Original subtitles

AW!

POOR LITTLE FELLAS.

WHEN I THINK OF THEIR CHILDHOOD,

ALL THOSE CUTE LITTLE MAGGOTS.

HA HA HA!

OUR STORY IS ABOUT

A MAN WITH NOBLER AMBITIONS.

HE LIKES TO KILL HUMAN PESTS,

AND HE DOES IT IN FRONT OF AN AUDIENCE.

NOW, THAT'S ENTERTAINMENT!

HA HA HA!

SO HANG ON TO YOUR HATS, KIDDIES.

THIS ONE'S A REAL SHOCKER!

[CARNIVAL MUSIC PLAYING]

Niles Talbot: THIS HERE IS CHARLIE LEDBETTER,

SITTING IN HIS CELL OUT AT THE STATE PENITENTIARY.

IT'S LONG ABOUT MIDNIGHT.

CHARLIE'S GOING TO DIE IN A FEW MINUTES.

ONE THING MR. LEDBETTER AIN'T THINKIN' ABOUT

IS JOE SAYLOR, HIS OLD BOSS.

YOU SEE, ONE DAY, CHARLIE HAD A HALF-PINT OF VODKA FOR LUNCH.

HE GOT TO THINKING ABOUT

HOW THEY TURNED HIM DOWN WHEN HE WANTED THAT RAISE.

NOW, HE FELT REAL BAD ABOUT THAT, OLD CHARLIE DID.

HE'D BEEN WORKING THERE FOR ABOUT 7 YEARS,

AND HE DIDN'T HAVE TOO MUCH TO SHOW FOR IT.

SO HE WENT DOWN AND GOT HIS COLD BLUE .44

OUT OF THE GLOVE BOX OF HIS CHEVY

AND TOOK IT UP TO MR. SAYLOR'S OFFICE.

2 SLUGS WENT INTO SAYLOR.

3 WENT WILD.

THE LAST ONE WENT RIGHT THROUGH A GLASS WALL

INTO A SECRETARY WHO WAS PASSIN' BY.

[CHARLIE SHOUTING AND RESISTING]

GOT HER RIGHT BEHIND THE EAR.

KILLED HER BIG AS HELL.

KIND OF A LUCKY SHOT REALLY.

ABOUT THE ONLY KIND OF LUCK CHARLIE LEDBETTER EVER HAD.

I GUESS RIGHT ABOUT NOW

CHARLIE LEDBETTER'S STARTING TO THINK PRETTY SERIOUS

ABOUT THAT VALLEY OF DEATH.

HE'S THINKING ABOUT THAT RUBBER DIAPER THEY GIVE HIM TO WEAR,

WONDERING IF HE'S GONNA CRAP ALL OVER HIMSELF

WHEN I JUICE HIM IN A COUPLE MINUTES.

[DOOR SLAMS]

HE WILL.

NO!

[PRIEST READING FROM BIBLE]

IT AIN'T RIGHT.

IT AIN'T RIGHT!

Niles: FIRST THING YOU GOT TO UNDERSTAND IS

WHEN IT'S THEIR TIME,

ALL THESE BIG, TOUGH GUYS GO YELLOW,

CRYING AND HOLLERING AND SCREAMING,

BLUBBERING, "THE GOVERNOR'S GOING TO CALL," AND ALL THAT.

I BEEN HERE 12 YEARS,

AND THE GOVERNOR AIN'T CALLED YET.

PEOPLE SAY THE DAMNEDEST THINGS ABOUT ELECTROCUTIONS.

THEY SAY YOUR EYEBALLS POP OUT.

THEY SAY BLACK BLOOD COMES OUT YOUR MOUTH.

THEY SAY YOU GET ALL FOAMY LIKE A RABID DOG.

ALL THAT'S BULLSHIT.

IT AIN'T TRUE AT ALL.

NICE THING ABOUT ELECTRICITY IS IT'S CLEAN.

OF COURSE, I HAVE SEEN A FEW HEADS SMOKE

AFTER IT WAS ALL OVER.

A SMOKIN' HEAD AIN'T VERY PRETTY.

NO!

NO!

[SCREAMING AND SOBBING]

[PRIEST READING]

NO!

WAIT A MINUTE!

JUST WAIT A MINUTE!

HE'S GOING TO CALL!

THE GOVERNOR'S GOING TO CALL!

HE'S GOING TO GIVE ME A STAY!

YES, HE WILL!

NO! NO!

THE GOVERNOR'S GOING TO CALL!

HE'S GOT TO!

HE'S GOT TO!

OH, KNOCK IT OFF, CHARLIE.

QUIT BEING SO DAMN CHICKENSHIT.

YOU KILLED SOMEBODY.

NOW YOU'RE GOING TO DO THE HOT SQUAT.

IT ALL EVENS OUT, DON'T IT, BABY?

Charlie: WHY YOU DOIN' THIS?!

YOU KNOW, PEOPLE TELL ME MOST EXECUTIONERS

NEVER LOOK THE PRISONERS IN THE EYE,

AFRAID THEY'RE GONNA GET SPOOKED OR SOMETHING.

NOT ME.

I ALWAYS LOOK.

AH!

[THINKING] OK, MR. LEDBETTER.

NOW YOU'RE ALL READY FOR YOUR REGULATION 2 JOLTS

THE STATE REQUIRES.

[SOBBING]

I THINK WE SHOULD PROCEED, NILES.

THERE'S BEEN NO WORD FROM THE GOVERNOR.

YES, SIR. WE'RE ALL SET.

Priest: LET US PRAY.

"AS I ENTER HERE,

"WITH A SENSE OF MY OWN UNWORTHINESS...

[CRYING]

"MAY THE BLESSINGS OF GOD IN UNMIXED JOY..."

NO!

IT'S NOT RIGHT!

NO!

NO!

IT AIN'T RIGHT!

[ELECTRICITY SURGES]

"UNWORTHY THOUGH I BE,

"MAY MY ENTRY BE BLESSED

"BY YOU WHO ARE HOLY,

"YOU WHO ARE MERCIFUL,

YOU WHO ABIDE..."

Niles: THEY SAY ELECTRIC CURRENT'S SO FAST

THE BRAIN GETS COOKED

JUST AS SOON AS THE SWITCH IS THROWED.

PRISONER NEVER FEELS A THING.

I'D HATE TO THINK THAT WAS TRUE.

I'M A COUNTRY BOY, BUT I LIKE THE CITY.

YOU KNOW? IT'S BIG. IT'S DIRTY.

LETS YOU KNOW WHAT IT REALLY IS.

AND AT NIGHT, THERE'S ALL THOSE LIGHTS.

IT'S REAL PRETTY, ISN'T IT?

MY NAME'S NILES TALBOT.

I BEEN THE EXECUTIONER IN THIS STATE

FOR THE LAST 12 YEARS.

WHEN I GOT HERE FROM OKLAHOMA,

I CAUGHT ON AS AN ELECTRICIAN,

THEN AFTER A WHILE, I GOT A JOB OUT TO THE PRISON,

TAKING CARE OF THE GENERATORS.

I LIKE ELECTRICITY.

IT'S DEPENDABLE.

YOU CAN TRUST IT.

A LOT OF STATES DO IT WITH GAS

OR WITH SOME LETHAL INJECTION.

I DON'T TAKE TO THAT.

THAT'S HOW YOU KILL A DOG OR A CAT OR SOMETHING,

NOT A MAN.

IT'S GOT TO BE THE OL' ELECTRIC CHAIR FOR ME.

Female reporter, on TV: SPECIAL AGENTS CALLED COYOTE BUSTERS.

THE EFFORT, WHICH OFTEN INCLUDES

AGENTS IN THE DRUG ENFORCEMENT ADMINISTRATION,

THE FBI, AND OTHER...

YEAH?

CHEESE SANDWICH AND A CUP OF COFFEE, BLACK.

Female reporter: ELSEWHERE TODAY,

THE LEGISLATURE IS PREPARED TO VOTE

WHETHER OR NOT TO RESCIND THE DEATH PENALTY IN THIS STATE,

ONLY A FEW HOURS

AFTER THE EXECUTION OF CHARLES LEDBETTER.

OPPONENTS OF THE BILL CLAIM THE DEATH PENALTY

HAS PROVEN AN EFFECTIVE DETERRENT AGAINST VIOLENT CRIME,

AND ITS ABOLITION WILL ONLY PUSH THE CRIME RATE HIGHER

AND PRODUCE MORE OVERCROWDING IN OUR PRISONS.

MANY ALSO CLAIM THAT EXECUTION IS STILL MURDER

IN THE EYES OF GOD.

I'M TERRIBLY SORRY, NILES.

HEY, LISTEN, IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT.

NOTHING YOU COULD DO.

I GOT TO ADMIT,

THE DAMN THING CAUGHT ME BY SURPRISE.

IF YOU'D LIKE,

I CAN WRITE YOU A LETTER OF RECOMMENDATION.

WELL, I WAS KIND OF HOPING

I'D GET MY OLD JOB BACK.

I MEAN, YOU STILL NEED SOMEBODY

TO LOOK AFTER THE GENERATORS

DOWN AT THE POWERHOUSE.

WE ALREADY HAVE SOMEONE FOR THAT, NILES.

YOU REMEMBER. YOU TRAINED HIM.

LISTEN, I'VE BEEN WORKING HERE A LOT OF YEARS.

I MEAN, 2 IN THE ELECTRIC SHOP.

ANOTHER 12 THROWING THE SWITCH FOR THE STATE.

DON'T SENIORITY COUNT FOR SOMETHING?

IT'S NOT THAT, NILES.

IT'S JUST THAT, UH...

WELL, WE THOUGHT IT WOULDN'T BE GOOD

TO HAVE YOU AROUND THE PRISONERS.

I MEAN, THEY ALL KNOW WHAT YOU DID.

I MEAN, THEY ALL KNEW YOU WERE THE MAN WHO...

IT COULD GET PRETTY UGLY.

LISTEN, IT'S NOTHING I CAN'T HANDLE.

SOMEBODY GETS OUT OF LINE,

I CAN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.

I CAN'T LET IT COME TO THAT, NILES.

I'M SURE IF YOU THINK ABOUT IT, YOU'LL UNDERSTAND.

YEAH, I UNDERSTAND.

I GUESS THIS AIN'T THE KIND OF WORK

THEY GIVE YOU A GOLD WATCH FOR, IS IT?

Niles: ONE THING A MAN NEEDS IS A FRIEND,

SOMEONE TO TALK TO WHEN YOU'RE FEELING DOWN AND OUT.

I SUPPOSE THAT'S WHY THEY INVENTED BARS, YOU KNOW?

YOU CAN NURSE A DRINK, THINK THINGS OVER,

HAVE A LITTLE CHAT.

ALL OF A SUDDEN,

THINGS AIN'T QUITE AS BAD AS THEY SEEM.

MOST BARROOM CONVERSATIONS IS EITHER ABOUT BASEBALL,

FOOTBALL, BOXING, OR PUSSY.

BUT WITH ME, IT'S DIFFERENT.

PEOPLE USUALLY WANT TO TALK TO ME ABOUT MY JOB.

I GUESS I OUGHT TO SAY MY EX-JOB.

THIS ONE'S ON ME, MR. TALBOT.

IT'S GODDAMN CRIMINAL.

I CAN'T BELIEVE THOSE CHICKENSHIT POLITICIANS

REALLY DID IT.

ALL THOSE YEARS OF SERVICE,

AND THEY CANNED YOU

LIKE YOU WERE SOME FUCKING GUINEA OFF THE BOAT.

I HATE TO SEE TALENT GO TO WASTE.

IT'S A FUCKING SHAME.

THANK YOU, VIC. YOU'RE A REAL BUDDY.

THEY'RE DOING LOTS OF SHOWS ON TV

ABOUT THE WHOLE THING.

TV PEOPLE DON'T KNOW NOTHIN'.

THEY WANT TO DO SOMETHING GOOD,

WHAT THEY REALLY OUGHT TO DO IS

THEY OUGHT TO PUT A LOT OF LITTLE TVs

IN ALL THE CELLS OF ALL THE PRISONS,

YOU KNOW, CLOSED CIRCUIT?

SO THAT ALL THE GUYS WHO'S LOCKED UP

CAN WATCH THEIR BUDDY WHEN HE GETS COOKED.

THAT MIGHT BE A REAL EDUCATION.

HELL, I'D WATCH IT.

THERE WAS THIS EDITORIAL ON TV,

AND THE COMMENTATOR WAS SAYING

HOW IF THEY TELEVISED EXECUTIONS,

THE WHOLE COUNTRY WOULD JUST STOP THE DEATH PENALTY.

THEY'D ALL BE TOO SICK FROM IT.

THEY WOULDN'T LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN.

FUCKING GUYS ON TV. WHAT DO THEY KNOW?

LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING.

IF THEY PUT EXECUTIONS ON TV,

IT'D BE THE FUCKING HIGHEST-RATED SHOW

OF ALL TIME.

NIELSENS THROUGH THE ROOF.

OTHER NETWORKS WOULD START KILLING PEOPLE

JUST TO COMPETE.

PRETTY SOON, GERALDO RIVERA

WOULD BE PULLING THAT SWITCH.

[INAUDIBLE]

[INAUDIBLE]

IT'S ALL A BIG FOOD CHAIN.

WE EAT SHIT, AND THE SHIT EATS US.

THEY CANNED ME FROM MY JOB

BECAUSE THEY'RE AFRAID OF ME.

THEY'RE AFRAID OF DEATH.

THEY DON'T SEE IT'S ALL AROUND THEM.

IT'S A DISEASE.

YOU EAT IT, DRINK IT. YOU BREATHE IT. YOU FUCK IT.

WE'RE ALL PREGNANT WITH IT.

IT'S GROWING INSIDE ALL OF US,

LIKE THEM, OVER THERE.

YOU SEE THOSE 2 JUNKIES?

PITIFUL BASTARDS, AIN'T THEY?

I'LL TELL YOU SOMETHING, THOUGH.

IN A WAY, I RESPECT THEM.

THEY'RE HONEST.

THEY SPEND ALL THE MONEY THEY CAN GET

JUST TO SHOOT A LITTLE DEATH INTO THEIR ARMS,

JUST FOR A THRILL,

JUST TO GET A LITTLE TASTE OF THE GRAVE.

SEE, THEY KNOW DEATH IS COMING.

THEY TEASE IT.

I LIKE THAT.

COURSE, AT THE SAME TIME, JUNKIES ARE SHIT,

TWO-BIT CRIMINALS.

UPON EXAMINATION OF SWORN TESTIMONY,

IT WOULD APPEAR THAT THE STATE HAS A STRONG CASE

FOR THE PROSECUTION OF JAMES FLOOD

FOR THE CRIME OF MURDER.

HOWEVER, HAVING REVIEWED THE DISTRICT ATTORNEY'S CASE,

I FIND THAT THE WARRANT FOR ARREST

HAS BEEN IMPROPERLY WORDED.

I'M AFRAID I MUST RULE THAT THERE ARE NO GROUNDS

ON WHICH TO PROSECUTE JAMES FLOOD.

MR. FLOOD, YOU ARE FREE TO LEAVE.

YEAH! HA HA HA!

Prosecutor: YOUR HONOR, I OBJECT.

THIS IS A TRAVESTY OF JUSTICE!

BECAUSE OF A SIMPLE CLERICAL ERROR,

YOU'RE LETTING THIS MAN GO FREE.

ORDER IN THE COURT. THIS CASE IS DISMISSED.

YOUR HONOR, I WOULD LIKE TO PETITION IMMEDIATELY

TO THE APPELLATE COURT FOR A REVIEW.

ORDER IN THIS COURT!

ORDER IN THE COURT!

YOU SON OF A BITCH! YOU KILLED MY BROTHER!

GET OFF MY BACK, WILL YA?

YOUR BROTHER WAS A FAG!

HEY, THERE, BITCH.

YOU'RE A MURDERER!

MURDERER!

MURDERER!

I GOT NOTHING SPECIAL AGAINST BIKERS.

HELL, I USED TO OWN A HOG ONCE UPON A TIME.

BIKERS BELIEVE IN FREEDOM.

THEY DON'T WANT NOBODY TO LEAN ON THEM,

AND THEY DON'T GIVE A GOOD GOD DAMN

WHAT POLITE SOCIETY THINKS OF THEM.

SEE, THEY FIGURE THEY'RE THROWBACKS TO REAL AMERICANS.

YOU KNOW, WHAT THE COUNTRY WAS ALL ABOUT

BEFORE IT ALL WENT TO HELL,

WITH BIG-CITY LAWYERS AND COMPUTERS

AND CORPORATIONS AND TIME CLOCKS AND WHAT ALL.

THERE'S A LOT TO BE SAID FOR THAT.

THOSE AIN'T BAD IDEAS.

BUT THIS BIKER JIMMY FLOOD...

NOW, HE WENT WAY OUT OF LINE.

AND HE OUGHT TO PAY.

AAH!

[SCREAMING CONTINUES]

AAH!

AUTHORITIES BELIEVE A SHORT CIRCUIT

MAY HAVE BEEN RESPONSIBLE FOR THE FREAK ACCIDENT

WHICH CLAIMED THE LIFE OF ALLEGED MURDERER JIMMY FLOOD.

FLOOD, OFTEN CHARACTERIZED IN THE PRESS

AS A MOTORCYCLE HOODLUM...

CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT?

AND SOME PEOPLE SAY THERE'S NO GOD.

SURE THERE'S A GOD. NO DOUBT ABOUT IT.

PROBLEM IS HE SPENDS TOO MUCH TIME

MAKING ASSHOLES LIKE THAT BIKER.

I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN.

HE LOOKS LIKE A REAL CREEP TO ME.

YOU KNOW HOW ON TV THEY GET THESE EXPERTS,

YOU KNOW, THE ACLU TYPES?

AND THEY'RE ALWAYS SAYING

THAT IT'S ONLY THE MINORITIES

THAT GET THE CHAIR. YOU EVER NOTICE THAT?

THEY'RE ALL PRETTY DARK WHEN I GET DONE WITH THEM, VIC.

YEAH? HA HA HA!

WILL THE DEFENDANTS PLEASE RISE?

WILL THE JURY FOREMAN PLEASE READ THE VERDICT?

IN THE CHARGE OF FIRST-DEGREE MURDER,

WE FIND THE DEFENDANTS,

CYNTHIA BALDWIN AND THEODORE CARNE,

NOT GUILTY.

Judge: THE DEFENDANTS HAVE BEEN FOUND INNOCENT OF ALL CHARGES

AND ARE FREE TO RESUME THEIR PRIVATE LIVES.

THIS COURT IS ADJOURNED.

I'M VERY HAPPY FOR YOU.

IT'S OVER.

OH, THANK GOD.

[SOUND OF SIREN FADES IN]

THIS FELLA CARNE DECIDED TO UNLOAD HIS WIFE

IN FAVOR OF THIS LITTLE HOTSKY THAT HE HAD ON THE SIDE.

BUT HIS OLD LADY HAD ALL THE LOOT IN HER NAME,

SO HE FIGURED DIVORCE WASN'T QUITE GOOD ENOUGH.

I KNOW WHERE HIS HEAD IS AT.

WE ALL DO.

RIGHT DOWN THERE A-TWEEN HIS LEGS.

YOU KNOW, I GOT TO SAY THIS FOR OL' CARNE.

IF YOU'RE GOING TO DO IT,

MAKE SURE SHE'S WORTH DOING IT FOR.

THIS GIRL OF HIS IS AWFUL PRETTY.

COURSE, EVERYBODY KNOWS BEAUTY'S ONLY SKIN-DEEP.

LOOKS JUST DON'T LAST.

HERE.

OH! MY GOD!

WHO ARE YOU?

LOOK, I HAVE 200 BUCKS IN MY WALLET.

IT'S IN MY PANTS IN THE OTHER ROOM.

I HAVE SOME MONEY IN MY PURSE.

PLEASE, TAKE IT. JUST DON'T HURT US.

KEEP IT. I AIN'T HERE FOR YOUR MONEY.

I DON'T GET IT. WHAT DO YOU WANT?

I FIND YOU BOTH GUILTY

OF THE MURDER OF YOUR FORMER WIFE, MR. CARNE.

WERE YOU A FRIEND OF HERS?

WHO ARE YOU?

AND I SENTENCE YOU TO DEATH,

THAT SENTENCE TO BE CARRIED OUT IMMEDIATELY.

Cynthia: WAIT A MINUTE, WAIT A MINUTE!

IT WAS ALL TED'S IDEA!

I DIDN'T KNOW HE WAS GONNA GO THROUGH WITH IT.

SHUT UP, CYNTHIA.

YOU GOTTA BELIEVE ME!

SHUT UP, CYNTHIA!

[ELECTRICITY CRACKLING]

NO! NO! WAIT! WAIT! WAIT!

NO! AAH!

I NEVER HAD NO PROBLEM WITH WOMEN.

IF I WANTED ONE, I JUST WENT OUT AND GOT HER.

EASY PEASY JAPANESEY.

[ROCKABILLY MUSIC PLAYING]

Man: ALL RIGHT!

GIVE ME A BEER, HONEY.

LADIES WANT YOU TO LOVE THEM'S ALL.

THAT'S ALL THEY EVER WANT.

THEY GET THAT FROM THEIR MAMAS

AND FROM ALL THE TRASHY MAGAZINES THEY READ.

IT'S EASY TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH DAMES.

JUST DON'T FALL IN LOVE, AND YOU'RE OK.

YOU GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT, YOU FALL IN LOVE,

THEY'LL KILL YOU.

THEY CAN'T STAND YOU NO MORE.

THEY EITHER DUMP YOU AND MOVE ON,

OR IF THEY LET YOU HANG AROUND,

THEY CUT YOUR BALLS OFF.

WEIRD, AIN'T IT?

NOW, AS FAR AS STRATEGIES FOR GETTING INTO THEIR PANTIES,

THAT'S EASY, TOO.

THE OLD RULE,

YOU TREAT WHORES LIKE QUEENS AND QUEENS LIKE WHORES,

YOU GOT NO PROBLEM.

THEY'RE ON THEIR BACKS

FASTER THAN YOU CAN SAY, "SON OF SAM."

AW, GEE, LOOK AT THOSE HONEYS.

[MAN WHISTLING]

AND UP THERE, WE GOT THE QUEEN BITCH HERSELF.

YES, SIR.

I GOT JUST WHAT THE DOCTOR ORDERED FOR YOU.

YOU MIGHT HAVE FOOLED THAT JURY,

BUT YOU DIDN'T FOOL ME NONE.

I WONDER HOW YOU'RE GOING TO DANCE

WHEN I PUT 10,000 VOLTS THROUGH YOUR ASS?

[NEW SONG BEGINS]

COUPLE OF MINUTES, WE'RE GONNA HAVE OURSELVES

ONE DEAD LITTLE GO-GO DANCER.

WELL, HONEY...

IT'S YOUR TIME.

WHAT THE GODDAMN HELL IS GOING ON HERE?

MR. TALBOT, YOU ARE UNDER ARREST.

YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT.

ANYTHING YOU SAY

CAN AND WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU

IN A COURT OF LAW.

[TELEPHONE RINGS]

[INAUDIBLE]

I GOT SOME GOOD NEWS FOR YOU, MR. TALBOT.

SINCE YOU'RE SUCH A STAUNCH SUPPORTER

OF CAPITAL PUNISHMENT,

YOU'LL BE GLAD TO KNOW THE STATE LEGISLATURE

HAS JUST REINSTATED THE DEATH PENALTY.

AND GUESS WHO'S NOT PULLING THE SWITCH THIS TIME.

Charlie's voice: YEAH! HA HA HA!

DID HE CALL?

DID THE GOVERNOR CALL YET?

LISTEN, IF YOU'D JUST DELAY THIS THING

JUST A COUPLE OF MINUTES.

THAT'S ALL I'M ASKING FOR, JUST A FEW DAMN MINUTES!

COME ON, NOW. I'M NOT LIKE THE OTHER ONES.

YOU KNOW ME.

YOU ALL KNOW ME!

I USED TO WORK HERE, FOR CHRISAKES!

COME ON! I'M TELLING YOU! THE GOVERNOR'S GOING TO CALL!

HE KNOWS WHAT I DONE FOR HIM!

HE KNOWS ABOUT ALL THE RATS

AND ALL THE FUCKING CRUMBS I TOOK CARE OF!

ALL THE SHIT THAT THEY WANTED ME TO GET RID OF!

GODDAMN!

YOU GOTTA LET ME GO, YOU SONS OF BITCHES!

THAT PHONE IS GOING TO RING!

I'M TELLING YOU, HE'S GOING TO CALL!

HE'S GOING TO CALL! HE KNOWS!

WHEN HE DOES, IF YOU JUICE ME BEFORE HE FUCKING CALLS,

YOU'RE ALL GOING TO GET CANNED!

YOU HEAR ME?

YOU SHITHEELS!

I DIDN'T DO NOTHIN' THAT YOU DIDN'T WANT!

I DIDN'T DO NOTHIN' YOU DIDN'T GO ALONG WITH!

ALLS I DID WAS SOMETHING

YOU WERE TOO CHICKENSHIT TO DO YOURSELVES!

YOU MISERABLE CHICKENSHIT BASTARDS!

CHICKENSHIT FUCKERS!

YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!

LET ME OUT OF HERE!

NILES, I'M TERRIBLY SORRY

IT'S COME TO THIS.

IT'S MY JOB.

THAT'S WHY I DID IT. BECAUSE IT'S MY JOB.

IF A MAN AIN'T GOOD AT HIS JOB,

THEN WHAT THE HELL'S HE GOOD FOR?

WHAT'S ANYTHING GOOD FOR?

[PRAYING IN LATIN]

AAH!

[PRIEST CONTINUES PRAYER]

[ELECTRICITY SURGES]

[SWITCH SHUTS OFF]

Niles: I DIDN'T WANT NO HAIRCUT.

THEY SAID THAT WAS A MISTAKE

'CAUSE MY HEAD MIGHT CATCH ON FIRE

FROM THE ELECTRICITY WHEN THEY JUICED ME.

I TOLD THEM, "DON'T WORRY.

THE GOVERNOR'S GOING TO CALL."

DRAT!

WHAT A REVOLTING DEVELOPMENT!

AND WHAT A SWITCH FOR POOR TALBOT.

IT JUST GOES TO SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS

WHEN YOU GET TOO CAUGHT UP IN YOUR WORK.

HA HA HA!

DON'T WORRY, THOUGH.

I'M SURE HE NEVER KNEW "WATT" HIT HIM.

HA HA HA!

SO REMEMBER, BOYS AND GIRLS,

SAFETY FIRST.

HA HA HA!

[COUGHING]

AHH. PUHH!

CAPTIONING MADE POSSIBLE BY WARNER BROS.

CAPTIONED BY THE NATIONAL CAPTIONING INSTITUTE --www.ncicap.org--