All language subtitles for MSW S12E17 - Something Foul in Flappieville

FEMALE NARRATOR: Tonight on Murder, She Wrote.

Inspector Le Chat.

A million kids don't watch Saturday morning television

'cause your little Flappie doesn't look like Cindy Crawford.

Hey, Pound Dog is as funny as he ever was.

I hope to choke on a bone if I ain't.

We're not renewing the show for next season.

Not until I see the white of your contract.

What choice do you have?

If I were a volcano, I'd be spewing lava!

I'm Happy Bunny. Yes, you are.

Curiosity killed the cat.

So the puppet is the killer.

You said it, I didn't.

I have a feeling my husband suspects something already.

You got this wrong. MARY: Robbie, no!

(LAUGHING)

Gosh, you're incredible! Oh, thanks.

Thank you.

Yeah.

I hope your bribing works.

DARREN: Introducing Inspector Le Chat and Reginald Raccoon!

(IN FRENCH ACCENT) My goodness, they must be here someplace.

This is definitely a mystery.

(EXCLAIMS) Clumsy, watch where you are going.

I don't have eyes back there. Why don't you watch where you're going?

Aha! I see a clue.

A clue? A clue.

I will prove you stole Mademoiselle Happy Bunny's jewel

in the dining car of the Flappieville railroad train.

Listen, bozo, I haven't eaten in a week.

I was loose as a goose asleep in the caboose.

(SNORING)

Just a moment, Monsieur Raccoon.

How do you explain that ketchup on your hand?

I have it! I have it! Voil�!

Le Chat, inspector extraordinaire,

I have caught you, how you say, red-handed.

Curses! Foiled again!

Wonderful!

Thank you! Thank you very much!

What'd you think? Pretty fun, huh?

ALL: Yeah!

(CHILDREN CHATTERING)

Love the raccoon! Yeah!

Is that really ketchup on the raccoon?

That was really good, except the Inspector sounds like Pound Dog.

GIRL: Yeah!

ALL: Yeah. No.

Oh! You guys really know how to hurt a guy.

(LAUGHS) Oh, bravo. That was very funny.

Oh, thank you so much, Mrs. Fletcher.

They're just charming.

Stevie.

Hi, Mrs. Dorow.

Stevie, hi. How are you? Good.

Guys. I'm sorry I'm late. The traffic was impossible.

Darren, did I miss the entire thing?

DARREN: Yeah. Well, I'll forgive you, even though your husband won't.

Oh, he forgives me.

See you later, Stevie. Bye.

"Bye, Stevie." You know him?

Everybody's a critic. ROBBIE: The kid has a point.

How was lunch with the girls at La Gorgonzola?

It was great.

Uh, Jessica.

Arvin, you and I have the only two keys for this, okay?

It's locked every night.

If I'm not here, it's your responsibility.

You got it, Mr. Crosley. All right.

Can't be too cautious where toy companies are concerned.

They're not above ripping off a new idea even before it's off the drawing board.

So, I'm so glad you all love my new character.

Darren, the character came from a story Jessica created

for her grandnieces and nephews.

Give me a break, Robbie, will you?

I was simply saying that it is a privilege to bring her creation to life.

And a worthy addition to Flappieville he is.

Jessica, I noticed you making some notes.

Uh, yes. There were a couple of things, actually.

The Inspector's demeanor and his costume.

You see, I always pictured him more elegant.

Debonair perhaps, you know?

Excellent. I'll put you together with Helena McKenna.

Oh, good.

And Jason. Don't forget Jason.

And Jason Cardino.

He's one of the bright, new young helpers here at Flappieville.

Now I figure on a rollout schedule of six to eight months

for the new Inspector Le Chat Show.

It's the best Flappie we ever made.

Excuse me! Are we maybe forgetting about good old Pound Dog?

(SCOFFS) Darren, it's time to hang Pound Dog up.

Let him retire to the Smithsonian, along with Charlie McCarthy and...

Pound Dog is as funny as he ever was.

Couldn't put it any better myself.

Darren, about the Inspector's voice...

I hated it, too.

Listen, pal, you just stick to building the toys, okay?

Putting on the show is my domain.

Hey, we have to invest a fortune to launch Le Chat Toys.

That entitles us to a say... Guys, guys. Come on.

We've always done our best work in collaboration.

That was a long time ago.

Darren, it seems to me that the Inspector's voice

is a little too much like Pound Dog's.

What? No, he sounds nothing like him.

I mean, (IMITATING POUND DOG) Pound Dog is a good old boy

from Elvis Presley country down Memphis way.

(IMITATING LE CHAT) Now, Inspector Le Chat is a Frenchman

with an eye for the femme fatale.

I'm losing it here, you know, and I am late, okay?

I hope you're happy, Robbie. I'm coming unglued because of you.

Jessica, I think the Inspector Le Chat has the potential to become a classic.

You know, you saw all that in my story.

I really only thought of it as a way to amuse a few children.

The Inspector's a winner.

Wish I felt the same enthusiasm for the puppeteer.

Darling, isn't it time you make your peace with Darren?

That would take major surgery, darling.

Got a meeting with my department heads.

If we're gonna get Le Chat online six months from now,

we've got to start the wheels turning.

This project, it seems to be touching some sore spots.

Yeah, I'd hoped that it would heal them.

Darren and I were an item a long time ago.

Before you and I met, Jessica.

They were best friends and when Robbie and I fell in love,

well, that sort of put an end to the friendship between the guys.

Oh, Jessica.

We used to have such fun together.

I was hoping that this project might help us get back to the way it was.

You know, Robbie and I haven't been able to have a child.

And now there's this extra stress.

But I... I can't help feeling that there's something else on Robbie's mind,

something that he's not saying.

KIM: It's ugly! Like nothing goes with anything else.

I mean, have you ever seen a frumpier costume in your life?

Shh! Helena can hear you.

I don't care.

No wonder the Pound Dog ratings have dropped to a new low.

All right. Why didn't I think of that?

A million kids don't watch Saturday morning television

'cause your little Flappie doesn't look like Cindy Crawford.

Jason, I'm having trouble with the controls on this one.

It keeps me from doing any of my subtle movements.

(SCOFFS)

No problem.

Hmm.

Kim, I was just wondering

if maybe we could, I don't know, have dinner

or see a movie or something tonight.

Oh, I'd love to. But I'm kind of busy.

See you.

Bye, Kim.

Watch out for that one.

The only person she thinks about is herself.

Thanks for the warning, but right now I prefer to trust my hormones.

That's really a bad idea.

But who am I to give advice on such matters?

Gus.

I hear that everybody really loved the little Inspector.

Oh, yeah.

And Kim was saying that Darren said pretty nice stuff about me.

Yeah. Yeah.

And Jason, Darren was wondering if you've signed your contract yet.

No, not yet.

Is there a problem with it? Why? Should there be?

No! No, I'll take a look at it for you.

Not that I'm that good at legalese.

I'll take care of it, Gus.

Hey, put that down.

Hey, Jason.

I didn't mean any harm. I was just checking out the new fellow.

Arvin, you're not supposed to touch any of the Flappies, especially not the Inspector.

Okay, okay, I've got it. No offense intended.

You okay, Inspector?

(SPEAKING FRENCH) All is well.

Or it will be soon.

And now, by popular request, here's Happy Bunny with a poem.

(LAUGHS)

I think that I shall always hop whenever I spy a carrot-top.

Oh, well, that's my all-time favorite.

(LAUGHS)

Look, Darren, I don't know how to say this, but...

No, no, no. I know, I know. It's silly stuff, you know.

But, hey, it's supposed to be silly, right?

I mean, and the kids still love it after 14 years.

Well, not enough of them anymore,

according to the ratings.

Look, Darren, there's no way to say this except to say it.

It's time to pension off Pound Dog.

We're not renewing the show for next season.

Aw, no.

I thought I owed you the courtesy of hearing it from the source.

No, man. No!

Okay. Okay. You know what? You are absolutely right.

Now, what we need to do

(STAMMERING) Is to find some way to put new life into the old pooch.

Well, see, there's the problem, see? It's old and... And tired.

You know, I cannot believe how in sync we are on this.

No! Really. Really. You know, I was gonna lay this on you next week,

but, um, well,

I have created a great new character.

Inspector Le Chat.

See, he's this French cop, right? And his new beat is Flappieville.

Well, that's a little different.

Yes, yes, it is different.

It is different and it is big-time funny.

Now, I was gonna surprise you and, you know, fold the Inspector

into the Pound Dog series, you know.

I get the kids yelling for more and then boom!

Spin him off into his own show.

So the network won't have to spend the money on a new pilot.

Exactly my thinking.

And, just in case I don't have your attention here,

the character is based on a book by Jessica Fletcher.

Yeah, the famous mystery writer.

She just happens to be in town doing an educational special.

Really?

I like her stuff. A lot.

So, CDs, books, games, toys, clothing, software.

Big promotional possibilities here, right?

All plugging the show.

And theoretically you could be on the air this season?

Hey, you tell me the light is green and Le Chat debuts six weeks from today.

I'll need to see something and fast.

Absolutely. You will have final sketches and a storyboard.

(SIGHS) Okay. Good.

And for God sakes, please, find someone else to do the voice, huh?

All the characters on Pound Dog sound like you.

Get someone good. Get Nattie Holt.

Sure, yeah. Someone like Nattie'd be great.

Not someone like. Get Nattie.

Anything else?

Look, Darren, I'm not gonna lie to you.

You're still more dead than alive.

(SIGHS)

JASON: So, what do you think?

Oh, I like it much better.

You were right. The wardrobe changes really go with his sophisticated,

Parisian personality. Yes.

Helena, I really love this new costume design.

It's terrific. It's almost exactly the way I imagined the Inspector.

You know, you're both not only very good, you're very quick.

JASON: Thank you. Thank you.

Well, I'd better get back to work before all this praise goes to my head.

See you.

I should have the costume ready by tonight.

Thanks for dropping by, Jessica.

Oh, I'm so glad I did.

I really love this feeling of participating.

It's something that I often miss when I'm home working alone.

Well, hold on to that participatory feeling,

because I'm gonna run and get the fabric I'm gonna use.

Can you stay a sec? Oh, sure.

Can I help you?

Oh, well... Mrs. Fletcher.

I'm Arvin Bucknell, Security. I didn't mean to disturb you.

Oh, that's quite all right. Helena will be right back.

We were just looking at some costume sketches.

Oh, that's okay. I won't bother you.

Not at all.

Hi, baby.

I'm trying to work here, Kim, okay?

Sorry.

It's just that I think I should have something to say about the look of

my puppet's costume and Helena...

Look, okay, okay, okay. I will talk to Helena, okay?

Okay. Okay.

Is this gonna take long?

I can come back. No. No.

We've gotta talk, all right? Excuse me for one sec.

DARREN: Do you think Kim's got some kind of hidden agenda?

I mean, she always just sort of seems to be around.

Maybe it's your magnetic charm.

Yeah.

Look, you know if Nattie's in town?

Why would I know that?

It's been five years since she divorced me.

Yeah. And you've been trying to get her back the whole time.

Look, I talked to her agent and she said she's booked.

Oh, I don't think she'll ever work for us again.

Yeah, well, you better see to it that she does.

I need her for the voice of Le Chat.

Wait a minute. A new voice for the Inspector? Now?

Darren, what is going on?

Look, don't worry about it, okay?

Just get her for the home team.

What about Jason? He sign his contract yet?

No. No. Evidently, he's got some problems with it.

Maybe the kid's smarter than I was.

(SCOFFS) Did I ever say I was perfect?

I'm in a pressure cooker here. We all are.

Pound Dog's gonna die unless I can deliver Nattie to the network by tomorrow.

Wait... Wait a minute.

Wait, what's Nattie got to do with Pound Dog?

Well, to keep the old pooch alive, I had to give them Inspector Le Chat.

He's gonna be Pound Dog's new co-star.

Darren. Darren!

I know. I know, okay? Just get her for me.

Please? I'll do what I can.

Thank you.

You wanted to see me, Mr. Crosley?

Yeah. Yeah. Arvin, come here, would you?

Listen, I've got a special assignment for you.

What's that, sir? Well, um...

I need you to keep a close eye on somebody for me.

Who do you have in mind?

Order in the court! Order in the court! All rise for Judge Le Chat.

POUND DOG: Darned if it ain't the old Inspector himself.

Hear ye. Hear ye.

The case of Flappieville versus Darren Crosley.

Pound Dog, take the stand.

Your Honor, what we've got here is history repeating itself all over again.

Darren's gonna hog all the money and take all the credit

like when he stole me from my creator, Gus Hayward.

And now he's gonna do it to your creator, Jason Cardino.

Are you certain of your facts, monsieur le dog?

I hope to choke on a bone if I ain't.

The court has reached a decision.

I find Darren Crosley guilty as charged

and sentence him to 100 years in the electric chair.

Make that 200 years.

DARREN: And now, here he is in person,

the new and improved, streamlined crime-fighter

from Paris, France, Inspector Le Chat.

He's absolutely perfect.

You know, the changes really work, Jason.

Thanks, Mrs. Fletcher.

Jason, do me a favor, would you?

Have Kim run these over to Parker Foreman at the network.

Thanks. Ah!

Still one small change.

Voil�! Good. I like it.

You know, I am so knocked out by what that kid has done for our little Inspector,

I am gonna bump his share of the merchandising from
2% to 5%.

Well, I think that's very appropriate, Darren,

because I saw some of the early conceptual sketches of his

and they are outstanding.

Oh, yeah! And, Jessica, as sort of an expression of my gratitude

for your immense contributions,

and as kind of a bonus inducement for signing your contract right away,

I'm upping your percentage from
20 to 30.

Oh, well, that's very generous of you, Darren.

Is there any particular reason why I should need inducement?

Well, I suppose I ought to tell you about this little conversation

I had with the network.

It kind of affects our scheduling plans.

You know, with regard to when Inspector Le Chat actually having his own show.

Um...

(KNOCK ON DOOR)

Hello.

Who might you be?

I'm Happy Bunny. Yes, you are.

On The Pound Dog Show. I work the puppet and do the voice.

Oh! My name's Kim Swofford.

Kim. Parker Foreman.

Hi. Hi.

You know, you're one of the few bright spots on the show.

Oh, thanks. Mmm.

I try to keep her sexy.

You know what they say about rabbits.

Uh-huh.

Oh, please, have a seat.

Did I hear a rumor that you have something going with Darren Crosley?

Oh, no. Nothing serious. Oh.

But he's a fabulous talent, isn't he? (EXCLAIMS)

That's why I'm here.

With the new Inspector Le Chat drawings.

Oh, please, show me more, Miss Bunny.

Kim.

TERRY: How about tomorrow?

Oh, no. No, I don't think I could possibly get away.

I have a feeling my husband suspects something already.

Well, Mary, you're gonna have to make a commitment.

I know.

I could speak to him if you'd like.

No. No, please.

I'll deal with it.

Soon, I promise.

You have been so understanding.

Please just bear with me a little longer.

Of course.

Thank you.

Robbie Dorow! Congratulations!

I just saw the revised sketches of Inspector Le Chat.

Looks to me like you and Darren are riding a winner, huh?

Well, I guess we'll know by next fall.

(LAUGHING) Next fall.

Don't they tell you anything? We're talking next month.

(PAGER BEEPING) Oops!

They're after me again.

Huh! Ciao.

NATTIE: That was a fun story, Daddy.

Did you like it?

(SNORING)

Your story put Daddy to sleep, Leroy.

Ha! That's nice.

Tomorrow night we'll tell him about The Cat in the Hat.

Children, aren't you in bed yet?

Yes, Mother!

(GRUNTING)

Move over, Daddy.

(SNORING)

That was right on the money, Nattie.

Do you wanna hear the playback?

(YAWNING) I'm happy if you are.

You haven't changed.

Still the woman of 1,017 voices.

And I can say no in all of them.

You can tell that to Darren Crosley.

You can name your price.

The network says it's gotta be you or forget the new show.

Parker Foreman is a fan of yours.

What do you get out of it, a pat on the head?

Oh, so I'm not aggressive.

Maybe that's why you grew up to play with dolls.

Nattie.

I tried like hell to be the man you wanted.

But I'm just me.

Oh, Gus.

(SIGHS)

(IN FRENCH ACCENT) So, you think that I will be the good Inspector Le Chat? Huh?

(AGREEING IN FRENCH)

Okay, did you make the deal with Nattie Holt?

Yeah. Good.

Here's my deal.

I'll keep you on the air for the rest of this season, plus a pick-up for next year

as the new Inspector Le Chat/Pound Dog Show.

Oh, that is great, Parker. You are gonna love the...

(SHUSHING) I talk, you listen.

I get half the merchandising royalties.

Wait. The network wants half?

No. Look, not the network. Listen.

Me, personally. 50%.

Games, toys, videos, everything.

I'll give you the number of a bank account in the Caymans.

And, of course, this will just be our little secret.

Half? I mean, there are other people involved.

Robbie and...

Hello! We're not negotiating here.

Take it or leave it.

Yeah. Yeah, okay, fine. You got a deal.

Really? Oh, one more thing, for the non-record,

this meeting never took place, hmm? See you.

For the non-record, this meeting never took place.

MARY: Oh, dear. Making the Inspector part of The Pound Dog Show

and putting it on the air so soon...

I don't think Robbie's gonna be very happy with any of this.

Well, I'm afraid Darren has seen to it

that we don't have much of a choice.

Well, I should have expected something like this.

Darren always means well, but somehow, invariably,

he manages to shoot himself in the foot.

Along with a lot of other people.

I'm amazed I have any toes left at all.

Lord knows what other commitments he's made.

Jessica, Darren wanted to get your notes on the revised Pound Dog/Le Chat script

before we messenger it over to the network.

We're really under the gun here.

Of course. I'll read it right away.

I'll call you as soon as I'm finished.

Okay. Thank you. Oh, and Gus.

I wonder if you could check on something for me.

Sure.

(YELLING) Upset? Do I sound upset?

If I were a volcano, I'd be spewing lava!

(STUTTERS) Look, you wanted Inspector Le Chat on the air. I made it happen.

Plus I got you an extra 10 points on the merchandising to boot.

That may satisfy Jessica,

but my understanding was a show of his own,

timed to start just before the Inspector Le Chat toys and games hit the stores.

Darren, the Inspector could have been the biggest thing in television.

Instead, you turned him into a straight man for a worn-out fleabag!

Hey, hey, just watch it, okay?

Look, so Le Chat'll spin off into his own show a year or so down the line.

I mean, is that so bad?

You sold something you don't own.

Under terms you didn't have any right to approve without consulting with me,

considering I own the merchandising rights!

Oh, man, you had me going there, Robbie.

Yeah. Lunch is on me tomorrow.

Okay. Bye-bye.

That Robbie's quite a kidder, huh?

You wanna take these upstairs for me?

Yes, sir. Thanks.

He hung up on you, didn't he?

You know, Nattie, when you first walked into my office,

I thought to myself, "Now, there is just the woman I wanted to see."

What a coincidence! Because I was thinking,

"Here's the guy I said I never wanted to see again as long as I lived."

Hmm.

That's funny. But you're still committed to the project, right?

Not on paper.

I was thinking that we could settle the terms right here and now.

30% of the merchandising royalties could go to Gus and Jason

and then another 10% for me.

Or I'm out of here.

But Nattie...

And you know what? If it could come out of your share,

that would make the deal that much sweeter.

Wow. You really know how to kick a guy where it hurts.

Yeah. Well, get ready.

I want Gus to executive produce,

run of the show, all episodes, no cut-off.

Ouch! Okay. Fine.

All right, now that the pleasantries are out of the way,

when can you meet with our staff?

Not until I see the white of your contract.

You know, Mary and I've got an anniversary coming up next week.

Yes. Mary mentioned it.

Seven years, isn't it? Uh-huh.

The seven year itch.

People usually think that's a guy thing, but...

She's having an affair, Jessica.

Are you sure, Robbie? I've seen them together.

Oh, I'm sorry.

I don't know...

It all began to change when we lost the baby and the doctors said

she couldn't have any more children six years ago.

I guess neither of us ever really got over it.

I've been kind of distant, buried in my work.

Jessica, I... I don't...

I don't wanna lose her.

Look, all I'm saying is, just, you know, try and take it a little easy on Kim, okay?

Oh, that pain in the cottontail prima donna.

She's demanded so many changes in Happy Bunny's costume,

you'd think she was wearing it herself.

Yeah. Well, I heard her side of the story.

Oh, don't tell me. I already know the plot

and who plays Wicked Witch of the West.

Okay, fine. All right. Hey, do you know where Jason is?

Yeah. He had an appointment.

With his lawyer. To go over his contract.

Oh, terrific. That is just terrific.

Arvin?

Just making my rounds, sir.

Darren, is there anything I can do to help?

No. I wish there was.

Look, Gus, I appreciate

your gathering this information for me so fast,

but I think I'm writing it down incorrectly.

All right. Let's go over it again.

These are the slices of the merchandising pie for Inspector Le Chat.

Nattie gets 20%. Plus my 30%.

GUS: You know, she brokered 33% for me and Jason.

JESSICA: Plus 30% for Robbie.

GUS: Yeah. And that adds up to...

113%.

You're kidding. Uh-uh.

That's not even counting Darren's usual 40%.

(SIGHS)

Whatever made me think this was gonna be fun?

(DOOR OPENING)

JESSICA: Darren?

Oh, Jessica.

Thank God you're here. I... I found him like this.

It's Arvin, the security guard.

He must have surprised a thief trying to steal Inspector Le Chat.

(SIRENS WAILING)

(PEOPLE CHATTERING)

Marty, make sure you get some pictures from the other side

so we can get that perspective as well, okay?

Mr. Crosley. Can I show you something?

Man, it looks like it was jimmied open with a meat cleaver.

Actually, it was a pair of scissors.

Yeah, our perpetrator wasn't somebody who was looking for a paper clip.

Lieutenant, it looks to me like the work of an amateur.

Ah. You're the mystery maven.

Well, I'm just a bewildered cop.

Who has keys to this locker, Mr. Crosley?

Only Arvin and I.

Arvin. What was so valuable in there?

Him. He's gonna be the new sensation with the kids.

And some highly classified drawings.

Well, he's still here, so are the drawings.

You sure there wasn't something else? Whoa! Whoa!

Looks like we have the murder weapon.

Lieutenant Spevak, something over here you might like to take a look at.

Yeah, it looks like blood, all right.

What do you know? So the puppet is the killer.

Better not tell my kid.

113%? I really gave that much away?

Mmm-hmm. I mean, what do you plan to do if Inspector Le Chat

is a huge success?

I don't know. Go directly to jail, I guess.

Jessica, I just wasn't thinking, you know?

I wanted so badly for it all to happen, to work out for everybody,

and now, Inspector Le Chat, Pound Dog...

I've really blown it, haven't I?

Maybe not.

What do you mean?

I mean, I might be willing to take a smaller share.

And maybe if you talk to the others...

That's it! I'll just be... I'll just be up front about it and...

Oh, boy! There's Nattie.

She hates me and...

And Gus. I don't know, Jessica.

Darren, what choice do you have?

So you're saying I gotta start acting like a grownup, huh?

You said it, I didn't.

Now, you're sure that this is all of it?

Oh. Yeah, absolutely.

And thanks, Jessica.

I'm just gonna throw myself at their mercy and hope for the best.

FOREMAN: Hey, gang, sorry I'm so buried in work over here

that I can't make it over there for your focus group session,

but on behalf of the network, I want to wish us all the best of luck

on your latest public unveiling of Inspector Le Chat.

Hey, the focus group is only a half a dozen kids, Parker.

Hopefully the first of millions, Darren.

Oh, by the way,

I want to tell you all how shocked I was about last night's unfortunate happening.

It was very unsettling, Mr. Foreman.

But things are beginning to level out over here.

Thanks to some very forgiving people.

May I ask you, are you satisfied

with the recent modifications to the Inspector?

Oh, absolutely, and I was just coming to that.

I've been running the sketches past everyone over here.

They're just crazy about that little fellow.

The new changes are just great.

Trench coat,

moving his magnifying glass to his left hand.

Love the bowtie.

Now he just seems to have

the right amount of sophistication, don't you think?

Listen, give me a call when you have some results from the focus group session.

(BIDDING FAREWELL IN SPANISH)

Bye.

Parker, you just got a special delivery in.

From who? I don't know.

There's no return address on it.

Hmm.

Thank you. Okay.

POUND DOG: Howdy! Give a listen to this.

FOREMAN: I get half the merchandising royalties.

Not the network. Me personally. 50% .

Games, toys, videos, everything.

I'll give you the number of a bank account in the Caymans.

And, of course, this will be our little secret.

Another thing, for the non-record,

this little meeting never took place.

POUND DOG: Well, you'll be hearing from me, partner!

In the meantime, why don't you start breaking open your piggy bank?

(LAUGHS)

(HOWLS)

Very funny, Darren.

You snake.

You filthy reptile! Stop!

You, sir, are under arrest.

Arrest? Arrest.

(TRAIN WHISTLING)

And thank heavens, the Flappieville Express.

She is right on time.

Yup, Inspector Le Chat, thanks to your deductive powers.

Detective Powers? Who is he?

I was told that I am the only gendarme in Flappieville.

(CHUCKLING)

And this is The Pound Dog/ Inspector Le Chat Show,

barking off till next time.

Terrific, I have to admit it.

Did you see the children's faces?

And Nattie's voice, it's perfect.

Darling, this is Stevie.

He wants to tell you what he thinks of Inspector Le Chat.

He was really funny. A lot more funny than dumb old Pound Dog.

You said it, kid.

I've got to talk to Darren.

If he'll swear to firm up design today, no more changes. Darren.

Bye, Stevie. Bye. See you.

Caitlin, let's go.

Mr. Crosley, can I talk to you for a second?

Well, you know, Lieutenant,

you have picked a singularly inconvenient time.

Yeah, well, it'll have to do.

You know, it turns out that the flatiron was the murder weapon.

Uh-huh.

Well, the thing of it is though, that the...

The fingerprints on the handle were all smudged.

Except for one set.

They were nice and clean.

Yours.

Yeah. Well, I can... I can explain that.

You see, when I came into the design room and found Arvin's body,

well, I picked up the flatiron. Probably a dumb thing to do.

Well, that's a very natural reaction, Lieutenant.

Probably not as dumb as you're gonna think I am now.

I'm placing you under arrest for murder.

What? Why would I kill Arvin?

I mean, he was a perfectly nice guy.

Murder victims frequently are.

Several of your employees have stated

that you had words with him on several occasions.

Jessica, this is totally nuts. I mean, I didn't kill anybody!

OFFICER: Come on, buddy. Let's go.

Hi, Mr. Foreman. Remember me?

Oh, yeah. Of course. Kim, the Happy Bunny.

Look, any other time I'd be tickled to see you,

but I'm expecting someone. Kind of a touchy business thing, so...

Don't mind. I know.

You know what?

I sent you the excerpts from the tape.

Please.

Pound Dog's voice was on it,

so I figured that it was Darren or maybe Gus.

Mmm-mmm. I spliced together bits of Pound Dog's voice from some old shows.

So, I assume you and Darren are in this together.

Uh-uh. It is blackmail.

DARREN: I'm kind of scared here.

HELENA: Well, it's about time.

I mean, you know me, I can usually talk my way out of any tight spot,

but this cop Spevak, he's a pretty hard sell.

Darren, Lieutenant Spevak theorized

that Arvin Bucknell stumbled over evidence of a less than ethical deal that you'd made.

Yeah. I never should've told him about the goof-up with percentages.

Yeah, well, somebody would have.

I just don't get this whole business with

the iron and the bloodstains on the Inspector Le Chat Flappie.

Well, I think I can understand that one.

I mean, suppose the killer's hand was inside a Flappie.

(GASPS) Yes! And that was the hand he used to hold the flatiron.

Which would account for why the fingerprints were smudged on the handle.

But what I don't understand is who jimmied the locker and why.

I mean, Inspector Le Chat and all the other drawings were left behind after all.

What was Arvin doing in the design room?

Well, maybe he caught the killer

in the act of trying to break into the locker.

But how did the killer get in?

Well, maybe they forced Arvin to let them in.

DARREN: Jessica?

It just doesn't want to add up.

Are you sure there wasn't something else of great value in that locker?

Here you go.

Hey, I wanna talk to you.

I've seen you and my wife together and it's gonna stop, now.

Mr. Dorow, you got this wrong.

Robbie, no! Please, don't.

Oh, great. You're here to see him, right?

No, I... This is Terry Fusco.

I'm not here to see him, I'm here to see Stevie.

Stevie. Who's Stevie?

Robbie, I was hoping that he would be our son.

Mr. Dorow, your wife and I have been working together.

I'm a social worker specializing in adoptions.

Stevie's a foster child...

Mary, for God sake, I thought...

Darling, I know how touchy you've been about children.

I wanted to bring you around to the idea gradually.

I thought you were the one who never wanted to talk about it.

This Stevie... How long has this been in the works?

Well, we're still in the initial stages, Mr. Dorow.

Frankly, my biggest concern was,

well, whether or not you'd welcome the boy.

You met him. At the focus groups.

That's Stevie? The one who thought Pound Dog was dumb?

Yes. Yes.

That's my kind of kid.

Good news? Could be. Mmm-hmm.

Oh, you know, I almost forgot.

Before, there was another call for you.

Oh! No name. Nah. It's just the guy at the network.

Fiji calling.

What?

The travel brochure on Kim's clipboard.

Okay. You see, you're losing me, Mrs. Fletcher.

What does that mean?

I'm not quite sure.

But I am almost certain that Darren is still holding something back.

Something that'll make everything a lot clearer.

You know something? Curiosity killed the cat.

Ah, mademoiselle. Welcome to Flappie's late show.

Well, what is this, some kind of joke?

Oh! No, no, ch�rie.

Would you like to tell the Inspector

what you know about Darren Crosley's tape cassette

before you leave on your little vacation to the south seas?

How do you know about my travel plans?

Kim, Darren finally told me about the audio cassette.

The one you stole from the locker in the design room.

That was the motive for the murder of Arvin Bucknell.

Murder?

Mrs. Fletcher, you are way crazy

if you think I had anything to do with that.

Oh, but you had a great deal to do with it.

After the murder, I noticed a travel brochure on your clipboard

with a phone number written on it.

Lieutenant Spevak called the travel agency

and they said that you'd booked a very expensive deluxe tour,

but hadn't paid for it yet.

You told the travel agent that you expected to have the money very soon.

Well, I've been saving up.

Not according to your bank balance.

The phone number you jotted on the brochure was Parker Foreman's.

You intended to blackmail him with the tape cassette.

I don't know what you're talking about.

Yeah. You were always skulking around my office,

looking for stuff.

Actually, I thought it was kind of cute.

Sort of reminded me of myself.

Ambitious and pushy.

So what toy company did you make the deal with?

Does it matter?

I made a copy of the key with that in mind.

But when I found the tape and played it,

I realized that I had something that was worth much more.

But you've got to believe me, I didn't kill Arvin.

Ah, evening, all.

I do believe you, Kim.

You took that tape,

but then someone else came looking for it.

Mr. Foreman, I believe that was you.

I'm sorry, you're losing me, Mrs. Fletcher.

Kim phoned and invited me to a run-through.

Well, I'm afraid that that was Nattie, the woman of 1,017
voices, imitating Kim.

Really? At your suggestion, I gather.

You were the person threatened by the existence of that tape

and you assumed that Darren was going to blackmail you with it,

so you killed in order to get it.

I was just gonna use it to try and keep you honest.

JESSICA: But you discovered that the tape was already gone.

What you didn't learn till later was that Kim had taken it.

It's fascinating. Sounds like a plot for one of your mysteries, Mrs. Fletcher,

but there's just... Just one major hole.

You see that there's no way you can prove any of this.

Ah, but there is.

Mr. Foreman, you told us you'd been at the murder scene.

No, no, no. Forget it.

I haven't been in this building in months.

Not true.

When you spoke to us from your office, the morning after the murder,

you commented on the change that we'd made on Inspector Le Chat.

Moving his magnifying glass to his left hand...

JESSICA: Now that particular change

was made after the sketches were sent to you.

The only way you could have known that the magnifying glass

was in the Inspector's left hand was if you were here that night.

And if we need any more, I guarantee our lab boys will be able to

find traces of your skin inside that dummy.

Huh.

You know, when I left you on the street that day, I just

happened to look back and I saw you take the tape recorder from your pocket.

I had to get my hands on that cassette.

I tried to bribe the security guard to show me

where Darren kept his valuables,

but, oh, no. He was way ahead of me.

You see, he had played the tape for himself

and he was gonna put the squeeze on me,

so yes, I did put my hand inside that ridiculous puppet

and I slugged him with a flatiron.

I got rid of one blackmailer.

Unfortunately, not the other.

Jessica, by the time you're back in New York, we'll be in Hawaii.

Where our son is going to teach Robbie how to fish and relax.

Don't worry. It's easy.

So, I understand there's all sorts of changes in Flappieville.

And all good.

Inspector Le Chat has been given his own show next year.

And thanks to the fresh ideas of Jason and Gus,

The Pound Dog Show has been renewed for another season.

(IN FRENCH ACCENT) Stevie, how do you like your new home?

It's great, Mrs. Fletcher.