Original subtitles

♪ Kick, Kick, Kick, Kick, Kick

♪ Kick Buttowski, Buttowski

♪ Kick

♪ Kick

♪ Kick Buttowski

♪ Kick, Kick, Kick

♪ Kick Buttowski

♪ Kick, Kick, Kick, Kick

♪ Kick

♪ Kick

♪ Kick Buttowski

♪ Kick Buttowski! ♪

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Psst. You ready, Gunther?

You mean for your non-stop trip to Skidzeez without touching the ground?

Wait! Are you sure that's even possible?

Has to be. They already made the congratulations banner.

All right, Gunther. Let's do this.

Whoa!

(GRUNTS)

Well, that was fun. Wanna play hot potato?

Ooh! Ooh! Hot! Hot!

No, Gunther. I'm not stopping till I get to Skidzeez without touching the ground.

And then we'll play hot potato.

Yay!

Let's try this again.

What the...

(SCREAMS)

(SCREAMS)

Huh. I always keep those bolts tightened.

(EXCLAIMS)

I always keep that chain greased.

Moving sheds?

What the... I never crash like this!

It's like I'm failing in every direction!

Well, that was fun. Wanna play hot hot wings?

Ooh! Ooh! Hot! Hot!

KICK: This doesn't make any sense.

I'm crashing in ways I don't normally crash. But why?

(GIRL LAUGHING)

Uh, Kick?

Not now, Gunther. I'm thinking.

(ALL LAUGHING)

GUNTHER: Uh...

Kick, you really should look!

Kick? Kick, just look already!

Gunther, please!

Between your talking and all these people laughing at my...

Crashes?

Someone's been filming my beefs! But who?

(LAUGHING)

You've been Brad'd!

(GROWLING)

Okay, the dillweed is about to do another lame stunt.

Let's see what happens when we loosen his tires!

When we de-grease his bike chain!

When we take nails out of the fence!

You've been Brad'd! You've been Brad'd! You've been Brad'd!

So Brad's why I haven't made it to Skidzeez!

Gunther, we've got to stop Brad from...

You've been Brad'd!

(LAUGHING)

All right, Brad. Show's over.

I'm an Internet sensation.

Why are you just "Bradding" me?

'Cause there's nobody easier to "Brad" than a dillweed!

Look at all these viewer comments!

So many virtual babes.

Now the ladies are gonna run to the Brad, instead of away!

Plus these Brad'd T-shirts are selling like hotcakes!

Ooh! Ooh! Hot! Hot!

(BRAD LAUGHING)

You can't keep me from getting to Skidzeez forever, Brad.

(BRAD LAUGHING)

KICK: Come on, Gunther.

GUNTHER: Needs syrup.

Yeah, bonus features!

You've been Brad'd!

(BOTH LAUGHING)

You've been Brad'd!

(ALL LAUGHING)

BRAD DOLL: You've been Brad'd!

Hey, hot babes! My number is...

I don't believe this!

Brad's built an empire around my failures!

But I'm not gonna let that stop me from getting to Skidzeez.

Relax, Kick. I've got the perfect revenge.

(BUZZES)

Eh? Eh? Eh? Eh?

We gotta think bigger.

I won't be a prisoner in my own house.

I'm gonna get to Skidzeez!

You think he's gonna do that pie thing again?

Not this time, Brad.

(GRUNTING)

(SCOFFS) Amateur!

(KICK PANTING)

(YELLS)

(ALL LAUGHING)

(BUZZING)

(SCREAMING)

BRAD: You've been Brad'd!

Double-Brad'd!

Huh?

Ooh! Ooh! Hot!

Brad'd trifecta!

BRAD: You've been Brad'd! You've been Brad'd! (PEOPLE LAUGHING)

(ECHOING) You've been Brad'd!

No more Bradding!

BRAD: (DISTORTED) You've been Brad'd.

(DISTORTED LAUGHTER)

(PANTING)

(EXCLAIMS)

(BANGING ON DOOR)

I told you, Brad! No more Br...

About to be Brad'd!

You've been Brad'd!

(TEETH CHATTERING)

Kick, are you in here?

Brad'd!

(GASPS) Kick, you flinched.

I've never seen you flinch before.

Look what I've become! I've lost my focus.

The map. I said I was going to Skidzeez without touching the ground.

Gunther, you're right. I gotta snap out of it.

I didn't say anything about snapping out.

Kick Buttowski does not put up barricades.

He breaks them down!

I didn't say that, either.

Sorry, Kick. But this is a cotton-poly blend.

It moves when you move.

Fine, I'll wear it inside-out.

I'm gonna take this map, and I'm gonna get to Skidzeez by 3:00.

And I'll be one step ahead of you!

I've got cameras set up everywhere to broadcast your fails live!

You never give up and I'm gonna use that against you.

I'm counting on it.

Let's try this again.

You've been... Hey!

(ALL EXCLAIM)

(ALL GASP)

He's not getting Brad'd!

(GROWLS IN FRUSTRATION)

He's using my Bradding against me.

My empire will crumble if he makes it to Skidzeez un-Brad'd.

(PEOPLE CHEERING)

(SCREAMS)

MAN 1: He's almost to Skidzeez!

MAN 2: He's awesome! MAN 3: Way better than Brad is.

Gotta stop Kick!

Horace! Pantsy! Prepare the blockade!

Let's see you scale this, dillweed!

Biscuits. Now it's really impossible.

Scientifically unfeasible.

(LAUGHS)

Huh? (SCREAMS)

(CROWD CHEERING)

(GRUNTING)

(SCREAMS)

Smacked with my own foam finger! Ouch!

Why did I license Brad'd bowling balls?

All right, Brad. No more Bradding.

Okay.

And no more pranks.

Okay.

Shake on it.

Okay.

(BUZZING) (SCREAMS)

Works every time.

Brad, you've been Kick'd.

MALE TV ANNOUNCER: You may know him as Rodney "Rock" Callahan,

but the Ancient Greeks knew him as Perseus.

Perseus in Pittsburgh.

(HONKING)

Action.

Fighting.

(WHINNIES)

And none of that mushy stuff.

(BELL RINGING)

Looks like romance is all wet. Let's boogie!

Guess he was still working on his catch phrase.

MALE TV ANNOUNCER: It's Perseus In Pittsburgh.

Starring three-time winner of the Mega-Muscle Man Competition,

Rodney "Rock" Callahan!

(ALARM RINGING)

Try to catch it! Tonight?

That's right, Gunther. Tonight at 2:00 a.m.

Rock Callahan in his very first movie on the Insomniac Movie Channel.

BOTH: Perseus in Pittsburgh!

It's the only Rock Callahan movie I've never seen!

Me, either! It's not available on VHS, DVD,

or our neighbors' premium channels!

They get everything!

Ooh, the Gunther Channel! This is awesome!

You should see this!

In this episode, Gunther's using binoculars to...

Oh.

So, tonight, my house, sleepover.

I'll pack!

My fifth sleepover this week! A new personal best!

This is gonna be great. Just you and me and...

Brianna? What are you doing here?

This room is mine, Kick.

I'm hosting my very first slumber party!

Yay! Slumber party!

(GIGGLES) Oh! I didn't know you were inviting boys!

We're staying up to watch the Teena Sometimes marathon.

Yay! Teena Sometimes!

Sometimes a princess.

Sometimes a spy!

Always annoying.

Gunther and I were gonna watch Perseus in Pittsburgh tonight.

Oh, no! I booked this room weeks ago.

I'm afraid she's right, Kick.

The living room's hers until 8:00 a.m.

Oh, tomorrow at 2:00 Brad is scheduled to throw a pie in your face.

Brianna, come on! We're missing the show!

Teena's about to dance with the prince and steal his flash drive!

You've already seen this one?

Only 138 times.

(GIRLS SIGHING)

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a Teena Sometimes marathon to watch again.

Fine.

Let's just watch the movie at my house.

No way, Gunther.

I'm not gonna let a bunch of girls stop us from watching that movie.

What're you gonna do?

I just grab that remote control and the living room is ours.

I don't know about this, Kick.

It's just Brianna. What could happen?

But...

BRIANNA: Hee-ya! (KICK SCREAMING)

So, my house?

Dad! Mom! Do you need the TV tonight?

Oh, not tonight. Tonight is Wolf Hair Moon!

Kick, we gotta get out of here.

Relax, Gunther. They said they don't need the TV.

I'm telling you, we gotta get...

(YELLS)

(BOTH SPUTTERING)

Well, it's obvious what we have to do.

Get good educations, land high-paying jobs...

(GAGGING)

...earn enough money to buy a TV...

Gunther, there's no time! That Rock Callahan movie will be on before we know it!

Then what'll we do? What'll we do?

We have no choice. We're gonna have to watch the movie at my house.

But what about Brianna and her two evil henchmen?

There's got to be some way to get them away from that TV.

We gotta infiltrate their coven and sweet talk some intel out of them.

Kick, no. This is madness, I tells ya!

MALE TV ANNOUNCER: We'll be right back with more Teena Sometimes.

Okay, commercial. You're on.

I don't know about this, Kick.

Remember, you're Gunther Magnuson,

sometimes a wingman, sometimes a spy.

Just moments away from seeing the hottest...

(GASPS) What have they done to you?

They gave me a makeover. Turns out I'm an autumn.

And all this time I thought I was a spring.

What did you find out? Anything we can use to drive them out of there?

(SNIFFING)

Well, they don't like things that stink.

Stink, huh?

This is gonna be sweet.

(GIRLS EXCLAIM)

(BOTH CHEER)

Well, hello! Aren't you going to introduce me, Kick?

We're both autumns! (CHUCKLES)

(GRUNTING)

Time's running out. If we can't drive them out, we'll tire them out.

You think there's time for that?

They're just little girls, how hard can it be?

KICK: Hey, girls.

Hold it right there! You're not changing the channel!

Whoa! I just want to see how your very first slumber party's going.

Uh, oh, yeah, what games have you played?

Games?

You mean, you're having a slumber party without any games?

I love games! Yay!

How about Spin The Bottle?

Kick!

Gunther and I might be willing to show you

some of the top-rated slumber party games.

What do you know about slumber parties?

We're experts.

We've been to more slumber parties than... Than...

Than there are episodes of Teena Sometimes!

BOTH: Ooh!

No! Please, Brianna?

It'll be just like the episode where Teena was stuck on

Board Game Island! ...Board Game Island!

All right. We'll play your games.

But the Teena Sometimes marathon stays on!

BOTH: Yay!

I've got my partner. (CRUNCHING)

Okay. When I say "go," race around the room.

Wait a minute. Where's Abbie?

Ready when you are, partner!

I think you're supposed to have your own sleeping bag.

Go!

(LAUGHING) (GRUNTS)

Don't worry. You broke my fall.

I know. And so does my spleen.

Gunther are you... (GRUNTING)

(MADISON GIGGLING)

What would a slumber party be without a pillow fight?

Yay! Pillow fight!

Remember, Gunther, they're just little girls, so be gentle.

Naturally.

(GRUNTING)

Okay, let's hurry up and get the next game going.

I've got a game!

(GASPS)

(KISSING)

This is fun! What's next?

I know! Chicken fight! Yay!

ABBIE: Good idea!

(LAUGHING)

I love you.

GIRLS: More games! More games! Yay!

Do you think we're tiring them out?

Definitely. I think I saw one of them yawn.

But we've got to step up the pace.

It's almost time for our movie.

(GIRLS LAUGHING)

Who wants to play tag?

ALL: We do!

Who's gonna be it? I am!

Oh! Ready, set, go!

(GIRLS GIGGLING)

(KISSING)

(ALL PANTING)

MALE TV ANNOUNCER: And now, let's continue

with back-to-back-to-back episodes of Teena Sometimes!

Must watch whole marathon.

(SNORING)

MALE TV ANNOUNCER: Insomniac Theater presents

Rock Callahan in Perseus in Pittsburgh!

Just in time!

BOTH: We did it!

(BOTH SIGH)

Who turned on the sun? Morning?

Oh, no! We missed the movie!

Good morning, big brother!

What's good about it?

Oh, I dunno. Maybe this?

What's this?

Perseus in Pittsburgh.

You made my slumber party really fun, so I recorded it for you.

You recorded it in your sleep?

Who could sleep?

(KICK AND GUNTHER SNORING)

Thanks, Bri.

What are you gonna do with those wings on your feet?

Fly away? (LAUGHS)

No. But you are.

Have a nice flight.

You know, I think this is some of Rock Callahan's finest work.

Agreed.

(POLICE SIREN BLARING ON TV)

Well, Brad did schedule it for 2:00.

You gonna eat that?