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>> O'Brien: TONIGHT ON
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"HOT PACKAGE"...
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OUCH!
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>> Beckles: LOOKS LIKE THERE'S
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NO ENTERTAINMENT NEWS TODAY.
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>> O'Brien: BUT REST ASSURED,
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THE SHOW MUST GO ON.
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>> Beckles: SO TONIGHT IS
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GONNA BE DONATED TO FUN!
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>> HO, HO, HO!
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MERRY CH--
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OH! OH!
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>> Beckles: IT'S THE
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"HOT PACKAGE SOOPER BLOOPER
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SPECIAL," WITH...
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AND BLOOPSIE DROPS BY!
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THEN THERE'S A REAL DOCTOR IN
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THE "WRAP-UP ZONE."
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AND THE BLOOPER COMPUTER'S HERE
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TO MAKE SURE THE BLOOPERS ARE
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FUN!
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AND WE'LL HAVE YOUR TOP-THREE
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FAVORITE BLOOPERS OF THE WEEK.
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THEN...
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YOU WILL NOT BELIEVE WHAT I
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COULD BELIEVE WHEN YOU
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DISBELIEVE WHO I'M TALKING TO
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TODAY ABOUT THEIR NEW HOME.
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ALL THOSE BLOOPS AND MORE ON A
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VERY SPECIAL BLOOPER EDITION OF
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"HOT PACKAGE."
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>> O'Brien: YOU'RE WATCHING
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"HOT PACKAGE," THE BEST AND ONLY
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CURRENT ENTERTAINMENT-NEWS
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PROGRAMMING.
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>> Beckles: NOW HERE'S DERRICK!
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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OH, MAN.
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WELCOME BACK, NORTH AMERICA, TO
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THIS VERY SPECIAL BLOOPER
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EDITION OF "HOT PACKAGE."
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I'M HERE WITH BLOOPER VETERAN
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PERRY CARAVELLO AND MY MAIN MAN
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PAT O'BRIEN.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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OH, MAN.
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>> Roark: BUT REMEMBER, WITH
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GREAT BLOOPERS COMES GREAT
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RESPONSIBILITY.
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LET'S BOW OUR HEADS IN PRAYER.
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HEAVENLY FATHER, THANK YOU FOR
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THE BLOOPERS PROVIDED FOR US
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TONIGHT.
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>> Beckles: PAT, STOP.
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>> Roark: FORGIVE US OUR
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BLOOPERS.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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>> Beckles: OH, MAN.
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>> O'Brien: OKAY, I'M STARVING.
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>> Beckles: YES.
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>> O'Brien: I DEFINITELY SMELL
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SOME FRESHLY BAKED BLOOPERS.
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LET'S EAT!
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PERRY, WANT TO DO THE HONORS?
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>> WELL, YOU GOT IT.
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NUTS, ANYONE?
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[ SLIP! BANG! BANG! ]
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>> UNH!
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[ GROANING ]
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>> WHAT AM I GONNA DO WITH YOU,
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YOU SILLY?
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>> THANK YOU, MOMMY.
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[ ALARM BLARING ]
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>> O'Brien: WOW.
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NOT EXACTLY A WOW, MAN.
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IT WAS KIND OF CRUEL.
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>> Beckles: YEAH.
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ANYWAY, THIS BUSINESSMAN BRINGS
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A WHOLE NEW MEANING TO "HEAD
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OFFICE."
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>> NO, PLEASE!
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AAH!
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[ WOMEN SCREAM ]
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>> OH, THAT'S THE BOMB!
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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>> Beckles: OH, MAN.
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LET'S POP A TAPE IN THIS GIZMO
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AND CHECK OUT A NEW
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"HOT PACKAGE" PRACTICAL JOKE.
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>> O'Brien: GOOD CALL, MY MAN.
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>> Beckles: ALL RIGHT.
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[BLEEP]
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[BLEEP]
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UH...
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>> AAH! AAH!
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>> IS THIS YOUR STUDIO?
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>> NO, THIS IS MY CAVE.
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THIS IS WHERE I PLAY.
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>> WITH THIS KNIFE, I WILL STAB
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YOU IN THE NAME OF COCAMANTIS.
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WHEN I SEE YOUR BLOOD, ONLY THEN
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WILL I MAKE LOVE TO YOU.
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ONLY THEN WILL I SEND YOU TO
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HIM.
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[ HORN BLOWS ]
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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>> Beckles: STICK AROUND FOR
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YOUR FAVORITE THREE BLOOPERS OF
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THE WEEK.
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TIME FOR SOME LAUGHS AND GAFFS
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WITH MY BUDDY BLOOPSIE!
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SO, BLOOPSIE, WHERE ARE YOU?
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>> RIGHT HERE!
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BLOOP OF THE MORNING TO YOU,
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DERRICK!
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>> Beckles: THERE YOU ARE.
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ALL RIGHT, LET'S GET DOWN TO
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BUSINESS.
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>> [ LAUGHS ] OKAY.
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NUTS, ANYONE?
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[ SPITS ]
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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>> OH, THAT'S THE BOMB!
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>> THIS NEXT CLIP IS A REAL
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HEARTWARMING STORY.
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[ SPITS ]
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>> MY DAD THREW UP ABOUT 20
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OXYCONTINS 'CAUSE MY CAR
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WOULDN'T START, SO WE HAD TO
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CALL AAA, AND MY DAD'S GOT AAA
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AND HE HAD TO BE PRESENT.
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I GUESS HE WANTED TO DIE ON MY
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FRONT PORCH, BUT BEFORE I WALKED
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UP THERE, I SAID A PRAYER.
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I SAID, "PLEASE, IN THE NAME OF
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JESUS, I PRAY THAT MY DAD
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DOESN'T OVERDOSE ON HIS PILLS."
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AND HE HAD TO BE PRESENT WHEN
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THE AAA TOW TRUCK GOT THERE.
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THEN WHEN HE GOT THERE, RIGHT
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BEFORE THEY GOT THERE, HE THREW
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UP, AND THERE WAS ABOUT 20 PILLS
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IN THE SNOW BY MY FRONT PORCH,
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AND I HAD TO PICK THEM OUT TO
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SEE WHAT THEY WERE, AND THEY
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SAID "O.C., 40 MILLIGRAMS."
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>> AND WHAT DID YOU DO WITH
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THESE PILLS?
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>> I SAVED THEM.
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AND I TOOK SOME.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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>> Beckles: WAIT ONE
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OXYCONTIN-PICKING MINUTE.
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I THINK SHE MEANT TO CALL N.A.,
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NOT AAA.
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>> I'VE GOT ONE MORE!
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>> Beckles: DON'T!
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>> COME ON!
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>> Beckles: STOP!
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>> "DON'T STOP?"
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OKAY!
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WAIT TILL YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS
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WHEN THESE TWO KIDS FIND A DEAD
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BODY.
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>> Beckles: WHOA! NOT SO FAST,
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NOT SO FAST!
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TIME FOR SOME HOME-AUDIENCE
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BLOOPERS THAT SOMEONE JUST
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DELIVERED TO US.
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[ LAUGHTER ]
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[ BABY CRIES ]
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>> [ VOMITS ]
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>> Beckles: [ LAUGHS ]
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>> O'Brien: OOPS!
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[ BOTH LAUGH ]
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>> CLASSIC.
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>> O'Brien: YOU KNOW WHAT?
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THAT'S THE BOMB.
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>> THAT'S THE BOMB!
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>> PLEASE TELL ME THERE'S MORE
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WHERE THAT CAME FROM.
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>> Beckles: OH! I THINK WE CAN
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BLOOP A FEW MORE WHERE THAT
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CAME FROM.
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HERE'S A CLASSIC MOVIE OUTTAKE
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SUPER BLOOPER.
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TAKE A LOOK.
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>> SON OF A BITCH!
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>> Beckles: [ LAUGHS ]
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>> AAH!
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>> Beckles: [ LAUGHS ]
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ALL RIGHT, WHAT DO WE HAVE NEXT?
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PERRY, HOPEFULLY, YOU HAVE A
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CLIP THE BLOOPER COMPUTER WILL
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LIKE.
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>> OH, MAN.
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DON'T "LEAF" YOUR CAR
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UNATTENDED.
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[ CHAIN-SAW MOTOR REVVING ]
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>> [BLEEP]
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OH, MY GOD!
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OH-HO!
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[ ALARM BLARING ]
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>> Beckles: UH, WOW.
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THAT IS TWO, PERRY.
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THAT IS TWO, OKAY?
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TIME FOR A VERY SPECIAL
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"ONES ON ONE."
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HE'S HEADSTRONG, GUTSY, AND
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FOCUSED -- A HOMEOWNER,
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ENTREPRENEUR, MODEL, AND
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COMEDIAN CAPABLE OF SERVING UP
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HIS OWN BLOOPERS AND PRACTICAL
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JOKES.
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OF COURSE, I'M TALKING ABOUT
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MYSELF, DERRICK BECKLES.
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AND YOU WON'T BELIEVE THE
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SHOCKING CONFESSIONS I GOT OUT
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OF ME.
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TELL ME ABOUT YOUR EXPERIENCE
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WITH BLOOPERS.
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MY EXPERIENCE WITH BLOOPERS IS
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THIS -- LIFE IS A BLOOPER.
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[ LAUGHS ]
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YOU HAVE THIS FANTASTIC PLACE IN
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ASPEN.
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YOU ACTUALLY DESIGNED IT
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YOURSELF, YOU BUILT IT WITH
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YOUR OWN TWO HANDS.
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I DIDN'T, I DIDN'T --
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YES.
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I NEEDED TO KNOW MORE ABOUT HIS
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HOUSE, AND I STARTED FEELING
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LIKE A REAL-ESTATE SECRET AGENT.
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>> I HAD THE HOME BROKEN UP INTO
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DIFFERENT ROOMS.
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THERE'S AN UPSTAIRS.
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THERE'S A DOWNSTAIRS.
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THERE'S EVEN A DOWNSTAIRS BELOW
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THE DOWNSTAIRS.
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THERE'S A HUGE POOL.
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THERE'S A PLACE I CAN PARK MY
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CAR.
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THE KITCHEN IS, AGAIN, ONE OF
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MY --
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THAT'S MY BABY, IS THE KITCHEN.
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TELL ME MORE, TELL ME MORE.
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DISHWASHER.
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WHOA.
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WHAT THEY CAN DO WITH KITCHENS
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NOWADAYS, IT'S INCREDIBLE.
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IT SOUNDS LIKE IT HAS SO MANY
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THINGS.
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IT HAS A TABLE. IT HAS CHAIRS.
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THERE'S EVEN SOME CUPBOARDS THAT
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YOU HAVE DISHES IN.
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IF YOU WALK INTO THE MAIN --
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THERE'S FOUR ENTRANCES TO MY
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KITCHEN.
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WHEN YOU WALK INTO THE MAIN
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ENTRANCE, WHICH IS AN ARCHWAY,
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YOU'RE GONNA WALK IN THERE AND
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YOU'RE GONNA SEE A TABLE,
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THERE'S CHAIRS, THERE'S A PLACE
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FOR PEOPLE TO SIT.
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I EVEN HAVE A RACK FOR MY PAPER
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TOWELS.
268
00:08:01,281 --> 00:08:03,051
UH, THERE'S A STOVE.
269
00:08:03,050 --> 00:08:05,450
THERE'S AN ISLAND OF MY DREAMS
270
00:08:05,452 --> 00:08:07,562
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE KITCHEN.
271
00:08:07,555 --> 00:08:09,115
SO I'LL CHOP VEGETABLES THERE.
272
00:08:09,122 --> 00:08:10,722
LET'S SAY I'M PREPARING CHICKEN.
273
00:08:10,724 --> 00:08:12,294
I'LL TAKE THE CHICKEN OUT OF THE
274
00:08:12,292 --> 00:08:13,892
REFRIGERATOR, PUT THE CHICKEN ON
275
00:08:13,894 --> 00:08:15,404
THE ISLAND AND START PREPARING
276
00:08:15,395 --> 00:08:15,825
THAT.
277
00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:16,499
[ LAUGHS ]
278
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:17,696
WHAT ADVICE WOULD YOU GIVE
279
00:08:17,698 --> 00:08:19,028
ANYBODY WHO'S TRYING TO BREAK
280
00:08:19,032 --> 00:08:19,732
INTO THE BUSINESS?
281
00:08:19,733 --> 00:08:21,403
I'M HOPING NO ONE BREAKS INTO MY
282
00:08:21,401 --> 00:08:21,971
HOUSE.
283
00:08:21,969 --> 00:08:23,439
IT IS BEAUTIFUL.
284
00:08:23,436 --> 00:08:25,366
AS FOR HOLLYWOOD, I WOULD SAY
285
00:08:25,372 --> 00:08:27,512
WHAT PEOPLE NEED TO REMEMBER IS,
286
00:08:27,507 --> 00:08:29,937
IT'S A TOUGH TOWN, BUT MORE THAN
287
00:08:29,943 --> 00:08:31,953
THAT, IT'S A CARING TOWN.
288
00:08:31,945 --> 00:08:33,775
IT'S A COMMUNITY, AND IF YOU
289
00:08:33,781 --> 00:08:35,681
RESPECT THAT, YOU RESPECT THE
290
00:08:35,683 --> 00:08:37,353
PEOPLE IN HOLLYWOOD, THEY'RE
291
00:08:37,350 --> 00:08:38,550
GONNA RESPECT YOU BACK, AND IT'S
292
00:08:38,552 --> 00:08:39,652
GONNA BE -- YOU'RE GONNA HAVE
293
00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:41,523
FRIENDS FOR LIFE.
294
00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:42,921
[ LAUGHS ]
295
00:08:42,923 --> 00:08:44,393
IF DERRICK BECKLES IS ANY
296
00:08:44,391 --> 00:08:46,061
INDICATION OF THE WARMTH THAT
297
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:47,799
YOU CAN FIND IN HOLLYWOOD, I'M
298
00:08:47,795 --> 00:08:49,855
GONNA HAVE A FRIEND FOR LIFE.
299
00:08:49,863 --> 00:08:53,333
BECAUSE THIS GUY'S THE BOMB.
300
00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:55,973
>> OH, THAT'S THE BOMB!
301
00:08:55,969 --> 00:08:57,669
>> O'Brien: THAT WAS THE BOMB.
302
00:08:57,671 --> 00:08:59,241
[ LAUGHTER ]
303
00:08:59,239 --> 00:09:00,369
>> Beckles: THANKS, MY MAN.
304
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:01,543
>> O'Brien: ALL RIGHT, PERRY,
305
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:02,811
WANT TO TRY THIS AGAIN, DAWG?
306
00:09:02,810 --> 00:09:04,680
>> UH, THESE LITTLE GUYS HAVE
307
00:09:04,678 --> 00:09:06,708
OBVIOUSLY NEVER HEARD THE PHRASE
308
00:09:06,714 --> 00:09:09,154
"CURIOSITY GETS THE KITTEN."
309
00:09:09,149 --> 00:09:11,119
[ UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYS ]
310
00:09:22,262 --> 00:09:23,602
[ ALARM BLARING ]
311
00:09:23,597 --> 00:09:28,067
[BLEEP] DAMN IT!
312
00:09:28,068 --> 00:09:29,438
>> Beckles: ALL RIGHT, PERRY,
313
00:09:29,436 --> 00:09:30,936
LET'S GO TO THE WRAP-UP ZONE AND
314
00:09:30,938 --> 00:09:32,508
FIND OUT WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU.
315
00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:35,005
>> O'Brien: OH, GOOD LUCK.
316
00:09:35,008 --> 00:09:36,008
>> Beckles: TIME TO GO TO
317
00:09:36,009 --> 00:09:37,079
THE WRAP-UP ZONE AND TALK TO A
318
00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:38,747
REAL DOCTOR ABOUT PERRY.
319
00:09:38,746 --> 00:09:40,076
THANKS SO MUCH FOR BEING HERE.
320
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:41,350
WE SAW SOMEBODY IN ONE OF THE
321
00:09:41,348 --> 00:09:42,548
BLOOPERS GETTING HIT IN THE
322
00:09:42,549 --> 00:09:43,119
NUTS.
323
00:09:43,116 --> 00:09:45,016
HOW SERIOUS CAN THAT BE?
324
00:09:45,018 --> 00:09:46,118
>> THAT CAN BE EXTREMELY
325
00:09:46,119 --> 00:09:46,619
SERIOUS.
326
00:09:46,620 --> 00:09:47,990
YOU CAN END UP WITH A SITUATION
327
00:09:47,988 --> 00:09:49,318
WHERE THE TESTICLE ACTUALLY BE
328
00:09:49,322 --> 00:09:51,192
TWISTED -- THEY CALL THAT
329
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:52,361
TORSION -- AND THAT CAN ACTUALLY
330
00:09:52,359 --> 00:09:53,359
CAUSE THE TESTICLE TO DIE.
331
00:09:53,360 --> 00:09:54,230
>> Roark: SO SCARY.
332
00:09:54,227 --> 00:09:55,357
>> IT IS. IT'S FRIGHTENING.
333
00:09:55,362 --> 00:09:56,532
>> Beckles: IS IT A BLOOPER OR
334
00:09:56,529 --> 00:09:57,769
NOT A BLOOPER, IN YOUR OPINION?
335
00:09:57,765 --> 00:09:58,865
>> IT'S DEFINITELY NOT A
336
00:09:58,866 --> 00:09:59,366
BLOOPER.
337
00:09:59,366 --> 00:10:00,426
>> Roark: DERRICK, I HAVE A
338
00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:01,103
CONCERN.
339
00:10:01,101 --> 00:10:02,801
DOCTOR, THE KITTEN WE WITNESSED
340
00:10:02,803 --> 00:10:04,573
EARLIER, WHAT IF IT FELL OFF THE
341
00:10:04,571 --> 00:10:05,441
MOTORCYCLE?
342
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:06,508
>> OH, MY GOSH.
343
00:10:06,506 --> 00:10:08,036
I MEAN, THE ODDS OF THAT CAT
344
00:10:08,041 --> 00:10:09,541
LANDING ON ALL FOUR PAWS IS
345
00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:10,612
REMOTE.
346
00:10:10,610 --> 00:10:11,710
YOU COULD END UP WITH A
347
00:10:11,712 --> 00:10:12,882
PARALYZED OR A DEAD CAT.
348
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:13,950
>> Beckles: BLOOPER OR NOT A
349
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:14,477
BLOOPER?
350
00:10:14,481 --> 00:10:15,081
>> NOT A BLOOPER.
351
00:10:15,082 --> 00:10:15,922
>> Roark: OH, MY GOODNESS.
352
00:10:15,916 --> 00:10:16,876
>> Beckles: HE LAUGHS AT THIS
353
00:10:16,884 --> 00:10:17,924
KIND OF THING ALL THE TIME.
354
00:10:17,918 --> 00:10:18,618
>> I'M NOT LAUGHING.
355
00:10:18,618 --> 00:10:19,718
>> HE HAS TO UNDERSTAND THE
356
00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:20,820
SERIOUSNESS OF SOME OF THESE
357
00:10:20,821 --> 00:10:21,221
THINGS.
358
00:10:21,221 --> 00:10:22,421
>> I'M GONNA BUTT IN RIGHT NOW
359
00:10:22,422 --> 00:10:24,662
BECAUSE, ANASTASIA, YOU WERE
360
00:10:24,658 --> 00:10:26,928
ABOUT TO START CRYING, AND I
361
00:10:26,927 --> 00:10:29,427
DON'T WANT ANY PROBLEMS TO START
362
00:10:29,429 --> 00:10:30,099
HAPPENING.
363
00:10:30,097 --> 00:10:33,197
I MEAN, IF I LOST A TESTICLE,
364
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:34,530
THAT WOULD BE -- THAT WOULD BE
365
00:10:34,534 --> 00:10:36,374
THE WORLD'S WORST.
366
00:10:36,369 --> 00:10:38,339
IT WOULD BE THE WORLD'S WORST.
367
00:10:42,009 --> 00:10:43,139
>> UNH!
368
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,383
>> O'Brien: BLOOPS!
369
00:10:44,377 --> 00:10:46,277
[ LAUGHTER ]
370
00:10:46,279 --> 00:10:47,549
GOOD NIGHT, NORTH AMERICA, AND
371
00:10:47,547 --> 00:10:48,647
THANKS FOR BEING GRATEFUL.
372
00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:49,678
>> Beckles: HERE'S YOUR TOP
373
00:10:49,683 --> 00:10:50,823
THREE FAVORITE BLOOPERS OF THE
374
00:10:50,818 --> 00:10:51,748
WEEK.
375
00:10:51,752 --> 00:10:52,792
>> O'Brien: BLOOPSIE DAISY!
376
00:10:52,786 --> 00:10:53,816
>> ...AND THE COMPANY SHOULD
377
00:10:53,821 --> 00:10:56,891
HAVE CHECKED THESE TANKS --
378
00:10:56,890 --> 00:11:00,860
[ BOING! ]
379
00:11:00,861 --> 00:11:01,631
>> AAH!
380
00:11:01,628 --> 00:11:02,758
[ GLASS SHATTERS ]
381
00:11:02,763 --> 00:11:04,103
>> REALLY, I SHOULD HAVE CLEANED
382
00:11:04,097 --> 00:11:05,167
UP THE GREASE OVER THERE.
383
00:11:05,165 --> 00:11:06,395
AND THEY SHOULD NEVER PUT THE
384
00:11:06,399 --> 00:11:07,469
DEEP-FRYER SO CLOSE--
385
00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:07,997
AAH!
23696
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