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1
00:00:00,083 --> 00:00:02,133
(upbeat music)
2
00:00:07,709 --> 00:00:08,879
Hey, Rudy, what are you watching?
3
00:00:09,083 --> 00:00:10,083
"What Did You Do?"
4
00:00:10,166 --> 00:00:11,626
Oh, we worked out, got a cheeseburger,
5
00:00:11,709 --> 00:00:13,749
and then came in here
and asked you what you were watching.
6
00:00:13,834 --> 00:00:14,884
What are you watching?
7
00:00:15,375 --> 00:00:16,495
"What Did You Do?"
8
00:00:16,583 --> 00:00:18,503
Dude, I told you, we got a cheeseburger,
9
00:00:18,583 --> 00:00:20,003
- we worked out--
- No!
10
00:00:20,083 --> 00:00:21,923
It's the name of my favorite TV show.
11
00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:25,750
They use hidden cameras and actors
to capture real people doing good deeds.
12
00:00:25,834 --> 00:00:26,834
Oh.
13
00:00:27,250 --> 00:00:29,710
Excuse me sir, I'm Don Quinonas,
14
00:00:29,792 --> 00:00:32,542
host of "What Did You Do?"
15
00:00:32,625 --> 00:00:36,165
My hidden cameras just captured you
doing something remarkable.
16
00:00:36,250 --> 00:00:39,630
- you gave $500...
- (sighs)
17
00:00:39,959 --> 00:00:41,829
...to a complete stranger...
18
00:00:41,917 --> 00:00:43,287
(sighs)
19
00:00:43,375 --> 00:00:46,705
...so he could get
his cat's broken tail fixed.
20
00:00:46,792 --> 00:00:48,922
(groans)
Look, he's...
21
00:00:49,375 --> 00:00:50,455
Oh, god.
22
00:00:50,542 --> 00:00:52,382
Oh. I gotta be on this show...
23
00:00:52,875 --> 00:00:55,245
so people will know
that I'm better than they are.
24
00:00:56,667 --> 00:00:57,787
And humble.
25
00:00:58,125 --> 00:00:59,205
So humble.
26
00:01:01,542 --> 00:01:02,712
Oh, hey.
27
00:01:02,792 --> 00:01:04,632
How's your volunteer job
at the history museum going?
28
00:01:04,709 --> 00:01:06,629
Oh, I love it. I'm working right now.
29
00:01:06,709 --> 00:01:09,169
- (bell ringing)
- Man: Gather round, good townspeople.
30
00:01:09,542 --> 00:01:10,752
Those are the Living Legends.
31
00:01:10,834 --> 00:01:13,424
They're traveling actors
doing a show at the museum.
32
00:01:13,500 --> 00:01:16,960
Their motto is,
"We make history come to life."
33
00:01:17,291 --> 00:01:20,671
Oh, five bucks say
they make Jerry fall asleep!
34
00:01:22,250 --> 00:01:23,290
Come on.
35
00:01:26,041 --> 00:01:27,041
Jerry...
36
00:01:27,125 --> 00:01:31,165
meet Ben Franklin, Albert Einstein,
Cleopatra, and Attila the Hun.
37
00:01:31,458 --> 00:01:34,418
Hun? Pretty sure Attila's a dude.
38
00:01:35,625 --> 00:01:39,245
Early to bed, early to rise,
makes a man healthy, wealthy,
39
00:01:39,291 --> 00:01:40,751
and wise.
40
00:01:40,834 --> 00:01:43,084
Early to bed, early to rise,
41
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go hit a treadmill and lay off the fries.
42
00:01:45,750 --> 00:01:46,710
(chuckles)
43
00:01:46,792 --> 00:01:50,252
In my day,
the young respected their elders.
44
00:01:50,500 --> 00:01:51,580
Yeah, well in my day,
45
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dudes didn't wear
their sister's stockings.
46
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,710
- I'm gonna get--
- Keep it together, Carl,
47
00:01:57,792 --> 00:01:59,252
keep it together.
48
00:02:00,417 --> 00:02:01,917
Ladies and gentlemen,
49
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:07,710
gather round and witness how I discovered
that lightning is electricity.
50
00:02:07,792 --> 00:02:09,382
(yawning)
51
00:02:09,417 --> 00:02:10,917
I'll need a volunteer.
52
00:02:11,667 --> 00:02:13,037
Oh, uh...
53
00:02:13,125 --> 00:02:14,205
You!
54
00:02:18,542 --> 00:02:20,922
Huh! He never uses volunteers.
55
00:02:21,000 --> 00:02:23,210
I was flying my kite on a stormy night,
56
00:02:23,291 --> 00:02:24,881
- when suddenly...
- (beeps)
57
00:02:24,959 --> 00:02:28,209
- ( thunder crashes)
- (electricity crackling)
58
00:02:28,291 --> 00:02:29,131
(beeps)
59
00:02:33,291 --> 00:02:34,331
Is...
60
00:02:34,834 --> 00:02:36,294
Is that how he got you?
61
00:02:38,625 --> 00:02:39,785
(theme music)
62
00:02:39,875 --> 00:02:43,035
♪ Don't you get all tough with me ♪
63
00:02:43,125 --> 00:02:47,205
♪ I'm saying won't you
Come kick it with me? ♪
64
00:02:47,291 --> 00:02:49,791
♪ And we could have a ball
Run up the wall ♪
65
00:02:49,875 --> 00:02:51,535
♪ That's just how we do ♪
66
00:02:51,625 --> 00:02:53,625
♪ And no matter how much
I chop and punch ♪
67
00:02:53,709 --> 00:02:56,669
♪ It's not as cool
As kickin' it with you ♪
68
00:02:56,750 --> 00:02:58,420
♪ Here we go, let's start the party ♪
69
00:02:58,500 --> 00:03:00,290
♪ Chop it up like it's karate ♪
70
00:03:00,417 --> 00:03:01,627
♪ Everybody ♪
71
00:03:01,709 --> 00:03:05,079
♪ Won't you come kick it with me? ♪
72
00:03:05,166 --> 00:03:07,746
♪ And we could have a ball
Run up the wall ♪
73
00:03:07,834 --> 00:03:09,714
♪ That's just how we do ♪
74
00:03:09,792 --> 00:03:11,632
♪ And no matter how much
I chop and punch ♪
75
00:03:11,709 --> 00:03:14,669
♪ It's not as cool
As kickin' it with you ♪
76
00:03:15,083 --> 00:03:17,083
(upbeat music)
77
00:03:18,959 --> 00:03:20,289
Okay, would you rather
78
00:03:20,375 --> 00:03:23,415
be a Neanderthal
facing a saber-toothed tiger,
79
00:03:23,500 --> 00:03:26,710
or a peasant facing the Bubonic plague?
80
00:03:26,792 --> 00:03:29,292
Oh, that is a good one.
81
00:03:29,333 --> 00:03:32,173
Ugh, whichever kills me quicker.
82
00:03:32,834 --> 00:03:34,294
Man, you nerds need to get a life.
83
00:03:34,709 --> 00:03:36,289
History is Important, Jerry.
84
00:03:36,375 --> 00:03:37,875
It's why we volunteer at the museum.
85
00:03:37,959 --> 00:03:39,579
I still can't believe
you guys don't get paid.
86
00:03:39,667 --> 00:03:41,787
Whoa, we get paid...
87
00:03:42,125 --> 00:03:43,575
in knowledge!
88
00:03:43,834 --> 00:03:45,754
All: Whoo-hoo!
89
00:03:45,834 --> 00:03:48,384
We're making deposits
in the brain bank, yo.
90
00:03:48,458 --> 00:03:50,248
- Yeah!
- All: Cha-ching!
91
00:03:50,333 --> 00:03:52,133
Oh, wow. Okay.
92
00:03:54,417 --> 00:03:56,287
Guys, Chloe's here.
Quick, nerd breath check.
93
00:03:57,041 --> 00:03:58,461
(all gagging)
94
00:03:58,917 --> 00:04:00,037
Oh, one of us has stink mouth,
95
00:04:00,125 --> 00:04:01,535
- I think it's me.
- No, I think it's me.
96
00:04:01,625 --> 00:04:02,455
Chloe: Hey, guys.
97
00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:04,042
Milton and Sydney:
Teddy's got stink mouth!
98
00:04:06,000 --> 00:04:07,710
Milton, we changed the schedule.
99
00:04:07,792 --> 00:04:10,582
You'll be working with me
in the samurai wing tomorrow.
100
00:04:10,625 --> 00:04:11,705
Oh...
101
00:04:13,041 --> 00:04:14,961
Oh, Jerry, this is Chloe. She's our--
102
00:04:15,041 --> 00:04:19,921
Robot. All right, you guys
finally perfected the robo-girlfriend.
103
00:04:21,542 --> 00:04:22,962
Oh, great job.
104
00:04:23,166 --> 00:04:24,786
It's a big improvement
over the floor waxer
105
00:04:24,875 --> 00:04:26,825
Sydney put a bra on and called Sophia.
106
00:04:27,667 --> 00:04:28,707
I miss Sophia.
107
00:04:31,458 --> 00:04:32,788
Can I borrow her for the prom?
108
00:04:33,917 --> 00:04:35,207
Ah! She's so realistic.
109
00:04:35,291 --> 00:04:36,541
I'm not going to prom with you.
110
00:04:36,625 --> 00:04:38,035
Very realistic.
111
00:04:39,333 --> 00:04:43,173
Jerry, Chloe is the head
of our volunteer program at the museum.
112
00:04:43,333 --> 00:04:45,583
And like me, she loves history.
113
00:04:45,875 --> 00:04:46,955
Oh, really?
114
00:04:47,250 --> 00:04:49,580
Well, uh, what it do, girl?
115
00:04:49,667 --> 00:04:51,167
And what year did it do it in?
116
00:04:52,250 --> 00:04:53,540
(shudders)
117
00:04:53,625 --> 00:04:55,625
(upbeat music)
118
00:05:00,917 --> 00:05:03,707
Hey, not on my wharf, tough guys.
119
00:05:03,792 --> 00:05:05,002
Get outta here.
120
00:05:05,625 --> 00:05:06,825
And tell your friends...
121
00:05:07,041 --> 00:05:09,831
when Rudy's on duty,
they better watch their booty.
122
00:05:12,041 --> 00:05:13,421
Okay, don't tell them that. Just go.
123
00:05:15,000 --> 00:05:15,960
Hey.
124
00:05:16,959 --> 00:05:18,249
I think you're safe now, pal.
125
00:05:19,041 --> 00:05:21,421
Just know that this only happened
because wearing this...
126
00:05:22,166 --> 00:05:23,376
dorky backpack.
127
00:05:23,750 --> 00:05:25,580
I mean, who wears
a tickly turtle backpack?
128
00:05:25,667 --> 00:05:27,207
You look like a little dork boy.
129
00:05:33,333 --> 00:05:34,713
Uh, excuse me. Uh...
130
00:05:35,041 --> 00:05:36,251
Ma'am, you dropped this.
131
00:05:36,333 --> 00:05:41,713
Excuse me, I'm Don Quinonas
from the TV show "What Did You Do?"
132
00:05:41,792 --> 00:05:43,212
That's my favorite show.
133
00:05:43,750 --> 00:05:45,750
This woman is an actress.
134
00:05:45,834 --> 00:05:49,754
And our hidden camera
just caught you giving her wallet back.
135
00:05:49,834 --> 00:05:51,294
It's really no big deal.
136
00:05:51,417 --> 00:05:53,207
Yeah, you heard him.
137
00:05:53,583 --> 00:05:54,633
It's not a big deal.
138
00:05:54,709 --> 00:05:56,459
Uh, did your camera catch me
helping the dork boy?
139
00:05:56,542 --> 00:05:58,502
Because that was a big deal.
140
00:05:59,417 --> 00:06:01,747
Excuse me, sir,
we're talking to a real hero.
141
00:06:03,709 --> 00:06:07,419
It's not every day we meet someone
with your kind heart.
142
00:06:07,542 --> 00:06:08,632
I'm a hero!
143
00:06:08,834 --> 00:06:10,384
A hero with a huge heart!
144
00:06:11,625 --> 00:06:12,955
Tell 'em, dork boy.
145
00:06:13,041 --> 00:06:14,131
Tell 'em I'm a hero!
146
00:06:14,709 --> 00:06:16,209
Rudy: I'm a hero!
147
00:06:16,291 --> 00:06:18,291
(upbeat music)
148
00:06:22,250 --> 00:06:24,210
Do you wanna hear a samurai haiku?
149
00:06:24,291 --> 00:06:27,131
Oh, 17 beautiful syllables
that say it all.
150
00:06:27,208 --> 00:06:29,208
As long as it's not about love.
151
00:06:29,709 --> 00:06:33,459
Every guy volunteer recites one to me
hoping that I'll go out with them.
152
00:06:33,750 --> 00:06:34,710
What's yours?
153
00:06:39,333 --> 00:06:42,383
Samurais have swords.
154
00:06:44,458 --> 00:06:47,498
Sharp, sharp, sharp,
sharp, sharp, sharp swords.
155
00:06:48,667 --> 00:06:49,707
This is the end.
156
00:06:50,083 --> 00:06:51,083
Swords.
157
00:06:52,667 --> 00:06:53,787
Hey, Chloe.
158
00:06:53,875 --> 00:06:56,125
Just stopped by to pick up
a volunteer application
159
00:06:56,208 --> 00:06:57,498
for the samurai wing.
160
00:06:57,709 --> 00:07:00,709
Jerry, you don't know anything
about samurais.
161
00:07:01,083 --> 00:07:03,003
Oh, really? Try me.
162
00:07:03,083 --> 00:07:04,833
Fact battle!
163
00:07:07,792 --> 00:07:10,132
Just, uh... cleaning the statues.
164
00:07:10,208 --> 00:07:11,878
Definitely not following Chloe around.
165
00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:14,416
That'd be creepy, right?
166
00:07:15,667 --> 00:07:18,497
I will not lower myself
to engage in a silly competition
167
00:07:18,583 --> 00:07:19,713
with this buffoon.
168
00:07:19,792 --> 00:07:23,212
I think intellectual competitions
are so manly.
169
00:07:23,291 --> 00:07:24,581
Let's battle, baby!
170
00:07:26,291 --> 00:07:28,501
(chuckles)
I love fact battles.
171
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,750
What is the name of the defense garment
worn on the back of a--
172
00:07:31,834 --> 00:07:33,384
- (buzzes)
- What is a horo ?
173
00:07:33,500 --> 00:07:36,040
It was invented by Hatakeyama Masanaga
174
00:07:36,125 --> 00:07:37,375
during the Onin war.
175
00:07:37,500 --> 00:07:39,080
Huh! Boo-yah!
176
00:07:40,709 --> 00:07:43,329
What's buried in Shogun Hashindo's tomb?
177
00:07:43,375 --> 00:07:44,875
- (buzzes)
- A golden sword.
178
00:07:44,959 --> 00:07:47,289
Oh! Ba-bam! Yeah.
179
00:07:48,500 --> 00:07:51,750
Ah! Hold on, now. I'm not done facting.
180
00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:54,130
Legend has it
that if the sword is removed,
181
00:07:54,208 --> 00:07:56,958
his royal guards
will come back to life to protect him.
182
00:07:58,000 --> 00:08:00,210
Nobody believes that gold sword stuff.
183
00:08:00,291 --> 00:08:01,751
Legends are dumb.
184
00:08:01,834 --> 00:08:03,964
Aren't you guys the Living Legends?
185
00:08:04,291 --> 00:08:05,921
Aren't you supposed to be
cleaning a statue
186
00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:08,210
and not creeping on Chloe?
187
00:08:09,583 --> 00:08:11,003
Touché, Mr. Franklin.
188
00:08:11,250 --> 00:08:12,380
Touché.
189
00:08:14,625 --> 00:08:17,575
Jerry, i misjudged you.
190
00:08:17,667 --> 00:08:20,707
You'll be working with me
as tour guide of this wing.
191
00:08:21,208 --> 00:08:23,498
Milton, you'll be with the Living Legends.
192
00:08:29,500 --> 00:08:31,830
Jerry, since when do you know things?
193
00:08:31,917 --> 00:08:33,667
I mean, I still tie your shoes.
194
00:08:34,125 --> 00:08:37,035
Well, when it comes
to getting a cute girl, I'll do anything.
195
00:08:37,125 --> 00:08:38,455
Even study history.
196
00:08:38,875 --> 00:08:40,665
Oh, that reminds me.
(clears throat)
197
00:08:40,834 --> 00:08:42,714
(scoffs)
Tie it yourself, Jerry.
198
00:08:42,792 --> 00:08:44,382
What? Fine.
199
00:08:44,875 --> 00:08:45,955
I don't need your help.
200
00:08:47,375 --> 00:08:48,705
I can tie my own shoe.
201
00:08:50,041 --> 00:08:51,581
(grunting)
202
00:08:52,166 --> 00:08:54,206
There, done.
203
00:08:56,000 --> 00:08:56,920
(grunts)
204
00:08:58,041 --> 00:08:59,331
Told you i could do it!
205
00:08:59,875 --> 00:09:01,875
(upbeat music)
206
00:09:05,166 --> 00:09:07,576
There you are.
207
00:09:09,291 --> 00:09:11,751
You little glory stealer.
208
00:09:12,208 --> 00:09:13,038
Yeah, oh, okay.
209
00:09:13,125 --> 00:09:15,075
So I picked up that wallet
so I could be on TV.
210
00:09:15,166 --> 00:09:17,286
(laughs)
So you admit it!
211
00:09:19,291 --> 00:09:22,081
Well, now it's my turn to be on TV.
212
00:09:22,417 --> 00:09:25,127
I hired an actress online
to play an old woman with a walker.
213
00:09:25,208 --> 00:09:27,168
She will struggle across the courtyard
214
00:09:27,250 --> 00:09:30,500
and I will heroically swoop in
and carry her to her destination.
215
00:09:30,583 --> 00:09:33,173
How do you know that Don Quinonas
and his crew are even still here?
216
00:09:33,500 --> 00:09:35,210
Let's just say a little birdie told me...
217
00:09:35,667 --> 00:09:37,537
to let all the air out of their tires.
218
00:09:39,875 --> 00:09:41,495
Oh, that must be her.
219
00:09:45,917 --> 00:09:46,877
Oh, no.
220
00:09:47,083 --> 00:09:50,383
This frail but sweet lady
appears to need help.
221
00:09:50,458 --> 00:09:54,038
I, Rudy Gillespie,
selfless, single sensei,
222
00:09:54,125 --> 00:09:56,125
will gladly help this wobbly walker.
223
00:09:57,041 --> 00:09:59,081
Hey, beat it, pal, she's mine.
224
00:10:00,959 --> 00:10:02,039
Allow me to assist.
225
00:10:03,583 --> 00:10:04,633
(whispers)
Get in my arms.
226
00:10:05,291 --> 00:10:07,171
I said, get in my arms. Come here.
227
00:10:07,250 --> 00:10:08,960
Ow. Ow. Hey.
228
00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:10,632
(clatters)
229
00:10:10,959 --> 00:10:13,169
Listen, you old biddy,
I'm trying to pick you up.
230
00:10:13,542 --> 00:10:15,132
- Come here! Come here!
- (whimpers)
231
00:10:15,959 --> 00:10:16,879
(yells)
232
00:10:21,417 --> 00:10:24,457
I'd like to say my show
brings out the best in people,
233
00:10:24,667 --> 00:10:27,577
but today, our cameras caught
the most heinous act
234
00:10:27,709 --> 00:10:29,879
of human cruelty ever.
235
00:10:30,333 --> 00:10:31,133
Huh?
236
00:10:33,792 --> 00:10:34,752
And... cut.
237
00:10:34,834 --> 00:10:36,674
(chuckles)
That was great. We'll air it tonight.
238
00:10:36,750 --> 00:10:39,750
No, Don, this is a misunderstanding.
239
00:10:41,458 --> 00:10:43,208
I'm looking for Rudy Gillespie.
240
00:10:43,291 --> 00:10:45,921
The guy that hired a stunt granny
so he could look good on TV.
241
00:10:46,000 --> 00:10:46,880
You're late!
242
00:10:46,959 --> 00:10:48,499
You made me look like a monster!
243
00:10:48,875 --> 00:10:50,375
- (growling)
- (thuds)
244
00:10:50,917 --> 00:10:52,957
(upbeat music)
245
00:10:54,959 --> 00:10:57,879
(both laughing)
246
00:10:58,667 --> 00:11:01,037
Hey, what are you guys laughing about?
247
00:11:01,125 --> 00:11:02,825
Something Jerry said.
248
00:11:02,917 --> 00:11:05,327
You had to be there.
(laughing)
249
00:11:05,417 --> 00:11:07,787
(cackling)
250
00:11:07,875 --> 00:11:09,325
But i wasn't.
251
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:13,080
Face it, Milton, she's not into you.
252
00:11:13,917 --> 00:11:15,077
She's into me.
253
00:11:15,583 --> 00:11:17,133
Oh, and I love hanging out with her.
254
00:11:17,208 --> 00:11:19,288
She's smart, she loves museums,
255
00:11:19,583 --> 00:11:21,753
oh, and she's got
the cutest little freckles.
256
00:11:22,875 --> 00:11:24,665
She's like a version of you I can kiss.
257
00:11:24,750 --> 00:11:26,290
- Oh, kiss this!
- (grunts)
258
00:11:27,917 --> 00:11:28,827
Oh...
259
00:11:30,542 --> 00:11:31,922
What did you two do?
260
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:35,130
That caveman skeleton is 75,000 years old.
261
00:11:35,208 --> 00:11:36,668
Oh! What a relief.
262
00:11:36,750 --> 00:11:38,080
At least we didn't break a new one.
263
00:11:39,750 --> 00:11:40,790
This is his fault.
264
00:11:40,875 --> 00:11:43,415
He's pretending to care about history
to get close to you.
265
00:11:43,500 --> 00:11:44,460
What?
266
00:11:45,417 --> 00:11:46,787
At least I'm man enough to ask her out.
267
00:11:46,875 --> 00:11:48,415
Oh, you don't think I'm man enough?
268
00:11:48,542 --> 00:11:49,922
I'll ask her out right now.
269
00:11:53,750 --> 00:11:55,420
Samurais have swords.
270
00:11:55,500 --> 00:11:57,040
- Sharp, sharp, sharp...
- That's it!
271
00:11:57,125 --> 00:11:58,625
Both of you should leave.
272
00:11:58,959 --> 00:12:01,709
I'm gonna be here all night
trying to get this hand just right.
273
00:12:01,792 --> 00:12:03,212
Oh, come on, Chloe.
274
00:12:03,291 --> 00:12:04,921
You're not gonna be here all night.
275
00:12:05,250 --> 00:12:06,380
It's just a hand.
276
00:12:06,750 --> 00:12:08,790
Look, all you have to do
is put the hand back...
277
00:12:08,875 --> 00:12:10,745
(clattering)
278
00:12:14,500 --> 00:12:16,500
Yeah, you're gonna be here all night.
(clears throat)
279
00:12:17,458 --> 00:12:19,458
(upbeat music)
280
00:12:25,083 --> 00:12:27,173
I can't believe you got us
fired from the museum.
281
00:12:27,250 --> 00:12:30,040
- You ruin everything.
- That is so not true.
282
00:12:30,125 --> 00:12:33,495
At my last birthday,
you mistook my grandma for a piñata.
283
00:12:34,375 --> 00:12:37,125
No one was complaining
when candy started dropping out of her.
284
00:12:37,667 --> 00:12:41,377
I just realized Chloe is stuck
in the museum, cleaning up our mess.
285
00:12:41,667 --> 00:12:44,417
I'm gonna text Sydney and he and I
are gonna help her clean up.
286
00:12:44,625 --> 00:12:47,245
Yeah, Sydney's
never stabbed me in the back.
287
00:12:47,750 --> 00:12:48,790
You know what, Milton?
288
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:51,330
If Chloe's the girl of your dreams...
289
00:12:51,917 --> 00:12:54,577
then as your friend, I respect that...
290
00:12:55,250 --> 00:12:56,290
And I'll back off.
291
00:12:57,333 --> 00:12:58,633
Wow, Jerry, that...
292
00:12:59,125 --> 00:13:00,165
That means a lot.
293
00:13:00,834 --> 00:13:02,544
- Thanks for understanding.
- Yeah, man.
294
00:13:03,458 --> 00:13:04,828
Uh, where are you going?
295
00:13:04,917 --> 00:13:07,707
To the museum to make the girl
of your dreams my girlfriend.
296
00:13:07,834 --> 00:13:09,134
- Jerry: Whoo!
- (screams)
297
00:13:09,208 --> 00:13:11,208
(upbeat music)
298
00:13:13,667 --> 00:13:16,287
And maybe I'll start with a salad.
299
00:13:18,291 --> 00:13:19,881
See the attitude on her?
300
00:13:20,291 --> 00:13:23,081
You know, you're shown on tv
beating up one defenseless, old lady
301
00:13:23,166 --> 00:13:25,956
and suddenly the whole world
thinks you're a jerk.
302
00:13:26,041 --> 00:13:28,171
Come on, Rudy, you're exaggerating.
303
00:13:31,917 --> 00:13:33,077
I don't think i am.
304
00:13:34,333 --> 00:13:35,713
At least she left off the dressing.
305
00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:41,210
Uh, excuse me, waitress.
306
00:13:41,834 --> 00:13:44,634
May I have some fresh pepper
for my lap salad?
307
00:13:48,166 --> 00:13:49,206
Little more.
308
00:13:51,208 --> 00:13:52,168
Thank you.
309
00:13:57,083 --> 00:13:59,583
Oh, there's the worst man in the world.
310
00:13:59,667 --> 00:14:01,957
Quick, everyone, hide your grannies.
(chuckles)
311
00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:04,791
It was a man-granny I ordered online.
312
00:14:06,750 --> 00:14:07,670
Making it worse, Rudy.
313
00:14:07,750 --> 00:14:09,290
Apparently that's what I do.
314
00:14:09,375 --> 00:14:11,285
(laughing)
315
00:14:11,875 --> 00:14:12,875
Look at him over there.
316
00:14:12,959 --> 00:14:15,419
He ruins my life
and then he just laughs at me.
317
00:14:15,500 --> 00:14:17,000
I am so angry.
318
00:14:18,375 --> 00:14:21,205
It's a good thing I've devoted my life
to the study of martial arts.
319
00:14:21,291 --> 00:14:23,041
Oh, great,
so you're gonna tap into your chi
320
00:14:23,125 --> 00:14:24,325
and overcome your anger?
321
00:14:24,417 --> 00:14:25,417
Something like that.
322
00:14:26,375 --> 00:14:28,205
(screaming)
323
00:14:28,375 --> 00:14:29,535
(grunts)
324
00:14:29,709 --> 00:14:32,459
(crying)
325
00:14:33,458 --> 00:14:35,458
(upbeat music)
326
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:47,290
Once we get the golden sword
from Hashindo's sarcophagus,
327
00:14:47,375 --> 00:14:49,375
- sell it for $80,000,
- Yeah...
328
00:14:49,458 --> 00:14:50,748
and take out expenses.
329
00:14:51,375 --> 00:14:52,875
How much do you think each of us will get?
330
00:14:52,959 --> 00:14:55,079
(stammers)
Don't look at me.
331
00:14:55,166 --> 00:14:56,746
Math is not really my thing.
332
00:14:57,125 --> 00:14:59,375
How can math not be your thing?
You're Albert Einstein!
333
00:14:59,458 --> 00:15:01,788
I got the gig because of my hair!
334
00:15:02,125 --> 00:15:03,705
And you know that, Carl!
335
00:15:07,667 --> 00:15:09,127
Oh, I can't believe it.
336
00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:11,248
The Living Legends
are just a bunch of thieves.
337
00:15:11,875 --> 00:15:13,665
Both: And they've got my girlfriend.
338
00:15:13,792 --> 00:15:15,002
Your girlfriend?
339
00:15:15,083 --> 00:15:17,543
Yeah. Stop it. No, you stop it.
340
00:15:20,166 --> 00:15:22,076
We need a plan. Stop it!
341
00:15:22,291 --> 00:15:24,211
(upbeat music)
342
00:15:25,166 --> 00:15:28,286
All: We hate Rudy. We hate Rudy...
343
00:15:36,417 --> 00:15:38,577
Uh, excuse me, ma'am.
I'm sorry, we're closed.
344
00:15:39,166 --> 00:15:40,036
It's me.
345
00:15:41,959 --> 00:15:44,879
This is the only way I could get through
that mob of angry grannies
346
00:15:44,959 --> 00:15:46,379
after what I did to their friend Ethel.
347
00:15:46,458 --> 00:15:48,458
Yeah, this is my life now, Jack.
348
00:15:48,542 --> 00:15:51,582
Dinner at four, bingo at five,
gotta watch the grandkids at eight.
349
00:15:51,667 --> 00:15:52,577
And don't even ask me why,
350
00:15:52,667 --> 00:15:54,537
but i got a pocket
full of butterscotch candies.
351
00:15:56,750 --> 00:15:58,830
Oh... here it is, Rudy,
your new episode's on.
352
00:15:59,583 --> 00:16:02,583
(sighs)
I can't watch this.
353
00:16:05,667 --> 00:16:06,707
That's better.
354
00:16:07,291 --> 00:16:10,831
Last night,
we introduced you to Rudy Gillespie,
355
00:16:10,917 --> 00:16:12,667
"The worst man In the world."
356
00:16:14,375 --> 00:16:17,785
Well, guess what?
On tonight's episode, he's back,
357
00:16:18,125 --> 00:16:21,035
and what you're about to see
will shock you.
358
00:16:21,542 --> 00:16:22,632
Here we go.
359
00:16:22,875 --> 00:16:24,455
My life is over.
360
00:16:24,542 --> 00:16:26,792
(screaming)
361
00:16:26,875 --> 00:16:27,705
(grunts)
362
00:16:27,792 --> 00:16:30,252
(crying)
363
00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:33,671
(gasping)
364
00:16:34,625 --> 00:16:36,915
A falafel ball went down the wrong pipe!
365
00:16:37,166 --> 00:16:39,076
Rudy Gillespie just saved my life!
366
00:16:39,792 --> 00:16:41,042
- She did?
- I did?
367
00:16:41,458 --> 00:16:42,668
He's a hero.
368
00:16:43,041 --> 00:16:44,251
- She is?
- I am?
369
00:16:45,208 --> 00:16:49,918
America, Rudy punched my gut
and touched my heart.
370
00:16:52,041 --> 00:16:53,501
Did you see what I did, Jack?
371
00:16:54,041 --> 00:16:55,171
I don't believe it!
372
00:16:55,625 --> 00:16:56,785
I'm a hero!
373
00:16:58,291 --> 00:16:59,671
Hey, Rudy, where are you going?
374
00:16:59,750 --> 00:17:02,790
To tell those cane-wielding prune suckers
that they owe me an apology.
375
00:17:02,875 --> 00:17:04,245
No, wait, Rudy, you're forgetting...
376
00:17:04,333 --> 00:17:06,383
they couldn't have seen the new episode.
377
00:17:06,458 --> 00:17:07,788
All: Get him!
378
00:17:10,834 --> 00:17:12,584
They didn't see the episode!
379
00:17:14,500 --> 00:17:16,290
(groaning)
380
00:17:17,792 --> 00:17:19,792
(foreboding music)
381
00:17:22,917 --> 00:17:23,787
Hey!
382
00:17:24,208 --> 00:17:25,378
We know why you're here.
383
00:17:25,500 --> 00:17:27,210
You're nothing but a bunch of thieves.
384
00:17:27,375 --> 00:17:28,285
Both: Yeah...
385
00:17:28,875 --> 00:17:30,165
And horrible actors.
386
00:17:30,250 --> 00:17:31,130
(both gasp)
387
00:17:31,208 --> 00:17:33,538
That's it. Tie 'em up, guys.
388
00:17:36,166 --> 00:17:37,746
I'll take the small chick.
389
00:17:40,959 --> 00:17:42,539
- (grunts)
- (gasps)
390
00:17:43,041 --> 00:17:44,381
(thwacks)
391
00:17:44,458 --> 00:17:46,878
(all grunting)
392
00:17:49,709 --> 00:17:52,629
This might not be the best time
but who are you going to prom with?
393
00:17:54,000 --> 00:17:55,460
Not a good time? All right, gotta go.
394
00:17:56,542 --> 00:17:58,382
- (groaning)
- (grunting)
395
00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:03,626
You can't see this,
but that gag really makes your eyes pop.
396
00:18:04,750 --> 00:18:07,580
(all grunting)
397
00:18:11,375 --> 00:18:13,915
(grunting continues)
398
00:18:29,959 --> 00:18:32,129
(pants)
I call the big dude next time.
399
00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:36,500
(door creaking)
400
00:18:43,583 --> 00:18:44,963
Oh.
(giggles)
401
00:18:45,083 --> 00:18:47,463
Yes, this is fantastisch.
402
00:18:51,458 --> 00:18:54,248
Did... did anybody else see that?
403
00:18:54,750 --> 00:18:55,790
I did.
404
00:18:56,291 --> 00:18:58,291
The samurai warriors
have come back to life.
405
00:18:58,542 --> 00:19:00,582
It's the legend of Hashindo's sword.
406
00:19:00,709 --> 00:19:03,829
Really? You think I'm buying
some absurd legend...
407
00:19:06,375 --> 00:19:07,915
Okay, I'm buying. I'm buying.
408
00:19:08,583 --> 00:19:10,253
(roars)
409
00:19:10,333 --> 00:19:12,463
Put back the sword, Carl!
410
00:19:12,542 --> 00:19:13,542
No!
411
00:19:14,083 --> 00:19:15,543
I'm not giving it back.
412
00:19:15,625 --> 00:19:16,535
It's mine.
413
00:19:16,625 --> 00:19:18,625
Fine, keep it.
414
00:19:20,375 --> 00:19:22,205
(groaning)
415
00:19:30,291 --> 00:19:32,381
Can someone explain what just happened?
416
00:19:32,542 --> 00:19:34,292
We made them believe the legend was real.
417
00:19:34,417 --> 00:19:35,417
Sydney: No...
418
00:19:36,458 --> 00:19:38,288
I made him believe the legend was real.
419
00:19:39,083 --> 00:19:41,583
How did you produce that demonic roar?
420
00:19:41,667 --> 00:19:43,287
The armor yanked out my only pit hair,
421
00:19:43,542 --> 00:19:44,632
but it was worth it.
422
00:19:46,083 --> 00:19:47,793
Teddy, go call the cops.
423
00:19:48,750 --> 00:19:50,790
What you did was incredible.
424
00:19:51,375 --> 00:19:52,625
You saved me.
425
00:19:52,834 --> 00:19:55,084
Both: Aw, it was really nothing.
426
00:19:55,166 --> 00:19:56,576
Seriously, stop it.
427
00:19:58,375 --> 00:20:00,125
There's something you two should know.
428
00:20:00,458 --> 00:20:01,918
Oh, I know what it is.
429
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:04,500
In the beginning, you thought we were
more trouble than we were worth
430
00:20:04,583 --> 00:20:06,583
because we destroyed
the caveman skeletons.
431
00:20:06,667 --> 00:20:09,247
But when we came here,
foiled a robbery, and saved you
432
00:20:09,291 --> 00:20:12,041
and the museum,
we totally redeemed ourselves.
433
00:20:12,458 --> 00:20:13,378
No.
434
00:20:14,125 --> 00:20:15,625
Sydney's my new boyfriend.
435
00:20:17,166 --> 00:20:19,376
All: I did not see that coming.
436
00:20:19,959 --> 00:20:20,879
Wha...
437
00:20:23,000 --> 00:20:24,040
(both gasp)
438
00:20:24,750 --> 00:20:25,670
(sighs)
439
00:20:25,750 --> 00:20:26,630
Milton,
440
00:20:27,417 --> 00:20:29,287
dude, I'm sorry
I tried to take your girl...
441
00:20:29,792 --> 00:20:32,042
and for all the future girls
I'm gonna try and take from you.
442
00:20:33,083 --> 00:20:34,463
I'm sorry, too.
443
00:20:35,041 --> 00:20:37,001
And don't worry,
Chloe's not gonna have time
444
00:20:37,083 --> 00:20:38,503
for a date with Sydney, anyway.
445
00:20:39,125 --> 00:20:39,995
She's not?
446
00:20:40,917 --> 00:20:43,537
(snaps, clattering)
447
00:20:43,959 --> 00:20:46,209
Both: Oh, Chloe!
448
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:48,130
Whoo!
449
00:20:50,875 --> 00:20:52,705
♪ Kickin' it with you! ♪
450
00:20:52,875 --> 00:20:55,535
The business you generate for the museum
as the new Living Legends
451
00:20:55,625 --> 00:20:57,495
will help pay for the damage you caused.
452
00:20:58,041 --> 00:20:59,251
(sighs)
453
00:21:00,125 --> 00:21:03,285
(chuckling)
Nerds.
454
00:21:06,709 --> 00:21:08,629
(bell tolls)
I am Paul Revere
455
00:21:08,709 --> 00:21:10,079
and the Living Legends are coming!
456
00:21:10,166 --> 00:21:11,706
The living legends are coming...
457
00:21:12,375 --> 00:21:14,625
to the Seaford Museum Of History.
458
00:21:15,667 --> 00:21:16,997
(gasps)
459
00:21:17,083 --> 00:21:18,133
Are we done yet?
460
00:21:18,208 --> 00:21:19,828
We've been doing this for four hours.
461
00:21:19,917 --> 00:21:22,377
Yeah, and we have four more.
So put your head back on.
462
00:21:22,709 --> 00:21:23,709
Hyah!
463
00:21:23,792 --> 00:21:25,672
(yelps)
That's it.
464
00:21:25,917 --> 00:21:27,537
(both grunting)
465
00:21:27,917 --> 00:21:30,627
Bad horsey, bad horsey, bad horsey!
466
00:21:32,875 --> 00:21:34,915
(closing theme music)
467
00:21:57,041 --> 00:21:57,881
Man: Poor soul.
468
00:21:57,959 --> 00:21:58,999
(dog snarls, barks)
469
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:02,830
Boy: Yes!
33259
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