Original subtitles

There is a barber in Barcelona

that only shaves the locals

they don't shave themselves.

But, and there comes the paradox,

the barber… is also a resident of Barcelona.

So the barber

shaves himself if…,

and only if…,

he does not shave himself.

We have reached a contradiction

in which is given… alpha

just in the case

of non-alpha.

Welcome to the world of self-referential paradoxes

that we will discover in Philosophy of Language.

Hi Oti.

You finally answer the call to a friend.

Sorry, I took a vacation after Etienne.

Yeah, I get it, it was so suddenly…

Pol, man, we miss you.

Biel doesn't stop looking at my tits.

I miss you too.

We have started "Edge" of Language.

Will you pass me the notes?

If you come for them…

Get them ready, I'm going today.

Pol!

What?

Nothing, I wanted to know

if you go to college today.

Yes. The teachers' strike is over.

Hey, how's it going in the parking lot?

As always, with the boss playing the balls…

I'm going. Have a good day. Ah, very good.

Today I will also be back late.

A boy is coming who is a chess master

to show us some plays. Oh yeah? Caramba…

Bye, see you later. Bye.

Do not look at me like that.

When you start lying, it is difficult to get out of the loop.

Ya, ya.

I would tell him the truth, if he were as "forward" as you.

Good. Hi how are things?

I come in a cap. You smoke, right?

Yes. Fuck. Ah.

I've run out of tobacco.

Excuse me for interrupting your artwork.

You see.

Do you smoke in here? Yes.

Quiet, everything controlled. Yes…

No, no, no, no, I'd rather turn it on outside.

I understand that you no longer come to my classes.

He is the only one who knows how to fix something in this faculty.

Maybe one day I run away. Escape…

Escape sounds good.

They have also spoken well to me of Metaphysics.

You can attend as a listener wherever you please.

In Philosophy, metaphysics is more important, right?

It doesn't have to.

Well, ethics have existed for as long as humanity has existed.

And metaphysics speaks of what already existed.

It is as if it were more authentically philosophy.

Are your parents alive?

Uh… yeah. I'll kill them tonight.

And tomorrow, you and I will talk about metaphysics.

Alfonso!

Alfonso!

Alfonso!

The mother who bore me!

Are you also deaf or what? Ma'am, what are you doing?

What are you doing touching my underwear?

Well, what am I going to do? The laundry.

You know very well that this is Herminia's thing.

Okay, but let him know that I do the laundry at home.

I am not his wife. My panties don't touch!

OK agreed. Excuse me

Oh, and while you're here, pick up the dropped flowerpot.

Oysters, will be…

Your! I hope you give Alfonso a shot.

Man, Pol, about time. Where were you?

I took a rest.

It has cost me to assimilate the problem that of my father.

Already. I spent a lot with you.

I made you a chicken, man! You see, calm down.

In my house there is bad vibes.

Gloria still freaks out with the fine from the Treasury.

You're fine? Damn.

Well that's it. If I have taken

a rich vacation, like you.

Who we have here! Good.

- Oh! - Hey! It took you already.

Hello. How's it going? Did you think I was leaving the "uni"?

Yes man! I'm here to give it my all!

What's up, Biel? Here.

To celebrate tonight we have dinner at my house,

that already touches, right? Whoops, caviar!

You leave the parking lot and go straight.

I no longer work in the parking lot, the boss fired me.

No… he renewed my contract. I don't know, I'm looking for a job.

Do you know who could help you? Angel.

Angel? The… the one with Satanassa?

Yes. He helped me set up the "Philofiesta"

and you have ideas… very cool. Well, total,

that working as a waiter gets an extra 100 euros in tips.

Woof! Fuck not bad.

Let's see if I get a job too.

- You shut up, you live off your parents. - I will call him

Because the scholarship is bad with the fucking Ethics exam.

Man, the missing one.

How's it going? That you.

Are you okay? I saw you a little upset.

Ah, I'm fine.

He had argued with Rai over a silly thing.

I made a mess for you… Nothing happens.

I liked seeing you like this.

Oh yeah?

Wow…

Yes, I don't know, you have a strong uncle appearance,

But I saw that you are also vulnerable.

Do you like the bastards?

Did I say "bastard"? No, but how… do you like it

see people… have a hard time or what?

A little touchy.

No, it is that people are not of one piece and

I found that you neither.

No, no, of course. We could stay.

It would be good.

Are you free today?

Today… a colleague will help me find a job.

Let's see if we are lucky.

We'll see.

I'm going to Bolaño's class. What are you doing?

Are you coming or… do you have a job?

I have gigs.

Every year the first-year students arrive less prepared.

And you look like next year.

Yes! For you it all started when you were born.

They don't care what got us here.

They are primitive beings, crammed with superfluous information.

Let's see, don't barricade me.

Telling you about this has served as an introduction

to ask them the following question:

if we were completely sincere, would there be ethics?

I do not think so. Why?

Because… going through life telling the truth would be

the chaos.

That is, lack of sincerity helps maintain order

that keeps us from living like savages.

So so.

Dostoevsky wrote:

"If the human being told his most intimate secrets,

there would be a stench

that would make the world an unbreathable place. "

Fucking disgusting, man.

Yes.

I think that there would be ethics

even if we decided to be… absolutely sincere.

Explain yourself.

Oh no… I don't know…

I say that the…, the human being tends to overcome

the worst circumstances, then…,

just for simple survival, don't you know…,

would not create a new ethic?

Surely.

And as an ethic, it would require a balance between telling the truth

and do the right thing.

Because "ethics" is not synonymous with "truth",

although it is as necessary as the air we breathe.

Yes, the son of Joaquim Torné takes care,

the master cabinetmaker.

Now he has retired in Ampurdán

and he has passed the business on to Axel.

That one will make a career.

Shoulder!

Shoulder!

- Hello. - Hello.

Can you warn Axel, please?

The members of the Board of Trustees have come.

-Uh… I think he's in class.

Ah, no, of course, it's true, we left them an empty classroom

to save material. So that…,

They have… more space, more…

We are here: as soon as we reconcile,

You already ask me to buy you something.

But I just like this table.

Laura, I'm not going to buy you any furniture

because you and Victor don't have a flat yet.

Because you don't like any floor. How sad you are with the subject.

Most flats in Barcelona suck.

Hello.

Hello.

Do you remember me?

Yes, of course I remember.

How are you Well, and you?

Come on… wait for me in the library.

OK.

What, are you coming for exam review?

Yes, I already asked you if you would let me repeat it.

Ah! Do you forget to draw your pubic hair

and do you want to raise the grade?

Maria, I screwed up a lot.

I don't know, I… I blocked myself. But I need to pass Ethics

so that they give me the scholarship. Well, having thought about it before.

Although it may not seem like it to you, I am a teacher of integrity.

I do not ask you to approve me for the nose,

just that… let me repeat it.

I could do it today.

I am not going to give you any favors

no matter how much acorn ham you give me.

Do you think I'm asking you for a whim?

I'm not okay, Maria. I already know it.

You can see it in your face, there are already two of us.

But I can't repeat the exam for you.

I get to know it and I copy it, as others do.

How?

Who copied?

I'm not going to tell you.

Tell me right now who has copied in an exam by María Bolaño.

And I forget my professional ethics

and you can repeat the exam.

Sit down, it will be just a little while.

Yeah right.

Wow! Yes Yes.

Brutal, I'm very happy. I did not expect.

It does not surprise me. A 10. Yes. Yes, yes.

Cross out one.

Cross out one.

But why?

How I enjoyed watching her copy with the hidden mobile.

And you don't know how I have waited for this moment.

See your face go from joy to disgrace.

Let's see, I… It's not… I'm sorry.

How lazy to listen to his explanations.

I've only asked you one thing and I've already told you twice.

Don't make me repeat it for a third time.

Ms…

Does it have to appear as a spectrum?

Excuse me

What does he want?

Well, it was pending to talk about the contract.

Here we are… Rai takes it.

It's just that I can't… charge in black.

Another little thing.

Could you come out a little earlier today?

Look at you, Gloria, my partner, you have no idea

that I am working here to pay my debt to the treasury.

I don't know what more lies to tell to cover the fact that I'm not at home.

I wouldn't want Gloria to get mad.

I'm a widower.

I've been alone too long in my life.

You can leave whenever you want.

Say goodbye to work.

I arrive at the auditorium with those of the Board of Trustees

and they tell me that you have become a listener in a class.

And on top of that, I find this shit.

Doctor Llorenç, let's talk about it…

I will not go down in history as the rector who burned down the auditorium.

Your father already told me to watch you.

- Is that what he told you? - And today I have confirmed it

when we have talked.

- Have you explained it to him? - Yes, it's the first thing I've done.

Boy I don't doubt your talent

but that you smoke next to a hundred-year-old wood

it is inadmissible.

You can go now.

- How do you know this cigarette butt is mine? - It is not yours? Whose is it?

- From an operator? - No, no, neither.

There are a lot of people at the university…

Fuck…

You have a sense of humor. And you want me to look like an idiot.

The cigarette butt is not mine or my team.

I only ask that you investigate before you accuse me.

-Do you want me to investigate?

Perfect, I investigate.

Axel, who smoked in the auditorium?

No, look, I'll tell you another way.

Don't you want me to kick you out?

Whose butt was it?

I've been about to kick Axel out.

Shoulder?

Yes, the one who listens to your classes.

He thought it was he who had smoked in the auditorium,

But I know it was you

Let's see… No, no, no, no. Do not deny it.

I know.

Go to the carpenter…

You are a professor and I can't fire you, but… I can let you know.

And what do you have to tell me about? I know you have a difficult time.

Anxiety, dislikes, overcome many things. Perfect.

But look, if you do one thing that distresses me,

then we have a problem.

Maria, you, to me,

you are not going to burn the auditorium.

To the next,

I'm going to move the strings that it takes

so that they send you to smoke at home.

How strong, man, a zero.

-Playing with Bolaño is very risky.

-It is that first he gives me a ten and then…

I do not get it. It's like evil.

- Easy, the next exam will help you study.

I have techniques that work very well.

-How cute. Do we start today?

-Voucher. Come to my house.

- With Arnau there? - No, come on, you come to my apartment.

- No, no… No. - The mother who gave birth to you, Rai!

- You're a bastard, man. - What a damn scare.

Well, at home I have firecrackers. Shall we throw them out after dinner?

- Have dinner? - Huh?

I've ordered sushi for everyone. We meet at… 9:00 p.m.

Voucher? My stomach has closed up.

Come on. Suddenly I have zero in Ethics.

Also, Biel, he teaches me study techniques.

-Yes. Rai, it's three-quarters of an hour to your house.

- Come on, don't freak out, no. - And what do you celebrate?

I want to have dinner with you.

And you give me ideas to decorate, I have sold the San Pedro.

- What? - Don't fuck around!

Yes. Weren't you in love with that painting?

- Well not yet. - Well, don't take it badly.

- Let's meet another day, okay? - Freeze the sushi.

"An eight-foot bed!"

You and Ferrán will not meet all night!

- No way! - Yes, yesterday I sent you a location.

Well, that's what they want: not to meet.

- What a bastard! - No way,

- we are falling in love again. - Oh.

- Huy, what about you? - I don't like to tell you about Ferran.

I see you so alone…

-I am single convinced, you know.

- How about you, Vicky? - Isn't it time to find someone?

Excuse me.

Ma'am, I'm going. I've left a broth in the fridge for you.

-Oh, Alfonso, if we have plenty of broth.

Yes, but this is not from the supermarket, it is mine.

I've even put a chicken carcass on it.

I call it the "Alfonso touch".

Well nothing

go well and excuse me.

- Well, well, well, well… - And this older man?

- Alfonso is Henry's replacement. - Ah!

-Substitute only in housework.

- Ah, well… - He's very old, isn't he?

Don't drop it down the stairs.

-Yes, it doesn't look very athletic, no.

-Rai got very heavy and, total, for a few months…

-He seems like a good man, doesn't he?

And he has made you broth with "Alfonso touch".

What else do you want?

-Yes, but that of the chicken carcass…

Ugh, they are things that if you do them, it is better not to explain them, right?

Are you praying

I have broken all ethical principles.

Ah.

In what way?

Telling the truth.

Fuck.

Well, I have done it the other way around, I have skipped ethics by lying.

But you said it in class: it's survival.

Yes, or… Or selfishness.

"I absolve you".

-I listened to your mother.

And the first thing you do is try to burn down this building?

- It took you a long time to show up. - AHA.

I asked the rector to give you a chance.

And for the record, I didn't do it for you

But for your grandfather, for me…, for the company.

-Your problem is that you don't accept that I work my way.

-Ah, and your way is to smoke in here

and go as a listener to the classes.

Fuck, what a shame.

-How you like to ridicule me.

-That's how you have made me feel:

ridiculous.

-Look, the rector knows that I have not smoked.

-Yes, he already told me.

A teacher, right?

I don't know if that woman has smoked here,

but you sure do, I know you.

Passion,

sacrifice,

satisfaction.

And you, none of the three.

-Well… if you study while listening to baroque music,

your brain… it's kind of… widens, you know?

-But… does it have to be baroque music?

Yes?

- My mother. - And what is the problem?

- My mother! - Ok, uh, we pretend that we study,

open the book and…, and take out papers and do things.

- This is my mother. - Hello.

- I help Biel to study. - What do you want?

-Oti.

Your father is very worried, he won't stop talking about you.

- We see you lost. - And all because I'm not with Arnau?

-Girl, I find it hard to speak in front of this boy.

- Ah, I'm… I'm going. - You stay!

We are not dating, he is homosexual.

- You have the face of getting good grades. - Wow, yeah.

- What about you, Oti? - Has an outstanding in Ethics.

Yes? An outstanding.

- You have failed Ethics. - Mom, stop.

-You are failing the subjects.

Tell me the truth because I don't know how to lie

and if you want me to help you with your father…

- Yes, I failed an exam. - What happens? Did you approve of everything?

-I won't tell dad anything.

When you have to pay the tuition for the next course

and see that you have suspended,

- close the tap. - Oh, why don't you go?

-Oh, Oti…

Are you really interested in philosophy?

Do you know what you want to do? Hey?

So much work with termites,

he has learned to behave like them.

Hey, I didn't want to… Don't come with "I didn't want to."

If I wanted.

Ok, yes. Well say it clear, damn it.

I wanted to save my neck by accusing her unjustly.

You have that little bit of bad host necessary to survive.

I guess so.

Storks do it, you won't.

Storks are cruel to their young.

What is very exhausting to feed three chickens?

Well I throw the weakest into the void and live,

That is what it is.

Shoulder!

He was right, the Metaphysics class with Sílvia Montoliu

worth it.

She was a student of mine.

I hope you don't come back to my class

with that fanny pack.

Ok, Angel. Yes, yes, see you at the Satanassa.

No, don't worry, I don't take it for granted.

Yes Yes. Goodbye. Thanks.

They have arrived today. They are Russian.

Why do tourists always laugh?

Someone laugh, at least, because here, in this house…

Lately, a lot of things are quiet.

I am not dumb.

Alfonso is not interested in chess at all.

He has received a fine from the Treasury.

7000 euros.

He's working at Rai's house.

He is ashamed to tell you.

Hello.

Hello. Are you Angel?

-I am, I am!

Kevin, charge table 2 and 4. Are you staying around here?

Well, well, well, my discobolo.

How are you? Well.

Come, you will meet Dino.

Who is Dino? The owner of all this, honey.

Now he will act, but then you talk.

Already. And is he a good uncle or what?

Let's see, it's special.

Maybe he sees you and hires you directly or…

-Forgiveness.

-Talk to you and say: "I'm not interested."

Already. Well, throw me a cable, man.

Sure, but for that you will have to smile

Like this is Disney

Bravo. Very well.

- Come on let's go. - Bravo!

-I've seen things

that you would not believe.

I've seen

the attack of a group of males between the seats

of a cinema X.

I've seen the rays of the sun

make your way on Las Ramblas, near the Liceo door.

Oh…

-All those moments will be lost in time, like tears…,

down a toilet drain in Chinatown.

Viva mi nardo!

Do any of you know that my mother passed away a month ago?

I know there is a rumor around Maricolandia.

And I'm very happy to disappoint you, hyenas of Babylon,

because it is false

that I have decided to spend the savings

in cloning my mother.

-It will be…!

No. No. I'm not Barbra Streisand and my mother isn't her dog Sammy.

"Amy, you're fucking good".

- "I know", you too. - We already have something in common.

- Well, two things, right? - We are both Republicans.

- "¿Are you stupid?". - "OK, OK, sorry".

-Hola. "Hello".

-It is for this reason that I do not reach orgasm with a man.

-Arnau, are you already making Amy nervous?

-Oti, shut up.

-I am a democrat, it has nothing to do with being in favor of arms.

- Very well. - Well, let's go to the bedroom.

I'll… I'll explain… study techniques.

-And one thing, by the way…,

you said this about orgasm… seriously.

- "Yeah". I don't know, it's like the penis blocks me.

"Do you know?" I give myself, I give myself, I give it all

but… I did not arrive.

"Anyway".

- "¡Come on, shot!". - "Shot, shot".

It is normal for your mother to ask you what you want to do.

-She wanted to be an asshole and she succeeded.

-Do not pass.

-OK.

-I don't know, it's just that I'm tired of my parents.

In addition, they do not stop threatening to separate.

- And they will never divorce. - Already.

The same.

Sight,

I don't know what I'll do

But I know how I want to live

-Y…

How do you want to live?

- Well… - Like most people.

No… I don't want to enslave myself by working. You know?

I want a life… easy and fun.

- And now I want to fuck. - Ah.

-What?

I have caught your eyes.

It is time to touch us.

-Can I… touch your boobs?

-And I have the dick.

I still remember a memorable day.

Dino and I were walking down a back road

in Almendralejo. 1985?

-¿1984?

-That. When two civil guards

they stopped us. Beautiful!

- Yeah, well, but we were lucky. - Huh?

- Damn, they were both active. - Ah.

- Dino, sorry to interrupt. - I'd like to introduce you to a friend.

Philosophy student. It's called Pol.

- Surname Vazo, Pol Vazo. - Penny, please.

- Hello. - Came to see you act,

but also to offer himself as a waiter,

in case one day it is necessary.

He is disciplined, responsible, a good person, intelligent…

-Well, okay, okay, don't fire the Venezuelan submachine gun at me.

Sit down.

Leave room for him.

- Hi Hi. - Hello.

- So you like to serve drinks. - Yes.

Do you know how to make cocktails?

Of course.

How does the Bloody Mary fit you?

Delicious.

Why does a Philosophy student want to work in this joint?

Well… if I told you that I need pasta a lot,

I would be telling you a half truth.

So tell me the truth, the whole truth

and so I will be happy.

In college I think too much.

Ah, well, and here we do not think, of course.

As you can see, the physique is not important to work here.

But a University of Chicago study says

that the admiration of beauty causes thirst.

-Certificate.

-Health.

-Stand up.

What are you wearing under that jacket?

A T-shirt.

- Out of the hunter. - Hmm.

-Go to the bar. And within

of the hours

I pay you a visit and count the drinks you have served.

-My mother.

-How handsome!

♪ You are a mutant,

♪ you have scales on the back and on the front.

♪ I am human,

♪ I don't have fins or suction cups on my hands.

♪ But I want to give you good love.

♪ What I feel for you

♪ is more radioactive than plutonium.

♪ Life is about more than losing hair.

♪ I would like to be your husband

♪ not caring what they might say. ♪

Very good, yes. I charge you.

♪ I like you like that. ♪

Don't shave. I'm missing the bison hunter profile.

Is the job mine?

I'm going to get didactic.

Loyalty is a feeling that is above ambition.

Honestly, I see you looking like a slut.

I only ask you not to fail me.

I don't like feeling betrayed.

I'm not going to work here, Dino.

I am a little traitor.

Today I have betrayed my father

And a friend of mine has failed an exam because of me.

I spend the day pretending in front of everyone

especially from the person I like the most.

And I don't know how to do "bloodymarys".

I'm just trying to live

Come with me.

Put four ice cubes in this shaker.

Add vodka.

Well. Now the blood.

A little bit of salt…,

five drops of tabasco,

salsa Perrins…

Ya. ¿Ya?

Yes. His little bit of pepper.

To beat.

Hey, put the brakes on, boy.

Carefully, as if you were doing a massage

Zeus himself in the eggs.

To serve.

Today you close.

Me? So you can see that I trust you.

Pol… I don't like it.

I will call you…

Apollo.

♪ Give yourself, my life, give me your love.

♪ Marry me, I want to give you a boy.

♪ No import or sale march '.

♪ No import or sale march '.

♪ You are a mutant,

♪ your chromosomes are a creepy picture.

♪ I am human,

♪ I'm not slimy like you and your brother.

♪ But I want to give you good love,

♪ what I feel for you is poisonous

♪ and durable.

♪ Life is about more than losing hair… ♪