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1
00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:17,459
? Some people seem so
obsessed with the morning
2
00:00:17,460 --> 00:00:21,460
? Get up early just to
watch the sun rise
3
00:00:22,550 --> 00:00:26,939
? Some people like it more
when there's fire in the sky
4
00:00:26,940 --> 00:00:30,140
? Worship the sun when it's high
5
00:00:31,740 --> 00:00:35,469
? Some people go
for those sultry evenings
6
00:00:35,470 --> 00:00:39,629
? Sipping cocktails in the
blue, red and grey
7
00:00:39,630 --> 00:00:43,230
? But I like every minute
of the day
8
00:00:49,500 --> 00:00:54,600
? I like every second,
so long as you are on my mind
9
00:00:59,220 --> 00:01:02,229
? Every moment
has its special charm
10
00:01:02,230 --> 00:01:07,130
? It's all right when you're around,
rain or shine
11
00:01:09,420 --> 00:01:13,259
? The people on the hill,
they say I'm lazy
12
00:01:13,260 --> 00:01:17,060
? But when they sleep,
I sing and dance
13
00:01:18,350 --> 00:01:22,069
? Some people have to have
the sultry evenings
14
00:01:22,070 --> 00:01:25,670
? Cocktails in the
blue, red and grey
15
00:01:26,160 --> 00:01:29,939
? But I like every minute
of the day... ?
16
00:01:59,220 --> 00:02:01,999
What did I tell you about
air raids not killing people?
17
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:04,309
My bed simply
went through the floor,
18
00:02:04,310 --> 00:02:06,299
and Plon-Plon and I went on it.
19
00:02:06,300 --> 00:02:08,500
Perfectly comfortable!
20
00:02:09,110 --> 00:02:13,910
Linda Radlett was not only
my favourite cousin...
21
00:02:14,420 --> 00:02:20,020
...but then, and for many years,
my favourite human being.
22
00:02:27,730 --> 00:02:29,830
Don't pity me, Fanny.
23
00:02:33,490 --> 00:02:38,990
I've had five months of perfect
and unalloyed happiness.
24
00:02:39,700 --> 00:02:43,259
Very few people can say that in the
course of long lives, I imagine.
25
00:02:43,260 --> 00:02:44,340
Very few.
26
00:02:46,870 --> 00:02:49,549
As we turned down the drive
at Alconleigh,
27
00:02:49,550 --> 00:02:53,339
I asked myself if Linda's five
months of perfect happiness
28
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:58,579
were quite worth all the chaos and
confusion of the other 29 years.
29
00:02:58,580 --> 00:03:03,779
But I often thought about
things like that with Linda.
30
00:03:03,780 --> 00:03:08,080
It always feels like Christmas,
coming home.
31
00:03:08,630 --> 00:03:09,630
I know.
32
00:03:12,590 --> 00:03:14,769
Ever since I was a small child,
33
00:03:14,770 --> 00:03:17,589
I was sent to spend
the Christmas holidays with Linda
34
00:03:17,590 --> 00:03:24,190
in a large, ugly, north-facing house
high on a hill in Oxfordshire.
35
00:03:24,240 --> 00:03:28,739
Most of these Christmases
were marked with violence.
36
00:03:28,740 --> 00:03:31,349
There was the time Linda's pony
lay on her in the brook
37
00:03:31,350 --> 00:03:33,650
and nearly drowned her.
38
00:03:33,780 --> 00:03:36,909
The time she tried to kill herself
in an attempt to rejoin
39
00:03:36,910 --> 00:03:41,389
a smelly old Border terrier
which Uncle Matthew had put down.
40
00:03:41,390 --> 00:03:43,379
The time she decided to tell
41
00:03:43,380 --> 00:03:47,149
the daughters of some
neighbours the facts of life...
42
00:03:47,150 --> 00:03:52,269
...resulting in dreadful
beatings from Uncle Matthew...
43
00:03:52,270 --> 00:03:56,270
...and luncheon alone
for two whole weeks.
44
00:03:56,950 --> 00:03:59,350
Linda hated to be alone.
45
00:04:00,850 --> 00:04:03,179
She was a wild
and nervous creature,
46
00:04:03,180 --> 00:04:05,980
full of passion and longing.
47
00:04:18,070 --> 00:04:20,179
But of all the Christmases,
48
00:04:20,180 --> 00:04:23,949
the Christmas I remember
the most was when we were 17,
49
00:04:23,950 --> 00:04:28,350
and Linda decided that her
life had to begin.
50
00:05:11,510 --> 00:05:14,579
No, you can't give the dog a cake
before you give me a piece!
51
00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:16,019
That's not fair!
52
00:05:16,020 --> 00:05:18,609
I stumbled into the hall
and found Linda's mother,
53
00:05:18,610 --> 00:05:21,869
my Aunt Sadie, and the children
having tea as they always did,
54
00:05:21,870 --> 00:05:24,949
in front of the fireplace, over
which hung, as it always had,
55
00:05:24,950 --> 00:05:26,819
the entrenching tool
Uncle Matthew had used
56
00:05:26,820 --> 00:05:33,459
to whack to death eight Germans as
they crawled out of a dugout in 1915.
57
00:05:33,460 --> 00:05:35,579
Linda's father, my Uncle Matthew,
58
00:05:35,580 --> 00:05:36,659
knew no middle course.
59
00:05:36,660 --> 00:05:39,349
He either loved or he hated,
60
00:05:39,350 --> 00:05:42,349
and, generally,
it must be said, he hated.
61
00:05:42,350 --> 00:05:46,250
I hate Huns, Frogs,
Americans, Catholics
62
00:05:46,450 --> 00:05:50,739
and all other foreigners,
but above all, I hate children!
63
00:05:50,740 --> 00:05:53,169
He had four beautiful bloodhounds,
64
00:05:53,170 --> 00:05:54,579
with which, every Christmas,
65
00:05:54,580 --> 00:05:57,329
he would hunt his children,
and a pair of stock whips
66
00:05:57,330 --> 00:06:00,059
he cracked on the lawn
every morning at dawn.
67
00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:02,069
Had the Radletts been poor,
68
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,749
he no doubt would have been
sent to prison for beating
69
00:06:04,750 --> 00:06:07,650
and refusing to educate them.
70
00:06:07,830 --> 00:06:11,469
Uncle Matthew loathed
educated females...
71
00:06:11,470 --> 00:06:13,270
...particularly me.
72
00:06:15,420 --> 00:06:17,100
Fanny!
73
00:06:17,940 --> 00:06:19,740
- Fanny!
- You're here!
74
00:06:20,370 --> 00:06:23,579
Fanny, welcome.
You must be exhausted.
75
00:06:23,580 --> 00:06:25,749
Come and have a cup of tea.
How was your journey?
76
00:06:25,750 --> 00:06:27,539
Come and sit in Jassy's chair.
77
00:06:27,540 --> 00:06:30,179
As always, Linda was the most
pleased to see me,
78
00:06:30,180 --> 00:06:31,380
but determined not to show it.
79
00:06:31,381 --> 00:06:32,381
Linda?
80
00:06:32,980 --> 00:06:34,389
Fanny's here.
81
00:06:34,390 --> 00:06:36,179
Would you like a cup of tea?
82
00:06:36,180 --> 00:06:37,620
Yes, please.
83
00:06:42,130 --> 00:06:43,130
Hello.
84
00:06:45,460 --> 00:06:47,360
Where's your mouse?
85
00:06:47,380 --> 00:06:50,389
Oh, she got a sore back and died.
86
00:06:50,390 --> 00:06:52,259
Had you been riding it?
87
00:06:52,260 --> 00:06:55,379
Nobody cried so much
or so often as Linda.
88
00:06:55,380 --> 00:06:58,019
That's how they always die.
It's some sort of urinary disease.
89
00:06:58,020 --> 00:07:04,269
Anything, but especially anything
about animals, would set her off.
90
00:07:04,270 --> 00:07:07,089
Her emotions were
on no ordinary plane.
91
00:07:07,090 --> 00:07:09,139
She loved or she loathed.
92
00:07:09,140 --> 00:07:10,869
She laughed or she cried.
93
00:07:10,870 --> 00:07:14,470
She lived in
a world of superlatives.
94
00:07:20,220 --> 00:07:24,499
Linda was the chairman of a secret
club called the Hons Society.
95
00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:28,019
Its headquarters was a linen
cupboard at the top of the house.
96
00:07:28,020 --> 00:07:29,020
- Six.
- OK.
97
00:07:29,460 --> 00:07:30,829
That's great.
98
00:07:30,830 --> 00:07:32,819
Three-quarters. Well done.
99
00:07:32,820 --> 00:07:34,929
The dead mouse was
quickly forgotten.
100
00:07:34,930 --> 00:07:36,659
Even smaller than last year.
101
00:07:36,660 --> 00:07:39,599
- Your hair's got long.
- Neck, tummy.
102
00:07:39,600 --> 00:07:40,600
One...
103
00:07:42,030 --> 00:07:43,830
Seven and a third.
104
00:07:44,660 --> 00:07:48,360
So I win on arms, eyes,
waist, ankles,
105
00:07:48,370 --> 00:07:51,379
- and you win on bust.
- Hmm. I hate bust.
106
00:07:51,380 --> 00:07:53,280
Farmers love busts!
107
00:07:54,260 --> 00:07:57,299
Linda and I were both in love
with people we had never met,
108
00:07:57,300 --> 00:07:59,219
I with a fat, red-faced
109
00:07:59,220 --> 00:08:00,909
middle-aged farmer I sometimes saw
110
00:08:00,910 --> 00:08:02,769
riding through the village,
111
00:08:02,770 --> 00:08:05,589
and Linda with
the Prince of Wales.
112
00:08:05,590 --> 00:08:08,019
Why can't your prince
and my farmer
113
00:08:08,020 --> 00:08:09,429
be invited to Louisa's ball?
114
00:08:09,430 --> 00:08:12,239
Because Matthew won't let
anyone fanciable
115
00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:14,029
within 50 miles of the house.
116
00:08:14,030 --> 00:08:16,149
A coming-out ball was planned
that Christmas
117
00:08:16,150 --> 00:08:17,749
for Linda's older sister, Louisa.
118
00:08:17,750 --> 00:08:19,029
We're trapped!
119
00:08:19,030 --> 00:08:22,419
Our only hope is the Prince
breaking down in his motor car.
120
00:08:22,420 --> 00:08:27,349
"Pray, who is
that beautiful young lady?
121
00:08:27,350 --> 00:08:28,559
"I wish to marry her."
122
00:08:28,560 --> 00:08:31,439
"Well, you can't!
She's here under lock and key!
123
00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:33,809
"I killed 15 Germans
with an entrenching tool!
124
00:08:33,810 --> 00:08:35,349
"I can certainly kill you!"
125
00:08:35,350 --> 00:08:36,899
"He must have your daughter, sir.
126
00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:39,249
"His happiness depends on it,
and subsequently,
127
00:08:39,250 --> 00:08:42,750
"so does the happiness
of England."
128
00:08:43,380 --> 00:08:46,229
Even then, Linda's fantasies were
altogether more ambitious
129
00:08:46,230 --> 00:08:48,469
and dangerous than mine.
130
00:08:48,470 --> 00:08:50,259
I want to sit next to Fanny!
131
00:08:50,260 --> 00:08:51,919
Oh, you took your time!
132
00:08:51,920 --> 00:08:53,839
- This better be good, Linda.
- It is.
133
00:08:53,840 --> 00:08:56,339
It's so hot in here.
Talk about back to the womb!
134
00:08:56,340 --> 00:08:58,899
It's more welcoming than
my mother's womb, I imagine.
135
00:08:58,900 --> 00:09:01,269
Fanny, it is unfair that you
have wicked parents and not me.
136
00:09:01,270 --> 00:09:04,149
So you aspire to being wicked
and adulterous, do you, Linda?
137
00:09:04,150 --> 00:09:06,069
No. I aspire to true love.
138
00:09:06,070 --> 00:09:08,949
The kind of which only comes once
in a lifetime and lasts for ever.
139
00:09:11,630 --> 00:09:14,899
The news I have for the Hons today,
while of considerable Hon interest,
140
00:09:14,900 --> 00:09:18,099
generally particularly concerns...
141
00:09:18,100 --> 00:09:19,420
- ...Fanny!
- Oh!
142
00:09:21,550 --> 00:09:23,750
Aunt Emily is engaged.
143
00:09:26,030 --> 00:09:27,949
No, Linda, you're making it up.
144
00:09:27,950 --> 00:09:31,750
I found proof.
"My dear sister Sadie...
145
00:09:32,460 --> 00:09:35,509
"..not to tell the children
we're engaged.
146
00:09:35,510 --> 00:09:38,579
"The captain and I will arrive
late on Christmas Eve
147
00:09:38,580 --> 00:09:41,069
"and stay in time for Louisa's
party, of course.
148
00:09:41,070 --> 00:09:43,270
"All love from Emily."
149
00:09:43,380 --> 00:09:45,229
Why would she want
to get married, anyway?
150
00:09:45,230 --> 00:09:46,579
She can't love him.
151
00:09:46,580 --> 00:09:48,949
- He's 40.
- He must be ancient.
152
00:09:48,950 --> 00:09:50,819
Maybe he'll fall in love
with Fanny.
153
00:09:50,820 --> 00:09:54,189
Aunt Emily had brought me up
ever since I was a baby.
154
00:09:54,190 --> 00:09:57,329
It had always been
just her and me.
155
00:09:57,330 --> 00:09:59,949
Aunt Sadie had two sisters -
156
00:09:59,950 --> 00:10:02,129
my mother and Aunt Emily.
157
00:10:02,130 --> 00:10:04,879
At the age of 19, my mother,
158
00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:07,509
feeling herself too
beautiful and gay to be
159
00:10:07,510 --> 00:10:09,749
burdened with a baby,
left my father for another man,
160
00:10:09,750 --> 00:10:13,450
and gave me to Aunt Emily
to bring up.
161
00:10:16,020 --> 00:10:17,359
Goodbye, darling!
162
00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:19,669
My impetuous mother
subsequently ran away so often
163
00:10:19,670 --> 00:10:21,539
and with so many different men
164
00:10:21,540 --> 00:10:27,840
that she became known to her family
and friends as "The Bolter".
165
00:10:29,140 --> 00:10:30,799
There you are, darling...
166
00:10:30,800 --> 00:10:33,229
Occasionally she would reappear
like a meteor,
167
00:10:33,230 --> 00:10:35,539
showering me
with her extravagance,
168
00:10:35,540 --> 00:10:38,289
and I would long to be caught
up in her fiery trails
169
00:10:38,290 --> 00:10:40,490
and be carried away...
170
00:10:41,620 --> 00:10:46,920
...but she would always vanish
off again to a new man.
171
00:10:54,550 --> 00:10:57,229
And in my heart,
I knew how lucky I was
172
00:10:57,230 --> 00:11:01,130
to have safe, reliable,
kind Aunt Emily.
173
00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:23,859
Come on, Fanny!
174
00:11:23,860 --> 00:11:26,160
Get dressed, lazybones!
175
00:11:33,590 --> 00:11:35,829
The Radletts loved animals,
176
00:11:35,830 --> 00:11:38,099
but more than anything
in the world,
177
00:11:38,100 --> 00:11:40,819
they loved to hunt foxes.
178
00:11:40,820 --> 00:11:41,900
All away!
179
00:12:12,690 --> 00:12:13,690
Oh!
180
00:12:22,230 --> 00:12:26,459
Where is her Ladyship, your
mother, hunting this Christmas?
181
00:12:26,460 --> 00:12:28,259
She's in Paris, Josh.
182
00:12:28,260 --> 00:12:31,509
No human being like her Ladyship
I ever saw on a horse.
183
00:12:31,510 --> 00:12:33,109
And look at you.
184
00:12:33,110 --> 00:12:35,149
Jostling about in that saddle.
185
00:12:35,150 --> 00:12:39,569
Miss Linda takes after her Ladyship,
your mother, something wonderful.
186
00:12:39,570 --> 00:12:41,109
Why is that good?
187
00:12:41,110 --> 00:12:45,410
Isn't my mother supposed to
be wicked, Josh?
188
00:12:46,740 --> 00:12:48,540
Here's Fanny!
189
00:12:50,220 --> 00:12:52,859
Darling, may I introduce you
to Captain Warbeck?
190
00:12:52,860 --> 00:12:55,960
Please only ever call me Davey.
191
00:12:56,340 --> 00:12:58,899
He looked different
with his clothes on.
192
00:12:58,900 --> 00:13:05,700
You must find it a terrible joke,
old people like us getting married.
193
00:13:06,830 --> 00:13:08,630
No, of course not.
194
00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:16,910
Captain David Warbeck.
195
00:13:19,310 --> 00:13:21,229
He doesn't look much like
a military man.
196
00:13:21,230 --> 00:13:23,699
Or a marrying one,
for that matter.
197
00:13:23,700 --> 00:13:26,819
Can't see him killing any Germans
with an entrenching tool.
198
00:13:26,820 --> 00:13:27,820
Hm.
199
00:13:32,110 --> 00:13:33,110
Ah...
200
00:13:33,330 --> 00:13:35,130
Ooh.
201
00:13:36,340 --> 00:13:40,629
Matthew is frightening,
and I disapprove of him so,
202
00:13:40,630 --> 00:13:46,130
but in a way I feel he sets
the bar for English manhood.
203
00:13:46,450 --> 00:13:48,010
Don't be sad.
204
00:13:48,110 --> 00:13:50,609
Yeah, but it's always been
just me and Emily.
205
00:13:50,610 --> 00:13:53,910
You'll always have boring old me!
206
00:14:01,300 --> 00:14:06,779
Did you know that ducks can only
copulate in running water?
207
00:14:06,780 --> 00:14:07,780
No.
208
00:14:08,020 --> 00:14:09,809
Good luck to them.
209
00:14:09,810 --> 00:14:13,069
Aunt Emily
copulated last night.
210
00:14:13,070 --> 00:14:15,539
They were all twisted around
each other
211
00:14:15,540 --> 00:14:16,979
when I went in there this morning.
212
00:14:16,980 --> 00:14:17,980
Really?!
213
00:14:19,620 --> 00:14:23,120
Oh, God! How?
Show me! Show me how!
214
00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:26,259
- You're sex obsessed.
- I know, it's true.
215
00:14:26,260 --> 00:14:29,939
I masturbate every time I
think about Lady Jane Grey.
216
00:14:29,940 --> 00:14:31,949
And I think about her
all the time!
217
00:14:31,950 --> 00:14:33,850
Fanny!
218
00:14:38,350 --> 00:14:41,250
Davey! You are a clever cove!
219
00:14:42,510 --> 00:14:45,139
He says these Charles II
salt-shakers
220
00:14:45,140 --> 00:14:47,379
we thought we'd had
in the family for 300 years
221
00:14:47,380 --> 00:14:49,999
are really Georgian imitations,
not valuable at all!
222
00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:56,120
Children, you are so lucky
223
00:14:56,220 --> 00:14:59,149
to be related to this
extraordinary fellow.
224
00:14:59,150 --> 00:15:01,650
Yes, he's a terrific Hon.
225
00:15:02,230 --> 00:15:05,749
Oh, um, well, we have
a Hons Society.
226
00:15:05,750 --> 00:15:08,579
If you're a member,
you're honourable,
227
00:15:08,580 --> 00:15:10,419
and our enemies are
Counter Hons.
228
00:15:10,420 --> 00:15:12,920
I'm honoured to be a Hon!
229
00:15:13,940 --> 00:15:19,189
Davey, maybe you can influence Emily
on the subject of female education.
230
00:15:19,190 --> 00:15:23,149
It's done Fanny absolutely no good
whatsoever, as far as I can tell.
231
00:15:23,150 --> 00:15:24,949
She's picked up some dreadful
expressions
232
00:15:24,950 --> 00:15:26,289
from that school of hers.
233
00:15:26,290 --> 00:15:27,699
Very likely she did.
234
00:15:27,700 --> 00:15:31,029
Awful words like "mantelpiece"
and "notepaper"
235
00:15:31,030 --> 00:15:33,459
keep coming out of her mouth,
and her poor husband,
236
00:15:33,460 --> 00:15:35,379
if she ever gets one...
237
00:15:35,380 --> 00:15:37,169
A lot of men would find it
more irritating
238
00:15:37,170 --> 00:15:39,669
to have a wife who'd never
heard of George III,
239
00:15:39,670 --> 00:15:42,349
or been allowed off their
family premises to pursue
240
00:15:42,350 --> 00:15:44,269
any sort of normal life.
241
00:15:44,270 --> 00:15:47,349
They have absolutely everything
they will ever need here!
242
00:15:47,350 --> 00:15:49,389
Church, stables, tennis court.
243
00:15:49,390 --> 00:15:51,699
Why would they ever want to leave?
244
00:15:51,700 --> 00:15:54,449
You don't have to go to some awful
middle-class establishment
245
00:15:54,450 --> 00:15:56,579
to learn who George III was.
246
00:15:56,580 --> 00:15:59,580
- Anyway, who was he, Fanny?
- Hmm?
247
00:16:03,860 --> 00:16:05,300
He was King.
248
00:16:06,800 --> 00:16:09,000
And he went mad and...
249
00:16:13,200 --> 00:16:15,000
Most illuminating.
250
00:16:15,310 --> 00:16:18,129
Well worth losing every ounce
of feminine charm
251
00:16:18,130 --> 00:16:20,819
to learn that, I must say, Fanny.
252
00:16:20,820 --> 00:16:23,059
Thighs like gateposts from
playing hockey,
253
00:16:23,060 --> 00:16:25,749
and the worst seat on a horse
of any woman I've ever seen.
254
00:16:25,750 --> 00:16:29,250
Linda, you're uneducated,
thank God.
255
00:16:29,340 --> 00:16:33,340
What do you have to say
about George III?
256
00:16:33,550 --> 00:16:37,450
Well, he was the son
of poor Fred and...
257
00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:40,019
...oh, he was the father
of Beau Brummell's fat friend.
258
00:16:40,020 --> 00:16:43,859
Oh, and he was one of those
vacillators, you know?
259
00:16:43,860 --> 00:16:46,669
I am his Highness's dog at Kew
260
00:16:46,670 --> 00:16:48,849
Pray tell me, sir, whose dog
are you?
261
00:16:48,850 --> 00:16:50,530
Ooh! How sweet!
262
00:16:52,750 --> 00:16:55,829
Oh... No, and Fanny doesn't
have thighs like gateposts.
263
00:16:55,830 --> 00:16:58,130
Her thighs are perfect.
264
00:17:02,230 --> 00:17:04,019
I'd like to go to school.
265
00:17:04,020 --> 00:17:05,700
Oh, do shut up!
266
00:17:08,370 --> 00:17:11,249
Matthew's trapped
his daughters here.
267
00:17:11,250 --> 00:17:13,749
They manage to bridge
gulfs of ignorance
268
00:17:13,750 --> 00:17:16,019
with charm and high spirits
269
00:17:16,020 --> 00:17:19,309
and odds and ends of knowledge
they've picked up.
270
00:17:19,310 --> 00:17:22,189
You're better off
not being like Linda.
271
00:17:22,190 --> 00:17:24,629
She lacks all discipline.
272
00:17:24,630 --> 00:17:27,439
Could easily come to nothing.
273
00:17:27,440 --> 00:17:30,299
She does remind me of The Bolter.
274
00:17:30,300 --> 00:17:33,900
I don't want her
to come to nothing.
275
00:17:34,260 --> 00:17:35,260
No.
276
00:18:34,620 --> 00:18:37,329
Please don't bolt.
Don't ever leave me.
277
00:18:37,330 --> 00:18:40,589
Why would I bolt when I'm going
to marry the Prince of Wales?
278
00:18:40,590 --> 00:18:43,590
And have a train 40 feet long.
279
00:18:43,990 --> 00:18:45,670
12 bridesmaids.
280
00:18:45,840 --> 00:18:47,699
And you'll be the chief one.
281
00:18:47,700 --> 00:18:49,429
What happens then?
282
00:18:49,430 --> 00:18:51,789
You'll be happily ever after,
and what about me?
283
00:18:51,790 --> 00:18:53,590
You'll be with me.
284
00:18:55,310 --> 00:18:58,189
Chatting and having baths,
like always,
285
00:18:58,190 --> 00:19:01,909
and being wise and clever
and funny and kind
286
00:19:01,910 --> 00:19:03,949
and the best thing there is,
287
00:19:03,950 --> 00:19:07,650
because you know I'm lost
without you.
288
00:19:08,110 --> 00:19:09,779
What if you die?
289
00:19:09,780 --> 00:19:11,220
I won't die!
290
00:19:12,300 --> 00:19:15,100
I'm not that sort of person.
291
00:19:19,060 --> 00:19:20,740
Darling Linda,
292
00:19:21,430 --> 00:19:24,239
I'm going to drag you
out of this place for ever
293
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:27,629
and copulate with you in running
water like a divine duck,
294
00:19:27,630 --> 00:19:30,319
and my goodness,
how you'll live!
295
00:19:30,320 --> 00:19:34,029
We don't want strangers here,
anyway, stinking the place up.
296
00:19:34,030 --> 00:19:35,759
Well, you'll have to do something,
297
00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:38,899
or there'll be no men at all at your
oldest daughter's coming-out ball.
298
00:19:38,900 --> 00:19:41,139
Oh, shut up!
There's Josh the groom!
299
00:19:41,140 --> 00:19:43,139
And I've plenty of friends
in the House of Lords
300
00:19:43,140 --> 00:19:46,189
who'll be happy to come
if I promise them a shoot.
301
00:19:49,860 --> 00:19:52,149
Despite his suspicion
of strangers,
302
00:19:52,150 --> 00:19:54,539
Uncle Matthew couldn't do
anything to stop
303
00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:55,919
the day of Louisa's ball arriving.
304
00:20:09,940 --> 00:20:12,429
As promised,
Louisa's dance partners
305
00:20:12,430 --> 00:20:17,830
were Uncle Matthew's friends
from the House of Lords...
306
00:20:21,270 --> 00:20:23,370
...and Josh the groom.
307
00:20:26,580 --> 00:20:27,580
Ow!
308
00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:29,459
- Oh, so sorry.
- Oh, no, no, it's fine.
309
00:20:38,420 --> 00:20:39,899
You're very patient.
310
00:20:39,900 --> 00:20:41,100
Thank you.
311
00:20:50,830 --> 00:20:53,030
All so small and ugly.
312
00:20:54,230 --> 00:20:55,790
Old and ugly!
313
00:21:06,070 --> 00:21:12,870
The evening was saved from utter
disillusionment by a late arrival...
314
00:21:13,380 --> 00:21:16,019
...Alconleigh's nearest neighbour.
315
00:21:16,020 --> 00:21:17,700
? Pawn of none
316
00:21:18,420 --> 00:21:22,020
? Born with steel reins
on the heart
317
00:21:22,580 --> 00:21:24,280
? Of the sun... ?
318
00:21:24,540 --> 00:21:28,140
Lord Merlin was an artist,
a musician
319
00:21:28,590 --> 00:21:30,579
and a patron of all the young.
320
00:21:30,580 --> 00:21:34,180
? Exalted companion
of cocaine nights
321
00:21:35,700 --> 00:21:39,300
? Cos he's a Dandy
in the Underworld
322
00:21:39,730 --> 00:21:42,730
? Dandy in the Underworld... ?
323
00:21:43,830 --> 00:21:45,150
What a set!
324
00:21:47,670 --> 00:21:49,779
It was rumoured he had
two black whippets
325
00:21:49,780 --> 00:21:53,109
who wore diamond necklaces,
and a playhouse in the garden
326
00:21:53,110 --> 00:21:56,459
where he put on such extravagances
as Dada plays from Paris
327
00:21:56,460 --> 00:21:59,260
and jazz poetry from Harlem.
328
00:22:00,980 --> 00:22:03,580
Uncle Matthew loathed him.
329
00:22:04,560 --> 00:22:07,560
There's a man carrying a comb!
330
00:22:08,700 --> 00:22:09,700
Davey!
331
00:22:10,190 --> 00:22:12,590
? To destruction he fell
332
00:22:12,660 --> 00:22:17,760
? Now he forever stalks
the ancient mansions of hell
333
00:22:18,130 --> 00:22:21,730
? Cos he's a Dandy
in the Underworld
334
00:22:22,160 --> 00:22:24,660
? Dandy in the Underworld
335
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:28,340
? When will he come up for air? ?
336
00:22:29,140 --> 00:22:31,509
I can introduce you, if you like.
337
00:22:31,510 --> 00:22:32,710
No, Davey.
338
00:22:33,550 --> 00:22:35,950
Our dresses are too bad.
339
00:22:37,620 --> 00:22:39,620
? Sha-la shoo-be-doo
340
00:22:40,270 --> 00:22:42,170
? Sha-la shoo-be-doo
341
00:22:43,410 --> 00:22:46,210
? Sha-la shoo-be-doo, ahh! ?
342
00:22:46,740 --> 00:22:48,789
I'm going to the cupboard.
343
00:22:48,790 --> 00:22:50,069
Yes, me too.
344
00:22:50,070 --> 00:22:52,070
? Sha-la shoo-be-doo
345
00:22:52,430 --> 00:22:54,330
? Sha-la shoo-be-doo
346
00:22:55,310 --> 00:22:57,910
? Sha-la shoo-be-doo, ahh!
347
00:23:00,540 --> 00:23:04,019
? Cos he's a Dandy
in the Underworld
348
00:23:04,020 --> 00:23:06,520
? Dandy in the Underworld
349
00:23:07,280 --> 00:23:10,380
? When will he come up for air?
350
00:23:11,700 --> 00:23:14,600
? Oh, will anybody ever care?
351
00:23:18,230 --> 00:23:21,830
? Cos he's a Dandy
in the Underworld
352
00:23:21,940 --> 00:23:24,940
? Dandy in the Underworld... ?
353
00:23:40,110 --> 00:23:43,139
I'm officially renouncing
His Royal Highness.
354
00:23:43,140 --> 00:23:44,819
From now on I will devote myself
355
00:23:44,820 --> 00:23:48,749
to being one of those bright
young things of Merlin's.
356
00:23:48,750 --> 00:23:52,979
Merlin's friends are more
in my mother's... orbit.
357
00:23:52,980 --> 00:23:57,180
Oh, they're so beautiful
and sophisticated.
358
00:23:59,700 --> 00:24:02,129
Don't you just...
359
00:24:02,130 --> 00:24:05,459
...ache for life
to be exciting, like this?
360
00:24:05,460 --> 00:24:09,059
Hm. I think I'd like to
observe exciting things.
361
00:24:10,260 --> 00:24:12,689
If only there were
exciting things!
362
00:24:12,690 --> 00:24:13,690
You!
363
00:24:13,710 --> 00:24:16,210
You're an exciting thing!
364
00:24:16,340 --> 00:24:18,340
You are!
365
00:24:20,700 --> 00:24:21,700
We are.
366
00:24:27,730 --> 00:24:30,330
We do everything together.
367
00:24:32,340 --> 00:24:34,740
I'd be lost without you.
368
00:24:40,530 --> 00:24:43,469
But the brief appearance
of Lord Merlin's house party
369
00:24:43,470 --> 00:24:47,459
only made the walls of Linda's
fortress appear higher than ever.
370
00:24:47,460 --> 00:24:50,899
She became paralysed in
her longing for life and love,
371
00:24:50,900 --> 00:24:54,349
and all she could do
was lie about waiting for it.
372
00:24:57,750 --> 00:24:59,989
- What's the time, darling?
- Guess.
373
00:24:59,990 --> 00:25:02,699
- Quarter to six.
- Better than that.
374
00:25:02,700 --> 00:25:04,589
- Six.
- Not quite so good.
375
00:25:04,590 --> 00:25:06,030
- Five to.
- Yes!
376
00:25:06,190 --> 00:25:09,290
It's forever until we come out!
377
00:25:09,780 --> 00:25:11,699
I can't live that long!
378
00:25:11,700 --> 00:25:14,069
"As long as she thinks of a man,
379
00:25:14,070 --> 00:25:15,899
"nobody objects to a woman
thinking."
380
00:25:15,900 --> 00:25:18,349
That's what Virginia Woolf
has to say.
381
00:25:18,350 --> 00:25:20,939
Well, then, no-one will object,
cos I only think about men.
382
00:25:20,940 --> 00:25:23,349
Maybe that's because you
haven't been educated properly.
383
00:25:23,350 --> 00:25:25,739
Or maybe it's because
everything else is boring!
384
00:25:25,740 --> 00:25:28,019
What is it you actually want?
385
00:25:28,020 --> 00:25:30,620
I want to escape!
386
00:25:32,340 --> 00:25:37,540
And have fun and wear high heels
and go to the cinema
387
00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:42,869
and have sex and be adored
by a man and be in love!
388
00:25:42,870 --> 00:25:44,570
What do you want?
389
00:25:50,700 --> 00:25:53,100
Is life only about love?
390
00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:54,360
- Oh.
- Yes!
391
00:26:01,750 --> 00:26:05,650
Louisa's dance had
an unexpected sequel.
392
00:26:15,380 --> 00:26:20,480
I don't know why you'd
want to marry someone so old.
393
00:26:21,460 --> 00:26:23,699
Louisa, half his hair
has slipped off his head,
394
00:26:23,700 --> 00:26:25,299
like an eiderdown off the bed!
395
00:26:25,300 --> 00:26:28,000
- He's only 45.
- And you're 18!
396
00:26:28,020 --> 00:26:30,179
If he was a dog,
you'd have to put him down.
397
00:26:30,180 --> 00:26:33,059
I'm happy for
the first time in my life!
398
00:26:33,060 --> 00:26:34,739
I'm getting out... for ever.
399
00:26:34,740 --> 00:26:36,539
And you're going to be
stuck here, Linda,
400
00:26:36,540 --> 00:26:38,479
hunting and walking the
dogs with Fa.
401
00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:40,347
That's what comes
of being the favourite.
402
00:26:40,348 --> 00:26:41,062
Shut up!
403
00:26:41,064 --> 00:26:44,057
Don't you think you're a bit too old
to be sitting in a cupboard?
404
00:26:44,059 --> 00:26:45,424
No, not really.
405
00:26:47,510 --> 00:26:49,499
I'm not having any bridesmaids,
by the way,
406
00:26:49,500 --> 00:26:51,349
so don't worry about your dresses.
407
00:26:51,350 --> 00:26:52,350
What?
408
00:26:52,820 --> 00:26:55,629
I'm not going to be upstaged on my
wedding day, thank you very much!
409
00:26:55,630 --> 00:26:58,859
Ohh! You're not having any
bridesmaids?
410
00:26:58,867 --> 00:26:59,759
No.
411
00:26:59,761 --> 00:27:04,081
You can't think how stupid
you're going to look from behind!
412
00:27:06,390 --> 00:27:07,390
Oh.
413
00:27:08,110 --> 00:27:11,110
Linda was really very jealous.
414
00:27:16,950 --> 00:27:20,750
- Shall we go, then, Papa?
- Yes, let's go.
415
00:27:22,830 --> 00:27:26,869
She looks like the eldest and
ugliest of the Bronte sisters.
416
00:27:26,870 --> 00:27:28,149
At that moment,
417
00:27:28,150 --> 00:27:30,899
I think Linda would have gladly
changed places with Louisa,
418
00:27:30,900 --> 00:27:32,499
even at the very heavy cost
419
00:27:32,500 --> 00:27:35,379
of living happily ever after with
John Fort-William.
420
00:27:35,380 --> 00:27:36,789
I want to die!
421
00:27:36,790 --> 00:27:41,909
Unless life begins absolutely
right now, I want to die!
422
00:27:41,910 --> 00:27:43,309
Push me, will you?
423
00:27:43,310 --> 00:27:46,259
Can you please...? Can you get
down, Linda, it's really high.
424
00:27:51,660 --> 00:27:53,999
If only it weren't such
a difficult thing to do.
425
00:27:55,670 --> 00:27:57,969
It's hard enough to kill
a rabbit, let alone oneself.
426
00:27:59,510 --> 00:28:01,379
It's that hog Merlin!
427
00:28:01,380 --> 00:28:05,269
I won't have my home filled
with Merlin's dago friends!
428
00:28:05,270 --> 00:28:07,309
I hear he has Frogs there too!
429
00:28:07,310 --> 00:28:09,749
I won't have Frogs or dagos
under any circumstances!
430
00:28:09,750 --> 00:28:11,149
Hello, Merlin.
431
00:28:11,150 --> 00:28:13,750
Oh, lunch would be lovely.
432
00:28:24,790 --> 00:28:26,829
What sort of birds are they?
433
00:28:26,830 --> 00:28:28,979
Just ordinary pigeons.
434
00:28:28,980 --> 00:28:32,269
Where do you get them that colour?
435
00:28:32,270 --> 00:28:34,509
I dye them. Every year.
436
00:28:34,510 --> 00:28:36,309
Dry them in the linen cupboard.
437
00:28:36,310 --> 00:28:38,739
- Isn't that frightfully cruel?
- Oh, no, they love it.
438
00:28:38,740 --> 00:28:41,229
They love it. It makes them
so pretty for each other.
439
00:28:41,230 --> 00:28:46,139
- What about their poor little eyes?
- Oh, they soon learn to shut them.
440
00:28:46,140 --> 00:28:51,299
I see you're taken with my silly
old Romantic Antoine Watteaus.
441
00:28:51,300 --> 00:28:52,979
Love isn't silly.
442
00:28:52,980 --> 00:28:54,869
- Linda!
- It's my religion.
443
00:28:57,900 --> 00:28:59,460
Is it really?
444
00:28:59,540 --> 00:29:02,349
That's all she can think about.
It's really rather alarming.
445
00:29:02,350 --> 00:29:03,910
Oh!
446
00:29:04,020 --> 00:29:06,829
Gertie, leave her alone.
I'm so sorry.
447
00:29:06,830 --> 00:29:10,030
No, um...
I try to tell the girls
448
00:29:10,500 --> 00:29:12,909
that they've got to consider
practicalities.
449
00:29:12,910 --> 00:29:17,389
They've got to write down how they'd
run a household on �200 a year.
450
00:29:17,390 --> 00:29:20,659
Linda always just puts
"�199 - flowers".
451
00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:25,340
What lessons are you doing?
452
00:29:27,310 --> 00:29:28,750
None at all.
453
00:29:29,870 --> 00:29:32,459
Pa thinks that girls get fat
thighs from playing hockey
454
00:29:32,460 --> 00:29:34,869
if they go to school, but not that
Fanny has fat thighs.
455
00:29:34,870 --> 00:29:36,209
Hers are perfect.
456
00:29:36,210 --> 00:29:39,010
No, no, no, no, no. Linda...
457
00:29:40,110 --> 00:29:41,670
...you need...
458
00:29:42,180 --> 00:29:43,620
...educating.
459
00:29:43,830 --> 00:29:45,939
Yeah, that's what I said,
460
00:29:45,940 --> 00:29:48,840
but she doesn't listen to me.
461
00:30:46,230 --> 00:30:50,189
You have an intensely
romantic character.
462
00:30:50,190 --> 00:30:51,190
Hm.
463
00:30:51,220 --> 00:30:53,220
I see trouble ahead.
464
00:30:56,270 --> 00:30:58,389
I urge upon you the necessity
465
00:30:58,390 --> 00:31:02,090
for an intellectual background,
Linda.
466
00:31:02,610 --> 00:31:03,610
Hm!
467
00:31:04,020 --> 00:31:05,820
Although I fear...
468
00:31:06,780 --> 00:31:09,680
...it may already be too late.
469
00:31:20,150 --> 00:31:21,830
Come on, then.
470
00:31:28,270 --> 00:31:32,179
For a while, Linda followed his
advice, finding comfort in books
471
00:31:32,180 --> 00:31:36,299
and things other than
the desperate pursuit of love,
472
00:31:36,300 --> 00:31:38,459
But finally, inevitably,
473
00:31:38,460 --> 00:31:41,139
the minutes turned to hours,
the hours to weeks,
474
00:31:41,140 --> 00:31:42,669
the weeks to months,
475
00:31:42,670 --> 00:31:45,470
and the impossible happened.
476
00:32:07,830 --> 00:32:13,230
We'd attained the great golden
goal of every childhood.
477
00:32:13,270 --> 00:32:14,950
We'd grown up.
478
00:33:00,430 --> 00:33:02,830
Would you like to dance?
479
00:33:04,080 --> 00:33:05,640
Yes, I would.
480
00:33:18,350 --> 00:33:22,899
Tony Kroesig - in his last year at
Oxford, a member of the Bullingdon.
481
00:33:22,900 --> 00:33:25,199
A splendid young man
with plenty of beautiful horses
482
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:26,989
and exquisite clothes,
483
00:33:26,990 --> 00:33:29,489
he had already
a strong air of pomposity,
484
00:33:29,490 --> 00:33:31,539
a thing which Linda had never
come across before...
485
00:33:31,540 --> 00:33:33,184
It's awfully muddy
where you live.
486
00:33:33,285 --> 00:33:33,909
Hm!
487
00:33:33,910 --> 00:33:37,169
I hope your chauffeur knows
how to park a Rolls-Royce!
488
00:33:39,350 --> 00:33:40,350
Yes.
489
00:33:41,070 --> 00:33:44,870
...and which she found
not unattractive.
490
00:33:59,950 --> 00:34:02,750
Who's that sewer with Linda?
491
00:34:03,600 --> 00:34:07,629
Kroesig. Governor of
the Bank of England - his son.
492
00:34:07,630 --> 00:34:08,710
Kroesig?!
493
00:34:09,680 --> 00:34:10,760
Good God!
494
00:34:12,540 --> 00:34:15,829
Never expected to be harbouring
a full-blooded Hun in the house!
495
00:34:15,830 --> 00:34:19,789
Matthew, dear, don't get excited.
The Kroesigs aren't Huns.
496
00:34:19,790 --> 00:34:22,099
They're a highly respected
family of bankers.
497
00:34:22,100 --> 00:34:24,059
They've been over here
for generations.
498
00:34:24,060 --> 00:34:25,549
Once a Hun, always a Hun.
499
00:34:25,550 --> 00:34:26,630
Good God!
500
00:34:28,980 --> 00:34:30,989
Does he know I still have
an entrenching tool
501
00:34:30,990 --> 00:34:32,939
I used to whack eight
of his countrymen to death?
502
00:34:32,940 --> 00:34:35,340
I don't suppose he does.
503
00:34:38,940 --> 00:34:42,449
I always said Merlin would bring
foreigners here eventually.
504
00:34:42,450 --> 00:34:47,450
I never thought he'd land us
with an actual German!
505
00:35:16,180 --> 00:35:19,180
Oh, no, look! The poor rabbit!
506
00:35:36,210 --> 00:35:37,210
Oh!
507
00:35:41,940 --> 00:35:44,719
This was the one romantic
gesture of Tony's life.
508
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:49,269
Tony went back to Oxford,
509
00:35:49,270 --> 00:35:53,939
and Linda sat about waiting
for the telephone bell.
510
00:35:53,940 --> 00:35:55,940
If this comes out...
511
00:35:56,950 --> 00:35:59,150
...he'll ring tomorrow.
512
00:36:03,030 --> 00:36:05,030
If this comes out...
513
00:36:06,420 --> 00:36:08,099
...he'll be at the meet.
514
00:36:09,900 --> 00:36:11,349
If this comes out...
515
00:36:11,350 --> 00:36:13,619
...he's thinking of me
at this very minute.
516
00:36:20,700 --> 00:36:21,700
Hello.
517
00:36:22,350 --> 00:36:24,450
Hello. Is that Linda?
518
00:36:25,300 --> 00:36:27,059
It's Tony Kroesig here.
519
00:36:27,060 --> 00:36:28,500
Hello, Tony.
520
00:36:28,950 --> 00:36:30,549
Listen, will you come to lunch?
521
00:36:30,550 --> 00:36:32,659
Christchurch, next Thursday,
one o'clock?
522
00:36:32,660 --> 00:36:36,309
Oh, but... Fa doesn't let us alone
with young men unchaperoned.
523
00:36:36,310 --> 00:36:38,419
He doesn't really let us out,
full stop.
524
00:36:38,420 --> 00:36:40,100
Really?
525
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:42,259
You seem too old
for that sort of restriction.
526
00:36:42,260 --> 00:36:45,069
Um... Bring your cousin
if you like.
527
00:36:45,070 --> 00:36:46,270
All right!
528
00:36:46,870 --> 00:36:48,719
That'd be lovely.
529
00:36:48,720 --> 00:36:50,160
- Bye.
- Goodbye.
530
00:36:50,580 --> 00:36:53,709
You can't go, because Matthew
will throttle you.
531
00:36:53,710 --> 00:36:55,859
I will actually die if I don't go,
532
00:36:55,860 --> 00:36:59,360
so, you see,
I'd be dead either way.
533
00:36:59,790 --> 00:37:02,099
We have to escape
the fortress, Fanny.
534
00:37:02,100 --> 00:37:05,429
There was only one way
we could devise to escape,
535
00:37:05,430 --> 00:37:06,659
and it was full of risk.
536
00:37:06,660 --> 00:37:09,299
A very dull girl
of exactly our age
537
00:37:09,300 --> 00:37:10,989
called Lavender Davis
538
00:37:10,990 --> 00:37:14,509
lived with her very dull parents
about five miles away.
539
00:37:14,510 --> 00:37:18,099
Once in a blue moon, Linda,
complaining vociferously,
540
00:37:18,100 --> 00:37:21,059
was sent over to
luncheon with them,
541
00:37:21,060 --> 00:37:24,760
driving herself in
Sadie's little car.
542
00:37:25,910 --> 00:37:28,339
Why are you two dressed up
for breakfast?
543
00:37:28,340 --> 00:37:30,829
Lavender Davis wants us
to go over to lunch there.
544
00:37:30,830 --> 00:37:33,069
Oh, duck, you can't have
the car, I'm afraid.
545
00:37:33,070 --> 00:37:34,539
Perkins is going to wash it.
546
00:37:34,540 --> 00:37:36,899
But, Mummy, you don't...
you don't understand.
547
00:37:36,900 --> 00:37:40,749
The whole point is that a man's
coming who brought up a baby badger.
548
00:37:40,750 --> 00:37:42,609
And I do so want to meet him.
549
00:37:42,610 --> 00:37:44,909
When we go to London
for the season,
550
00:37:44,910 --> 00:37:47,349
you'll barely have
time for a badger.
551
00:37:47,350 --> 00:37:51,509
Badgers are nocturnal anyway,
so you wouldn't even see it.
552
00:37:51,510 --> 00:37:52,909
Good point...
553
00:37:52,910 --> 00:37:56,819
Darling Jassy, lend me
your running-away money.
554
00:37:56,820 --> 00:37:57,900
What? No.
555
00:37:58,800 --> 00:38:02,069
I've saved and scraped
ever since I was seven
556
00:38:02,070 --> 00:38:04,109
for when I plan to
run away myself.
557
00:38:04,110 --> 00:38:06,549
I've no education or training,
so I'll need every penny.
558
00:38:06,550 --> 00:38:09,619
Just enough for a couple of
train tickets to Oxford.
559
00:38:09,620 --> 00:38:11,789
Darling, I'll give it all back.
560
00:38:11,790 --> 00:38:12,990
Tony will.
561
00:38:13,070 --> 00:38:14,390
I know men.
562
00:38:15,510 --> 00:38:16,979
Who has a badger?
563
00:38:16,980 --> 00:38:18,709
Last time,
you said you didn't mind
564
00:38:18,710 --> 00:38:21,179
if you never saw the Davises
again in your whole life!
565
00:38:21,180 --> 00:38:22,260
Oh, dear.
566
00:38:22,740 --> 00:38:25,429
You said you wanted to bash
Lavender Davis's face in
567
00:38:25,430 --> 00:38:26,509
with a mallet.
568
00:38:26,510 --> 00:38:28,179
Yes, she did say that.
569
00:38:28,180 --> 00:38:30,059
Come on, Fanny. Let's go!
570
00:38:30,060 --> 00:38:33,109
It's barely nine o'clock
in the morning! Girls!
571
00:38:34,980 --> 00:38:37,880
Deceptacon by Le Tigre
572
00:38:44,500 --> 00:38:46,600
? Every day and night
573
00:38:47,700 --> 00:38:49,800
? Every day and night
574
00:38:50,580 --> 00:38:53,819
? I can see your disco disco dick
575
00:38:53,820 --> 00:38:56,469
? Is sucking my heart
out of my mind
576
00:38:56,470 --> 00:38:59,349
? I'm outta time,
I'm outta fucking time
577
00:38:59,350 --> 00:39:02,479
? I'm a gasoline gut with
a vaseline mind
578
00:39:02,480 --> 00:39:05,869
? Wanna disco?
Wanna see me disco...? ?
579
00:39:08,110 --> 00:39:10,410
? One, two, three, four
580
00:39:11,510 --> 00:39:13,979
? You got what you been asking for
581
00:39:13,980 --> 00:39:15,599
? You're so policy free and
582
00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:18,229
? Your fantasy wheels
and everything you think
583
00:39:18,230 --> 00:39:19,859
? And everything you feel
584
00:39:19,860 --> 00:39:23,149
? Is all right, all right,
all right, all... ?
585
00:39:25,140 --> 00:39:29,429
They're so serious.
It's like church.
586
00:39:29,430 --> 00:39:31,379
Do you think that we
would be as clever?
587
00:39:31,380 --> 00:39:34,289
If you evened it all out, I mean.
588
00:39:34,290 --> 00:39:36,469
Bath time!
589
00:39:45,430 --> 00:39:47,630
Last one in's a sissy!
590
00:39:49,910 --> 00:39:52,149
We must keep our ends up, Fanny.
591
00:39:52,150 --> 00:39:55,650
I think I'm happy
with my end down.
592
00:40:11,670 --> 00:40:13,979
Come on, let's do it.
We'd look so chic.
593
00:40:18,070 --> 00:40:20,429
Davey says it's deadly
to talk about hunting.
594
00:40:20,430 --> 00:40:24,849
Of course I won't!
They're intellectuals.
595
00:40:24,850 --> 00:40:25,850
Hello.
596
00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:28,000
Been hunting at all?
597
00:40:29,340 --> 00:40:31,569
Yes, actually.
We were out yesterday.
598
00:40:31,570 --> 00:40:33,250
- Good day?
- Great.
599
00:40:33,620 --> 00:40:35,300
Actually very.
600
00:40:35,410 --> 00:40:40,589
We found at once and we had a
five-mile point and then we...
601
00:40:40,590 --> 00:40:42,709
- That's marvellous.
- Yes!
602
00:40:42,710 --> 00:40:44,819
Yeah. Well, we had a good
day yesterday too.
603
00:40:44,820 --> 00:40:46,989
Then my first horse went lame.
604
00:40:46,990 --> 00:40:49,190
- Terrible shame.
- Ah, no.
605
00:40:49,260 --> 00:40:52,309
He'd been looking
awfully good all year.
606
00:40:52,310 --> 00:40:53,630
- Come on!
- Mm!
607
00:40:54,350 --> 00:40:55,739
Here they are!
608
00:40:55,740 --> 00:40:58,389
About time! I said one o'clock,
not five past.
609
00:41:02,350 --> 00:41:05,549
Go and have some of that
cheese. Mummy sent this up.
610
00:41:08,750 --> 00:41:10,450
Talk to that man.
611
00:41:10,550 --> 00:41:12,339
Say something clever.
612
00:41:13,870 --> 00:41:14,870
Oh...
613
00:41:15,220 --> 00:41:16,660
- Hello!
- Hello.
614
00:41:17,390 --> 00:41:20,339
I'm a big fan
of Virginia Woolf.
615
00:41:20,340 --> 00:41:22,739
Have you read Orlando? You look
rather like The Bolter.
616
00:41:22,740 --> 00:41:25,199
A sort of Home Counties version.
617
00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:26,900
That's my mother.
618
00:41:27,830 --> 00:41:29,299
I shouldn't think so.
619
00:41:29,300 --> 00:41:31,669
You're much too old to be
a child of The Bolter.
620
00:41:31,670 --> 00:41:34,349
Is she still with
her white hunter?
621
00:41:34,350 --> 00:41:37,650
What's all that hair
on your nose?
622
00:41:40,500 --> 00:41:42,549
- Oh, my goodness.
- Fanny, is there a hair...?
623
00:41:55,260 --> 00:41:56,260
Yes!
624
00:41:56,750 --> 00:41:58,799
You got away lightly.
625
00:42:00,720 --> 00:42:02,160
To the King.
626
00:42:04,820 --> 00:42:06,349
Drink it all!
627
00:42:06,350 --> 00:42:08,030
Oh... Two! Whoo!
628
00:42:08,980 --> 00:42:11,780
This isn't really enjoyable.
629
00:42:14,740 --> 00:42:16,789
A ghastly feeling of guilt is
beginning to give me
630
00:42:16,790 --> 00:42:18,659
a pain rather like indigestion.
631
00:42:18,660 --> 00:42:21,069
Yes, me too. Every time
the door opens,
632
00:42:21,070 --> 00:42:23,699
I'm sure Uncle Matthew's going
to be there cracking his whip.
633
00:42:23,700 --> 00:42:24,700
OK...
634
00:42:27,180 --> 00:42:28,979
I think we'd better go.
635
00:42:28,980 --> 00:42:29,980
Yes.
636
00:42:33,940 --> 00:42:35,729
- Shall... shall we?
- Yes, I know.
637
00:42:35,730 --> 00:42:37,630
Come on, baby.
638
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:39,840
- Going to go?
- Yes.
639
00:42:40,340 --> 00:42:42,709
FANNY: Oh, shush now.
640
00:42:42,710 --> 00:42:44,219
You poor darling.
641
00:42:44,220 --> 00:42:47,379
But you know that you have to
kiss a lot of frogs
642
00:42:47,380 --> 00:42:49,299
before you find your prince...
643
00:42:49,300 --> 00:42:50,620
...of Wales!
644
00:42:55,310 --> 00:42:56,750
Oh, Fanny...
645
00:42:56,940 --> 00:42:58,380
Fanny, help.
646
00:43:00,430 --> 00:43:04,930
Love has increased threefold
in one short day.
647
00:43:07,990 --> 00:43:08,990
But why?
648
00:43:09,660 --> 00:43:11,560
I love him!
649
00:43:11,950 --> 00:43:13,630
Oh, Linda, why?
650
00:43:15,670 --> 00:43:17,230
Linda! Linda!
651
00:43:20,150 --> 00:43:22,150
Linda!
652
00:43:24,180 --> 00:43:25,180
Linda!
653
00:43:43,980 --> 00:43:47,080
I have received a phone call...
654
00:43:52,500 --> 00:43:54,180
...telling me...
655
00:43:55,280 --> 00:43:57,139
...that someone has left a scarf
656
00:43:57,140 --> 00:44:00,540
in Tony Kroesig's rooms at Oxford.
657
00:44:05,270 --> 00:44:09,070
Now we know -
you're not to be trusted.
658
00:44:09,550 --> 00:44:11,579
So we'll have to take
certain steps.
659
00:44:11,580 --> 00:44:13,139
Fanny, you will go
straight home.
660
00:44:13,140 --> 00:44:16,209
Emily can... try to control you
in the future, if she can.
661
00:44:16,210 --> 00:44:18,449
But you'll go the same way
as your mother The Bolter,
662
00:44:18,450 --> 00:44:19,821
as sure as eggs is eggs.
663
00:44:19,823 --> 00:44:21,626
Fa, you can't keep us
locked up forever -
664
00:44:21,627 --> 00:44:23,249
we're practically
middle-aged women!
665
00:44:23,250 --> 00:44:25,570
- Don't interrupt your father.
- Fanny is a scarlet woman -
666
00:44:25,571 --> 00:44:27,789
that's what we'd have
called her in the old days.
667
00:44:27,790 --> 00:44:30,229
- I didn't even want to go.
- And as for you, miss!
668
00:44:30,230 --> 00:44:32,469
You're worse, worse than
The Bolter, imagine that!
669
00:44:32,470 --> 00:44:34,139
Please stop it
about The Bolter.
670
00:44:34,140 --> 00:44:35,939
- No-one here is like her.
- It's all unfair
671
00:44:35,940 --> 00:44:37,989
because I always feel
like I'm the terrible person,
672
00:44:37,990 --> 00:44:39,629
and then Linda always
seems so innocent.
673
00:44:39,630 --> 00:44:42,069
I blame that depraved sewer Merlin.
674
00:44:42,070 --> 00:44:43,669
Merlin's not depraved!
675
00:44:43,670 --> 00:44:47,119
He travels abroad and reads books
and is sophisticated.
676
00:44:47,120 --> 00:44:49,549
- Travels abroad?
- Yes, and his house
677
00:44:49,550 --> 00:44:51,419
is beautiful and comfortable
and warm,
678
00:44:51,420 --> 00:44:54,029
a place to live in, and not
some freezing medieval fortress
679
00:44:54,030 --> 00:44:55,859
to rush out from
and kill things all day.
680
00:44:55,860 --> 00:44:58,319
I can't sit in a cupboard with
Fanny for the rest of my life!
681
00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:01,269
Well, you won't have to, cos Fanny's
never coming back here again!
682
00:45:01,270 --> 00:45:03,311
And there can be no
question of a London season now.
683
00:45:03,312 --> 00:45:04,070
- Fa, please!
- No!
684
00:45:04,071 --> 00:45:06,471
We shall have to watch you every
minute of the day in future.
685
00:45:06,472 --> 00:45:10,029
You're damn lucky
not to get a thrashing.
686
00:45:10,030 --> 00:45:11,949
Now go to your rooms, both of you.
687
00:45:11,950 --> 00:45:15,179
And you're not to speak
to each other before Fanny leaves!
688
00:45:15,180 --> 00:45:17,459
Luckily, no-one will give them
a second glance now
689
00:45:17,460 --> 00:45:19,860
with that dreadful hair.
690
00:45:31,030 --> 00:45:33,430
Goodbye, Fanny! Goodbye!
691
00:45:33,590 --> 00:45:35,270
Goodbye, Linda.
692
00:45:36,470 --> 00:45:38,259
Oh, we are unlucky to be us!
693
00:45:38,260 --> 00:45:39,820
Bye, darling!
694
00:45:40,140 --> 00:45:45,040
Of course,
we were allowed a London season.
695
00:45:47,220 --> 00:45:49,269
? Give my love to London
696
00:45:49,270 --> 00:45:51,670
? Say I'll be there soon
697
00:45:51,900 --> 00:45:54,200
? Meet me in Piccadilly
698
00:45:54,540 --> 00:45:56,819
? And we'll dance by the light
of the moon... ?
699
00:45:56,820 --> 00:45:59,699
The English upper-class
version of the puberty ritual
700
00:45:59,700 --> 00:46:01,400
finally happened.
701
00:46:01,430 --> 00:46:03,669
Isn't it lovely to be lovely us?
702
00:46:03,670 --> 00:46:05,709
We came out into the world -
703
00:46:05,710 --> 00:46:09,179
18 years old
and ready for a husband.
704
00:46:09,180 --> 00:46:11,149
Do you get up to Scotland much?
705
00:46:11,150 --> 00:46:12,819
Care for nightclubs?
706
00:46:12,820 --> 00:46:15,320
I say, have you come far?
707
00:46:15,700 --> 00:46:18,069
We met last night
at William Stonor's.
708
00:46:18,070 --> 00:46:19,349
Don't you remember?
709
00:46:19,350 --> 00:46:20,350
No.
710
00:46:20,950 --> 00:46:21,950
Uh...
711
00:46:24,790 --> 00:46:28,179
But Linda was still
in her dream of love for Tony.
712
00:46:28,180 --> 00:46:31,380
And Tony was nowhere to be seen.
713
00:46:33,180 --> 00:46:35,280
Oh, what's the point?
714
00:46:36,180 --> 00:46:39,880
I missed my only chance
for happiness.
715
00:46:40,020 --> 00:46:41,819
I'm going to be a sour,
716
00:46:41,820 --> 00:46:44,820
wizened up, toothless old maid
717
00:46:45,200 --> 00:46:47,000
and die in a hole.
718
00:46:48,590 --> 00:46:49,590
Me too.
719
00:46:50,640 --> 00:46:55,040
We'll have each other
to dribble on at least.
720
00:47:05,750 --> 00:47:07,310
Hello, Linda.
721
00:47:07,410 --> 00:47:09,299
I've been looking
everywhere for you.
722
00:47:09,300 --> 00:47:10,300
Really?
723
00:47:10,930 --> 00:47:12,979
Shall I show you the balcony?
724
00:47:12,980 --> 00:47:13,980
Yes.
725
00:47:31,500 --> 00:47:33,709
Hello, darling!
726
00:47:33,710 --> 00:47:35,610
You've got so tall!
727
00:47:36,150 --> 00:47:37,429
Hello, Bolter.
728
00:47:37,430 --> 00:47:38,430
Mummy.
729
00:47:39,090 --> 00:47:40,770
I'm your mummy!
730
00:47:42,900 --> 00:47:45,429
Was that Linda
I just saw you with?
731
00:47:45,430 --> 00:47:46,430
Yes.
732
00:47:46,860 --> 00:47:49,269
Oh, no, it's such a mistake
to be friends with girls
733
00:47:49,270 --> 00:47:51,119
who are more beautiful
than one is, darling.
734
00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:53,339
It's too dispiriting.
Who was she with?
735
00:47:53,340 --> 00:47:54,900
Tony Kroesig.
736
00:47:54,960 --> 00:47:56,160
Tony?! Oh.
737
00:47:56,630 --> 00:47:58,310
That won't last.
738
00:48:01,500 --> 00:48:04,379
I want you to meet
my friend, Colin.
739
00:48:04,380 --> 00:48:05,940
He's so nice!
740
00:48:06,100 --> 00:48:08,100
He's here somewhere.
741
00:48:08,150 --> 00:48:10,069
What happened
to your white hunter?
742
00:48:10,070 --> 00:48:14,870
Dead. Shot in the head
during a safari - too sad.
743
00:48:15,700 --> 00:48:17,749
Oh, well, at least
you didn't have to bolt.
744
00:48:19,410 --> 00:48:22,379
Yeah, no. Yes, for once!
745
00:48:22,380 --> 00:48:26,189
First one I lost respectably -
to death.
746
00:48:26,190 --> 00:48:29,690
Oh, Fanny, dear,
you're very funny.
747
00:48:31,510 --> 00:48:36,910
I'm going to go and fetch
lovely Colin for you to meet.
748
00:48:41,750 --> 00:48:45,589
? D'ye ken John Peel
with his coat so gay?
749
00:48:45,590 --> 00:48:49,299
? D'ye ken John Peel
at the break o' the day
750
00:48:49,300 --> 00:48:51,859
? D'ye ken John Peel
when he's far, far away... ?
751
00:48:51,860 --> 00:48:54,929
Oh, darling Colin,
everything about you is heaven.
752
00:48:54,930 --> 00:48:56,849
I just want to spend
the whole night with you!
753
00:48:56,850 --> 00:48:58,189
Goodness, let's!
754
00:48:58,190 --> 00:48:59,989
? For the sound of his horn... ?
755
00:48:59,990 --> 00:49:01,389
Come, let's get out of here.
756
00:49:01,390 --> 00:49:04,659
? And the cry of his hounds
which he oft times led
757
00:49:04,660 --> 00:49:08,109
? Peel's "View, Halloo!"
could awaken the dead
758
00:49:08,110 --> 00:49:12,059
? Or the fox from his lair
in the morning
759
00:49:12,060 --> 00:49:15,560
? Yes, I ken John Peel
and Ruby too
760
00:49:15,790 --> 00:49:19,059
? Ranter and Royal
and Bellman so true
761
00:49:19,060 --> 00:49:21,109
? From the drag to the chase
762
00:49:21,110 --> 00:49:23,349
? From the chase to the view
763
00:49:23,350 --> 00:49:27,650
? From a view to the death
in the morning. ?
764
00:49:36,850 --> 00:49:40,350
"Darling, I'm your mummy."
765
00:49:46,710 --> 00:49:50,410
"Darling, I'm your mummy."
766
00:50:00,150 --> 00:50:03,789
That bloody Hun
Kroesig has just telephoned.
767
00:50:03,790 --> 00:50:06,349
He wanted to speak to you, Linda.
768
00:50:06,350 --> 00:50:08,149
I told him to get
the hell out of here -
769
00:50:08,150 --> 00:50:10,069
I don't want you mixed up
with any Germans,
770
00:50:10,070 --> 00:50:11,870
do you understand?
771
00:50:12,780 --> 00:50:14,980
Well, I am "mixed up".
772
00:50:16,980 --> 00:50:19,029
As it happens,
I'm engaged to him.
773
00:50:26,130 --> 00:50:28,139
What did you...? Come here!
774
00:50:28,140 --> 00:50:30,059
What did you...?
Come here, you!
775
00:50:30,060 --> 00:50:31,260
Come here!
776
00:50:33,430 --> 00:50:34,859
What did you say?
777
00:50:34,860 --> 00:50:37,960
How dare you! What did you say?
778
00:50:39,540 --> 00:50:42,189
What are you doing?
She just said she's engaged!
779
00:51:01,270 --> 00:51:05,429
It wasn't just Uncle Matthew
who opposed the engagement.
780
00:51:05,430 --> 00:51:09,539
Tony is Bottom
to Linda's Titania, isn't he?
781
00:51:09,540 --> 00:51:11,249
He's ghastly.
782
00:51:11,250 --> 00:51:13,429
A frightful Counter Hon.
783
00:51:13,430 --> 00:51:15,669
Nothing will wake her up.
784
00:51:15,670 --> 00:51:18,549
No. Not before it's too late.
785
00:51:18,550 --> 00:51:19,870
Poor Linda.
786
00:51:21,300 --> 00:51:23,819
She has an intensely
romantic character,
787
00:51:23,820 --> 00:51:26,520
which is fatal for a woman.
788
00:51:26,870 --> 00:51:30,899
And also what makes her
so completely irresistible.
789
00:51:30,900 --> 00:51:33,779
Fortunately, most women
are madly matter-of-fact.
790
00:51:33,780 --> 00:51:37,869
Otherwise, the world
could hardly carry on.
791
00:51:37,870 --> 00:51:39,570
What am I, Davey?
792
00:51:42,030 --> 00:51:43,830
You're you, Fanny.
793
00:51:45,300 --> 00:51:47,300
You'll be all right.
794
00:51:47,990 --> 00:51:48,990
Hm.
795
00:51:50,820 --> 00:51:52,999
Lord Merlin was braver
than the rest of us.
796
00:51:53,000 --> 00:51:54,787
Are you pleased
about my engagement?
797
00:51:54,788 --> 00:51:56,921
No, of course not.
Why are you doing it?
798
00:51:58,350 --> 00:51:59,949
We're in love.
799
00:51:59,950 --> 00:52:01,429
And what makes you think so?
800
00:52:01,430 --> 00:52:04,499
One doesn't think,
one knows.
801
00:52:04,500 --> 00:52:06,200
Oh, fiddlesticks!
802
00:52:11,150 --> 00:52:12,150
Well!
803
00:52:12,950 --> 00:52:16,789
You evidently don't
understand a thing about love.
804
00:52:16,790 --> 00:52:19,789
So what's the use
in talking to you?
805
00:52:19,790 --> 00:52:23,509
Love is for grown-ups,
as you'll discover one day.
806
00:52:23,510 --> 00:52:24,659
You'll also discover
807
00:52:24,660 --> 00:52:26,389
that it's got nothing to do
with marriage.
808
00:52:26,390 --> 00:52:29,099
I'm all in favour
of you marrying, if you so wish,
809
00:52:29,100 --> 00:52:33,899
but for God's sake, not to a bore
like Tony Kroesig!
810
00:52:33,900 --> 00:52:35,539
He's your friend.
811
00:52:35,540 --> 00:52:37,780
If he's such a bore, why would
you bring him to my party?
812
00:52:37,781 --> 00:52:39,949
I can't guess that you'll go
and marry every stopgap
813
00:52:39,950 --> 00:52:42,829
that comes to stay at my house!
814
00:52:54,420 --> 00:52:57,779
Can't think why Merlin
says he's such a bore.
815
00:52:57,780 --> 00:52:59,980
Tony knows everything.
816
00:53:01,140 --> 00:53:04,149
Well, yes, that's exactly
it, he does.
817
00:53:04,150 --> 00:53:06,850
At least he thinks he does.
818
00:53:19,190 --> 00:53:20,469
Oh, bother Merlin.
819
00:53:20,470 --> 00:53:22,019
You know, I'm starting to think
820
00:53:22,020 --> 00:53:24,499
that Fa was right about
him all along.
821
00:53:24,500 --> 00:53:26,900
He is a little depraved.
822
00:53:29,940 --> 00:53:31,620
Don't you think?
823
00:53:44,700 --> 00:53:49,649
I'm afraid I have to make Lavender
Davis chief bridesmaid.
824
00:53:49,650 --> 00:53:51,750
But you'll be second.
825
00:53:52,530 --> 00:53:54,530
She's Tony's cousin.
826
00:53:55,150 --> 00:53:58,499
And she is responsible for us
getting together, after all.
827
00:53:58,500 --> 00:54:00,659
Well, only most unwittingly.
828
00:54:00,660 --> 00:54:05,160
Unwittingly or wittingly,
what does it matter?
829
00:54:27,990 --> 00:54:28,990
Um...
830
00:54:30,060 --> 00:54:31,739
Would you take my flowers
for me?
831
00:54:31,740 --> 00:54:35,440
Take my flowers for me,
would you? Oh!
832
00:54:37,200 --> 00:54:39,659
- Oh, hello, Fanny, darling.
- Come and have a champagne!
833
00:54:39,660 --> 00:54:40,859
Oh, I'm so sorry!
834
00:54:40,860 --> 00:54:45,060
- Excuse me. Sorry.
- No, I'm sorry. Excuse me.
835
00:54:48,980 --> 00:54:50,219
- This...
- There you are.
836
00:54:50,220 --> 00:54:53,820
- Yes, thank you.
- That's all right.I...
837
00:54:54,060 --> 00:54:56,699
Are you one of those
bright young things?
838
00:54:56,700 --> 00:54:58,899
Oh, I don't know.
Would you like me to be?
839
00:54:58,900 --> 00:55:00,600
Not particularly.
840
00:55:02,990 --> 00:55:04,670
- So, uh...
- Fanny!
841
00:55:05,230 --> 00:55:06,899
- Yes?
- Let's talk about...
842
00:55:06,900 --> 00:55:08,879
It's time,
everyone's sitting down.
843
00:55:10,100 --> 00:55:12,419
Yes, can we just, um, chat, Fanny?
844
00:55:12,420 --> 00:55:14,769
Well, we will later - you have
to say hello to everyone.
845
00:55:18,550 --> 00:55:19,550
Come on!
846
00:55:22,070 --> 00:55:23,070
Get in!
847
00:55:27,600 --> 00:55:30,030
Well... What do you think?
848
00:55:30,032 --> 00:55:31,651
It's better than Louisa's,
isn't it?
849
00:55:31,671 --> 00:55:32,901
There's that at least.
850
00:55:32,902 --> 00:55:34,521
I say, has anyone seen Linda?
851
00:55:34,522 --> 00:55:37,373
- Shh, shh, shh!
- I need to start my speech.
852
00:55:37,560 --> 00:55:40,244
Darling, you'd better
get out and be the bride.
853
00:55:40,245 --> 00:55:41,388
I know, I know.
854
00:55:41,390 --> 00:55:43,379
Can we just stay
for a second longer
855
00:55:43,380 --> 00:55:45,869
and just... chat and catch up?
856
00:55:45,870 --> 00:55:47,469
Your train's poking out -
857
00:55:47,470 --> 00:55:49,824
it's going to be quite
obvious you're in here.
858
00:55:49,825 --> 00:55:50,609
Darling,
859
00:55:50,610 --> 00:55:54,510
in my bitter determination
to grow up...
860
00:55:55,150 --> 00:55:58,259
...I'd forgotten we'd have
to stop being children.
861
00:55:58,260 --> 00:55:59,509
Yes, there is that.
862
00:55:59,510 --> 00:56:02,099
Can we still be toothless
old maids together?
863
00:56:02,100 --> 00:56:03,899
Not really -
you just got married!
864
00:56:06,550 --> 00:56:09,619
Oh, dear. I'm feeling a bit lost.
865
00:56:09,620 --> 00:56:10,620
Oh.
866
00:56:10,860 --> 00:56:13,269
Are there really
to be no more Christmases
867
00:56:13,270 --> 00:56:14,669
at Alconleigh?
868
00:56:14,670 --> 00:56:16,370
Linda!
869
00:56:21,710 --> 00:56:24,210
Get out of there at once!
870
00:56:25,300 --> 00:56:28,500
Tony's about to make his speech.
871
00:57:07,150 --> 00:57:10,750
Ah, there she is.
Speak of the devil.
872
00:57:13,230 --> 00:57:14,579
Come on, girl, get over here.
873
00:57:14,580 --> 00:57:16,380
? My baby loves me
874
00:57:16,860 --> 00:57:18,479
? I'm so happy
875
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:21,480
? Happy makes me a modern girl
876
00:57:21,940 --> 00:57:23,620
? Took my money
877
00:57:24,180 --> 00:57:27,629
? And bought a TV... ?
Go on.
878
00:57:27,630 --> 00:57:29,730
I love you.
879
00:57:30,710 --> 00:57:33,410
Er, when I first met Linda,
880
00:57:33,910 --> 00:57:37,019
she told me she was
an Honourable,
881
00:57:37,020 --> 00:57:38,769
the daughter of a baron,
882
00:57:38,770 --> 00:57:40,970
spoke fluent French...
883
00:57:44,700 --> 00:57:48,500
...and rode to hounds
with the Bicester.
884
00:57:53,110 --> 00:57:55,029
And I knew, right off the bat,
885
00:57:55,030 --> 00:57:56,819
she was hellbent on marrying me.
886
00:57:58,990 --> 00:58:01,429
Despite all that, I still
managed to fall for her!
887
00:58:03,220 --> 00:58:05,589
Erm, you see, I think what...
888
00:58:05,590 --> 00:58:09,299
...what sealed the deal,
as we say in banking...
889
00:58:11,990 --> 00:58:13,670
? I'm so happy
890
00:58:13,910 --> 00:58:15,590
? Happy makes me
891
00:58:15,630 --> 00:58:17,310
? A modern girl
892
00:58:17,360 --> 00:58:19,040
? Took my money
893
00:58:19,150 --> 00:58:21,450
? And bought a doughnut
894
00:58:21,660 --> 00:58:24,719
? The hole's the size of
this entire world
895
00:58:24,720 --> 00:58:26,400
? My whole life
896
00:58:28,750 --> 00:58:32,149
? Was like a picture
of a sunny day
897
00:58:32,150 --> 00:58:33,830
? My whole life
898
00:58:36,060 --> 00:58:39,960
? Looked like the picture
of a sunny day
899
00:58:54,610 --> 00:58:56,410
? My baby loves me
900
00:58:56,590 --> 00:58:58,270
? I'm so angry
901
00:58:58,620 --> 00:59:01,620
? Anger makes me a modern girl
902
00:59:01,980 --> 00:59:03,660
? Took my money
903
00:59:03,900 --> 00:59:06,069
? I couldn't buy nothin'
904
00:59:06,070 --> 00:59:09,470
? I'm sick of this brave new world
905
00:59:09,590 --> 00:59:11,270
? My whole life
906
00:59:13,260 --> 00:59:16,749
? Was like the picture
of a sunny day
907
00:59:16,750 --> 00:59:18,430
? My whole life
908
00:59:20,590 --> 00:59:24,790
? Looked like the picture
of a sunny day. ?
909
00:59:24,840 --> 00:59:29,390
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