong and pool I imagine, right?

- What is Ping-Pong, Buck? - Oh, it's a terrific game:

Two, four people... uh, excuse me, entities can play it:

And you simply hit the ball over the net in the middle with those two paddles:

Oh, I see: Maybe:

[Chirping] Why, Buck?

Why?

Because: : : It's a game: [Chuckles]

- How quaint: - Well, let's play it:

You'll get an idea how it works when you see it in action, okay? I seriously doubt that:

Get over there: All right:

Pick up the paddle: All right:

- Now, I'll hit the ball over the net to you: You hit it right back to me, okay? - If you say so:

Now remember, if the ball doesn't go over the net, you lose a point:

- Ready? - Mm-hmm:

[Ball Thuds, Rolls]

- [Twiki] An ace, Buck? - It didn't go over the net: I won:

Well, uh, that was easy: What's next, Buck?

[Beeps] Dr: Huer:

- Is Colonel Deering with you, Buck? - Right here, sir:

- Colonel, would you please report to my office: - Uh, right away, sir:

- And, Buck, you might find this interesting too: Huer out: - [Beeps]

Come on, Twiki:

- Our robot probes picked it up when it entered our solar system: - It's like a letter from home:

No offense, Buck: But it just looks like more antique space junk to me:

Can I get a look inside?

Yes, if you like:

Good heavens: There's an astronaut:

- Who could it be, Buck? - I can't be sure:

That ship was flying recon in my time:

[Buck] We might have taken training together at NASA:

I'd like to take a ship up there and get a better look:

Yes, of course: Take Twiki with you in case you have trouble with the air lock entry:

- [Chirping] - Our records show no further launches after yours, Captain Rogers:

Yeah, well, your records have been off before:

Yes, Buck's right: There's a capsule up there with an astronaut aboard:

Come on, Twiki, let's move it: [Chirping] Oh, boy:

Use caution, Captain Rogers:

Prepare for docking:

[Buck] Easy does it:

[Sighs] Nothing to it:

Twiki, is it safe to open this thing?

[Chirping] It is if you push green, green, red, green:

Something must be wrong: Maybe it's stuck: Can you get it open, Twiki?

You got it, boss:

Theo was right, Twiki: It's a trap: Let's get out of here:

Hey, what's goin' on?

Well, Twiki, it looks like we're about to take a trip:

[Chirping]

The question is where?

Captain Rogers:

How good of you to drop by:

Great costume, Tigerman: You goin' trick or treatin'?

Defiance: I always liked that in a man:

What did you think of my ingenious invitation, Captain?

- I was swept away by emotion: - Leave us:

Shall I order the ambu-quad disassembled? [Chirping]

You ever have two broken arms, buster?

No: I'd like Captain Rogers's visit to be a pleasant one:

After all, a friendly ear in a strange place is such a comfort:

[Chirping] Put me down, you big ox:

Well, now that we're alone, Captain: : :

Why don't we make ourselves comfortable?

[Liquid Pouring]

A toast: To friendships old and new:

All right, Princess, what have you got up your sleeve this time?

Why nothing: : : But myself, Captain:

Terrific:

Look, Princess, as soon as I'm missed, the Defense Directorate is gonna send a rescue squad after me:

Granted: When they discover you're missing: : :

And when they figure out where you are:

By then you'll have had ample time to fulfill your mission here:

My mission?

Princess, we have been through this twice before:

- We have irreconcilable differences, remember? - No, I don't:

Let's make the most of your time here, shall we?

Kane, is Lab 23 ready? Yes, Princess:

Excellent: We'll be there immediately: Come with me, Buck:

I have someone I want to introduce you to: : : An old friend:

I can't imagine a nice guy like me knowing anybody in a place like this:

On the contrary, Buck: I think you'll find you both have a lot in common: Kane:

[Chirping] Holy cow! That's you, Buck:

Captain Buck Rogers, meet Captain Buck Rogers:

Something you threw together in crafts class, Princess?

[Kane] Alloy skeleton, vat-grown protoplasm:

The Empire's most sophisticated minicomputer for a brain...

- Zygot Mark 1, which will... - That's enough, Kane:

[Flips Switch]

- Fascinating likeness, except I'm alive: - So shall he be:

Once he's programmed to your neural responses,

Kane assures me we'll have a Captain Buck Rogers superior to the original model:

[Chirping] Once a dummy, always a dummy:

Shall we ready him for the neural duplicator, Princess?

Run for it, Buck!

[Man On P: A:] Alert:! Alert:! Intruder in Sector B:! Alert:!

[Grunting] [Kane] You would be advised, Captain, to remember: : :

You are only needed undamaged until the neural duplication is complete:

And you would be well-advised, Kane, to keep your guards under control:

Captain Rogers is not to be harmed: Yes, Princess:

[Dr: Huer] Starfighter 1314, this is New Chicago Command:

Come in, Buck:

There's something wrong: I'm gonna check out a starfighter:

Yes: Very well: But be careful:

[Whirring]

You look reasonably comfortable:

Well, it's not exactly a sport coat and slacks, but it'll do:

It's a neural capacitance suit:

Do tell: Why am I wearing it?

- Because, Captain, you have something we want: - I'm not feeling very generous:

Wherever you've been and whatever you've done: : :

Is recorded in the neural cells of your magnificent body:

This suit will duplicate those neural memories for us:

I pass: Negative:

No thanks: Not today, Princess:

Don't be nervous, Buck: It's totally painless:

I'm not nervous: I just don't like the idea of your machine tiptoeing through my neural memories:

Enough talk: Let's begin the search:

Pleasant dreams, Captain:

Ardala, I said no!

- Kane, if you touch that machine, I'll... - You'll what, Captain? Anaesthetize him:

There, his military experience:

Lock on that:

Record the patterns:

We found the ship: Both Buck and Twiki are gone: And there's no sign of the capsule:

Then they must have boarded it:

Begin a grid pattern search immediately, Colonel:

Acknowledged: Deering out:

Any data from that robot probe, Doctor?

The probe routinely recorded a ship's arrival at those coordinates, obviously Buck's shuttle:

Twenty minutes later, the probe logged a departure from that area:

The capsule: But its power should have been exhausted a century ago:

- Display: - [Beeping]

This is an electromagnetic pattern...

the fingerprint of the capsule's drive:

- Any known pattern? - [Beeping]

This readout is characteristic of the Draconian Imperial drive units:

- [Beeping] - They match:

That wasn't a space relic after all: It was an Imperial trap:

What have they done with Buck?

What's going on?

That's not very neighborly:

As a matter of fact, that's not even friendly:

Look at those reaction times:

They're twice that of Draconian norms: It's absolutely incredible:

- Not as incredible as my Zygot will be: - I seriously doubt that:

If you doubt me, why are you aiding me?

Because it amuses me, Kane:

We have enough data: Terminate the illusion:

[Typing]

[Ardala On P: A:] Bravo, Captain:

All right: You fooled me, Ardala: But fighting holographic images isn't like the real thing:

On the contrary, Captain Rogers:

We created holographic situations which are twice as critical as the real thing:

We recorded your every marvelous response:

My Zygots will be most appreciative:

Guards, take Captain Rogers back to his cell:

He must be very tired:

[Chirping] Why are they doing this?

They're programming that Zygot to be me: Then they're gonna send it back to Earth:

What for, Buck? What are they trying to do?

I wish I knew:

Your father should be very pleased with your addition to his suggestion that we destroy New Chicago:

Yes: It will be much easier dealing with Earth: : :

Once we do away with that stuffy Dr: Huer: : :

And that detestable Colonel Deering:

You are truly your father's daughter:

Everything is ready: Shall we go?

- Not yet: Bring Rogers to me: - What for?

You are not to question my orders, Kane!

Ever:! Yes, Princess!

- You sent for me? - I did, indeed:

Make yourself comfortable:

I need to make a decision, Buck: And I need your help:

Another test? Not exactly:

Not everything has to be work:

Some things are simply pleasure:

I may be a Draconian princess, but I still have feelings:

If I told you that I'd adjusted to the idea that our relationship was one-sided,

that your feelings for me would never be as intense as my feelings for you,

would you simply be my consort?

Not your husband? No:

Not your slave? No, Buck: Never:

I'm sorry: I can't:

But how can you reject me? I'm a Draconian princess:

Buck! Look at me!

Am I so horrible?

Am I not beautiful enough for you?

- You're one of the most beautiful women I've ever seen: - Then why can't you love me?

I can't change my feelings simply because you want me to:

But how do you know, Buck? You've never tried:

Love isn't something that two people can try to make happen:

They either have something very special or they don't:

And we don't, Ardala:

I'm sorry:

Captain Buck Rogers:

You think you're so special: One of a kind:

Well, I have an answer for that:

If I can't have you one way, I'll have you another:

Hey, Princess!

How you doin'? Who's this clown?

Oh, yeah: That's right: You're me: [Chuckles] What's happening?

Listen, I'm really looking forward to meeting this Wilma Deering, man:

She is one sharp chick: She's something else, right?

- Well, there goes my reputation: - Hey, you can't talk that way about me:

Hey, you're good: But I'm good too: Remember, I have your mouse-like reflexes:

- Mouse-like? - Correction: Catlike:

Well, you got a real winner there, Princess:

When are you gonna teach him to walk and chew gum at the same time? Out! Out!

Your wish is my command:

Gentlemen, please be careful: After all, I am the master mold:

Hey, take it easy, Princess: Remember, brick walls do not a castle keep:

Oh, shut up!

I believe I have located Twiki on board the Draconian ship, Doctor:

- [Beeping] - [Theo] Yes:

Those are his E: M: Transmissions:

Fortunately, they're close enough to Earth to get a tight beam through:

[Dr: Huer] Twiki?

[Chirping]

Can we use you as a relay to Buck?

[Chirping] Take me: I'm yours:

Buck? Buck, wake up!

Hmm? What? [Dr: Huer] Buck, wake up:

[Sighs] Oh: [Dr: Huer] Buck: Wake up, Buck:

I must have been dreaming: I thought I heard Dr: Huer:

- [Dr: Huer] You did: - Twiki: [Groans]

Will you stop playing games?

This isn't a game, Buck: This is Dr: Huer:

- It is you, Doc: - Are you all right? Can you report?

Excellent: They've finally gotten through: But don't let Captain Rogers reveal our plan:

I don't have all the pieces yet: But as near as I can figure,

they found a way to...

[Static] We're getting distortion from solar flares:

We're losing your signal: Can you get out of your cell?

Well, I can try: What then?

Wilma's waiting half a parsec from the mother ship:

Well, I'll be right there: I hope:

Good luck: Twiki, returning control to you: Thank you:

[Chirping] I feel funny:

Yeah, well, never mind that:

If you can get that door open, we'll both be going home:

[Chirping] Sure:

Are the men in position? Yes, Princess:

The magic touch:

Let's go, Twiki: Let's go, Buck:

Come on:

[Man On P: A:] Alert:! Alert:! Intruder in Sector B:!

Come on, Twiki: Let's go: All security guards, report to your stations: Code 3:

Repeat: All security guards report to your stations: Code 3:

[Chirping] Where are you, Buck? Buck?

Hey, wait for me:

Go wait in the storage room while I preflight the ship:

[Chirping]

Uh-oh: I think I'm in trouble:

[Groaning]

[Chirping] Buck, what happened?

This is Captain Buck Rogers calling Earth Defense Directorate: Come in:

[Wilma] Is that you, Buck?

That's a big roger: I'm on my way home:

Thank heavens! You're both safe?

Oh, that's a negative, Wilma: Twiki didn't make it:

Oh, I'm sorry, Buck: I'll meet you at the stargate:

[Thunderclap]

- Come on, Buck: Let's go home: - That's a big 10-4:

Why the long face, Captain? Buck Rogers is on his way home:

Boy, are you guys a sight for stiff eyes! [Chuckles]

I'm sorry about Twiki, Buck: But we'll program another ambu-quad just like him:

Oh, Dr: Huer, Twiki wasn't just another ambu-quad: He was Buck's best friend:

And it just wouldn't be the same, would it, Buck?

Well, who knows? I guess not: [Chuckles] I understand:

You know, I'd forgotten how beautiful you are:

Oh! Well, I'm glad to see you too, Buck:

L: : : Think:

As you see, Captain, you can be replaced:

Do you feel better now?

That Zygot was just the first:

There will be three more, and they are all programmed to destroy New Phoenix:

Using your neural patterns and our Hatchet fighters,

they'll slip through Earth's defense forces like they're not even there:

We'll bring you up to watch the attack, Buck:

After all, you are the star: : : All three of you:

And if you're wondering about the prototype, he's armed with a one-kiloton nuclear device: : :

Which is programmed to detonate when he's with New Chicago's three top leaders:

[Clears Throat]

Buck? Are you all right? Sure: Hi, Wilma:

- Thinking ofTwiki? - Twiki? Oh, yeah: I'm really at the dumps about him:

Buck? You haven't been taking care of your plants:

Plants? That's right: I like plants, don't I?

Buck, what's wrong?

I saw something on board the Draconian ship: Something important:

It could help us against Ardala and Kane:

Well, what was it? I'm not sure: They had me so doped up:

Maybe if we got together with Dr: Huer and Dr: Theopolis, they could pull it out:

Well, of course: As soon as Dr: Huer comes back from inspecting the outer defenses, uh, we'll meet:

Great! It will be very explosive stuff:

Yeah:

[Buzzing] [Men Grunting]

[Chirping] Ready?

Ready as I'll ever be: [Grunting]

You guys fighting or dancing?

You're insulting a Draconian soldier, Earth trash:

Oh, is that what you call yourselves?

Well, I'd show you how to use those toys, but, uh, you probably bruise easily:

- Besides, I like a good fight: - Earth trash:

Come feel the sting of a Draconian soldier's stun stick:

[Chirping] Ooh! That smarts:

[Chirping]

Nice work, Champ: They never laid a glove on you:

Well, some days the magic works:

[Chirping] And some days it doesn't:

[Whirring]

[Whirring Stops]

Do you still think your Buck Rogers will be better than the real man?

These are Imperial combat weapons, not my Buck Rogers:

And, yes, they will be able to do anything he can, only twice as well: Really?

[Chirping] Ooh! That tickles, Buck! Uh-huh!

I knew it: They had you bugged:

That's how they knew we were gonna try an escape: [Chirping]

No wonder I felt so funny: Yeah:

[Sighs] Now we can try and figure a way to sabotage Kane's duplicating machine: : :

Without them listening in on it: Do you have a plan?

Yes, an idea:

I'm the master mold, right?

A flawed master mold means ruined production models:

I just can't figure out a way to flaw me:

[Chirping] If you were a computer, I could short-circuit you:

That's it! What's it?

If you could send a low voltage current through my body,

it would jangle my neural responses for about 20 minutes or so:

[Chirping] And curl your hair too, Buck:

Well, more importantly, it could give Kane and Ardala some very shocking results:

[Chirping] All right, ready, Buck?

[Electric Hum]

I'm receiving strange synaptic responses:

If I didn't know any better, I'd say he'd been drinking Antaraen brandy!

Nonsense, Kane: Continue programming the captain's clones:

Perhaps I've been too harsh with you, Kane:

Yes, much too harsh:

Well, I'm glad somebody else noticed: I was beginning to think I was crazy:

Oh, no: Not at all: He's just not the same Buck Rogers:

It's almost as if his spirit is missing:

- Yes: - It's so strange:

A possibility... psychosurgery while a prisoner:

That's conceivable: Which would mean... [Door Opens]

- Hi, gang! What's goin' up? - Hi, Buck:

Correction: Should read, what's coming down? Wilma,

Dr: Huer, Dr: Theopolis:

- We're finally all together: - [Man On P: A:] Red alert:! Red alert:! Evacuate Level 3:!

[Alarm Ringing] What is it, Doctor?

Security sensors have detected a Draconian bomb:

Radiation profile indicates explosion is imminent:

- Where is it? - A red alert search is being conducted at this moment:

[Clicking]

- What are you doing here? - The bomb is in this room: It's somewhere right here:

Excuse me, sir:

Detonation minus five seconds: : :

Four: : : Three: : : :

- Two... - Wilma, what...

Bomb destroyed: End red alert:

[Man On P: A:] Red alert terminated:

That wasn't Buck: It was a robot: Yes:

Doctor, I want you to put all Earth units on full wartime alert:

We just don't know when Princess Ardala will make her next move:

[Beeping]

Well, it looks like the end of the line for Rogers the Robot, eh, Ardala?

I gotta tell you, Kane: Your Zygot just doesn't have what it takes:

That was only the prototype:

The production models are far superior:

Computer tests prove that they are capable of defeating any Earth unit easily,

despite your childish attempt to sabotage their programming:

Captain Rogers appears worried:

Perhaps, Kane, for once you've got something:

We are ready to strike: Shall I give the order?

Patience, Kane, dear:

First, send the Zygots to my chambers: I wish to inspect them personally:

You see, Buck, with three Buck Rogers,

you become, shall we say, redundant?

[Ardala] At ease, Captains Rogers: Make yourselves at home:

I've waited a lifetime for this moment:

Not quite yet: Be patient:

[Gulps Loudly]

Join me:

- That sounds intense: - I intend it to be:

Maybe later: I'm into my own space right now:

Typical bomber driver:

Doesn't know how to handle anything: : : Including a woman:

- How would you handle a woman? - [Gulps]

Easy on the controls:

Preflight her real slow while you're waiting for clearance:

There was this one honey at Clark when I was flying F-16s with the Widowmakers:

Gently!

She was fine: But those F-16s, they were really sweet:

I remember one mission...

[Sighs]

What can she conceivably do with three Buck Rogers for an hour and a half?

Wild Weasel's ship said there was a Sam-12 on my tail:

So I hit right rudder, grayed out... Hold it, flyboy:

- What? - What about the woman?

What woman? I'm talking about F-16s:

I know: I know: For two hours:

There's more to life than flying, Princess:

What did you have in mind?

Soft music:

Slow dancing:

[Garbled Chatter]

What's the matter, Princess? Leave me alone:

Leave me alone!

- Buck? - What do you want, Ardala?

Nothing: Never mind:

I am Princess Ardala:

Kane:

Yes, Princess? Those Zygots?

They had better know something about fighting:

I want you to launch the attack against Earth immediately:

As you wish, Princess:

[Flips Switch]

Earth is defenseless against you:

And now, my Zygots, your instructions:

Two of you will engage the Earth starfighters and keep them at bay:

A third will avoid all combat: : :

And will obliterate New Phoenix with an antimatter bomb:

For the Empire!

[All] For the Empire!

Okay, Twiki: You got it?

[Chirping] Sounds like a real long shot:

Well, how was your party, Princess? The Zygots were launched 10 minutes ago:

Soon New Phoenix will be a memory:

You notice how she never answered my question, Twiki?

[Chirping] Party must've been a bust:

Poor Ardala: Always a bridesmaid, never a bride:

Bride: : : Bride: : :

Bride... What's the matter with you?

Who, me?

Me: : : Me: : :

Me... Another Zygot! I've been deceived!

You know, Twiki, sometimes you almost have to feel sorry for princesses:

[Chirping] Almost: Let's truck, Buck:

[Chirping]

[Beeps]

Come on:

[Beeping]

Here it is: It's coming in now:

Hatchet fighters: The first wave of Princess Ardala's attack:

Scramble all squadrons! Penetration section Oboe 3:

You'll lead the first squadron, Colonel: Intercept those fighters and destroy them:

Yes, Doctor:

He's escaped in one of your hatchet fighters masquerading as a Zygot!

Impossible: But I saw that Zygot in the cell!

Readouts from the beings in those three ships:

No human would register a positive electrostatic pulse reading:

This way, Twiki: Come on:

[Chirping]

[Beeping]

He's a fool: He'll never make it:

The port's closing, Buck:

Hang on, Twiki: It's gonna be a tight squeeze:

Something must be wrong: Even my Zygots can't control a ship at that rate of speed:

There is no error:

It's impossible to capture him now:

He's on an intercept with our attack force:

That's just fine: Fine? What do you mean fine?

What can one Buck Rogers possibly do against three?

We shall see, Kane: We shall see:

Echo Element, deploy as high squadron: Victor Element, fingers four:

Any Earth station: This is Buck Rogers: Emergency transmission:

- Buck, is that you? - Yeah, it's me:

Running about half a light second behind three more me's:

[Chirping] Here comes the cavalry, Wilma:

Twiki! It really is you, Buck! [Buck] Yeah, I think so:

Wilma, you're about to run up against three of the fastest, nastiest ships you've ever seen: : :

Piloted by three duplicates of me:

[Wilma] What are your tactics, Buck? [Buck] Don't close: Don't let them get on your tail:

They'll try to bounce you from the rear quarter: I'm on my way:

They're all over us! We can't hold!

- Alert! One of them has broken through: - Objective?

New Phoenix:

[Zygot Buck] Okay, Buck Rogers: Looks like I win this time:

One more second, no more New Phoenix:

[Buck] Oh, no, you don't:

Hang tough, Wilma:

That's two down: One more to go:

It's your turn to go, bro: Give me your best shot:

All right: Catch:

Boring, Buck: Boring: [Chuckles]

- Your move: Which way are you gonna break? - Just keep your eyes open, son:

Which one?

Which one?

[Chirping] Way to go, Wilma:

You should have known your plan was destined to fail:

The plan was flawless, Princess: It was the execution that failed:

Kane, it was doomed from the start: Believe me:

There's only one Buck Rogers:

Now that is a Ping-Pong table:

[Chirping] I liked the ping-pool better:

Interesting: Yes: I must say it's very interesting:

You wanna play, Doc? Oh, I think not: [Chuckles]

Come on, Doc: I'll show you the ropes: It's easy:

Ball: : : Paddle:

You hit the ball over the net with the paddle:

Here we go again:

Uh, am I holding it correctly? [Buck] That's just fine:

Now when I hit the ball to you, you hit it back, okay? You ready? Here we go:

[Buck] That's, uh, Hey!

- Not bad for a beginner: - Yeah: Rather: Quiet good, actually:

Here we go again:

[Chuckles] You know, uh,

if I didn't know better, I'd think I was being hustled:

Hustled? [Chuckles] What's hustled?

Ah, it's just me, Doc: L-l-I'm kinda beat: I feel like something the dog dragged in:

[Chirping] Cat dragged in, Buck:

[Chirping] Uh-oh:! There's something fishy going on here, folks:

Dr: Huer, it sounds like...

A Zygot malfunction: It can't be:

It just can't be:

Gotcha!

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