Original subtitles

- ♪ Telling everybody all night that I like you ♪

[upbeat music]

♪ And I really hope you don't mind ♪

♪ I can't fight it ♪

♪ Oh you know why can't I hide it? ♪

♪ Cause I am so excited that I finally decided ♪

- It's perfect right?

- More than perfect.

And just a few more tiny alterations

and this dress will reveal just enough cleavage to be tasteful.

- Okay. I'm not sure if cleavage

is ever tasteful at a wedding.

- Jealousy is such a ugly thing.

- You know what's gonna be ugly?

Your credit card statement.

Hazel, do you really need such an expensive dress?

all: Yes.

- You know what?

I am starting to dislike you less and less, Jango.

- I'll take that.

Hazel is fine, but my goodness, you look amazing.

Right, Bree?

- Absolutely. You look stunning.

- Thank you. Now where's Ari?

- Oh, she should be joining us on Zoom any second now,

but I'm here as her proxy to try on whatever you need.

I'm here for you.

- And I'll go get the seamstress.

Oh, make sure to drink the champagne.

I checked the label. It's the good stuff.

- Okay.

- Oh, how lucky am I? I'm getting married.

I have a big showcase tomorrow night,

which neither of you bitches have bothered to RSVP.

- Shit, that's tomorrow?

Maxine's twins are having a birthday party,

and I gotta babysit the adults. - Mm.

- Yeah and I'm bummed I can't go either.

- Yeah, I know you got your little surgery or whatever.

[chuckles] - [chuckles]

- Why does everyone keep calling it a little surgery?

I swear to God.

Gary's cousin Pam is our new nanny,

and she's always making fun of me and my little surgeries.

- How's it going? - It's not going well.

- Oh, okay. - But I thought it'd be good.

I mean, Gary's getting a chance to write

and you're getting some peace.

Isn't that what you wanted? [phone chimes]

- I mean, I don't know if I'd put it like

that's what I wanted but--

- Ari just sent a text.

"Won't make it. Dealing with a David thing."

- Oh, that can't be good.

- Look, you need to have this for Ari.

- Oh. - Cause she need it.

- Well to me. I'm getting married!

- Yeah! - Yes, cheers to you!

You're getting married. Again.

[punchy music]

♪ ♪

- Hey, babe. You're up early.

- We need to talk. I sent you something.

Check your email.

- Uh, what am I looking at? - You tell me.

- Okay.

Uh, that's me. That's Vanessa.

That's an overpriced Caesar salad.

What's this about?

- I got tagged in that photo last night,

even though I'm not in it, but Vanessa is.

And so are you wearing the tie I bought you for your birthday.

The same one you wore the night you stood me up

a few weeks ago, and I know you, David,

you don't wear the same shit twice in a month.

- Wait, what am I on trial for exactly?

- You said you missed your flight,

but it looks like you're having a nice dinner to me.

- No, that was lunch, Ari.

I told you.

I got stuck because of that car accident, remember?

- Even if it was just lunch, I still don't like it.

One-on-one meals, inside jokes,

Vanessa coming back to your apartment.

- All right, where is this coming from?

You don't usually do the whole jealous wife thing

- Oh, this is not about jealousy, David.

This is about inappropriate behavior.

And if you can't see that, if this flatters your ego,

then I don't--I don't know what to tell you.

- Okay, babe, listen.

we're both a little overheated.

Can I call you back later?

- You know what, David, you're a grown-ass man.

You do you.

- ♪ Make your actions match your words ♪

♪ One day ♪

- Hey, Senator, you're doing good work.

- ♪ I need you to pick a side ♪

- Appreciate you.

- ♪ You better pick a side, yeah ♪

♪ Pick a side, you better pick a side, yeah ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ ♪

♪ One line, two sides, you choose ♪

- Pam, we are so glad to have you helping out

while we look for permanent nanny,

but I cannot eat another bite. - Come on.

I can't have my baby cousin writing on an empty stomach.

And especially not in that dreary shed you got out there.

- Wait dreary--listen,

that shed is nicer than most people's living rooms.

And did you know that Langston Hughes

also wrote in this shit?

Now, I'm not trying to compare myself

but both of our names, they have G's in them.

Oh, and A's. I'm just saying.

- Good morning. I know I look crazy.

- Not crazy, sloppy. Like you gave up.

- I think you look good. - Thanks, babe.

I did just spend 10 hours in the OR last night,

so I can look like Chewbacca if I want.

- Okay.

- And I have to make my surgery report

before my late night shift today,

and I can't seem to find it anywhere.

Pam, you were cleaning earlier.

- No, I was decluttering. There's a difference.

See I was trying to create more space for you to work.

- Oh, thank you.

That is so thoughtful, but I have a system,

and it feels like you disrupted it.

- Well, you know Bree, I was just trying to do

something nice for you. That's all.

Cause clearly you and Gary

have been living a little messy,

so obviously you need me. - Thank you.

- Obviously we need you. That's so true.

[laughs] Thank you so much.

[soft dramatic music]

♪ ♪

- Ooh.

I love the red sparkles for you.

- Oh, it's perfect.

Oh, Regina, don't you think it's perfect?

- It's perfect. It's just sparkly and red.

Red represents the root chakra.

You just don't wanna mess with that.

- So sound check will be three hours before doors open.

Hair and makeup will be in your dressing room.

Do you still want those fresh orchids in both?

Because silk ones would save us money

for the Diptyque all-natural candles

you also requested.

- Fresh.

And I hope you have someone

who knows their way around a curling iron.

I don't just let anybody up in my hair.

- We can tell. - Girl, you know I got you.

Just imagine soft, loose curls

framing her face.

It'll go perfect with the red dress.

- I told you it's too flashy.

- Flashy is what we need to impress F.A.I.

- If I had it my way,

I'd have you onstage in a potato sack.

- Great, so we can kiss the red dress goodbye.

- Hold on, sometimes you gotta spend money to make money.

Okay, trust me, Regina. We'll take that.

Keep this one for me. Brilliant.

[punchy music]

♪ ♪

- So stupid again. [chuckles]

- I see you're making yourself feel at home.

- Mm-hmm, mm.

- Girl, and this Riesling is everything.

- Did you get that from the back of the cupboard?

- Yep, good thing I found it before the kids did.

- That was a gift from my surgery team

because I performed this damn near impossible

neurosurgery on the brachial plexus.

- Oh, good, so it was free, so you don't mind.

You wanna get a glass? You want some?

- No, that's so generous of you.

Very tempting. I have patients later.

You know, do you think it's a little early

for wine o'clock? - Please.

This is a little midday treat

like they have on "Married to the Game."

And you should really have a glass

because you do not deal with stress well.

- Uh-huh. - [gasps]

What? Do not step to that ho.

You do not wanna do that.

- Okay. You know what?

Um, I need to do some work before I go into the hospital,

so do you mind just keeping it down?

- Okay. I'ma keep it down.

- Thank you. - I won't disturb you.

- [sighs] Okay.

Drinking my wine. My expensive wine.

- [gasps] Oh, no, you didn't.

No, you didn't.

You know she gonna stab you in the back.

Uh-uh. That ol' nasty thots

- Pam, I just need a little quiet.

- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry.

Oh, snap! - Oh, God.

- Oh! - What happened?

- Why is she taking him back? - You know what?

I don't know what's happening. I don't care what's happening.

I gotta go work anywhere but here is what I gotta do.

- Oh, my God. What did you say?

You made me miss what she said.

I can't--where--

how do you rewind on this? Where's the rewind?

♪ ♪

- Gary, Gary. - Yes, what?

- Gary, we need to talk about Pam.

- Oh, isn't she great?

Baby, thanks to her I have had, like, a super successful day,

so maybe--maybe instead of a nanny,

we just need a family member

that doesn't have a life of their own.

- No, no, absolutely not.

We said that Pam was a temporary solution.

- Of course, but in the current temporary,

I think it's going pretty well, yeah?

- For you. It's going well for you.

She's not drinking up your very expensive gifted wine

and yelling at the TV like it's supposed to answer her.

It's crazy.

- Do I even wanna know what that means?

- No, actually you shouldn't.

You're, um, working really hard.

Can I just read something though?

- No, no, no, no, no. Come on.

It's cause it's not a lot of space in here for both of us

and I'm just getting started, so...

- Baby. - What?

- I'm so proud of you. - Thank you.

- Just wanna see what you're working on.

I'm not gonna judge you. - All right, this one time.

Okay? - Okay, 'kay, 'kay, 'kay.

- Keep in mind, it's just a rough draft, okay?

- You know I like it rough. - No, you don't.

- That's true. I don't.

- I was in the zone, baby.

In the--just... [imitates keyboard clacking]

- Okay, well, it's good. - Thank you.

- It's also just four sentences.

- Four very well-written sentences.

- Yeah, no, they're good. - Yeah.

- But at this rate, it's gonna be like what?

27 years before you finish a book.

- Just give me this. - What?

I knew you wouldn't get it... - No, no, no.

- Because you don't understand the creative process.

I got work to do. Thank you.

Thanks for coming to visit me. I have work to do.

[upbeat music]

♪ ♪

- A bounce house and a trampoline.

This is such a liability. - Let the kids have fun.

- Someone's gonna get hurt. - So what?

They'll fall, and they'll bounce back up again.

That's the point.

- You know what? You're right.

Let 'em bounce.

- Thank you. Was that so hard?

I'm gonna go check on the cake. Baker's running late.

- Mm-hmm.

- Look at you.

Taking deep breaths, using your inside voice,

no name calling.

I love to see you finally doing the conflict resolutions

I suggested.

- Well I realised

the more we argue, the more I have to see him,

so maybe it's best if I just play it cool.

- Does that mean you're not calling him

a dusty nigga anymore?

- Not to his face.

Instead, I created a fake IG profile.

This way I can write nasty comments under his posts.

A little anonymous online cruelty.

- I'm glad to see you're keeping it classy.

- Well that dick doesn't deserve shit,

but I promised you that I would behave.

- Well, thank you.

- I'm gonna go check on the cake.

- Your girls are so cute. - Thank you.

♪ ♪

Brian, did you get ahold of the bakery?

- Yes, but I had someone else pick it up.

- Okay.

- I heard it was someone's birthday.

- Shit. - Hey.

- I know this dusty negro did not invite

his used mattress pad up into my house around my kids.

- Maxine, breathe. I will handle this.

- Okay. Hey, brother man.

She needs to get out of my house now

because this is not what we agreed to.

- No, this is not what you agreed to.

I'm not some child you can just order around.

I say she stays, so she stays.

- Oh, you say she stays. Okay, okay, all right.

You know what? This is gonna be fun.

[punchy music]

- Maxine, two words. Time and place.

- Right, the time is now

and the place is here for an ass whooping.

- You really wanna give an ass whooping

at your kid's birthday party?

You are better than this Maxine.

Remember what you promised me?

- Promises are for suckers.

You should've got that shit in writing.

Move out the way.

Hey, brother, this is just like you to pull some shit

like this behind my back.

How dare you bring your skank into my house?

- I have a right to a private life.

Crystal is a part of that.

- Can I please just have a drama-free birthday party

with my children?

You know, some quality time with them as their mother?

- Oh, please, I remember when I used to beg you

to make time for our kids.

Like the year you skipped their birthday

to attend a tech conference.

- That conference was how I launched my company,

the company that is keeping your child whore

with an unlimited supply of Capri Sun.

- For the record, I prefer SunnyD.

- That would be the part that you would object to.

And what are you wearing?

Who wears a half-crop crop top

to a children's birthday party, you slut?

- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. - Whoa, wait, wait, time out.

Time out. Time out.

We need to focus on what's important here,

which is the kids.

Is this really the memory

you want them to have of this day?

- Yeah, Maxine, think of the children.

For once, try to be a good mother.

[screams] - Oh!

- This is assault. Baby, call the police.

- No, no, no, no, no, no assault.

No calling the police. - Just perfect, Max.

Thank you.

This is exactly what I need to get full custody.

- Jacob, I need you to call me back now

because we have a situation.

[punchy music]

♪ ♪

- Oh. [chuckles]

It is perfect in here.

Oh, tonight is gonna be so special.

[sighs] Where's Regina?

- I don't know. Curtis went to go get her.

- Oh, I'm sure she's driving him crazy.

[chuckles] Curtis!

- Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Hm, uh...

- What's happening?

Where's Regina? - I don't know.

She was here, and now she's not.

She won't pick up her phone.

It's more than likely that she's a no show, Hazel.

♪ ♪

- Regina!

- Regina! - Regina?

- What the hell, Regina?

- [sighs] I don't feel so good.

Sore throat.

- I vouched for you to a lot of people

who are coming to hear you tonight.

Do you understand that?

- Listen, Haze...

I don't think I can do this.

What if they say no?

- I wouldn't have done all this if I didn't believe in you.

They're gonna hear one note, and they're gonna fall in love

with you all over again. I can see it.

- But what version of me? I'm not you, Hazel.

You can rock a red sequined dress.

- I know. - But I can't.

It's not me.

Lord knows I really want this opportunity

but I want it as myself.

I'm sorry, Hazel.

- Nah.

[soft dramatic music]

I'm sorry.

If anybody knows

what it's like to have people dictate

who you are as an artist, it's me.

- Yeah, I know you can relate.

♪ ♪

- Okay, so how about this?

The first song is the Walker Lamont recording...

And the second... is your choosing.

- [chuckles]

Are you sure? - No.

But I'm trying to compromise here, so--

- Thank you, Hazel.

- Also, it may not be tonight,

but you are wearing that red dress.

- I spent way too much money. - Girl, you are a mess.

- Hi, this is Ari. Please leave a message.

[voicemail beeps]

- Hey, it's me again.

It's starting to feel like you're dodging my calls.

So please call me back.

- Okay, blackened salmon with sautéed spinach.

Told them to hold the rice.

I know you're trying to watch your figure.

You know, seventh sexiest politician in the world.

- Is that real? In the world?

- Yep. - Well, who is number one?

- Barack, duh. - Ah.

- Followed by AOC and Trudeau. but, hey, you beat Ossoff.

- Well, thank God for that.

[both chuckle]

Man, all this press is so nuts.

- I know. And it's still coming.

Oh, "Essence" wants to do a girl dad piece.

They want to know if you had a writer in mind,

someone you know personally?

- Oh, you know, I'll--I'll think on it.

- All right. Sounds good.

We'll circle back on that later.

Oh, and one more thing.

They want you to speak at a men's retreat

called Brother to Brother.

They're covering all costs, an additional fee,

and you can bring a plus one.

Can I confirm your participation?

- Sure. Yeah, let's do it.

- Awesome, oh, I'm so excited. Everything's going so well.

- Yeah, so well.

[punchy music]

♪ ♪

[tender piano music]

♪ ♪

- ♪ Oh ♪

♪ Ooh ♪

♪ Hey, yeah ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Swept me off my feet ♪

♪ Only to drop me, babe ♪

♪ You just let me keep falling ♪

♪ It didn't stop me, baby ♪

♪ So blinded by love ♪

♪ I was tripping ♪

♪ Could never hit the mark ♪

♪ We kept missing ♪

♪ Took my breath away ♪

♪ and suffocate me ♪

♪ So I can't breathe ♪

♪ Don't make promises that you can't keep ♪

♪ Put back the pieces you broke ♪

♪ Give back the time that you stole ♪

♪ You said you'd never let go ♪

♪ Can't ever feel like you owe me ♪

♪ You know that you owe me ♪

♪ You know that you owe me ♪

♪ Took away the old me ♪

♪ You owe me, you owe me ♪

♪ My days, you owe me that ♪

♪ Lost nights, you owe me that ♪

♪ I know I'll never get 'em back ♪

♪ But some day, you'll pay what you owe ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Putting back the pieces myself ♪

♪ ♪

♪ You can leave, don't need nothing else ♪

♪ You're gonna pay ♪

♪ What you owe ♪

♪ You know that you owe me ♪

♪ You know that you owe me ♪

♪ Took away the old me ♪

♪ You owe me, you owe me ♪

♪ My days, you owe me that ♪

♪ Lost nights, you owe me that ♪

♪ I know I'll never get 'em back ♪

♪ But some day ♪

♪ You'll pay what you owe ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Someday you'll pay ♪

♪ What you owe ♪

[cheers and applause]

[cheers and applause continue]

[upbeat music]

- ♪ Thought of you ♪

♪ Used to bring my stomach butterflies ♪

- And then I said, "truth be told."

[laughter]

Thank you for suggesting this though.

- My pleasure.

- You know, Gary's at a school board meeting,

and this is so much better than going home

and seeing his cousin just drinking up all my good wine

without even asking me, and she yells

at the TV like it's supposed to answer her.

- Really? - Yes.

- It's not that bad. Is it?

- It's worse. Yes.

- Can I get the gentleman

and his lovely wife another round?

- Oh, I am not the lovely wife.

- Oh, the gentleman's divorced.

- My apologies.

The gentleman and his lovely ex-wife.

- [chuckles] - Okay.

I am not the lovely ex-wife.

- No, my ex-wife is in Malta spending my retirement savings.

- Ooh!

- No, we--we're fine on drinks.

- Wow, retirement savings, Malta.

I'm so sorry to hear that.

- Oh, it's fine. At least we didn't have kids.

I can't imagine bringing up children

in an unhappy marriage.

- Ouch. That hits home.

- Why do you say that?

- Well when Gary and I were separated last year,

it was just-- it was really rough on us,

and I didn't even realise how rough it would be

on the kids, you know?

And I just worry about their therapy bills

when they're older.

- Yeah. Real talk.

It happens. Listen.

I think all parents traumatise their kids on some level.

We're imperfect beings. It's hard not to.

- That weirdly made me feel better.

- No, it's--it's true. Not your kids.

Your kids are gonna be fine. You're a rock star mum.

- Aw, thank you so much.

- I mean it.

- [chuckles]

[soft pop music]

- We should get the cheque. - Yeah.

Oh, I got the cheque. It's on me.

- Are you sure? - Yeah, of course.

Get outta here, Dr. Washington.

- Okay. - Yes.

- Cool. - Cheers.

- Hey. Mmm.

- ♪ You're making noise with yourself ♪

♪ ♪

- Mmm.

Wow. You liked the wine.

- Better not start that rumour.

[laughter]

- ♪ You're taking my mind ♪

♪ And putting it down ♪

♪ When I can fight this feeling ♪

- You set us up.

- Wow.

Not even a hello first. Just jumping straight in.

- Well, hellos are for friends, associates,

not pretty boys like you.

- Nice.

You know, for the record, I explicitly told my client

that he was not allowed to bring Crystal.

Regardless, that doesn't excuse your client

for the birthday cake assault.

- It's cake, Jacob. The bitch is fine.

- [chuckles] Fair enough.

But even if there are no physical damages,

the emotional distress alone warrants pressing charges.

- That's a joke, right? I hope so.

'Cause if you even think about pressing charges,

then we're going after full custody of the kids,

which shouldn't be hard when Brian is parading

his barely legal mistress,

violating their parental agreement.

- Technically, Crystal did not attend the party.

She was merely dropping off the cake.

- Okay, you wanna have a real fucking meeting right now,

or you gonna keep talking this nonsense in my face?

- Can I get you guys anything? - Yes.

I'll have another bourbon

and whatever she's having, that's on me.

- I'll have the same thing.

Double it up 'cause that's the kind of day I'm having,

and he's paying for it.

- Is that right? - Mm-hmm, you said it.

- I did say it. - Okay.

Look, Jacob, negative press

equals lower stock value to this company,

and we both know what that means.

Am I right?

- You know, I truly admire how skilled you are

at speaking a language I actually understand.

How it all affects me. - Okay

Yeah, well, us lawyers gotta look out for each other, right?

- How can I look out for you like you looked out for me?

- [chuckles]

I, um, have some things in mind

but they're really bad, bad ideas.

- There's no such thing as a bad idea.

- ♪ Hey ♪

♪ ♪

♪ Can I get to know you, babe? ♪

♪ Show you things that seem strange ♪

♪ ♪

♪ But you're still 19 ♪

♪ Keep it on the down low ♪

♪ Keep, keep it on the down low ♪

- Ooh.

♪ ♪

- ♪ Keep it on the down low ♪

- ♪ Low, low, low, low ♪

- ♪ Keep it on the down low ♪

♪ Down low, keep it on the down low ♪

- ♪ Low, low, low, low, low ♪

[phone ringing]

- Oh, she answered. Where were you?

I left voicemails, text messages.

I thought we were checking in once we cooled off.

- Yeah, the thing is, David, I'm not cooled off

because you're lying about that night you stood me up.

- Are you serious? This again?

- David. - Come on.

I have a lot on my plate, Ari. What difference does it make?

- David, enough. Just tell me the truth.

- Okay.

Yeah, I was with Vanessa, but I promise nothing happened.

And--and the picture is from lunch.

Her shitty college boyfriend broke up with her,

so I took her out to cheer up.

Later that night, I was on my way home, and she called me,

and she was a mess at a bar way too drunk

saying some dark things about hurting herself,

so I turned around and brought her

back to her apartment.

- And after that?

- I left her with her roommates and went home.

Alone, Ari.

- Well, if that's all it was,

why didn't you tell me that the first time?

- I don't know. I didn't wanna embarrass her.

- Oh, but you wanna let me feel crazy?

- No, I kept thinking

it would go away, but you know what?

Now that it's out in the open, maybe we can move past it.

- Move past it? You already lied once.

How can I believe that's the whole story?

- Because it is. I swear it was one bad night.

- Oh, and this is another.

[phone beeps]

[punchy music]

♪ ♪

[upbeat pop music]

- ♪ Keep me satisfied ♪

- Hey, Warren.

- Hey. - What did I tell you?

[chuckles]

Is Regina not everything I promised?

- Great energy,

but we already have a singer in her age group.

- [chuckles]

- You.

- Oh, okay. So now you have two.

You know we're not all the same, right?

- Hazel, I don't think you get it.

- I do get it.

You're going to pit two Black women

against each other.

Meanwhile, there are 50 white artists

named Chris

regurgitating music that I made over 20 years ago.

- Hazel, it's a no. It's a hard no.

Maybe reconsider Zuukie. - What?

- I'll be in touch.

- [chuckles]

- So did F.A.I like the show?

- No.

- Oh. [sighs]

- They loved it. [chuckles nervously]

- Oh, really? - Yeah.

[laughter]

- ♪ Won't you satisfy me? ♪

♪ Yeah ♪

♪ Satisfy ♪

- ♪ Hell yeah ♪ - ♪ Number one, yeah ♪

♪ I'm still number one ♪ - ♪ Hell yeah ♪

- ♪ Number one, always be number one ♪

- ♪ Oh ♪

♪ Took you for mine of the major ♪

- ♪ Oh ♪

- ♪ You won't admit it ♪

♪ You're the fruits of my labor ♪

- ♪ Hell yeah ♪ - ♪ Number one, yeah ♪

♪ I'm still number one ♪ - ♪ Hell yeah ♪

- ♪ Number one, always be number one ♪

- ♪ Oh ♪

♪ Don't forget it, yeah, I'm still number one ♪

- ♪ Hell yeah ♪

- [snaps] - Whoo!

[animal bleats]