Original subtitles

I think I did pretty well on that French test.

It was a math test.

-Ay, dios mio! -That's Spanish.

Oh. Well, then I did very badly either way.

Don't worry. We're never going to need all this math.

Yet everyone always tells you how important it is.

If I had a nickel for every time I've heard it I'd have...

I'd have... Some nickels.

Ow!

Ha-ha!

First victim of my holographic chair!

Angus! That was incredibly mean! Why would you do that to me?

It was meant for Fletcher.

Oh. Okay then.

Well, I don't understand. Our A.N.T. Pads can't project 3D images.

Mine can.

I accessed the manufacturer's secure server

and downloaded an experimental beta update.

I'd be happy to tell you more of the details, Fletcher,

while you relax in this completely real lounge chair.

No way. I'm not falling for that.

Suit yourself.

Ah!

-(sucking) -(Chyna) Wait.

You broke into the Z-Tech servers?

They're a huge, powerful technology company!

Aren't you worried about getting in trouble?

Nope. There is absolutely no way they can trace it back to me.

(Chyna screams)

Because I used Fletcher's computer to do it.

Oh.

Okay then.

♪ Ooh, ooh, doo, doo ♪

-♪ Ooh, ooh, doo, doo ♪ -Whoo!

♪ Everybody's got that thing Something different we all bring ♪

♪ Don't you let 'em clip your wings You got it, you got it ♪

♪ We're on fire and we blaze In extraordinary ways ♪

♪ 365 days We got it, we got it ♪

♪ If you can dream it ♪

♪ You can be it ♪

♪ If you can feel it ♪

♪ You can believe it ♪

♪ 'Cause I am, you are, we are ♪

♪ Exceptional, exceptional ♪

♪ Yeah, I am, you are, we are ♪

♪ Exceptional, exceptional ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh ♪

♪ Ooh, ooh ♪

Whoo!

Don't hurt me! Do you not speak English?

I'll say it in Spanish. X plus three equals seven!

(shouts) He's got a weapon!

-(beeping) -I am the great and powerful Grundy!

(all screaming)

I created this new voice modulation app that makes your voice sound

scary and awesome!

You're Zoltan Grundy!

I read your book about how you founded Z-Tech

and built it into the world's largest technology company.

You liked my book?

I said I read your book.

Mr. Grundy, I'm a huge fan.

I have your cell phone, your laptop,

your desktop, your mp3 player, your tablet,

your mini-tablet, and your jumbo mini-tablet.

Wow. You have a really good marketing department.

If you like the jumbo mini-tablet,

you'll love the mega nano jumbo mini-tablet. It's huge,

while also being quite tiny.

Now,

where is the villainous cyber-crook responsible for the break-in?

It was him! He framed me! He used my computer!

What!

You're telling me some kid

breached our network,

bypassed our intrusion detection algorithms, and somehow

figured out the answer to my security question?

I mean how did he know the name of my first pet?

I miss Password.

Such a great dog.

So, what are you going to do to me?

Well, I'd like to start...

by shaking your hand.

But I can't, because I'm on my private jet.

I'm not flying anywhere. It's just very comfortable.

So, what are you?

Some sort of child prodigy?

Everyone in the A.N.T. Program's a prodigy.

I'm a musician, Fletcher's an artist, Olive has an eidetic memory,

and that kid rides a stationary bike!

You're in a special program for child prodigies?

I was a child prodigy!

Yes, we know. Some of us labored through your book.

I've got to meet you guys in person and learn all about this A.N.T. Program.

(strong voice) I'm on my way. Commandos, fall back!

I love this app!

Whew. That was close.

Ha!

Zoltan Grundy is coming here! Do you know how much he's worth?

Every human life has an immeasurable intrinsic worth, so you can't really...

Sixty-two billion dollars!

Yeah, so we figured you'd want to roll out the red carpet.

Or at least hit on him in a sloppy and embarrassing way.

This is a huge opportunity!

Grundy gives millions of dollars to all sorts of causes.

Maybe he'll sponsor the A.N.T. Program!

(gasps) Think what we could use that money for!

-New equipment! -Teacher training!

A principal who doesn't hate children.

What? No.

I can finally get a koi pond for my office!

Right now the koi just flop around and die on the carpet.

Well, Mr. Grundy will be here soon. We'd better get this place in shape.

Way ahead of you.

What are you doing?

We need to make everything here look old and run down.

Like this?

And here is the shining jewel of Webster High,

the Ant Farm.

Wow.

Like many of the women my mother sets me up with,

this place looks much worse in person.

I can't believe a handsome man like you would need

someone to fix him up with women.

Sloppy, check. Embarrassing, check.

How can we be expected to learn in an environment like this,

crumbling infrastructure, ancient equipment,

dead fish all over the carpets...

To say nothing of the filth and disgusting "food" in the cafeteria!

We didn't do anything to the cafeteria.

If only there were some way

to improve the situation of us poor, unfortunate prodigies

with whom you have a deep personal connection.

There is. I am going to make the education of these gifted children

-my highest priority. -Yes!

I will spare no expense making sure they have everything they need to thrive.

-Yes! -By building a new, improved school

and taking these prodigies away from Webster High forever!

Yes! Take them! Take them all!

Someone has to rescue these gifted children from this...

eyesore!

There's no way you're taking these prodigies away from me.

They are extremely loyal.

Where did you say we could get an application?

You know, I'll just give you my information.

Hold still, Susan.

Hey, Olive! I wrote a song for my audition for Mr. Grundy's new school.

It's called "Stars Aligning."

And yes, I know that stars are fixed points in space and can't actually align,

but it's a song, so cut me some slack, Olive!

Interesting factoid. You actually don't cut slack, you release it.

It's a nautical term dating back to 17th Century England.

Wow. For your audition, you should definitely not tell that story!

I would never do that. Gosh, Chyna, release me some slack.

Besides, I'm not gonna audition.

I can't go to another school. I love it here.

You hate it here. You complain about everything.

Last week, you complained they didn't have a complaint box.

Because, I love complaining.

Besides, I can't leave Webster. I'm needed here.

You are? By who!

I've never told anyone this, but...

I'm Wacky.

You're not Wacky. In fact, I've seen you in the same room as him.

Nope. Couldn't happen. Impossible.

I'll prove to you that I'm Wacky. Check out my wolf moves!

See? I'm marking my territory by releasing my own scent.

Okay, I take that back. You definitely are wacky.

Olive,

what's going on? Why don't you want to go?

Chyna, it's a boarding school. Do you know what that means?

"A boarding school is an educational institution

where children study, live away from their parents

with their fellow students and teachers and/or administrators."

Next time you say, "Do you know what that means,"

please give me a chance to say, "Yes."

I can't live miles away from home.

I'm scared to go to this school, and I live across the street.

Olive, there will be no reason to be scared.

Because I'll be there with you, to support you.

And think about how much fun we'd have. We could be roommates.

Now that you mention it,

if we were roommates, I'm sure I'd have a new bunch of things to complain about.

All right, I'm in!

What are you doing?

Marking my territory. I don't want people near my locker.

Roommates, huh?

To prove that I deserve to go to your school,

I have recreated a famous painting using only car windshield dust,

Edvard Munch's The Scream.

Or as I like to call it,

"What my dad looked like when I told him I wanted to be an artist."

Very impressive.

Plus it's a great way to repurpose old abandoned rust buckets

that no one would otherwise want.

Hey, there's my car!

Why did you draw a picture of your father on my windshield!

For my audition, I will demonstrate my eidetic memory.

Name any page from any book and I'll recite the text verbatim.

My autobiography,

page... 47!

(in British accent) "I've always been rather fond of sherbet.

My favorite of all the sherbet flavors is indubitably Rainbow,

but if forced to select a single flavor,

I would have to lean toward..."

-Why are you stopping? -That was as far as I could get.

After that, I threw it in the fireplace.

I'm the most gifted computer science prodigy in the country.

You should be auditioning for me.

No.

Okay.

-Next, please. -Wait, wait!

♪ The itsy-bitsy spider Went up the water spout ♪

- ♪ Down came the rain and washed... ♪ -Thank you!

We'll be in touch.

Next!

For my audition, I'm going to sing a song I wrote.

♪ Breaking all the boundaries tonight ♪

♪ I can see the stars aligning ♪

♪ Finally I'm free to live my life ♪

♪ I'm gonna keep on, keep on shining ♪

♪ What gotta be, gotta be ♪

♪ I'm gonna follow my dreams ♪

♪ There ain't no doubt about it ♪

♪ See, I am breaking All the boundaries tonight ♪

♪ Yeah, I can see the stars aligning ♪

-I feel a smash hit coming! -(horn sounds)

A double cheeseburger, onion rings, and a large orange drink!

Wait, this isn't a drive-through.

It is now.

All right, the admission emails should be arriving...

Now.

(phones buzz simultaneously)

Okay, let's all open them at the same time.

-On three. One... -I got in!

-Me too. Of course. -Woo-hoo!

Wait.

This school is supposed to be free.

Why am I being charged a cleaning fee?

Your reputation precedes you.

I didn't get in?

What's the matter, roomie?

Uh... Nothing.

I'm just bummed because because I'm really going to miss Principal Skidmore.

So, you're all leaving! Well, good riddance!

I never liked any of you! See you in my nightmares!

Yeah, I can see why you'd miss that.

Is this Z-Tech customer support?

Good. I think there was a mistake.

I didn't get in to your new boarding school.

Well, I don't see how removing my phone battery is going to fix that.

You know what? I'd like to speak to your supervisor.

Yes. I didn't get into your new boarding school.

For customer support, you're not very supportive, Larry.

I'd like to speak with your supervisor.

Supervisor, please.

Supervisor, please.

Supervisor, please.

Supervisor, please.

Supervisor, please.

(Zoltan) Customer support. How can I help you?

Mr. Grundy? This is Chyna Parks.

Look, I know you're probably in some important business meeting right now.

Yes. That's exactly where I am.

I just wanted to talk to you about the email you sent.

I was hoping it was a mistake.

It wasn't.

The only mistake here was agreeing to cover customer service

while Cindy goes off to have her baby.

Please, Mr. Grundy! I have to get into your school!

It's an amazing opportunity! And all my friends are going!

And Olive won't survive without me!

I'm sorry, Chyna, I chose a different musical prodigy.

Now I have to go. I'm up to my neck in bubbles.

I mean, spreadsheets.

A different musical prodigy?

Who?

Yes, I got in! I got in!

You got into what?

These boots!

Oh, and Zoltan Grundy's prodigy school.

You auditioned?

Of course I did.

Mr. Grundy practically begged me to.

I know I'm not an A.N.T. but please let me audition.

I beg you. I'm way more gifted

than any of those weird, awkward prodigy freaks.

I was one of those weird awkward prodigy freaks.

I know.

Anyway,

for my audition I'm going to be singing

a much improved cover of a song by a homely, untalented girl.

♪ Ow, I have got my things ♪

♪ Something different that I bring ♪

♪ I let no one clip my wings I got it, I got it ♪

♪ I'm on fire and I blaze ♪

♪ In extraordinary ways ♪

♪ 365 days, I got it, I got it ♪

♪ 'Cause, I am, I are, me am ♪

♪ Exceptional, exceptional ♪

♪ Me, me, me ♪

♪ Me, me ♪

♪ Me ♪

Wait. Why did you tell me the part of the story

that proves you begged him to audition?

I like talking about myself.

Anyway, the point is, of course I got in.

I've always told you I'm just as talented as you are.

Why are you taking the battery out?

At this point, I'll try anything.

I'm so glad you talked me into this.

Boarding school is going to be so awesome!

I'll be away from my parents, but we'll be roommates

and we can share clothes.

Actually, we can't.

Well, you're right. I'm a little more stylish.

Olive, we can't share clothes because I'm not going to be at the school.

Your parents aren't letting you go!

I'm going to go talk to them right now!

No, no!

That's not it.

They're actually really excited.

Are you worried about sleeping in a strange bed

that hasn't been disinfected

by your ultraviolet, anti-bacterial furniture wand yet?

'Cause I'm bringing mine!

-No, that's not it. -Oh, I know what it is.

You're worried that because the school is in Palo Alto,

which means "tall sticks,"

the school's gonna be surrounded by scary tall sticks.

But don't worry, Chyna, they're just trees.

They're just trees.

I can't wait to get into our new room. We could start...

I didn't get in, okay?

(sighs)

I didn't get into the school.

What?

I can't believe this.

(stammers) I have got to sit down.

(buzzing)

(sighs)

But you're the most talented musician I know.

And I was once on an airport shuttle with Li'l Weezy.

Well, apparently Weezy and I aren't as talented as Lexi.

She got the spot for the musical prodigy.

What! Lexi got in?

I don't want to be roommates with Lexi!

I don't want to share clothes with her!

Although she does have some pretty nice things.

She did just get some new boots. Those things are kicking.

(sighs)

You talked me into going to the school, and now I have to go without you?

I'm really sorry, Olive.

And I don't know what to tell my dad.

He's been telling everyone that his daughter

got into the best and freest school in the country.

So what are you going to do?

I guess I'm just going to have to face the music.

Hey, girls.

-Hi, Dad. Listen... -(chuckling)

I will listen to you playing your going-away present!

(imitates playing guitar)

A 1961 Harmon Tonemaster?

But these are really expensive.

We know you've been wanting one forever,

so your mom and I got one for you.

Cameron even chipped in his allowance.

He doesn't know it yet, but he chipped in.

Dad, thank you. But...

You shouldn't have bought this for me.

You deserve it!

You're obviously the best at what you do,

so you should have the best guitar.

We are going to miss you so much.

Well, then, maybe I just shouldn't go.

Are you kidding?

You got into the best and freest school in the country.

I'm so proud of you.

(laughs nervously)

You, too.

-(sighs) Chyna. -(door closes)

You didn't tell him you didn't get in.

Well, I couldn't!

He was just so happy for me.

Don't worry. I'll tell him tomorrow.

What? I said I was gonna tell him tomorrow.

Today's not tomorrow. Today's today!

Chyna! What are you doing at this school?

Well, I was going to tell my dad,

he was so proud of me. I couldn't break his heart!

Anyway, the next thing I knew, I was packing.

The next, next thing I knew, he was dropping me off.

The next, next, next thing I knew was... Well...

It's this conversation.

This place is awesome!

Can you believe we live at Z-Tech now?

Well, I guess we should make ourselves at home.

Way ahead of you.

(sighs)

What? You don't live in a houseboat?

There you are, Chyna.

Of course I'm here. Why wouldn't I?

It's not like I don't belong here.

Whatever.

I was just going to make it clear

that even though I'm technically an Ant now, I'm not one of you.

If anything, I'm the Queen Ant.

There are no queen ants.

You're thinking of bees.

-Interesting factoid... -Oh, great. You brought those with you.

Ant colonies do have a queen.

She is the most important ant of all.

Exactly.

-She does none of the work. -Nor should she.

She is easily identified by her grotesquely enlarged abdomen.

Okay, I'm not the queen.

(Zoltan) Hello, everyone.

Welcome to the new Ant Farm,

your home for the next four years!

This state of the art facility

includes your new school,

recreation facility,

and living quarters.

And by attending school here,

there will be no limits

to the accomplishments that you can achieve!

All accomplishments become property of Z-Tech.

-(thudding) -Ow!

-Sorry. -That's okay.

Is that a talking duffel bag?

Oh, yeah. It's the latest in luggage technology.

You see, I also have a talking hip sack.

(in high-pitched voice) People make fun of me,

but I am one of the most convenient and secure places

to store cash, identification documents, and other personal items.

You said it, Sacky! Sacky...

-(sighs) -Anyway,

your new Ant Farm is the world's first roomavator.

This entire room is in the center of the building.

It moves up and down like an elevator

and also rotates, like an elevator that rotates.

(whirring)

(students exclaiming in wonder)

Weird. It doesn't even feel like we're moving.

Much like a houseboat, my dear boy.

That's because the roomavator employs inertial dampeners.

And, because the Ant Farm is a roomavator,

these doors can open into any room in the building.

(elevator dings)

The music room. Oh. You know who would love that?

Me!

-Uh, no, Baggy. -(kicks)

Why would you, a talking duffel bag, enjoy a music room?

Can you believe her, Sacky?

(in high-pitched voice) I know, right?

Let's just see the next room!

-(beeping) -Oh, careful!

Some of the rooms in this building house sensitive, top-secret R&D facilities.

(elevator dings)

-What is he doing? -(lullaby playing on mobile)

(Zoltan) Working on a mobile phone mobile.

Cell phones for babies is a huge untapped market!

Oh, of course, this project is still in its infancy.

(laughing)

We also have a fully equipped health club and spa.

(dings)

Oh, is this the tour?

I kind of already showed myself around.