Original subtitles

(Your car with plate number 112 is about to be impounded. Please pay the loan installment

of 52,332.3 Baht within today. Our apologies, if it has already been paid.)

Boo!

What a scaredy cat you are.

When did you come?

A while ago.

So, how was it?

It was so weird.

What’s weird?

First,

let’s start with you.

What’s with the sunglasses?

Do you know the word “fashion”?

Well,

my wage is really low.

How much?

60,000 Baht.

What?

Would that be enough for the car payment?

That’s what I’m thinking.

Another thing,

the actors are forced to drink chicken-shake.

It is making them sick.

They are forced to have a nose job

and not allowed to use cellphone.

Is this something normal?

I don’t know.

Are you leaving now?

I have to wake up early tomorrow for a photoshoot at 5am.

Wait.

Before leaving, take off the sunglasses, will you?

I told you. It’s called fashion.

You will get run over by a car.

I can see.

Hey!

Thank you for tidying up my room.

Just treat me to Shabu-shabu.

Hey, take off the sunglasses.

No.

(Call It Waht You Want)

"It’s time for news report."

The first story for today.

A man was killed by a falling meteor.

How is that possible?

A metero fell from the sky killing the man instantly.

It's a rare event.

The chances are very small.

At first, it was believed to be an urban legend,

until NASA rests of a meteor near the place where the incident happened.

Actually, the meteor was quite small...

How could I forget him?

This is the news that everyone has been waiting for for 7,000 years.

7,000 years?!

That is a very long time!

Yes, the Neowise comet will be visible from Earth, which happens once every 7,000 years.

Hello?

Hello, James.

Yes?

Who is this?

This means it will fly very close to Earth.

At first, astronomists were concerned that it would make conact,

I’m watching the Neowise comet news report, too!

Is that you, Ait?

How do you know?

Well, I just watched a casting video of you.

What video?

Don’t act like you don’t know.

Why did it take so long to remember?

Well, you have a plaster on your nose.

I couldn't tell first.

What are you doing?

Reading the script.

What about you, P’James?

Don’t call me P’.

Oh, I forgot. James.

What are you doing, James?

I’m also reading the script.

So, why did you call?

I thought I could call you 24 hours.

Sure, but is there really something you want to say?

Do I need to have a reason for calling?

Well, no. Of course, you can call.

Are you allowed to use your phone?

I’m using my mom’s.

What are you eating?

Banana.

What? Sucking a banana?

No, I'm eating a banana!

Is it good?

What do you mean?

The thing you’re sucking.

Do bananas have a distinctive flavor?

It just tastes like a banana.

Do you like to eat a banana late at night?

Yeah, I like to eat one before bedtime.

So, are you wearing a shirt?

Yes.

What about pants?

Are you a pervert or something?

I’m asking because I want to know what are you wearing.

Are you planning to go and see the comet?

No, I’m gonna cut shots.

You’re gonna cumshot?

No! Cutting shots and scenes for the series.

What the hell?

What are you doing?

Eating a banana.

Have you ever tried fried bananas from Sis Ueng near Pracha Uthit street?

Sis Ueng is near where I live.

You live on Pracha Uthit street?

Yes, Soi 22.

I live in Soi 18.

Really?

Right now?

What’s the name of the singer from the song “Bang Bang” with Jessie J?

Taylor Swift?

No, how the hell could Taylor sing that song?

Ariana Grande?

Yes! I like her song “Nasa.”

I like “thank you, next.”

Sleepy?

I want to play badminton.

Hmm?

I want to play badminton.

Go to sleep.

James.

What?

Can I ask you a favor?

Sure.

Can you stay on the phone until I fall asleep?

Sure.

Goodnight.

So… do I have to say anything?

If you say something, then how can I sleep?

Alright.

Go to sleep.

(Your car plate 112 has been impounded. Should there be any enquiry, please call 51270-89.)

Shit, my car has been impounded.

Hello, James.

Ait, is that you?

Yes.

Who were you going to call?

I wanted to call you.

What’s up?

Why did you hang up on me yesterday night?

When?

I don’t know.

You weren’t on the phone anymore, when I woke up.

Sorry.

Listen, will you drive pass Pracha Uthit Soi 22 today?

Yes.

Are you craving fried bananas?

No…

Could you pick me up?

Sure.

But please wait for another two hours.

I have an appointment with the doctor.

Let’s meet at Hello Coffee Shop.

Alright, see you.

Hello, Ait.

Hello, James.

Where are you?

I’m at the coffee shop.

Where are you sitting?

Somewhere near…

Oh, I can see you.

Wait.

Here, fried bananas from Sis Ueng.

James.

I bought some fried bananas for you.

Thank you.

What are you up to?

Get up.

Let’s go to work.

What happened to your car?

P’James. Did your car break down?

Told you not to call me P’

Alright, alright.

So, what happened to your car?

The stirring wheel is locked.

How can it lock itself?

Well…

My car is very old.

What are you doing?

Breaking down scenes.

I thought you already did it last night.

How slow.

Please, let me focus.

Have you eaten?

Eat the fried bananas I bought you.

I think I left them at the coffee shop.

That’s alright.

I’ll pull over at a gas station.

No need, just go.

Ok.

Can I eat something in your car?

Sure.

Did your boyfriend make you a sandwich?

A friend made it for me.

May I have some?

My mouth is here.

Tasty!

Can you wipe it off?

Driving in the car with the actors is forbidden.

He lives near me. So..

Apologies,

but I didn’t ask.

If you got caught by a fan and they could take photos and post on Twitter,

do you know how much damage that could do?

I’m responsible for the image of the actors.

If this showed up in the news,

it will be the talk of the town among fans on Twitter.

They won’t know that we’re tricking them.

Do you know how much I had to invest to create a fictional couple?

Everything costs a lot of money.

I had to invest on creating the actors' image.

And I’m not the only one investing.

What I do is not tricking,

it’s to satisfy our consumers

and make money.

Fantasizing and imagining,

you know it well.

You are a director.

A broken doll that costs 39 Baht

can be auctioned to 300,000 Baht.

If they are filled with joy,

the supporters benefit from it.

Your salary, which is on this check, comes from that.

Come and get it after the workshop.

James,

keep the word “tricking” for…

directors who are in secret relationships with actors.

Bas, I prepared all the scenes for the beach sequences.

Bas,

are you okay?

Yep.

Hey, what is going on?

I…

I am…

(Call It What You Want)