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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,125 --> 00:00:06,745 Oh, man. I'll tell you, temple-sitting is the life. 2 00:00:06,834 --> 00:00:07,884 Just look at that view. 3 00:00:09,458 --> 00:00:14,878 -That is 3 -D hi-def surround sound with quadratronic woofers, baby. 4 00:00:15,750 --> 00:00:17,420 Oh. Hey, Jack, we should go get our tickets 5 00:00:17,500 --> 00:00:19,040 for our movie tomorrow before they sell out. 6 00:00:19,125 --> 00:00:20,325 Oh, sweet, I'm in. 7 00:00:21,041 --> 00:00:22,881 Uh, Jerry. It's kind of a date. 8 00:00:22,959 --> 00:00:23,959 Oh, sorry, Jack. 9 00:00:24,041 --> 00:00:26,171 Looks like Kim and I are going on a date. (clicks tongue) 10 00:00:27,667 --> 00:00:29,247 No. I'm going on a date with Jack. 11 00:00:29,333 --> 00:00:31,423 (groans) Make up your mind, woman. 12 00:00:35,917 --> 00:00:38,327 Whoa, we thought the temple was empty. 13 00:00:38,750 --> 00:00:39,790 Who are you people? 14 00:00:39,875 --> 00:00:41,915 We're temple-sitting for the warriors. Who are you people? 15 00:00:42,041 --> 00:00:43,131 We're plumbers. 16 00:00:43,208 --> 00:00:44,498 We're here to fix the plumbing. 17 00:00:44,917 --> 00:00:46,747 Uh, it's probably my fault. 18 00:00:46,834 --> 00:00:49,044 I just started my new all-fiber diet. 19 00:00:49,458 --> 00:00:50,628 And it has been a-- 20 00:00:50,709 --> 00:00:51,539 Rudy! 21 00:00:53,417 --> 00:00:55,667 Ooh! Shark pool comes on in a couple minutes. 22 00:00:55,750 --> 00:00:57,040 Oh, I love that show. 23 00:00:57,667 --> 00:01:01,037 Innocent dreamers present their inventions to four millionaires 24 00:01:01,125 --> 00:01:04,285 who crush their spirit and rob them of their will to live! 25 00:01:05,166 --> 00:01:06,456 I wanna be on it so bad. 26 00:01:08,250 --> 00:01:10,540 Can't get this stupid bottle open. 27 00:01:11,709 --> 00:01:12,579 Oh, I got it. 28 00:01:19,625 --> 00:01:20,535 How'd you do that? 29 00:01:20,625 --> 00:01:21,785 Oh, I used my stomach. 30 00:01:22,208 --> 00:01:23,418 I got really tight abs. 31 00:01:25,041 --> 00:01:27,581 How did you get tight abs working out at my dojo? 32 00:01:28,667 --> 00:01:29,917 Oh, sparring with Jack. 33 00:01:30,333 --> 00:01:32,133 You know, I've gotten so used to his stomach blows 34 00:01:32,208 --> 00:01:33,828 that my abs tighten up before he even hits me. 35 00:01:34,542 --> 00:01:36,132 Oh, that is it! 36 00:01:37,750 --> 00:01:40,830 What if I make a belt that you wear that simulates little karate chops 37 00:01:40,917 --> 00:01:44,327 making you tighten up and giving you a beautiful toned stomach. 38 00:01:44,959 --> 00:01:47,959 Oh! I will call it Ninja Abs! 39 00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:51,130 That's a really good idea, Rudy. 40 00:01:51,208 --> 00:01:52,628 - Yeah. - Thank you. 41 00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:55,791 - (whale moans on TV) - You know, 42 00:01:55,875 --> 00:01:58,035 the picture on that TV is pretty amazing. 43 00:01:58,166 --> 00:01:59,666 It's so realistic. 44 00:02:00,083 --> 00:02:03,463 I literally feel like that whale is giving birth in my lap. 45 00:02:04,041 --> 00:02:04,881 Eww! 46 00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:07,043 Dude, is that what we're watching? 47 00:02:07,542 --> 00:02:10,332 Ah, I thought the little one was just balancing the big one on his nose. 48 00:02:13,166 --> 00:02:14,956 - (water splashes) - All: Oh! 49 00:02:16,625 --> 00:02:18,075 - (chuckles) - Okay. 50 00:02:19,875 --> 00:02:22,995 ♪ Don't you get all tough with me ♪ 51 00:02:23,083 --> 00:02:26,923 ♪ I'm saying won't you Come kick it with me? ♪ 52 00:02:27,000 --> 00:02:29,580 ♪ And we could have a ball Run up the wall ♪ 53 00:02:29,667 --> 00:02:31,537 ♪ That's just how we do ♪ 54 00:02:31,625 --> 00:02:33,625 ♪ And no matter how much I chop and punch ♪ 55 00:02:33,709 --> 00:02:36,539 ♪ It's not as cool As kickin' it with you ♪ 56 00:02:36,625 --> 00:02:38,285 ♪ Here we go, let's start the party ♪ 57 00:02:38,375 --> 00:02:40,205 ♪ Chop it up like it's karate ♪ 58 00:02:40,291 --> 00:02:41,581 ♪ Everybody ♪ 59 00:02:41,667 --> 00:02:44,997 ♪ Don't you get all tough with me ♪ 60 00:02:45,083 --> 00:02:49,133 ♪ I'm saying won't you Come kick it with me? ♪ 61 00:02:49,208 --> 00:02:51,788 ♪ And we could have a ball Run up the wall ♪ 62 00:02:51,875 --> 00:02:53,455 ♪ That's just how we do ♪ 63 00:02:53,542 --> 00:02:55,462 ♪ And no matter how much I chop and punch ♪ 64 00:02:55,542 --> 00:02:58,382 ♪ It's not as cool As kickin' it with you ♪ 65 00:03:04,542 --> 00:03:07,332 And with a $5,000 loan from you, 66 00:03:07,417 --> 00:03:11,037 we'll be able to mass-produce these belts and do a live infomercial 67 00:03:11,166 --> 00:03:12,916 to cash in on the fitness craze. 68 00:03:13,875 --> 00:03:14,825 How 'bout it, Lou? 69 00:03:14,917 --> 00:03:17,787 Are you man of vision, spirit and verve? 70 00:03:18,291 --> 00:03:20,831 I can't see without my glasses, 71 00:03:20,917 --> 00:03:26,287 wife killed my spirit and I lost my verve to a wolverine on a camping trip. 72 00:03:28,583 --> 00:03:30,923 Listen, you, I told you to fix that toilet upstairs. 73 00:03:31,000 --> 00:03:32,170 Oh, boy. 74 00:03:32,583 --> 00:03:34,383 - (cash register dings) - Margot, what are you doing? 75 00:03:34,458 --> 00:03:38,498 I'm taking $20 to get my nails done. Eww. 76 00:03:40,583 --> 00:03:42,253 Come on, Margot. I'll drop you at the mall. 77 00:03:42,333 --> 00:03:43,883 Can't believe those two. 78 00:03:43,959 --> 00:03:46,039 - What was that? - I said have a nice day! 79 00:03:49,417 --> 00:03:51,877 Okay, I'll give you the loan, 80 00:03:51,959 --> 00:03:55,039 but if you can't pay it back, I get to keep your dojo. 81 00:03:55,125 --> 00:03:55,955 (sputters) 82 00:03:56,041 --> 00:03:57,081 - Not happening. - He would never-- 83 00:03:57,166 --> 00:03:58,326 - It's a deal. - What? 84 00:03:59,709 --> 00:04:01,709 Rudy, you can't risk the dojo. 85 00:04:01,792 --> 00:04:04,962 What? If you believe in yourself, you gotta bet on yourself. 86 00:04:06,333 --> 00:04:08,673 Ohh, I remember this thing. 87 00:04:09,041 --> 00:04:10,211 Yeah, the last time we were here, 88 00:04:10,291 --> 00:04:11,881 I thought it was a fake and I pulled this-- 89 00:04:11,959 --> 00:04:13,129 (blasts) 90 00:04:15,250 --> 00:04:16,500 And that's exactly what happened. 91 00:04:16,583 --> 00:04:17,463 We'll see you, Lou. 92 00:04:18,875 --> 00:04:21,665 ♪ It's not as cool As kickin' it with you! ♪ 93 00:04:21,750 --> 00:04:22,960 That movie was a joke. 94 00:04:23,041 --> 00:04:24,331 - Yeah. - We were supposed to believe 95 00:04:24,417 --> 00:04:27,167 that a German soldier stopped the war with nothing but his ballet shoes? 96 00:04:27,583 --> 00:04:29,333 (in German accent) Put down your weapons, guys, 97 00:04:29,417 --> 00:04:31,037 and watch me dance! 98 00:04:32,709 --> 00:04:34,539 (in normal accent) Let's go get some frozen yogurt. 99 00:04:34,625 --> 00:04:36,535 Ugh, Karl's working. 100 00:04:36,959 --> 00:04:38,129 He hates everyone. 101 00:04:40,542 --> 00:04:42,292 (groans) Kim. 102 00:04:42,959 --> 00:04:44,499 (mocking groan) Karl! 103 00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:47,830 How you doin', Karl? I'm Jack. 104 00:04:47,917 --> 00:04:49,497 Uh, can I get a raspberry ginger? 105 00:04:49,917 --> 00:04:51,127 You got it, Jack. 106 00:04:52,375 --> 00:04:53,325 On the house. 107 00:04:53,792 --> 00:04:54,752 Oh, thanks, man. 108 00:04:55,458 --> 00:04:56,788 Let me see. I'll have an-- 109 00:04:56,875 --> 00:04:58,075 - (cover shuts) - We're closed. 110 00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:03,540 Why does everyone love you? 111 00:05:04,125 --> 00:05:05,705 It's called the Jack factor. 112 00:05:05,792 --> 00:05:08,672 It's charm, charisma and all this. 113 00:05:10,667 --> 00:05:13,207 Look, Jack, now that we're going out, 114 00:05:13,291 --> 00:05:15,251 my, uh, dad wants to meet you and... 115 00:05:15,333 --> 00:05:17,253 - I tried to get out of it, and I just-- - Kim, relax. 116 00:05:17,417 --> 00:05:18,627 I can't wait to meet him. 117 00:05:18,709 --> 00:05:21,079 Parents love me. It's part of the Jack factor. 118 00:05:21,875 --> 00:05:24,165 You really think you have something called the Jack factor? 119 00:05:26,083 --> 00:05:27,213 Hey, where'd you get that? 120 00:05:29,291 --> 00:05:30,251 (clicks tongue) 121 00:05:31,583 --> 00:05:33,583 Unbelievable. 122 00:05:33,709 --> 00:05:35,039 No, give me that! 123 00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:43,710 Rudy: And now it's time for Ninja Abs! 124 00:05:43,792 --> 00:05:47,252 And here's your handsome host Rudy! 125 00:05:47,709 --> 00:05:49,079 Thanks, Steve-O. 126 00:05:50,583 --> 00:05:52,213 Hey, everyone. I'm Rudy. 127 00:05:52,250 --> 00:05:54,460 Do you have some extra weight you'd like to lose? 128 00:05:54,542 --> 00:05:55,792 Well, I did. 129 00:05:55,875 --> 00:06:00,535 And now I can help you become big loser just like me. 130 00:06:02,667 --> 00:06:03,917 Listen to this fella. 131 00:06:05,333 --> 00:06:06,673 Jerry: I used to look like this. 132 00:06:07,291 --> 00:06:08,211 (grunts) 133 00:06:08,542 --> 00:06:10,832 Thanks to Ninja Abs, now, I look like this. 134 00:06:10,917 --> 00:06:11,917 Whoo! 135 00:06:13,333 --> 00:06:16,173 Yeah, my abs are so ripped, I can do fun things like this. 136 00:06:19,458 --> 00:06:22,248 Wow! That's real parmesan cheese, people! 137 00:06:24,917 --> 00:06:26,997 Mmm! Ab-sy! 138 00:06:28,875 --> 00:06:32,665 Now let my friend Dr. Krupnick explain how it works. 139 00:06:32,750 --> 00:06:34,420 It works because of science. 140 00:06:35,500 --> 00:06:37,710 Now, let's see it in action. 141 00:06:37,792 --> 00:06:38,752 (beeping) 142 00:06:38,834 --> 00:06:40,004 - (whirring) - Ohh! 143 00:06:40,083 --> 00:06:42,173 Each ninja belt is custom designed 144 00:06:42,250 --> 00:06:45,460 with six powerful pistons to pound the pounds away! 145 00:06:45,750 --> 00:06:46,580 Let's turn it up. 146 00:06:46,667 --> 00:06:47,917 (rapid beeping) 147 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:49,330 (whirring rapidly) 148 00:06:50,667 --> 00:06:52,127 Hey, let's, uh... 149 00:06:52,208 --> 00:06:54,078 Show 'em how the off button works, Rudy. 150 00:06:54,875 --> 00:06:56,375 That smile means it's working. 151 00:06:56,458 --> 00:06:57,578 You need to turn it off, Rudy! 152 00:06:57,625 --> 00:06:59,205 - It's not going down. - Turn it off, Rudy. 153 00:06:59,291 --> 00:07:00,751 I can't turn this down. It's not working. 154 00:07:01,375 --> 00:07:02,245 (nervous chuckle) 155 00:07:06,875 --> 00:07:08,205 - (bodies thud) - Order yours today! 156 00:07:08,250 --> 00:07:09,880 - (boys screaming) - You'll be glad you did! 157 00:07:09,959 --> 00:07:12,539 - (sparking, zapping) - (Jerry screams) 158 00:07:12,625 --> 00:07:13,455 (gasps) 159 00:07:15,250 --> 00:07:16,630 ♪ Kickin' it with you! ♪ 160 00:07:18,458 --> 00:07:19,998 - Hey, guys. - (Chuck chuckling) 161 00:07:20,083 --> 00:07:22,083 Oh, uh, Jack, this is my dad. 162 00:07:22,166 --> 00:07:23,576 Dad, this is my... 163 00:07:24,125 --> 00:07:25,035 Jack. 164 00:07:26,083 --> 00:07:28,083 Nice to meet you. Should I call you chuck? 165 00:07:28,166 --> 00:07:29,496 Mr. Crawford would be fine. 166 00:07:31,250 --> 00:07:33,500 Yeah. Yes, sir. Mr. Crawford, sir. 167 00:07:33,875 --> 00:07:36,785 So, uh, I hear you're in automotive supplies, huh? 168 00:07:36,875 --> 00:07:39,785 Well, maybe I can get a muffler for this one when she gets all yappy, 169 00:07:39,875 --> 00:07:44,825 'cause once she gets goin', she's like, blah, blah, blah. 170 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:49,250 Hey, Jack, tell dad the joke you told me. 171 00:07:49,667 --> 00:07:50,667 Let's hear it, Jack. 172 00:07:51,083 --> 00:07:52,133 I love jokes. 173 00:07:54,333 --> 00:07:56,133 Where do penguins keep their money? 174 00:07:56,208 --> 00:07:57,208 In a snowbank. 175 00:07:58,208 --> 00:08:00,168 Oh, you heard this one. (chuckles) 176 00:08:00,250 --> 00:08:01,130 Up top. 177 00:08:01,792 --> 00:08:04,882 Many species of penguin are endangered, Jack. 178 00:08:05,375 --> 00:08:06,415 You think that's funny? 179 00:08:07,750 --> 00:08:09,710 This isn't one of those laughing jokes. 180 00:08:09,834 --> 00:08:11,004 It's more of a... 181 00:08:11,500 --> 00:08:14,170 raise penguin awareness kind of a joke. 182 00:08:18,667 --> 00:08:19,787 Why don't we order? 183 00:08:19,875 --> 00:08:20,745 Oh! 184 00:08:22,375 --> 00:08:23,665 You just spilled water in my lap. 185 00:08:23,750 --> 00:08:24,920 I'm so sorry! 186 00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:25,790 Don't! 187 00:08:36,041 --> 00:08:37,791 Hey, Lou! Lookin' good. 188 00:08:37,875 --> 00:08:39,495 I saw your infomercial. 189 00:08:39,583 --> 00:08:41,083 I want my money back. 190 00:08:41,166 --> 00:08:45,666 And if you can't pay, our deal clearly states I get your dojo. 191 00:08:45,750 --> 00:08:47,580 But I don't want you to own my dojo. 192 00:08:47,667 --> 00:08:49,577 (whiny) I wanna own my dojo! 193 00:08:50,333 --> 00:08:51,883 Oh, I got us into this mess. 194 00:08:52,208 --> 00:08:53,578 Curse my beautiful abs. 195 00:08:55,625 --> 00:08:57,165 There you are, you little worm! 196 00:08:57,250 --> 00:08:59,040 Ah, there's the sunshine of my life. 197 00:09:00,959 --> 00:09:02,129 Way to go, daddy. 198 00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:06,665 You didn't book our trip to the glorious Xanadu Spa and Resort on Maui-Maui. 199 00:09:06,750 --> 00:09:09,250 I was going to run with the dolphins. 200 00:09:09,834 --> 00:09:10,964 Dolphins swim, dear. 201 00:09:11,041 --> 00:09:12,961 I was going to swim with the dolphins. 202 00:09:13,709 --> 00:09:16,209 Once again, you ruined a family vacation. 203 00:09:16,834 --> 00:09:17,794 Uh... 204 00:09:17,875 --> 00:09:21,415 You know, Lou had a very good reason for not booking that trip. 205 00:09:21,500 --> 00:09:23,330 - Girls, Milton and Jerry: He did? - I did? 206 00:09:23,792 --> 00:09:24,712 You did. 207 00:09:25,083 --> 00:09:26,213 Yeah, um... 208 00:09:26,291 --> 00:09:30,041 He, he wanted to surprise you with a luxury vacation 209 00:09:30,125 --> 00:09:32,575 at the most exclusive spa in the world, 210 00:09:32,667 --> 00:09:35,787 located high atop the majestic mount Seaford. 211 00:09:36,291 --> 00:09:38,381 What kinda place are we going to, daddy? 212 00:09:40,792 --> 00:09:44,462 Welcome to Seaford Shaolin Resorts. 213 00:09:45,500 --> 00:09:46,710 Oh, bag boy! 214 00:09:46,792 --> 00:09:48,332 Oh, bag boy! 215 00:09:49,083 --> 00:09:51,583 Oh, bag... I'm the bag boy, aren't I? 216 00:09:59,041 --> 00:10:00,081 Yes. 217 00:10:03,667 --> 00:10:04,707 You forgot one. 218 00:10:05,375 --> 00:10:06,875 - (thuds) - (Milton groans) 219 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:08,830 Follow me, ladies. 220 00:10:08,917 --> 00:10:10,787 Your rooms are right across from the koi pond. 221 00:10:11,291 --> 00:10:13,541 Girls: Ooh, classy! 222 00:10:16,583 --> 00:10:19,673 If you could keep those two happy for the next couple of days, 223 00:10:19,750 --> 00:10:20,830 I'll forgive your loan. 224 00:10:21,417 --> 00:10:25,287 Trust me, your wife and daughter will have a vacation they'll never forget. 225 00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:28,543 Oh, soon we're gonna bust through this rock 226 00:10:28,625 --> 00:10:30,995 into the shaolin treasure chamber. 227 00:10:31,375 --> 00:10:34,705 And if that guy Rudy or anyone else tries to get in our way... 228 00:10:35,417 --> 00:10:36,577 (grunts) 229 00:10:37,583 --> 00:10:39,833 We'll take care of 'em. (cackles) 230 00:10:45,792 --> 00:10:47,212 Look at me! 231 00:10:47,291 --> 00:10:49,001 Lying in a tub of mud. 232 00:10:49,792 --> 00:10:52,082 I feel like one classy pig. 233 00:10:53,208 --> 00:10:54,708 What's this mud made out of? 234 00:10:55,500 --> 00:10:56,540 Uh... 235 00:10:57,166 --> 00:10:59,536 You see, the complete recipe is a secret, but I will tell you, 236 00:10:59,625 --> 00:11:03,165 the main ingredients are mineral water and cleansing volcanic ash. 237 00:11:03,583 --> 00:11:06,633 Girls: Ooh! Fancy! 238 00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:10,540 Where'd you get volcanic ash? 239 00:11:10,625 --> 00:11:12,285 (snickers) No, I didn't. 240 00:11:12,375 --> 00:11:14,575 I just scooped a bunch of stuff out of the bottom of a barbecue 241 00:11:14,667 --> 00:11:17,917 and mixed it with a bag of something called gro-u-t. 242 00:11:19,041 --> 00:11:20,671 Uh, excuse me? 243 00:11:21,208 --> 00:11:23,208 I think I found a rib bone. 244 00:11:25,041 --> 00:11:28,001 Uh... Yeah! Yeah, that's... 245 00:11:28,083 --> 00:11:29,963 That's what the mud does, dear. It, um, uh... 246 00:11:30,041 --> 00:11:30,881 (clears throat) 247 00:11:31,667 --> 00:11:35,747 Opens up your pores and pulls out bones you don't need. 248 00:11:37,041 --> 00:11:38,041 See? 249 00:11:38,166 --> 00:11:41,916 I told that doctor I had an extra bone, but he didn't believe me. 250 00:11:42,750 --> 00:11:44,630 I'm keeping my bones. 251 00:11:44,709 --> 00:11:45,789 I'm getting out. 252 00:11:47,750 --> 00:11:49,790 Uh, I can't move. 253 00:11:53,291 --> 00:11:54,041 (whispers) Jerry! 254 00:11:54,125 --> 00:11:54,995 Yeah? 255 00:11:55,667 --> 00:11:57,917 This bag isn't gro-u-t. It's grout. 256 00:11:58,000 --> 00:12:00,080 Uh, it's what the warriors use to patch the walls. 257 00:12:00,166 --> 00:12:01,246 It's like cement. 258 00:12:01,959 --> 00:12:03,379 I can't move. 259 00:12:03,792 --> 00:12:05,042 I can't move! 260 00:12:05,917 --> 00:12:09,957 You two numbskulls are gonna cost Rudy his dojo. 261 00:12:10,375 --> 00:12:11,995 (both stammering) 262 00:12:13,875 --> 00:12:14,995 (groans) 263 00:12:15,125 --> 00:12:18,745 Here, enjoy the relaxing vibrations of this high-impact massager. 264 00:12:18,834 --> 00:12:19,674 On the house. 265 00:12:19,750 --> 00:12:21,920 - (drilling) - (screaming) 266 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:23,290 Ow! Ow! 267 00:12:23,375 --> 00:12:25,165 He's gonna rip my head off, ma! 268 00:12:25,250 --> 00:12:26,080 Ow! 269 00:12:27,542 --> 00:12:29,212 ♪ Kickin' it with you! ♪ 270 00:12:29,291 --> 00:12:31,831 (Kim giggles) You were awesome! 271 00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,327 I don't think that eight-year-old is ever gonna play laser tag again. 272 00:12:34,375 --> 00:12:36,375 Well, when I saw him in my sights, I said 273 00:12:36,458 --> 00:12:40,458 "Kid, if you're tall enough to play, you're tall enough to eat laser." 274 00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:41,632 (giggles) 275 00:12:41,709 --> 00:12:43,539 We're finally gonna beat Riley from accounting 276 00:12:43,625 --> 00:12:45,785 and win your company's laser tag shootout tomorrow. 277 00:12:45,875 --> 00:12:49,075 There they are! My favorite father and daughter! 278 00:12:49,166 --> 00:12:50,076 Oh, boy... 279 00:12:51,792 --> 00:12:54,172 Mr. Crawford, I feel like we got off on the wrong foot, 280 00:12:54,250 --> 00:12:56,420 so I got you a little gift. 281 00:12:56,500 --> 00:12:59,630 Oh, that wasn't necessary. But thanks. 282 00:13:00,333 --> 00:13:02,253 Hey, it's the tie I saw at Bergdoff's. 283 00:13:02,333 --> 00:13:03,253 How did you know? 284 00:13:03,333 --> 00:13:06,753 Well, I saw you go into Bergdoff's, so I kinda followed you in. 285 00:13:07,667 --> 00:13:09,627 Kim. Your boyfriend is stalking me. 286 00:13:10,333 --> 00:13:15,633 It's not so much stalking as following you with a borderline unhealthy interest. 287 00:13:17,375 --> 00:13:18,325 Okay. 288 00:13:18,417 --> 00:13:20,377 It's all a little too weird for me. 289 00:13:20,458 --> 00:13:21,668 Come on, Kim, let's go. 290 00:13:22,667 --> 00:13:24,247 (sighs sharply) Jack, 291 00:13:24,375 --> 00:13:25,955 my father already doesn't like you. 292 00:13:26,041 --> 00:13:28,131 I mean, you're making things worse. What are you doing? 293 00:13:28,208 --> 00:13:29,748 I don't even know what's happening. 294 00:13:30,500 --> 00:13:32,750 Kim, you gotta set me up on a second date with your dad. 295 00:13:33,583 --> 00:13:35,253 You want a second date with my dad? 296 00:13:35,917 --> 00:13:37,167 More than anything. 297 00:13:40,959 --> 00:13:42,499 Oh. (chuckles) 298 00:13:43,208 --> 00:13:44,828 Hello. Reservations? 299 00:13:45,959 --> 00:13:47,289 There's no one here. 300 00:13:48,083 --> 00:13:49,173 Name? 301 00:13:49,250 --> 00:13:50,210 Lou. 302 00:13:50,291 --> 00:13:52,541 Well, as you can see, sir, we're very busy. 303 00:13:53,959 --> 00:13:56,079 Oh, look! Something just opened up. 304 00:13:56,166 --> 00:13:57,076 Follow me. 305 00:14:01,709 --> 00:14:02,959 Rudy, we're in trouble. 306 00:14:03,041 --> 00:14:05,331 Rudy, we're in trouble. 307 00:14:05,417 --> 00:14:08,877 Relax, it's not about what the food is, it's how you describe it. 308 00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:12,670 Good evening. 309 00:14:12,750 --> 00:14:15,000 I am your server Rudolpho. 310 00:14:15,500 --> 00:14:19,460 Tonight's special is marinated seeds of the monocot plant, 311 00:14:19,542 --> 00:14:24,002 with a side of oryza sativa from the pearl river valley of china. 312 00:14:24,083 --> 00:14:27,043 Both: Ooh, exotic! 313 00:14:27,750 --> 00:14:28,670 What is that? 314 00:14:28,750 --> 00:14:31,580 It's rice with a side of rice. 315 00:14:33,375 --> 00:14:34,875 I'll send over the salad boy. 316 00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:36,830 Oh, salad boy! 317 00:14:37,834 --> 00:14:40,334 Oh, salad-- I'm the salad boy, aren't I? 318 00:14:42,208 --> 00:14:43,208 I'm going. 319 00:14:46,625 --> 00:14:47,705 Some lettuce, 320 00:14:48,375 --> 00:14:49,325 onions, 321 00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:52,420 tomatoes, croutons... 322 00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:55,500 And we toss. 323 00:14:58,583 --> 00:15:00,133 (girls yell) 324 00:15:07,250 --> 00:15:08,830 I'll be back with some more salad. 325 00:15:11,959 --> 00:15:16,039 Oh, we would like to offer you a complimentary bottle of sparkling cider, 326 00:15:16,125 --> 00:15:19,375 which I will personally select from our world-renowned cellar. 327 00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:21,670 Just one second. 328 00:15:25,166 --> 00:15:26,706 Rudy: No! No! 329 00:15:26,792 --> 00:15:28,752 Ahh, yes! 330 00:15:31,125 --> 00:15:33,075 Oh, here we are. 331 00:15:33,792 --> 00:15:35,752 (chuckles) Just one second. 332 00:15:38,125 --> 00:15:38,955 (cork pops) 333 00:15:39,625 --> 00:15:40,745 - (clattering) - (clinking) 334 00:15:44,041 --> 00:15:45,131 Shaolin treasure? 335 00:15:46,250 --> 00:15:47,670 You guys aren't plumbers, are you? 336 00:15:47,750 --> 00:15:48,790 (chuckles) 337 00:15:49,125 --> 00:15:50,875 - Get 'em, guys! - Whoa! 338 00:15:51,875 --> 00:15:52,705 (groaning) 339 00:15:52,792 --> 00:15:54,922 Oh, look, mommy, they're putting on a show! 340 00:15:56,083 --> 00:15:57,293 It's not a show. 341 00:15:57,542 --> 00:16:00,382 Your father, the genius, has booked our vacation 342 00:16:00,458 --> 00:16:01,538 in the middle of a robbery! 343 00:16:01,625 --> 00:16:02,455 What? 344 00:16:02,542 --> 00:16:04,082 - Why would you do that? - You've really outdone yourself... 345 00:16:04,166 --> 00:16:05,496 Hey, what kind of robbery is this? 346 00:16:05,583 --> 00:16:08,043 Can I get a couple of gags over here, please? 347 00:16:08,125 --> 00:16:09,785 (girls chattering) 348 00:16:13,250 --> 00:16:14,330 (both laugh) 349 00:16:14,750 --> 00:16:16,250 - Yeah, yo! - Oh, yeah! 350 00:16:18,125 --> 00:16:19,825 You made it to the final round! 351 00:16:20,417 --> 00:16:22,207 Go, Crawfords! 352 00:16:22,291 --> 00:16:23,961 Hey. (groans) 353 00:16:26,375 --> 00:16:28,245 Everywhere I go, he's just... 354 00:16:28,875 --> 00:16:29,875 there. 355 00:16:30,166 --> 00:16:33,706 Dad, he's here because he's my boyfriend and I invited him. 356 00:16:34,041 --> 00:16:36,211 Now be nice. I'm gonna go grab a water. 357 00:16:37,500 --> 00:16:38,710 - (thud) - (groans) 358 00:16:38,792 --> 00:16:39,712 Oh! 359 00:16:39,875 --> 00:16:41,075 Are you okay? 360 00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:44,076 I don't know. I twisted my ankle on the sensor vest. 361 00:16:44,750 --> 00:16:45,580 I think I'm fine. 362 00:16:45,959 --> 00:16:47,169 No, no! Not fine! 363 00:16:47,250 --> 00:16:48,250 - Oh! - Not fine! 364 00:16:48,333 --> 00:16:51,253 Oh no, honey, you can't compete like this. 365 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:54,080 (sighs deeply) I'll have to forfeit. 366 00:16:54,375 --> 00:16:55,205 (exhales) 367 00:16:55,250 --> 00:16:56,460 Riley wins again. 368 00:16:56,542 --> 00:16:59,172 Are you allowed to play with a substitute? 369 00:16:59,625 --> 00:17:00,455 Both: Why? 370 00:17:02,792 --> 00:17:03,922 You know I still don't like you? 371 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:05,750 Yeah, I got that when you tried to shoot me. 372 00:17:06,166 --> 00:17:07,206 Twice. 373 00:17:11,625 --> 00:17:12,455 (Chuck groans) 374 00:17:12,875 --> 00:17:15,785 Riley's behind that barrel and his son's behind that one. 375 00:17:16,208 --> 00:17:17,208 And there's no way out. 376 00:17:17,792 --> 00:17:20,252 Well, I'll just have to make myself hard to hit. 377 00:17:20,875 --> 00:17:22,415 Whatever. No, don't go out there! 378 00:17:22,500 --> 00:17:23,630 You'll never come back. 379 00:17:27,333 --> 00:17:29,383 Ha-ha! We've got you now. 380 00:17:32,542 --> 00:17:33,882 (power off) 381 00:17:36,250 --> 00:17:37,500 Oh! (chuckles) 382 00:17:37,583 --> 00:17:40,253 Look at what you did! You took your own son out, Riley! 383 00:17:40,375 --> 00:17:42,375 - (laughs) - You're gonna pay for this, Crawford. 384 00:17:42,458 --> 00:17:43,418 Oh-- 385 00:17:43,959 --> 00:17:44,999 No! 386 00:17:45,625 --> 00:17:46,745 (power off) 387 00:17:46,834 --> 00:17:48,174 (gasps) 388 00:17:48,709 --> 00:17:50,499 You guys did it! You won! 389 00:17:50,583 --> 00:17:52,293 Yes! Oh, Jack! 390 00:17:53,208 --> 00:17:55,708 That was the bravest thing I have ever seen. 391 00:17:57,542 --> 00:18:00,832 What do you say you, me and your... (mumbles, sighs) 392 00:18:01,500 --> 00:18:04,130 ...boyfriend here go out and get some pizza? 393 00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:06,286 Oh, yes! (chuckling) 394 00:18:06,375 --> 00:18:08,455 (giggling) Jack, you did it. 395 00:18:08,542 --> 00:18:10,082 My dad finally likes you. 396 00:18:10,458 --> 00:18:12,328 Okay, come on, let's go. (chuckles) 397 00:18:16,542 --> 00:18:18,832 You're not wondering why I'm not limping? 398 00:18:19,166 --> 00:18:21,536 No, I know you faked an injury so I could look like a hero 399 00:18:21,625 --> 00:18:22,745 and bond with your dad. 400 00:18:22,834 --> 00:18:24,084 Part of all this... 401 00:18:24,792 --> 00:18:25,632 is this. 402 00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:28,170 Wait up, chuck! 403 00:18:30,000 --> 00:18:32,920 ♪ It's not as cool As kickin' it with you! ♪ 404 00:18:33,417 --> 00:18:34,247 (whispers) Hey. 405 00:18:34,625 --> 00:18:36,785 You think they can fix the leak in the upstairs faucet? 406 00:18:37,917 --> 00:18:39,707 They're not plumbers, they're thieves. 407 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:40,960 I mean, they could be both. 408 00:18:41,041 --> 00:18:42,581 My father says our plumber's a thief. 409 00:18:44,083 --> 00:18:46,043 We can't let them steal everything in the temple. 410 00:18:46,166 --> 00:18:47,206 We gotta stop 'em. 411 00:18:47,709 --> 00:18:48,829 Maybe I could help. 412 00:18:48,917 --> 00:18:50,537 (both laugh) 413 00:18:50,625 --> 00:18:51,495 You? 414 00:18:51,583 --> 00:18:53,383 What are you gonna do, tough guy? 415 00:18:53,458 --> 00:18:55,038 (girls giggling) 416 00:18:55,125 --> 00:18:55,995 Listen! 417 00:18:56,500 --> 00:18:58,380 He may not look like much of a man 418 00:18:58,458 --> 00:19:00,828 or act like much of a man or talk like much of a man-- 419 00:19:00,917 --> 00:19:02,327 Whoa, I'm right here! 420 00:19:03,667 --> 00:19:05,537 He just wants to make you two happy. 421 00:19:05,625 --> 00:19:06,665 You should be ashamed. 422 00:19:08,542 --> 00:19:10,672 Thank you, Rudy. I appreciate that. 423 00:19:10,750 --> 00:19:13,460 Well, it reached a point where I was like, give this poor guy... 424 00:19:13,542 --> 00:19:15,752 Lou! How did you get your hands free? 425 00:19:15,834 --> 00:19:18,674 I was blessed with my mother's slim wrists. 426 00:19:24,625 --> 00:19:25,875 (groans) 427 00:19:26,333 --> 00:19:27,173 They're free! 428 00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:28,710 They're free! Get them, guys! 429 00:19:28,792 --> 00:19:30,672 (girls yelp) 430 00:19:32,500 --> 00:19:34,040 Come here, you, huh! 431 00:19:34,750 --> 00:19:36,170 (grunting) 432 00:19:40,542 --> 00:19:41,752 - (grunts) - (groans) 433 00:19:53,375 --> 00:19:54,415 (grunts) 434 00:19:58,000 --> 00:19:59,290 (water splashes) 435 00:20:00,917 --> 00:20:01,997 You guys all right? 436 00:20:02,083 --> 00:20:04,003 Thanks to you, baby! 437 00:20:04,083 --> 00:20:06,753 That was the bravest thing I've ever seen! 438 00:20:06,834 --> 00:20:11,834 I'm going to call all my friends and tell them about my daddy, the hero. 439 00:20:11,917 --> 00:20:13,577 (giggling, chattering) 440 00:20:16,875 --> 00:20:20,455 Rudy, that was the worst vacation I've ever taken. 441 00:20:21,417 --> 00:20:24,537 But your debt's forgiven and you can keep your dojo. 442 00:20:24,917 --> 00:20:28,957 I think, because of you, my family's gonna look at me in a whole new light. 443 00:20:29,041 --> 00:20:31,421 Lou! Get my suitcases! 444 00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:33,420 We're gettin' outta here now! 445 00:20:35,667 --> 00:20:36,497 Maybe not. 446 00:20:36,583 --> 00:20:37,833 Coming, sunshine! 447 00:20:42,542 --> 00:20:44,832 I don't remember the last time I had this much fun with someone. 448 00:20:44,917 --> 00:20:48,997 You know, I feel like I can totally be myself around you. 449 00:20:51,166 --> 00:20:52,916 I feel the same way, Jack. 450 00:20:53,959 --> 00:20:56,169 Jack! Our movie's about to start, and we're... 451 00:20:57,500 --> 00:20:58,330 Dad? 452 00:21:03,208 --> 00:21:05,208 Wait. What's going on? 453 00:21:06,667 --> 00:21:08,577 Kim, did, did you finish your homework? 454 00:21:09,792 --> 00:21:12,332 - No, but I was gonna-- - No buts about it. 455 00:21:12,667 --> 00:21:15,537 Now you go home and finish that homework right this instant, young lady. 456 00:21:21,083 --> 00:21:22,673 (screaming groan) 457 00:21:24,583 --> 00:21:25,793 Solid parenting, Chuck. 458 00:21:25,875 --> 00:21:27,165 - Boom! - Boo-yah! 459 00:21:27,250 --> 00:21:28,130 - (chuckles) - Movie? 460 00:21:28,208 --> 00:21:29,828 - Popcorn's on me. - (Jack giggles) 461 00:21:30,250 --> 00:21:31,830 ♪ Kickin' it with you! ♪ 462 00:21:33,041 --> 00:21:35,041 (closing theme music) 463 00:21:57,125 --> 00:21:57,955 Man: Poor soul. 464 00:21:58,041 --> 00:21:59,081 (dog snarls, barks) 465 00:22:02,041 --> 00:22:02,881 Boy: Yes! 33113

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