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[ DISCLAIMER ]
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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
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>> Tosh: THE INTERNET.
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I'VE MISSED YOU.
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WELCOME BACK TO "TOSH.0."
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SUMMER VACATION IS OVER AND A
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WISH I COULD HAVE KEPT YOU
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WAITING LONGER.
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I'M NOT RELAXED OR RESTED AT
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ALL.
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PAY CAREFUL ATTENTION TO WHAT
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I'M WEARING RIGHT NOW BECAUSE
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THIS IS THE SEASON OF SUBTLE
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DIFFERENCES.
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[CHEERING]
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>> Tosh: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
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EACH WEEK SMALL BUT SIGNIFICANT
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CHANGES WILL BE MADE TO THIS
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EXACT LOOK AND IF YOU SPOT THE
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DIFFERENCE THAT WILL BE VERY FUN
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FOR YOU.
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TONIGHT ON THE SHOW, I MAKE THIS
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KID'S FURRY FANTASIES COME
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THROUGH AND MEET THE LORD OF THE
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PRANCE AND GARGLE WITH RICH,
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CREAMY WHITE LIQUID IN MY MOUTH
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AND NOW CHECK IN WITH KAT
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DENNING AS SHE PREPARES FOR LIFE
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AFTER TWO BROKE GIRLS.
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ACT MATURE.
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THIS IS ART.
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THOSE BOOBS ALL RIGHT GOT
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GRABBED BY GRAVITY.
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THAT'S MY SIZE OF AN AREOLA.
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YOU KNOW RESTAURANT IMPOSSIBLE'S
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GOING HAVE A FIELD DAY WITH THIS
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PLACE.
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HAVE YOU BEEN SLAPPING MY STEAK
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WITH YOUR TITTY, MA'AM?
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THE HEALTH RATING MUST BE AT
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LEAST A D.
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THE ONLY POSITIVE THING THAT
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CAME FROM THIS OBJECTIFYING
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PIECE OF TRASH IS THAT IT
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INSPIRED KNOW CREATE SOME REAL
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PERFORMANCE ART.
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[LAUGHTER]
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>> Tosh: MINE IS IN NO WAY
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OFFENSIVE BECAUSE I'M USING A
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VEGGIE PATTY.
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MEAT IS MURDER.
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OKAY.
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HERE'S WHY YOU ALWAYS KEEP YOUR
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HANDS AT 10 AND 2.
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IT WAS EITHER THIS OR TURN THE
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STEERING WHEEL.
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NOW POP IT IN REVERSE AND YOU
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CAN FIX THAT RIGHT UP.
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HEY, BUD, YOU'RE NOT IN A BOAT.
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YEP.
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JUST GOING TO GO AHEAD AND
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LIGHTLY PUSH THAT TREE OUT OF
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THE WAY.
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IT'S BEEN GROWING IN THE GROUND
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FOR OVER 100 YEARS.
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ALL RIGHT, WHO'S READY TO GET A
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BONER?
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>> THE ONE ON THE LEFT.
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NO, THE ONE ON THE RIGHT.
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THIS IS SO HARD.
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WHY ARE THEY OUT OF BREATH?
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YOU'D BE GASSED TOO IF YOU SPENT
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ALL DAY MAKING PEOPLE HORNY.
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REMEMBER, THIS CAN'T BE GAY
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BECAUSE THEY'RE BROTHERS.
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SWEET BUILT-IN, BROSEFS.
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SORRY.
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IT JUST REMINDS ME OF WHEN I
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USED TO FLEX WITH MY KID
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BROTHER.
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THAT'S RIGHT, I HAD A CONJOINED
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TWIN BROTHER BUT WE PARTED WAYS
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BACK IN 2006 WHEN HE DECIDED HE
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WANTED TO PURSUE IS A CAREER IN
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CLEAN COMEDY.
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STARTING TO THINK THE PARENTS
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THAT KEEP THEIR KIDS ON LEASHES
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IN PUBLIC ARE THE SMART ONES.
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MAKE HER THE NEW BATMAN.
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>> HEY.
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>> Tosh: HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
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YOUR MOM'S A [BLEEP].
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LUCKY THAT KID'S STEPDAD IS NO
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LONGER IN THE PICTURE.
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THIS IS THE DOS EQUIS CUTTER.
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YOU GET PAID TO RUN AROUND WITH
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THE OTHER INTERESTING MEN OF THE
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WORLD.
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PEOPLE WILL DO ANYTHING FOR 30
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LIKES ON FACEBOOK.
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AN ASIAN BEING HUNG AND
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ELECTROCUTED AND NOT JERKING
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OFF?
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THAT'S THE FIRST FOR THIS SHOW.
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STAY UNATHLETIC MY FRIEND.
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WHAT'S NEXT?
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NOBODY PUTS THE FUN IN FUNERAL
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LIKE BLACK PEOPLE.
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NOW, LET'S WATCH THE LORD WORK
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IN FABULOUS WAYS IN THIS WEEK'S
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BREAKDOWN.
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[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
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>> Tosh: I'VE SAID IT 100 TIMES.
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THE MOST RESPECTFUL WAY TO HONOR
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THE DECEASED IS WITH A DANCE
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EULOGY.
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THEY'RE EVEN RHYTHMIC WHEN THEY
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MOURN.
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN "THEY"?
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WHY'S IT ALWAYS SO HOT IN THESE
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CHURCHES.
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HOW ABOUT A CLAP FOR AC?
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AMEN.
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I'LL CARTWHEEL THROUGH THE
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SHADOW OF THE VALLEY OF DEATH.
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THANK GOD THERE'S NO CASKET.
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HE'D USE IT LIKE A PUMMEL HORSE.
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TIME TO PUT THE NAIL IN THE
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COFFIN.
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CAN I GET AN OH [BLEEP].
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IS IT TOO LATE TO CUT HIM OUT OF
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THE WILL?
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HE NEVER GOT TO KICK HER IN THE
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FIS WHILE SHE WAS ALIVE.
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IS THIS A TRIBUTE OR REENACTMENT
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OF HER ACCIDENT?
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FORGET ABOUT THE PICTURE,
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NOBODY'S GOING TO REMEMBER HER
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AFTER THIS MAGNIFICENT
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PERFORMANCE UNLIKE HER LIFE THE
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SHOW MUST GO ON.
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ASHY TO ASHY, KLUTZ TO KLUTZ AND
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FOR NA WE THANK YOU.
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WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK TO HELP THIS
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UNDERAGE FURRY GET HIS FREAK ON
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BUT FIRST OPEN WIDE.
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HERE'S YOUR DICK OF THE WEEK.
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[ SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE ]
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>> I'M NOT GOING TO SIT BY ANY
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MORE AND LISTEN TO THIS STUFF
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ABOUT FURRIES SAYING THEY HAVE
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SEX IN FUR SUITS AND ALL THIS
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BOGUS CRAP.
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HOW MUCH YOU WANT TO BET THE
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PEOPLE THAT EVEN PUT THIS CRAP
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OUT HAVEN'T EVEN TALKED TO A
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FURRY.
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THEY DON'T KNOW REALLY WHAT A
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FURRY IS AND OH, ONE THING THAT
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REALLY TORQUES ME OFF, SAYING
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HELL FOR A FURRY.
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WHAT'S THE HECK?
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I JUST DON'T KNOW.
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I DON'T KNOW ABOUT ALL THE
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HATERS.
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I'M A FURRY.
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YOU KNOW WHAT, BRING ON THE HATE
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COMMENTS.
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WHITE FUR, ARCTIC FOX FUR.
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>> Tosh: THAT'S NOT GOING COVER
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MUCH.
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THAT'S CODY AND HE'S INTO
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FICTIONAL ANTHROPOMORPHIC ROLE
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PLAY.
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HE CALLED HIMSELF A FURRY.
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WHAT TORQUES HIM OFF ARE THE
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HATERS AND TROLLS.
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IT'S NOT JUST ABOUT THE SEX, YOU
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JERKS DON'T GET THERE'S A PURITY
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AND INNOCENCE.
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FURRIES ARE PEOPLE WHO LOVE
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ANIMALS AND FIND A LOOPHOLE IN
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THIS COUNTRY'S OVERBARING
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BESTIALITY LAWS.
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IT'S A SAD DAY WHEN A FARMER
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CAN'T POUR HIMSELF A DRINK.
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LOOK AT THOSE COME-HITHER EYES.
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LISTEN, I WANT TO BANG A THUNDER
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CAT AS MUCH AS THE NEXT GUY BUT
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I'M NOT FLYING TO PITTSBURGH
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DRESSED LIKE SONIC THE HEDGEHOG
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TO DO IT AND GOOD LUCK FINDING A
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DRY CLEANER THAT KNOWS HOW TO
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GET ANAL JUICE OUT MUCH A
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NARWHAL OUTFIT.
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BY NIGHT HE WANTS TO BE KUSA THE
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ARCTIC FOX.
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IT SOUNDS LIKE A BROKEN PERSON'S
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DREAM BUT I'M A BROKEN PERSON
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TOO AND WE BROUGHT HIM TO L.A.
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WHERE WE CALL BROKEN PEOPLE
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ARMENIANS.
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>> DANIEL.
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>> HEY, CODY.
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THANKS FOR MEETING ME IN THE
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ARCTICBURY GO KILL A BUNCH OF
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ARCTIC FOXES I WANT TO ASK YOU
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SOME QUESTIONS.
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HOPEFULLY THE STORM WILL DIE
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DOWN.
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LOOKS LIKE WE GOT A BREAK IN THE
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STORM.
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THAT WAS CONVENIENT.
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HOW LONG AGO WAS THE VIDEO?
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>> ABOUT FOUR YEARS AGO.
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>> Tosh: WHAT YOU LOOK BACK WHAT
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DO YOU THINK?
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>> OH, MY GOD, I WAS A STUPID
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KID.
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>> I'M TIRED OF THIS CRAP BE
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SPEWED.
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>> Tosh: YOU WERE UPSET BECAUSE
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A LOT OF PEOPLE ASSUME -- I'M
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ONE OF THEM, THAT IT'S JUST GOOD
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THE SEX.
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>> WHO ISN'T A WEIRDO BUT IT
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ISN'T ALL SEX.
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I'VE MET A LOT OF GREAT PEOPLE
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THAT HAVE BECOME A FEW OF MY
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BEST FRIENDS.
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>>
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>> ONLINE THOUGH?
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>> YEAH.
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>> Tosh: DID YOU HAVE PETS?
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>> ONE CAT.
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>> Tosh: ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO
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IT?
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>> YES, I WANT TO -- NO.
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>> Tosh: WHAT'S THE MASCOT?
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>> IT'S A LYNX.
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>>
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>> ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO IT?
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>> NO.
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ONE THING THAT TORQUES ME OFF IS
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SAYING HELL AND HECK.
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WHAT THE HECK.
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>> Tosh: WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?
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>> IT'S THE SEXUAL TERM.
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>> Tosh: TO MAKE LOVE?
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>> PRETTY MUCH.
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ON THE TYRA BANKS SHOW --
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>> Tosh: TYRA BANKS IS A FURRY?
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>> NO, IT WAS AN EPISODE OF THE
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WEIRDEST SEX IS FETISH.
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>> Tosh: I THINK THE WEIRDEST
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FETISH WORK INTO TYRA BANKS.
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THAT'S QUITE A FOREHEAD.
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>> THERE'S A 1,000 WAYS TO DIE
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ON SPIKE TV --
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>> Tosh: WHY ARE YOU WATCHING SO
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MUCH SPIKE TV?
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ASK ME TO NAME ONE SHOW.
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>> ALL RIGHT --
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>> Tosh: CAN'T.
265
00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:56,570
YOU WATCH A LOT OF AWFUL
266
00:10:56,567 --> 00:10:57,197
TELEVISION.
267
00:10:57,200 --> 00:10:58,100
>> I WATCH YOUR SHOW.
268
00:10:58,100 --> 00:10:59,470
>> Tosh: CASE IN POINT.
269
00:10:59,467 --> 00:11:01,327
WHO WAS THE OLD GUY SITTING
270
00:11:01,333 --> 00:11:02,603
BEHIND YOU IN THE VIDEO?
271
00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,230
>> THAT WAS ACTUALLY MY
272
00:11:05,233 --> 00:11:05,903
GRANDFATHER.
273
00:11:05,900 --> 00:11:06,700
>> Tosh: THAT'S MY FAVORITE PART
274
00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,930
OF THE VIDEO IS WHEN YOU GOT UP
275
00:11:08,933 --> 00:11:11,703
TO SHOW YOUR FUR YOU SEE GRANDPA
276
00:11:11,700 --> 00:11:12,930
BACK THERE PETTING A CAT.
277
00:11:12,933 --> 00:11:14,403
I THOUGHT THIS GUY CAME FROM A
278
00:11:14,400 --> 00:11:17,330
LINE OF FURRIES.
279
00:11:17,333 --> 00:11:20,973
WHAT IS FURSONNA.
280
00:11:20,967 --> 00:11:22,797
>> THE PERSONA.
281
00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:25,170
YOU PUT FURRY IN FRONT OF WORDS?
282
00:11:25,167 --> 00:11:27,597
>> YOU DID IT.
283
00:11:27,600 --> 00:11:30,570
>> Tosh: IS USING THE WORD FUR A
284
00:11:30,567 --> 00:11:33,767
FUR PASS PAU X.
285
00:11:33,767 --> 00:11:38,867
>> I THINK MOST FURRIES ARE
286
00:11:38,867 --> 00:11:39,467
PHILANTHROPISTS.
287
00:11:39,467 --> 00:11:41,067
>> Tosh: HAVE YOU FALLEN ASLEEP
288
00:11:41,067 --> 00:11:42,867
IN A COSTUME?
289
00:11:42,867 --> 00:11:44,367
>> I'VE NEVER BEEN IN A COSTUME.
290
00:11:44,367 --> 00:11:46,727
>> Tosh: YOU'RE NOT A FURRY.
291
00:11:46,733 --> 00:11:48,233
OKAY, THAT'S ME A VIRGIN AND YOU
292
00:11:48,233 --> 00:11:49,073
A VIRGIN?
293
00:11:49,067 --> 00:11:54,397
>> DON'T YOU MEAN FURGIN.
294
00:11:54,400 --> 00:11:57,730
>> Tosh: TONS OF CELEBRITIES ARE
295
00:11:57,733 --> 00:11:58,433
FURRIES.
296
00:11:58,433 --> 00:12:01,873
TOBY McWIRE HAS ONE OF THE BEST
297
00:12:01,867 --> 00:12:04,097
PARTIES AND I'M ON THE LIST TWO
298
00:12:04,100 --> 00:12:05,070
THURSDAYS FROM NOW.
299
00:12:05,067 --> 00:12:06,597
>> THAT'S COOL BUT IT'S NOT
300
00:12:06,600 --> 00:12:08,070
GOING TO BE A WEIRD KINKY SEX
301
00:12:08,067 --> 00:12:08,867
PARTY IS IT?
302
00:12:08,867 --> 00:12:10,567
>> Tosh: NO, NETWORKING AND
303
00:12:10,567 --> 00:12:11,767
FURRY FELLOWSHIP.
304
00:12:11,767 --> 00:12:13,527
YOU'RE GOING HAVE A BLAST.
305
00:12:13,533 --> 00:12:14,733
LOOKS LIKE THE STORM'S PICKING
306
00:12:14,733 --> 00:12:16,973
BACK UP.
307
00:12:16,967 --> 00:12:21,467
[***]
308
00:12:21,467 --> 00:12:22,367
>> Tosh: CODY?
309
00:12:22,367 --> 00:12:23,967
YOUR FUR SUIT IS AWESOME.
310
00:12:23,967 --> 00:12:25,067
HOW'S IT FEEL?
311
00:12:25,067 --> 00:12:26,297
>> I LIKE IT.
312
00:12:26,300 --> 00:12:26,670
.
313
00:12:26,667 --> 00:12:28,267
WHAT ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO BE?
314
00:12:28,267 --> 00:12:29,667
>> Tosh: NAKED ROBIN WILLIAMS.
315
00:12:29,667 --> 00:12:32,227
THE ORIGINAL FURRY AND ONE MORE
316
00:12:32,233 --> 00:12:34,833
THING THE CELEBRITIES ARE SUPER
317
00:12:34,833 --> 00:12:36,173
SECRETIVE SO YOU'LL HAVE TO WEAR
318
00:12:36,167 --> 00:12:38,067
A MASK TO CONCEAL YOUR TRUE
319
00:12:38,067 --> 00:12:38,697
IDENTITY.
320
00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:39,970
COME ON.
321
00:12:39,967 --> 00:12:41,727
WHAT'S THE PASSWORD?
322
00:12:41,733 --> 00:12:44,673
>> WE'RE HERE TO [BLEEP] A BUNCH
323
00:12:44,667 --> 00:12:46,327
OF DUDES IN COSTUMES.
324
00:12:46,333 --> 00:12:47,173
>> ALL RIGHT.
325
00:12:47,167 --> 00:12:48,467
>> Tosh: TURNS OUT I WAS WRONG.
326
00:12:48,467 --> 00:12:50,427
THERE'S A LOT OF SEX AT THIS
327
00:12:50,433 --> 00:12:51,073
PARTY.
328
00:12:51,067 --> 00:12:52,667
AMAZING PARTY, TOBY, THANKS FOR
329
00:12:52,667 --> 00:12:54,197
HAVING US OVER.
330
00:12:54,200 --> 00:12:56,430
IS THAT RUSSEL CROWE?
331
00:12:56,433 --> 00:12:58,133
THERE'S SANDY BULLOCK.
332
00:12:58,133 --> 00:13:02,733
GET YOUR FACE OUT OF PENELOPE
333
00:13:02,733 --> 00:13:04,973
CRUZ'S LAP AND COME SAY HIGH TO
334
00:13:04,967 --> 00:13:06,567
MY FRIEND.
335
00:13:06,567 --> 00:13:16,327
JON STEWART AND STEVE COLBERT.
336
00:13:16,333 --> 00:13:18,303
THAT'S FOREST WHIT KER.
337
00:13:18,300 --> 00:13:19,600
THAT'S AN HONOR TO BE WITH YOU
338
00:13:19,600 --> 00:13:23,230
AND AS I LIVE AND BREATHE.
339
00:13:23,233 --> 00:13:25,433
PHILLIP SEYMOUR HOFFMAN.
340
00:13:25,433 --> 00:13:27,503
I JUST SAW ALONG CAME POLLY.
341
00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:34,900
WONDERFUL FILM.
342
00:13:34,900 --> 00:13:38,400
>> ANOTHER ARCTIC FOX?
343
00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:41,070
I THINK I FOUND MY SOUL MATE.
344
00:13:41,067 --> 00:13:42,867
>> Tosh: WHAT ARE YOU WAITING
345
00:13:42,867 --> 00:13:43,427
FOR?
346
00:13:43,433 --> 00:13:44,333
GET GET IT ON.
347
00:13:44,333 --> 00:13:54,573
>> HI.
348
00:13:54,567 --> 00:14:01,527
[ SCREAMING ]
349
00:14:01,533 --> 00:14:03,073
>> Tosh: BOB BARKER?
350
00:14:03,067 --> 00:14:08,067
>> HELP CONTROL THE POPULATION.
351
00:14:08,067 --> 00:14:09,167
HAVE YOUR PET SPAYED OR
352
00:14:09,167 --> 00:14:16,427
NEUTERED.
353
00:14:16,433 --> 00:14:23,403
>> LATER BOB BARKER PISSED ON A
354
00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:26,530
DINETTE SET.
355
00:14:26,533 --> 00:14:29,073
NOW HERE'S SOME HUMOR.
356
00:14:29,067 --> 00:14:30,267
>> LOOK AT ME.
357
00:14:30,267 --> 00:14:34,297
LOOK AT ME IN MY MILLION DOLLAR
358
00:14:34,300 --> 00:14:34,870
[BLEEP].
359
00:14:34,867 --> 00:14:35,497
LOOK.
360
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:37,570
HEY, YOU WANT TO SEE SOMETHING
361
00:14:37,567 --> 00:14:39,897
REALLY FUNNY?
362
00:14:39,900 --> 00:14:40,770
LOOK.
363
00:14:40,767 --> 00:14:43,327
HEY, MY LICENSE IS STILL IN THE
364
00:14:43,333 --> 00:14:45,773
[BLEEP] PERMIT BECAUSE I'M 16,
365
00:14:45,767 --> 00:14:46,267
[BLEEP].
366
00:14:46,267 --> 00:14:49,067
>> WHAT'S YOUR NAME?
367
00:14:49,067 --> 00:14:52,067
>> JOHN ATTANASIO, [BLEEP].
368
00:14:52,067 --> 00:14:53,527
>> WHAT'S YOUR ADDRESS?
369
00:14:53,533 --> 00:14:55,973
>> WHAT'S MY ADDRESS YOU LITTLE
370
00:14:55,967 --> 00:14:56,367
[BLEEP]?
371
00:15:03,100 --> 00:15:04,630
>> HELLO.
372
00:15:04,633 --> 00:15:09,803
I'M HERE TODAY TO SHOW YOU THE
373
00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:11,330
DIFFERENT SIZES AND MY ANKLE
374
00:15:11,333 --> 00:15:13,603
WEIGHTS ARE IN PLACE AND THE
375
00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:15,430
MUSIC'S READY SO LET'S STOP
376
00:15:15,433 --> 00:15:33,173
TALKING AND DO SOME WALKING.
377
00:15:33,167 --> 00:15:34,297
>> Tosh: THAT'S WHY I WON'T PLAY
378
00:15:34,300 --> 00:15:37,600
GOLF ON A PUBLIC COURSE.
379
00:15:37,600 --> 00:15:40,230
THAT SWEET OLD LADY WITH A CAMEL
380
00:15:40,233 --> 00:15:42,703
TOE IS JOANNA AND SHE'S BEHIND
381
00:15:42,700 --> 00:15:48,530
THE ONLY HORSE-INSPIRED WORKOUT,
382
00:15:48,533 --> 00:15:54,933
PRANCERCISE LLC.
383
00:15:54,933 --> 00:16:03,103
>> WELL, HOWDY PRANCERCISING
384
00:16:03,100 --> 00:16:03,770
PRINCESS.
385
00:16:03,767 --> 00:16:06,227
I NEED TO GET IN SHAPE.
386
00:16:06,233 --> 00:16:08,073
>> WELL, PRANCERCISE IS THE
387
00:16:08,067 --> 00:16:08,467
ANSWER.
388
00:16:08,467 --> 00:16:09,967
THERE'S NOTHING LIKE IT.
389
00:16:09,967 --> 00:16:11,597
>> Tosh: I ONLY HAVE THREE DAYS
390
00:16:11,600 --> 00:16:13,900
SO I THINK I'LL NEED LARGER
391
00:16:13,900 --> 00:16:14,430
WEIGHTS.
392
00:16:14,433 --> 00:16:15,503
IS THAT LOVE FOR HORSES?
393
00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:19,070
>> WHAT'S NOT TO LOVE?
394
00:16:19,067 --> 00:16:20,497
STRENGTH, ENDURANCE AND
395
00:16:20,500 --> 00:16:21,100
VEGETARIAN.
396
00:16:21,100 --> 00:16:23,070
>> Tosh: WHAT'S THE BEST MUSIC
397
00:16:23,067 --> 00:16:24,797
TO PRANCERCISE TO?
398
00:16:24,800 --> 00:16:28,200
>> I LOVE MOTOWN.
399
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:32,170
GO SID TO SIDE LET'S GO.
400
00:16:32,167 --> 00:16:33,567
>> Tosh: I'M READY TO PICK UP
401
00:16:33,567 --> 00:16:34,067
THE PACE.
402
00:16:34,067 --> 00:16:35,467
>> THE NEXT IS THE TROT.
403
00:16:35,467 --> 00:16:37,067
>> Tosh: DON'T SNEAK UP ON
404
00:16:37,067 --> 00:16:38,427
SOMEONE PRANCERCISING.
405
00:16:38,433 --> 00:16:40,103
>> THE TROT IS SIMILAR TO THE
406
00:16:40,100 --> 00:16:40,600
WALK.
407
00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:41,770
>> Tosh: EVERYONE SHOULD BE
408
00:16:41,767 --> 00:16:45,697
PRANCERCISING.
409
00:16:45,700 --> 00:16:50,300
GUYS, YOU DON'T PRANCERCISE
410
00:16:50,300 --> 00:17:01,870
YOU'RE PLAYING WITH FIRE.
411
00:17:01,867 --> 00:17:02,667
>> Tosh: THANK YOU.
412
00:17:02,667 --> 00:17:05,367
MY BODY FEELS INCREDIBLE
413
00:17:05,367 --> 00:17:06,327
PRANCERCISE LADY.
414
00:17:06,333 --> 00:17:07,533
>> REMEMBER, DANIEL, KEEP ON
415
00:17:07,533 --> 00:17:13,373
PRANCING.
416
00:17:13,367 --> 00:17:14,527
KEEP PRANCING.
417
00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:17,303
KEEP ON PRANCING.
418
00:17:17,300 --> 00:17:18,300
>> Tosh: THAT'S ALSO HOW
419
00:17:18,300 --> 00:17:20,370
BREAKING BAD IS GOING TO END.
420
00:17:20,367 --> 00:17:21,867
MOVING ON I THINK WE CAN ALL
421
00:17:21,867 --> 00:17:25,397
AGREE THE WORSE PART OF THIS
422
00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:28,100
SHOW ARE YOUR VIEWER VIDEOS.
423
00:17:28,100 --> 00:17:30,730
THEY'RE TOO LONG SO TO REBOOT
424
00:17:30,733 --> 00:17:34,173
THE FRANCHISE I INVENTED VINE.
425
00:17:34,167 --> 00:17:36,267
IT LIMITS YOUR VIDEOS TO A
426
00:17:36,267 --> 00:17:37,867
BARABLE SIX SECONDS.
427
00:17:37,867 --> 00:17:39,197
HERE'S THE VIEWER VINE OF THE
428
00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:40,270
WEEK.
429
00:17:40,267 --> 00:17:46,127
>> I'M HERE WITH ME AND MY MOM.
430
00:17:46,133 --> 00:17:47,403
>> Tosh: ACTUALLY WOULDN'T MIND
431
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:48,730
WATCHING THAT AGAIN.
432
00:17:48,733 --> 00:17:50,873
>> I'M HERE TODAY WITH MY MOM.
433
00:17:50,867 --> 00:17:54,697
HI, MOM.
434
00:17:54,700 --> 00:17:56,730
>> Tosh: I'M GLAD I INVENTED
435
00:17:56,733 --> 00:17:57,273
VINE.
436
00:17:57,267 --> 00:17:58,567
GOOD INVENTION, DANIEL.
437
00:17:58,567 --> 00:18:00,697
WE'LL BE BACK WITH MORE USO
438
00:18:00,700 --> 00:18:01,370
COMEDY TOUR.
439
00:18:13,467 --> 00:18:15,827
>> Tosh: WELCOME BACK, FOOTBALL.
440
00:18:15,833 --> 00:18:17,073
THANKS AGAIN FOR NOTHING,
441
00:18:17,067 --> 00:18:17,597
BASEBALL.
442
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:20,070
NOW, WHO WANTS TO SEE NEXT
443
00:18:20,067 --> 00:18:21,467
WEEK'S WEB REDEMPTION?
444
00:18:21,467 --> 00:18:23,067
SHOW IT.
445
00:18:23,067 --> 00:18:26,797
>> ALL RIGHT, NEW YORKERS, THIS
446
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:28,900
ISN'T APPROPRIATE BUT IT IS
447
00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:29,400
TODAY.
448
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:34,100
ANYBODY WITH A PAIR JOIN ME,
449
00:18:34,100 --> 00:18:40,400
USA, USA, USA, ANYBODY GIVE
450
00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:41,200
[BLEEP]?
451
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:41,830
USA, USA.
452
00:18:41,833 --> 00:18:43,933
ALL RIGHT.
453
00:18:43,933 --> 00:18:46,173
>> Tosh: WHERE'S THE TRAIN
454
00:18:46,167 --> 00:18:46,797
GOING?
455
00:18:46,800 --> 00:18:47,570
ISLAMABAD?
456
00:18:47,567 --> 00:18:50,697
THIS COUNTRY NEEDS TO GET ITS
457
00:18:50,700 --> 00:18:51,630
PRIDE BACK.
458
00:18:51,633 --> 00:18:53,933
RECORD YOURSELF CHANTING USA AND
459
00:18:53,933 --> 00:18:58,403
I'LL PUT YOU ON NEXT WEEK'S WEB
460
00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:03,630
REDEMPTION SEND IT TO ME ON
461
00:19:03,633 --> 00:19:04,703
TWITTER USING #USATOSH.
462
00:19:04,700 --> 00:19:06,070
AND WE'LL LIVE CHAT DURING THE
463
00:19:06,067 --> 00:19:09,067
SHOW AND KEEP ON WITH OUR BLOG
464
00:19:09,067 --> 00:19:11,567
AND SEE ME DO STANDUP IN
465
00:19:11,567 --> 00:19:14,727
SEATTLE, PHOENIX AND OTHER
466
00:19:14,733 --> 00:19:18,233
LAWLE
467
00:19:18,233 --> 00:19:20,903
LAWLESS INDIAN RESERVATIONS AND
468
00:19:20,900 --> 00:19:24,130
THE NEXT EPISODE OF BRICKLEBERRY
469
00:19:24,133 --> 00:19:24,903
IS NEXT.
470
00:19:24,900 --> 00:19:28,930
WHY IS 2013 BETTER THAN 2012?
471
00:19:28,933 --> 00:19:30,673
THANKS TO LAX LAWS IN KOREA
472
00:19:30,667 --> 00:19:32,967
THERE'S MORE DETAILS AND FINALLY
473
00:19:32,967 --> 00:19:33,467
MILL
474
00:19:33,467 --> 00:19:34,567
BEING LET'S TALK ABOUT IT.
475
00:19:34,567 --> 00:19:35,867
DID YOU KNOW THE MILK YOU'VE
476
00:19:35,867 --> 00:19:38,297
BEEN DRINKING IS DISGUSTING AND
477
00:19:38,300 --> 00:19:38,870
IMPURE?
478
00:19:38,867 --> 00:19:41,167
THE FOLKS AT WHITE POWER MILK
479
00:19:41,167 --> 00:19:44,067
DOT COM THINK SO.
480
00:19:44,067 --> 00:19:48,597
GO BEYOND PASTURIZATION TO
481
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:51,970
RACIAL PURIFICATION.
482
00:19:51,967 --> 00:19:53,927
THEY HAVE WOMEN THAT SEND YOU
483
00:19:53,933 --> 00:19:54,733
THE MILK.
484
00:19:54,733 --> 00:19:55,703
I DID DIGGING.
485
00:19:55,700 --> 00:19:58,730
TURNS OUT THE COMPANY'S OUT OF
486
00:19:58,733 --> 00:20:00,033
BIGGING OR MAYBE FAKE BUT I'M
487
00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:01,533
NOT CRYING OVER IT INSTEAD I
488
00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:04,103
PICKED UP THE TORCH AND STARTED
489
00:20:04,100 --> 00:20:28,230
PURIFYING MILK MYSELF.
490
00:20:28,233 --> 00:20:48,173
>> Tosh: THANKS A LOT.
491
00:20:48,167 --> 00:20:50,727
>> THANK YOU.
492
00:20:50,733 --> 00:20:51,473
>> Tosh: ALL RIGHT.
493
00:20:51,467 --> 00:20:53,427
I'VE DUMBED YOU DOWN FOR FIVE
494
00:20:53,433 --> 00:20:55,003
STRAIGHT SEASONS AND THAT'S WHY
495
00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:57,100
STARTING CONTINUED WE'LL END
496
00:20:57,100 --> 00:20:59,830
EVERY EPISODE WITH A BRAIN
497
00:20:59,833 --> 00:21:00,803
TEASER.
498
00:21:00,800 --> 00:21:03,400
IF YOU DON'T HAVE IS A DVR YOU
499
00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:05,070
HAVE A HUGE ADVANTAGE.
500
00:21:05,067 --> 00:21:06,667
FIRST PERSON TO SOLVE IT GET A
501
00:21:06,667 --> 00:21:07,197
RETWEET.
502
00:21:07,200 --> 00:21:08,670
THAT'S RIGHT, A RETWEET.
503
00:21:08,667 --> 00:21:18,297
GOOD NIGHT.
504
00:21:18,300 --> 00:21:24,700
[ COUGHING ]
505
00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:26,530
>>I THOUGHT YOU WERE REALLY
506
00:21:26,533 --> 00:21:27,233
CHOKING.
31396
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